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Schlaf schön, solange du noch kannst
Du kannst dich nicht mehr erinnern. Aber er wird dich nie wieder vergessen lassen.
Maklerin Gemma wächst das Leben über den Kopf. Sie verbringt lange Tage im Büro, dabei hätte sie gern mehr Zeit für ihren Sohn. Ihr Mann wiederum plant schon das zweite Kind und den Umzug zu den Schwiegereltern. Als Gemma eine Einladung zu einer Konferenz in einem Hotel erhält, kommt diese Auszeit wie gerufen – dass sie dort zufällig ihren Klienten David trifft, noch mehr. Doch am nächsten Morgen kann sich Gemma an nichts mehr erinnern, und auch David scheint verschwunden. Plötzlich erreichen Gemma Fotos von besagter Nacht. Die 36-Jährige ahnt nicht, dass diese auch ein verdrängtes Trauma aus ihrer Jugend wieder an die Oberfläche zerren …
Maklerin Gemma wächst das Leben über den Kopf. Sie verbringt lange Tage im Büro, dabei hätte sie gern mehr Zeit für ihren Sohn. Ihr Mann wiederum plant schon das zweite Kind und den Umzug zu den Schwiegereltern. Als Gemma eine Einladung zu einer Konferenz in einem Hotel erhält, kommt diese Auszeit wie gerufen – dass sie dort zufällig ihren Klienten David trifft, noch mehr. Doch am nächsten Morgen kann sich Gemma an nichts mehr erinnern, und auch David scheint verschwunden. Plötzlich erreichen Gemma Fotos von besagter Nacht. Die 36-Jährige ahnt nicht, dass diese auch ein verdrängtes Trauma aus ihrer Jugend wieder an die Oberfläche zerren …
465 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 24, 2018
170 people are currently reading
4769 people want to read
About the author
Mary Torjussen
9 books352 followersMary Torjussen has an MA in Creative Writing from Liverpool John Moores University. She worked for several years as a teacher and lives outside of Liverpool, where Gone Without a Trace is set.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 383 reviews
May 20, 2018
4 Stars.
Gemma’s happy little world is about to explode. Little does she know. Someone desperately wants to destroy her. Everything Gemma has built and worked so hard for, is about to shatter just like a pane of glass. She is like a pawn in her own chess game. Now, it’s Gemma’s move.
If your interest isn’t piqued, it should be.
Mary Torjussen has written a compelling and truly interesting read in which I was fully invested. The characters are full of intrigue and complexity and they pulled me in from the get go. “The Girl I Used to Be” was my very first Mary Torjussen novel - it surely won’t be my last.
This was a Traveling Sister Read with Brenda and Kaceey. For Full Traveling SIster Reviews, please see Brenda and Norma’s Blog: https://twosisterslostinacoulee.com
Thank you to Edelweiss, Berkley, Penguin Publishing Group and Mary Torjussen for an ARC of this novel in exchange for an honest review.
Published on Edelweiss, Goodreads, Twitter and Amazon.
Gemma’s happy little world is about to explode. Little does she know. Someone desperately wants to destroy her. Everything Gemma has built and worked so hard for, is about to shatter just like a pane of glass. She is like a pawn in her own chess game. Now, it’s Gemma’s move.
If your interest isn’t piqued, it should be.
Mary Torjussen has written a compelling and truly interesting read in which I was fully invested. The characters are full of intrigue and complexity and they pulled me in from the get go. “The Girl I Used to Be” was my very first Mary Torjussen novel - it surely won’t be my last.
This was a Traveling Sister Read with Brenda and Kaceey. For Full Traveling SIster Reviews, please see Brenda and Norma’s Blog: https://twosisterslostinacoulee.com
Thank you to Edelweiss, Berkley, Penguin Publishing Group and Mary Torjussen for an ARC of this novel in exchange for an honest review.
Published on Edelweiss, Goodreads, Twitter and Amazon.
August 10, 2018
4 Thrilling Stars 🌟🌟🌟🌟
This was a quick compelling read... The true brilliance of this book is the fact that gemma the main character could be any of us.... she could be you... she could be me... so throughout this entire book all I could think is..... what would I do in this situation? And there are definitely no easy answers... and truth be told even after finishing this book I still have no idea what I would do!
Gemma has a pretty good life... a loving husband, a beautiful son, a successful business.... however Gemma is a bit stressed out and a little jealous of her husband Joe getting to stay home with their son... so one night while away at a conference she decides to cut a little loose and go out to dinner by herself... she wakes up the next morning with a killer hangover and no memory of the night before... last thing she remembers is having dinner with a male colleague.... this is where you ask yourself, what would I do in this situation? Would you tell your husband? Would he trust that you did not cheat on him? Do you trust that you did not cheat on him? To make a bad situation worse a month later Gamma starts receiving blackmail pictures and correspondence.... The more time gemma spends debating whether or not to confess to her husband what is going on, the larger hole she digs herself and the more lies she tells....
Reading about gemma navigating her self through this complex situation was so engrossing... she was so relatable and likable you really wanted her to figure things out... as the book progresses there are some definite reveals and twist that I did not see coming... so perfectly paced... I seriously finish this in a day, could not put it down! A fabulous thriller from start to satisfying ending...
Strongly recommend to all my psychological thriller loving friends and if you haven’t jumped on the psychological thriller bandwagon yet, what are you waiting for???
*** many thanks to Headline for my copy of this book ***
This was a quick compelling read... The true brilliance of this book is the fact that gemma the main character could be any of us.... she could be you... she could be me... so throughout this entire book all I could think is..... what would I do in this situation? And there are definitely no easy answers... and truth be told even after finishing this book I still have no idea what I would do!
Gemma has a pretty good life... a loving husband, a beautiful son, a successful business.... however Gemma is a bit stressed out and a little jealous of her husband Joe getting to stay home with their son... so one night while away at a conference she decides to cut a little loose and go out to dinner by herself... she wakes up the next morning with a killer hangover and no memory of the night before... last thing she remembers is having dinner with a male colleague.... this is where you ask yourself, what would I do in this situation? Would you tell your husband? Would he trust that you did not cheat on him? Do you trust that you did not cheat on him? To make a bad situation worse a month later Gamma starts receiving blackmail pictures and correspondence.... The more time gemma spends debating whether or not to confess to her husband what is going on, the larger hole she digs herself and the more lies she tells....
Reading about gemma navigating her self through this complex situation was so engrossing... she was so relatable and likable you really wanted her to figure things out... as the book progresses there are some definite reveals and twist that I did not see coming... so perfectly paced... I seriously finish this in a day, could not put it down! A fabulous thriller from start to satisfying ending...
Strongly recommend to all my psychological thriller loving friends and if you haven’t jumped on the psychological thriller bandwagon yet, what are you waiting for???
*** many thanks to Headline for my copy of this book ***
April 14, 2018
When Gemma Brogan gave birth to her son she and her husband agreed that he would be the one to stay at home and care for their child while she got her real estate business up and running. Now four years later Gemma is beginning to resent being the only bread winner in the marriage and the long hours she puts in at the office although she still loves her family.
When a business trip calls Gemma away she gets a bit upset again when her husband had already put their son to bed and she missed talking to him. Frustrated to yet again miss out she heads out of her room and runs into a client who invites her to dinner. The night led to a lot of talking and quite a few drinks which left Gemma kicking herself for the hangover in the morning but when Gemma begins to receive threatening messages she begins to wonder just what happened that night she can’t recall.
The Girl I Used to Be by Mary Torjussen is a psychological thriller that is mostly told from Gemma’s point of view in the present but it does switch the point of view and include flashes back to past events in a few places. The story is one that is super easy to follow and everything flows along nicely though.
After reading Gone Without a Trace last year I knew when I saw The Girl I Used to Be I needed to pick this one up and thankfully yet again I found a book that was easy to get lost in as the story unfolded. As expected I found that just when you think you know what is going on there will be another twist and layer added in to change up the story and keep one guessing and the pages turning.
I received an advance copy from the publisher via NetGalley.
For more reviews please visit https://carriesbookreviews.com/
When a business trip calls Gemma away she gets a bit upset again when her husband had already put their son to bed and she missed talking to him. Frustrated to yet again miss out she heads out of her room and runs into a client who invites her to dinner. The night led to a lot of talking and quite a few drinks which left Gemma kicking herself for the hangover in the morning but when Gemma begins to receive threatening messages she begins to wonder just what happened that night she can’t recall.
The Girl I Used to Be by Mary Torjussen is a psychological thriller that is mostly told from Gemma’s point of view in the present but it does switch the point of view and include flashes back to past events in a few places. The story is one that is super easy to follow and everything flows along nicely though.
After reading Gone Without a Trace last year I knew when I saw The Girl I Used to Be I needed to pick this one up and thankfully yet again I found a book that was easy to get lost in as the story unfolded. As expected I found that just when you think you know what is going on there will be another twist and layer added in to change up the story and keep one guessing and the pages turning.
I received an advance copy from the publisher via NetGalley.
For more reviews please visit https://carriesbookreviews.com/
May 8, 2018
A wonderful, psychological thriller that will make you wonder what you would do if this happened to you!!!
I am a big fan of Mary Torjussen’s last book Gone Without a Trace. As a psychologist, I always find books that deal with the character’s mindset effectively to be so compelling, and this is an area Mary really excels in as an author. This book was one I read in two days (which, for someone who works full-time and has a dissertation to write is quite an endorsement). The steady building of suspense in this book had the reader feeling slightly off-kilter along with the protagonist—and that is what made it so hard to put down! I found myself skipping my lunch break to read a bit more, and turning down plans for drinks after work because I had to know what would happen next!
Plot
Gemma owns her own real estate business and loves her career. She has a wonderful husband and a beautiful son, but she also has some darkness in her past. Though Gemma loves her husband and they agreed for him to stay home with their young son while she builds her business, she finds herself occasionally resenting the time he gets with their son. But Gemma would never do anything to jeopardize the family she loves so much.
Until one day, Gemma is out with a client for dinner, and the next thing she knows she wakes up alone in her hotel room with no memory of the night and a blistering hangover… Gemma would never cheat on her husband, but she can’t seem to remember the events of the evening. Sure, she used to be a heavy drinker, but that is in her past, isn’t it?
As Gemma tries to shake off the sense of unease she had that fateful night, she begins getting reminders in the mail. First, she receives a receipt from that night. But why would the hotel mail her a copy of her receipt? Then, she gets a photo of her kissing someone who is not her husband in the hotel. As Gemma’s world begins to unravel, and the reminders get increasingly threatening, Gemma wonders if she will ever remember what happened that night, and if she does, will it be too late to save her marriage??
Reflection
Gosh—I loved this book! Though I loved Mary’s first book, there is never a guarantee that the second one will live up to the first. In fact, often it is hard for an author to write a book that lives up to what was loved about the first book—but Mary Torjussen has done it! This book was very different in terms of the plot and characters from her first book, but the writing elements I loved were still there.
The slow but steady build in suspense was masterful. At the beginning, this could have just been a book about the struggles of work and marriage. And yet, there was always the sense of unease. That sense built throughout the book until the plot burst onto the page. I found myself at about 35% in shock and horror about what was happening. I couldn’t imagine being in Gemma’s spot! What would I do??? And the memory gap was masterful. The notion throughout the book that you can almost grasp the memory, but it escapes you—that is something we can all understand, and it really added to the suspense.
I loved Gemma. She was damaged yet strong. Shockingly strong, in fact. In so many of these psychological thrillers, the protagonist is such a mess, but Gemma was not that way. And for that reason, it was easy to put yourself in her place. To imagine what would happen if you were forced to keep a secret from those you love most, in part because you’re not entirely sure about what the secret is!
I want to thank the author Mary Torjussen for facilitating this Advanced Reader Copy for review. I also want to thank Berkley and NetGalley for allowing me to review this book honestly and fairly. I actually kept my pre-order active because I know I'll want a physical copy of the book to have for use with my reading circles!
See my review here: http://novelbutnice.blogspot.com/2018...
I am a big fan of Mary Torjussen’s last book Gone Without a Trace. As a psychologist, I always find books that deal with the character’s mindset effectively to be so compelling, and this is an area Mary really excels in as an author. This book was one I read in two days (which, for someone who works full-time and has a dissertation to write is quite an endorsement). The steady building of suspense in this book had the reader feeling slightly off-kilter along with the protagonist—and that is what made it so hard to put down! I found myself skipping my lunch break to read a bit more, and turning down plans for drinks after work because I had to know what would happen next!
Plot
Gemma owns her own real estate business and loves her career. She has a wonderful husband and a beautiful son, but she also has some darkness in her past. Though Gemma loves her husband and they agreed for him to stay home with their young son while she builds her business, she finds herself occasionally resenting the time he gets with their son. But Gemma would never do anything to jeopardize the family she loves so much.
Until one day, Gemma is out with a client for dinner, and the next thing she knows she wakes up alone in her hotel room with no memory of the night and a blistering hangover… Gemma would never cheat on her husband, but she can’t seem to remember the events of the evening. Sure, she used to be a heavy drinker, but that is in her past, isn’t it?
As Gemma tries to shake off the sense of unease she had that fateful night, she begins getting reminders in the mail. First, she receives a receipt from that night. But why would the hotel mail her a copy of her receipt? Then, she gets a photo of her kissing someone who is not her husband in the hotel. As Gemma’s world begins to unravel, and the reminders get increasingly threatening, Gemma wonders if she will ever remember what happened that night, and if she does, will it be too late to save her marriage??
Reflection
Gosh—I loved this book! Though I loved Mary’s first book, there is never a guarantee that the second one will live up to the first. In fact, often it is hard for an author to write a book that lives up to what was loved about the first book—but Mary Torjussen has done it! This book was very different in terms of the plot and characters from her first book, but the writing elements I loved were still there.
The slow but steady build in suspense was masterful. At the beginning, this could have just been a book about the struggles of work and marriage. And yet, there was always the sense of unease. That sense built throughout the book until the plot burst onto the page. I found myself at about 35% in shock and horror about what was happening. I couldn’t imagine being in Gemma’s spot! What would I do??? And the memory gap was masterful. The notion throughout the book that you can almost grasp the memory, but it escapes you—that is something we can all understand, and it really added to the suspense.
I loved Gemma. She was damaged yet strong. Shockingly strong, in fact. In so many of these psychological thrillers, the protagonist is such a mess, but Gemma was not that way. And for that reason, it was easy to put yourself in her place. To imagine what would happen if you were forced to keep a secret from those you love most, in part because you’re not entirely sure about what the secret is!
I want to thank the author Mary Torjussen for facilitating this Advanced Reader Copy for review. I also want to thank Berkley and NetGalley for allowing me to review this book honestly and fairly. I actually kept my pre-order active because I know I'll want a physical copy of the book to have for use with my reading circles!
See my review here: http://novelbutnice.blogspot.com/2018...
April 20, 2018
THE GIRL I USED TO BE is a fast paced psychological thriller that sucked me in right away. Most of the book is told from main character Gemma Brogan's point of view. She's a successful real estate agent with her own firm, and supporting her stay-at-home hubby, Joe, and their young son, Rory.
Though Gemma loves her career, she feels stressed and stretched thin, and misses Rory during her long hours of work. Then a business trip to London goes terribly wrong, and now she's in danger of losing everything she holds dear. Someone is clearly out to get her, but why?
The build up of suspense in this book was well done. In addition to her present day dilemma, Gemma is still haunted by something terrible from her past and its aftermath. Gemma's desperate situation kept me glued to the pages. This is an unsettling story of blackmail, secrets, and revenge, with some great twists and emotional moments too.
Disclosure: I received a review copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
Though Gemma loves her career, she feels stressed and stretched thin, and misses Rory during her long hours of work. Then a business trip to London goes terribly wrong, and now she's in danger of losing everything she holds dear. Someone is clearly out to get her, but why?
The build up of suspense in this book was well done. In addition to her present day dilemma, Gemma is still haunted by something terrible from her past and its aftermath. Gemma's desperate situation kept me glued to the pages. This is an unsettling story of blackmail, secrets, and revenge, with some great twists and emotional moments too.
Disclosure: I received a review copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
August 20, 2018
Having thoroughly enjoyed Mary Torjussen's debut novel 'Gone Without A Trace' released in November 2016, I was eager to read this follow-up psychological thriller. Needless to say, it didn't disappoint.
The book opens with our main protagonist, Gemma, and her friend attending an end -of-year school party having passed their exams with flying colours. Gemma drinks a substantial amount of alcohol and ends up falling asleep in one of the empty bedrooms. The narrative then jumps forward by fifteen years. Gemma is now happily married to Joe and has a young son, Rory. She owns her own estate agency but needs to work all hours god sends in order for it to be worthwhile and allow her family to live a comfortable life, whilst husband Joe is a stay-at-home dad. One day a new client, David, comes into her office, and she commits to showing him around a variety of different properties herself. Gemma then takes a work trip to London for an important conference and incredulously bumps into David (what are the chances?), and they decide to go for lunch together as friends. Gemma once again drinks too much and finds that she cannot remember some of the earlier evening, a whole part of the night is missing from her memory. Was David really interested in purchasing a property or was it a way to get close to her? Who exactly is he and what does he want with her?
This is a drama-filled, suspenseful and enthralling read. I particularly loved Torjussen's writing style which was beautifully readable and flowed well. The short chapters also appealed to me and helped in ensuring this was a quick read. Gemma is a character you really care about, and you cannot help but feel for her as she ends up in almost the same situation she was in fifteen years ago, albeit through her own doing. The pace is pretty darn perfect, and there is plenty happening throughout. Some of the twists were slightly predictable, hence the reason this is a four-star read rather than five-star. However, this was so well written that it didn't affect my overall enjoyment of the novel.
Many thanks to Headline for an ARC. I was not required to post a review, and all thoughts and opinions expressed are my own.
The book opens with our main protagonist, Gemma, and her friend attending an end -of-year school party having passed their exams with flying colours. Gemma drinks a substantial amount of alcohol and ends up falling asleep in one of the empty bedrooms. The narrative then jumps forward by fifteen years. Gemma is now happily married to Joe and has a young son, Rory. She owns her own estate agency but needs to work all hours god sends in order for it to be worthwhile and allow her family to live a comfortable life, whilst husband Joe is a stay-at-home dad. One day a new client, David, comes into her office, and she commits to showing him around a variety of different properties herself. Gemma then takes a work trip to London for an important conference and incredulously bumps into David (what are the chances?), and they decide to go for lunch together as friends. Gemma once again drinks too much and finds that she cannot remember some of the earlier evening, a whole part of the night is missing from her memory. Was David really interested in purchasing a property or was it a way to get close to her? Who exactly is he and what does he want with her?
This is a drama-filled, suspenseful and enthralling read. I particularly loved Torjussen's writing style which was beautifully readable and flowed well. The short chapters also appealed to me and helped in ensuring this was a quick read. Gemma is a character you really care about, and you cannot help but feel for her as she ends up in almost the same situation she was in fifteen years ago, albeit through her own doing. The pace is pretty darn perfect, and there is plenty happening throughout. Some of the twists were slightly predictable, hence the reason this is a four-star read rather than five-star. However, this was so well written that it didn't affect my overall enjoyment of the novel.
Many thanks to Headline for an ARC. I was not required to post a review, and all thoughts and opinions expressed are my own.
September 15, 2018
Gemma runs her own Estate Agency which involves working unsociable hours. Her husband Joe stays home and looks after their son Rory, which has become a bone of contention between them as Gemma would like to spend more time with her son!!
Gemma is away for the night on a business trip for the night and has dinner with prospective client David Sanderson. The next morning she wakes up hungover, not remembering much about the night before.
The problems begin when she starts getting messages and it seems like she is being blackmailed. But why and what did happen that night?
It is an easy book to read, you can’t help but feel the despair Gemma is going through and the sheer panic of trying to carry on a semblance of normal life, while everything is crashing around her ears.
If you are into psychological thrillers then this book is for you, the scenario could have happened to any woman and you can’t help but read this thinking what would I have done if I were in this situation?
Thank you to Netgalley for my copy in exchange for a review.
April 10, 2018
After reading Gone Without A Trace last year, when I saw Mary Torjussen's new book on NetGalley I had to hit the request button. I couldn't remember, at the time, what my rating for that book was, but I do remember liking her writing style and was excited when I received the email telling me I was approved for this title.
What Torjussen does well is hooking you right from the start. Immediately you're brought right into the story until you get to Part 2, where the twist comes into play. While it's not throat punchy, it definitely does get your attention. The issue for me isn't that I expected that twist, because I certainly wasn't expecting THAT to happen. Unfortunately, by the time I got there, I had lost a tiny bit of interest. I went back to my review for Gone Without A Trace and realized it was due to the same reasons. It feels a bit repetitive at times and UFF, the husband - how ANNOYING was HE?! (Great job in making me hate this guy - 🤣.) When Part 2 comes in, then my interest gets piqued again. Where is she going to go with this? Will Gemma figure it out? Just how bad will this person go with these pictures to get to her and WHY is he doing this? All questions I need answered. We finally do get the answers ... but it's done a bit abruptly. What WAS supposed to happen at midnight? This never really got resolved. Among a few other questions I still have...
There's not doubt Torjussen brings us a fun and twisted story. This story is easy to read and perfect for those who like the lighter thriller without any out of the world twists that shake you to the core. I certainly will continue to see what she brings to the table. 🙂
★★★
**edit - thank you so much to the author who clarified what happened at midnight - it makes much more sense to me now and is actually pretty obvious in the book now that i think about it - I just somehow missed it in my reading. YES! LOVE IT
Thank you to Berkley and Netgalley for this copy in return for my honest review!
What Torjussen does well is hooking you right from the start. Immediately you're brought right into the story until you get to Part 2, where the twist comes into play. While it's not throat punchy, it definitely does get your attention. The issue for me isn't that I expected that twist, because I certainly wasn't expecting THAT to happen. Unfortunately, by the time I got there, I had lost a tiny bit of interest. I went back to my review for Gone Without A Trace and realized it was due to the same reasons. It feels a bit repetitive at times and UFF, the husband - how ANNOYING was HE?! (Great job in making me hate this guy - 🤣.) When Part 2 comes in, then my interest gets piqued again. Where is she going to go with this? Will Gemma figure it out? Just how bad will this person go with these pictures to get to her and WHY is he doing this? All questions I need answered. We finally do get the answers ... but it's done a bit abruptly. What WAS supposed to happen at midnight? This never really got resolved. Among a few other questions I still have...
There's not doubt Torjussen brings us a fun and twisted story. This story is easy to read and perfect for those who like the lighter thriller without any out of the world twists that shake you to the core. I certainly will continue to see what she brings to the table. 🙂
★★★
**edit - thank you so much to the author who clarified what happened at midnight - it makes much more sense to me now and is actually pretty obvious in the book now that i think about it - I just somehow missed it in my reading. YES! LOVE IT
Thank you to Berkley and Netgalley for this copy in return for my honest review!
May 6, 2018
In a culture where we snap pictures and videos of even the smallest and mundane parts of our lives, Mary Torjussen took that idea, that societal truth and gave it a creepy, sinister twist. Imagine yourself at a bad, maybe even indelicate moment, you want nothing more than to just forget it ever happened, and just when you start to relax someone taunts you with photographic evidence of your misdeeds. It makes me uneasy just to think about something like this happening to me and that’s basically the feeling I had while reading this.
Torjussen’s writing style has a subtle tension to it but that’s combined with quick pacing and short chapters, a combination that’s always appealing to me. This is the type of book that raises several questions and doesn’t give any solid answers until the end, the best kind in my opinion, I love to be kept on the edge of my seat.
Similar to her last book things gain traction in the last twenty five percent and I was well and truly hooked. There are some clever little plot twists throughout, nothing implausible, which is always an appreciated touch, I’m sick of twists just for the sake of having one and I felt these turns added to the story in a good way.
The Girl I Used to Be in three words: Clever, Chilling and Creepy.
Torjussen’s writing style has a subtle tension to it but that’s combined with quick pacing and short chapters, a combination that’s always appealing to me. This is the type of book that raises several questions and doesn’t give any solid answers until the end, the best kind in my opinion, I love to be kept on the edge of my seat.
Similar to her last book things gain traction in the last twenty five percent and I was well and truly hooked. There are some clever little plot twists throughout, nothing implausible, which is always an appreciated touch, I’m sick of twists just for the sake of having one and I felt these turns added to the story in a good way.
The Girl I Used to Be in three words: Clever, Chilling and Creepy.
June 3, 2018
I received this book for free from Publisher in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review.An exciting, fast-paced, page turning thriller that had me gripped until the very last page.
The book mostly follows Gemma Brogan, a hard working real estate agent that is also a mom to a little boy that she hardly get's to see. Gemma has worked hard for her business and it frustrates her that her husband is refusing to look for work and is instead a stay at home dad - something she wishes she could do.
One night while away on a work trip, Gemma runs into a prospective client, get's a little too drunk and wakes up regretting a nasty hangover. But now strange letters addressed to her's keep showing up, and Gemma must find out what happened that night and why it's happening.
This was a really quick read, it was fast paced and it had me wanting more. I liked the characters, I could sympathize with Gemma when it came to her son, and I found myself frustrated with her husband that just did not seem to get it half the time.
I thought the story and the mystery was kind of exciting and the author's writing was great. There was never really a dull moment. Thought a bit predictable in a sense, I did not find that it took away from the thrill of the story. There is an opening to the story that has you wondering how this ties into present day, so I found myself trying to put the pieces together through the book.
There seemed to have been a bit of overlooked or abandoned plot that happens with Gemma a couple of weeks after the trip that led me astray or the author decided not to go that route. Hard to explain it without giving much of it away, but if you read it and know what I am talking about, let me know if you felt the same. I got an opportunity to speak to the author about this and she clarified the plot for me, so I got to understand what the author was thinking when she wrote this part and it wasn't the direction that I thought it was going so, thank you Mary.
Overall, I think so far this is definitely the best thriller I read this year and it hit checks for me as far as what I enjoy in thrillers and I do recommend this.This review was originally posted on Night Owl Book Cafe
The book mostly follows Gemma Brogan, a hard working real estate agent that is also a mom to a little boy that she hardly get's to see. Gemma has worked hard for her business and it frustrates her that her husband is refusing to look for work and is instead a stay at home dad - something she wishes she could do.
One night while away on a work trip, Gemma runs into a prospective client, get's a little too drunk and wakes up regretting a nasty hangover. But now strange letters addressed to her's keep showing up, and Gemma must find out what happened that night and why it's happening.
This was a really quick read, it was fast paced and it had me wanting more. I liked the characters, I could sympathize with Gemma when it came to her son, and I found myself frustrated with her husband that just did not seem to get it half the time.
I thought the story and the mystery was kind of exciting and the author's writing was great. There was never really a dull moment. Thought a bit predictable in a sense, I did not find that it took away from the thrill of the story. There is an opening to the story that has you wondering how this ties into present day, so I found myself trying to put the pieces together through the book.
There seemed to have been a bit of overlooked or abandoned plot that happens with Gemma a couple of weeks after the trip that led me astray or the author decided not to go that route. Hard to explain it without giving much of it away, but if you read it and know what I am talking about, let me know if you felt the same. I got an opportunity to speak to the author about this and she clarified the plot for me, so I got to understand what the author was thinking when she wrote this part and it wasn't the direction that I thought it was going so, thank you Mary.
Overall, I think so far this is definitely the best thriller I read this year and it hit checks for me as far as what I enjoy in thrillers and I do recommend this.This review was originally posted on Night Owl Book Cafe
May 31, 2018
Oh, the horror!
I’m going to be in the minority on this one – 1.5 stars rounded up.
I’m not even sure where to start. The plot, the characters, their behaviour, and the dialogue were cringe-worthy. I would class it as contemporary fiction, with a bland mystery on the side. Slow paced, stretches of chapters where nothing happened, with twists you can see coming from space. The motivation for the protagonist’s harassment was weak in my opinion, and the harassment itself was pathetic – it neither escalated, and came across as more of a nuisance than a threat. And there wasn’t one single suspenseful moment – the entire novel was ludicrous.
The main character, Gemma, was particularly dim-witted, and boy did it take her a long time to connect the obvious dots. And for some unknown reason, she had a weird habit of creating outlandish stories to cover up small lies, lies that had little, or sometimes nothing, to do with the plot.
But the worst crime for me was the awful dialogue, which admittedly is a pet hate of mine. Much of the dialogue read as stilted and boring, and is not how people speak or relate to one another. Here’s one example;
‘I’m not working nine to five every day. Occasionally I’m working half-days. Well, more like three-quarter-days. I go in mid-morning sometimes, or finish early and then go back to lock up. Or I come home for a longer lunch’
Terrible right! Do we really need to know all that?
In another scene it is revealed that two characters are from the same hometown, which prompts a third character to ask if they knew each other back then. Fair enough question right? This is the response;
‘No,’ I said. ‘Obviously I’m older and we went to different schools.’
Eh! You could’ve met in numerous other ways. Anyhow, moving on...
Also related to the odd dialogue was the unnatural behaviour of everyone. Even though Gemma’s their boss, her employees constantly question her every small decision. Which is fine in itself, there are people like that, but what I found strange was Gemma’s reaction. Instead of reprimanding her staff, she would go into long detailed explanations to justify her reasons. In another part of the book a character arrives home and a neighbour starts grilling said character on their whereabouts the night before. Again, fair enough, nosy or suspicious neighbours are a dime a dozen, especially in this genre, but instead of politely making an exit, or telling the neighbour to mind their own business, the character decided to tell this almost complete stranger where they had been, why they were there, and how long they’d been gone. This sort of behaviour just doesn’t ring true to me, and the novel was littered with these types of interactions
As you can see I didn’t think much of it. Definitely decide for yourself, and to those that do or have enjoyed it, good on you. Wish I was in the same camp, as it sounded so good from the book summary.
I’m going to be in the minority on this one – 1.5 stars rounded up.
I’m not even sure where to start. The plot, the characters, their behaviour, and the dialogue were cringe-worthy. I would class it as contemporary fiction, with a bland mystery on the side. Slow paced, stretches of chapters where nothing happened, with twists you can see coming from space. The motivation for the protagonist’s harassment was weak in my opinion, and the harassment itself was pathetic – it neither escalated, and came across as more of a nuisance than a threat. And there wasn’t one single suspenseful moment – the entire novel was ludicrous.
The main character, Gemma, was particularly dim-witted, and boy did it take her a long time to connect the obvious dots. And for some unknown reason, she had a weird habit of creating outlandish stories to cover up small lies, lies that had little, or sometimes nothing, to do with the plot.
But the worst crime for me was the awful dialogue, which admittedly is a pet hate of mine. Much of the dialogue read as stilted and boring, and is not how people speak or relate to one another. Here’s one example;
‘I’m not working nine to five every day. Occasionally I’m working half-days. Well, more like three-quarter-days. I go in mid-morning sometimes, or finish early and then go back to lock up. Or I come home for a longer lunch’
Terrible right! Do we really need to know all that?
In another scene it is revealed that two characters are from the same hometown, which prompts a third character to ask if they knew each other back then. Fair enough question right? This is the response;
‘No,’ I said. ‘Obviously I’m older and we went to different schools.’
Eh! You could’ve met in numerous other ways. Anyhow, moving on...
Also related to the odd dialogue was the unnatural behaviour of everyone. Even though Gemma’s their boss, her employees constantly question her every small decision. Which is fine in itself, there are people like that, but what I found strange was Gemma’s reaction. Instead of reprimanding her staff, she would go into long detailed explanations to justify her reasons. In another part of the book a character arrives home and a neighbour starts grilling said character on their whereabouts the night before. Again, fair enough, nosy or suspicious neighbours are a dime a dozen, especially in this genre, but instead of politely making an exit, or telling the neighbour to mind their own business, the character decided to tell this almost complete stranger where they had been, why they were there, and how long they’d been gone. This sort of behaviour just doesn’t ring true to me, and the novel was littered with these types of interactions
As you can see I didn’t think much of it. Definitely decide for yourself, and to those that do or have enjoyed it, good on you. Wish I was in the same camp, as it sounded so good from the book summary.
October 13, 2018
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ / 5
SO MUCH YES! Full disclosure, I was not a fan of Mary Torjussen's other novel, Gone Without a Trace, but The Girl I Used to Be is amazing!
What it's about: Gemma Brogan owns her own real estate company in the UK. After taking a client out to dinner and drinking too much, she is startled to learn that there are a lot of things she can't remember from that night. When she starts being blackmailed with photos and a video of herself, she fears for her marriage... and must revisit a strong darkness from her past.
Obviously there is more to the plot than that, but that is the basis for this novel. I found the pacing was very quick, and I had a hard time putting it down. I was hooked right away, but part 2 of the book is especially where things pick up.
The problem I had with Gone Without a Trace was that I found the story became too convoluted and unbelievable, but that was not a problem here. The scary part is that I could actually see much of this book occurring IRL. There is always something happening, and I was never bored with the story. I couldn't wait to see what was going to happen next and how everything would tie together. I kind of guessed a couple of things, but for the most part I didn't find it predictable at all.
Final Thought: If you read Gone Without a Trace and didn't like it, I strongly suggest not letting that scare you away from The Girl I Used to Be. It didn't scare me away and I'm happy it didn't. I really enjoyed the pacing, storyline (as much as one can enjoy something like this), and I did find myself connecting with the characters. Recommend if you are in the mood for a fast-paced thriller, or even just a good mystery!
SO MUCH YES! Full disclosure, I was not a fan of Mary Torjussen's other novel, Gone Without a Trace, but The Girl I Used to Be is amazing!
What it's about: Gemma Brogan owns her own real estate company in the UK. After taking a client out to dinner and drinking too much, she is startled to learn that there are a lot of things she can't remember from that night. When she starts being blackmailed with photos and a video of herself, she fears for her marriage... and must revisit a strong darkness from her past.
Obviously there is more to the plot than that, but that is the basis for this novel. I found the pacing was very quick, and I had a hard time putting it down. I was hooked right away, but part 2 of the book is especially where things pick up.
The problem I had with Gone Without a Trace was that I found the story became too convoluted and unbelievable, but that was not a problem here. The scary part is that I could actually see much of this book occurring IRL. There is always something happening, and I was never bored with the story. I couldn't wait to see what was going to happen next and how everything would tie together. I kind of guessed a couple of things, but for the most part I didn't find it predictable at all.
Final Thought: If you read Gone Without a Trace and didn't like it, I strongly suggest not letting that scare you away from The Girl I Used to Be. It didn't scare me away and I'm happy it didn't. I really enjoyed the pacing, storyline (as much as one can enjoy something like this), and I did find myself connecting with the characters. Recommend if you are in the mood for a fast-paced thriller, or even just a good mystery!
April 17, 2018
The Girl I Used to Be was a solid 4. I felt very tense while I read this book wondering what would happen next. The main character, Gemma Brogan, was a likable character; although I haven’t been in her situations I could empathize with her fully and wanted the messages and packages to STOP!
Gemma Brogan owns her own real estate company while her husband stays home to care for their three year old son, Rory. This worked out perfectly in the beginning but now poor Gemma is working 7 days a week and is missing her son grow up and is starting to feel stressed and a bit resentful of her husband being the favored parent. Gemma goes to a real estate conference and stays the night before so she won’t have to rush in the morning. She is looking forward to a stress free night alone in her hotel room, until she runs into a potential client she met a few weeks prior. David is charming, easy to talk to, a potential big sale and is also saving Gemma from talking to a colleague she would rather ignore. Gemma tells one little lie to her husband, she decides to stick with the story of the quiet evening she initially planned for herself- an early night with room service and not have to explain the change of plans, a night of dinner and too many drinks with a handsome, charming, SINGLE man. I mean, really, this dinner isn’t about sexy David; it’s about wooing a potential buyer leading to a large home sale. Gemma REALLY needs the income as the sole breadwinner; this sale could take some of the stress off and let her spend more time with her son. Unfortunately, the only thing Gemma’s night bought her was a dreadful hangover the following morning and not remembering much of the night before but the hangover is nothing in comparison to the nightmare she can’t seem to get away from.
I really enjoyed this book from start to finish, and will be keeping an eye out for future reads from Mary Torjussen and going back to read her debut novel, Gone Without a Trace.
*** Thank you First to Read for providing me an ARC of The Girl I Used to Be by Mary Torjussen in exchange for my honest review.
Gemma Brogan owns her own real estate company while her husband stays home to care for their three year old son, Rory. This worked out perfectly in the beginning but now poor Gemma is working 7 days a week and is missing her son grow up and is starting to feel stressed and a bit resentful of her husband being the favored parent. Gemma goes to a real estate conference and stays the night before so she won’t have to rush in the morning. She is looking forward to a stress free night alone in her hotel room, until she runs into a potential client she met a few weeks prior. David is charming, easy to talk to, a potential big sale and is also saving Gemma from talking to a colleague she would rather ignore. Gemma tells one little lie to her husband, she decides to stick with the story of the quiet evening she initially planned for herself- an early night with room service and not have to explain the change of plans, a night of dinner and too many drinks with a handsome, charming, SINGLE man. I mean, really, this dinner isn’t about sexy David; it’s about wooing a potential buyer leading to a large home sale. Gemma REALLY needs the income as the sole breadwinner; this sale could take some of the stress off and let her spend more time with her son. Unfortunately, the only thing Gemma’s night bought her was a dreadful hangover the following morning and not remembering much of the night before but the hangover is nothing in comparison to the nightmare she can’t seem to get away from.
I really enjoyed this book from start to finish, and will be keeping an eye out for future reads from Mary Torjussen and going back to read her debut novel, Gone Without a Trace.
*** Thank you First to Read for providing me an ARC of The Girl I Used to Be by Mary Torjussen in exchange for my honest review.
May 9, 2018
I ADORED the last book I read by Mary Torjussen so I was really looking forward to picking up her new one and, as expected, I became completely gripped as soon as I started it. Mary Torjussen has a wonderfully engrossing writing style and once again I found myself unable to put this book down, reading it in one tension filled afternoon. She’s fast becoming a favourite author of mine, her books tick a lot of my boxes so to speak, and I know I’m in for a rompingly good read when I pick up her novels.
It’s always fun recognising places you know within books and Mary’s books are usually set around an area of the North West that I know well which added a nice visual touch for me. And Gemma, the main protagonist was an estate agent which was my career after I had my children, so I felt an affinity with her straight away! Owning her own agency meant a frantic, high pressured working environment which was hard on Gemma as she was the main breadwinner. Her husband stayed home to look after their son and so there was some resentment of their family situation with Gemma feeling that she was missing out on the family life that she works hard to support. When she gets the chance of some time away with some training for work, she welcomes it. But after coincidentally meeting a client at the same hotel, Gemma let’s her guard down and they have dinner together. And after that Gemma has no idea what happened until she wakes up next morning! I could feel her bewilderment and frustration flowing off the pages as Gemma struggled to find out what occurred that night and then her terror as she started to get messages and pictures from that night. Who is doing this to her? Gemma quickly realised that this is personal and she has to find out why she is being targeted before her family falls apart.
What I love about this authors books is that she manages to keep me completely in the dark about how her books are going to turn out! The prologue introduced us to a teenage Gemma who was at a party to celebrate the end of her A levels before she went to university. This was obviously important to the plot line and I thought I had an idea why but I was WAY off base! The cleverly crafted storyline weaved its way towards the shocking ending in a thoroughly engaging style that kept me entertained from start to finish. Gemma is a strong minded and likeable character that you can’t help but cheer on, even though sometimes I wanted to shout at her “what the hell are you doing?!”. She got herself into some very awkward situations and made some questionable decisions but you couldn’t help but like her.
The Girl I Used To Be is an addictive page turner that’s easy to put up but very difficult to put down. So grab a coffee and a packet of biscuits and settle down to savour this highly enjoyable read!
It’s always fun recognising places you know within books and Mary’s books are usually set around an area of the North West that I know well which added a nice visual touch for me. And Gemma, the main protagonist was an estate agent which was my career after I had my children, so I felt an affinity with her straight away! Owning her own agency meant a frantic, high pressured working environment which was hard on Gemma as she was the main breadwinner. Her husband stayed home to look after their son and so there was some resentment of their family situation with Gemma feeling that she was missing out on the family life that she works hard to support. When she gets the chance of some time away with some training for work, she welcomes it. But after coincidentally meeting a client at the same hotel, Gemma let’s her guard down and they have dinner together. And after that Gemma has no idea what happened until she wakes up next morning! I could feel her bewilderment and frustration flowing off the pages as Gemma struggled to find out what occurred that night and then her terror as she started to get messages and pictures from that night. Who is doing this to her? Gemma quickly realised that this is personal and she has to find out why she is being targeted before her family falls apart.
What I love about this authors books is that she manages to keep me completely in the dark about how her books are going to turn out! The prologue introduced us to a teenage Gemma who was at a party to celebrate the end of her A levels before she went to university. This was obviously important to the plot line and I thought I had an idea why but I was WAY off base! The cleverly crafted storyline weaved its way towards the shocking ending in a thoroughly engaging style that kept me entertained from start to finish. Gemma is a strong minded and likeable character that you can’t help but cheer on, even though sometimes I wanted to shout at her “what the hell are you doing?!”. She got herself into some very awkward situations and made some questionable decisions but you couldn’t help but like her.
The Girl I Used To Be is an addictive page turner that’s easy to put up but very difficult to put down. So grab a coffee and a packet of biscuits and settle down to savour this highly enjoyable read!
May 11, 2018
THE GIRL I USED TO BE by MARY TORJUSSEN is a great psychological thriller that didn't disappoint! It started out slow, but once it picked up I couldn't put it down! Suspenseful with a few twists and turns. A very unique story that I definitely recommend!
Many thanks to First to Read for the ARC!
Many thanks to First to Read for the ARC!
May 8, 2018
A very suspenseful, good read! Gemma is a busy woman. She is the owner of a real estate business in Chester, England. Her husband is a stay-at-home Dad to their 3 year old son.
While on a business trip to London, she encounters David, a man she had recently shown properties to and they have drinks and dinner together. Gemma drinks far too much and has little memory of what happened on that evening.
When she returns home, she begins receiving mail, phone calls, texts with pictures of herself partially nude, and
then a video. She keeps this to herself as she is fearful of her husband finding out and begins lying to him and her employees all the while wondering how to locate the man she had dinner with in London - but he is nowhere to be found. This whole episode takes her mind back to a traumatic incident she had as a teenager. The anxiety begins to take a toll on her health. Who is the blackmailer?
This was a fast paced, well written book, and I personally found the lack of profanity refreshing. There were several twists and turns which kept me on the edge of my seat.
I will definitely be reading the author's other book soon!
While on a business trip to London, she encounters David, a man she had recently shown properties to and they have drinks and dinner together. Gemma drinks far too much and has little memory of what happened on that evening.
When she returns home, she begins receiving mail, phone calls, texts with pictures of herself partially nude, and
then a video. She keeps this to herself as she is fearful of her husband finding out and begins lying to him and her employees all the while wondering how to locate the man she had dinner with in London - but he is nowhere to be found. This whole episode takes her mind back to a traumatic incident she had as a teenager. The anxiety begins to take a toll on her health. Who is the blackmailer?
This was a fast paced, well written book, and I personally found the lack of profanity refreshing. There were several twists and turns which kept me on the edge of my seat.
I will definitely be reading the author's other book soon!
May 11, 2018
"You made me what I am."
That's the thing with deception, the victim relents all the power.
This is my first Mary Torjussen novel, and I have to say, I have no regrets. I will definitely have to check out her other work, and I'm sorry that I haven't done it sooner. I kept seeing awesome reviews for this one popping up from my friends on Goodreads, so I was very intrigued and had entered the giveaway on Goodreads and put in a request on NetGalley only I didn't seem to be getting anywhere. I was very surprised and elated when Mary Torjussen herself assisted in getting me a copy of her novel.
The Girl I Used to Be is a psychological thriller that I found to be somewhat of a slow build up, but I wouldn't have it any other way. A slow build up is exactly what is needed here to bring the reader right to the edge. There's some predictability in the storyline, but there is also moments of complete surprise, so in my opinion, this creates a fine balance.
The character development was key in this novel, Mary does an excellent job of creating empathy for our protagonist, Gemma. Given her current predicament of being blackmailed, she's also dealing with the struggles of being the primary source of income for her family, and with this, it certainly creates feelings of resentment, frustration, and jealousy. One might say that our antagonist, David is a bit one-dimensional. However, I believe this is completely intentional. Then of course we have Rachel, which I have to say, the lines are blurred with how the reader is supposed to feel about Rachel. Gemma may have her fair share of baggage, but Rachel isn't exactly packing light, she has a haunting past, and it's a toss up on where your empathy will land as a reader.
This is that type of novel that leaves you wondering, "what would I do?" given the situation. Which always makes for a more interesting read in my opinion, just think of the possibilities. This is a novel driven on jealousy and deceit, two very powerful actions that have devastating consequences, so... with that said, it's no wonder it makes for a compelling read.
I want to thank NetGalley, Berkley Publishing Group, and especially Mary Torjussen for allowing me the opportunity to read this novel in exchange for my review.
That's the thing with deception, the victim relents all the power.
This is my first Mary Torjussen novel, and I have to say, I have no regrets. I will definitely have to check out her other work, and I'm sorry that I haven't done it sooner. I kept seeing awesome reviews for this one popping up from my friends on Goodreads, so I was very intrigued and had entered the giveaway on Goodreads and put in a request on NetGalley only I didn't seem to be getting anywhere. I was very surprised and elated when Mary Torjussen herself assisted in getting me a copy of her novel.
The Girl I Used to Be is a psychological thriller that I found to be somewhat of a slow build up, but I wouldn't have it any other way. A slow build up is exactly what is needed here to bring the reader right to the edge. There's some predictability in the storyline, but there is also moments of complete surprise, so in my opinion, this creates a fine balance.
The character development was key in this novel, Mary does an excellent job of creating empathy for our protagonist, Gemma. Given her current predicament of being blackmailed, she's also dealing with the struggles of being the primary source of income for her family, and with this, it certainly creates feelings of resentment, frustration, and jealousy. One might say that our antagonist, David is a bit one-dimensional. However, I believe this is completely intentional. Then of course we have Rachel, which I have to say, the lines are blurred with how the reader is supposed to feel about Rachel. Gemma may have her fair share of baggage, but Rachel isn't exactly packing light, she has a haunting past, and it's a toss up on where your empathy will land as a reader.
This is that type of novel that leaves you wondering, "what would I do?" given the situation. Which always makes for a more interesting read in my opinion, just think of the possibilities. This is a novel driven on jealousy and deceit, two very powerful actions that have devastating consequences, so... with that said, it's no wonder it makes for a compelling read.
I want to thank NetGalley, Berkley Publishing Group, and especially Mary Torjussen for allowing me the opportunity to read this novel in exchange for my review.
April 24, 2018
Thanks to Berkley Pub for the advanced copy in exchange for my honest review!
Last year I read Torjussen's novel, GONE WITHOUT A TRACE, and I was really excited to see that she had another one coming out this year! Naturally, I had to request it on Netgalley. This one is more on the lighter side of the thriller genre, but still had a great pacing to it.
Gemma Brogan is a real estate agent and wakes up one morning with an awful hangover. Why did she drink so much the night before with a prospective client? Her regrets begin to deepen when she starts receiving mementos in the form of photos, videos, and more from that night depicting some unsavory things that can put her marriage at risk. She doesn't remember any of the events from that night. With the blackmailing continuing, her paranoia causes her life to spiral. With her past creeping up on her she realizes that she can't always outrun those events.
I've always loved a good stalker thriller. The blackmailing and mystery of who it could be is always fun and adds to the suspense. You hit Part 2 in the novel and you get the twist which I definitely wasn't expecting. It was nothing earth shattering like you might come to expect in the thriller genre, but remember, this is on the lighter side. I love when a twist happens that you don't see coming!
There are so many questions that keep you turning the pages until the very end. I love Torjussen's writing style and I will definitely be picking up more from her in the future.
I give this one 4/5 stars!
Last year I read Torjussen's novel, GONE WITHOUT A TRACE, and I was really excited to see that she had another one coming out this year! Naturally, I had to request it on Netgalley. This one is more on the lighter side of the thriller genre, but still had a great pacing to it.
Gemma Brogan is a real estate agent and wakes up one morning with an awful hangover. Why did she drink so much the night before with a prospective client? Her regrets begin to deepen when she starts receiving mementos in the form of photos, videos, and more from that night depicting some unsavory things that can put her marriage at risk. She doesn't remember any of the events from that night. With the blackmailing continuing, her paranoia causes her life to spiral. With her past creeping up on her she realizes that she can't always outrun those events.
I've always loved a good stalker thriller. The blackmailing and mystery of who it could be is always fun and adds to the suspense. You hit Part 2 in the novel and you get the twist which I definitely wasn't expecting. It was nothing earth shattering like you might come to expect in the thriller genre, but remember, this is on the lighter side. I love when a twist happens that you don't see coming!
There are so many questions that keep you turning the pages until the very end. I love Torjussen's writing style and I will definitely be picking up more from her in the future.
I give this one 4/5 stars!
May 5, 2018
I loved her first story and didn't think she'd top that but I enjoyed this one even more. It was well worth the wait....I was very impatient for its release as I preordered it last April for a November release and then it got put back 6 months !! I was gutted !
I did get pretty irritated by Gemma, our victim, at times. A lot of her issues were down to her own actions. She had everything, really. She was one of these women who wanted a baby and then wanted her career as well, so hubby was a stay-at-home dad. Then she did nothing but bleat about not seeing her son enough. Women's Lib has a lot to answer for, I think.....anyway, she did get my back up a few times. I did get a little tired by how often she was tired as well. The story's a real pageturner, though, trust me, and there are plenty of shockers along the way. So very cleverly done.
There was an oft-repeated error I wondered at. She kept writing "an flat" as opposed to "a flat". Quite surprised that got through any editing process. She's gone with American spelling throughout, too. Just once she added a set of needless speechmarks but again, her presentation is pretty much flawless.
At one point Gemma's advised not to click on a link in an email she received but to type it into the address line herself. I assumed that was a security tip but I've not heard of that before. Perhaps someone reading this review might know ? She also mentioned wakes being held before funerals whereas I always thought they were afterwards.
I laughed aloud at the mention of watercolour paints and also got a kick out of the spa game. I will be looking forward to her next book, although need to resign myself to a long wait now.
I did get pretty irritated by Gemma, our victim, at times. A lot of her issues were down to her own actions. She had everything, really. She was one of these women who wanted a baby and then wanted her career as well, so hubby was a stay-at-home dad. Then she did nothing but bleat about not seeing her son enough. Women's Lib has a lot to answer for, I think.....anyway, she did get my back up a few times. I did get a little tired by how often she was tired as well. The story's a real pageturner, though, trust me, and there are plenty of shockers along the way. So very cleverly done.
There was an oft-repeated error I wondered at. She kept writing "an flat" as opposed to "a flat". Quite surprised that got through any editing process. She's gone with American spelling throughout, too. Just once she added a set of needless speechmarks but again, her presentation is pretty much flawless.
At one point Gemma's advised not to click on a link in an email she received but to type it into the address line herself. I assumed that was a security tip but I've not heard of that before. Perhaps someone reading this review might know ? She also mentioned wakes being held before funerals whereas I always thought they were afterwards.
I laughed aloud at the mention of watercolour paints and also got a kick out of the spa game. I will be looking forward to her next book, although need to resign myself to a long wait now.
Read
April 24, 2018Fifteen years ago, Gemma went to a party with her classmates to celebrate exam results. The next day, she was not the girl she used to be.
Flash forward to present day in this work of psychological fiction. Gemma is married to Joe and they have a son named Rory. She owns her own business, an estate agency, and Joe is a stay-at-home carer for their child. Gemma works all the time trying to make a go of her business and has several employees. She doesn't think anything of David Sanderson when he comes into the office wanting to be shown some properties and she takes him around but he doesn't buy anything. When Gemma meets him later when she is out of town at a conference, it seems natural for her to offer to buy him dinner -- after all, it's business and he is a client so she can write it off. Great conversation and two bottles of wine later, Emma barely makes it to her room before passing out. Her hangover the next day is fierce. She returns home and gets back to work. It's then that the trouble begins -- in the form of a copy of the restaurant bill sent in the mail. More incriminating pieces are sent and Gemma knows that she can lose everything if her husband finds out that she has not been truthful. NO SPOILERS.
The reader experiences the tension as the blackmailing escalates and Gemma is in a state of anxiety not knowing what to do. Of course we want her to just TELL JOE already, and go to police and figure out what is going on, but Gemma has her own way of doing things and wants to figure out who is behind this and why. It was an easy, fast read and the conclusion was satisfying and it all turns out the way you would expect.
Thank you to NetGalley and Berkley Publishing Group for the e-book ARC to read and review.
Flash forward to present day in this work of psychological fiction. Gemma is married to Joe and they have a son named Rory. She owns her own business, an estate agency, and Joe is a stay-at-home carer for their child. Gemma works all the time trying to make a go of her business and has several employees. She doesn't think anything of David Sanderson when he comes into the office wanting to be shown some properties and she takes him around but he doesn't buy anything. When Gemma meets him later when she is out of town at a conference, it seems natural for her to offer to buy him dinner -- after all, it's business and he is a client so she can write it off. Great conversation and two bottles of wine later, Emma barely makes it to her room before passing out. Her hangover the next day is fierce. She returns home and gets back to work. It's then that the trouble begins -- in the form of a copy of the restaurant bill sent in the mail. More incriminating pieces are sent and Gemma knows that she can lose everything if her husband finds out that she has not been truthful. NO SPOILERS.
The reader experiences the tension as the blackmailing escalates and Gemma is in a state of anxiety not knowing what to do. Of course we want her to just TELL JOE already, and go to police and figure out what is going on, but Gemma has her own way of doing things and wants to figure out who is behind this and why. It was an easy, fast read and the conclusion was satisfying and it all turns out the way you would expect.
Thank you to NetGalley and Berkley Publishing Group for the e-book ARC to read and review.
September 23, 2019
Gemma Brogan, in her late twenties, is married and the mother of a three-year-old son, Rory. She owns and runs her own estate agency in Chester, England. Life is pretty good, though she laments not having more time to spend with her son. The real estate business is not as successful as it once was due to a downturn in the economy - therefore she spends every spare minute at the office. She is the breadwinner of the family because Joe is a 'house husband' who stays at home to care for their young son.
Gemma met her husband Joe via her best friend Caitlin. Joe is Caitlin's elder brother.
"The only people I wanted to talk to were the ones who mustn't know what was going on."
Because of this interpersonal dynamic, Gemma feels that she has no one to talk to once she realizes that she is being blackmailed... Instead she tells lie after lie - sinking herself into a situation that becomes untenable.
MY THOUGHTS
I had high expectations of this novel after reading Mary Torjussen's "Gone Without A Trace" back in 2017. That book was a five star read for me and I anticipated another stellar story. Sadly, this novel did not live up to its predecessor in my humble opinion.
Although Gemma Brogan WAS the victim in the story, I just couldn't warm to her. I found her to be self-centered, whingy, naive, and just a tad imprudent. Her behavior, and the behavior of some of the other characters just didn't seem plausible.
I quite liked the Chester setting.
The story did have enough plot twists to please the thriller lovers who appreciate them. I personally just thought that they were ever so slightly 'over the top'. Also, oftentimes, I found that the character's reactions to events in the plot were just not believable. The internal dialogue of the protagonist was repetitive and I longed for her to 'grow a pair'.
In short, I would recommend this thriller with some reservations. The reader should be able to suspend belief and not take the logic of the story too seriously. This is a novel of secrets, lies, betrayals and revenge.
The ending was neatly tied up - but again, I found it to be implausible. I realize I am in the minority when it comes to my opinions of this book, so I urge you to read it and make your own decisions.
I received a complimentary digital copy of this novel from Berkley/Penguin Random House via Edelweiss.
Gemma met her husband Joe via her best friend Caitlin. Joe is Caitlin's elder brother.
"The only people I wanted to talk to were the ones who mustn't know what was going on."
Because of this interpersonal dynamic, Gemma feels that she has no one to talk to once she realizes that she is being blackmailed... Instead she tells lie after lie - sinking herself into a situation that becomes untenable.
MY THOUGHTS
I had high expectations of this novel after reading Mary Torjussen's "Gone Without A Trace" back in 2017. That book was a five star read for me and I anticipated another stellar story. Sadly, this novel did not live up to its predecessor in my humble opinion.
Although Gemma Brogan WAS the victim in the story, I just couldn't warm to her. I found her to be self-centered, whingy, naive, and just a tad imprudent. Her behavior, and the behavior of some of the other characters just didn't seem plausible.
I quite liked the Chester setting.
The story did have enough plot twists to please the thriller lovers who appreciate them. I personally just thought that they were ever so slightly 'over the top'. Also, oftentimes, I found that the character's reactions to events in the plot were just not believable. The internal dialogue of the protagonist was repetitive and I longed for her to 'grow a pair'.
In short, I would recommend this thriller with some reservations. The reader should be able to suspend belief and not take the logic of the story too seriously. This is a novel of secrets, lies, betrayals and revenge.
The ending was neatly tied up - but again, I found it to be implausible. I realize I am in the minority when it comes to my opinions of this book, so I urge you to read it and make your own decisions.
I received a complimentary digital copy of this novel from Berkley/Penguin Random House via Edelweiss.
April 9, 2018
I have never read a book by Mary Torjussen but I am a fan now! I always know a psychological thriller is good when I can’t forget the characters and I don’t want to put the book down. Sometimes I dream about the characters. In The Girl I Used To Be, Gemma Brogman and her husband Joe have a little boy Rory. Joe is a stay-at-home-Dad while Gemma works long hours, seven days a week as a real estate agent. One day Gemma shows a nice looking man (David) a few apartments. Then she heads to London a few days/weeks later for a conference and who is in the restaurant of the hotel but David. He walks her to her room since she is super tipsy and she wakes in the morning not remembering the night before. She soon starts receiving weird messages and photos that she doesn’t remember being taken. Who is blackmailing her? And who is this David?
Part one of the book moves along smoothly with small things happening. We learn about Gemma and her husband and we meet her co-workers. We know Gemma is not happy that Joe stays home all the time now and wishes he would go back to work so she could take some time off to spend with Rory. We learn that Joe wants to get out more with his friends and I think he secretly is jealous of Gemma that she is out all the time. Part two really kick up the psychological warfare and reveals what is really happening. I had a very hard time putting this book down. I wanted a stormy day so I could curl up on the couch and read it in one sitting. I will be recommending this book to all my friends and family who enjoy a good psychological thriller.
Part one of the book moves along smoothly with small things happening. We learn about Gemma and her husband and we meet her co-workers. We know Gemma is not happy that Joe stays home all the time now and wishes he would go back to work so she could take some time off to spend with Rory. We learn that Joe wants to get out more with his friends and I think he secretly is jealous of Gemma that she is out all the time. Part two really kick up the psychological warfare and reveals what is really happening. I had a very hard time putting this book down. I wanted a stormy day so I could curl up on the couch and read it in one sitting. I will be recommending this book to all my friends and family who enjoy a good psychological thriller.
May 5, 2018
Not terrible but not great either. Dialogue felt unrealistic and there were a few things here and there that just weren’t right. Overall the story was predictable but okay
June 4, 2018
Que up a married woman who's overcome a secret past. Now a successful businesswoman, she's "taken advantage of" by a shady character who's now sending mysterious messages and demeaning photos. She can't go to the police, nor trust any of her friends to stay mum, because her husband might find out. And if he does, it's for sure he'll immediately stop loving her and take away the young son she loves so much. Instead, she decides to handle everything all by herself - meaning that she must up the ante on her lies until the muck threatens to bury her kneecaps.
Stop me if you've read this one before.
I have - several times. In fact, it's not all that different from the author's first book, Gone Without a Trace. Although both are well written (which, for the record, is why I'm quite comfortable awarding 4 stars), I can't say I was fond of any of the characters in either book.
Here's how it goes: After moving on from her teenage trauma, Gemma Brogan is married to a stay-at-home husband, has a young son named Rory and owns a real estate firm in England. The real estate industry is slowing, though, and to her growing dismay, Gemma's husband Joe just doesn't seem interested in finding a job to boost their income and allow her to slow down her own work pace. The at-home resentment builds, and then Gemma takes an overnight trip to an industry conference where, by her own admission, she gets thoroughly drunk. She can't recall much of what happened, but she knows it was nothing good when she gets an explicit photo and a few other telling messages. To her credit, she does speak with a policewoman, but the discussion never goes anywhere because, remember, she's terrified that someone might find out.
And that's where I pretty much tuned out. As I emphasized in my review of the author's first book, I've got zero tolerance for whining, paranoid females who, instead of taking charge, keep digging their own holes deeper (and, as my late mother was fond of saying, don't "have the sense God gave a little gosling.") That said, I kept at it, mostly because I'd accepted an advance copy in exchange for an honest review and simply won't go back on my word.
And in the end, honestly, I'm quite sure those who don't share my dislike of wimpy "heroines" will enjoy this book. It hits all the requisite high notes to qualify as a psychological thriller, serves up twists, turns and surprises - at least for those who haven't traveled this road before - and even comes with what I call a Robert Browning ending ("God's in His Heaven, all's right with the world"). For all of you, then, what's not to like? Go for it!
Stop me if you've read this one before.
I have - several times. In fact, it's not all that different from the author's first book, Gone Without a Trace. Although both are well written (which, for the record, is why I'm quite comfortable awarding 4 stars), I can't say I was fond of any of the characters in either book.
Here's how it goes: After moving on from her teenage trauma, Gemma Brogan is married to a stay-at-home husband, has a young son named Rory and owns a real estate firm in England. The real estate industry is slowing, though, and to her growing dismay, Gemma's husband Joe just doesn't seem interested in finding a job to boost their income and allow her to slow down her own work pace. The at-home resentment builds, and then Gemma takes an overnight trip to an industry conference where, by her own admission, she gets thoroughly drunk. She can't recall much of what happened, but she knows it was nothing good when she gets an explicit photo and a few other telling messages. To her credit, she does speak with a policewoman, but the discussion never goes anywhere because, remember, she's terrified that someone might find out.
And that's where I pretty much tuned out. As I emphasized in my review of the author's first book, I've got zero tolerance for whining, paranoid females who, instead of taking charge, keep digging their own holes deeper (and, as my late mother was fond of saying, don't "have the sense God gave a little gosling.") That said, I kept at it, mostly because I'd accepted an advance copy in exchange for an honest review and simply won't go back on my word.
And in the end, honestly, I'm quite sure those who don't share my dislike of wimpy "heroines" will enjoy this book. It hits all the requisite high notes to qualify as a psychological thriller, serves up twists, turns and surprises - at least for those who haven't traveled this road before - and even comes with what I call a Robert Browning ending ("God's in His Heaven, all's right with the world"). For all of you, then, what's not to like? Go for it!
July 28, 2018
This is a psychological thriller that is hard to put to down. Gemma is the breadwinner of her family while her husband is a stay at home dad. Suddenly she is being harassed by private messages and letters so she’s gotta figure out who’s sending her those messages. There’s many twists and turns throughout and a few i saw coming, a few i did not. This is my 2nd book I’ve read by Mary Torjussen and i gave her book “Gone Without A Trace” 5 stars!!
March 28, 2018
WOW! WOW! WOW!
This book took only a short time for me to really get interested in it. And, when it took off, WOW!, it took me on a whirlwind of a story.
There were so many plot twists, the author should be looking to some whiplash lawsuits. HA! JK
Seriously, I am still shaking, thinking that dude could be out. He's evil incarnate.
I do have to say, this was the second book by this author that I have read. I went back and read my review on the first one and remembered the book. I do remember Hannah getting on my nerves, a lot. However, I can say that I will remember this one for it's plot twists and just the overall suspense that I lived in while reading the book.
Don't start this book at bedtime!
Thanks to Penguin Random House First to Read program for providing me with a free e-galley in exchange for an honest, unbiased review.
This book took only a short time for me to really get interested in it. And, when it took off, WOW!, it took me on a whirlwind of a story.
There were so many plot twists, the author should be looking to some whiplash lawsuits. HA! JK
Seriously, I am still shaking, thinking that dude could be out. He's evil incarnate.
I do have to say, this was the second book by this author that I have read. I went back and read my review on the first one and remembered the book. I do remember Hannah getting on my nerves, a lot. However, I can say that I will remember this one for it's plot twists and just the overall suspense that I lived in while reading the book.
Don't start this book at bedtime!
Thanks to Penguin Random House First to Read program for providing me with a free e-galley in exchange for an honest, unbiased review.
April 23, 2018
Gemma Brogan works non-stop to make her real estate company a success. Her husband is a stay-at-home dad, which is a help to Gemma’s career but she wants more time with their son. She begins to resent her husband not working and the amount of time he spends with their son. However, there’s not much she can do about that now. She’s the one bringing in the money.
Then, during a work conference she meets with a client and has a bit too much to drink. She complains about her husband and she shares a kiss with the client. Gemma had so much to drink that she doesn’t remember any of it. When she receives a photo and video of the evening, she panics. Her marriage had enough problems, she didn’t need something she doesn’t even remember. It’s not long before she realizes, this situation is much more indepth than she suspects. It goes way back to a horrible event that occurred fifteen years ago. An event that left permanent scars.
This is a gripping story that keeps you on your toes. It’s about a woman trying to get on with her life after a tragic teenage event nearly destroyed her. It’s about a couple trying to come up with a fair way to raise their son and make their financial situation doable. It’s also a tale about revenge and betrayal. Thanks to annonymous threats, it’s also about a woman who becomes paranoid. Her life is torn apart.
The Girl I Used To Be is captivating to say the least. I enjoyed trying to untangle the webs of the story Gemma and others in her life created. The characters are well-written and vividly portrayed.
It is a full length novel, but I sped right through it. I had to know what was going to happen next. I am definitely going to check out this author’s backlist and keep her on my “must read” author list. She had my attention from page one and never let me go. Great job!
FTC Disclosure: I voluntarily reviewed an Advance Reader Copy of this book from NetGalley and the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review. All opinions expressed are my own.
Then, during a work conference she meets with a client and has a bit too much to drink. She complains about her husband and she shares a kiss with the client. Gemma had so much to drink that she doesn’t remember any of it. When she receives a photo and video of the evening, she panics. Her marriage had enough problems, she didn’t need something she doesn’t even remember. It’s not long before she realizes, this situation is much more indepth than she suspects. It goes way back to a horrible event that occurred fifteen years ago. An event that left permanent scars.
This is a gripping story that keeps you on your toes. It’s about a woman trying to get on with her life after a tragic teenage event nearly destroyed her. It’s about a couple trying to come up with a fair way to raise their son and make their financial situation doable. It’s also a tale about revenge and betrayal. Thanks to annonymous threats, it’s also about a woman who becomes paranoid. Her life is torn apart.
The Girl I Used To Be is captivating to say the least. I enjoyed trying to untangle the webs of the story Gemma and others in her life created. The characters are well-written and vividly portrayed.
It is a full length novel, but I sped right through it. I had to know what was going to happen next. I am definitely going to check out this author’s backlist and keep her on my “must read” author list. She had my attention from page one and never let me go. Great job!
FTC Disclosure: I voluntarily reviewed an Advance Reader Copy of this book from NetGalley and the publisher. I was not required to write a positive review. All opinions expressed are my own.
August 6, 2018
Her life is filed with hope and promise, until…
An aura of menace is subtle but persistent, and I am wondering how far HE will go in her psychological torture.
I really don’t like Joe very much. I think he’s a bit lazy and selfish, though Anne needs to make her needs know. The longer you wait to solve a probe the less the other person understands why you feel the way you do. Communicate people! lol
Not sure what I was expecting, but the tangled web Mary Torjussen weaves makes it hard to put the book down. The damaged characters all have a special role to play and are pivotal to the story.
Twisted, mess with your mind, psychological thriller.
I won the book and voluntarily reviewed The Girl I Used To Be by Mary Torjussen.
See more at fundinmental
An aura of menace is subtle but persistent, and I am wondering how far HE will go in her psychological torture.
I really don’t like Joe very much. I think he’s a bit lazy and selfish, though Anne needs to make her needs know. The longer you wait to solve a probe the less the other person understands why you feel the way you do. Communicate people! lol
Not sure what I was expecting, but the tangled web Mary Torjussen weaves makes it hard to put the book down. The damaged characters all have a special role to play and are pivotal to the story.
Twisted, mess with your mind, psychological thriller.
I won the book and voluntarily reviewed The Girl I Used To Be by Mary Torjussen.
See more at fundinmental
December 11, 2018
Gemma Brogan is a successful entrepreneur running her own real estate agency. When she meets a former client at a bar, she accepts his dinner offer and gets properly sloshed.
The next day, she remembers nothing and promptly puts it out of her mind.
Soon, incriminating photos and a salacious video of her in an uncompromising position begin to arrive, driving her to distraction and anxiety.
When she discovers the person behind the harassment is related to a tragedy she set in motion over two decades ago, she eventually realizes she made a terrible mistake and seeks to correct it but is it too late?
** Minor spoilers ahead **
First, let's start with how irritating Gemma is. The writing is passive and slow and readers are inundated with the minutia of her daily work days. Yawn.
She claims never to drink yet does so with a client. Why? Because he's handsome? Oh, that excuse again.
Gemme also loves to repeat herself. After that fateful night, she repeats ad nauseam how she will never drink again.
Gemma is also an idiot. It takes her a loooonnnnggggg time to piece the clues together and figure out how she is being harassed.
It literally takes her until the middle of the book before she says, "Oh, someone is out to get me!"
Not only is the pace and writing tedious and boring, the harassment wasn't nearly as bad as some of the horrible things I've read about in the news. It was pretty low key and lacked maliciousness and pure evil.
But the cherry on top is the really horrible, unrealistic dialogue Gemma and everyone spouts here. It's just corny and phony and hilariously fake. No one talks like this in real life.
The Girl I Used to Be was a total waste of time. I was not the girl I used to be before I read this.
The next day, she remembers nothing and promptly puts it out of her mind.
Soon, incriminating photos and a salacious video of her in an uncompromising position begin to arrive, driving her to distraction and anxiety.
When she discovers the person behind the harassment is related to a tragedy she set in motion over two decades ago, she eventually realizes she made a terrible mistake and seeks to correct it but is it too late?
** Minor spoilers ahead **
First, let's start with how irritating Gemma is. The writing is passive and slow and readers are inundated with the minutia of her daily work days. Yawn.
She claims never to drink yet does so with a client. Why? Because he's handsome? Oh, that excuse again.
Gemme also loves to repeat herself. After that fateful night, she repeats ad nauseam how she will never drink again.
Gemma is also an idiot. It takes her a loooonnnnggggg time to piece the clues together and figure out how she is being harassed.
It literally takes her until the middle of the book before she says, "Oh, someone is out to get me!"
Not only is the pace and writing tedious and boring, the harassment wasn't nearly as bad as some of the horrible things I've read about in the news. It was pretty low key and lacked maliciousness and pure evil.
But the cherry on top is the really horrible, unrealistic dialogue Gemma and everyone spouts here. It's just corny and phony and hilariously fake. No one talks like this in real life.
The Girl I Used to Be was a total waste of time. I was not the girl I used to be before I read this.
December 26, 2017
This is the story of a woman, Gemma, being harassed by someone after a relatively innocent dinner with a male client. She doesn't let her husband, Joe, know because she lied about what she was doing the night of the dinner. One lie leads to another until she's drowning in lies while still facing exposure by the man threatening her. The characters were believable, and I had a hard time putting the book down. There weren't any unexpected plot twists, it was pretty easy to see where the story was taking the reader, but I still enjoyed the character interaction. I gave the book 5 stars because it held my interest throughout and the characters were true to life.
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