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An Ocean Without a Shore
A wildly entertaining and occasionally heartbreaking story of frustrated longing, and the lengths we will go for those we love—even if they don’t love us in return
An Ocean Without a Shore, from the bestselling, critically acclaimed author of Endless Love and Man in the Woods, is a beautifully rendered exploration of that most timeless of human dilemmas: the one in which your love is left unreturned.
Since their college days, Kip Woods has been infatuated with Thaddeus Kaufman, who, years later, is a married father of two children and desperately trying to revive a failing career. Kip’s devotion to Thaddeus has been life-defining and destiny-altering, but it has been one that Thaddeus has either failed to notice or refused to acknowledge. But over the course of this heated and mesmerizing novel, set against a background of privilege and affluence in Manhattan and the Hudson Valley, Kip will be forced to reckon with the prison of his own making and decide how much he is willing to sacrifice for a love that may never be shared.
Picking up where his most recent novel, River Under the Road, left off, but writing squarely in the vein of Endless Love, his classic novel of passion and obsession, Scott Spencer gives us an intimate, immersive, and unsettling portrait of the devastation we will wreak in the name of love, and the bitterness of a friendship ravaged by fathomless yearning.
An Ocean Without a Shore, from the bestselling, critically acclaimed author of Endless Love and Man in the Woods, is a beautifully rendered exploration of that most timeless of human dilemmas: the one in which your love is left unreturned.
Since their college days, Kip Woods has been infatuated with Thaddeus Kaufman, who, years later, is a married father of two children and desperately trying to revive a failing career. Kip’s devotion to Thaddeus has been life-defining and destiny-altering, but it has been one that Thaddeus has either failed to notice or refused to acknowledge. But over the course of this heated and mesmerizing novel, set against a background of privilege and affluence in Manhattan and the Hudson Valley, Kip will be forced to reckon with the prison of his own making and decide how much he is willing to sacrifice for a love that may never be shared.
Picking up where his most recent novel, River Under the Road, left off, but writing squarely in the vein of Endless Love, his classic novel of passion and obsession, Scott Spencer gives us an intimate, immersive, and unsettling portrait of the devastation we will wreak in the name of love, and the bitterness of a friendship ravaged by fathomless yearning.
352 pages, Hardcover
First published June 16, 2020
44 people are currently reading
2525 people want to read
About the author
Scott Spencer
15 books254 followersScott Spencer (b. 1945) is the critically acclaimed, bestselling author of ten novels, including Endless Love and A Ship Made of Paper, both of which have been nominated for the National Book Award. Two of his books, Endless Love and Waking the Dead, have been adapted into films.
He has taught at Columbia University, the University of Iowa, and Williams College, and Bard College's Bard Prison Initiative. Spencer is an alumnus of Roosevelt University. In 2004, he was the recipient of a John S. Guggenheim Fellowship. For the past twenty years, he has lived in a small town in upstate New York.
Spencer has also worked as a journalist. He has published in The New York Times, The New Yorker, Harper's Magazine, GQ, O, The Oprah Magazine, and he is a regular contributor to Rolling Stone.
He has taught at Columbia University, the University of Iowa, and Williams College, and Bard College's Bard Prison Initiative. Spencer is an alumnus of Roosevelt University. In 2004, he was the recipient of a John S. Guggenheim Fellowship. For the past twenty years, he has lived in a small town in upstate New York.
Spencer has also worked as a journalist. He has published in The New York Times, The New Yorker, Harper's Magazine, GQ, O, The Oprah Magazine, and he is a regular contributor to Rolling Stone.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 124 reviews
December 19, 2019
An Ocean Without A Shore”, will be released in June, 2020.
If you have read and liked other books by Scott Spencer, there is a strong chance, you’ll like this book too. If you’re new to Spencer ....and you like this blurbs book description — chances are it will be a great pick choice.
I like Scott Spencer. ( still wanting to read other books I’ve missed).
It feels like Spencer’s books are talking to me. There’s an honestly and presence that keeps me very involved with the characters - conversations- and the issues at hand.
.....Kip Woods was a gay man in love with his friend, Thaddeus Kaufman, who was married with two children. Every morning when Kip ( real name is Christopher), woke up, he thought about Thaddeus... which often meant imagining him with his wife Grace.
Thaddeus needed money. He turned to Kip.
The following conversation takes place early in the story....a dinner gathering with a gay couple - Morris and Robbie and Kip.
They are talking about Thaddeus.
Thaddeus is the nephew of Morris. Uncle Morris remembers Thaddeus’s childhood and his mother, Libby.
“But why would he continue to live in a house he can’t afford? Why would someone do that? And why would he make it someone else’s problem?”
“Honestly, Kip. There’s something off here. Something strange. And that house of theirs is really strange”.
“But think of it, think of what happened to them. Their child. Their little girl. Dead at six months. Life‘s most hideous catastrophe. They blamed everyone. The doctors, the hospital. Libby actually blamed me, even though I’m a thousand miles away, still I should’ve done something. Anything. And they both blame Thaddeus because he was a smiley-faced four-year-old little boy who committed the cardinal sin of surviving. Shame on him for surviving, shame on him for cracking jokes and doing little dances to make them happy. So what does that leave for our Thaddeus?
“A life of trying to please people who can never be pleased? That’s his legacy. Our parents tell us who we are. That’s what they do, even if they don’t know they’re doing it. They tell us who we are”.
“I think it’s sad, sad Robbie”.
“Of course it’s sad, sad Morris. But that kind of damage can create dangerous people. I see this in my practice all the time. I have watched so many people grow up. I see them from the very beginning. I know how it works. It’s not a theory, it’s observation. I see them bleed and I see them heal. And then a little later I see the scar tissue. Scar tissue. And what is it that distinguishes scar tissue from undamage skin? Lack of feeling, lack of nerve cells. It’s just a covering”.
“I feel sorry for him, I do. He was a tender kid who was not treated at all tenderly. Not beaten or starved, but tolerated. It was appalling. And now we see the result.”
Kip gave Thaddeus a check for $130,00. He believed - hoped Thaddeus and Grace had troubles in their marriage.
Kip also believed that without a career to strive for, Grace needed some kind of adventure in her life.
“She needed drama, consequence, suspense, something to obsess about, something to hope for, something to dread, something to give her a life shape and meaning— and what easier way to achieve all that than to have an affair?”
Kip believed that Grace was capable of betraying Thaddeus. He was prepared to be wrong - but his guess was that the biological father of their child Emma was Jennings Stratton (the house caretaker).
This is one of those novels that deals tenderly and honestly with adult life, and real issues. Right away, the characters were real ‘people’ to me.
“Did Thaddeus want to be saved from a marriage to someone who kept such a foundational secret from him?
Or did he want to be saved from having to live the rest of his life without me?
Yes, it’s what I wondered, because the body is a chemistry set and the element of ego is volatile, a few drops of hope creates a compound that can overwhelm the nervous system”.
“Maybe there is no such thing as the real you, some essence that travels through a lifetime. Maybe who you are is just what you happen to be doing at any given moment. And I suppose what frightened me was not having any clear idea, or really any idea at all, what I would do next”.
I loved the authenticity- the empathy - the gray areas of friendships and love explored. Spencer created not only three dimensional characters but three dimensional relationships. The emotional entanglement and complexities were real.
This is not a big action book...rather a quiet introspective look at ways love can rip us apart...and how life long love and devotion isn’t insulated from difficulties.
Great choice pick for readers who enjoy literary fiction, art and philosophy.
Thank you to Harper Collins publishing for this early read.
If you have read and liked other books by Scott Spencer, there is a strong chance, you’ll like this book too. If you’re new to Spencer ....and you like this blurbs book description — chances are it will be a great pick choice.
I like Scott Spencer. ( still wanting to read other books I’ve missed).
It feels like Spencer’s books are talking to me. There’s an honestly and presence that keeps me very involved with the characters - conversations- and the issues at hand.
.....Kip Woods was a gay man in love with his friend, Thaddeus Kaufman, who was married with two children. Every morning when Kip ( real name is Christopher), woke up, he thought about Thaddeus... which often meant imagining him with his wife Grace.
Thaddeus needed money. He turned to Kip.
The following conversation takes place early in the story....a dinner gathering with a gay couple - Morris and Robbie and Kip.
They are talking about Thaddeus.
Thaddeus is the nephew of Morris. Uncle Morris remembers Thaddeus’s childhood and his mother, Libby.
“But why would he continue to live in a house he can’t afford? Why would someone do that? And why would he make it someone else’s problem?”
“Honestly, Kip. There’s something off here. Something strange. And that house of theirs is really strange”.
“But think of it, think of what happened to them. Their child. Their little girl. Dead at six months. Life‘s most hideous catastrophe. They blamed everyone. The doctors, the hospital. Libby actually blamed me, even though I’m a thousand miles away, still I should’ve done something. Anything. And they both blame Thaddeus because he was a smiley-faced four-year-old little boy who committed the cardinal sin of surviving. Shame on him for surviving, shame on him for cracking jokes and doing little dances to make them happy. So what does that leave for our Thaddeus?
“A life of trying to please people who can never be pleased? That’s his legacy. Our parents tell us who we are. That’s what they do, even if they don’t know they’re doing it. They tell us who we are”.
“I think it’s sad, sad Robbie”.
“Of course it’s sad, sad Morris. But that kind of damage can create dangerous people. I see this in my practice all the time. I have watched so many people grow up. I see them from the very beginning. I know how it works. It’s not a theory, it’s observation. I see them bleed and I see them heal. And then a little later I see the scar tissue. Scar tissue. And what is it that distinguishes scar tissue from undamage skin? Lack of feeling, lack of nerve cells. It’s just a covering”.
“I feel sorry for him, I do. He was a tender kid who was not treated at all tenderly. Not beaten or starved, but tolerated. It was appalling. And now we see the result.”
Kip gave Thaddeus a check for $130,00. He believed - hoped Thaddeus and Grace had troubles in their marriage.
Kip also believed that without a career to strive for, Grace needed some kind of adventure in her life.
“She needed drama, consequence, suspense, something to obsess about, something to hope for, something to dread, something to give her a life shape and meaning— and what easier way to achieve all that than to have an affair?”
Kip believed that Grace was capable of betraying Thaddeus. He was prepared to be wrong - but his guess was that the biological father of their child Emma was Jennings Stratton (the house caretaker).
This is one of those novels that deals tenderly and honestly with adult life, and real issues. Right away, the characters were real ‘people’ to me.
“Did Thaddeus want to be saved from a marriage to someone who kept such a foundational secret from him?
Or did he want to be saved from having to live the rest of his life without me?
Yes, it’s what I wondered, because the body is a chemistry set and the element of ego is volatile, a few drops of hope creates a compound that can overwhelm the nervous system”.
“Maybe there is no such thing as the real you, some essence that travels through a lifetime. Maybe who you are is just what you happen to be doing at any given moment. And I suppose what frightened me was not having any clear idea, or really any idea at all, what I would do next”.
I loved the authenticity- the empathy - the gray areas of friendships and love explored. Spencer created not only three dimensional characters but three dimensional relationships. The emotional entanglement and complexities were real.
This is not a big action book...rather a quiet introspective look at ways love can rip us apart...and how life long love and devotion isn’t insulated from difficulties.
Great choice pick for readers who enjoy literary fiction, art and philosophy.
Thank you to Harper Collins publishing for this early read.
August 27, 2021
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An Ocean Without a Shore surprised me. In the very first page our narrator, Kip Woods, informs us that he's awaiting his 'sentence'. Occasionally addressing his listeners/readers directly ('Your Honor' and 'the Court') he recounts the events that led to his present circumstances.
Set in late nineties, An Ocean Without a Shore follows Kip, a gay man in his forties who works at a small investment firm and has been in love with his best friend since their college days. Thaddeus Kaufman, married with children, owns a property he can't afford and as a persona non grata in Hollywood is struggling to succeed as a scriptwriter. When Thaddeus' latest writing effort bear no fruit, he finds himself in need of a bailout, so he gives Kip a call. Lucky for him, Kip is always read, and more than willing, to help.
There is much to be admired in the novel. Scott Spencer high-register prose is striking. I was dazzled by Kip's vocabulary, his expressive descriptions, and his long moments of introspections. Spencer beautifully renders Kip's many feelings and thoughts, hinting at his underlining loneliness, vibrantly rendering his desire for Thaddeus. There is yearning, resentment, and sorrow. Kip is a private and remote person who has never fully reconciled himself with sexuality. What weighs on him the most are his unspoken feelings for Thaddeus. While some, such as Thaddeus' wonderful uncle Morris, know just how deeply Kip feels for Thaddeus, Kip fears exposure. Ignoring his friends warnings, and and going against his own better judgement, Kip time and again comes to Thaddeus' aid. Over the years, and in spite of their geographical locations, Kip thinks only of Thaddeus. Even when he realises that Thaddeus has grown into a deeply flawed man, he's unable to 'start living' his own life.
Throughout the course of the novel there are many scenes featuring characters who make only small appearances. Yet, even if they appear for only a scene, readers are giving a clear impression of who they are. The people in this novel have their history, one that has clearly shaped who they are. The people surrounding Thaddeus are particularly toxic, they have fraught relationships with each other, and Kip almost seems at the periphery of this drama.
A sense of unease pervades Kip's narration. We know that something is bound to happen, we can see how skewed his relationship with Thaddeus is, and of course, as Kip remind us, we know that he stands accused of a crime.
The setting and atmosphere within the novel have a deeply nostalgic quality. Spencer further enriches his narrative by adding a plethora of literary references and by having characters discuss politics and social issues relevant at the time.
Kip's philosophical meanderings are engrossing. While the questions he poses himself do not have easy answers, they do give us a glimpse into the most vulnerable parts of himself. In spite of his self-awareness her pursues a path of unhappiness, landing himself in a prison of his own making.
An Ocean Without a Shore is not a happy novel nor is it populated by happy people. There are few moments of respite for Kip, as he has, by the time the book has started, dedicated his life to a person that is not available (nor is he deserving of Kip). Yet, even if readers will despair at Kip for his undying devotion to Thaddeus, and for his inability to move on with his life, we will often feel as he does (unreciprocated love is a painful and all too common thing.
Kip's reticent and slightly ambivalent narration brought to mind Charlotte Brontë's Lucy Snowe (from Villette), while the complex relationship between him and Thaddeus reminded me of the Teddy Wayne's Apartment. Certain scenes wouldn't have been out of place in an Ann Patchett novel (although Spencer's novel is far more cynical, e.g. “You could almost despise them, but really in the larger scheme of things they were just irrelevant. As most of us are.”).
Readers who prefer fast paced narratives may want to steer clear of this novel. But if you are looking for a heartbreaking character study, look no further. Spencer charges seemingly ordinary moments and exchanges with tension, forcing us to question his characters' intentions and the outcome of their relationships. Kip's vibrantly humorous descriptions and his sardonic asides provide a welcome reprieve.
An Ocean Without a Shore is a spellbinding and elegantly written novel that touches upon many themes, such as loneliness, love, family, memory, and money. Kip's narration, which could be subtle and oblique one moment before becoming openly emotional or heartbreakingly poignant, spoke to me (perhaps because I share some of his weakness).
However saddening Kip's story was An Ocean Without a Shore remains a thing of beauty.
Some of my favourite quotes/passages (I more or less underlined the entire novel so I struggled to pick only a few):
“Lives are shaped by words and deeds, but what we don't say might be just as powerful as what we do. Our silence works like a lathe, giving us our final form.”
“The walls of my room were painted white and I kept them bare, not wanting any images or posters or sayings or symbols to somehow define me in the eyes of others. The floors were bare, too. At one point I'd had a five-by-seven Persian carpet I'd bought from a thrift shop, but soon after brining it home I rolled it up and stored it. I thought it said something about me, thought I wasn't sure what.”
“I have revisited and redone and reimagined that night countless times in my solitude. I have behaved in these imagined encounters in ways that my inexperience and shyness and fear would not permit at the time. In my imagination, I have ravished him. In my altered memories, I have made promises even a saint could not keep.”
“Just because something you desire might not be easy, or convenient, or even possible, that doesn't stop you from wanting it.”
“Sometimes all that niceness is a way of making sure nobody quite sees you.”
“You don't add up a person's qualities like something on a balance sheet. We don't know why we love the people we love, not if we really love them. That's the whole purpose of love, to take us out of the rational, binary, up or down, in or out, black or white, good or bad, profit or loss, to take us out of all those everyday things into something sacred.”
“My privacy was paramount, thought it made me unheroic. Not everyone can be a hero; if everyone was heroic, then heroism would be nothing but doing what was expected and we would have no actual heroes. You understand?”
“Here's something else about us torchbearers. We are possessive of the one we love and we are determined to maintain our hold on the idea of them. Our idea of them is really all we have. When you think about someone more or less constantly, you begin to believe—though you would never say so, not even to yourself—that they belong to you.”
“One moment my brain was full of chatter, hyperbole, justifications, and theories of human behavior, a few of them road tested, others shaky to say the least, and the next moment I just went dark, a plunge so precipitous it was like a dress rehearsal for sudden death.”
“I felt desire as a kind of wretchedness.”
“I feel overwhelmed, weirdly diminished. Somewhere along the way, Thaddeus had learned to turn his outgoing nature into a form of aggression, weaponizing the sweetness. Do we all of us become steadily shittier as we grow older?”
“Ah, there it was! As if I haven't had enough. The Magna Carta of self-pity.”
“Hey, heterosexuals, seriously: Get a fucking grip!”
“He was standing three feet away from me. Thirty-six inches. I was unraveling. Passion—untapped, untried, untested, and above all unsullied by compromise or even reality—surged through me.”
“E. M. Forster wrote that given the choice of betraying a friend or betraying his country, he hoped he'd have the guts to betray his country. Understandably, he left out the part about betraying yourself.”
“I was loosing track of who I was, and with the next breath the whole concept of knowing who you are seemed dubious.”
“For this I had thrown away half of my life? For this? For him? For Thaddeus Kaufman? Short answer: yes, if it pleases the Court. Further elucidation, Your Honor: I'd do it all again. ”
“You'd think obsession would simply wither and die, but you'd be wrong. Hopeless love thrives in silence and darkness.”
“I was used to calling myself names. Self-loathing barely fazed; I had self-loathing for breakfast.”
“Yet here came a sharp stinging moment of remembrance, a gasp of memory, crushing and quotidian, devastating in its apparent lack of significance and demanding attention by its mere presence.”
“The heart, malnourished, fearful of dying of starvation, seizes whatever it can, knowing how to live on coincidence and trivialities, gathering and gobbling all the little morsels of meaning, and making a meal of them.”
“I glanced at my watch, feeling that horribly familiar panic—all the time that was being wasted, utterly wasted, the hours, the months, and finally the years.”
“I have learned one of the lessons of loneliness, one of its shocking side effects: when you are in a state of longing, desire goes on and on, like an ocean without a shore.”
An Ocean Without a Shore surprised me. In the very first page our narrator, Kip Woods, informs us that he's awaiting his 'sentence'. Occasionally addressing his listeners/readers directly ('Your Honor' and 'the Court') he recounts the events that led to his present circumstances.
Set in late nineties, An Ocean Without a Shore follows Kip, a gay man in his forties who works at a small investment firm and has been in love with his best friend since their college days. Thaddeus Kaufman, married with children, owns a property he can't afford and as a persona non grata in Hollywood is struggling to succeed as a scriptwriter. When Thaddeus' latest writing effort bear no fruit, he finds himself in need of a bailout, so he gives Kip a call. Lucky for him, Kip is always read, and more than willing, to help.
“I realize this all sounds rather abject. But it's not really love unless there is something abject in it. Don't you think?”
There is much to be admired in the novel. Scott Spencer high-register prose is striking. I was dazzled by Kip's vocabulary, his expressive descriptions, and his long moments of introspections. Spencer beautifully renders Kip's many feelings and thoughts, hinting at his underlining loneliness, vibrantly rendering his desire for Thaddeus. There is yearning, resentment, and sorrow. Kip is a private and remote person who has never fully reconciled himself with sexuality. What weighs on him the most are his unspoken feelings for Thaddeus. While some, such as Thaddeus' wonderful uncle Morris, know just how deeply Kip feels for Thaddeus, Kip fears exposure. Ignoring his friends warnings, and and going against his own better judgement, Kip time and again comes to Thaddeus' aid. Over the years, and in spite of their geographical locations, Kip thinks only of Thaddeus. Even when he realises that Thaddeus has grown into a deeply flawed man, he's unable to 'start living' his own life.
Throughout the course of the novel there are many scenes featuring characters who make only small appearances. Yet, even if they appear for only a scene, readers are giving a clear impression of who they are. The people in this novel have their history, one that has clearly shaped who they are. The people surrounding Thaddeus are particularly toxic, they have fraught relationships with each other, and Kip almost seems at the periphery of this drama.
A sense of unease pervades Kip's narration. We know that something is bound to happen, we can see how skewed his relationship with Thaddeus is, and of course, as Kip remind us, we know that he stands accused of a crime.
The setting and atmosphere within the novel have a deeply nostalgic quality. Spencer further enriches his narrative by adding a plethora of literary references and by having characters discuss politics and social issues relevant at the time.
Kip's philosophical meanderings are engrossing. While the questions he poses himself do not have easy answers, they do give us a glimpse into the most vulnerable parts of himself. In spite of his self-awareness her pursues a path of unhappiness, landing himself in a prison of his own making.
An Ocean Without a Shore is not a happy novel nor is it populated by happy people. There are few moments of respite for Kip, as he has, by the time the book has started, dedicated his life to a person that is not available (nor is he deserving of Kip). Yet, even if readers will despair at Kip for his undying devotion to Thaddeus, and for his inability to move on with his life, we will often feel as he does (unreciprocated love is a painful and all too common thing.
Kip's reticent and slightly ambivalent narration brought to mind Charlotte Brontë's Lucy Snowe (from Villette), while the complex relationship between him and Thaddeus reminded me of the Teddy Wayne's Apartment. Certain scenes wouldn't have been out of place in an Ann Patchett novel (although Spencer's novel is far more cynical, e.g. “You could almost despise them, but really in the larger scheme of things they were just irrelevant. As most of us are.”).
Readers who prefer fast paced narratives may want to steer clear of this novel. But if you are looking for a heartbreaking character study, look no further. Spencer charges seemingly ordinary moments and exchanges with tension, forcing us to question his characters' intentions and the outcome of their relationships. Kip's vibrantly humorous descriptions and his sardonic asides provide a welcome reprieve.
An Ocean Without a Shore is a spellbinding and elegantly written novel that touches upon many themes, such as loneliness, love, family, memory, and money. Kip's narration, which could be subtle and oblique one moment before becoming openly emotional or heartbreakingly poignant, spoke to me (perhaps because I share some of his weakness).
However saddening Kip's story was An Ocean Without a Shore remains a thing of beauty.
Some of my favourite quotes/passages (I more or less underlined the entire novel so I struggled to pick only a few):
“Lives are shaped by words and deeds, but what we don't say might be just as powerful as what we do. Our silence works like a lathe, giving us our final form.”
“The walls of my room were painted white and I kept them bare, not wanting any images or posters or sayings or symbols to somehow define me in the eyes of others. The floors were bare, too. At one point I'd had a five-by-seven Persian carpet I'd bought from a thrift shop, but soon after brining it home I rolled it up and stored it. I thought it said something about me, thought I wasn't sure what.”
“I have revisited and redone and reimagined that night countless times in my solitude. I have behaved in these imagined encounters in ways that my inexperience and shyness and fear would not permit at the time. In my imagination, I have ravished him. In my altered memories, I have made promises even a saint could not keep.”
“Just because something you desire might not be easy, or convenient, or even possible, that doesn't stop you from wanting it.”
“Sometimes all that niceness is a way of making sure nobody quite sees you.”
“You don't add up a person's qualities like something on a balance sheet. We don't know why we love the people we love, not if we really love them. That's the whole purpose of love, to take us out of the rational, binary, up or down, in or out, black or white, good or bad, profit or loss, to take us out of all those everyday things into something sacred.”
“My privacy was paramount, thought it made me unheroic. Not everyone can be a hero; if everyone was heroic, then heroism would be nothing but doing what was expected and we would have no actual heroes. You understand?”
“Here's something else about us torchbearers. We are possessive of the one we love and we are determined to maintain our hold on the idea of them. Our idea of them is really all we have. When you think about someone more or less constantly, you begin to believe—though you would never say so, not even to yourself—that they belong to you.”
“One moment my brain was full of chatter, hyperbole, justifications, and theories of human behavior, a few of them road tested, others shaky to say the least, and the next moment I just went dark, a plunge so precipitous it was like a dress rehearsal for sudden death.”
“I felt desire as a kind of wretchedness.”
“I feel overwhelmed, weirdly diminished. Somewhere along the way, Thaddeus had learned to turn his outgoing nature into a form of aggression, weaponizing the sweetness. Do we all of us become steadily shittier as we grow older?”
“Ah, there it was! As if I haven't had enough. The Magna Carta of self-pity.”
“Hey, heterosexuals, seriously: Get a fucking grip!”
“He was standing three feet away from me. Thirty-six inches. I was unraveling. Passion—untapped, untried, untested, and above all unsullied by compromise or even reality—surged through me.”
“E. M. Forster wrote that given the choice of betraying a friend or betraying his country, he hoped he'd have the guts to betray his country. Understandably, he left out the part about betraying yourself.”
“I was loosing track of who I was, and with the next breath the whole concept of knowing who you are seemed dubious.”
“For this I had thrown away half of my life? For this? For him? For Thaddeus Kaufman? Short answer: yes, if it pleases the Court. Further elucidation, Your Honor: I'd do it all again. ”
“You'd think obsession would simply wither and die, but you'd be wrong. Hopeless love thrives in silence and darkness.”
“I was used to calling myself names. Self-loathing barely fazed; I had self-loathing for breakfast.”
“Yet here came a sharp stinging moment of remembrance, a gasp of memory, crushing and quotidian, devastating in its apparent lack of significance and demanding attention by its mere presence.”
“The heart, malnourished, fearful of dying of starvation, seizes whatever it can, knowing how to live on coincidence and trivialities, gathering and gobbling all the little morsels of meaning, and making a meal of them.”
“I glanced at my watch, feeling that horribly familiar panic—all the time that was being wasted, utterly wasted, the hours, the months, and finally the years.”
June 17, 2020
Audio 5+ Exquisite Stars
Story 4.5 Love Makes You Senseless Stars
Damn this book and it's flawed characters!
I couldn't understand how or why would an intelligent man, like Kip, could be in love with his self absorbed user and loser so called friend Thaddeus. For 30 years he gives and gives and gives, while Thaddeus (the pathetic) takes, and takes and takes.
As much as the story frustrated the heck out of me, I fell in the author's story telling, his writing and the narrator's exquisite performance.
Story 4.5 Love Makes You Senseless Stars
Damn this book and it's flawed characters!
I couldn't understand how or why would an intelligent man, like Kip, could be in love with his self absorbed user and loser so called friend Thaddeus. For 30 years he gives and gives and gives, while Thaddeus (the pathetic) takes, and takes and takes.
As much as the story frustrated the heck out of me, I fell in the author's story telling, his writing and the narrator's exquisite performance.
August 25, 2024
ho sentito qualcuno dire che Spencer è scorrevole e vorrei farci due parole
giuro voglio solo parlare
facciamo che sarebbero 2.5 stelle ma sono talmente PIENA che boh
assolutamente il libro da NON leggere se il blocco del lettore è in agguato, queste 350 pagine mi sono pesate come 3000, un macigno (ammetto anche di non essere esattamente nel momento adatto a leggere testi così impegnativi. Si fa leggere perché scritto bene, fine)
avrei tagliato almeno 75-100 pagine per me totalmente inutili, ci sono certe di quelle scene che mi hanno fatto venir voglia di strapparmi gli occhi o cancellarmi la memoria, le classiche “I miss 10 seconds ago, when I didn’t know this existed”. Mi chiedo come si possano scrivere, in un contesto serio, parole come “genitali da proletario, il glande era un elmetto da operaio, lo scroto il cestino del pranzo.”, qui francamente mi sono sbellicata in preda all’isteria perché non volevo crederci
la lettera finale vale tutto il libro e arriva in concomitanza al climax del romanzo, confinato tristemente nelle ultime 30 pagine dopo una sfiancante riflessione socio-cultural-economica di dubbia utilità dopo l’altra
insomma, per comunicare il messaggio al centro del libro, ossia che a) il dio denaro è brutto e cattivo e riduce in schiavitù le persone e che b) è inutile struggersi una vita intera per qualcuno perché tanto te la metterà nel culo (letteralmente, ops) nel peggiore dei modi possibili non serviva un libro del genere, ne serviva la metà (o anche meno, dipende dal vostro livello di sopportazione)
giuro voglio solo parlare
facciamo che sarebbero 2.5 stelle ma sono talmente PIENA che boh
assolutamente il libro da NON leggere se il blocco del lettore è in agguato, queste 350 pagine mi sono pesate come 3000, un macigno (ammetto anche di non essere esattamente nel momento adatto a leggere testi così impegnativi. Si fa leggere perché scritto bene, fine)
avrei tagliato almeno 75-100 pagine per me totalmente inutili, ci sono certe di quelle scene che mi hanno fatto venir voglia di strapparmi gli occhi o cancellarmi la memoria, le classiche “I miss 10 seconds ago, when I didn’t know this existed”. Mi chiedo come si possano scrivere, in un contesto serio, parole come “genitali da proletario, il glande era un elmetto da operaio, lo scroto il cestino del pranzo.”, qui francamente mi sono sbellicata in preda all’isteria perché non volevo crederci
la lettera finale vale tutto il libro e arriva in concomitanza al climax del romanzo, confinato tristemente nelle ultime 30 pagine dopo una sfiancante riflessione socio-cultural-economica di dubbia utilità dopo l’altra
insomma, per comunicare il messaggio al centro del libro, ossia che a) il dio denaro è brutto e cattivo e riduce in schiavitù le persone e che b) è inutile struggersi una vita intera per qualcuno perché tanto te la metterà nel culo (letteralmente, ops) nel peggiore dei modi possibili non serviva un libro del genere, ne serviva la metà (o anche meno, dipende dal vostro livello di sopportazione)
March 1, 2024
Audiobook - 4 stars
Story - 4.5 stars
This was really good.
Story - 4.5 stars
This was really good.
September 10, 2023
“Confessate la verità e voltate pagina, e se non potete confessare i vostri sentimenti allora uccideteli.”
Questa è la storia di un’ossessione.
Ancora una volta, dopo ‘Un amore assoluto’, Scott Spencer ci porta, lentamente e febbrilmente, nel nucleo incandescente e disperato di un amore senza confini.
Questa volta si tratta di una passione non corrisposta ma tenacemente aggrappata soltanto a sé stessa, come in un oceano senza sponde.
Pagina uno: Kip sta aspettando la sentenza di un giudice (il motivo lo sapremo solo alla fine) e intanto ha tempo e modo di riflettere sulla sua vita: al centro la sua inesausta devozione a Thaddeus, ex compagno di college, ora marito innamorato di Claire e padre di due figli.
Sceneggiatore fallito, per evitare il tracollo Thaddeus chiede aiuto a Kip, l’amico fidato, l’amico di sempre, favorito da una situazione economica florida e stabile (nonché invidiata).
Il denaro è il convitato di pietra di questa storia. Siede immobile e determinato accanto a tutti i protagonisti, ne indirizza le scelte e gli umori, ne dirige i fragili equilibri: “i soldi ti comandano, in un certo senso ti definiscono, ti dicono chi sei.” L’epigrafe iniziale, infatti, è una citazione di Simone Weil che recita così: “Il denaro distrugge le radici ovunque penetra”.
Tutta la vita di Kip è costruita intorno allo sforzo di nascondersi: la sua omosessualità prima di tutto e poi la passione devastante che vi è collegata. La devozione all’amore per Thaddeus è cosa sacra e non subisce quasi incrinature. “Ti distruggerà” lo avverte un vero amico (l’unico che ha capito il problema); anche senza saperlo e senza volerlo, ti distruggerà. Ma per Kip è come essere scivolati in un toboga senza freni e senza appigli, una slitta lanciata lungo un canyon. Forte come l’amore. Forte come la morte. Un binomio classico dall’esito irreversibile.
La storia che ci narra Kip è il resoconto di una coscienza arrivata al capolinea. Seguire il racconto delle vicende e assorbirne le riflessioni è come immergersi piano piano in quel marasma umano che ha la stessa sostanza dei sogni. Dramma e melodramma si avvolgono come spire lungo la linea retta di un destino. Quello di chi ama inutilmente, ma soprattutto di chi mentendo al mondo per tutta la vita si avvolge in un bozzolo, credendosi al riparo dalla verità.
Ahimè, niente è più fragile della nostra illusione di avere tutto sotto controllo. Kip lo scoprirà a sue spese e noi avremo l’occasione di farci un esame di coscienza e qualche utile domanda.
Questa è la storia di un’ossessione.
Ancora una volta, dopo ‘Un amore assoluto’, Scott Spencer ci porta, lentamente e febbrilmente, nel nucleo incandescente e disperato di un amore senza confini.
Questa volta si tratta di una passione non corrisposta ma tenacemente aggrappata soltanto a sé stessa, come in un oceano senza sponde.
Pagina uno: Kip sta aspettando la sentenza di un giudice (il motivo lo sapremo solo alla fine) e intanto ha tempo e modo di riflettere sulla sua vita: al centro la sua inesausta devozione a Thaddeus, ex compagno di college, ora marito innamorato di Claire e padre di due figli.
Sceneggiatore fallito, per evitare il tracollo Thaddeus chiede aiuto a Kip, l’amico fidato, l’amico di sempre, favorito da una situazione economica florida e stabile (nonché invidiata).
Il denaro è il convitato di pietra di questa storia. Siede immobile e determinato accanto a tutti i protagonisti, ne indirizza le scelte e gli umori, ne dirige i fragili equilibri: “i soldi ti comandano, in un certo senso ti definiscono, ti dicono chi sei.” L’epigrafe iniziale, infatti, è una citazione di Simone Weil che recita così: “Il denaro distrugge le radici ovunque penetra”.
Tutta la vita di Kip è costruita intorno allo sforzo di nascondersi: la sua omosessualità prima di tutto e poi la passione devastante che vi è collegata. La devozione all’amore per Thaddeus è cosa sacra e non subisce quasi incrinature. “Ti distruggerà” lo avverte un vero amico (l’unico che ha capito il problema); anche senza saperlo e senza volerlo, ti distruggerà. Ma per Kip è come essere scivolati in un toboga senza freni e senza appigli, una slitta lanciata lungo un canyon. Forte come l’amore. Forte come la morte. Un binomio classico dall’esito irreversibile.
La storia che ci narra Kip è il resoconto di una coscienza arrivata al capolinea. Seguire il racconto delle vicende e assorbirne le riflessioni è come immergersi piano piano in quel marasma umano che ha la stessa sostanza dei sogni. Dramma e melodramma si avvolgono come spire lungo la linea retta di un destino. Quello di chi ama inutilmente, ma soprattutto di chi mentendo al mondo per tutta la vita si avvolge in un bozzolo, credendosi al riparo dalla verità.
Ahimè, niente è più fragile della nostra illusione di avere tutto sotto controllo. Kip lo scoprirà a sue spese e noi avremo l’occasione di farci un esame di coscienza e qualche utile domanda.
January 26, 2023
Kip è single e lavora a Wall Street, guadagnando parecchio.
Thaddeus, invece, ha moglie e figli, ma è disoccupato da anni e non è più in grado di mantenere la propria casa, l’enorme villa a cui è affezionatissimo.
Quando Thaddeus chiede aiuto economico all’amico, il legame che li unisce inizia a cambiare. Per Kip, infatti, diventa sempre più difficile nascondere la sua omosessualità e il fatto di essere segretamente innamorato di Thaddeus da sempre.
🌺
“Un oceano senza sponde” affronta diverse tematiche.
👉🏻 Quella centrale riguarda la difficoltà di dichiarare il proprio amore a un’altra persona. Kip vorrebbe confessare all’amico i propri sentimenti, ma, per paura di un rifiuto o di perdere l’amicizia con Thaddeus, non fa che rimandare il momento. In questo modo si condanna a una vita di grande sofferenza, una vita fatta di attese e false speranze.
👉🏻 Collegato a questo tema c’è quello dell’omosessualità e della difficoltà di parlarne pubblicamente - problema molto diffuso all’epoca in cui è ambientata la storia, a fine anni ‘90. Kip non teme solo il giudizio dell’amico, ma quello di quasi tutte le persone che lo circondano e, pertanto, indossa sempre una maschera: si fa vedere in compagnia di donne, mente a conoscenti e genitori e vive nella costante paura di essere scoperto.
👉🏻 Molto importante, poi, è il tema dell’idealismo e dell’incapacità di rinunciare ai propri sogni quando è palese che non si realizzeranno mai. Thaddeus è convinto di poter sfondare come sceneggiatore e si rifiuta di vedere l’evidenza: che le sue bozze non piacciono a nessuno. Nemmeno il rischio di perdere la sua casa - l’immensa dimora in cui vive trincerato da anni e alla quale è estremamente affezionato - lo spinge a cercarsi un altro lavoro. Thaddeus è, di fatto, un Gatsby moderno: un eterno sognatore, desideroso di riscatto e incapace di fare i conti con la realtà.
👉🏻 Infine, c’è il tema del denaro. Thaddeus non ne ha ed è infelice, Kip invece ne ha fin troppo, ma è ugualmente infelice.
Quando Kip decide di aiutare Thaddeus, la situazione dovrebbe migliorare per entrambi: Thaddeus avrebbe i soldi per tirare avanti e Kip la gioia di aver salvato l’amico. E, invece, la situazione peggiora ulteriormente. Questo apre le porte a tante riflessioni. La prima, quella più scontata, è su come il denaro possa modificare la natura dell’uomo e rovinare i legami con altre persone.
Aggiungo che la scrittura di Scott Spencer mi è piaciuta tantissimo, così come ho apprezzato i numerosi riferimenti letterari che si trovano lungo tutto il romanzo.
Leggerò altro di suo? Sicuramente!
COMMENTO PIÙ APPROFONDITO
Kip e Thaddeus ci appaiono, all’inizio, due personaggi quasi agli antipodi.
Il primo, pur essendo molto intellettuale, ha scelto un lavoro a Wall Street, un lavoro che ruota tutto attorno al denaro. Ha continuato a leggere, a frequentare teatri e mostre, ma l’ha fatto nel tempo libero, concependo la cultura come un qualcosa di “extra”, che va oltre il lavoro - che per lui serve unicamente a garantire stabilità. Kip, quindi, è stato capace di superare i sogni e gli ideali che si hanno in gioventù, comprendendo l’importanza di altri aspetti, più pratici.
Quello che a Kip manca, invece, è una vita sentimentale. L’amore - segreto - che prova per Thaddeus, oltre a logorarlo, gli impedisce di crescere, di crearsi una relazione stabile. Ci sono situazioni, nel romanzo, in cui Kip si trova a contatto con altre coppie gay e le invidia, rendendosi conto di quanto siano felici e spensierate mentre lui è, di fatto, come “congelato”, nell’attesa del “momento giusto”, il momento in cui riuscirà a rivelare tutto all’amico. E, nell’attesa, si rifugia in avventure di una notte, spesso con prostituti e con la costante paura di essere scoperto.
Thaddeus ci appare, inizialmente, come l’esatto opposto.
Da un punto di vista sentimentale sembra soddisfatto: ha una moglie che adora, due figli, tanti animali e una casa immensa di cui va fiero (ovviamente questo è quello che appare da fuori, la realtà è ben diversa).
Dal punto di vista lavorativo, invece, è un completo fallimento. Dopo aver tentato, da giovane, di intraprendere la carriera di sceneggiatore, ha ottenuto sempre meno incarichi, fino a diventare disoccupato. Molti, al suo posto, avrebbero cercato di reagire, di trovare un altro tipo di lavoro, uno qualsiasi pur di guadagnare i soldi per tirare avanti.
Ma lui no.
Lui persevera nel suo sogno, convincendosi che, prima o poi, qualcuno accetterà le sue proposte e lui diventerà famoso. Il problema di Thaddeus non è la mancanza di voglia di lavorare - lui lavora forsennatamente a scrivere sceneggiature -, ma l’incapacità di conciliare sogno e realtà. Vive trincerato nella sua villa, che gli ricorda quelle di tanti romanzi che ha amato (in primis “Il grande Gatsby”) e non capisce che la vita non va sempre come si desidera. Ovviamente il richiamo al Grande Gatsby non è solo nella villa, ma in tutte le varie sfaccettature di Thaddeus. Lui è, di fatto, un Gatsby moderno: la sua Daisy è la carriera di sceneggiatore.
È molto importante notare che entrambi i protagonisti, all’inizio del romanzo, sono “bloccati”.
Kip è bloccato sentimentalmente e pertanto si rifugia sempre di più nel lavoro, mentre Thaddeus è bloccato professionalmente e si chiude sempre di più nella sua villa fuori dal mondo.
Cosa permette di sbloccare una situazione in stallo da anni?
I soldi.
Quando Thaddeus si rende conto di non essere più in grado di mantenere la sua amata villa, chiama Kip, chiedendogli aiuto. E Kip non può certo rifiutare.
Entra quindi in gioco il tema del denaro - tema che verrà ripreso continuamente nel romanzo (non a caso, Kip è un intellettuale che ha scelto un lavoro basato unicamente sui soldi e questo lo spinge a fare tante riflessioni interessanti sul loro significato).
Questo passaggio di denaro da Kip a Thaddeus interrompe l’immobilità che durava da anni e consente due tipi di cambiamenti: l’evoluzione di dei personaggi e l’evoluzione del rapporto che li unisce.
Entrambi i cambiamenti sono molto complessi, in quanto hanno sia risvolti negativi che positivi. Da un lato, il denaro permette di avvicinare ancora di più i due amici e, ipoteticamente, di trasformare l’amicizia in amore, come desidererebbe Kip. Dall’altro, però, i soldi, o meglio il bisogno di soldi, fanno venire fuori quella che è la vera natura dell’uomo e quelle che sono realmente le sue priorità.
Qui ci sarebbero tante riflessioni da fare, ma per evitare spoiler mi limito a dire che sia Kip che Thaddeus riusciranno a trovare la strada che avevano smarrito - chi nel bene e chi nel male, chi con maggiore consapevolezza di sé stesso e chi con meno.
“Un oceano senza sponde” non è quindi solo la storia di un amore segreto e logorante, così come non è solo la storia di una persona gay incapace di ammettere la propria omosessualità: è anche una storia di formazione molto profonda e ricca di riflessioni.
Thaddeus, invece, ha moglie e figli, ma è disoccupato da anni e non è più in grado di mantenere la propria casa, l’enorme villa a cui è affezionatissimo.
Quando Thaddeus chiede aiuto economico all’amico, il legame che li unisce inizia a cambiare. Per Kip, infatti, diventa sempre più difficile nascondere la sua omosessualità e il fatto di essere segretamente innamorato di Thaddeus da sempre.
🌺
“Un oceano senza sponde” affronta diverse tematiche.
👉🏻 Quella centrale riguarda la difficoltà di dichiarare il proprio amore a un’altra persona. Kip vorrebbe confessare all’amico i propri sentimenti, ma, per paura di un rifiuto o di perdere l’amicizia con Thaddeus, non fa che rimandare il momento. In questo modo si condanna a una vita di grande sofferenza, una vita fatta di attese e false speranze.
👉🏻 Collegato a questo tema c’è quello dell’omosessualità e della difficoltà di parlarne pubblicamente - problema molto diffuso all’epoca in cui è ambientata la storia, a fine anni ‘90. Kip non teme solo il giudizio dell’amico, ma quello di quasi tutte le persone che lo circondano e, pertanto, indossa sempre una maschera: si fa vedere in compagnia di donne, mente a conoscenti e genitori e vive nella costante paura di essere scoperto.
👉🏻 Molto importante, poi, è il tema dell’idealismo e dell’incapacità di rinunciare ai propri sogni quando è palese che non si realizzeranno mai. Thaddeus è convinto di poter sfondare come sceneggiatore e si rifiuta di vedere l’evidenza: che le sue bozze non piacciono a nessuno. Nemmeno il rischio di perdere la sua casa - l’immensa dimora in cui vive trincerato da anni e alla quale è estremamente affezionato - lo spinge a cercarsi un altro lavoro. Thaddeus è, di fatto, un Gatsby moderno: un eterno sognatore, desideroso di riscatto e incapace di fare i conti con la realtà.
👉🏻 Infine, c’è il tema del denaro. Thaddeus non ne ha ed è infelice, Kip invece ne ha fin troppo, ma è ugualmente infelice.
Quando Kip decide di aiutare Thaddeus, la situazione dovrebbe migliorare per entrambi: Thaddeus avrebbe i soldi per tirare avanti e Kip la gioia di aver salvato l’amico. E, invece, la situazione peggiora ulteriormente. Questo apre le porte a tante riflessioni. La prima, quella più scontata, è su come il denaro possa modificare la natura dell’uomo e rovinare i legami con altre persone.
Aggiungo che la scrittura di Scott Spencer mi è piaciuta tantissimo, così come ho apprezzato i numerosi riferimenti letterari che si trovano lungo tutto il romanzo.
Leggerò altro di suo? Sicuramente!
COMMENTO PIÙ APPROFONDITO
Kip e Thaddeus ci appaiono, all’inizio, due personaggi quasi agli antipodi.
Il primo, pur essendo molto intellettuale, ha scelto un lavoro a Wall Street, un lavoro che ruota tutto attorno al denaro. Ha continuato a leggere, a frequentare teatri e mostre, ma l’ha fatto nel tempo libero, concependo la cultura come un qualcosa di “extra”, che va oltre il lavoro - che per lui serve unicamente a garantire stabilità. Kip, quindi, è stato capace di superare i sogni e gli ideali che si hanno in gioventù, comprendendo l’importanza di altri aspetti, più pratici.
Quello che a Kip manca, invece, è una vita sentimentale. L’amore - segreto - che prova per Thaddeus, oltre a logorarlo, gli impedisce di crescere, di crearsi una relazione stabile. Ci sono situazioni, nel romanzo, in cui Kip si trova a contatto con altre coppie gay e le invidia, rendendosi conto di quanto siano felici e spensierate mentre lui è, di fatto, come “congelato”, nell’attesa del “momento giusto”, il momento in cui riuscirà a rivelare tutto all’amico. E, nell’attesa, si rifugia in avventure di una notte, spesso con prostituti e con la costante paura di essere scoperto.
Thaddeus ci appare, inizialmente, come l’esatto opposto.
Da un punto di vista sentimentale sembra soddisfatto: ha una moglie che adora, due figli, tanti animali e una casa immensa di cui va fiero (ovviamente questo è quello che appare da fuori, la realtà è ben diversa).
Dal punto di vista lavorativo, invece, è un completo fallimento. Dopo aver tentato, da giovane, di intraprendere la carriera di sceneggiatore, ha ottenuto sempre meno incarichi, fino a diventare disoccupato. Molti, al suo posto, avrebbero cercato di reagire, di trovare un altro tipo di lavoro, uno qualsiasi pur di guadagnare i soldi per tirare avanti.
Ma lui no.
Lui persevera nel suo sogno, convincendosi che, prima o poi, qualcuno accetterà le sue proposte e lui diventerà famoso. Il problema di Thaddeus non è la mancanza di voglia di lavorare - lui lavora forsennatamente a scrivere sceneggiature -, ma l’incapacità di conciliare sogno e realtà. Vive trincerato nella sua villa, che gli ricorda quelle di tanti romanzi che ha amato (in primis “Il grande Gatsby”) e non capisce che la vita non va sempre come si desidera. Ovviamente il richiamo al Grande Gatsby non è solo nella villa, ma in tutte le varie sfaccettature di Thaddeus. Lui è, di fatto, un Gatsby moderno: la sua Daisy è la carriera di sceneggiatore.
È molto importante notare che entrambi i protagonisti, all’inizio del romanzo, sono “bloccati”.
Kip è bloccato sentimentalmente e pertanto si rifugia sempre di più nel lavoro, mentre Thaddeus è bloccato professionalmente e si chiude sempre di più nella sua villa fuori dal mondo.
Cosa permette di sbloccare una situazione in stallo da anni?
I soldi.
Quando Thaddeus si rende conto di non essere più in grado di mantenere la sua amata villa, chiama Kip, chiedendogli aiuto. E Kip non può certo rifiutare.
Entra quindi in gioco il tema del denaro - tema che verrà ripreso continuamente nel romanzo (non a caso, Kip è un intellettuale che ha scelto un lavoro basato unicamente sui soldi e questo lo spinge a fare tante riflessioni interessanti sul loro significato).
Questo passaggio di denaro da Kip a Thaddeus interrompe l’immobilità che durava da anni e consente due tipi di cambiamenti: l’evoluzione di dei personaggi e l’evoluzione del rapporto che li unisce.
Entrambi i cambiamenti sono molto complessi, in quanto hanno sia risvolti negativi che positivi. Da un lato, il denaro permette di avvicinare ancora di più i due amici e, ipoteticamente, di trasformare l’amicizia in amore, come desidererebbe Kip. Dall’altro, però, i soldi, o meglio il bisogno di soldi, fanno venire fuori quella che è la vera natura dell’uomo e quelle che sono realmente le sue priorità.
Qui ci sarebbero tante riflessioni da fare, ma per evitare spoiler mi limito a dire che sia Kip che Thaddeus riusciranno a trovare la strada che avevano smarrito - chi nel bene e chi nel male, chi con maggiore consapevolezza di sé stesso e chi con meno.
“Un oceano senza sponde” non è quindi solo la storia di un amore segreto e logorante, così come non è solo la storia di una persona gay incapace di ammettere la propria omosessualità: è anche una storia di formazione molto profonda e ricca di riflessioni.
June 23, 2020
AN OCEAN WITHOUT A SHORE
BY SCOTT SPENCER
I remember when I was a young teenager my mother and I going to see the movie, "Endless Love." It was based on the book by Scott Spencer. If you are old enough to remember that movie then you already know what an intelligent writer Scott Spencer is on the complexities and multilayered emotions that are involved by a life long love. A love so deep that starts in youth until you realize that that object of your desire is not in love with you in quite the same way. This gem of a novel is written so beautifully and the author has a deft command of language. There were so many philosophical observations about life that I would have filled this review with hundreds of quotes. Scott Spencer is sophisticated enough to understand what motivates people in every kind of relationship.
In this cleverly plotted tale of a gay man named Christopher Wood--nicknamed Kip, as a reader I was so enamored by the dialogue between Christopher and all of the characters. Christopher is narrating the story of how he is in a jail of his own making by the end of the story. He fell in love with Thaddeus in their youth. Thaddeus and Kip are best friends. Thaddeus is married to Grace who he confides to Kip that he doesn't think that his daughter Emma is his. Thaddeus thinks Grace had an affair with a handyman that lives on their property. Thaddeus is a struggling writer of screenplays in particular and living on many acres of beautiful undeveloped land in the Hudson Valley outside of New York City. Grace is also a struggling artist whose paintings have gotten nothing but rejections until recently. The couple live beyond their means in a huge old antiquated house that is falling apart and they can't afford to heat.
It is Kip whom Thaddeus asks for a loan of $130,000.00 dollars in exchange for some acres of their land. It is understood between both Kip and Thaddeus that the arrangement is only temporary and when Thaddeus pays back Kip that Kip will surrender his acres of land. Kip is a broker on Wall Street and money is of no importance to him as he earns a fortune. Kip does realize how pervasive money can be in our society. Kip is kind he is noble and he has loved Thaddeus into their middle aged years but always keeping it a secret as he is a private man.
When Thaddeus's mother commits suicide in her used bookstore in Chicago Kip witnesses some pretty grotesque behavior from Thaddeus as he demands to see the will in his mother's lawyer's office. He practically assaults the attorney because she says that it has to be registered with the court first. It is Kip that Thaddeus calls to fly from the bay area in California to make the final arrangements with regarding his mother's affairs such as cremation. Thaddeus is so money hungry he ransacks first the bookstore and then her apartment.
Thaddeus reminded me of an immature opportunist that was delusional about his talent as a writer living in a loveless marriage. He knows that Kip has always loved him and he wasn't beneath asking Kip to put his job on the line not to mention prison by asking Kip for information about what we know would be inside trading.
This was a superbly well written novel handling the dynamics of a love that is taken for granted by Thaddeus and I felt that the scales were tipped and that there was a power imbalance between them. I don't want to give anymore spoiler information but I was pleasantly surprised how much I loved this novel. There is so much wisdom written into the plot and the characterization's brilliantly done. As I said Scott Spencer writes interesting observations about what motivates us as human's and his prose is simply exquisite. This is a stunning work that I am grateful to have had the opportunity to discover. Brilliant insights. Poetic narrative. A book that I was sorry to say goodbye to when it ended. Highly recommended and Five plus stars!
Thank you to Net Galley, Scott Spencer and HarperCollin's Publisher's for providing me with my ARC in exchange for a fair and honest review. All opinions are my own.
BY SCOTT SPENCER
I remember when I was a young teenager my mother and I going to see the movie, "Endless Love." It was based on the book by Scott Spencer. If you are old enough to remember that movie then you already know what an intelligent writer Scott Spencer is on the complexities and multilayered emotions that are involved by a life long love. A love so deep that starts in youth until you realize that that object of your desire is not in love with you in quite the same way. This gem of a novel is written so beautifully and the author has a deft command of language. There were so many philosophical observations about life that I would have filled this review with hundreds of quotes. Scott Spencer is sophisticated enough to understand what motivates people in every kind of relationship.
In this cleverly plotted tale of a gay man named Christopher Wood--nicknamed Kip, as a reader I was so enamored by the dialogue between Christopher and all of the characters. Christopher is narrating the story of how he is in a jail of his own making by the end of the story. He fell in love with Thaddeus in their youth. Thaddeus and Kip are best friends. Thaddeus is married to Grace who he confides to Kip that he doesn't think that his daughter Emma is his. Thaddeus thinks Grace had an affair with a handyman that lives on their property. Thaddeus is a struggling writer of screenplays in particular and living on many acres of beautiful undeveloped land in the Hudson Valley outside of New York City. Grace is also a struggling artist whose paintings have gotten nothing but rejections until recently. The couple live beyond their means in a huge old antiquated house that is falling apart and they can't afford to heat.
It is Kip whom Thaddeus asks for a loan of $130,000.00 dollars in exchange for some acres of their land. It is understood between both Kip and Thaddeus that the arrangement is only temporary and when Thaddeus pays back Kip that Kip will surrender his acres of land. Kip is a broker on Wall Street and money is of no importance to him as he earns a fortune. Kip does realize how pervasive money can be in our society. Kip is kind he is noble and he has loved Thaddeus into their middle aged years but always keeping it a secret as he is a private man.
When Thaddeus's mother commits suicide in her used bookstore in Chicago Kip witnesses some pretty grotesque behavior from Thaddeus as he demands to see the will in his mother's lawyer's office. He practically assaults the attorney because she says that it has to be registered with the court first. It is Kip that Thaddeus calls to fly from the bay area in California to make the final arrangements with regarding his mother's affairs such as cremation. Thaddeus is so money hungry he ransacks first the bookstore and then her apartment.
Thaddeus reminded me of an immature opportunist that was delusional about his talent as a writer living in a loveless marriage. He knows that Kip has always loved him and he wasn't beneath asking Kip to put his job on the line not to mention prison by asking Kip for information about what we know would be inside trading.
This was a superbly well written novel handling the dynamics of a love that is taken for granted by Thaddeus and I felt that the scales were tipped and that there was a power imbalance between them. I don't want to give anymore spoiler information but I was pleasantly surprised how much I loved this novel. There is so much wisdom written into the plot and the characterization's brilliantly done. As I said Scott Spencer writes interesting observations about what motivates us as human's and his prose is simply exquisite. This is a stunning work that I am grateful to have had the opportunity to discover. Brilliant insights. Poetic narrative. A book that I was sorry to say goodbye to when it ended. Highly recommended and Five plus stars!
Thank you to Net Galley, Scott Spencer and HarperCollin's Publisher's for providing me with my ARC in exchange for a fair and honest review. All opinions are my own.
January 19, 2020
At the library, we get a lot of pre-publication galleys for books from publishers. I always go through them to find some new reading material. When I took a look at An Ocean Without a Shore by Scott Spencer, my curiosity was piqued. Spencer was the author of Endless Love, which I never read (or saw the movie) but has a bit of a reputation for being an over-heated romance with a bit of obsessive behavior thrown in, and his latest novel tells the story of an obsessive, unrequited love held by one man for another. I thought, well that's an interesting choice for an author so tied to a classic heterosexual romance.
Kip and Thaddeus have been friends since college. Best friends. In fact, Kip has been infatuated with Thaddeus since the moment they met, to the point of feeling such an intense love for this man, he couldn't allow himself to ever fall in love with anyone else for fear of disappointment. The problem is, Kip is a deeply closeted homosexual, and Thaddeus is straight. With the exception one a drunken blowjob in college, this one-sided relationship remains just that throughout the bulk of the novel which ends with the men in their 50's. Kip becomes successful working for an investment firm in NYC, while Thaddeus writes a screenplay for a successful movie, makes a lot of money, spends it all on a sprawling mansion on the Hudson, and begins a slow financial decline struggling to reproduce his lightning-quick success. He's also married with two children.
Spencer writes a compelling enough novel; I read it pretty quickly, wanting to find out what would happen next. His prose is florid and overwrought, as one might expect from this kind of romance, but well structured and intelligent. The problem for me is it's fairly joyless, and the two main characters are rather pitiful (Kip) or detestable (Thaddeus). It's an interesting choice to make Thaddeus, the object of Kips ardor, be so unlikeable, but that's something of the point, even Kip recognizes the depths to which Thaddeus sinks, but he loves him all the same. Kip meanwhile is just as single-minded in his love as he is in his determination to remain in the closet. I'm not saying there aren't many people like this in the world (although at one point, Kip wonders that very thing, or if he is the only one) but it's rather difficult to read about someone in that situation.
An Ocean Without a Shore charts the downfall of two men, but the ending isn't a bummer. Kip definitely hits a low point, but it's one that looks to finally be turning around. And Thaddeus? Well, I don't much care what happens to Thaddeus, so there's that. As a romantic melodrama, it definitely works, but I can't say that I really enjoyed it.
Kip and Thaddeus have been friends since college. Best friends. In fact, Kip has been infatuated with Thaddeus since the moment they met, to the point of feeling such an intense love for this man, he couldn't allow himself to ever fall in love with anyone else for fear of disappointment. The problem is, Kip is a deeply closeted homosexual, and Thaddeus is straight. With the exception one a drunken blowjob in college, this one-sided relationship remains just that throughout the bulk of the novel which ends with the men in their 50's. Kip becomes successful working for an investment firm in NYC, while Thaddeus writes a screenplay for a successful movie, makes a lot of money, spends it all on a sprawling mansion on the Hudson, and begins a slow financial decline struggling to reproduce his lightning-quick success. He's also married with two children.
Spencer writes a compelling enough novel; I read it pretty quickly, wanting to find out what would happen next. His prose is florid and overwrought, as one might expect from this kind of romance, but well structured and intelligent. The problem for me is it's fairly joyless, and the two main characters are rather pitiful (Kip) or detestable (Thaddeus). It's an interesting choice to make Thaddeus, the object of Kips ardor, be so unlikeable, but that's something of the point, even Kip recognizes the depths to which Thaddeus sinks, but he loves him all the same. Kip meanwhile is just as single-minded in his love as he is in his determination to remain in the closet. I'm not saying there aren't many people like this in the world (although at one point, Kip wonders that very thing, or if he is the only one) but it's rather difficult to read about someone in that situation.
An Ocean Without a Shore charts the downfall of two men, but the ending isn't a bummer. Kip definitely hits a low point, but it's one that looks to finally be turning around. And Thaddeus? Well, I don't much care what happens to Thaddeus, so there's that. As a romantic melodrama, it definitely works, but I can't say that I really enjoyed it.
September 24, 2022
Ho apprezzato questo libro, senza innamorarmene, ho trovato molto interessanti alcune riflessioni sull'amore non corrisposto, sull'amare un ideale e sul senso di possessività che si prova per la vita della persona che si ama ma che non ci ricambia. Non è un libro sull'ossessione, ma sulla lenta realizzazione di come questo amore stia svanendo. E lo fa con una scrittura a tratti fredda ma molto elegante, che non colpisce con forza, ma lo fa dal basso, quasi con cautela.
Kip, da vent'anni innamorato del suo migliore amico, Thaddeus, tende a nascondere la sua identità per non esporsi al giudizio altrui "le persone sono cattive, non esitano a farti del male."
Così, closeted, vive la sua vita, sentinella silenziosa dell'amico, che, francamente non viene dipinto con queste prodigiose qualità, anzi: uomo legato al denaro e all'approvazione altrui che usa come misura del proprio valore e che alla fine, non esita a far del male al suo migliore amico per il proprio tornaconto.
Questo libro ci dice quanto l'amore possa renderci deboli e ciechi, Kip stesso dice che "ognuno di noi, che lo sappia o meno, ha in dono una persona che lo ama senza condizioni, senza ragione, senza appello, senza guadagnarci nulla", come a voler giustificare la propria debolezza, quell'amare un ideale che vive solo nella sua immaginazione, il Thaddeus sofferente, gentile che si fa in quattro per mettere gli altri a proprio agio, finchè messo di fronte all'evidenza della bassezza dell'amico si chiede se lo avesse mai amato o se avesse passato la vita intrappolato in una bugia che si è raccontato per tanti anni; certo, poco dopo ci ricasca, perché lui stesso dice che amare qualcuno significa anche amare ciò che presenta di negativo. Eppure alla fine rinuncia a questo legame, quando capisce che Thaddeus ha sempre solo preso ciò che gli veniva dato, chiedendo ancora e ancora (in questo caso, denaro), così Kip rinuncia, prenditi tutto, gli dice, e forse capisce che la colpa è stata solo sua, liberandosi da questo amore sterile, ormai prosciugato.
Kip, da vent'anni innamorato del suo migliore amico, Thaddeus, tende a nascondere la sua identità per non esporsi al giudizio altrui "le persone sono cattive, non esitano a farti del male."
Così, closeted, vive la sua vita, sentinella silenziosa dell'amico, che, francamente non viene dipinto con queste prodigiose qualità, anzi: uomo legato al denaro e all'approvazione altrui che usa come misura del proprio valore e che alla fine, non esita a far del male al suo migliore amico per il proprio tornaconto.
Questo libro ci dice quanto l'amore possa renderci deboli e ciechi, Kip stesso dice che "ognuno di noi, che lo sappia o meno, ha in dono una persona che lo ama senza condizioni, senza ragione, senza appello, senza guadagnarci nulla", come a voler giustificare la propria debolezza, quell'amare un ideale che vive solo nella sua immaginazione, il Thaddeus sofferente, gentile che si fa in quattro per mettere gli altri a proprio agio, finchè messo di fronte all'evidenza della bassezza dell'amico si chiede se lo avesse mai amato o se avesse passato la vita intrappolato in una bugia che si è raccontato per tanti anni; certo, poco dopo ci ricasca, perché lui stesso dice che amare qualcuno significa anche amare ciò che presenta di negativo. Eppure alla fine rinuncia a questo legame, quando capisce che Thaddeus ha sempre solo preso ciò che gli veniva dato, chiedendo ancora e ancora (in questo caso, denaro), così Kip rinuncia, prenditi tutto, gli dice, e forse capisce che la colpa è stata solo sua, liberandosi da questo amore sterile, ormai prosciugato.
October 26, 2022
Buono l’impianto generale, mentre il finale lascia in parte interdett*. Gli sproloqui mentali e l’essere a tratti logorroico - ma solo nel proprio cervello, s’intende - del protagonista sono elementi godibilissimi. L’autore è consapevole di saper scrivere bene e di certo ci dà un libro di buona fattura stilistica. Però manca quel qualcosa in più che non è riuscito a farmi dire «che bella lettura» fino in fondo: emozione, pathos, costruzione dell’empatia? Non so individuarlo con precisione, ma di certo qualcosa è rimasto fuori.
May 29, 2022
Don't fall in love with your straight friend.
February 17, 2025
Sorta Saltburn but with grown ups and loads more longing.
June 18, 2021
A silent explosion of life.
Love and pain in all its forms and intensities.
This book reminded me so much of Hanya Hanagihara's Little Life.
At times it was difficult to continue reading because like life, I knew it would not be easy.
It is so human, so full of the mistakes that we all make in one way or another, so overflowing with dreams and expectations, and at times so cruel and unfair that it makes you want to escape from this fiction and also from reality.
The ending made me infuriated by the need for a little justice for Kip. Fuck that made me want to go into the history to get him at least a little of what he wants and needs.
Still, a declaration of love that will always be.
Excellent.
Superbly narrated audiobook.
Love and pain in all its forms and intensities.
This book reminded me so much of Hanya Hanagihara's Little Life.
At times it was difficult to continue reading because like life, I knew it would not be easy.
It is so human, so full of the mistakes that we all make in one way or another, so overflowing with dreams and expectations, and at times so cruel and unfair that it makes you want to escape from this fiction and also from reality.
The ending made me infuriated by the need for a little justice for Kip. Fuck that made me want to go into the history to get him at least a little of what he wants and needs.
Still, a declaration of love that will always be.
Excellent.
Superbly narrated audiobook.
February 1, 2023
Il dolore di una vita trascorsa nello struggimento.
Quando la sola colpa di un uomo è stata quella di lasciarsi invadere da un sentimento distorto e radicato.
Amare qualcuno che non ti ha mai visto, e non accorgersi di quanto questo prosciughi e laceri l’esistenza
Ma la passione è un oceano senza sponde, dove gli abissi ti accolgono e sembrano il più dolce dei giacigli, eppure non respiri.
Questo è il mio resoconto, che si è evoluto inizialmente con estrema lentezza, per poi sgorgare come, per l’appunto, un oceano senza sponde, negli ultimi capitoli, che per quanto mi concerne valgono l’intero libro.
Meravigliosi sono i pensieri del protagonista, voce narrante, esprimono pienamente tutta la sua essenza tormentata e tormentante (il lettore arriva ad ossessionarsi con lui, a fare proprio il suo tormento e a trattenere il respiro ogni qualvolta si manifesti l’opportunità di una svolta, di una rivelazione tanto attesa, di una presa di coraggio).
Cercate di giungere al termine di questa lettura, vi sazierà, vi renderà centellinando tutto quello che man mano strappa.
Quando la sola colpa di un uomo è stata quella di lasciarsi invadere da un sentimento distorto e radicato.
Amare qualcuno che non ti ha mai visto, e non accorgersi di quanto questo prosciughi e laceri l’esistenza
Ma la passione è un oceano senza sponde, dove gli abissi ti accolgono e sembrano il più dolce dei giacigli, eppure non respiri.
Questo è il mio resoconto, che si è evoluto inizialmente con estrema lentezza, per poi sgorgare come, per l’appunto, un oceano senza sponde, negli ultimi capitoli, che per quanto mi concerne valgono l’intero libro.
Meravigliosi sono i pensieri del protagonista, voce narrante, esprimono pienamente tutta la sua essenza tormentata e tormentante (il lettore arriva ad ossessionarsi con lui, a fare proprio il suo tormento e a trattenere il respiro ogni qualvolta si manifesti l’opportunità di una svolta, di una rivelazione tanto attesa, di una presa di coraggio).
Cercate di giungere al termine di questa lettura, vi sazierà, vi renderà centellinando tutto quello che man mano strappa.
November 11, 2023
Rep: gay mc, Jewish side character, Jewish gay side character, Black gay side character
September 18, 2022
Senza infamia e senza lode!
… ognuno di noi, che lo sappia o meno, ha in dono una persona che la ama senza condizioni, senza ragione, senza appello, e senza guadagnarci nulla, e per lui, per Thaddeus, per il mio povero amico dal cuore spezzato, quella persona ero io.
Forse mi aspettavo qualcosina in più. Sicuramente un libro molto scorrevole ma non banale, cosa non da poco nel panorama letterario contemporaneo, la caratterizzazione dei personaggi, le descrizioni dei tumulti interiori sono di certo dei punti a suo favore, quello che mi ha un po’ turbato durante il corso della lettura è stata la sensazione di stare leggendo qualcosa di vecchio. Ho dovuto consultare più volte la bibliografia dell’autore per accertarmi che fosse il suo ultimo romanzo edito nel 2022. Non so forse per il protagonista omosessuale non dichiarato che fa di tutto per tenere nascosto il suo orientamento nonostante non abbia nessun motivo per farlo (famiglia di origine, matrimonio, ambiente lavorativo ostile) o forse l’ambientazione in una villa “Jacksoniana” poco fuori il centro di New York, o forse ancora la modalità di interazione dei personaggi. Fatto sta che quando a metà libro si fa menzione alla sfida elettorale Gore-Bush sono rimasto molto sorpreso, l’avrei collocato almeno un trentennio prima come il più famoso titolo dell’autore.
Ecco com'è l'amore non corrisposto: non importa quante volte provi a ingoiare, la tua bocca è sempre piena.
Mi ha ricordato un po’ “La statua di sale” di Gore Vidal ma anche “Maurice” di Forster (se ci fate caso sto appunto citando due romanzi del secolo scorso) per la tematica dell’ossessione e dell’amore non dichiarato che attraversa i decenni fino alla sua massima esplosione. Sicuramente è un libro che andrà a infoltire gli scaffali della narrativa di genere (e giustamente, non solo per le tematiche che affronta ma anche e soprattutto per la qualità della prosa e l’eleganza dello stile) però ecco lo fa più in qualità di classico che come romanzo contemporaneo.
Ho appreso una delle lezioni della solitudine, uno dei suoi sconvolgenti effetti collaterali: quando versi in uno stato di brama inappagata, il desiderio va avanti all'infinito, come un oceano senza sponde.
… ognuno di noi, che lo sappia o meno, ha in dono una persona che la ama senza condizioni, senza ragione, senza appello, e senza guadagnarci nulla, e per lui, per Thaddeus, per il mio povero amico dal cuore spezzato, quella persona ero io.
Forse mi aspettavo qualcosina in più. Sicuramente un libro molto scorrevole ma non banale, cosa non da poco nel panorama letterario contemporaneo, la caratterizzazione dei personaggi, le descrizioni dei tumulti interiori sono di certo dei punti a suo favore, quello che mi ha un po’ turbato durante il corso della lettura è stata la sensazione di stare leggendo qualcosa di vecchio. Ho dovuto consultare più volte la bibliografia dell’autore per accertarmi che fosse il suo ultimo romanzo edito nel 2022. Non so forse per il protagonista omosessuale non dichiarato che fa di tutto per tenere nascosto il suo orientamento nonostante non abbia nessun motivo per farlo (famiglia di origine, matrimonio, ambiente lavorativo ostile) o forse l’ambientazione in una villa “Jacksoniana” poco fuori il centro di New York, o forse ancora la modalità di interazione dei personaggi. Fatto sta che quando a metà libro si fa menzione alla sfida elettorale Gore-Bush sono rimasto molto sorpreso, l’avrei collocato almeno un trentennio prima come il più famoso titolo dell’autore.
Ecco com'è l'amore non corrisposto: non importa quante volte provi a ingoiare, la tua bocca è sempre piena.
Mi ha ricordato un po’ “La statua di sale” di Gore Vidal ma anche “Maurice” di Forster (se ci fate caso sto appunto citando due romanzi del secolo scorso) per la tematica dell’ossessione e dell’amore non dichiarato che attraversa i decenni fino alla sua massima esplosione. Sicuramente è un libro che andrà a infoltire gli scaffali della narrativa di genere (e giustamente, non solo per le tematiche che affronta ma anche e soprattutto per la qualità della prosa e l’eleganza dello stile) però ecco lo fa più in qualità di classico che come romanzo contemporaneo.
Ho appreso una delle lezioni della solitudine, uno dei suoi sconvolgenti effetti collaterali: quando versi in uno stato di brama inappagata, il desiderio va avanti all'infinito, come un oceano senza sponde.
September 4, 2024
What. The. Fuck?
July 1, 2020
Scott Spencer knows a thing or two about thwarted love and frustrated longing. Thirty years or so ago, I marveled at his breakout book Endless Love, a ferociously sexual book about the obsessional love a teenage boy had for a girl named Jade and her family.
That unrequited and dangerous love is again mined in the author’s latest book, but this time, the characters are Kip Woods, who works at a high-end boutique investment firm, and his long-term obsession, Thaddeus Kaufman, a married screenwriter whose is on a downward financial trajectory.
Thaddeus is a charmer and a manipulator, who lives with his wife and two kids in an estate called Orkney that he can ill afford. Kip is a closeted gay man who has long lived under “the intricate nature of barricades and blind alleys” with which he had for virtually his entire life hidden his nature. Long ago, Thaddeus’ uncle—also gay—predicts to Kip that his nephew will destroy him. As readers, we know from the first few pages that Kip is waiting to be sentenced for—something. We know the dark trajectory this story will take but we don’t know the plot twists and details.
As we pay witness to Thaddeus’ incessant and sometimes cloying need for favor from his far more successful friend—who keeps his ardor for Thaddeus hidden—questions arise about the very nature of love and obsession. Does the yearning become its own reward—more satisfying than anything that could ever be achieved by moving on? Is each person allocated just one other who loves us without question, without reason, and without recourse—and what happens when that person does not reciprocate? Is the price of freedom from that kind of painful longing worth the ensuing feeling of emptiness?
Set against a backdrop of societal inequalities and money-worship gone amok, An Ocean Without A Shore begins rather slow and then gradually builds suspense and tension. Scott Spencer’s writing and insights are beautifully and sensitively rendered. At times, I wondered how the two key characters could be so blinded to each other’s real natures and why Kip would still be so enamored of his cloying friend, but that is part of the story: the pursuance of the love object becomes its own fathomless end. There is much to like and mull over here. A big thanks to Ecco, an imprint of HaperCollins, for the pleasure of being an early reader in exchange for an honest review.
That unrequited and dangerous love is again mined in the author’s latest book, but this time, the characters are Kip Woods, who works at a high-end boutique investment firm, and his long-term obsession, Thaddeus Kaufman, a married screenwriter whose is on a downward financial trajectory.
Thaddeus is a charmer and a manipulator, who lives with his wife and two kids in an estate called Orkney that he can ill afford. Kip is a closeted gay man who has long lived under “the intricate nature of barricades and blind alleys” with which he had for virtually his entire life hidden his nature. Long ago, Thaddeus’ uncle—also gay—predicts to Kip that his nephew will destroy him. As readers, we know from the first few pages that Kip is waiting to be sentenced for—something. We know the dark trajectory this story will take but we don’t know the plot twists and details.
As we pay witness to Thaddeus’ incessant and sometimes cloying need for favor from his far more successful friend—who keeps his ardor for Thaddeus hidden—questions arise about the very nature of love and obsession. Does the yearning become its own reward—more satisfying than anything that could ever be achieved by moving on? Is each person allocated just one other who loves us without question, without reason, and without recourse—and what happens when that person does not reciprocate? Is the price of freedom from that kind of painful longing worth the ensuing feeling of emptiness?
Set against a backdrop of societal inequalities and money-worship gone amok, An Ocean Without A Shore begins rather slow and then gradually builds suspense and tension. Scott Spencer’s writing and insights are beautifully and sensitively rendered. At times, I wondered how the two key characters could be so blinded to each other’s real natures and why Kip would still be so enamored of his cloying friend, but that is part of the story: the pursuance of the love object becomes its own fathomless end. There is much to like and mull over here. A big thanks to Ecco, an imprint of HaperCollins, for the pleasure of being an early reader in exchange for an honest review.
February 11, 2025
Sicuramente non bello quanto Un amore senza fine, ma altrettanto denso e ossessionato. Qui Spencer se la prende con ancora più calma, anche se c'è ben poco da disseminare. La tragedia è già scritta fin dall'inizio.
March 28, 2024
Ogni tanto mi capita un romanzo su questi amori impossibili che durano decenni.
Vorrebbero essere intensi e struggenti ma ho fatto troppa psicoterapia e autoanalisi (oltre ad esserci passato, per fortuna in tempi molto più brevi) per non trovare a ogni pagina enormi segnali di allarme, narcisismo, ossessione, disagio.
Questo non fa eccezione.
L'ambientazione americana, poi, e la fissazione continua per i soldi da parte di tutti i personaggi hanno solo aggiunto ulteriore fastidio alla lettura.
Vorrebbero essere intensi e struggenti ma ho fatto troppa psicoterapia e autoanalisi (oltre ad esserci passato, per fortuna in tempi molto più brevi) per non trovare a ogni pagina enormi segnali di allarme, narcisismo, ossessione, disagio.
Questo non fa eccezione.
L'ambientazione americana, poi, e la fissazione continua per i soldi da parte di tutti i personaggi hanno solo aggiunto ulteriore fastidio alla lettura.
June 24, 2020
Scott Spencer is on that short list of contemporary authors whose every book I read, but this novel does not work.
Spencer resurrects Thaddeus, one of the protagonists from River Under the Road and turns him into an objet du desir for Kip, one of the novel’s minor characters.
It’s one of those interesting authorial choices whose provenance one can’t help wondering about.
We live in an age where cultural appropriation is just about the very worst sin that anyone can commit! God forbid that you let your imagination take you for a single paragraph into the experiences of a character who isn’t your demographic clone.
So, you know, here’s Spencer whose breakout book contained one of the most graphic heterosexual intercourse-during-menstruation scenes ev-ah! writing nimbly about giving blowjobs. There is some cognitive dissonance. You can’t help wondering: Is he still on our team?
Thaddeus’s complex and ultimately failed marriage is the subject of River Under the Road—a book I liked because oh-my-GAWD, the town it takes place in is so obviously Rhinebeck and the ruined mansion Thaddeus buys, so obviously Rokeby. And I live just up the road!
An Ocean Without a Shore is about Kip’s lifelong romantic fixation with Thaddeus. I suppose my biggest problem with it—besides the indefinite article: C’mon, Scott, if it was River Under the Road, it should be Ocean Without a Shore— is that I don’t think romantic fixations last a lifetime for basically sane people. Even when they’re fueled by that kind of hopelessness that acts as an ultimate fixative and preservative.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. There is that brilliant scene in The Story of Adele H. where Adele in her ragged gown and mad hair sweeps right past the English soldier she’s been stalking for the past 20 years—and does not recognize him.
Or the famous story of the groupie who fucked every major and minor rock star in the British pop music pantheon and dismissed them all with: He’s okay, but he’s no Mick Jagger. And when she finally gets the chance to fuck Mick Jagger, guess what she says?
Kip, though, is presented as a basically sane person, so the basic premise of this endless love is all but impossible for me to accept.
Anyway, objet du desir seduces deeply closeted first-person protagonist in order to get his hands on insider stock trading info.
Protagonist beats up objet du desir.
Morbid romantic fixation ends!
I guess that’s a happy ending, right?
I don’t remember Thaddeus being such a sleaze in River Under the Road. I really am gonna have to reread that novel.
Spencer resurrects Thaddeus, one of the protagonists from River Under the Road and turns him into an objet du desir for Kip, one of the novel’s minor characters.
It’s one of those interesting authorial choices whose provenance one can’t help wondering about.
We live in an age where cultural appropriation is just about the very worst sin that anyone can commit! God forbid that you let your imagination take you for a single paragraph into the experiences of a character who isn’t your demographic clone.
So, you know, here’s Spencer whose breakout book contained one of the most graphic heterosexual intercourse-during-menstruation scenes ev-ah! writing nimbly about giving blowjobs. There is some cognitive dissonance. You can’t help wondering: Is he still on our team?
Thaddeus’s complex and ultimately failed marriage is the subject of River Under the Road—a book I liked because oh-my-GAWD, the town it takes place in is so obviously Rhinebeck and the ruined mansion Thaddeus buys, so obviously Rokeby. And I live just up the road!
An Ocean Without a Shore is about Kip’s lifelong romantic fixation with Thaddeus. I suppose my biggest problem with it—besides the indefinite article: C’mon, Scott, if it was River Under the Road, it should be Ocean Without a Shore— is that I don’t think romantic fixations last a lifetime for basically sane people. Even when they’re fueled by that kind of hopelessness that acts as an ultimate fixative and preservative.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. There is that brilliant scene in The Story of Adele H. where Adele in her ragged gown and mad hair sweeps right past the English soldier she’s been stalking for the past 20 years—and does not recognize him.
Or the famous story of the groupie who fucked every major and minor rock star in the British pop music pantheon and dismissed them all with: He’s okay, but he’s no Mick Jagger. And when she finally gets the chance to fuck Mick Jagger, guess what she says?
Kip, though, is presented as a basically sane person, so the basic premise of this endless love is all but impossible for me to accept.
Anyway, objet du desir seduces deeply closeted first-person protagonist in order to get his hands on insider stock trading info.
Protagonist beats up objet du desir.
Morbid romantic fixation ends!
I guess that’s a happy ending, right?
I don’t remember Thaddeus being such a sleaze in River Under the Road. I really am gonna have to reread that novel.
June 24, 2020
"Reading Scott Spencer’s work is an adventure in negative capability—an opportunity to fall, or dive, into a deeper world beyond good and evil, reason and faith, will and fate. The love, and acceptance he feels for his characters is endless, though not without a deep understanding of the many flaws— narcissism, inconstancy, faithlessness, greed—that flesh is heir to.
His latest novel, An Ocean Without A Shore (341 pages; Ecco Press), is a sequel of sorts to River Under the Road (2017), which took a hard look at the multiple misfortunes of Thaddeus Kaufman, a struggling novelist and screenwriter manqué, living an outwardly enviable life in upper Hudson Valley, with his artist wife, Grace Cornell."
My notice, for ZYZZYVA magazine, is linked below:
https://www.zyzzyva.org/2020/06/24/lo...
His latest novel, An Ocean Without A Shore (341 pages; Ecco Press), is a sequel of sorts to River Under the Road (2017), which took a hard look at the multiple misfortunes of Thaddeus Kaufman, a struggling novelist and screenwriter manqué, living an outwardly enviable life in upper Hudson Valley, with his artist wife, Grace Cornell."
My notice, for ZYZZYVA magazine, is linked below:
https://www.zyzzyva.org/2020/06/24/lo...
May 22, 2020
By the end of this book I was exhausted. The follies of unrequited love that lasted 300 plus pages. Kip has been a closet gay all his life. Since college he has carried a full out full blown secret love for his friend Thaddeus. For the next 30 years as he makes a career for himself he watches Thaddeus have one major writing success then nothing. Even when Kip “sees” Thaddeus for what he truly his he can’t not love him. The accumulation of that 30 year love finally erupts and burns.
I just wasn’t moved by this story. I think it was well written with several good quotes and descriptions I just wasn’t invested.
I just wasn’t moved by this story. I think it was well written with several good quotes and descriptions I just wasn’t invested.
July 4, 2020
“I have learned one of the lessons of loneliness, one of its shocking side effects, desire goes on and on, like an ocean without a shore.”
A beautifully written meditation on the dangers of wasting your life wishing and hoping for someone you can never have. Kip’s story captures the self-delusion we find ourselves intwined in as we continue to believe, despite everything, that a relationship might still be possible. Many of the book’s nuances hit very near the bone for me. Can’t stop thinking about it.
A beautifully written meditation on the dangers of wasting your life wishing and hoping for someone you can never have. Kip’s story captures the self-delusion we find ourselves intwined in as we continue to believe, despite everything, that a relationship might still be possible. Many of the book’s nuances hit very near the bone for me. Can’t stop thinking about it.
January 1, 2024
Follow-up read to my very recent discovery of Scott Spencer's 'Endless Love' (not exactly "discovery" - it sold millions of copies and was made into two movies but totally unknown to me).
It's always a little iffy to read book #2 by a newly discovered author, expectations are generally too high. Interesting in this case though that these two novels are about 40 years apart.
Spencer wrote Endless Love at 34 and Ocean without a Shore at 75 (!) so it's not really the same person, I thought, but then there's something quite similar, the style has changed of course but there's also continuity. In a way, this book's title could have also been 'endless love' - the more mature version, where people are married with kids and have financial problems. But in essence it's the same story - a great but totally irrational love (isn't any love?) that leads to inevitable ruin (in both books ending before the court).
Anyhow, I loved this book too, also it's actually quite funny. Also appreciated the setting - NYC in the 90s and 2000s with the financialization of everything (the main character is a Wallstreet dude) and of course 9/11 and the wars that followed. I wouldn't go as far as to say that it's a bit of a critique of late capitalism but the book doesn't let you ignore the context either.
Side note: I've got a weird superstition about the last/first book I read in a year (which I cannot further elaborate for it's rather ridiculous) so this is setting me on a very good course for 2024 (gee, can we get over the new year stuff already?)!
Love is evil.
It's always a little iffy to read book #2 by a newly discovered author, expectations are generally too high. Interesting in this case though that these two novels are about 40 years apart.
Spencer wrote Endless Love at 34 and Ocean without a Shore at 75 (!) so it's not really the same person, I thought, but then there's something quite similar, the style has changed of course but there's also continuity. In a way, this book's title could have also been 'endless love' - the more mature version, where people are married with kids and have financial problems. But in essence it's the same story - a great but totally irrational love (isn't any love?) that leads to inevitable ruin (in both books ending before the court).
Anyhow, I loved this book too, also it's actually quite funny. Also appreciated the setting - NYC in the 90s and 2000s with the financialization of everything (the main character is a Wallstreet dude) and of course 9/11 and the wars that followed. I wouldn't go as far as to say that it's a bit of a critique of late capitalism but the book doesn't let you ignore the context either.
Side note: I've got a weird superstition about the last/first book I read in a year (which I cannot further elaborate for it's rather ridiculous) so this is setting me on a very good course for 2024 (gee, can we get over the new year stuff already?)!
Love is evil.
July 13, 2024
Proverò a scrivere una recensione su questo libero ma sarà dura. È difficile leggere di sentimenti che tu stesso, in prima persona, hai sperimentato sulla tua pelle. È logorante vedere dall’esterno come appare un essere umano che non riesce ad andare oltre all’idea che si è creato di un altra persona. Mi ha fatto un male assurdo, non riesco nemmeno a spiegarlo!
È il primo approccio con l’autore e ho amato la sua scrittura, le descrizioni, la caratterizzazione dei personaggi, tutto. L’ho letteralmente divorato in due giorni. Leggetelo, dategli una possibilità, sopratutto se nella vita avete sperimentato un sentimento totalizzante verso un altra persona (o se siete semplicemente dei sottoni come me)
È il primo approccio con l’autore e ho amato la sua scrittura, le descrizioni, la caratterizzazione dei personaggi, tutto. L’ho letteralmente divorato in due giorni. Leggetelo, dategli una possibilità, sopratutto se nella vita avete sperimentato un sentimento totalizzante verso un altra persona (o se siete semplicemente dei sottoni come me)
March 2, 2023
Mixed emotions...
An Ocean Without a Shore tells the story of Kip, a closeted-gay-man who is in love with his straight friend Thaddeus. Thaddeus is married, has two children and owns a very peculiar yet charming house surrounded by what he describes as a beautiful and inspiring forest. You would think he is happy living his life; however, he is filled with greed, hatred and in need of constant praise. On top of this, he has developed an aggressive obsession with money. He is stuck in what feels like an endless debt and according to him, no one is helping him finance anything. Kip, the ever loving and caring friend, takes action in helping Thaddeus financially in any way he can. First, by buying some acres from the property and then later by putting his own job and life at risk by providing him a hint as to which company/service to invest in and hopefully win some shares.
It is almost at the end of the book, after Thaddeus loses both of his parents, that Kip realizes that he had always been taken advantage of by Thaddeus. Thaddeus, (at least to the reader), had always known Kip's love for him was that not of a friend, but of a lover. Kip had devoted half of his life to securing his dear friend, or at least that was what he believed.
Warned by some other characters, Kip still allowed himself to be used and disposed of by Thaddeus; making him a very weak character. Even knowing what the story would be about, I had high hopes for a tremendous character development, which did not happen. Even after the incident in the hotel room, Kip still writes his true feelings in a letter, and fails to fully forget them. I expected more... to some extent I would have honestly been fine with the idea of Kip murdering Thaddeus.
The pain and longing, desire and passion were exquisitely expressed in the writing of the novel. I think Scott Spencer did an amazing job writing this novel. I just wish it had a more complete feeling to the end... I felt miserable for Kip, but also angry at him for ignoring the many 'red flags' of Thaddeus.
The book is fantastic, a very wholesome and complicated read. It is something worthy of adding to your 'To read' pile. I think there was still something very special in this story.
An Ocean Without a Shore tells the story of Kip, a closeted-gay-man who is in love with his straight friend Thaddeus. Thaddeus is married, has two children and owns a very peculiar yet charming house surrounded by what he describes as a beautiful and inspiring forest. You would think he is happy living his life; however, he is filled with greed, hatred and in need of constant praise. On top of this, he has developed an aggressive obsession with money. He is stuck in what feels like an endless debt and according to him, no one is helping him finance anything. Kip, the ever loving and caring friend, takes action in helping Thaddeus financially in any way he can. First, by buying some acres from the property and then later by putting his own job and life at risk by providing him a hint as to which company/service to invest in and hopefully win some shares.
It is almost at the end of the book, after Thaddeus loses both of his parents, that Kip realizes that he had always been taken advantage of by Thaddeus. Thaddeus, (at least to the reader), had always known Kip's love for him was that not of a friend, but of a lover. Kip had devoted half of his life to securing his dear friend, or at least that was what he believed.
Warned by some other characters, Kip still allowed himself to be used and disposed of by Thaddeus; making him a very weak character. Even knowing what the story would be about, I had high hopes for a tremendous character development, which did not happen. Even after the incident in the hotel room, Kip still writes his true feelings in a letter, and fails to fully forget them. I expected more... to some extent I would have honestly been fine with the idea of Kip murdering Thaddeus.
The pain and longing, desire and passion were exquisitely expressed in the writing of the novel. I think Scott Spencer did an amazing job writing this novel. I just wish it had a more complete feeling to the end... I felt miserable for Kip, but also angry at him for ignoring the many 'red flags' of Thaddeus.
The book is fantastic, a very wholesome and complicated read. It is something worthy of adding to your 'To read' pile. I think there was still something very special in this story.
February 24, 2023
“Desire fulfilled becomes a referendum on itself.”
I didn’t really like the plot of this novel, especially the way everything resolved because I don’t fully understand how we got from the climactic incident to the resolution. However, there’s lots of interesting musings in here about desire and love and friendship and time.
I didn’t really like the plot of this novel, especially the way everything resolved because I don’t fully understand how we got from the climactic incident to the resolution. However, there’s lots of interesting musings in here about desire and love and friendship and time.
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