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Unladylike: A Grrrl's Guide to Wrestling
Forget what you think you know about wrestling. In the world of Heather Honeybadger, aka Rana Venenosa, there are no steroids, no tans, no million-dollar contracts - there is only lycra, a sweaty underground club and an unbreakable resilience. From the day that Heather steps into the ring of the punk wrestling school Lucha Britannia, she finds herself transformed into a person she never knew she could be. How do you become a wrestler when you hate sports so much you can't do a press-up? What makes feminists and wrestlers both mortal enemies and unlikely best friends? For the first time, an independent female wrestler talks in depth about how she went from a sad, lost riot grrrl to an empowered, persevering fighter who has performed across the world. Unladylike is a feminist romp like no other - hard-hitting, life-affirming and funny, just like the women who find themselves in the ring.
312 pages, Paperback
Published July 11, 2019
2 people are currently reading
49 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews
January 1, 2026
A honest look
At wrestling in all its forms, the big dogs in WWE, Indies, me, women, and non binary wrestlers.
Also the personal journey of one person who found what they needed in wrestling and the ups and downs it and life brought.
A very different and fascinating look into the Wrestling world.
At wrestling in all its forms, the big dogs in WWE, Indies, me, women, and non binary wrestlers.
Also the personal journey of one person who found what they needed in wrestling and the ups and downs it and life brought.
A very different and fascinating look into the Wrestling world.
January 17, 2020
Reading this book was a refresher. It's witty and in your face.
The Book is about a young lady who went by two names in the ring.
Heather Honeybadger during her beginning wrestling career and then La Rana Venenosa (poison frog) towards the middle of her wrestling career. It follows her life in the U.K. and her quest to finding herself through wrestling. It was great to read about indie wrestling and also seeing her make waves as a woman wrestler in the U.K. It's a fascinating story of finding yourself, working hard to get where you want, and finding what makes you happy.She talks about gender issues, personal identity, sex, and being confident within yourself. Also one of the biggest issues being a woman in a male dominated world. But she did an amazing job making a name for herself and putting the doubts of those behind people's minds. Today you have women wrestlers that main evented major PPV's, have fought against men, and overall have created a women's revolution in the wrestling world.
I was very familiar with the terminology as my husband is a professional wrestler. I've been around indy wrestling and can vouch for what goes on behind the scenes. The Politics, the gossip etc. I've been a huge wrestling fan since I was in 3rd grade, I'm 32 years old now and still am a huge fan of it. I'm so happy that the author decided to share her story with us, and I wish her continuous success.
Thank you to NetGalley for a copy of this book in a exchange for an honest review.
The Book is about a young lady who went by two names in the ring.
Heather Honeybadger during her beginning wrestling career and then La Rana Venenosa (poison frog) towards the middle of her wrestling career. It follows her life in the U.K. and her quest to finding herself through wrestling. It was great to read about indie wrestling and also seeing her make waves as a woman wrestler in the U.K. It's a fascinating story of finding yourself, working hard to get where you want, and finding what makes you happy.She talks about gender issues, personal identity, sex, and being confident within yourself. Also one of the biggest issues being a woman in a male dominated world. But she did an amazing job making a name for herself and putting the doubts of those behind people's minds. Today you have women wrestlers that main evented major PPV's, have fought against men, and overall have created a women's revolution in the wrestling world.
I was very familiar with the terminology as my husband is a professional wrestler. I've been around indy wrestling and can vouch for what goes on behind the scenes. The Politics, the gossip etc. I've been a huge wrestling fan since I was in 3rd grade, I'm 32 years old now and still am a huge fan of it. I'm so happy that the author decided to share her story with us, and I wish her continuous success.
Thank you to NetGalley for a copy of this book in a exchange for an honest review.
July 25, 2019
Short version: This is a great book. Snappy and very readable.
Long version: This is a book which asks some very awkward questions. Not just about how women are viewed in wrestling, but how they are treated in wider society and the very difficult implications of that treatment. It raises some very tricky points about female physicality- how women's bodies are viewed and valued.
It is a book about wrestling, and gives some fantastic insights into the UK indie wrestling scene. The characters are presented warts and all, but please don't mistake it as an axe grinding session, because it certainly isn't.
The author takes us on a very interesting journey through her wrestling training, we see her grow as a wrestling performer and as a person throughout the book. Dealing with the malaise of the millennial experience and finding solace in wrestling. Philosophically, the book is best described as Existential Radical Feminism. But if you don't know/care what those words mean, you'll still enjoy it.
Unladylike is the perfect example of a biography of the everyday (although being a wrestler isn't exactly an "everyday" vocation!), a look at the lives of non-celebrity people, their growth and arcs.
The book forms a strange venn diagram between "Feminist literature" and "Wrestling Books", but somehow it works. And it works very well.
Well worth your time and a very hard book to put down.
Long version: This is a book which asks some very awkward questions. Not just about how women are viewed in wrestling, but how they are treated in wider society and the very difficult implications of that treatment. It raises some very tricky points about female physicality- how women's bodies are viewed and valued.
It is a book about wrestling, and gives some fantastic insights into the UK indie wrestling scene. The characters are presented warts and all, but please don't mistake it as an axe grinding session, because it certainly isn't.
The author takes us on a very interesting journey through her wrestling training, we see her grow as a wrestling performer and as a person throughout the book. Dealing with the malaise of the millennial experience and finding solace in wrestling. Philosophically, the book is best described as Existential Radical Feminism. But if you don't know/care what those words mean, you'll still enjoy it.
Unladylike is the perfect example of a biography of the everyday (although being a wrestler isn't exactly an "everyday" vocation!), a look at the lives of non-celebrity people, their growth and arcs.
The book forms a strange venn diagram between "Feminist literature" and "Wrestling Books", but somehow it works. And it works very well.
Well worth your time and a very hard book to put down.
July 2, 2019
This book is brilliant! I've read dozens of books on wrestling and almost none of them examine the subject in a way that's so relatable. It's moving, funny and an portrayal of what it's like being a woman in wrestling, a subject that needs more books like this.
January 7, 2021
This book is wonderful. A love letter to the world of underground wrestling, feminism and womanhood in general, I loved every single page. I was so inspired, I'd power slammed my boyfriend three times before I'd even finished reading the blurb, this book kicks ass.
December 18, 2019
I have been a fan of wrestling since I was a little girl. I grew up watching the likes of The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin and Degeneration X. I grew up wanting to be a woman’s wrestler, to follow in the footsteps of Chyna, Trish Stratus and Lita.
As time went on, I realised that I would never accomplish this dream. One, I suffer from excruciating back pain at least once a month and two, I would never fit the mould that WWE ever wanted for women wrestlers.
Heather Von Bandenburg opened my eyes to a new world of wrestling in this book. While I knew that smaller organisations existed, having watched ‘indie’ matches on YouTube, it was interesting to read her journey into Lucha wrestling. I loved the transformation of Heather and her in-ring personas. Heather never gave up on her dream even when it seemed like the world and her body were seemingly against her.
Heather also highlights how hard it is for females in this industry. Women are treated differently in the ring and up until a few years ago women were seen as ‘divas’ whose matches were mainly for men to take a toilet break or enjoy the eye-candy. It breaks my heart to see how much the women in this book struggled to make it big, struggled to even start their own group because they weren’t seen as important. While I am impressed with the change in women’s wrestling in the bigger companies such as WWE, there still need to be a lot more improvement.
I think this book needs to be read by young women who are looking to start wrestling, whether for fun or to make it to the big leagues. Heather Von Bandenburg does not hold back in this book and I honestly admire her for that. She enjoys what she is doing and it really shows in this book.
I really do recommend this book for any wrestling fan. It gives you an insight to starting out that most wrestler’s autobiographies tend to ignore. Bandenburg has a way of sucking you into this universe and making you feel as if you were on this journey with her. It was honestly everything I didn’t know I needed in my life.
Thank you to NetGalley and Unbound for providing me with a copy of the book in exchange for an honest review.
As time went on, I realised that I would never accomplish this dream. One, I suffer from excruciating back pain at least once a month and two, I would never fit the mould that WWE ever wanted for women wrestlers.
Heather Von Bandenburg opened my eyes to a new world of wrestling in this book. While I knew that smaller organisations existed, having watched ‘indie’ matches on YouTube, it was interesting to read her journey into Lucha wrestling. I loved the transformation of Heather and her in-ring personas. Heather never gave up on her dream even when it seemed like the world and her body were seemingly against her.
Heather also highlights how hard it is for females in this industry. Women are treated differently in the ring and up until a few years ago women were seen as ‘divas’ whose matches were mainly for men to take a toilet break or enjoy the eye-candy. It breaks my heart to see how much the women in this book struggled to make it big, struggled to even start their own group because they weren’t seen as important. While I am impressed with the change in women’s wrestling in the bigger companies such as WWE, there still need to be a lot more improvement.
I think this book needs to be read by young women who are looking to start wrestling, whether for fun or to make it to the big leagues. Heather Von Bandenburg does not hold back in this book and I honestly admire her for that. She enjoys what she is doing and it really shows in this book.
I really do recommend this book for any wrestling fan. It gives you an insight to starting out that most wrestler’s autobiographies tend to ignore. Bandenburg has a way of sucking you into this universe and making you feel as if you were on this journey with her. It was honestly everything I didn’t know I needed in my life.
Thank you to NetGalley and Unbound for providing me with a copy of the book in exchange for an honest review.
July 28, 2019
Lifting the lid on wrestling and baring her soul in one swoop, Heather Bandenburg digs deep into her own self doubt, fears, and physical frailties, relentlessly tested on her way to personal transformation and wrestling greatness as Rana Venenosa - The Poison Frog.
Falling into the friendly brutality of the world of lucha libre wrestling by accident, and following an often haphazard trajectory, somehow its cameraderie, ungainly elegance, caring violence and cathartic showmanship raised her up from times of despair and illness, and brought her to find self love and self acceptance. Firmly grounded in feminism, her account shines a light on women's struggle for a serious place in the sport, its secretive rules of performance and drama, and some of the colourful key characters and exciting developments in wrestling today. Her writing style is pithy and her humour sharp, and there is a delightful bonus reference section with diagrams of holds and a herstory of wrestling.
A happy epilogue: there's a tadpole on the way :)
Falling into the friendly brutality of the world of lucha libre wrestling by accident, and following an often haphazard trajectory, somehow its cameraderie, ungainly elegance, caring violence and cathartic showmanship raised her up from times of despair and illness, and brought her to find self love and self acceptance. Firmly grounded in feminism, her account shines a light on women's struggle for a serious place in the sport, its secretive rules of performance and drama, and some of the colourful key characters and exciting developments in wrestling today. Her writing style is pithy and her humour sharp, and there is a delightful bonus reference section with diagrams of holds and a herstory of wrestling.
A happy epilogue: there's a tadpole on the way :)
July 25, 2019
This is a light and enjoyable read that packs a serious punch, a life and love story that is also a disquisition on wrestling. It had me variously smiling or pensive in recognition, weeping in empathy, wincing with pain and laughing out loud. I have never been a wrestling fan, but, as a trainee midwife, I am fascinated by women's stories, the human condition, the varied paths of self-discovery. Any person could identify with the challenges the author faced, her struggles with self-belief, self-determination and acceptance. This book would be a fabulous resource for schools, easily generating discussions around those topics as well as on sexuality, gender norms and expectations, mental and physical health and safety and the fact that we don't have to accept the labels others give us. Buy it for yourself, your friends or the teenagers in your life. We all know someone who would appreciate this book.
February 22, 2021
A great read, had me hooked so I went through it in one take. What really got me was how unconventional this was. I'm a wrestling fan, the book is written by a wrestler, but it appeals to non-wrestlers and is easily approachable without any prior knowledge or even interest related to wrestling. It's far from an (auto)biography or collection of road stories, like so many books written by or about wrestlers usually are. It really feels like you're sitting down with somebody who's talking to you, from the heart. Part life story and introspection, part history of the indie UK scene, part dissection of the business from a refreshingly feminist viewpoint, it even comes with appendixes like a shorty history of wrestling, illustrations of moves and a lexicon of slang/jargon.
June 27, 2020
Unladylike was a book swap with a friend (who happens to be friends with the author).
•
Great memoir/cultural book about Heather’s life entwined with the world of wrestling.
•
A bit of a wrestling for dummies guide. Heather talks about rediscovering wrestling as an adult; discussing how male dominated the sport is despite women having played a major part in its history. Wrestlemania made the sport explode worldwide yet outside of that bubble, the sport very much remains semi-pro/amateur.
•
Finding a place, an entertainment-sport, a community where she felt she fitted in for being entirely who she was; feminism and stereotypes, navigating a male dominated industry where women are deemed lesser than their male counterparts; creating her alter-ego, the transformation of women’s professional wrestling; overcoming health issues and a sense of community found through sport.
•
Great memoir/cultural book about Heather’s life entwined with the world of wrestling.
•
A bit of a wrestling for dummies guide. Heather talks about rediscovering wrestling as an adult; discussing how male dominated the sport is despite women having played a major part in its history. Wrestlemania made the sport explode worldwide yet outside of that bubble, the sport very much remains semi-pro/amateur.
•
Finding a place, an entertainment-sport, a community where she felt she fitted in for being entirely who she was; feminism and stereotypes, navigating a male dominated industry where women are deemed lesser than their male counterparts; creating her alter-ego, the transformation of women’s professional wrestling; overcoming health issues and a sense of community found through sport.
June 28, 2020
Just as much an insight into the life of women athletes and counter culture London as it is about wrestling.
March 25, 2023
Not just for wrestling fans.
April 27, 2025
Pleasantly surprised, wasn’t expecting to enjoy a memoir about wrestling so much
August 20, 2019
I thoroughly enjoyed this smart, witty and, at times, hard-hitting memoir about a young woman finding her identity and her place in the world through her absorption into the wrestling world.
Because, whilst Unladylike is a fascinating glimpse behind the scenes of London’s indie wrestling scene, it’s also an incredibly identifiable personal story about finding what makes you happy, and coming to terms with the varied aspects of your own personality and your place in the world. Heather is unflinching in her portrayal and touches on issues of gender, sexuality, personal identity, self-belief, confidence and anxiety as she discusses her involvement and development within the world of female wrestling.
She also offers a considered examination of the trials that come with defining yourself as a woman in a male-dominated environment, casting a critically appraising eye over the history of women in the sport, and the struggles that many of them still face today.
Full of anecdotes and packed with fascinating details of life behind the scenes, Unladylike is also a riot to read. By turns funny, self-deprecating, insightful, it’s packed with sharp observational humour that makes for an easy, page-turning read. Sort of the reading equivalent of sharing a few drinks at the pub with a friend!
There’s also a series of great appendices at the end of the book explaining common wrestling terms, providing a brief history of female wrestling, and offering diagrams of moves – it was a useful addition that quickly helped to explain any terminology and really helped me appreciate the effort and skill that goes into each and every wrestling match.
A fascinating biography that offers a unique combination of personal memoir, sporting anecdotes, and feminist critique, Unladylike is a witty and enjoyable read that packs a surprising punch. Wrestling fans will, naturally, find much to enjoy here but, for those of us not familiar with the sport, Unladylike still has plenty to offer. If you’re looking for something a little unusual to add to your reading list, then you won’t go far wrong with this.
NB: This is an edited version of a review that first appeared on my blog at https://theshelfofunreadbooks.wordpre.... My thanks go to the author for providing a copy of the book in return for an honest and unbiased review.
Because, whilst Unladylike is a fascinating glimpse behind the scenes of London’s indie wrestling scene, it’s also an incredibly identifiable personal story about finding what makes you happy, and coming to terms with the varied aspects of your own personality and your place in the world. Heather is unflinching in her portrayal and touches on issues of gender, sexuality, personal identity, self-belief, confidence and anxiety as she discusses her involvement and development within the world of female wrestling.
She also offers a considered examination of the trials that come with defining yourself as a woman in a male-dominated environment, casting a critically appraising eye over the history of women in the sport, and the struggles that many of them still face today.
Full of anecdotes and packed with fascinating details of life behind the scenes, Unladylike is also a riot to read. By turns funny, self-deprecating, insightful, it’s packed with sharp observational humour that makes for an easy, page-turning read. Sort of the reading equivalent of sharing a few drinks at the pub with a friend!
There’s also a series of great appendices at the end of the book explaining common wrestling terms, providing a brief history of female wrestling, and offering diagrams of moves – it was a useful addition that quickly helped to explain any terminology and really helped me appreciate the effort and skill that goes into each and every wrestling match.
A fascinating biography that offers a unique combination of personal memoir, sporting anecdotes, and feminist critique, Unladylike is a witty and enjoyable read that packs a surprising punch. Wrestling fans will, naturally, find much to enjoy here but, for those of us not familiar with the sport, Unladylike still has plenty to offer. If you’re looking for something a little unusual to add to your reading list, then you won’t go far wrong with this.
NB: This is an edited version of a review that first appeared on my blog at https://theshelfofunreadbooks.wordpre.... My thanks go to the author for providing a copy of the book in return for an honest and unbiased review.
June 26, 2019
A wonderful book for fans of wrestling, growth journeys and funny anecdotes, and you don't need to know a thing about wrestling to enjoy it.
I'm a wrestling fan so I was looking forward to learning more about the London indy scene and the steps one must take from 1st training session to appearing in front of 1000 people on a major show, and this book did not disappoint. But its more than that, its really about believing in yourself, pushing yourself and being honest with yourself to try and grow, despite life just being damn hard at times.
Heather has a great writing style, I am a fan of dry delivery in absurd situations and this book managed that often. Fully recommended to feminists and wrestling fans, not something you hear often.
I'm a wrestling fan so I was looking forward to learning more about the London indy scene and the steps one must take from 1st training session to appearing in front of 1000 people on a major show, and this book did not disappoint. But its more than that, its really about believing in yourself, pushing yourself and being honest with yourself to try and grow, despite life just being damn hard at times.
Heather has a great writing style, I am a fan of dry delivery in absurd situations and this book managed that often. Fully recommended to feminists and wrestling fans, not something you hear often.
July 25, 2019
Heather Bandeburg's memoir about her life as wrestler on the London underground Lucha scene is as hilarious as it is insightful into the world of participating in a male-dominated sport as a young, feminist woman with endometriosis.
I absolutely breezed through this book and would recommend it as a summer holiday read, or as a gift to young adolescent women who need a confidence boost to achieve their goals.
I absolutely breezed through this book and would recommend it as a summer holiday read, or as a gift to young adolescent women who need a confidence boost to achieve their goals.
July 24, 2019
Absolutely amazing read, takes you through Heather's Journey and is a page turner, I'm not a big reader and I read it in under 2 days.
Heather's book has made me realise what wrestling is not just the WWE take on it.
Heather's book has made me realise what wrestling is not just the WWE take on it.
July 26, 2019
Such an interesting book. I knew nothing about wrestling but I found the wrestling parts easy to access and interesting, and I'm always interested in hearing about women's experiences and using that to develop my own feminism.
July 24, 2019
Loved it!
August 24, 2019
An insightful to a weird and wacky world I've admired from afar on TV and never knew existed so close by. Heather is a hero.
December 24, 2019
This was fantastic. I learned a huge amount about wrestling and gender politics and it was vastly entertaining. I am not a wrestling fan, but this made me want to actually go to a show. Brilliant.
Displaying 1 - 21 of 21 reviews