Let It Go

by Peter Walsh

Say goodbye to clutter, reduce stress, and live simply with this easy-to-use guide to downsizing!Whether you are selling your family home, blending households into a new home, or cleaning out your aging parents’ home, sorting through a lifetime’s worth of accumulated possessions can be a daunting and stressful experience. Decluttering guru Peter Walsh recently went through the process of downsizing his childhood home and dividing his late parents’ possessions among his family. He realized that making these decisions about mementos and heirlooms creates strong emotions and can be an overwhelming chore.In Let It Go, Peter will help you turn downsizing into a rejuvenating life change with his useful tips and practical takeaways, including howUnderstand the emotional challenges that accompany downsizingEstablish a hierarchy of mementos and collectiblesCalculate the amount of stuff you can bring into your new lifeCreate strategies for dividing heirlooms among family members without dramaThis new phase brings unexpected freedoms and opportunities, and Peter walks you through every step of the process. You’ll feel freer and happier than you ever thought possible once you Let It Go.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Audiobook, How To, Personal Development, Psychology, Lifestyle

256 pages, Paperback

Published January 7, 2020

About the author

Born and raised in Australia, Peter moved to Los Angeles in 1994 to launch a corporation to help organizations improve employee’s job satisfaction and effectiveness. He considers himself to be part-contractor, part-therapist in his approach to helping individuals attain their goals.

When not wading through clutter and large-scale disorganization, Peter divides his time between his work in Los Angeles and visiting Australia as frequently as possible. Peter’s passions include mid-century architecture and design, home renovation and transforming chaos into order.

Reviews

[Regina · Rating 2 out of 5]

I dunno, I don't think I learned anything new from this. My husband and I are downsizing our current household, so I listened to the audiobook more as encouragement while purging useless items. My grievance with the last Peter Walsh book I read was that he just said to throw things away, whereas here he goes into a little more detail in regards to steps to take before reaching that point. But ultimately I already know that I can donate items or sell them on Craigslist. Also, I don't really appreciate that he's riding the "Let it Go" wave (and even mentions the song at one point). He also quotes the amazing "Get busy living, or get busy dying" line from Shawshank Redemption. Come on, come up with your own hooks man. Meh.

[Stacia · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ok, so this reading actually dovetails nicely with (the new-ish trend in decluttering) Swedish Death Cleaning as this particular book focuses mainly on people who are downsizing their own possessions & house size or having to downsize for their parents (who may have moved into assisted living or similar circumstances) or who are dealing with quickly having to downsize after a parent or parents pass away.

I like Peter Walsh, I've read at least one of his other books (maybe more than one), have flipped through at least one or two more, & I used to like his tv show on HGTV that was on eons ago.

He has some helpful things in there & some exercises to do/think about that will help you define what legacy you want to leave. Even though this is a short book, I think it could have been written, organized, & presented in a better, cleaner, more streamlined format. He mainly focuses on defining your treasures (things that are truly valued by you & that show your values to those who will be dealing with your stuff after you die) & defining your worthy items (daily or needed items such as clothing, dishes, etc.). He, naturally, also emphasizes (as he does in every book or tv program he's on) that you have a finite amount of space & you can't physically fit more stuff into a set amount of space.

Eh, overall ok. I would have liked a better design & layout, along w/ better editing to really emphasize his core points. Sadly, I think his message is diluted because it gets lost among the other more filler-like stuff.

(Peter, I'll be your editor for your next book. Just contact me here & we can coordinate a work plan!)

[Ms. Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book offered concrete, practical advice on dealing with clutter. He tackles some of the emotional issues like guilt in dealing with excess things and his advice helped me to let go of some items. It's also inspired me to display some treasures and I'm working on shadow boxes and other ways to display treasured items in my home.

[Heidi Thorsen · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is specifically for people who need to downsize either their own home or their parents' home. I don't have to downsize, but I read it anyway since I *want* to get rid of a significant amount of stuff in my current home. We downsized from two homes to one years ago when I had an infant, and I could not deal with sorting through everything at that time, so my current house is not only cluttered with the extras from that consolidation, but also all the new stuff that comes with having kids. I found this book very useful.

There are exercises in the beginning designed to help you sort out your emotions around downsizing, and some specific techniques presented to help overcome some typical excuses for not d0ing it. Also cautionary tales about how people can make mistakes and keep the wrong items and discard things they'll later regret having lost if you don't take the time to be thoughtful about the process.

The biggest revelation for me was that objects you own can either reflect the image you want to present to the world (and/or your closest family and friends) or they can reflect something opposite to your intent. This had not occurred to me before-- I had while reading other books gone through the visualization exercises about how you aspire to live your life, but those always ended with thinking of how to make your actions and behavior align with your goals. This one forces you to examine how your possessions align/detract from your goals.

Also, the author suggests limiting downsizing to two hours a day (more if you feel up to it). I think Marie Kondo's method left me cold since she advocated doing everything in one huge undertaking, and that was just too overwhelming for me. Also, I wasn't really buying the "joy" determination for things with purely utilitarian value. This book, with its focus on defining a few "treasures" (they should definitely spark joy) and then moving on to the other utilitarian category of "worthy" items that you can keep not for their big emotional impact, but because you need to use them. Towels. A toaster. But you do have to consider if something once "worthy" is still worthy. I'll need to examine all the things I used to use a lot before I had kids, and see if they currently make sense in my current life. I've already sold my rollerblades and snowboard, but I'm sure I'll find other stuff I just don't have the time or interest to use anymore.

He also has an entire chapter about how to manage the situation when you and your siblings have to go through a parent's estate, and some ways to reduce the stress and conflict involved in that.

I'm happy to recommend this book for anyone who has to go through the process of getting rid of a lot of possessions and is having a hard time with it.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Full disclosure: I have not read this book, but my mother has and it has SAVED what would have been a disastrous move. After almost 30 years in the same house, my parents are moving across country and Peter Walsh is the reason I still have my sanity.
Throughout the book, he offers practical wisdom that tackles a lot of the big pitfalls of downsizing, #1 emotionally charged items. Through several different angles, he really helps move you from being totally attached to being able to let go and keep the things that really matter. It was a huge thing for my mom to throw out a "treasure" that she had kept for 60 years that held a deeply traumatic memory.
The "treasure map" was really helpful in helping my parents sort out what a "treasure" really is and what's just junk with vague memories attached.

Highly recommend if you are considering a move or downsizing or even if you're in the middle of one. Makes such a difference!

[Peyton-Leigh Holmes · Rating 2 out of 5]

Let me state off the bat that I didn’t even finish the book. I was hopeful that it would be full of useful info on how to downsize a parent. I even recommended it to my mom to help her (based on the topic). She didn’t get anything out of it either. It basically deals with the weighty emotions that can come with downsizing.

We were looking for a book that walks you through what to actually do with the stuff when there has been decades of accumulation. Things like weighing the pros and cons of yard sales, estate sales, etc. How to actually find people who would want the items. Things like that, because this is an entirely new chapter of life and it would be nice to have some guidance. We didn’t get it from this book.

[Bethany · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have been wanting to read a Peter Walsh book for awhile because I’ve heard good things from friends and am in major purge mode right now. This was available without a wait at my library, so it was sort of chosen by default from the books he has written. I’m not sure if it was exactly what I am looking for right now, but it was packed with super useful information if you are helping a loved one downsize or downsizing after a loved one passes away, something I hope not to worry about for a long time. It did motivate me to go through all of the mementos from elementary-high school/college and beyond that I’ve been keeping and decide what’s really important. I ended up taking his advice and taking pictures of a lot of it (not letters, but things like plaques I’m never going to hang and trophies that won’t be displayed in my home) and I’m creating a quick chatbook from those. Zak and I eliminated 3 plastic storage containers of stuff and consolidated to just one!!

[Jerry (Rebel With a Massive Media Library) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Let it go, let it go, can't hold it back anymore! Let it go, let it go; turn my back and slam the door!

Oops...wrong "Let It Go"!

(Seriously, did anyone not think of Elsa when they saw this book's title?)

This book had some great advice for hoarders...which, I hate to admit, I am one.

[StarMan]

IN SHORT: Good, especially if you have emotional attachments to stuff. Detailed suggestions on decluttering your own stuff prior to a move, or cleaning out a parent's home, etc.

If emotions and a$$hole siblings are not part of your scenario, then try one of Peter Walsh's other books first.

VERDICT:   2.67 stars for me, but it probably deserves 3 or 4 stars.

If you like Peter Walsh's TV shows and/or have emotional issues with mom's old china cabinet, a broken stapler from 1977, or your collection of movie tickets stubs, then check this book out. Otherwise, there are decluttering books out there that get to the point far more quickly, and are less touchy-feely.

A FEW DETAILS:

Apparently, many folks have tremendous (and often unhealthy) attachments to stuff/junk, and/or have other "reasons" for hanging onto junk (I paid lots of money for it! It brings me good memories when I see it! I might use it one day! and so forth).

This book proposes a relatively painless way to divorce such people from their junk.

This is not a throw-it-all-out and become a Zen minimalist plan; it's more of a thoughtful stuff-reduction plan. It deals with situations such as parents dying (or suddenly being in a nursing home), a family suddenly moving to a much smaller home, and other situations where there's a ton of stuff that suddenly must be downsized/moved/disposed of/etc.

I thought the method sounded excessively elaborate and emotional--but it's surely helpful to many people. I am definitely not saying Peter is wrong; he's spent years helping emotional people/hoarders & their stuff! Fortunately, Peter doesn't go crazy with tons of psychological test questions in this book; I remember seeing 4 or 5 short, easily-graded ones.


I liked a different Peter Walsh book better (maybe because I read it first?):
It's All Too Much: An Easy Plan for Living a Richer Life with Less Stuff (3-4 stars).

[Ren · Rating 5 out of 5]

"All you need to keep around are the items that you treasure and the items that you use."

I like the real life stories peppered throughout the book and found one family's solution to splitting up the parents' possessions especially good. They decided to view the items as having no monetary value and each sibling got to choose items in turn that they would keep and promised not to sell. (Walsh later suggests rolling dice or drawing straws to make this random, not based on age, etc) What wasn't chosen was sold or donated. I'll have to remember this one because I know my sisters and I will be faced with this someday. There are very few items in my mother's house that I truly would love to have and they're not expensive items. The section on handling other's stuff is something I should go back and re-read/listen to again when the time comes. I would send a copy of this book to my mother now if I thought she would actually read it and not just lose it in the house.

Walsh goes into the psychology of why we keep things we don't need and sometimes don't even like as well as the personalities we will likely deal with as we downsize or help to go through another's things. Truly, the most wonderful gift we can leave our heirs is not leaving them a house packed full of our junk to sort through someday. As Walsh says, if an item is worth keeping, it's worth telling its story. Write down why an item means something to you so others will know.

I had to chuckle every time he mentioned the entertainment center. My mother has one that she won't give up even though her current tv doesn't even fit in it so she has a smaller stand in front of it to hold the tv...

I think this book would be a great resource for anyone downsizing or dealing with a loved one's things when faced with a forced downsize or after they have passed. Great suggestions all around.

[Two Readers in Love · Rating 3 out of 5]

"The two carboard boxes that my sister and I held outside the nursing home didn't really hold the sum of our mother's life. A box can't hold *yours* either, even a box the size of your home.

Now that you're in this new phase of your life, keep having experiences that are worth treasuring forever. Whether you're closer to 40 or 80, let your time and energy be worthy possessions that you use every day to improve your family, your neighborhood, or even beyond." p. 235-236.

A solid book on downsizing, with useful chapters particularly geared toward helping loved ones who are moving or have passed on. The author doesn't want to just to shove it all aside either, but rather use this as an opportunity to confront who you are, what you value, and the legacy you wish to leave. I wish I had this book back when my mother and grandmother passed away during my late teens, as I would have realized some of the false expectations I was holding, as well as saving myself any number of burdens!

[Donna · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was a kind of “default choice” because of the fact that the audio version was available when I needed another book. It focuses mostly on downsizing, or cleaning out a loved one’s home. It was interesting with many good tips on dealing with the clutter, deciding what to keep, and how to get rid of the rest. There was also a lengthy section on working peacefully with family members involved in the process with you.

I would recommend this book if I knew someone who was struggling with the personal dynamics of siblings cleaning out the parents’ home. If that is not your situation, and you only wish to declutter, there may be other books better suited to your needs. If you enjoy a nice Scottish accent, then I recommend this book. I’d listen to it again, just for the accent!

[James · Rating 2 out of 5]

This author gets so lost in the details that the point of downsizing gets lost.

[Jennifer Stringer · Rating 4 out of 5]

My downsizing project has more or less sputtered out and if I want to be finished with the whole ordeal by the time all this social distancing comes to a close I'd better kick it up a notch. I read this mainly for motivation because by now I've read so many of these kind of books, there's not a lot of new information. What I took from this book was that when we come across something that triggers SAG emotions (sadness, anxiety, guilt) we have the option to reframe those feelings. This is different from avoiding them.You can acknowledge that looking at them makes you sad (and you don't keep stuff that makes you sad!), but you reframe the item for what it brought you and relive happy memories. So, seeing my husband's bowling ball bag in the closet does make me sad, but rather than avoid the closet, I take out the bag, remember the fun he had with his bowling team, his fruitless efforts at making me a better bowler, the good friends he made along the way - feel the gratitude for those experiences - and then put that puppy in the goodwill pile. Admittedly, it's much harder to do when he left so many things undone/works in progress. But the principle is the same, so I keep plugging away.

[Linda Hartlaub · Rating 5 out of 5]

There comes a time when you know you need to downsize to make life simpler. Then you look at all your "stuff" and realize that the simple idea of moving it all is overwhelming.

Enter Peter Walsh with a plan. Peter Walsh always has a plan. This time he looks directly at all the baby boomers and tells us "It's time". It's time to clean out the closets, the basement, and all those boxes that you haven't looked through in years (maybe decades). It's time to do this so that you can move into that house that doesn't take all your time and resources to do the maintenance and upkeep. It's time to do this to move into a retirement community if that's your preference. It's time to do this so that your kids won't have to do it. And for those kids whose parents didn't clear out the home, he has a plan for you, too, to deal with what was left behind.

It's hard to think that when we leave this earth that all that is left behind is basically the detritus of our lives, but on the other hand, if we clear it out, we leave more time for memories to be made. Isn't that the better of the two options?

[Jen Pratt · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is short, sweet and highly motivating. It’s really about downsizing, which I don’t need to do, but I hoped it would help me declutter. It definitely worked! A year ago I read The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up. I started rolling my socks, but a year later still have not made any major decluttering progress. Today while listening I went through tons of stuff. I was able to visualize what I want my space to be and declutter what doesn’t fit. He has great guidelines to help with dealing with keepsakes and other nostalgia. He also helps you understand the emotions tied to things.

[Bice · Rating 3 out of 5]

I like the Title and “Let it Go “ has become my decluttering mantra. However I can’t recall anything that struck me or stayed with me. Had I read this before reading Making Space Clutter Free: The Last Book on Decluttering You Will Ever Need I know my rating would be higher.

[Bookjazzer2010 · Rating 3 out of 5]

Practical review of considerations in downsizing. Useful for me as I help my father move to assisted living.

[Kari Yergin]

I read this because mom was very excited about reading it, and I wanted to be on the same page! It definitely motivated me, too.


Excerpts. You have to set up your home to nurture and encourage your new life when you’ve gone through a transition.
What sorts of new opportunities do I want to enjoy in the next phase of my life? What challenges might keep me from making the most of this opportunity? How can I modify my home, my possessions, my relationships and my point of view to make the new life I want possible?

Let go of the following things to be more authentic and open and true to yourself: Things you never really liked, things, you regret paying so much for, Stuff you inherited and hold onto out of a sense of obligation, and outdated belongings that represent a version of yourself long gone.

How much do you have because of laziness? Things that you’ve replaced? Obligation? things you bought on impulse? Imposition — like things that your kids have stored in your basement or preschool items that don’t fit in the storage unit or school?
instead, you should just keep things that you treasure or actually use

Exercise: the objects that identify me
When strangers encounter me, I hope they think of me as…
What top three possessions that I own help me create that impression? What possessions that I own will create the opposite impression?
What are the most important roles in life that identify who I am? which three possessions help me create that impression? what possessions are linked rolls that are no longer important to me? after I’m gone, I want my children and grandchildren to remember me for these characteristics, things I did, or experiences I had. Which three possessions will help me leave these memories? What possessions that I only create an impression that I don’t want to leave?

If a possession is important enough to keep, write down its story
Write on the back of pictures
If you’re ready to let a treasure go, take a picture of it
When you have a lot of one item give careful thought as to which few you want to keep. All the others dilute the impact of the best ones.

MEMORIES:
**(treasures representing peak moments and ppl. Irreplaceable. 5% of your stuff tops. Keep them) But save photos and personal stuff till very end of getting rid of stuff— they are a time suck!
**(Trinkets. Spark a smile but not as important)
**(Forgotten. Can’t remember where came from. No significance other than being in your home forever)
**(Malignant. Remind of pain)

I MIGHT NEED IT
(Worthy items can keep)

TRASH/RECYCLE

Making my treasure map:
My happiest memory of each child
My happiest memory of each grandchild
My favorite family vacation
My greatest career achievement
the gift that gave me the most pleasure
The moment when I felt closest to my spouse
My most enjoyable family event
The most important memory I have about each departed relative
My greatest academic achievement
The best time I had with friends
My most important athletic achievement
My biggest personal triumph
My weekend in Vegas trip
My most meaningful childhood memory
The greatest dinner party ever
The best birthday celebration
The happiest day of my life
The most challenging adversity I overcame
The time I laughed the hardest
My wedding day
My favorite high school memory
My favorite college memory
My most important family heirloom
The book that had the biggest impact on my life
My favorite pet
My most meaningful experience in nature
What are the best greatest and most in your life will continue to inspire And comfort you after you downsize
As long as they fit on your table, your job is to come up with whatever treasures best represent the life you’ve lived.

SAG. Most downsizing fears go back to sadness, anxiety, or guilt.

Exercise: think about if you’re feeling any of the emotions, sadness, anxiety, or guilt about getting rid of any of your stuff. What steps can you take to let the items go along with the emotions attached to them?

[L (Nineteen Adze) · Rating 2 out of 5]

This doesn't really merit a full review, but a friend asked why this is two stars and not one. So, with the knowledge that this is really 1.5 stars rounded up:
- There are a few useful pieces of mental framing here. I particularly like the advice about going through cherished collections of similar items and picking the best one, the one that can represent the whole set, as the worthy piece to keep-- I'd like to apply that next time I'm going through old college items.
- It's also useful to picture things like saving only enough treasures to fill a dining room table (an easy quantity to see and touch) rather than thinking in terms of boxes or how much you can wedge into a closet somewhere.
- I can always use the reminder to get rid of what the author calls "malignant items." Having an item that's a memento of a distinctive life phase isn't useful if it just calls up bad or complicated emotions. Marie Kondo is much better on this point, though, and I'm probably overdue for a reread there.

Overall, though, the use case for this book is "you are downsizing your own home or your parents' home later in life, probably on short notice, and would inexplicably prefer more than fifty pages of fluff about how good the method is (and personality profiles of annoying things your siblings might do) before the book speed-runs through the actual tips." As someone who's done one cross-country move and probably has more on the horizon one day, I was hoping for more general advice about managing your stuff (or downsizing while the amount is still small in your thirties). To me, the vague mention of use cases like merging households for marriage without ever exploring them contributes to the book's misleading packaging as a general-use resource.

//
First impressions: my primary issue is that I'm not the target audience (despite it being pitched as a more general resource), but it's also just obnoxiously structured. The first fifty or so pages are just about hyping up the virtues of the method, like a commercial for a book I was already reading-- then there are a few good suggestions mixed into the fluff of the middle and finally some rushed-but-decent chapters at the end. This needed a complete reworking and different jacket copy to indicate that it's only really useful if you're either of retirement age and downsizing your own home to a smaller one, or helping your aging parents to downsize their possessions. If you're younger, other scenarios like preparing for a cross-country move or merging households in marriage are mentioned briefly in chapter introductions or not explored at all. Even the layout is terrible, with those text boxes for anecdotes falling in awful configurations like the middle of a bulleted list for one box, a double-page spread of another anecdote box on the next two pages, and the bulleted list picking up three pages later. This writer may be a good real-life downsizing adviser, but it doesn't translate well to the page.

I'm downsizing this book right over to the Little Free Library shortly. RTC.

[Diane · Rating 4 out of 5]

I got a lot out of this book. This is more about downsizing than minimizing and asks what do you want to keep of your own things or your parents things. Also talks about how to deal with all the emotions that will come up when the time comes. How to say no to things you don’t want and also how to think about what kind of mess you might leave for your own children one day. I think this book is full of good advice and includes who in the family deserves to have the final say about parental items. Part three was extremely repetitive though and an unnecessary addition.

I do feel confident after reading this to throw out some ‘treasures’ I have that have very negative memories attached to them. There isn’t anything I read to date that cinched the reasons for doing so. I also have inherited things that I do not want and do not like that I do not want to keep either - so those will be going out the door with confidence soon enough. 😁

“you don’t need all this stuff. It’s concealing who you really are. All you need to keep around are the items you treasure and the items that you use. That’s it! These things don’t prevent the world from seeing you how you really are”

“if you hold onto all your stuff, you may be less likely and able to make new memories”

[Betsy · Rating 2 out of 5]

As I'm trying to declutter and Marie Kondo my way through our house, I wanted a little extra motivation and checked out this book. Unfortunately, my motivation wasn't turned towards getting our house decluttered as much as it was turned towards just getting through this book. There wasn't really any new information on decluttering that I haven't already seen or read through Marie Kondo, the Home Edit, or various different podcasts. If you are just beginning your downsizing journey, this may be a good book to start with.

[Erica T · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is all about downsizing your things and getting rid of stuff that is not important. While I think it was written more for people who are actually moving it’s got some thoughts I really love-

“You never have too little space. If you ever feel this way, the problem is actually that you have too much stuff.”
“When everything is important nothing is important.”
“Will I be less important if I own less stuff?”

I especially liked when he talked about not feeling guilt or other emotions if you want to get rid of things. Also he tells you that you do not have to make your home into a shrine for someone who passes away. Keep a few important treasures and get rid of the rest.

[Suzanne Tanner · Rating 2 out of 5]

I've been wanting to check out some other declutter literature since hopping on the Marie Kondo bandwagon, but this wasn't particularly the book for me. This one is mostly targeting people in a transition period where they need to downsize (moving to a smaller house, cleaning out a deceased parent's house, etc.), and that's not our situation at all (five people in a two bedroom apartment, we can really only go up from here). But I did appreciate a lot of what he had to say about our emotional connection to stuff, so I think maybe I should check out some of Walsh's other books.

[Amy · Rating 2 out of 5]

Just listening to this is making me anxious. There is a serious difference between rationally knowing something and emotionally feeling something. Difficult to take action even when you know you should.

I understand that the latter part of the book was supposed to be tailored for what type of downsizing you were working on, but there was so much repetition that it wasn't worth reading it all. Exact word for word repetition of an entire section. So much so I was wondering if there was a problem with the audiobook I was listening to.

[Birdie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Inspiring philosophy and practical tips on freeing ourselves from emotional ties to stuff. It includes helpful information on dealing with our parents' accummulation of things. Unfortunately for me, the library CD I was listening to had a blank Disc 4, which contained the most important advice from the book on dealing with my own accummulation. I've ordered another copy.

[Eileen Linden · Rating 2 out of 5]

I’m not overly impressed. I’m not a pack rat and therefore got nothing from this book. Oh, I don’t need to keep junk I don’t want? Really? Very insightful. 40% through the book and all he talks about is the The Let it Go Method.... yet nothing about how to start. I need to stop reading these books and write one.

[Terry · Rating 2 out of 5]

After reading Finn Murphy's book, I was looking for some practical advice on how to get rid of stuff, and this popped up.

But it's not what I was looking for; seemed like counseling for hoarders more than advice for common folks.

[Ann · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nothing new here. Keep your treasures so they fit on your dining room table otherwise everything loses values if you have too much. So don't need to keep all the kids artwork, just some memorable ones.

[Andrea · Rating 3 out of 5]

There were some really good ideas and things to think about in this book. When cleaning out the clutter, you're not just removing the items...you also have to acknowledge the memories (good and bad) that are associated with them.