Wild Rituals: 10 Lessons Animals Can Teach Us About Connection, Community, and Ourselves

by Caitlin O'Connell

Wild Rituals explores how embracing the rituals of the animal kingdom can make us more connected to ourselves, nature, and others.

Behavioral ecologist and world-renowned elephant scientist Caitlin O'Connell dives into the rituals of elephants, apes, zebras, rhinos, lions, whales, flamingos, and many more.

This fascinating read helps us better understand how we are similar to wild animals, and encourages us to find healing, self-awareness, community, and self-reinvention.

• Filled with fascinating stories on 10 different animal rituals
• Features original full-color photos, from the Caribbean to the African savannah
• Demonstrates the profound way we are similar to the wild creatures who captivate us

Wild Rituals journeys into the desert, tundra, and rainforest to reveal the importance of rituals and how they can help us find a simpler, more meaningful way of living.

In a culture of technology where we find ourselves living at a greater distance from nature and each other, this remarkable book taps into the unspoken languages of creatures around the world.

• Caitlin O'Connell is on the faculty at Harvard Medical School and an award-winning author who spent more than 30 years studying animals in the wild.
• Makes a great gift for anyone curious about nature, animals, and how humans compare to and interact with both
• Add it to the shelf with books like Beyond Words: What Animals Think and Feel by Carl Safina; Are We Smart Enough to Know How Smart Animals Are? by Frans de Waal; The Inner Life of Animals: Love, Grief, and Compassion—Surprising Observations of a Hidden World by Peter Wohlleben; and The Soul of an Octopus: A Surprising Exploration into the Wonder of Consciousness by Sy Montgomery.

Genres: Nonfiction, Science, Animals, Nature, Cultural, Psychology

264 pages, Hardcover

Published January 12, 2021

About the author

Dr. Caitlin O'Connell is an Instructor at Harvard Medical School and a world renowned expert on elephants and vibrotactile sensitivity. She is the author of the internationally acclaimed nonfiction science memoir, The Elephant's Secret Sense (2007, Simon & Schuster--Free Press), which highlights a novel form of elephant communication as well as their conservation plight. Her narrative nonfiction photo book An Elephant's Life (2011, Lyons Press) uses a graphic novel approach to revealing subtle and intimate aspects of elephant society. Her co-authored nonfiction children's book, The Elephant Scientist (2011, Houghton Mifflin Children's Books) won five awards, including the Robert F. Sibert Honor and Horn Book Honor for 2012. A Baby Elephant In The Wild (2014, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Books for Young Readers) was a Junior Library Guild Select and winner of the 2015 NSTA award for Outstanding Science Trade Book for students K-12. Her second science memoir, Elephant Don: The Politics Of A Pachyderm Posse (University of Chicago Press) came out in 2015. Her debut novel, Ivory Ghosts, also came out in 2015 with Alibi, an ebook imprint of Random House. The sequel to Ivory Ghosts, White Gold, came out in February, 2017 and the first issue of the comic came out in May, 2018. Bridge to the Wild was published in August, 2016 with Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Books for Young Readers. In her latest nonfiction book, Wild Rituals, 2020, O'Connell highlights the importance of ritual to all social animals including ourselves. O'Connell is the co-founder and CEO of the nonprofit organization, Utopia Scientific (www.utopiascientific.org), dedicated to research and science education. She is also co-director of Triple Helix Productions, with a mandate to develop more accurate and entertaining science content for the media. She has taught Science Writing for Stanford University and The New York Times Knowledge Network.

Reviews

[Nursebookie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dr. Caitlin O'Connell from Harvard Medical School is a world renowned expert on animal communication, and has written what I feel is a very timely book about what we need right now during this pandemic and those are the 10 lessons that animals can teach us about ourselves, our community and our connection with nature.

This book was completely fascinating and really eye opening for me - it taught me a lot about understanding our similarities with the animal kingdom and use that learned knowledge that science and neuropsychology brings to improve ourselves, encourage healing, find self-awareness and connect better with each other - whether be our colleagues, friends, our family.

This is seriously a very captivating read from how we mindfully greet one another - offering a smile, making eye contact, these are what fosters and generate positive relationships among each other. By reading this book and learning about 10 focused life lessons, we can make for a better and healthier relationship. This is a beautifully written book that all of us must read.

I highly recommend this book - this will also make for a great gift for those in leadership positions, professionals, and those who work in public sectors. This was simply amazing.

[Bookedupgirl · Rating 5 out of 5]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
ONE word... FASCINATING. I was surprised by how much I enjoyed this book. I devoured it in one day and was just obsessed with every page.

WILD RITUALS explores how embracing the rituals of the animal kingdom can make us more connected to ourselves, nature and others. Behavioural ecologist and world renowned elephant scientists Caitlin O’Connell dives into the rituals of elephants, apes, zebras and many more and helps us understand how similar we are to wild animals.

I loved how as Caitlin took us through each of the rituals there were examples relating to both the animals and human behaviours/relationships- I just found everything so interesting and captivating, and written with such passion and understanding. I even found the grief chapter pretty emotional. I can’t recommend this unique read enough 🙌🏻

[Alessandra | Journalinthedirt · Rating 4 out of 5]

WILD RITUALS by Caitlin O’Connell

First of all, I want to crush on this lady for a moment!! Dr. Caitlin O’Connell is a world renowned elephant scientist, she’s on the faculty at Harvard Medical School, she’s had an award winning Smithsonian documentary featuring her work… yeah… Just wow! Growing up I was obsessed with Jane Goodall and her studies. Did you know I was a vet tech before going into nursing school? This book reminded me of my deep deep love of animals and our necessary connection to them. 10 lessons animals can teach us about connection, community, and ourselves is what the world needs right now. Take a look at your behavior through the lens of an animal scientist. You’ll see that we’re not that different in rituals.

Animals are funny. They display outlandish behaviors to get a mates attention, nest, burrow, and even sh** themselves to show affection. By seeing some of the behaviors that birds display for a mate, it may closely remind you of bathroom selfies, gym selfies, and bringing flowers to a significant other. Many animals mate for life, while others have one night stands and continue playing the field their whole lives. There’s no judgement in the animal kingdom. The common thread among species including our own, is the power of the collective. Singled out we may be prey, but together we can make big changes in our own ecosystems and harbor a healthy community.

This book was so healing. It just put a direct injection of love straight to my heart. I highly recommend this for any animal lover, Nat Geo watcher, or science nerd. It’s extremely fascinating and heartfelt. O’Connell writes with passion, and a true love and understanding of not only the animal world, but the human world.

@tlcbooktours @chronicleprism @elephant_skinny #caitlinoconnell #WildRituals #animalbehavior #nonfiction #themoreyouknow

[Ivory · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved!!! Anyone who loves nature will love this book. Easy quick read. Loved learning how much animals and humans are alike in our rituals and behaviors. From grieving, gifting, mating, and migrating. Really helps us see our planet as one and makes us realize we are not superior beings as humans. Wow what intelligence animals have!!!Really enjoyed this read and the authors insight.

[John Geary · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a tough one to review. I buzzed through it and quite enjoyed it, but I’m not sure it gave me exactly what I was looking for, maybe my expectations were too high?
The author – a behavioural ecologist who has studied elephants and other wildlife populations - writes very well, her descriptions of nature paint exquisite pictures of the wild.
Although she is a PhD, she wrote this book in a way that anyone with reasonable reading abilities can understand and enjoy.
The author is very open and authentic about her life experiences and how they have affected her, and that certainly was a plus.
I was already aware of most of the rituals described in the book, some from actual observation, many from other books I’ve read, so maybe because of that it left me wanting more.
I guess I was looking for something I did not already know rather than concepts of which I was simply reminded.
There’s also a good chance that my reaction is a reflection of my current state of mind; given my cynicism and disappointment in the way a large section of the population has behaved since the pandemic kicked in, I was looking for some magic potion, some radical new processes that would maybe help change some of this. Of course, this book might help a lot of those people – if you could get them to read it.
I gave this book 4 stars but I don’t really think it was a four-star book; again, with Goodreads rating system you have to pick a whole number. This book was much better than a three-star rating but I don’t know that rated 4 - maybe a 3.5 or probably 3.75.

[Carmen M · Rating 4 out of 5]

"As human beings, we often try to distinguish ourselves from other animals as being more advanced-or superior. Recognizing our similarities to other animals can instead be cause for celebration, not created like a threat to a misguided sense of uniqueness, separateness, or even dominion over the rest of nature."

In Wild Rituals, elephant scientist Caitlin O'Connell examines 10 rituals non-human animals exhibit in the wild and how they relate to our own rituals, traditions, and experiences. Caitlin O'Connell uses her many years studying and observing elephants and other animals to provide a touching examination that details our connection with animals and how we can learn to become more aware and compassionate. From playful encounters to funerary practices, it becomes evident that we are not so different from other animals, especially in how we engage socially.

"Whether simple or elaborate, rituals can be transformative, both mentally and physically, and they connect us, strengthen bonds, create order, and ground us within a community."

One of my recent goals has been to incorporate more non-fiction into my "reading schedule," and Wild Rituals has proved to be a great start. What I love most is O'Connell's ability to balance explanations of non-human animal rituals with that of our own. Sometimes accounts are comical, such as the courtship rituals of birds, while others are more solemn, such as an elephant's ability to mourn the loss of a family member. In all instances, what remains clear is that in learning about the rituals of non-human animals, we also learn a lot about ourselves, our relationships, and our connection with nature. Although technology and our busy lives might consume us, O'Connell gently reminds us to be mindful, healthy, and acknowledge the beauty in sharing the planet with such magnificent creatures. In doing so, we learn to respect our environment and all its inhabitants while recognizing the power of rituals we often take advantage of, such as smiling at a stranger or making eye contact.

If you love learning about animals or reading about the impact of nature and the environment, I highly recommend picking up this book. There are also beautiful photographs that include an array of animals, including giraffes, zebras, lions, elephants, wolves, rhinos, gorillas, and chimpanzees - all of which add stunning visualizations to the explanations within the book. O’Connell’s experiences, not only from studying animals but events from her personal life, adds an intimate quality while still remaining relatable.

*I received a free copy of the book in exchange for an honest review.*

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[Ellen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This captivating gem on animal behavior is one you don’t want to miss. O’Connell has studied elephants for over 30 years and is an expert on their ways, but she is also a gifted relayer of anecdotes about every wild species you can imagine, from rhinos to bonobos to flamingos to our domesticated favorites, dogs.

Ritual is defined as a specific act performed in a precise manner and repeated often. O’Connell details ten: greeting, group behavior, courtship, gifting, spoken and unspoken behaviors, play, grief, renewal and travel. There’s fascinating descriptions of all, but a few of my favorites include:
•the joy of the elephant greeting ritual (ear flapping, excited bellowing, placing trunks in each others’ mouths, standing frozen side by side, and then evacuating their bowels!)
•the gifting rituals of prey—or a windsock and expensive research microphone she stole from researchers—a lioness uses to teach her cubs to hunt
•baboon courtship rituals. Much like humans, when females are rejected by dominant males (who tend to be the brawniest), weaker subordinate males step in with characteristics like generosity and kindness and are accepted for mating. Sounds like humans!

[Gerri · Rating 4 out of 5]

Enjoyable read. Underlying theme is that we're not so different after all from other animals - so many rituals found in nature have strong parallels in our own lives. This book helps build a stronger kinship with the animal kingdom.

[Bekah Simon · Rating 5 out of 5]

Highly recommend this book! I learned so much from this!

[Linda Kueneman · Rating 5 out of 5]

After losing my Dad, in July 2021, I found it difficult to focus. As a return to normalcy I gifted myself this treasure, Wild Rituals. We, all of us, human & nonhuman animals are deserving of our place on this Earth. We are more connected by our common ground & Wild Rituals as evolutionary processes & research have proven. Caitlin O'Connell brings to light that human & nonhuman animals share deep commonalities as emotional, sentient, intelligent, communal, & pragmatic beings. Human & nonhuman animals cannot exist without one another.

It is time the human animals on Planet Earth, become less myopic & selfish. I highly recommend Wild Rituals & encourage a pause in hopes of contemplation & new direction.

[Jo · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.8/5

[Casey · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you’re interested in animals, psychology, or understanding human connection, then this book is for you!

Wild Rituals explores the human and animal behaviors that show our deep need for connection. Everything from greetings to body language to play are essential to wellbeing and a sense of community. Caitlin O’Connell uses her 30+ years of experience to provide immersive accounts that make you feel like you’re watching the animals yourself.

I love how she related many examples to the pandemic. At a time when we are physically isolated, we crave connection more than ever.

This is a fascinating read and there is a 100% chance I will share fun facts from it.

[Carlos · Rating 2 out of 5]

O'Connell seeks to share with the reader what we can learn about ourselves from the rituals animals undertake in a number of different situations. The narrative is centered on the author’s experience studying elephants but a number of other species are also explored. While the rituals are well described and a fascinating read, the amount of prescriptive advice for the reader at the end of each chapter felt a bit much. The book is certainly worth the quick read but it would have definitely been improved by greater attention paid to the animals and less advice for the humans reading it.

[Rudi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Een mooi boek met mooie , interessante dierenweetjes ( inclusief sapiens) ,
Een aanrader voor mensen met interesse in de natuur biologie, dankjewel voor de schrijfster om me mee te nemen tussen de dieren rituelen

[Beth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fascinating.

[Lily · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thought this was a very well written book about animal rituals and how we humans aren't all that different. I found it very enlightening and highly recommend it.

[Storm Stanley · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed reading Caitlin O'Connell's recently published book Wild Rituals, particularly her personal reflections, sharing numerous experiences from a lifetime of wildlife research, including elephants to humpback whales, birdlife and apes. Her easy fluid reading style will make it accessible to all ages from teens to seniors.

O'Connell explains in the Intro that "animals have incredibly sophisticated rituals that are related to all aspects of their lives. These rituals allow them to survive in a very complex world, to predict what will happen next, and to connect deeply with their families and communities. These rituals are very similar to our own", from pilgrimages to "reset one's perspective" to mourning and burying our dead. On the way, you can be sure that you will learn a few things from our four-legged, feathered or finned distant relatives with whom we share this planet and have evolved in concert with. O'Connell points out that we are more closely related than you might realise, we are even connected to a banana, sharing 50% of our genetic make-up.

Definitely reading this book allowed me to be better informed. The two most interesting chapters in O'Connell's book to me—working with pachyderms—are chapter 6 'Unspoken Rituals' and chapter 8 'Grieving Rituals'. In the former the author discusses intimidation as a male dominance strategy whether the boardroom or at the waterhole. In chapter 8, as most of us are aware, elephants feel strong emotions around death. However, it is astonishing how many other animals experience sadness around the loss of a relative. O'Connell references BJ King's work on animal grieving, suggesting that it may have developed "to facilitate rest and recovery". However, there is something for everyone in Wild Rituals; and no matter how long you may have been working with animals.

I learned more about the dawn and dusk chorus and why animals communicate "during this brief window when the sun rises and sets and sound transmission is at its peak...at nightfall, temperatures get cooler close to the ground, even as a warmer temperature layer sits above the cold layer. When dense clouds form above this warmer layer sounds bounce off of and get sandwiched into the warmer layer above the colder ground, and these sounds travel faster and farther then usual."

The photography is stunning. But most importantly, O'Connell reminds us why the natural world is so essential to us "...nature is the gateway to re-engaging in our wild rituals for a richer; more rewarding life", admonishing us to persevere to protect other species and their vanishing wildernesses.

[Jeannette · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book covers ten "rituals." Not sure if that is a suitable title to cover the 10 lessons presented, which are: Greeting, Grouping, Courtship, Giving, Spoken, Unspoken, Play, Grieving, Renewal, Travel and Reconnection. I liked these groupings and the wide ranging examples given to illustrate them. It was a good review for me. The author writes well and knows her subjects.
I read this book simultaneously with "Raised by Animals" by Jennifer L. Verdolin. There is lots of overlap in subject matter but a very different way of presenting the same information. Inevitably I compare the two. Both are way too wide ranging, using examples of animal behavior all across the spectrum, anecdotes, data, old concepts, new ideas. Each book tries hard to teach humans lessons gleaned from the authors' understanding of how other animals live their lives. The best bit of both is bringing fascinating animal behavior to the attention of more people, hopefully making all of us more aware, respectful, and careful.

[Samantha · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I first saw this book and read the synopsis, I thought "Oh, what an interesting topic!"
O'Connell's writing style is very clear and makes it feel as if she is sharing this information with you personally. Her passion for the subject is also easily conveyed. I found much of the information to be quite fascinating, learning all the ways that we are so connected to our fellow animals through our like behaviors.

[Suhailk · Rating 1 out of 5]

The book was prolonged for no reason. The message that was going to be delivered in each chapter wasn’t clear at all. There was no clear coherence between the animalistic rituals and human rituals overall. The only reason I gave it 1 star was because of the very few historical facts I obtained within the texts.

[AnneOo · Rating 2 out of 5]

De verwachtingen die ik van dit boek had bleven compleet uit: de rituelen die in het dierenrijk voorkomen werden niet uiteengezet en ik vond het lastig een rode draad in het verhaal te ontdekken. Ik werd nergens echt geboeid. Toen ik het uit had had ik het idee dat ik een paar hoofdstukken gemist had moeten hebben, het voelde incompleet aan.

[Dodie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book. This book teaches us about animals and their rituals. There were several themes of ritual, birth, death, verbal and no verbal… etc. It was very interesting then how there was a human connection. I really enjoyed this book.

[Em theglitterybookworm_ · Rating 3 out of 5]

could have been better but idk

[Erin · Rating 2 out of 5]

More animal less humans.

[Kathleen Ricker · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting read. Mixes wildlife behaviors with human behavior.

[Bailey Fredericks · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really liked this book! I liked that it talked about animals, religion, health, music and so many more aspects of culture & life!

[MG · Rating 3 out of 5]

🎧

[April · Rating 3 out of 5]

Animal stories were fun and insightful. Too nych time was spent Virtue signaling.