I chose this book because of the name 母性 (motherhood) and because I know Kanae Minato through movies based on her work.
The story starts with a newspaper article about a girl who has been in a coma since falling out of a window. They do not know if it was a mere accident or a suicide attempt. The mother's statement reads "I cannot believe that something like this would happen to my daughter, who I brought up with all the love I can give".
Each of the chapters is divided into three sections: 母性について (About motherhood), where a school teacher who is interested in the case talks to an older colleague who used to teach the girl in question; 母の手記 (The mother's memorandum), where the mother of the girl writes to a Father; 娘の回想 (The daughter's reminiscence) where the comatose girl tells her story.
It all begins with Mother (I don't think she is named in the book) talking about her love for her own mother (Grandma for the means of this review). She loves Grandma so much, she does everything she does for her, thriving on her praise. Same when she gets into a relationship with Tadokoro, who she meets at a painter's club. While Mother herself thinks he is a bit dull and his paintings are too dark, Grandma praises the paintings. This is the only reason Mother gets married - to make her mother happy.
They move into a small house provided for by Tadokoro's family and after a few years have a girl, Daughter (her name is only mentioned in the last few pages of the book). Everything is going well, until one day, while Grandma stays with them, the house collapses due to a typhoon and Grandma and Daughter are trapped under heavy furniture. Mother doesn't even think of her little daughter, who is six at the time, but tries to rescue Grandma instead. Daughter has to be rescued by her father, who had been at work for his night shift. Grandma's dying wish is for Mother to "love the child as much as you can".
The small family moves to their in-law's house, where Mother is made to work the rice fields, clean the house and cook, without receiving any praise or money. The family's own daughters don't have to lift a finger and Tadokoro, Mother's husband, doesn't ever defend her. Mother believes that if her in-laws just see what a great person she is, they will understand. Of course, this never happens. In the meantime she steadily ignores Daughter, who she blames for Grandma's death, for four years and doesn't even touch her. When after those four years Mother tries to caress Daughter's face while Daughter is asleep, her hand is pushed away - which she blames on Daughter. Anything is blamed on the daughter really. "Why doesn't this child understand?" "Why does a child like this have a mother, when I do not have one anymore?" "If this was me, I would react like XXX, why doesn't this child?" "I love her so much, why doesn't she turn out the way I want her to?".
I'll keep the recounting of the story at this, because it's enough to make my point. I loathe this woman (Mother). Sacrificing herself for no proper reason, working for her in-laws, being pushed around by her sisters-in-law, making her daughter work for her in-laws, staying in a relationship with a husband who defends her only ONCE in their entire marriage and doesn't help around the house either. All for some missunderstood sense of responsibility to a woman who is dead. "I keep on going, because I know that my mother would be proud of me." I felt like taking this woman by the shoulders and shaking her. Probably while screaming GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE, DON'T YOU SEE WHAT YOU ARE DOING TO YOUR DAUGHTER? I mean, she doesn't know what she is doing to her daughter, because everything Daughter does to help or to protect her mother is entirely missunderstood. You cannot just ignore a child for years and years, throwing horrible things at their head, and then expect that child to be happy-go-lucky "I love you mummy". Not to be missunderstood, Daughter loves Mother. But years of being shunned by her mother, pushed away by her father and loathed by her grandmother have taken their toll. At one point she says "My mother hates me so much, she wants to kill me."
Of course, both Mother and Daughter are unrealiable narrators. Mother obviously has a problem, thinking of herself as saint-like (though not as much as Grandma, who is the judge over all of Mother's life. "What would mother think of me?" Grandma herself appears as a very lovely person though, so the blame isn't on her), and taking on all punishments in hope of things getting better. Coupled with a healthy dose of "Why does this child have a mother, when I do not have a mother anymore?".
Daughter is just distraught, trying to do the right thing while being pushed around by all of her family, longing for love from her mother, while expressing her own in ways that her mother doesn't understand.
At one point in the book, one stretches out her arms to hug the other - who interprets it as an attempted strangling.
Minato Kanae has managed to write an extremely compelling story, making me want to read on while being so invested that I wanted to scream at the characters (see above). We just do not know what to believe, when even the conclusion of the whole mess just doesn't ring quite true.