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Nick Archer #1
Demons Are D*cks
My name’s Archer. And I’m a Slayer.
I spend my nights keeping the Creatures of Night, or Cons, in check. Sometimes that means getting my hands dirty. I stake vamps, put mutts to sleep, and slay the hell out of demons. Life’s not easy when supernatural beings are always out for your blood.
˃˃˃ And that’s what a good week looks like.
Right now? I’m having a bad week. Another Slayer just turned up dog food, I’ve got a fresh recruit to train, my boss for my daytime cover job is a knob, and this a***ole demon, Asag, might be building an unstoppable army in hell to bring about the apocalypse.
˃˃˃ So there’s that.
Good thing I kick all ass.
Demons Are D*cks is the first in a new splatstick series featuring Nick Archer. Fans of comedy, horror, action, gore, and the Evil Dead series will love this book.
I spend my nights keeping the Creatures of Night, or Cons, in check. Sometimes that means getting my hands dirty. I stake vamps, put mutts to sleep, and slay the hell out of demons. Life’s not easy when supernatural beings are always out for your blood.
˃˃˃ And that’s what a good week looks like.
Right now? I’m having a bad week. Another Slayer just turned up dog food, I’ve got a fresh recruit to train, my boss for my daytime cover job is a knob, and this a***ole demon, Asag, might be building an unstoppable army in hell to bring about the apocalypse.
˃˃˃ So there’s that.
Good thing I kick all ass.
Demons Are D*cks is the first in a new splatstick series featuring Nick Archer. Fans of comedy, horror, action, gore, and the Evil Dead series will love this book.
- GenresUrban Fantasy
230 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 20, 2019
About the author
Evan Ronan
46 books26 followersI write thrillers. I've studied the masters and hopefully I've learned a few things from them.
Ideas are never in short-supply. Time and talent (or lack thereof) are my only constraints.
My stories don't always fit neatly into categories, but that's what readers seem to like about them.
Ideas are never in short-supply. Time and talent (or lack thereof) are my only constraints.
My stories don't always fit neatly into categories, but that's what readers seem to like about them.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 33 reviews
May 25, 2023
Fun book
Demons are D*cos
By Evan Rowan
This is a fun story about a Slayer and his apprentice as they battle demons, werewolves, and vampires. Great characters and plot! Definitely want to read more of this series.
Demons are D*cos
By Evan Rowan
This is a fun story about a Slayer and his apprentice as they battle demons, werewolves, and vampires. Great characters and plot! Definitely want to read more of this series.
July 8, 2026
What’s with the miller obsession?
Makes me feel like it’s written by a teenager who’s stolen their first drink and decided that becoming obsessed with such was cool. That among the constant references to self being a badass or thinking about how funny they are rather than just dropping the joke and allowing it to be funny hints at a level of naivety that can be difficult to relate to.
Naming one individual *Redacted* because they don’t matter while giving name to other characters who never pop up again put a damper in the flow of the story and is difficult to understand the reasoning behind.
All of the “this day and age, you know” bs makes the reader feel the bitterness, it’s very disheartening. The character needs some sort of back story to help explain such though, I don’t feel this would have come from his unknown past as it’s expressed his feeling didn’t transfer over, only his knowledge gained from books.
This aside I did enjoy the storyline and believe in the way such was written if you were to pair up with someone to create a graphic novel it would work beautifully as it doesn’t require such a smooth flow to be enjoyable and the return of the same joke over and over again can be played into the drawing with taking away from the story.
Makes me feel like it’s written by a teenager who’s stolen their first drink and decided that becoming obsessed with such was cool. That among the constant references to self being a badass or thinking about how funny they are rather than just dropping the joke and allowing it to be funny hints at a level of naivety that can be difficult to relate to.
Naming one individual *Redacted* because they don’t matter while giving name to other characters who never pop up again put a damper in the flow of the story and is difficult to understand the reasoning behind.
All of the “this day and age, you know” bs makes the reader feel the bitterness, it’s very disheartening. The character needs some sort of back story to help explain such though, I don’t feel this would have come from his unknown past as it’s expressed his feeling didn’t transfer over, only his knowledge gained from books.
This aside I did enjoy the storyline and believe in the way such was written if you were to pair up with someone to create a graphic novel it would work beautifully as it doesn’t require such a smooth flow to be enjoyable and the return of the same joke over and over again can be played into the drawing with taking away from the story.
May 31, 2026
Fresh writing style, great story
The pop culture references and locker humor remind me of Buffy, but it’s harder to get into without the visuals of television. Once I forced myself into a 40yo academic gym bro’s mindset, I actually adored this book. I’m gonna finish the series. It’s not my usual point of view. I love how Archer can flow so smoothly back and forth either/or/both deeply intelligent mentor to meat head. He reminds me of my husband I met when we were in the Army together. I call my husband “Encyclopedia Brain,” and we bonded over conspiracy theories and gun range time. He’s maxed intelligence, and I’m maxed wisdom so we compliment each other… If it weren’t for my man, I wouldn’t appreciate Archer quite as much. I relate more to his aloof psychic at this point. I can see this having a niche fan group as a printed book, but I’m easing my way into it. Maybe try the audiobook? I’m excited to see Archer’s moral compass expand, and I HAVE to know his lost memories. Off to read book 2!
The pop culture references and locker humor remind me of Buffy, but it’s harder to get into without the visuals of television. Once I forced myself into a 40yo academic gym bro’s mindset, I actually adored this book. I’m gonna finish the series. It’s not my usual point of view. I love how Archer can flow so smoothly back and forth either/or/both deeply intelligent mentor to meat head. He reminds me of my husband I met when we were in the Army together. I call my husband “Encyclopedia Brain,” and we bonded over conspiracy theories and gun range time. He’s maxed intelligence, and I’m maxed wisdom so we compliment each other… If it weren’t for my man, I wouldn’t appreciate Archer quite as much. I relate more to his aloof psychic at this point. I can see this having a niche fan group as a printed book, but I’m easing my way into it. Maybe try the audiobook? I’m excited to see Archer’s moral compass expand, and I HAVE to know his lost memories. Off to read book 2!
July 1, 2023
This is a very good monster hunter book. My main complaints about it are the total a$$#olery of Archer when interrogating the nonhuman characters and the constant mentioning of needing lots of Miller High Life beer and his total disdain for IPAs. I also wish the kid had some involvement in the actual story instead of remaining a completely separate side story that never really goes anywhere. I forgive the chapter where Lucian suddenly becomes Julian, it's a simple continuity error.
This book isn't quite as funny or or as "slap stick" as the blurb tries to make it seem. But it does those jobs better than most monster hunter books I have read. Give this book a try. For me, when I catch up some of my tbr list I will be back for more of this series.
This book isn't quite as funny or or as "slap stick" as the blurb tries to make it seem. But it does those jobs better than most monster hunter books I have read. Give this book a try. For me, when I catch up some of my tbr list I will be back for more of this series.
September 13, 2022
funny and entertaining
I find it refreshing reading this type of paranormal thriller from a male perspective. This book had me literally loling. I loved Archer’s bromance with Jay and Neil. I like how he mentored Chloe and the kid (no nonsense) even if they were annoying at best. The only thing that got old very quickly about Archer was when he would interrogate cons, he was an over the top @$$hole. Like it really wasn’t necessary as soon as you walk through the door to be that way. But I get that it was a part of his character. I gave the book 4/5 stars because of that. But overall, I really enjoyed the read and might read the second one.
I find it refreshing reading this type of paranormal thriller from a male perspective. This book had me literally loling. I loved Archer’s bromance with Jay and Neil. I like how he mentored Chloe and the kid (no nonsense) even if they were annoying at best. The only thing that got old very quickly about Archer was when he would interrogate cons, he was an over the top @$$hole. Like it really wasn’t necessary as soon as you walk through the door to be that way. But I get that it was a part of his character. I gave the book 4/5 stars because of that. But overall, I really enjoyed the read and might read the second one.
December 21, 2020
You know the guy ... he's That Guy. He wouldn't have a sense of humor at all, would probably say, "actually, werewolves blah blah" and would take everything, including this book, too seriously. Instead, just relax with anything non-IPA and let Ronan take you through a hell of a fun supernatural adventure that had me, at least, literally laughing throughout.
September 5, 2022
There are a lot of monster hunter books out there, this is one of the better reads. Nick's the 50's private eye version of a monster hunter. A stoic, biased, Miller Lite drinking womanizer who tries to save the world monster by monster. What you read is what you get, no hidden agendas for Nick Archer. Kinda funny, for the most part well written with a few checking errors, when instead of her, that type of thing. Overall, it's a good story line with a lot of action.
September 20, 2022
Started out great
I was really in to this story! Interesting take with a handful of twists that were great. Then not quite half way in and the author injected his personal political standing. I read, especially horror and sci-fi to escape politics. Stopped reading at 54% completed and deleted from my account.
I was really in to this story! Interesting take with a handful of twists that were great. Then not quite half way in and the author injected his personal political standing. I read, especially horror and sci-fi to escape politics. Stopped reading at 54% completed and deleted from my account.
April 19, 2022
Archer is a slayer, with the forecast of pending apocalypse, werewolves going crazy, a new apprentice and a welcome to the neighborhood party, he is having a bad few days. Good book, that moves at a nice pace, with an interesting main character.
November 28, 2022
Great fun
Humorous take on slayers, monsters, demons, and the apocalypse. The main character was entertaining and likable. I'm looking forward to reading the next book in the series.
Humorous take on slayers, monsters, demons, and the apocalypse. The main character was entertaining and likable. I'm looking forward to reading the next book in the series.
February 21, 2023
Pure entertainment
Archer has a big ego, but he's earned it. Cloe is a sensible young woman with almost none of the silliness frequently written into female characters. Lots of action and snark make this a fun read. I'm going to look for book 2
Archer has a big ego, but he's earned it. Cloe is a sensible young woman with almost none of the silliness frequently written into female characters. Lots of action and snark make this a fun read. I'm going to look for book 2
March 29, 2023
Awesome book!
I am so terrible at writing reviews but I feel like this was a must. This was a very funny book..had me laughing throughout. Not a boring moment. Characters are well developed. Onto book #2!
I am so terrible at writing reviews but I feel like this was a must. This was a very funny book..had me laughing throughout. Not a boring moment. Characters are well developed. Onto book #2!
June 2, 2026
Good read
Good read. Nick is an interesting character, kind of an ass at times but... Good urban fantasy, a toss up between apocalypse and the monsters. It makes me want to see what happens to the Slayers next.
Good read. Nick is an interesting character, kind of an ass at times but... Good urban fantasy, a toss up between apocalypse and the monsters. It makes me want to see what happens to the Slayers next.
July 14, 2026
I needed this!
The title caught my attention and I can honestly say that I was hooked after the first paragraph. My husband kept giving me the side eye because I was laughing so hard. The snark was pure artistry. It was a beautiful and well needed distraction from reality.
The title caught my attention and I can honestly say that I was hooked after the first paragraph. My husband kept giving me the side eye because I was laughing so hard. The snark was pure artistry. It was a beautiful and well needed distraction from reality.
July 20, 2026
Crazy
Great book. I've read a lot of supposed humor, but this was great. The humor is old, so not really for young people. They wouldn't get a lotcofcthe subtext. I figured it was going to extend into another book, but I'm looking forward to reading it.
Great book. I've read a lot of supposed humor, but this was great. The humor is old, so not really for young people. They wouldn't get a lotcofcthe subtext. I figured it was going to extend into another book, but I'm looking forward to reading it.
March 16, 2021
truly a fun read main lead is a hoot. hate to put down from page one you will love it.
August 18, 2021
Fun Read
If you are looking for a fun read that will keep you turning pages, then this one is for you. Think Duke Nukem fighting the undead. I enjoyed it.
If you are looking for a fun read that will keep you turning pages, then this one is for you. Think Duke Nukem fighting the undead. I enjoyed it.
November 12, 2021
Crazy and fun to read
What a fun story this is. I hope more books are written with the characters of this book . this is a relaxing read.
What a fun story this is. I hope more books are written with the characters of this book . this is a relaxing read.
May 14, 2022
Good fun, fast paced read
Wasn't sure what to expect from this, but it turned out really good! Looking for the next one now, hopefully, I will find it...
Wasn't sure what to expect from this, but it turned out really good! Looking for the next one now, hopefully, I will find it...
October 19, 2022
A full good sister book
Grab a Miller high life and try in the car. It you enjoy MHI or starship for sale this book Silk scratch your itch. So yourself a favor start the series
Grab a Miller high life and try in the car. It you enjoy MHI or starship for sale this book Silk scratch your itch. So yourself a favor start the series
October 23, 2022
Well written story. Made me laugh a lot. After reading this book I immediately wanted to read the rest of the series, to see where the author takes the character.
November 9, 2022
Archer is a dick too.
Too much like evil dead. Just not my thing. I just really do not like Archer. He reminds me too much of the guy from evil dead...hated those movies.
Too much like evil dead. Just not my thing. I just really do not like Archer. He reminds me too much of the guy from evil dead...hated those movies.
November 29, 2022
Fantastic !
This is an exciting start to a winner of
a series. I can't wait to check out the rest! Highly recommend.
This is an exciting start to a winner of
a series. I can't wait to check out the rest! Highly recommend.
December 20, 2022
Good book
Lots of jokes. Blood, combat and gore. Save the world and personal resolution. Shows the importance of dogs. A really fun tail.
Lots of jokes. Blood, combat and gore. Save the world and personal resolution. Shows the importance of dogs. A really fun tail.
January 25, 2024
Great read
It is a brilliant book,humorous and captivating from start to finish.You can't put it down.I can not recommend it enough.
It is a brilliant book,humorous and captivating from start to finish.You can't put it down.I can not recommend it enough.
June 17, 2026
I gave this 3 stars because while not for me, this book was well-written and I'm sure others will enjoy it.
the nonstop verbal putdowns and mental insults were not to my taste.
the nonstop verbal putdowns and mental insults were not to my taste.
July 19, 2026
Action Packed and Hilarious!
Read the whole book in a day! Fast paced action, hysterical dialog and truly entertaining! Going to go look for book 2!
Read the whole book in a day! Fast paced action, hysterical dialog and truly entertaining! Going to go look for book 2!
August 7, 2026
Someone had fun writing this and it's packed full with jargon and pop culture references. Also a pretty accurate view of college professors and departments. Just not my type of genre
August 10, 2026
Sucked me in
A bit against my will, if I am honest, the mysoginistic overtones are painted on with a big brush, so obviously I am not the target audience
A bit against my will, if I am honest, the mysoginistic overtones are painted on with a big brush, so obviously I am not the target audience
February 24, 2020
5 stars
I enjoyed this book. I hope there are more books about Archer and Chloe in the works. This book was snarky, funny, and exciting.
I enjoyed this book. I hope there are more books about Archer and Chloe in the works. This book was snarky, funny, and exciting.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 33 reviews