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Breaking the Ocean: A Memoir of Race, Rebellion, and Reconciliation
Annahid Dashtgard was born into a supportive mixed-race family in 1970s Iran. Then came the 1979 Islamic Revolution, which ushered in a powerful and orthodox religious regime. Her family was forced to flee their homeland, immigrating to a small town in Alberta, Canada. As a young girl, Dashtgard was bullied, shunned, and ostracized by both her peers at school and adults in the community. Home offered little respite as her parents were embroiled in their own struggles, exposing the sharp contrasts between her British mother and Persian father.
Determined to break free from her past, Dashtgard created a new identity for herself as a driven young woman who found strength through political activism, eventually becoming a leader in the anti–corporate globalization movement of the late 1990s. But her unhealed trauma was re-activated following the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Suffering burnout, Dashtgard checked out of her life and took the first steps towards personal healing, a journey that continues to this day.
Breaking the Ocean introduces a unique perspective on how racism and systemic discrimination result in emotional scarring and ongoing PTSD. It is a wake-up call to acknowledge our differences, offering new possibilities for healing and understanding through the revolutionary power of resilience. Dashtgard answers the universal questions of what it means to belong, what it takes to become whole, and ultimately what is required to create change in ourselves and in society.
304 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 20, 2019
16 people are currently reading
402 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews
January 1, 2020
"That girl, whose ancestors defied social norms, who herself crossed ocean, country, and culture to get here, was finally able to see how belonging is worlds apart from acceptance."
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This was a powerhouse of a memoir on immigration, race, and trauma.
Dashtgard hads lived quite a life so far! Coming from a mixed race Iranian family. Her mother is British, her father is Persian. She was born in the 70's, a few years before the Islamic Revolution would happen which introduced a very religious administration to her homeland. Her family was forced to flee and immigrate to Canada. We follow her journey through adolescence into adulthood.
Reading about her upbringing in Canada was heartbreaking. She was bullied and ostracized by her peers and adults alike. Her homelife was difficult as well, between her parents own struggles and her past trauma related health issues.
She begins to carve out a new identity for herself, and even becomes a political activist. Only to suffer a new low when 9/11 strikes, opening old wounds. From there she starts a new journey of healing.
Inspiring, and thought-provoking! Her insider perspective on racism, PTSD, and trauma were very eye opening. And how our society has much to change in terms of accepting people's differences.
Reccomended Reading!
•
Thank You to the tagged publisher for sending me this book opinions are my own.
•
For more of my book content check out instagram.com/bookalong
•
This was a powerhouse of a memoir on immigration, race, and trauma.
Dashtgard hads lived quite a life so far! Coming from a mixed race Iranian family. Her mother is British, her father is Persian. She was born in the 70's, a few years before the Islamic Revolution would happen which introduced a very religious administration to her homeland. Her family was forced to flee and immigrate to Canada. We follow her journey through adolescence into adulthood.
Reading about her upbringing in Canada was heartbreaking. She was bullied and ostracized by her peers and adults alike. Her homelife was difficult as well, between her parents own struggles and her past trauma related health issues.
She begins to carve out a new identity for herself, and even becomes a political activist. Only to suffer a new low when 9/11 strikes, opening old wounds. From there she starts a new journey of healing.
Inspiring, and thought-provoking! Her insider perspective on racism, PTSD, and trauma were very eye opening. And how our society has much to change in terms of accepting people's differences.
Reccomended Reading!
•
Thank You to the tagged publisher for sending me this book opinions are my own.
•
For more of my book content check out instagram.com/bookalong
Read
September 25, 2020Took me too long to finish this, because: classes. Charming book, more so in the beginning. And good timing as I'm also grappling with questions of identity and belonging as a(n) (racialized) immigrant in Canada.
June 4, 2022
I picked this book from a list from CBC because I thought it could be a good one to write about for work. I'm so glad I read it. I learned so much about identity, racism, inclusion, trauma, and healing.
November 17, 2022
Please please please give this one a read. It won’t disappoint! Annahid’s story is so powerful.
Topics include racism, eating disorders, sexual assault, police brutality, etc.
***trigger warning***
Topics include racism, eating disorders, sexual assault, police brutality, etc.
***trigger warning***
September 1, 2019
This autobiography is structured chronologically as the subtitle subtly implies: race, rebellion, and reconciliation.
-1 star because I felt the author (or editor or publisher) was censuring increasingly more details as I read onward. I wanted to know more. I wanted a deeper understanding. This almost seems backward in that a child is likely to have fewer life details than an adolescent, similar in turn to a new graduate, similar in turn to political organiser. Rather, this makes sense given the message being shared is not found in those background details.
For what it's worth, the key, summarizing statement for me came three quarters of the way in: "These days I think perhaps the most revolutionary act any of us can engage in is to reclaim our birthright knowledge that who we are is enough--who we are has always been enough." (p.227)
-1 star because I felt the author (or editor or publisher) was censuring increasingly more details as I read onward. I wanted to know more. I wanted a deeper understanding. This almost seems backward in that a child is likely to have fewer life details than an adolescent, similar in turn to a new graduate, similar in turn to political organiser. Rather, this makes sense given the message being shared is not found in those background details.
For what it's worth, the key, summarizing statement for me came three quarters of the way in: "These days I think perhaps the most revolutionary act any of us can engage in is to reclaim our birthright knowledge that who we are is enough--who we are has always been enough." (p.227)
September 28, 2019
A well-written memoir about the Annahid's experience immigrating first to England and then to Canada as a child and navigating that transfer amidst experiences of racism. The story follows her journey through adolescence and adulthood including struggles with disordered eating, and other trauma-related health issues, as well as her experiences in activism and alternative healing practices. Her personal and political reflections are insightful and interesting and the book has given me a lot to reflect on. It's not didactic; Annahid draws some of her own conclusions but leaves a lot for the reader to think about and I expect to be processing it for some time!
May 9, 2023
A beautifully written memoir that touched on a lot of topics I am interested in. I can only imagine the challenges that would come from culture shock when your family moves to a new country as a young child. Any time I have experienced culture shock I have the added comfort that it is due to personal choices and I always have a home in Ontario to return back too. Things are very different in the case of refuge and the author impressively describes the grief she felt when leaving her home in Iran.
Many times in reading this book I ensured to recognize my privilege of being a white Canadian woman. Many challenges and setbacks that I have never had to surpass. In saying that, I do identify with a lot of the feelings Annahid experiences over the course of her life. Her anger towards political issues that primarily affect marginalized people and communities, environmental issues that seem to be ignored in so many business and policy changes. The physical side effects of dealing with suppressed emotions. I admire that the author recognized the importance of the connection between body and mind while still noting the societal issues that play a role in the challenges to begin with. A well written book that I would recommend for anyone looking to develop a deeper understanding of institutional racism or the experience of healing from trauma. My favourite lines from the book:
'So much detail from my childhood remains buried under protective layers of forgetting.'
'God is God, except when God isn't. Religion is, after all, subject to human dynamics.'
'Names are among the strongest anchors to culture - the mix of consonants, vowels and syllables reflecting the pace, rhythm, and heartbeat of the people they represent.'
'But that is not so very different from any other culture in the world. Nowhere do women have the right to their own bodies as much as men do.'
'If I didn't have to earn love, it lost its appeal.'
'Politics can feel like a faraway sport until there is extreme change in a short period of time, and then it becomes the taste in the back of everyone's throat they can't get rid of - a mixture of bitterness, powerlessness, and grief.'
'Being mixed race only exacerbated the impact of the racist backlash for me. Not having a fixed racial identity meant that I lacked a consistent community of support.'
'Even in the midst of feeling devastated I couldn't help but admire how entitled he felt to name and honour his feelings. How could he do that, I wondered. It seemed such a luxury.'
'It was my first time discovering that I found quiet soothing rather than threatening; I began to be able to differentiate between being alone and feeling lonely.' (Reminds me of a podcast (Jay Shetty) I listened to about the difference of loneliness and solitude.)
'We talked on the phone only once a week and saw each other only once a week. The space between each contact was crucial, as it allowed me to work through the extreme fear that arose in response to our growing emotional intimacy, and the attendant threat of rejection,'
'The way we speak to ourselves, especially in the face of distress, plays a huge role in either calming or escalating the body's response.
'Every living thing - plant, animal and human - desires nothing more than to truly be listened to.'
Many times in reading this book I ensured to recognize my privilege of being a white Canadian woman. Many challenges and setbacks that I have never had to surpass. In saying that, I do identify with a lot of the feelings Annahid experiences over the course of her life. Her anger towards political issues that primarily affect marginalized people and communities, environmental issues that seem to be ignored in so many business and policy changes. The physical side effects of dealing with suppressed emotions. I admire that the author recognized the importance of the connection between body and mind while still noting the societal issues that play a role in the challenges to begin with. A well written book that I would recommend for anyone looking to develop a deeper understanding of institutional racism or the experience of healing from trauma. My favourite lines from the book:
'So much detail from my childhood remains buried under protective layers of forgetting.'
'God is God, except when God isn't. Religion is, after all, subject to human dynamics.'
'Names are among the strongest anchors to culture - the mix of consonants, vowels and syllables reflecting the pace, rhythm, and heartbeat of the people they represent.'
'But that is not so very different from any other culture in the world. Nowhere do women have the right to their own bodies as much as men do.'
'If I didn't have to earn love, it lost its appeal.'
'Politics can feel like a faraway sport until there is extreme change in a short period of time, and then it becomes the taste in the back of everyone's throat they can't get rid of - a mixture of bitterness, powerlessness, and grief.'
'Being mixed race only exacerbated the impact of the racist backlash for me. Not having a fixed racial identity meant that I lacked a consistent community of support.'
'Even in the midst of feeling devastated I couldn't help but admire how entitled he felt to name and honour his feelings. How could he do that, I wondered. It seemed such a luxury.'
'It was my first time discovering that I found quiet soothing rather than threatening; I began to be able to differentiate between being alone and feeling lonely.' (Reminds me of a podcast (Jay Shetty) I listened to about the difference of loneliness and solitude.)
'We talked on the phone only once a week and saw each other only once a week. The space between each contact was crucial, as it allowed me to work through the extreme fear that arose in response to our growing emotional intimacy, and the attendant threat of rejection,'
'The way we speak to ourselves, especially in the face of distress, plays a huge role in either calming or escalating the body's response.
'Every living thing - plant, animal and human - desires nothing more than to truly be listened to.'
March 2, 2020
I wanted to read this book not only because I would be interested in any memoir which explores racial issues in Canada, but also because I remember meeting this author, during the mid to late 90s at a social justice retreat when I had young children (and before she had her own children). In this book, she tells her life story, from growing up in Iran as mixed-race to a Persian father and a British mother, to moving to Britain, and then to Canada. It is not until she is mid-life (in her 40s) and after her kids were born that a therapist diagnoses her with post-traumatic stress disorder, and she is dismayed that it had taken so long after she had sought out many kinds of therapies, medical doctors, alternative therapists, naturopaths and energy healers over the years. She writes of the way that the stress manifested itself in her body and her behaviour over the years, and of her anger towards Ayatollah Khomeini, who forced her family to leave behind family and home when she was a young girl (about 12 years old) and go to small village in Britain where she faced horrific racism and exclusion. From there to Edmonton, Alberta where she also faced ongoing racism and bullying. She found more of a sense of belonging when she ended up in multiracial Toronto. Her career involved both political activism and inner spiritual work, and without going back to find exact quotes from the book, she writes about crucial insights about the way these things need to work together, and how often the white leaders/teachers in individual therapies or spiritual work are blind to the systemic racism faced by people of colour, and also how many people who are actively engaged in fighting systemic oppression are not finding or creating safe spaces in which the impacts on their bodies and their lives can be acknowledged. Many important insights here and I will go back and look at this book again, and hope that Annahid Dashtgard intends to do more writing.
July 8, 2020
Important book in the understanding of diversity and antiracism/racism. I loved this book for its honesty, courage, intelligence and self awareness, for its understanding of and analysis of racism encountered by a young girl who immigrated to Canada from Persia/Iran with her Iranian father and British mother and two younger siblings. Raised in Alberta in a primarily white environment Dashtgard did not find herself represented among the white children and teachers around her. Bullied, misunderstood, unsupported around these experiences in her family struggling to survive themelves in this hostile environment, she grew up with trauma unresolved until midlife when she had already been a prominent activist, organizer, speaker and married with young children Finally part of a mixed community that was comfortable for her and her young family and finding a therapist with relevant understanding, she was able to write and finish this must read book. It helps us uunderstand the issues underlying the racism in our society. About the privilege of the white majority. Yes, all of this, and at the same time I was impressed by the wonderful writing and the luminous understanding of the author. It extended my own understanding and how necessary it is for each of us to recognize how we must be involved in critical changes both within ourselves and in society.
November 5, 2020
This is a beautiful book that I highly recommend for the incredible vulnerability and straight up honesty that fills every page. It was a privilege to be welcomed into the life of the author - her struggles and her victories. This is a journey of a person evolving through different experiences and identities. I felt these different identities were pieces of a puzzle that the author was putting together for herself, and ultimately showing us how brilliantly they came together.
There is a blurring of lines between our personal and professional lives. For some people, this is easy. For others, they are intertwined. This book shows how this can be self-destructive but also displays that this tearing down of the self is sometimes necessary for personal growth. The book is an educational tool that explores issues like trauma and racism through the lens of one person’s story. To me, stories like this are so important to share, to engage with, to seek out.
And the writing is so poetic. It’s not often that I come across a memoir that I am so emotionally invested in while at the same time finding myself re-reading passages to let them be appreciated and fully allow the words to sink in. It’s at times heartbreaking, thought-provoking, and profound.
There is a blurring of lines between our personal and professional lives. For some people, this is easy. For others, they are intertwined. This book shows how this can be self-destructive but also displays that this tearing down of the self is sometimes necessary for personal growth. The book is an educational tool that explores issues like trauma and racism through the lens of one person’s story. To me, stories like this are so important to share, to engage with, to seek out.
And the writing is so poetic. It’s not often that I come across a memoir that I am so emotionally invested in while at the same time finding myself re-reading passages to let them be appreciated and fully allow the words to sink in. It’s at times heartbreaking, thought-provoking, and profound.
February 28, 2022
A beautiful story of belonging in many ways—in your country, in your family, in your movement(s), even in your own body. Dashtgard is a skillful writer and storyteller, with the rare ability to turn deeply personal experiences into moments of insight for everyone, challenging the system that remain invisible and unconsidered for so many of us.
I especially loved the section on diving into and feeling consumed—in a bad way—by politics and progressive movements. Sometimes I felt like I was the only person asking questions about tensions and inconsistencies in the left and it was so deeply validating to read someone else’s experiences that spoke the same truth in many ways (and that’s with the added cushion of my own white identity moving in these spaces, even as a woman).
Recommended reading, especially to the other women I know navigating those same political spaces. I dog-eared so many pages for future reference!
I especially loved the section on diving into and feeling consumed—in a bad way—by politics and progressive movements. Sometimes I felt like I was the only person asking questions about tensions and inconsistencies in the left and it was so deeply validating to read someone else’s experiences that spoke the same truth in many ways (and that’s with the added cushion of my own white identity moving in these spaces, even as a woman).
Recommended reading, especially to the other women I know navigating those same political spaces. I dog-eared so many pages for future reference!
February 29, 2024
Dashtgard has unpacked and studied every aspect of the self and opens for us such deep layers of her inner battles as she grows. I found myself repeatedly noticing increasingly insightful clarity for young & overwhelmed activists who are pushing to keep making the world better for younger people like themselves. As a side note, I have long struggled with cPTSD from my experience finding my voice in crip and mad culture struggling and pushing and grieving to cope as a disabled sexual assault survivor and advocate who focuses on working with employers and govt agencies to show what invisible barriers at limiting non dominant culture hires around here. I was amazed how many times her topics felt like I could have written them myself. Her memory and the work she’s done to fully unpack the change of her lived experience is insightful showing where and how pain has sat in her life. This. I’ll is so great for any & every advocate & board member and community builder.
November 23, 2021
This book was as relateable as it was heartbreaking. Annahid weaves a well paced, deeply-self-aware, and insightful memoir. As she drew back the layers of her becoming throughout the book, I felt empowered to reflect on my own life experiences and interrogate my upbringing (and their lasting impact in who I am today) in ways that I hadn't thought of previously.
At times, her prose is so beautiful that it gave me pause in my otherwise fervent dash to read onwards. The through-line in her life's journey is a piercing reminder that we all have work to do towards in assessing, analyzing, brokering peace with, and accepting of our own traumas. So many facets of her story were a reflection of my own journey, I have no doubt that other readers - especially those grappling with questions of their own identity, societal, social, and self-acceptance - will resonate with a lot of the content.
At times, her prose is so beautiful that it gave me pause in my otherwise fervent dash to read onwards. The through-line in her life's journey is a piercing reminder that we all have work to do towards in assessing, analyzing, brokering peace with, and accepting of our own traumas. So many facets of her story were a reflection of my own journey, I have no doubt that other readers - especially those grappling with questions of their own identity, societal, social, and self-acceptance - will resonate with a lot of the content.
December 30, 2021
Excellent. What a passionate and fine mind Annahid Dashtgard has, and she uses it for justice. Great insights on race today, someone born in Iran, in 1970s Iran. Her family is supported, and after the 1979Revolution, she and her family fled their homeland, immigrating to Alberta, Canada. She was bullied, shamed, shunned and ostracized for bein different, having dark skin. She introduces a view as to how racism and systemic discrimination result in emotional scarring and ongoing PTSTD. She triumphs in my opinion. and She is to provide insights regarding universal questions as to what itis to belong, and what is needed to create change in ourselves and society. Wonderful accounted.
February 17, 2020
This book explained a few things to me about activism in the 90s for one thing and about the need to bring personal awareness into the political arena. Annahid Dashtgard's honest and articulate description of her experience is a window into a reality i truly am glad to have seen. I have always been fascinated by the way each generation does what it does for the world as it marches on. Definitely a good read!
November 24, 2019
"I've realized that the larger forces of trauma will never completely disappear, but they are no longer the dominant notes in the music score of my life."
This is an inspiring story. A reminder that we don't always know what people around us have overcome.
This is an inspiring story. A reminder that we don't always know what people around us have overcome.
March 31, 2020
An excellent, heart-breaking at times, thorough and beautiful memoir. I found myself nodding along with Annahid at times. She shared so many stories that made me understand her world in a really brilliant way.
July 5, 2020
An exquisitely written, open-hearted memoir about race and love and family and body and belonging and the things we can never fully understand about each other’s lives and all the reasons to try anyway. I’m so glad the author wrote this book.
October 8, 2021
A good look into the revolution in Iran and the childhood of a displaced biracial child.
Annahid's life is a gold standard for us all to value the environment and social responsibilities over the greed of large corporations.
Biographies are not my favorite genre hence the 3 stars.
Annahid's life is a gold standard for us all to value the environment and social responsibilities over the greed of large corporations.
Biographies are not my favorite genre hence the 3 stars.
February 6, 2025
I had to read this for school, and I was delightfully surprised how much I enjoyed it (as I often do not enjoy forced reads). I would read this again -- well written and really conveys the voice of the story.
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October 22, 2019Review forthcoming with Hamilton Review of Books in November : )
December 21, 2019
Decent book, enjoyed the first half capturing the cross cultural back and forth the most.
March 21, 2020
A great memoir about race, activism, and trauma, and racism in Canada. Annahid's voice is very strong. The writing is good and the story is compelling.
March 28, 2020
Difficult, heart-wrenching, powerful. A worthwhile read for all
June 2, 2020
A heartbreaking account of life in Canada as it is not very often told. Angry and honest but also beautifully written and gracious.
July 21, 2020
Enjoyed the story of the author's experience immigrating to Canada and growing up in the culture. Some parts were hard to read (racism, conflicted views) but I liked it overall.
February 27, 2024
Another great memoir reminding me of the diversity in people's experiences.
December 16, 2023
Inspiring. I felt I had parallel experiences with her in regards to parenting and individual experiences. I have read immigrant literature starting with "Reading Lolita in Tehran" by Azar Nafisi, and Breaking the Ocean has had the same weight and attraction for me.
It was the first immigrant literature that shed some more lights onto the Canadian living adventure of immigrants rather than the journey growing up in Iran.
I was shocked how the author speaks so much with ease of her rock bottom moments and how beautifully she has risen from her ashes.
Bravo!
It was the first immigrant literature that shed some more lights onto the Canadian living adventure of immigrants rather than the journey growing up in Iran.
I was shocked how the author speaks so much with ease of her rock bottom moments and how beautifully she has risen from her ashes.
Bravo!
Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews