The Half Orphan's Handbook

by Joan F. Smith

For fans of John Green and Emily X.R. Pan, The Half-Orphan's Handbook by Joan F. Smith is a coming-of-age story and an empathetic, authentic exploration of grief with a sharp sense of humor and a big heart.

It’s been three months since Lila lost her father to suicide. Since then, she’s learned to protect herself from pain by following two unbreakable rules:

1. The only people who can truly hurt you are the ones you love. Therefore, love no one.

2. Stay away from liars. Liars are the worst.

But when Lila’s mother sends her to a summer-long grief camp, it’s suddenly harder for Lila to follow these rules. Potential new friends and an unexpected crush threaten to drag her back into life for the first time since her dad’s death.

On top of everything, there’s more about what happened that Lila doesn’t know, and facing the truth about her family will be the hardest part of learning how a broken heart can love again.

Genres: Young Adult, Contemporary, Romance, Fiction, Young Adult Contemporary, Grief, Realistic Fiction

320 pages, Hardcover

First published April 20, 2021

Reviews

[Melanie (mells_view) · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Half-Orphan's Handbook is a deeply emotional YA contemporary that discusses grief, guilt, and loss with an edge of humor to lighten it up. Add in a camp setting and friendship, and you've got a incredibly well written story that covers some heavy topics. That said, you definitely need to be in the mood to read about those heavier topics, and honestly be prepared to cry a bit. Lila's journey through her grief is a great story. Have your tissues ready, but don't fret you will smile as well.

CW: grief, death of a parent, references to suicide, underage drinking

Available NOW!
*ARC

[cherelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

"I can’t think of a one-word antonym for liar. Maybe that’s how it’s supposed to be, because there’s more than one way to tell the truth."

Read the full review here on my blog!

The Half-Orphan’s Handbook was such a beautiful, heartfelt and nuanced debut! I truly appreciated the writing style and balance achieved, especially with its moving discussion and exploration of grief, loss and acceptance through our characters. Definitely one to pick up and treasure! <33

3.5 stars

Thank you to Xpresso Book Tours, Imprint and Netgalley, for a copy of this book in exchange for a sincere review!

[Laura Namey · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was lucky to read an early copy of this book and it is a masterpiece. Beautiful characters face the true and tough realities of the world and life. Joan F. Smith gives teens a book that merges humor with grief and the tools to find hope while reconciling the unanswerable. Stunning.

[Rebecca Phillips · Rating 5 out of 5]

My Author Mentor Match mentee. <3

This book is beautiful. You're not even ready.

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

"It’s been three months since Lila lost her father to suicide. Since then, she’s learned to protect herself from pain by following two unbreakable rules:
1. The only people who can truly hurt you are the ones you love. Therefore, love no one.
2. Stay away from liars. Liars are the worst."

Like I said I went to summer camp when I was in elementary to high school only for a week at a time and I love the camp experience. This whole idea of camp for adolescents that have lost someone is such a beautiful idea. Losing a parent or loved one is beyond hard.  To lose a family member when you are just finding yourself as a person, when you are a kid or teen is tragic and irreparable. To be surrounded by others that understand and don't pity you must be a treasure in your grief.

I enjoyed this book so much! I felt Lila's grief, I felt all of theirs actually. Lila's growth in her pain and learning to live with her loss was very healing. It is hard to remember that loss isn't something "to get over" it is something to learn to live with and learn who you are now without this person. 

I loved the romances going on which honestly close proximity is real! 

The rules she made at the beginning of her summer grew and some dropped off and as she learned from others grief and lessons.

Also, I liked how it brought in that there are different types of grief and not all loss is because of death. 

Also, the stigma of how your family member dies if it is a "shameful" choice or because of illegal actions reflects on the living family members unfortunately. I don't think the living relatives lives should be judged cause of their deceased relatives actions.

Thank you to @fiercereads  for sending me a copy of the book for my honest and voluntary review!

[Allison · Rating 5 out of 5]

I write this as a licensed psychologist who has been in practice for over a decade: this is an important book for teens. Youth survivors of suicide are a unique group, and a lonely group. They often feel unseen, alienated from their peers and the world. This book is one thing that may help such youth feel more connected and find hope. It's also a useful book for friends and family of teens who have suffered a loss, for building empathy and perspective. To boot, it's artfully plotted, beautifully written, high on authenticity.

I have purchased several copies for my private practice, to give to teens who have been through this experience. For me, there's no greater endorsement.

[Cynthia]

I wonder how many tissues I will need for this one. I am immensely grateful to Imprint and NetGalley for my digital review copy.

[Alex (The Scribe Owl) · Rating 3 out of 5]

See this review and more at my blog, The Scribe Owl!

Thank you to Xpresso Book Tours for an ARC in exchange for an honest review!

3/5 stars

The Half-Orphan's Handbook is a heavy-hitting novel about grief and love.

The Half-Orphan's Handbook is both heavy and lighthearted at the same time. Joan F. Smith mixes humor and hard topics with ease to make for an entertaining read. But for some reason, this book and I just didn't connect. I'll come back to this later but, although it was well done, things just weren't working out. It was me, not you!

In The Half-Orphan's Handbook we follow Lila, a sixteen-year-old girl who recently lost her father to suicide. As you can guess, she's not taking it very well. To try and help, her mother decides to send her to an eight-week-long grief camp and won't take no for an answer. There a reluctant Lila makes friends, a more-than-friend, and lets the pieces of her heart come back together.

Let me just say it now. Someone needs to read this book and that someone is not me. This is such a powerful book and I know that it's exactly what some people need in their lives. If you're going through anything like what Lila did, please give this book a try. But part of why I think I didn't like it as much was that I don't require it in my life right now. I am blessed with a happy and whole family and it just didn't resonate in the way that it would for its target audience.

While I liked the aspects of grief and healing from it, I could have done without the romance. I know that it helps make the book a little more lighthearted, but it just felt like an extra element. YA contemporary? Romance required!

What I did like in the way of relationships were the numerous friendships. It's not something you see in YA nearly enough. There was even *gasp* a platonic relationship with a guy and a girl? Inconceivable!

All in all, this was a beautiful book and one that I think could resound with many people. I hope those readers find this book and it helps them get through a rough part in their lives.

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Many thanks to EdelweissPlus and the publisher for providing me with a DRC of this title for review. All opinions are my own.

This was a fantastic, heartbreaking book about grief and moving on. Lila's father died by suicide and she was completely blindsided. As she struggles with her grief, she starts a list of rules, the Half Orphans Handbook, that she thinks will help her to avoid this type of hurt in the future. She never could have imagined something like this happening and she thinks that if she just knew WHY he did it, she would be able to move on. To get over it. To feel better again. But her mom tells her she doesn't have all the information yet. That she will tell Lila when she knows more and is sure of the information. And until then, she thinks Lila should head to summer camp. For kids who have experienced loss. Lila agrees to a week, but then is faced with the choice of getting kicked out or putting in the work and staying for the eight weeks. She stays, but learns that her rules won't always save her from pain. And that missing pain means you also miss life.

Highly recommend. First purchase book especially for collections where readers enjoy realistic fiction.

[Erin · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Stars

Note: I was provided with an ARC by the publisher through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. All opinions here are my own.

Definitely more humor in this one than I was expecting... in a good way. This book does a great job of blending summer-camp-story shenanigans with real grief and healing. I love that the characters in this book tend toward honesty. One of my particular peeves in contemporary YA is just how much drama is happens because somebody is holding back the truth. I hate it, actually, and this book does a good job of avoiding that type of drama. Though the romance felt like it was a little too heavy for a book that should primarily be about healing after tragedy, it was still cute to read, and though the character voice is nothing new or unique, it was still easy to sink into this narrative and enjoy. A solid read, even if it could have been better.

My full review will be available at Gateway Reviews on June 4, 2021.

[Jill · Rating 4 out of 5]

It’s been three months since Lila lost her father to suicide. Since then, she’s learned to protect herself from pain by following two unbreakable rules:

1. The only people who can truly hurt you are the ones you love. Therefore, love no one.
2. Stay away from liars. Liars are the worst.

But when Lila’s mother sends her to a summer-long grief camp, it’s suddenly harder for Lila to follow these rules. Potential new friends and an unexpected crush threaten to drag her back into life for the first time since her dad’s death.

The Half-Orphan's Handbook is a sweet coming-of-age story as well as an empathetic, authentic exploration of grief. This book has a big heart. It’s perfect for fans of John Green and other YA tear-jerkers. Lila is a likeable character and you can’t help but root for her and all the other kids at camp.

One small quibble: the running scenario was not very believable. I don’t care how young you are – no one can go from barely being able to run a 10-min mile to running a 7-mile road race with a sub 7-min mile pace after training for four weeks in the August heat. Sorry! :)

Thank you #netgalley for the #arc in exchange for an honest review.

[kim · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 ⭐️ rounded (up because a snippet made me cry)

“Because here was the thing. My handbook had a set of rules that I’d committed to living by, but there was a huge hurdle — the biggest one I’d ever try to jump. I imagined — blocking me from knowing how to commit to the rules. I was in an emotional tug-of-war that pulled outward like a spiderweb: Grief. Friendship. Desire. Trying to move on without leaving my dad behind. Everything spun together in the question-marked-shaped center.

No matter what the answer was, it wouldn’t change what had happened, but it could maybe get me the drive to move on. That information was mine, or at least my mom’s, and who was she to decide when I was ready to know it or not?”

Grief Therapy + Camp Setting = Grief Camp? This book was made for me.

All the camp activities and the camp dynamic was so much fun to read. It was full of quips, puns, and witty humour.

It was beautiful to read Lila slowly grow to Camp and create bonds with the people there. Sammy has a place in my heart. So does Jeff. I don’t think the love story with Noah was necessary, but I didn’t hate it. Yes, the story could’ve been without it, imo, but I liked the message of still being able to let someone in while making yourself happy.

Admittedly, I got a little bored closer to the end, but this book was still enjoyable.

[Lindsay · Rating 2 out of 5]

So this started off slow, hooked me, and then left me disappointed after the 30% mark. The concept was perfect but the execution lagged. I realized at 52% that nothing was happening despite a regular camp story: lots of underage drinking and gossiping. Plus Lila and Noah exchanged a few sentences before making out and deciding they loved each other, and that ruined the story for me. I also didn't appreciate Sammy and his 11/12 year old self acting like a sexist, womanizing man. Everyone laughed and thought he was adorable but I kept cringing when he uttered his lines. There wasn't much healing which I hated because that is what made me want to read the book in the first place. I really wanted to like this one but I became more detached the further I read. Thank you Edelweiss for an ARC.

[Trigger Warning Database]

Trigger & Content Warnings

Grief & loss depiction
Death of a father from suicide

[Eclectic Review · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lila didn't want to go to Camp Bonaventure (Dead Parent Camp to Lila) in Maine. It's a grief camp you send kids to bond with others who have lost loved ones. At her mother's insistence, it's just one more thing out of Lila's control. Well, at least she's not going alone. Her precocious twelve-year-old brother Sammy is going with her. 

Lila's loss of her father is a journey filled with doubts, guilt, loneliness, anger, understanding, and most importantly friendship. I love the strong friendships in this book which I see as lifelong. Who better to understand you, than these kids who are going through the same thing? Lila, Madison, and Winnie come from different backgrounds but are able to talk openly about their feelings which sometimes cannot be done with others you've known all of your life.  I must say I love Sammy and I wish I had a thoughtful and cool little brother like him.  As for Noah, Lila's love interest, his tragic reason for being at the camp is a difficult one and would be very hard to live with. I understand Lila being angry at first about him not telling her and I'm glad she forgave him.

Ms. Smith presents the stages of grief and the stigma of death with a fine balance of young adult humor and revelry and the heartbreaking reality of guilt and loss. Listening to the tragic and real stories of each of the characters is painful as they battle with the question of why it happened and how they deal with it. The activities at the camp are clever and well thought out for the mental well-being of the campers and Jeff, the camp director, is an important character in the story who has a tragic background himself.

I recommend this beautifully written debut novel to people of all ages who have suffered a loss. 

Thank you to Ms. Smith for giving me the opportunity to read this book with no expectation of a positive review.

[Lacey Mubanga · Rating 4 out of 5]

This story is a wonderful exploration of grief, mainly centered on the death by suicide of a parent. A few months after Lila’s father commits suicide, she is sent to a summer camp for other kids going through the same thing. There we watch a handful of kids deal with their own losses. I loved the setting of this book. Even this type of summer camp was enjoyable to read. The way the author mixed portions of dealing with their pain and just having some fun was actually enjoyable to read. Though the underlying reason for this book is sad, it is not a sad book. I feel like it was very realistic in how it portrayed kids dealing with these tragedies at their age.

The romance in here was realistic, for sure, but a couple of things happened that I was not a fan of. That is purely a personal preference, but the main reason that this book just cannot get 5-stars from me. I highly recommend this YA novel if you enjoy books centered around the grief and healing.

[Tela · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5⭐️⭐️⭐️

So i really had a hard time understanding the MC. Mostly because she gave me an younger then 16 vibe. But i get that if you have been shelterd of and had a really easy going life , always the good girl that you be like this.

Its was mostly a camp story. But it really captured the grieving side feelings. It had some advice and really captured the grieving side.

The side characters missed some depth, and the insta love I didn’t felt that. However its a good book emotionally.

There are some triggering parts so if you want to read this remember it really talks about all sorts of los!

[PinkAmy loves books, cats and naps · Rating 2 out of 5]

If you’ve ever read a book about a reluctant teen who’s sent to grief camp, you’ve already read THE HALF-ORPHAN’S HANDBOOK.

This predictable book has nothing but tropes you’ve seen before. Lila tells reluctantly agrees to go for one week of the eight week camp, but readers know she’ll stay for the whole time and she’ll embrace the opportunity. Of course she will.

THE HALF-ORPHAN’S HANDBOOK vacillates between heavy-handed in-your-face Big Issues and lighthearted camp shenanigans.

Grief camp can’t be complete without Instalove.

Debut writer Joan F Smith mustn’t have done research on therapeutic camps, because she’d have readers believe the experience was cost prohibitive, when similar camps are funded by foundations and often free to campers. At the very least they have scholarships for low income folks. I can forgive the creative license for making the came all summer rather than open to more kids for one week intervals, because the story was much better over eight weeks than it would have been at one. Better research would have had licensed therapists at the camp.

If you don’t mind reading books you’ve seen before, THE HALF-ORPHAN’S HANDBOOK isn’t a bad book. There’s just nothing fresh or original here.

[Kate · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read THE HALF ORPHAN’S HANDBOOK in a single weekend, completely mesmerized by this beautiful story of grief and healing. The summer after her father’s suicide, 16-year-old Lila’s mother pressures her to attend a camp for children and teens who have lost a loved one. The eight weeks that follow are profound and life-altering. Friendships are made, loss is borne with those who can truly understand it, and love is dared. Lila’s journey is so beautifully told. While ‘grief camp’ sounds like it could be a lot of weight for the reader, the camp setting and the shared experience of this marvelously detailed cast of characters somehow help us bear the heaviness of the subject. Joan F. Smith’s balancing act in that regard is remarkable. Humor is injected at just the right times, the prose is lyrical, and the portrayal of new friendships and first loves is pitch-perfect. An absolutely gorgeous story, gorgeously told. I wish I’d had this for my students back in my child psychology days. THE HALF ORPHAN’S HANDBOOK should be in libraries everywhere there are young adults. Many thanks to the publisher and to NetGalley for the eARC.

[iamanolive · Rating 1 out of 5]

A book featuring grief and also possible tears?? With really promising writing? Along with a brilliant concept THAT IS A GRIEF CAMP THAT TAKES PLACE OVER THE SUMMER? GOSH, I think it would be perfectly normal for a SANE human to be excited like that. I mean obviously, thoughts may well differ if we're talking about insane humans (such as you, my precious olive, I SEE YOU!) here, but since we're not, POINT IS, I WAS INSANELY EXCITED, as is tradition.

WELL, we might arrive at the obvious conclusion from all the past tense we currently seem to be drowning under THAT MY EXPECTATIONS WERE... LET DOWN. Yeah, and i assume that would have been FINE if i was 'mildly disappointed by said book but only mostly because i had ground-breakingly high expectations because HEY BOOKS ARE AMAZING AND WE'RE IN THE HABIT OF BEING GENERALLY EXCITED HERE plus all those raving reviews all the people PRACTICALLY SHOVED INTO MY FACE and then i just ended up sobbing a little because i need to learn how to control my aforementioned expectations a bit, BECAUSE LIFE IS DISAPPOINTING SOMETIMES'. yeah, that would have been FINNNNEEE. BUT THAT WAS NOT THE CASE. BECAUSE THOSE WE NOT MY THOUGHTS!

So you might say, "Anoushka SHUT UP WITH ALL THE SUSPENSE and just tell me what your thoughts were or i'm running away, because honestly? I DON'T BOTHER AS MUCH, GOOD BYE" YES. THOUGHTS OF THE OLIVE GO ALONG THE LINES OF:
'What the hell - did I just waste my weekend on this?? THIS WAS SO BAD I'M SO DISAPPOINTED I CAN'T EVEN FORMULATE PROPER THOUGHTS, MY WEEKEND -'  This review is mostly a mess BUT LIKE I SPENT HOURS creating sentences so I'm posting it anyway. Also, it's a rant so it's rude because I hated this book. I suggest you don't continue if you liked the book because I’M RANTING AND IT’S A RUDE RANT. Bye. 




ABOUT THE BOOK

Title: The Half Orphan's Handbook
Author: Joan F. Smith 
Genre: Contemporary
Age Category: Young Adult
Page Count: 320 pages
Publish Date: April 6th 2021
Publisher: Imprint
Rating: 1.5/5




GOODREADS SYNOPSIS

For fans of John Green and Emily X.R. Pan, The Half-Orphan's Handbook by Joan F. Smith is a coming-of-age story and an empathetic, authentic exploration of grief with a sharp sense of humor and a big heart.

It’s been three months since Lila lost her father to suicide. Since then, she’s learned to protect herself from pain by following two unbreakable rules:

1. The only people who can truly hurt you are the ones you love. Therefore, love no one.

2. Stay away from liars. Liars are the worst.

But when Lila’s mother sends her to a summer-long grief camp, it’s suddenly harder for Lila to follow these rules. Potential new friends and an unexpected crush threaten to drag her back into life for the first time since her dad’s death.

On top of everything, there’s more about what happened that Lila doesn’t know, and facing the truth about her family will be the hardest part of learning how a broken heart can love again.




THE OLIVE'S REVIEW AND ALL THAT SHE HATED 

1. Lila, the protagonist, IS SO ANNOYING, IT'S INFURIATING. And hers is the only story that is given in detail, and all the other backstories are so short and like it's as if we're supposed to be too busy feeling sorry for her to bother about the other characters?? AND DID I MENTION I HATE HER PERSONALITY.

2. I actually liked her in the beginning, BECAUSE SHE LIKES BOOKS AND I LIKE BOOKS SO I LIKE THE MC, but then I WAS SO DISAPPOINTED??! like the entire book is just her being miserable and pathetic and SHE'S TOO BUSY FEELING SORRY FOR HERSELF TO EVEN GIVE A THOUGHT ABOUT WHAT ANYONE ELSE MIGHT BE GOING THROUGH. I MEAN, THE WAY SHE BEHAVES TO HER MOM??? her brother and her mom have lost someone they love too. BUT THROUGHOUT THE STORY SHE ACTS AS IF IT'S JUST HER LOSS ALONE! everyone at camp is suffering with grief, but the book is screaming at us "HEY SEE LILA JUST LOST HER DAD AND HER LIFE IS VERY MISERABLE WE NEED TO FEEL SORRY FOR HER AND CRY OKAY. OH, YOU ASK ABOUT ALL THE OTHER KIDS AT CAMP? WELL, LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT, THEY DON'T MATTER, SO DON'T BOTHER. JUST LILA HERE. FEEL SORRY FOR HER EVERYONE"

3. The romance was TERRIBLE. i hate noah, I LITERALLY HATE EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER (except perhaps madison?? she's pretty okay-okay) but i hate noah, and WOAH DUDE SUSPICIOUS MUCH? something was definitely up with this kid from the very beginning AND IT WAS ALL SO OBVIOUS, but Lila obviously didn't know because HEY, DIDN'T WE ALREADY CEMENT THE FACT THAT SHE IS TOO PREOCCUPIED WITH THE TASK OF FEELING SORRY FOR HERSELF SO SHE'S BUSY OKAY? WE DON'T BOTHER HER FOR MINUTE, CRYSTAL-CLEAR THINGS LIKE THIS.

4. BUT what I liked about the book was the descriptions of s’mores, which managed to win my heart and AND THEN TOASTING THEM was such fun it made my mouth water AND THERE WAS ALSO CHOCOLATE (which i love) and i mean, i felt terrible insulting chocolate like that okay? SO THE HALF STAR IS FOR THE CHOCOLATE

5. Okay no, but I actually remember picking this book up sometime last year AND I WAS HOOKED I TELL YOU. I reached about the midway point, AND I WAS SLOWLY FALLING IN LOVE WITH EVERYTHING. But then... something happened. Or maybe nothing happened but I just abruptly stopped? BUT THEN I REMEMBERED LOVING IT ONE FINE DAY A FEW DAYS AGO and decided to pick it up again. THE BEGINNING BORED ME THIS TIME AROUND. me being innocent and smol, i blamed that on the fact that maybe it was because i'd already read the beginning and knew everything SO IT WASN'T AS ENTERTAINING but it would get better. I WAS, UNFORTUNATELY, SO WRONG. It just got worse from there onwards? It was still hooking and THERE'S A MYSTERY-ISH PLOTLINE to it, which I LIKED, but then when it was revealed, IT JUST WASN'T WORTH THE WAIT, you know? I was angry. I was sad. And I cried a little. 

6. I hate how the Noah plotline also isn't delved into that much, LIKE DETAILS PLEASE?? We’re just TOLD what's up with his family and asked to believe without ever questioning anything AND THERE’S NO REASONS as to why it happened/was done and like, it's.... Not believable. IF YOU WANT ME TO LIKE A STORY, you shall need to give me more than just the protagonist blaming the SEEMINGLY GUILTY PARTY OVER HERE without ever delving into the full story. I was disappointed. 

7. The entire ‘i’m Lila and I hate liars thing’?? WHAT THE HELL EVEN WAS THAT?! No seriously, like I DO NOT GET IT. I get how Lila’s dad, having committed suicide and thus having lied to the family for ages, she has a problem with people lying, BUT THAT IS LILA’S ONLY EXPLANATION. The entire book was SO DRAMATIC and Lila was so DRAMATIC and I get how it's supposed to deal with grief AND I LOVE THAT and I USUALLY ALSO LOVE DRAMA, but this.... No. 

8. I also hated the romance. It was just overly dramatic without needing to be. See the romance over here is this STUPID thing that goes along like this: “Lila: GAHHHHH I LOVE YOU BUT I CANT HAVE YOU BECAUSE OF SOME RANDOM STUPID RULES I’VE CREATED FOR LIFE THAT I CAN NEVER BREAK BECUASE THEYRE RULES AND RULES ARE UNBREAKABLE BUT MAYBE I ALSO CAN BECAUSE I REALLY LIKE YOU AND WANT TO BREAK RULES WHAT DO I DO?’ in the first part and LET’S NOT RECOUNT THE SECOND PART BECAUSE TBH IT’S WORSE AND UGH I HATE EVERYTHING.

9. Lila punches someone AND THAT WAS LIKE MY FAVORITE SCENE because I also learnt how you must not keep your thumbs inside you fist while punching someone because they might break like that.

10. But this book was... Over. LILA’S CHARACTER WAS TERRIBLE. The way she treated everyone was terrible. HOW SHE NEVER FIGURED ANYTHING OUT ABOUT NOAH WAS SERIOUSLY INFURIATING, like GIRL you talk about people lying and you hate them to the end of the universe because of it BUT YOU’RE SO PRE-OCCUPIED WITH YOUR OWN PROBLEMS you never even bother paying attention to what's happening in someone else’s life?? ESPECIALLY WHEN IT WAS ALL SO CLEAR. #Stupidity. And then you obviously HAVE NO RIGHT COMPLAINING. Because stupidity. 

11. This is not to say that this book was completely TERRIBLE. It was not. Some parts of it were so BEAUTIFULLY WRITTEN and just GORGEOUS. It was still entertaining because I kept wanting to know the story. But because of all the above-mentioned points - everything else GOT OVERSHADOWED. This book had a lot of potential for being much more complex and HAVING A GREAT PLOT because the concept was great. But I hated it. Because Lila. And her stupidity. I HATE STUPID PROTAGONISTS SO MUCH

[Sam Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really powerful and well-written book that addresses the grief that follows after a parent commits suicide. At a summer camp that sixteen-year-old Lila did NOT want to attend, specifically for kids who've experienced a death of a family member, Lila learns to let herself love and trust again, as she writes and rewrites rules for herself in her Half-Orphan's Handbook. Putting in the work of healing and forgiving is terrifying when she'd rather spend her summer reading alone in her room... but as Lila learns, "life keeps going on," and she must learn to do the same. An excellent book, especially for anyone grappling with grief.

[Caro · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you to Imprint/Macmillan, Xpresso Book Tour, and Netgalley for providing me with a digital Arc in exchange for an honest review! All quotes are taken from the Arc and therefore subject to changes.

IMPRESSIONS

Grief was explored in many different ways. Of course, Lila's own experience - which is drawn from the author's own background - is front and center. She deals with the mix of emotions after losing her dad to suicide and feeling like her life is falling apart around her. There is some stigma, anger and hurt involved for her, as Lila has problems comprehending how she didn't see this coming and why her dad would leave her behind. She's on a desperate search for answers in order to be able to move on with her life even a bit, as now it seems impossible. That makes The Half-Orphan's Handbook such a raw and emotional book as you experience all these intense emotions alongside Lila. Through the grief camp we get to see other experiences as well though!

The idea of the Grief Camp was great. It's a 8 week long camp for any kids who have lost someone in their immediate family, and initially Lila has no intention of going. She doesn't get the point of it or trying out therapy. However, she cannot help but slowly see the merits of being around people who understand her. There is group therapy and many typical summer activities like kayaking, making S'mores or art offered for the campers in order to help them deal with their loss. I really like the setting of the camp, as it has some summer vibes but also emotional moments, as the children are still grieving, though they are also having fun moments. I like how mental health was explored in this setting!

There were so many fantastic Friendships! ❤ Lila has trouble connecting with her friends at home, as they don't know how to deal with her loss. However, at the grief camp, she meets many people like her, who know exactly what it feels like to lose someone. That opens up a whole world of understanding for her and allows Lila to finally feel like someone gets her. Though she initially tries to not get attached to anyone - fearing she will lose them - she cannot help but find friends. I really liked the cast of secondary characters and their experience with grief. Winnie was probably my favorite, as she's super friendly, open and easy-going, immediately trying to put Lila at ease and include her at camp. She's also her bunkmate, alongside with Madison, who is a bit more distant. At first it seems like she's your typical Mean Girl, but it turns out that Madison has been through a lot and misplaced a lot of anger on Lila. Later, she opens up as well and the three of them have such a great connection! I also liked Deese, one of the boys at camp who develops such a wonderful friendship with Lila and helps her pick up sports again, which she kind of quit after losing her father. I also have the mention Jeff, the organizer of the grief camp, as he tried his best to help the kids confront their own feelings and enable them to move on. He's knows what grief is like and his dedication to camp was beautiful to see!

"The moment you realize you don't have control over what anyone else does is the moment you find yourself comfortable with your world."

I wish I had been able to connect a bit more to the story though. I liked Lila, but I didn't 100% connect to her emotionally. She was often hard on the people around her, even though many of them had gone through a similar experience and held them to such high standards. That got me frustrated at times, as her mistakes were often easily forgiven while Lila wasn't as forgiving herself. I also felt like the romance developed way too quickly and didn't give me much time to root for Lila and Noah. We barely got to know him before they suddenly liked each other. I was missing the chemistry and emotional connection between them as their attraction felt rushed and not as fleshed out, as it could have been.

"I'd never been good with lasts. The last day of school, the last hurdling meet of the season - every time I knew I was experiencing a last, everything about it would feel much more poignant and significant."

IN CONCLUSION. ➽ The Half-Orphan's Handbook is a heartfelt book exploring the grief of losing a parent to suicide and the question of how to move on with life with such a gaping hole in your heart. I liked the idea of a grief summer camp, as it brought the main character in contact with other kids that had gone through a similar experience and forged many strong friendships. If you like emotional, but hopeful books, this is perfect for you!

INFORMATION
➽ CW's: Grief, Discussions of Death, Addiction & Mental Health
➽ Representation 🌷 Grief

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[Jen · Rating 3 out of 5]

I normally can relate to YA books but this one is a lil different. The story is interesting, it tackles grief and strong emotions of a young lady who lose her dad on suicide and got sent on a camp whos participants went through the same thing. I mean, I am pro moving on, but for a story who have a powerful message to sends about grief and moving on, this one seems to focus on Lila and her romance. It felt a bit off. but anyway, it is still a good read, it have so many wonderful points.

[Brianna Bourne · Rating 5 out of 5]

This story was absolutely lovely! Joan Smith tackles a heavy topic with humor, hope, and sweetness. The tone is great for both lower and upper ranges of YA—it never gets too dark to handle. I loved the large cast of characters, the summer camp setting, the sex-positive romance, and the diverse rep. A fresh, touching, and uplifting read!

[Anuradha Rajurkar · Rating 5 out of 5]

I began this yesterday, and am already engrossed! Review to come...

[Aaron · Rating 3 out of 5]

Lila's anger is pinched and muted, but she feels it just as severely as any other window of betrayal might suggest. Lila's anger is also extraordinarily public, yet she mutters on the rigor of enduring its consequences no less than were she pondering the musings of the dead, wrongly presuming understanding brings clarity.

But what does Lila Cunningham know? She's 16, a mediocre student, and headed for a summer camp for emotionally fragile kids. Sounds rough. THE HALF-ORPHAN'S HANDBOOK sets its sights on Lila, grieving from her father's recent suicide, as well as the connections she makes in a forested summer getaway somewhere in Maine, U.S. The girl doesn't want to go. She wants to sit in bed. Stew. Hate the world. And hope against hope her mother finally breaks and tells her why her father hung himself.

Clarity does not come easy. Alas, grief takes on many different colors, speaks in many different tones, and accumulates any number of different textures that overwhelm the senses and fracture a wounded or unguarded mind. And in THE HALF-ORPHAN'S HANDBOOK, Lila learns to adapt and run alongside her grief, rather than to fight it, constantly, daily, grinding herself into nothing, for nothing.

This book holds close to its heart dependable character voices/perspectives, a relatable emotional prerogative, and a heightened sensitivity to the consequences of existing in a world too full of bad things happening to somewhat decent people.

For example, the different characters Lila meets at a camp designed for teenagers who all have recently suffered loss includes a raucous mix of the depressed, the anxious, the pragmatic, and the petulant. Lila gets along with about half of the other unfortunate attendees to this "summer camp for sad kids." Many of these relationships are what drive the story forward, and if not for the pathetic and theatrical use of YA fiction's dreaded (inevitable) brooding male counterpart, the book may well have steadfastly succeeded on the merits of those character dynamics alone (e.g., Why are so many of these kids so wealthy?). Aside from the pretty boy with "bold eyebrows and blue eyes," the cast is solid. Madison is smart and engaging, but she's interminably sour. Is her suffering any more solemn than anyone else's? CP is younger than most and tags along with anyone who will let him. Is his suffering any more, or less, than others, for how little he externalizes it?

Thematically, the novel partly favors the awkward permissiveness favored by an underdeveloped or adolescent perspective of grief. That is to say, looking past the causal implications of a bad thing and instead generalizing the circumstances as crudely designed happenstance. The journey from ignorant child to contemplative young adult is stilted with affectations, but alas, the protagonist stumbles through the muck of grief with new friends, an overabundance of therapy, and a random first love. Perhaps the result is not unexpected. Lila's Moleskine handbook, in which she jots down a few home-made "rules" for socializing following her father's death, chronicles this messy mental journey: love leads to hurt; life continues in spite of pain and suffering; people can surprise you; and anger can be healthy, if focused.

At which point, THE HALF-ORPHAN'S HANDBOOK wields the cudgel of mental health awareness rather heavily. Lila must learn to center herself, control her anger, and adapt to a range of emotional vulnerability she never knew she needed to master — a not unreasonable assessment. But the novel gets crassly prosaic by its closing chapters. Not in a narrative or linguistic manner, but in thematic terms. The book's characters, particularly Lila, linger too heavily on the unearned forgiveness of the gone or departed, which, however emotionally validating, gravely broaches the dictum of accountability. It's strange. Lila's father was secretive, selfish, compulsive, and greedy, but these fixations are blithely sundered because her father was also, apparently, a victim of his own mind. Lila later claims she can adequately differentiate between the neurotic wickedness of "hiding actions that were wrong" and the enlightened forgiveness bestowed in the wake of wrongdoing, but the book clearly shows her sentiments leaning toward excusing bad, selfish, or compulsive behavior instead of simply weeding it out.

[Hannah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was marking in the margins each time this story made me cry, but it got to be so much that I was consistently teary the entire second half of the book. But this book isn’t just sad. It’s sad — it is, in the way a book about children grieving dead parents and loved ones would be — but it’s also hopeful and inspiring and so, so funny. I was crying one minute, laughing out loud the next. My partner kept looking at me with one eyebrow raised like, “U OK?”

Lila is a character I can see myself in despite not having experienced the death of my father. She’s witty, sharp, motivated, moody. She shells-up to protect herself from further harm, and she doesn’t shell-up in the way that a lot of people do — in a deep, unknowing, drowning kind of way. She does is consciously. Logically. Like a Virgo (is she a Virgo?). She develops a plan and opens this notebook and makes a list like a nerdy little future writer that I love and want to hug close to my heart. And we see her constantly struggle between desperately trying to stick to her own rules and also not being able to help but enjoy the small beauties that life has to offer us in our times of grief - new friendships with people who get it just a little bit more than others, parents who forgive us when we say the shittiest things to them, art made from scraps, a surprising crush, and adults who care enough to not let us get away with our own teenage bullshit.

This book is such a love letter to professional mental health help. As someone who has experienced suicidal thoughts and has battled the internal judgment and external stigmas of needing that treatment just to function in everyday life, I am so grateful that this book exists. I wish it had existed when I was a teenager. I wish there were more stories that were able to send this message without making the entire story read like a pamphlet you’d see in your guidance counselor’s office. Stories whose messages just seep into you as you’re reading because they’re that good. I also tend to be super critical of books that display mental health professionals because I always feel like I am constantly thinking, “no therapist would ever say that!” I did not have that problem with this book. I did wish we had gotten to see a little more of Jeff, but I understand why we didn’t. I enjoyed the pieces he was in, and I LOVED the concept of the snooze button. Obsessed with that.

Lastly, I loved the way the author weaves words together. There were a lot of sentences and paragraphs I underlined and highlighted to go back and marvel in. Some of my favorites:

“Past-perfect tense for an imperfect past.”

“We sat there for a long time, my family’s attendance rate holding steady at 75 percent.”

“My stomach was sour with emptiness.”

“My soul lives within Ariana Grande’s ponytail. That’s the most mythic ally alive thing I know.” (Literally LOL’ed.)

“Operation Gove Camp a Chance is now in session.” And later, “I’m piloting a new program of Jeff’s called Operation Give Camp a Chance.”

“Now, you really need to stop crying. Your perfect face looks weird with red eyes.”

“It’s not something you get over; it’s something you wade through. It just becomes one of your memories.”

“The hard and terrible truth I didn’t want to consider was that mental illness had been a part of my father he could no more scrape from his soul than I could the freckles from my face. It was a great fact—the big kind of great, not the good kind—that my father’s beautiful/awful double life was just a single one.”

Other things that I loved:
- Lila/Mom dynamic - So perfect
- The moment Lila finally “sent a message out” to her dad.
- Madison and Winnie hugging Lila in bed.
- Lila deciding to run the race, and asking Deese to do it with her.
- Sammy fixing Lila’s art project (wtf so unexpected!!!) <3
- The letter from Josie
- Lila asking Winnie & Madison to go to the race
- “Friends... and maybe?” “And maybe.”

Overall, just a lovely book. I hope to see more from this author very soon!

[Dai Guerra · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you to Netgalley and Macmillan Children's Publishg Group for the advanced copy of the book in exchange for my review.

TW: suicide mention, suicide, death, addiction

Thoughts and Themes: I knew this book would be heavy as I went into reading it just because of the subject matter that it tackles. Its hard for me to talk about this book without revealing too much personal information but this book hit close to home for a lot of reasons.

I liked how the book went through a lot of the feelings that come along with grief and how it explores guilt along with loss. I thought that this book really showed how guilt factors into grief quite well and did it in a way that was still sensitive to the manner.

This book felt healing for me and made me feel a lot less alone than I have felt in a while. I liked how the story points out that healing isn’t linear and how much work goes into it. I liked that we got to see each person deal with grief differently, and all ages deal with grief as well. I liked that we even have adults in this book that are dealing with grief and it is all different forms of grief.

I cried for a good while after reading this book and the author’s note, I also messaged the author to say thanks for this book which is something I never do because I’m too scared to do that. There are books that I relate to, books that make me feel seen, books that help me heal from things, but rarely does a book do all of those things. This book felt like it was sent to me to say “hey I got you” much like Lila gets these people at camp to make her feel that way.

Characters: Through this story we are introduced to multiple characters as they interact with our main character, Lila. We meet Lila’s brother, Sammy, Madison, Winnie, Noah, Deese and Jeff. I really liked all of the characters that we get to meet and loved all the relationships that are shown throughout this book.

While we do get a romance between Lila and Noah, I thought that was a side of the book and not the main portion of it. I liked how their romance developed and the emotions that LIla has to face to allow someone to be with her. I thought it was good to see her grapple with those feelings and struggle to let herself have feelings for someone. I think this really showed how much she was holding onto the past and not letting herself move forward with her life since her dad wasn’t there anymore.

I like how we get to see each character’s backstory and the reason for the way that they act towards others. I thought it was good to finally get Madison’s feelings out and the truth about Noah out as well. I liked how this was handled and how Lila is forced to see that she isn’t the only one dealing with a loss. There were times where Lila was annoying because of her attitude and the way she treated others but there was an understanding that each of them had their reasons.

Writing Style: This story is told in first person point of view through Lila’s perspective. I really enjoyed having the story be told by Lila as a narrator because you find things out just as she does. I thought it was great to be there with her as we find out details about her father and then find out things about Noah. I think that made the story a lot more impactful because you for a minute are Lila.

[Zoe · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book has such good intentions, and every now and then they actually manifest in honest discussions of the grief and confusion that comes after someone in your life dies, especially by taking their own life.

But there are more moments that are purely reprehensible. An experienced camp counselor at a camp for grieving children and teens guilt-trips the main character by telling her she's lucky to be at said camp because the girl whose place she took died, and also the counselor had to watch her sister die from cancer in their dining room and didn't get to go to camp afterwards, so Lila better be grateful and stop making such a fuss about going to the first week's welcome dance. And after the reveal about what makes Noah's past so tragic but in a different way from the other campers, Lila makes it all about herself, even though Noah never lied to her and nothing in his past has anything to do with her or them as a couple, proving that Noah was right to not to trust her with it. Also, apparently accidentally flaking on helping your friends organize a simple dodge ball tournament is a HUGE DEAL that warrants severe social repercussions, never mind that these same friends hazed Lila her first morning and that she'd already stuck with them through significantly more serious situations that didn't revolve around dodge ball.

I felt so obliged to like this book because it attempts to handle a truly difficult and life-altering situation that the author herself has gone through. But all the contrivances and pettiness had me rolling my eyes and wincing throughout. The characters' reactions are consistently way out of proportion to the "crimes" taking place, the details are inconsistent, often unnecessary, and sometimes mean-spirited (i.e., saying that an old man cheering runners in a race was "asinine"), and Smith has clearly forgotten what being a (pre)teen is actually like, so has made up idealized and stereotypical character traits and behaviors to stand in for that. "Liar" apparently means whatever Lila wants it to mean (never herself, even though she lies for days/weeks about her ability to swim), despite her taking every chance to show off her amazing vocabulary. As a final pet peeve, Smith's obsession with describing Lila's body and how much she hates it (poor girl is too skinny, but not actually, and she suffers from having curly hair), while adding in details like how she waxes her eyebrows and how ugly her brown eyes are compared to her mother's blue eyes, is so gross and pointless, especially in a book most likely to be read by teen girls.

Read Sarah Dessen's The Truth About Forever instead.

[Lindsay Clark · Rating 2 out of 5]

First, I’m glad someone wrote a book about grief camp. Grief camp is amazing, and talking about death and loss with young people is incredibly important. Unfortunately, this book gets a lot wrong about grief camp. Where are the adults? There appear to only be about 3 of them, and kids and teenagers basically do whatever they want totally unsupervised and unstructured all the time. This idea of camp feels like one you’d see on tv, but isn’t like real life camp OR real life grief camp.

One of the grief support groups includes three 16 year olds, a 13 year old, and an 8 year old. This just isn’t how that works, and it’s bizarre to think it would be appropriate for a young child to be in the same group as teens. There are twins who are named the inversely hyphenated names. The counselor doesn’t stay in the bunk with kids at night and is largely absent. To say nothing of the fact that one character is clearly hiding something that is blatantly foreshadowed the entire book… and that something turns out to be that he has (spoiler alert) *not actually had a death in his family*. That’s right, he’s at grief camp despite not having the one circumstance that qualifies you for grief camp, and the director knows and is in on this. This part was OUTRAGEOUS to me, and the characters in the story are nowhere near offended or angry enough about it.

I like that the author wanted to shed light on a difficult topic, and that she was inspired by a grief camp established post-9/11 in Maine, but as someone who has worked at a grief camp established post-9/11 in Maine, it didn’t scratch the surface of what that’s like, and was largely disappointing. There are so many amazing stories that could be shared about the experiences kids and teens have at grief camp, but this ended up being a predictable and surface-level teen romance that just happened to be set at a camp, rather than a deeper exploration of how supportive and healing spending a summer with other kids who have gone through the same difficult things you have could have been. I wanted this to ring true to my experience being part of a phenomenal and moving grief camp, and it just wasn’t.