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290 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 18, 2016



• Jamie was the only one Brynn let see her immediately post-bun, and he took a certain pride in this—even if he was here to take her to a party where she planned to kiss another guy.
• The tears came fast now, tears that tugged at his heart because he knew what they were for. He knew whom they were for: Spencer Matthews.
• “For you, Sleepy Jean, I’d give them both.” ... He was a goner. How he made it through this year without blurting out his feelings was a mystery, because when she looked at him like that, like he was the only one who could fix the mess that was her night, the words repeated over and over again in his head: I’m in love with you, B. But she’d made no secret of how she felt about Spencer Matthews since the school year started, which meant Jamie was well practiced in the fine art of holding it all in.
• Though who’s to say it wasn’t always there, this thing between [Jamie and Brynn]? Correction—this thing between them only Jamie seemed to feel. And who was he to stand in the way of her dream? He wouldn’t be that guy, letting his feelings interfere with her happiness. They had too much history for that kind of selfishness. Brynn made her choice, and it wasn’t Jamie. But tonight the universe seemed to be on his side, postponing the torture of watching her fall for someone else.


“You already messed with my heart once,” she admitted. “For a decade I’ve watched you go through relationship after relationship, and now that you finally realize I’m the one you want, you don’t even say anything? ... If I hadn’t gotten sick that night ten years ago... would you ever have told me how you felt? Or was it all bullshit?”
“Hey,” he interrupted, anger and pain warring in his tone. “That wasn’t bullshit. Jesus, Brynn. I watched you pine for Spencer for a year. You didn’t quite give me an opening to spill my heart. And then when you finally did, I was fucking terrified of losing you after I lost my goddamn family. I needed the one thing in my life that was stable, that wouldn’t change or pull the rug out from under me. And that was you…my best friend.”
“You’ve had almost two weeks to tell me how you felt, but instead you’re more worried about protecting yourself. You’re exactly the same guy you were ten years ago. You may be keeping yourself safe from getting hurt, Jamie, but all you’re doing is breaking my heart again. I thought I’d made you a cheater. I thought you’d made me a home wrecker. ... I get how scared you were then. I really do. But this is now. We’re adults, and I don’t want to play games anymore. What does it matter how we might feel if you can’t be honest with me?”




Brynn threw her hands in the air. She wasn’t sure if it was tears clouding her vision or just outright fury. “For you,” she said. “This will be easier for you, Jamie. But you didn’t think to ask what I want. You didn’t think to ask if I wanted to play along with your whole Brynn needs to make her choice scenario, either. You just decided for me because it’s what you want or need or whatever. You need proof about how I feel, right? Well, guess what, James? All you’ve been proving to me is that you’re just as good at pushing me away now as you were a decade ago. ... You’re unbelievable. ... So worried about your own damn heart you don’t think about what you’re doing to others. ... And just so we’re clear, by others I mean me. My heart, Jamie.”

... Brynn didn’t want to leave angry. ... He smiled, and her anger softened to a dull ache that tugged at her heart a little too much.


“It’s okay, B,” he said, his voice hoarse but at least able to articulate a few words. “I wanted you to be happy, either way. This was what I wanted, right? For you to figure this out. A heads-up you were staying with him would have been nice, but what’s done is done, isn’t it?”
We’re done, he thought and started backing away, but he couldn’t take his eyes off her. Not yet. Because as soon as he looked away, broke that last semblance of connection, they really would be done.


"I lied to myself - and to you - for a long time. But every day for eleven years, even when I wouldn't admit it, I've loved you."


“You know I’d give my left arm to make you feel better, right?”
She pressed her lips together and nodded. “It’s not that big of a sacrifice, considering you’re a righty. If you really cared—” She cut her own joke short to attempt a swallow, and it only made her cry more.
“For you, Sleepy Jean, I’d give them both.”
“You’re full of surprises today, Mr. Kingston.”
He took the flask from her, capped it, and tossed it back in the truck. “Maybe I’m just prepared,” he said when he was by her side again.
“Such a boy scout.”
He raised a brow.“Not sure they give badges for bringing alcohol on a road trip.”
“I don’t want to be the guy who stood in the way if there is someone who could make you happier than I could.”
“I wasn’t pretending, B.” He let out a long breath while Brynn seemed to hold hers. “I don’t know what that means, but if it means anything to you at all, please…tell me.”
“You’re perfect.”
“You’re beautiful.”
“I’m in love with you, and I just thought you should know.”
“The past ten years will always be between us if we don’t see this through. I don’t want to be the guy who stood in the way if there is someone who could make you happier than I could.That was the truth. She meant enough to him that her happiness came first.”
“And yes, it also still terrified him to love someone this much, with every ounce of himself, and know there was always a chance he could lose her. Nothing was certain. He understood that now. But he also understood that loving his best friend was worth all the risk, because trying not to love her? Well, that wasn’t an option anymore.”
When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.
"I'm still mad at you."
"As you should be."
"But it's a nice gesture. Very gentlemanly."
Love is always enough, because if you love someone then you fight to make it work.