It's Christmas Eve but Ben is not exactly in the festive spirit. He's unhappy at work, misses his mum and lately it feels as if he and his wife Daphne are just constantly bickering. Finding himself in a pub brooding over his sorrows with his best friend Harv, Ben finds himself seriously contemplating if his marriage is over, if Daphne would be better without him, and if she really is the one. Lately his thoughts have been turning to Alice, a girl at Uni that he once had a crush on before he met Daphne. What if all those years ago he had chosen Alice instead of Daphne, would things have turned out better? Yet when Ben is gifted an old watch by a strange watch-seller who bumps into him at the pub, his life takes a bizarre turn as he wakes up back in 2005 on the very evening he first met Daphne and chose her over Alice. Offered the chance to make the choice again, what will Ben do?
My first book by Tom Ellen, I thought this was an enjoyable and heart-warming read. It did take me a few chapters to get into, mainly because at the beginning Ben comes across as rather self-pitying. He's arranged to meet up with Alice in a few days time, and seems to be on the brink of embarking upon an affair, which doesn't paint him in the most endearing light at the story's start. However, then he meets this watch-seller and finds himself back in 2005. I wasn't sure at first the direction the story was going to take once Ben was in the past, would he drastically alter the course of his life by choosing Alice, was she really the one who got away and who he was destined to be with? It soon became apparent how the story was going to go though, and from that point on I loved this book. Some of the early scenes in the past when Ben is at Uni were particularly enjoyable just for the sense of nostalgia, and also the humour with characters like Marek.
The premise of the story is actually based on A Christmas Carol by Dickens, and whilst I am sure it is one that has been rehashed many times, I actually thought it worked really well here. I enjoyed the mix of time-travel and romance that the book offered, but more than anything I really enjoyed Ben's personal journey and growth as a character.
From not being too keen on him at the beginning, I actually really liked his character as the story went on. Yes, he has a tendency to be self-pitying and he can be selfish at times, however, he felt like a fully drawn out character, with flaws and all, and as a result it made him easy to identify with and very real. He tends to suffer from low self-esteem and has been colored in many ways by his parents' break up when he was very young, idolizing this image of the father he never sees but aspires to be like and yet also fears he might turn out like in some regards e.g an unfaithful husband, that can make him fearful of committing. His father is a famous play-wright and Ben too is an aspiring writer, yet his career has not panned out well and he is rather in a slump.
I enjoyed these family aspects to the book as I think our early lives and relationships and experiences often do play a huge role in shaping our characters, and yet as the story goes on, it is as if a light switches on for Ben and he gains this self-awareness that was quite inspiring, as he appreciates his own faults and that he doesn't have to be shaped by the legacy of his father, bur rather it is his own decisions that define him.
Another aspect of the time travel that I really enjoyed were the parts where Ben relives his past, and how his perception of what is going on changes the second time round, as he is so much more appreciative of the people around him, as opposed to being focused on himself and taking things for granted. He ends up not changing the big things, but rather smaller things, and he essentially falls in love with Daphne all over again, realizing how important she is to him.
I thought the parts with Ben and his mum were the most moving in the entire book, and the chapter where he just gets to be with her again on Christmas Eve as they play monopoly and just talk had me genuinely in tears, as that idea of getting extra time with someone you have lost is so poignant, and I thought Tom Ellen really rendered those scenes in a very touching way. In fact I found the entire way that he handled Ben's grief over his mum really well portrayed, in terms of the feelings of guilt and regret that linger and how it leads to him sort of withdraw into himself and turn away from the loved ones around him like Daphne who want to help him through it.
Daphne was a great character too, we are never really afforded her point of view, but I thought she was always really supportive of Ben, even when he could be difficult to be around, and the connection between them from the off was very genuine and easy.
I also liked Tom Ellen's portrayal of male friendships in how he rendered Ben and Harv's relationship. He highlighted how men often find it difficult to talk about the things that matter and rather just rely on banter.
As the book goes on, Ben sees a version of the present and future that could come into play depending on the choices he makes, before he finally finds himself back in the true present. I wasn't as keen on the portrayal of Alice, as I thought it was a bit one-dimensional and there just to serve a purpose.
Overall, this was a great book to escape into, with a blend of comedy, romance, a touch of magic and genuine heart. 4.5 stars