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Raising Up a Generation of Healthy Third Culture Kids: A Practical Guide to Preventive Care
If we could ensure that our TCKs would grow up healthy and resilient, we would do it in a heartbeat. In Raising up a Generation of Healthy Third Culture Kids, Lauren Wells has gifted us with a gentle guide and a preventive health primer, unique in the field of third culture kid literature. This book is a goldmine of wisdom, organized in a practical and readable format. While we cannot know all our TCKs will go through, we can take a giant step forward by learning how to multiply the benefits of a global life and conversely pay attention to the challenges that can become stumbling blocks to healthy development. If you are working with, raising, or love third culture kids from any part of the globe, this book will give you practical ways to be proactive about the way you raise up third culture kids.
215 pages, ebook
First published March 12, 2020
158 people are currently reading
458 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 50 reviews
December 10, 2024
Highly recommend. This book taught me much about what it is like to live in TCK shoes. Thinking about how their experience in a culture will most likely be different than their parents, how they may struggle to settle in adulthood, the internal timer they may subconsciously have with friendships, amongst many other things have opened my worldview and enriched my thought life.
May 1, 2020
As a third culture kid myself, who married a third culture kid and is raising three TCK's I found this book very practical! I got this book on our kindle and now I want to buy a physical copy. It is a book that I can go back to often for ideas and direction on how to help third culture kids.
Unknowingly as I was going to this resource mainly for my own children- it even helped ME work through some past grief I didn't even realize I was carrying. We work with many TCK's in our work and I could see using this book and recommending it to anyone living as expats.
Unknowingly as I was going to this resource mainly for my own children- it even helped ME work through some past grief I didn't even realize I was carrying. We work with many TCK's in our work and I could see using this book and recommending it to anyone living as expats.
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May 5, 2025Having the joy and privilege to be raising our family overseas, this book was immediately interesting to me when I heard about it. Years ago I had started reading another book along the same lines but put it down because - honestly - it was just depressing. While Lauren was clear about different unique challenges faced by TCKs, she was also clear about the way we can walk along side our children and help them. Some of her conversation questions I’ve already used with our oldest and have been great ways to start talking about life.
One thing she mentioned that I had never thought of was the way that kids who grow up overseas can feel like they don’t belong when they visit their passport country, in regards to such a difference of experience than their peers. I felt like even just having this on the radar to mention to the children before visits back will be super helpful with expectations etc.
Some parts felt repetitive and some parts felt maybe a little simplistic or over-generalized, but on the whole feel like this will be a book to come back to and have already recommended to other moms overseas. It will likely be one to recommend to some close family and friends before we visit to have them aware of ways to good advocates and understanding our children and how to best love and support them.
One thing she mentioned that I had never thought of was the way that kids who grow up overseas can feel like they don’t belong when they visit their passport country, in regards to such a difference of experience than their peers. I felt like even just having this on the radar to mention to the children before visits back will be super helpful with expectations etc.
Some parts felt repetitive and some parts felt maybe a little simplistic or over-generalized, but on the whole feel like this will be a book to come back to and have already recommended to other moms overseas. It will likely be one to recommend to some close family and friends before we visit to have them aware of ways to good advocates and understanding our children and how to best love and support them.
October 12, 2022
Lauren Wells does a great job of finding a balance between insightful information and practical advice. As a TCK myself, who wants to work with TCKs, I'm confident I will be coming back to this book again and again.
February 13, 2026
Hopeful, practical. Recommend.
October 23, 2020
If you are looking for a primer on how to proactively nurture the benefits and reduce the negative ramifications of growing up cross-culturally, this is the one. Author Lauren Wells speaks from personal and professional experience and has written this book to help parents and those who work with TCKs capitalize on the positives and minimize the negatives. The focus is on healthy TCKs who use their cross-cultural and transient upbringing to their advantage. To this end, she closes each chapter, as well as the entire book, by explaining specific traits that describe the capable, well-adjusted adults (ATCKs) that healthy Third Culture Kids can become.
Although there are several pages devoted to theory and abstract thinking surrounding the TCK life, Raising Up a Generation of Healthy Third Culture Kids is not so much a book of theory, but rather, a book of practice. Wells explains a few key elements to preventative care in chapter one:
1. Pre-Field Training
2. Educating Parents
3. Everyday CARE
a. Conversations
b. Awareness
c. Relationship
d. Example
Each chapter elaborates on specific issues and points parents back to the elements of the CARE model with specific examples of conversations to have or examples to live out. Some of those issues include unresolved grief, culture and language learning, leaving well, and more. I felt the issues explored were timely and practical. The first half of the book (roughly) more closely relates to younger TCKs, while the second half discusses issues related to older TCKs, like college and career.
Pros
One of the biggest selling points of this book is the example conversations, questions, exercises, worksheets, and object lessons provided by the author. Sometimes starting the conversation is the hardest part, and Lauren Wells makes sure parents can find the words to do so. There are even more resources on her website, www.tcktraining.com.
The book is full of truths and strategies that work well for ministry-minded families while not being overtly religious for those families who are involved in secular careers.
Cons
Several grammatical issues are distracting. I hope that a revised and expanded edition is released in coming years.
Although chapter eight provides an excellent toolbox for navigating cultural awareness and language learning, the two pages on schooling options is extremely limited. Thankfully there are other organizations that can help in this area.
Suggested Audience
Personally, I believe all parents of TCKs and all professionals who work with TCKs can benefit from this book and Lauren Wells’s additional materials. First and foremost, I recommend this book for parents who have not left their passport countries yet, so they can put these tools into practice from the very beginning. However, parents who working through transitions on the field can also benefit, whether that would be first having children on the field, sending their children to school for the first time, transitioning between fields, or sending their children to a college or university. Overall, I found this book both personally and professionally applicable, and I look forward to learning more from Lauren Wells. I wish I could give the book 4.75 stars!
Although there are several pages devoted to theory and abstract thinking surrounding the TCK life, Raising Up a Generation of Healthy Third Culture Kids is not so much a book of theory, but rather, a book of practice. Wells explains a few key elements to preventative care in chapter one:
1. Pre-Field Training
2. Educating Parents
3. Everyday CARE
a. Conversations
b. Awareness
c. Relationship
d. Example
Each chapter elaborates on specific issues and points parents back to the elements of the CARE model with specific examples of conversations to have or examples to live out. Some of those issues include unresolved grief, culture and language learning, leaving well, and more. I felt the issues explored were timely and practical. The first half of the book (roughly) more closely relates to younger TCKs, while the second half discusses issues related to older TCKs, like college and career.
Pros
One of the biggest selling points of this book is the example conversations, questions, exercises, worksheets, and object lessons provided by the author. Sometimes starting the conversation is the hardest part, and Lauren Wells makes sure parents can find the words to do so. There are even more resources on her website, www.tcktraining.com.
The book is full of truths and strategies that work well for ministry-minded families while not being overtly religious for those families who are involved in secular careers.
Cons
Several grammatical issues are distracting. I hope that a revised and expanded edition is released in coming years.
Although chapter eight provides an excellent toolbox for navigating cultural awareness and language learning, the two pages on schooling options is extremely limited. Thankfully there are other organizations that can help in this area.
Suggested Audience
Personally, I believe all parents of TCKs and all professionals who work with TCKs can benefit from this book and Lauren Wells’s additional materials. First and foremost, I recommend this book for parents who have not left their passport countries yet, so they can put these tools into practice from the very beginning. However, parents who working through transitions on the field can also benefit, whether that would be first having children on the field, sending their children to school for the first time, transitioning between fields, or sending their children to a college or university. Overall, I found this book both personally and professionally applicable, and I look forward to learning more from Lauren Wells. I wish I could give the book 4.75 stars!
July 16, 2022
This is an incredibly useful tool for parents of TCKs. It gives such practical ways to help your children navigate the grief and loss they are experiencing, that I see so many tremendous benefits. The main downsides I see are:
1. The book is American centric - which could alienate many readers
2. The repeated instances where the author directly saying to the reader that they are praying for them. Again, this Christian focus could alienate some readers.
1. The book is American centric - which could alienate many readers
2. The repeated instances where the author directly saying to the reader that they are praying for them. Again, this Christian focus could alienate some readers.
June 21, 2023
Essential reading if you are raising a third culture kid. This book has tons of practical advice on topics like special challenges for TCKs, how to leave a place well, and how to wrestle with restlessness.
June 8, 2022
As a TCK myself and also one who has raised TCKs, I’m grateful Lauren has finally given us a manual with practical suggestions and tips that parents can implement today to help raise healthy kids able to integrate the various cultures they are privileged to be part of.
September 12, 2024
Super practical and helpful. Written by a TCK.
May 17, 2022
Practical Help
Insightful and helpful… this book is packed with practical ways to help TCKs figure out who they are, and learn to be emotionally healthy in turn. Excellent book!
Insightful and helpful… this book is packed with practical ways to help TCKs figure out who they are, and learn to be emotionally healthy in turn. Excellent book!
September 29, 2021
Overall, this book provides immensely practical advice on how to raise kids in another culture. The author is a TCK herself and gives lots of insight as to what that is like. I gave it 4 stars because I felt like it was a bit one-sided “all TCK’s will experience x, y, and z…” I also felt like it’s a bit fear-inducing: do this one wrong thing as a parent and you won’t know it until your child is an adult but, they’ll be ruined for life.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m still going to recommend to my friends who move overseas. Just with the caveat that no matter how we raise our kids, they are going to need therapy. Period. So less perfection, more grace.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m still going to recommend to my friends who move overseas. Just with the caveat that no matter how we raise our kids, they are going to need therapy. Period. So less perfection, more grace.
March 12, 2025
Highly recommend! This book was an overview of the TCK life. It gave practical ways to help them develop and to teach them to cope well. It was a quick, accessible read and I learned a lot.
January 16, 2023
This book takes an honest look at the challenges TCKs face and gives parents practical guidance on navigating them. It is hopeful but realistic. Instead of feeling like: what have we done!? I kept thinking Ok, Ok this is not going to be easy but we can do this. Must read for parents raising kids outside their passport culture for any amount of time.
April 3, 2024
Highly practical! I'm sure I'll be referencing this book for a long time.
June 9, 2022
Great practical advice for anyone raising kids overseas!
February 17, 2021
This TCK parenting book takes a proactive approach to raising children, looking at how early childhood experiences and the emotional health of the parents contribute to raising healthy kids. Lauren Wells emphasizes the very real effects that childhood experiences, especially trauma, exert in adult health.
This book is also very practical. It will teach parents how to address trauma in the moment so that the grief doesn't pile up and have lasting effects. Different talking points, activities and conversation starters are given for children of different ages so that you have the tools you need to address issues or proactively build resilience throughout your child's whole growing up.
If I had a complaint about this book it would be that she can focus on one segment of TCK tendencies and ignore the others. For example, she focuses heavily on the "chameleon" nature of TCKs to blend in, and less on "screamers" who refuse to conform or "wallflowers" who try to disappear during transitions. As a screamer myself, I felt rather underrepresented. She also focuses on MKs who get the itch to move every few years but I know many MKs who didn't experience this at all. For some, they attach themselves to the first place they can settle into and never want to leave again. These TCKs may need a different kind of help.
Overall, this is an excellent book for parents, especially those parents of young TCKs who wish to build a solid foundation for their kids' emotional health. It's rather comprehensive without dragging itself out. Highly recommend.
This book is also very practical. It will teach parents how to address trauma in the moment so that the grief doesn't pile up and have lasting effects. Different talking points, activities and conversation starters are given for children of different ages so that you have the tools you need to address issues or proactively build resilience throughout your child's whole growing up.
If I had a complaint about this book it would be that she can focus on one segment of TCK tendencies and ignore the others. For example, she focuses heavily on the "chameleon" nature of TCKs to blend in, and less on "screamers" who refuse to conform or "wallflowers" who try to disappear during transitions. As a screamer myself, I felt rather underrepresented. She also focuses on MKs who get the itch to move every few years but I know many MKs who didn't experience this at all. For some, they attach themselves to the first place they can settle into and never want to leave again. These TCKs may need a different kind of help.
Overall, this is an excellent book for parents, especially those parents of young TCKs who wish to build a solid foundation for their kids' emotional health. It's rather comprehensive without dragging itself out. Highly recommend.
June 18, 2024
I read this book while our family is living abroad (from the US) in Colombia (to learn Spanish and experience another culture, travel, etc), and read it with other expat moms doing the same.
I might be more inclined to give it 3-3.5, because it’s a little repetitive and feels somewhat biased/slanted towards her specific type of Third Culture Kid experience, but I went with 4 because I do think it’s a valuable book to read if you’re raising TKCs. It’s very readable, moves fast, and has clear structure and a format that enables easy application. If you’re in the buckets of families who are working for NGos, state dept, missionaries, etc, I think it might be even more applicable than the situation all of us were/are in- choosing to live overseas for language, culture, travel etc. Still many applicable parts, but not perhaps exactly the target audience.
Many times I also thought, well, this is just good parenting wisdom in general, wherever you live (ie if I was just in my home country raising children, I’d want to have good open communication, teach about a range of emotions, foster deep relationships, teach how to grieve well etc). But, still helpful to apply general parenting wisdom to the expat life and lifestyle.
It could have been shortened/edited down by 25% and still maintained all the points, but it wasn’t overly onerous or long, so this can be forgiven.
Overall, it helped me think about a number of aspects of our chosen life in new ways and promoted me to continue working to maximize the benefits of TKC life and minimize the potential pitfalls.
I might be more inclined to give it 3-3.5, because it’s a little repetitive and feels somewhat biased/slanted towards her specific type of Third Culture Kid experience, but I went with 4 because I do think it’s a valuable book to read if you’re raising TKCs. It’s very readable, moves fast, and has clear structure and a format that enables easy application. If you’re in the buckets of families who are working for NGos, state dept, missionaries, etc, I think it might be even more applicable than the situation all of us were/are in- choosing to live overseas for language, culture, travel etc. Still many applicable parts, but not perhaps exactly the target audience.
Many times I also thought, well, this is just good parenting wisdom in general, wherever you live (ie if I was just in my home country raising children, I’d want to have good open communication, teach about a range of emotions, foster deep relationships, teach how to grieve well etc). But, still helpful to apply general parenting wisdom to the expat life and lifestyle.
It could have been shortened/edited down by 25% and still maintained all the points, but it wasn’t overly onerous or long, so this can be forgiven.
Overall, it helped me think about a number of aspects of our chosen life in new ways and promoted me to continue working to maximize the benefits of TKC life and minimize the potential pitfalls.
November 29, 2021
This book is a really insightful look into both the strengths and challenges of TCKs, kids who grow up outside their passport country and neither fully part of their parents’ culture or fully part of the place they live either. It’s especially helpful if you aren’t a TCK yourself but are raising kids outside your passport country. There are both struggles and opportunities unique to this group of kids, and the author of this book has first-hand experience both as a TCK and in doing workshops for TCKs.
There were lots of useful suggestions, and I think I’ll definitely re-read this one as well as look at some of the other resources she mentions.
There were lots of useful suggestions, and I think I’ll definitely re-read this one as well as look at some of the other resources she mentions.
January 31, 2026
When I started this book, I expected to take away a lot of ideas of what to do to support my own kids who are growing up as TCKs. What I didn’t expect was how often I would find myself in these pages. I grew up as a military kid, adapting with each move and making friends pretty easily. But also struggling with restlessness and a lack of deep friendships. Lauren Wells spoke to my heart in ways I wasn’t expecting. I’m thankful for her vulnerability and practical suggestions and questions. I don’t normally dog-ear books, but this one has been dog-eared so I can easily refer to Lauren’s questions again and again.
April 28, 2024
The author set out to provide a set of tools for parents of “Third Culture Kids” and it was beyond such a job well done. This was my introduction to TCKs and felt it was a solid blend of educational information followed up with great actionable items supporting the information described. Reading this also struck me several times throughout the book after realizing that I am a cross cultural kid. What my childhood would have been like had my parents had the emotion intelligence and awareness this book taps into so well.
October 30, 2025
I rated this book as I did in part because I listened to the audio version and it was voiced by AI. I didn’t realize that before I purchased the book either. (I also have a small child so audiobooks are just easier in this phase of life).
It was horrible to listen to and totally took away from the quality of content and my ability to actually listen well. The way the voice said “tck” was wrong almost every time. I will say the author did have some good points that I appreciated I just struggled to get past the voice narrating the book.
It was horrible to listen to and totally took away from the quality of content and my ability to actually listen well. The way the voice said “tck” was wrong almost every time. I will say the author did have some good points that I appreciated I just struggled to get past the voice narrating the book.
June 10, 2021
Super practical and helpful - I loved this book! Growing up as a semi-TCK, I felt this gave words to experiences/feelings that I didn't previously know how to express. I appreciate the preventative advice - actions and conversations - to help our kids navigate their life as TCK's. I highly recommend this for those who are raising TCKs! And if you are an adult TCK (especially young adults), you might find this validating and helpful as well!
May 10, 2024
This book has some good practical ideas, but as a parent of TCKs, there is also so much stress. Maybe I’ve just reached my fill of this kind of book, but it seems like if you don’t do this long list of things right, you’re gonna screw up your kids. And living cross culturally and really just life is hard enough without so much added pressure and anxiety inducing warnings. I can hopefully take the helpful ideas and insights without carrying too much of the fear.
May 1, 2020
This book lives up to its name. I am interested in reading and learning about third culture kids (TCKs) for my own future, so preventive care is just what I need to learn about in this stage of my life! This is an excellent, practical book. Just the right length at around 200 pages--enough details and examples to really be useful, but short enough to be practical. Definitely recommended.
March 21, 2022
This is the easily accessible TCK handbook for parents that I hoped it would be. It is an easy read, relatable and focuses on preventative care with a healthy dose of positive benefits. This is a great "first" TCK read for people to then get into more in depth research in any areas that their kids might need extra focus.
January 12, 2024
Another top-quality resource for parents and caregivers of TCKs! I really loved all the practical, specific advice and tools Lauren provides for how to raise up healthy TCKs--not just the why and what.
Definitely one I plan on reading again someday when I have my own kids (whom I hope to raise as TCKs).
Definitely one I plan on reading again someday when I have my own kids (whom I hope to raise as TCKs).
February 25, 2024
|| 4.5 ⭐️ ||
This is an excellent resource for parents/loved ones of TCKs! It’s a much shorter and more concise read than “Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds” by David C. Pollock & Ruth Van Reken, yet I felt that it covered everything it really needed to regarding helping TCKs navigate the transient lifestyle, whether that be before, during and after each move or transition.
This is an excellent resource for parents/loved ones of TCKs! It’s a much shorter and more concise read than “Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds” by David C. Pollock & Ruth Van Reken, yet I felt that it covered everything it really needed to regarding helping TCKs navigate the transient lifestyle, whether that be before, during and after each move or transition.
November 25, 2025
Lauren Wells uses her own experiences as a third culture kid to help parents, families and agencies recognize the potential and uncommon traits of children raised cross culturally. This book isn't a manual for raising kids, but it provides great categories and insights to help children and families prepare and process the unique strains children feel when living cross culturally.
March 30, 2021
I wish I would have read this before moving overseas with two toddlers in tow. Now I have 4 TCKs and I found the practical help in this book necessary and refreshing. I can see that it will continue to be helpful as my children move into middle school, high school, and beyond.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 50 reviews