Comfort for the Grieving Parent's Heart: Hope and Healing After Losing Your Child

by Gary Roe

The unthinkable has happened. You've lost a child.

How are you going to survive this?

The world around you speeds on as if nothing happened. Stunned, shocked, sad, confused, and angry, you blink in disbelief. Your heart is crushed. The pain is excruciating. You can barely breathe.

For you, everything has changed. Everything.

What do you do? What can you do?

Multiple award-winning author, hospice chaplain, and grief counselor Gary Roe is a trusted voice who has been helping wounded, grieving parents and grandparents find hope and healing for more than three decades. Written with heartfelt compassion, this warm, easy-to-read, and practical book reads like a caring conversation with a close friend.

Comfort for the Grieving Parent's Heart will meet you in your grief and walk with you there. Your shattered heart will resonate with these pages. Composed of brief chapters, you will find yourself digesting bite-sized bits of comfort, encouragement, and healing over time. This book will become a comforting, refreshing companion as you navigate the turbulent waters of intense grief.

In Comfort for the Grieving Parent's Heart, you will discover how to...
- Process all those complicated, roller coaster emotions (sadness, anger, guilt, fear, confusion, guilt, anxiety, depression, feeling overwhelmed, etc).
- Navigate all the relational changes and frustrations that occur, including feeling alone, misunderstood, isolated, and even rejected by those around you.
- Handle the ever-increasing stress load that keeps piling upon you.
- Deal with disturbing physical and mental health issues, illnesses, and new symptoms that often arise.
- Honor your child by taking care of yourself through diet, hydration, fitness, and rest.
- Deal with your daunting list unrelenting, ongoing responsibilities (work, financial challenges, parenting, family activities, etc.).
- Handle the intense loneliness that now resides in your heart and soul.

You will also find hope in how to...
- Think through tough, challenging spiritual and faith questions.
- Relate well to the people around you - both those who are helpful, and those who aren't.
- Overcome the tendency to run from emotional pain with unhealthy habits or compulsive behaviors.
- Deal well with triggers and grief bursts.
- Find the support you need for survival, recovery, and healing (safe people, fellow grievers, counseling, etc.).
- Develop a simple, realistic plan for birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays.
- Use your grief for good - for yourself, your family, and others. 
- Allow this devastating loss to give you greater perspective and motivate you to live more effectively than ever before.
- Honor your child and make your life count, one day, one moment at a time.

Please don’t grieve alone. Be kind to yourself. Take your heart seriously. 

Let Comfort for the Grieving Parent's Heart join you on this confusing, arduous, and exhausting journey. You will be glad you did.

Read on. Comfort awaits you in these pages of this book.

280 pages, Kindle Edition

Published April 7, 2020

About the author

Hi. My name is Gary.

My story began with a childhood of sexual abuse and numerous other losses. When my life began to unravel as a teen, another family took me in and changed the trajectory of my life. My healing journey began.

Eager to help others heal and grow, my heart turned outward. Over the next three decades, I served as a campus minister, a church-planting missionary in Japan, an entrepreneur in Hawaii, and a pastor. I'm currently work as a writer, speaker, and hospice chaplain.

After walking through deep valleys with thousands of people, I can say the following with confidence:

• We've all been wounded
• Healing isn't for sissies
• We’re all designed for impact
• The world needs us
• We must heal

I'm here to help. I'm no guru or master of anything. I'm a fellow struggler. I still bear the scars of my wounds. I grieve, get anxious, worry, and battle fear regularly. But I'm healing, and I'm growing.

Stop by my website. Drop me an email. I’d love to hear from you.

Reviews

[Maureen McRae · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved this book and the way the chapters were set up. For a newly grieving Mom, I have a hard time concentrating sometimes and my mind wanders, but I felt like I could read each chapter and affirmation at the end and nod my head in agreement.

[Colleen Smock · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a must read and a must be read more than once on your journey to help and healing and surviving the unthinkable loss of a child. I have been suffering the loss of our beautiful Misty for 15 years now. And for the first time during that time frame, thanks to this book, I feel like I have the tools to make a new normal from the most tragic event in my life. The Author literally takes you by the hand shows you the path to recovery through self care and that it’s ok, even essential to feel hope and optimism. I am truly grateful for the guidance and compassion contained on the pages of this book and the wonderful message within. Gary, I can’t begin to ThankYou enough, for the words from your heart.

[Lynne Love · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a good resource for grieving parents, but it is written in a very redundant manner. Re-stating the author’s words in a slightly different manner became monotonous. However, clear affirmations are summarized at the end of each chapter making it easy to read or even skim for someone who is deep in grief. I cried hard while reading some chapters, skipped over others that did not pertain to me, and felt comforted by the end. It was a relief to understand that grief is a process, that my grief outbursts will ebb and flow and that my tears are a way of honoring my child and remembering him.

[Mary Beth · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book provides peace and understanding when you face the unfathomable loss of a child.

We lost our son at 28 years old a little over a year ago. Finding someone who will just listen and comfort you, not try to fix it, is such a blessing, and this book DOES that. Written 2-3 page sections, as a grieving parent, you can read what you need to read on any particular day and find understanding, a sense you are not alone, and healthy ways to move forward in what will be a lifelong journey of healing your broken heart.

[Tracey Ross · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you Gary Roe for writing Comfort for the Grieving Parent’s Heart. Every page was written with love, comfort, encouragement and hope for parents who have suffered the loss of a child. Each chapter captured the emotional roller coaster I’ve experienced during this ten year separation from my son due to his tragic passing at the age of 25. I felt like you personally sat down with me, listened to every word I spoke, as well as those that I couldn’t, and provided comfort and encouragement. Tracey R.

[Marie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gary Roe’s book Caring for Grieving Parent’s Heart gently guides the reader through the chaos and confusion of losing a child in a personal and meaningful way. Gary writes with empathy and compassion. His short simple to read chapters are encouraging and the affirmations at the end of each chapter are comforting. The experiences and emotions he shares from parents who have lost a child assure me that I am not alone in this dark journey. I highly recommend this book to any parent who is grieving a lost child. This is a book I will keep as a reference and read again as needed.

[Sara J · Rating 5 out of 5]

As parents travel the uncharted and unpredictable waters of grief, Gary Roe’s beautiful new book Comfort for the Grieving Parents Heart: Hope and Healing After Losing Your Child speaks lovingly and boldly to the many complex emotions and issues that emerge needing to be acknowledged, questioned, embraced, or released with the greater awareness that flows from each chapter. I have been on this journey as a mom, so impacted by grief…and wish this insightful book had been one of my traveling companions.

[Susan C. Beabout · Rating 5 out of 5]

SUPER SUPPORTIVE AND HELPS VALIDATE AND HONOR YOUR CHILD IN THIS DEVASTATING LOSS!
Comfort for the Grieving Parents' Heart provides validation to the tremendous, gripping emotions following loss of your child. There is no doubt that losing your child is about as difficult as loss can be! This book gives help on what to do with those emotions, physical, mental and spiritual anguish that you are experiencing!

[Rosemary Rhodes · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gary Roe never disappoints and this book is no exception. Only one who has experienced deep grief could write this so that those who are grieving can actually feel like he is inside their heads saying the thoughts they are thinking.
This is a book you can return to again and again and find something new each time. I think this book can also speak to the friends and loved ones who are coming alongside the grieved to aid in how they can help. Thank you Gary Roe for this helpful book.

[Karen B · Rating 1 out of 5]

As a newly bereaved mother, I found this book to be a new means of torture during an already torturous time. Affirmations that say things like “I have failed my child”? It’s almost the author wants us to punish ourselves even more than we already are.
I would donate it somewhere, but I’m afraid it may hurt someone else so I don’t even know what to do with it. I guess a lot of people find it helpful, but I definitely did not.

[Donna Green- Padden · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was so well written, I could have wrote it myself.  It describes my life, my feelings, my "new normal" since losing my son.  We all have these emotions and it really is very reassuring that we are not alone and that everything we are feeling is just like other parents that have lost a child.  Hugs to all our grieving hearts.  James's mom forever 25 :(

[Kathy Smith]

This book covers all the feelings that I had after the death of my son and sometimes still have five years later. I like the format. The chapters are short so that you can read as a daily reading or an uplifting few minutes if you don't have much time. Gary Roe knows how to love others and the love shines through in this book.

[Stacey Lingafelt · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book rang true for me with the thoughts and feelings I experienced through my grief journey. I like how he writes from the grievers perspective and then gives guidance and affirmations from a counselors view point. I highly recommend Comfort For The Grieving Parents Heart to anyone who has lost a child and those who want to support them.

[Donna Dwyer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gary Roe understands grief. He described my feelings especially early grief exactly how it felt. The mass of confusing emotions. The book offers things to do to understand and look at your feelings plus things to do to help you work through them. A must read for parents who have lost a child.

[Dee · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is wonderful! I would highly recommend it to anyone going through the loss of a child. Losing a child is such a terrible loss. This book offers wonderful information & hope through the grief.

[Martha Laufer · Rating 5 out of 5]

What I read is SO exactly how my early grief felt, it’s uncanny. Like Gary was listening in to my thoughts 4 years ago when my son died. That doesn’t make me feel uncomfortable, I feel known, understood, validated and comforted.

[Annette Aaron · Rating 5 out of 5]

This has to one of the best books yet! I highly recommend you get this! Mr. Roe’s books has been my backbone for 6 years! I could not have made these past few years without him! Buy his books. You will keep referring to them all the time. Words of understanding and encouragement!

[Christine Collier]

Definitely a must read to those who have loss a child AND those who want to understand what they are going through to help them while they go through he rest of their lives in their new normals.

[Michael McAnelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's hard to find comfort when grieving, but this book is definitely good for that. It provides information that is easy to relate to as if you wrote it. This a must read for any grieving parent.

[Brenda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Must read for anyone that has lost a child. It has helped me to realize that I'm not alone or going crazy. All the things that we are experiencing are normal.

[Jamey · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book validated my feelings as a grieving mother. I examined emotions that grief delivers such as anger, confusion, fear and loneliness. The grief affirmations which follow each chapter were teaching moments for me as I attempt to move forward in life without my young, adult son. This book illuminates a path for many who are walking through the darkness of grief without our children.

[Joyce Schwartz · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoyed reading this book. It has helped me to understand the feelings I felt after my son died that I ignored after both of my parents passed.