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If I Could Tell You How It Feels: my life journey with PTSD
If I Could Tell You How It Feels is a series of essays and poems about living authentically with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Alexis Rose takes us on a journey into the reality of living with triggers, flashbacks, and the challenges of working through trauma. She writes with intimate vulnerability about the tough subjects of family, friendships, loss, grief, parenting, and therapy.
With a sense of universal hope and honesty, the author collaborated with artist Janet Rosauer to add a dramatic and soulful dimension to many of the chapters.
Whether you are a survivor, someone living with a mental or chronic illness, a professional working within the mental health industry, or you are simply interested in learning more about the intricacies of living and thriving with PTSD, this book will provide new insights and an appreciation of this invisible illness that affects millions of people around the world.
Alexis Rose takes us on a journey into the reality of living with triggers, flashbacks, and the challenges of working through trauma. She writes with intimate vulnerability about the tough subjects of family, friendships, loss, grief, parenting, and therapy.
With a sense of universal hope and honesty, the author collaborated with artist Janet Rosauer to add a dramatic and soulful dimension to many of the chapters.
Whether you are a survivor, someone living with a mental or chronic illness, a professional working within the mental health industry, or you are simply interested in learning more about the intricacies of living and thriving with PTSD, this book will provide new insights and an appreciation of this invisible illness that affects millions of people around the world.
120 pages, Paperback
Published January 24, 2018
12 people are currently reading
18 people want to read
About the author
Alexis Rose
37 books15 followersAlexis Rose began her remarkable healing journey in 2009. Sparked by a family tragedy she began to piece together, for the first time, a personal history of abuse and trauma. Supported by her spirituality and writing, as well as family and friends, she has profoundly grown and changed over the years.
While learning to live with the effects of her trauma, and working with the deficits caused by PTSD (Post-traumatic Stress Disorder), she has co-authored three inspirational books. Her memoir, Untangled, speaks to the courage, resilience, and triumph over her unimaginable hardship. Her newest book, If I Could Tell You How It Feels is a series of essays and poems about living authentically with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Alexis is an experienced speaker on the topics of living with Post-traumatic Stress Disorder. She is also an active blogger who writes about PTSD, Mental Health, and Trauma, with a bit of poetry sprinkled in along the way.
While learning to live with the effects of her trauma, and working with the deficits caused by PTSD (Post-traumatic Stress Disorder), she has co-authored three inspirational books. Her memoir, Untangled, speaks to the courage, resilience, and triumph over her unimaginable hardship. Her newest book, If I Could Tell You How It Feels is a series of essays and poems about living authentically with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Alexis is an experienced speaker on the topics of living with Post-traumatic Stress Disorder. She is also an active blogger who writes about PTSD, Mental Health, and Trauma, with a bit of poetry sprinkled in along the way.
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Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews
February 5, 2018
Alexis Rose was "a victim of unimaginable abuse for the first 20 years of her life, followed by 17 years of threats to stay silent."
She states " Sometimes we just want to say, I may look okay on the outside but, If I could really tell you how it feels..."
Thus she shares her symptoms of complex PTSD - flashbacks, inability to work full time, feeling overwhelmed...
There are beautifully written essays and poems on a number of related topics including grief and mindfulness, choices, the difference between friendships and acquaintances, and Alexis journey through therapy and beyond.
One of her most powerful statements is " I want to find the volume of my voice. I don't know if the volume will change. Maybe it will increase slightly or maybe not. But I know this for sure, my voice will never be silenced again."
Highly recommended.
She states " Sometimes we just want to say, I may look okay on the outside but, If I could really tell you how it feels..."
Thus she shares her symptoms of complex PTSD - flashbacks, inability to work full time, feeling overwhelmed...
There are beautifully written essays and poems on a number of related topics including grief and mindfulness, choices, the difference between friendships and acquaintances, and Alexis journey through therapy and beyond.
One of her most powerful statements is " I want to find the volume of my voice. I don't know if the volume will change. Maybe it will increase slightly or maybe not. But I know this for sure, my voice will never be silenced again."
Highly recommended.
May 22, 2018
If I Could Tell You How It Feels: My Life Journey With PTSD captures Alexis Rose’s journey toward healing from PTSD. The book consists of narratives interspersed with poetry, along with beautiful art by Janet Rosauer. The chapters are short, which I always appreciate since it makes it easier for readers with concentration problems, and they flow nicely. Alexis doesn’t go into details of her trauma, minimizing the chance of triggering her readers.
Over the years Alexis has experienced severe symptoms of PTSD. She has flashbacks which are easily triggered, and she describes the considerable effort she’s had to put in on an ongoing basis toward managing her triggers. As she worked with her therapist she learned tools to manage her ongoing symptoms. However, she has come to understand that for her there will be no cure and she will have long-lasting effects that will require ongoing work to manage.
Alexis describes the multitude of interpersonal challenges that go along with PTSD, from the doctor who asked why she couldn’t just get over it, having to navigate friendships, losing the people that backed out of her life and managing the walls that she put up for self-protection. Her family has been profoundly impacted by her illness, and she describes how roles within the family have had to shift over time, requiring adaptability from all of them.
Self-stigma has been an issue, and she writes “I wrestle with feeling like I’m lazy because I haven’t cured myself of this illness”; this is something that will probably sound familiar to many of us in the mental illness community. She describes self-doubt as an unwanted houseguest, but one that no one else can see. When things get really hard, she has to actively remind herself that she is in the process of healing.
Alexis shares some of the valuable lessons she has learned along her journey. She has come to understand that while PTSD impacts her it doesn’t define her, and while she was a victim she is definitely a survivor. This resonated strongly with me, as I grappled with the term victim with respect to my own experience of workplace bullying. Alexis talks about her struggle to establish an illness-free identity despite her ongoing symptoms; again, this is something I suspect will resonate strongly with many readers. She has learned to set boundaries, remove toxic people from her life, and reach out and ask for help when needed.
Alexis identifies a number of strategies that have been helpful on her non-linear road toward healing. Writing has been helpful for processing memories, and naming what had happened to her made it easier to see the bigger picture. Radical acceptance has allowed her to find greater peace, own her past, and acknowledge the hard work she has put in.
While this book talks about the challenges of PTSD, the focus is very much on healing and learning to live your best life even with ongoing symptoms of illness, and as such readers with various other mental illnesses are likely to feel a sense of connection. The title is very apt, and Alexis does an excellent job of capturing what her healing journey feels like and has felt like at various points along the way. This is an inspirational book that I would highly recommend.
Over the years Alexis has experienced severe symptoms of PTSD. She has flashbacks which are easily triggered, and she describes the considerable effort she’s had to put in on an ongoing basis toward managing her triggers. As she worked with her therapist she learned tools to manage her ongoing symptoms. However, she has come to understand that for her there will be no cure and she will have long-lasting effects that will require ongoing work to manage.
Alexis describes the multitude of interpersonal challenges that go along with PTSD, from the doctor who asked why she couldn’t just get over it, having to navigate friendships, losing the people that backed out of her life and managing the walls that she put up for self-protection. Her family has been profoundly impacted by her illness, and she describes how roles within the family have had to shift over time, requiring adaptability from all of them.
Self-stigma has been an issue, and she writes “I wrestle with feeling like I’m lazy because I haven’t cured myself of this illness”; this is something that will probably sound familiar to many of us in the mental illness community. She describes self-doubt as an unwanted houseguest, but one that no one else can see. When things get really hard, she has to actively remind herself that she is in the process of healing.
Alexis shares some of the valuable lessons she has learned along her journey. She has come to understand that while PTSD impacts her it doesn’t define her, and while she was a victim she is definitely a survivor. This resonated strongly with me, as I grappled with the term victim with respect to my own experience of workplace bullying. Alexis talks about her struggle to establish an illness-free identity despite her ongoing symptoms; again, this is something I suspect will resonate strongly with many readers. She has learned to set boundaries, remove toxic people from her life, and reach out and ask for help when needed.
Alexis identifies a number of strategies that have been helpful on her non-linear road toward healing. Writing has been helpful for processing memories, and naming what had happened to her made it easier to see the bigger picture. Radical acceptance has allowed her to find greater peace, own her past, and acknowledge the hard work she has put in.
While this book talks about the challenges of PTSD, the focus is very much on healing and learning to live your best life even with ongoing symptoms of illness, and as such readers with various other mental illnesses are likely to feel a sense of connection. The title is very apt, and Alexis does an excellent job of capturing what her healing journey feels like and has felt like at various points along the way. This is an inspirational book that I would highly recommend.
May 21, 2018
Difficult but important read on CPTSD recovery
This is the first book I've read from this author, so I didn't know the part of her life she shared in her previous work.
More often than not, books on PTSD and CPTSD tend to be more textbook, self help, or workbook style. This is a first person account, almost journaling with poetry, of one woman's experience. She doesn't want to trigger others, so the events that caused her trauma are not fully described or explained. This is also an apt way to view trauma in general - a vague, threatening, hovering beast a breath away.
The author does well at describing her emotional journey and healing. She's appreciative of those that support her - a key component in any recovery. It gives hope to know that she can have a break away point with her therapist, despite the chronic illness.
I wish the author continued healing and peace.
This is the first book I've read from this author, so I didn't know the part of her life she shared in her previous work.
More often than not, books on PTSD and CPTSD tend to be more textbook, self help, or workbook style. This is a first person account, almost journaling with poetry, of one woman's experience. She doesn't want to trigger others, so the events that caused her trauma are not fully described or explained. This is also an apt way to view trauma in general - a vague, threatening, hovering beast a breath away.
The author does well at describing her emotional journey and healing. She's appreciative of those that support her - a key component in any recovery. It gives hope to know that she can have a break away point with her therapist, despite the chronic illness.
I wish the author continued healing and peace.
October 23, 2018
This is a beautifully written, heart-felt, in depth account of living with PTSD. The author exudes warmth and caring in her written words to those suffering from this complex disorder. The insights into the everyday trials she must deal with on physical and emotional levels are compelling. I am in awe of the courage and persistence she exhibits to forge ahead on a daily basis no matter how exhausting it must be. A unique aspect to the book was the addition of her poetry coupled with beautiful photography. I loved how it supplemented her descriptions of dealing with PTSD. I do not suffer from PTSD, but much of her poetry could apply or speak to me in other ways. She has such insight into the human spirit and a gift for putting it into words.
Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews