Own Your Greatness: Overcome Impostor Syndrome, Beat Self-Doubt, and Succeed in Life

by Lisa Orbé-Austin, Richard Orbé-Austin, Patrick Lawlor (Narrator)

Stop letting imposter syndrome hold you back! This guided workbook of interactive exercises and research-backed activities will help you conquer self-doubt, realize your true worth, and enjoy your success.

How many times have you thought that everyone is crushing it except you? How often have you looked at one of your accomplishments and attributed it to luck or the help of others? It can be difficult to acknowledge our own successes and skills, and overcome the feeling of being an imposter. But moving past that feeling is crucial to continuing down the path to even greater success and happiness.

Own Your Greatness will give you all the tools you need to recognize and overcome the imposter syndrome that is holding you back. Packed full of research- and therapy-backed exercises, prompts, and activities, this interactive workbook will help you:

Identify the root causes of your imposter syndrome
Recognize your natural skills and strengths
Gain the confidence to lead
Speak up for yourself
Feel comfortable receiving and giving praise


With this book, you’ll acknowledge the skills you bring to the table, understand that you truly deserve your success, and take steps to a successful, happy, and fulfilled life.



RUNNING TIME ⇒ 4hrs. and 20mins.

©2020 Dr. Lisa Orbé-Austin and Dr. Richard Orbé-Austin (P)2020 Dreamscape Media, LLC

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Psychology, Personal Development, Audiobook, Business, Professional Development

Audible Audio

First published April 28, 2020

Reviews

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

For most of my life I have been consumed with insecurities about not being enough and that I would be discovered as incompetent. "Own Your Greatness" is helping me to see that I am not the only one and that there are ways to overcome Impostor Syndrome. I always felt like no matter what I put out there, it would be wrong. I have realized recently just how much those insecurities have held me back from my potential. This book is causing me to face things about my life that are difficult but it will be worth it in the end. I highly recommend it!

[Kat Vellos · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was eagerly awaiting this book because I follow @drorbeaustin on Instagram and her content about overcoming imposter syndrome is always so on point. This book went way above and beyond what I was expecting. This book wastes no time getting to the heart of the matter with impostor syndrome and empowering the reader to overcome it.

I knew it would be good because the content and advice in her articles and instagram are excellent, but Own Your Greatness is SO much more comprehensive than I expected. In addition to covering the ground you’d expect — an overview of what imposter syndrome is, identifying your triggers, and coping/healing strategies — it also takes you through identifying where you got your imposter syndrome. In doing so, you can empathetically contextualize it so you can release it, reprogramming your automatic negative thoughts, prioritizing self-care, and setting yourself up for optimal performance in the future.

I love that it's a workbook that you can write and draw in, and that it doesn't feel like a super massive long read. It's book is light in the hand but heavy in depth and breadth. The content goes so deep that it seems like a book that should be leather-bound with gold edges on the pages! Highly recommended for anyone who’s ever dealt with feelings of impostor syndrome and wants to fully see, accept and celebrate their greatness in the present and in the future.

[Kim · Rating 3 out of 5]

Listened to the audiobook, which is never really helpful when the book is part workbook, but also the audiobook was all that the library had available and I wanted to read it before committing to buying. I think that there are some real actionable points that require more introspection than I gave it in the format.

Also, it required that you talk to trusted friends and I don't really have friends, so that's sort of hard. But probably good for those who have friends and the potential for work allies.

[Janice Robertson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Just recently, I took up a new sport and had instant success with it. When I got asked to play on a competitive team and accepted and started playing, I felt like an imposter. I’d look around and think, “Any day now they’re going to realize I’m not good enough to be on this team.”
Because of this experience, the part of the book I liked the best talked about how to get rid of your ANTs - your automatic negative thoughts. That was useful for me because I hadn’t realized unfair comparisons was an ANT. Now I try to think, “For someone new to the sport, I’m doing well.”

[Jung]

Own Your Greatness (2020) is a guided workbook for people who constantly feel like imposters. Drawing on Drs. Lisa and Richard Orbé-Austin’s expertise, it helps you identify and overcome the tiggers, habits and thoughts that activate your imposter syndrome, so you can beat self-doubt and succeed in life.

Dr. Lisa Orbé-Austin is a licensed psychologist, executive coach, and organizational consultant. Her boutique private practice is located in New York City, where she works mostly with high-potential managers and executives. Her organizational work has focused on issues of diversity, equity and inclusion, communication, leadership styles, and team cohesion in corporations, higher education institutions, and nonprofits.

Dr. Lisa Orbé-Austin is a licensed psychologist, executive coach, and organizational consultant. Her views about career management and advancement are regularly sought by the media, and she has appeared in various outlets, such as the New York Times, Forbes, NBC News, Refinery29, and Insight Into Diversity. Dr. Orbé-Austin received her bachelor’s degree in English from Boston College, her master’s degree in counseling psychology from Boston College, and her PhD in counseling psychology from Columbia University.

Dr. Richard Orbé-Austin is a psychologist and a partner of Dynamic Transitions Psychological Consulting, LLP, a career and executive coaching consultancy in New York City. Dr. Orbé-Austin’s opinions and writings have appeared in a variety of publications, including Forbes, Fast Company, Diversity Executive, and ThriveGlobal. He earned his PhD in counseling psychology from Fordham University’s Graduate School of Education and his bachelor’s degree in psychology from NYU.

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A step-by-step guide for overcoming imposter syndrome

Do you find yourself constantly dismissing your achievements? What about worrying that someone might discover you’re incompetent? Do you overwork yourself, striving for perfection in every little task? Or perhaps you simply feel like a fraud, that some combination of luck and charm, not skill, got you here.

If any of these sound familiar, then you’re most likely suffering from imposter syndrome. First coined in the 1970s by two scientists, Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes, imposter syndrome has since become a common term.

As much as seventy percent of the population will experience imposter syndrome at some point. But for others, these feelings are debilitating, and never go away. Imposter syndrome can hold people back in their careers, affect one’s mental health, hurt relationships, and even lead to burnout.

Over many years working as licensed psychologists, the authors have developed a number of clear steps for overcoming imposter syndrome.

In this book, we’ll walk through each step, guided by various reflection exercises. Through these exercises, you’ll develop “coping cards” that you can refer back to whenever you need, and that together represent your action plan to stop feeling like a fraud.

I recommend you grab a pad of paper and a pen, as the exercises will require some writing. I’ll meet you at the next chapter, on the first step of your journey toward owning your greatness.

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Step 1: Identify your imposter origin story

It all begins with a story, one that gets repeated over and over. It shows up at parties, during lunch with colleagues, in morning meetings. Only, this story lives mostly in your head, and is all about how you’re not really skilled at anything, that you must be deceiving everyone.

To overcome imposter syndrome, you have to change this narrative. But to do so, you have to first understand where these imposter feelings originated. For many, they trace back to childhood and their family dynamics.

Perhaps you grew up with very high expectations placed on you, and an emphasis on achievement. Or maybe you played the role of pleasing other family members and fulfilling their needs. Maybe you were constantly compared to another sibling, or your unique skills were never recognized.

For your first exercise, the goal is to identify and understand your imposter origin story. I’m going to ask you to look deeply at your past. What stories did you come to believe about yourself? How did they affect your role in the family, your ideas about competition, or how you receive feedback?

Let’s look at an example from Elizabeth. Her imposter origin story goes like this: “I was always called sensitive in my family, and never seen as the ‘smart one’ compared to my brother. This has led to a high need to please others, and to dismiss the skills I do have because I assume they won’t be valued.”

Before moving to the next chapter, take time now to write out your origin story. If you need help, use this prompt: “The dynamics that prompted my imposter syndrome were…” Be sure to describe the consequences of those dynamics, how they affected you. And try to keep it short, just a few sentences will do.

Before we move on, notice that you’re undertaking the task of dismantling something that developed over many years, maybe even generations. This work may take time; but it is well worth the effort.

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Step 2: Know your triggers

Congratulations! You now have your first coping card – your imposter origin story. This will become the foundation for the next step, identifying your triggers.

A trigger is a situation that activates or increases your imposter feelings. The key thing to understand is that a trigger is only one half of the equation. The other half is your response. When you’re in the grip of imposter syndrome, the responses may come automatically.

But the first step of breaking the cycle of automatic, imposter responses, is to be aware of your triggers and learn to anticipate and prepare for triggering situations. Only then can you begin to change your responses.

Here are just a few examples of triggers that many people with imposter syndrome experience: Getting a promotion or starting a new job; Having your performance evaluated; Giving an important presentation; Receiving compliments; Starting a new relationship; Unfamiliar social situations, such as meeting new people.

Now that you understand what triggers are, it’s time to make your second coping card. In this exercise, you’ll write down all the recent times you can remember feeling like an imposter. Take some time to describe the situation – where were you, who were you with, what was said to you, and how did you react?

When you’re done, take the opportunity to look for patterns in these situations. You might try to complete the sentence, “I’m triggered by situations that, places that, and people who…” Or you might write: “When I’m triggered I’m often thinking or feeling…”

Now you have a solid understanding of your imposter triggers. Let’s move on to step three, which will help you to start changing the narrative.

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Step 3: Change your narrative

“I only have this job because no one more qualified applied. I’m such a fraud. I need to work even harder so they don’t question their decision to hire me.”

Isn’t it time to finally change that tired, old story? I know, some days it feels impossible to see yourself any other way. But in this step, you’ll learn how to craft a more accurate and positive narrative.

The method we’ll use is to “thicken” the story. What does that mean? Well, the thing about your imposter story is that it’s distorted. It is simplistic, one-dimensional, and leaves out a lot of information and context. In other words, it’s thin.

Let’s return to Elizabeth. Remember her? She was always told growing up that she was emotional, compared to her brother, the “smart one.” This led Elizabeth to believe she isn’t smart. She learned to attend to everyone else’s emotional needs instead.

But Elizabeth’s story leaves out a lot. In reality, both she and her brother are smart. While things appear to come easily to her brother, Elizabeth takes her time to learn new things. She needs to study, and write things down to comprehend them.

By thickening our story, we can create something more complex, balanced, accurate, and affirming.

In Elizabeth’s case, she challenges the narrative that she’s not smart. One of the powerful things about a thicker narrative is “both-and” thinking, rather than “either-or.” Her new story questions why someone can’t be both sensitive and smart. It also acknowledges the positive strategies she’s developed – taking notes in meetings, for example.

Okay, so let’s try this strategy for yourself. Take out your notepad and write all your old, imposter narratives down along one column. In the adjacent column, thicken each narrative. What skills or achievements does that story ignore? What is the bigger context for that story? What is missing?

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Step 4: Speak your truth

No one can change their narrative and overcome imposter syndrome alone. When you hold this experience in and keep it to yourself, it has greater power over you. Curiously, the simple strategy of speaking your truth and putting it out into the world, helps weaken its grip.

I want you to start by identifying one or two people in your life who you trust deeply. It could be your best friend, a colleague, your spouse, your mom. Share with them what it’s like to live with imposter syndrome, what anxieties and fears come up for you, and the things that trigger it.

You might be amazed that these confidants have experienced similar feelings. Or they may reflect back to you all the skills and achievements they associate with you. And it might help you be more open about this with more people.

The other aspect of speaking your truth is owning your skills and achievements. Remember what we discovered in the previous chapter – your imposter narrative often hides the truth, crowding out your actual achievements and the things you are good at.

Reversing that story requires acknowledging that you have lots of talents.

For this exercise, I want you to simply write down a list of your skills. What do you excel at? What are some things you often don’t promote about yourself, or that don’t get recognized as often? It’s helpful to define skills broadly here, such as emotional intelligence, interpersonal skills, communication, body-kinesthetic skills, musical or visual skills, and creativity.

If you’re struggling, that makes sense because your imposter story has been hiding and downplaying your gifts and talents for years. Try this to get the ball rolling: Think of an accomplishment or two, something you’ve done in your life that you’re proud of. What skills did those achievements require?

This list of skills will be your fourth coping card, and it’s a handy one to refer back to whenever you need a reminder of your greatness.

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Step 5: Silence your ANTs, or Automatic Negative Thoughts

Imagine you’ve laid out a beautiful picnic. There’s fresh sandwiches on soft bread, and piles of colorful fruit. You’re sipping on a glass of wine when suddenly, the ants show up. They start carrying off entire grapes and swarming your tupperware.

These annoying little creatures are oddly like the negative thoughts that crowd your mind when you’re in the grip of imposter syndrome. They come from nowhere, are intrusive, and can carry a lot of weight.

For Step 5, we’re going to learn how to silence these ANTs, or Automatic Negative Thoughts. That’s because they interrupt your ability to change your imposter story and think positively about yourself.

Let’s begin by looking at a number of common ANTs. As I describe them, think about which apply to you.

​​Mind-reading: “They must all think I’m incompetent.”
Labeling: “I’m so stupid, I can’t believe I did that.”
Fortune-telling: “There’s no way this is going to work out.”
Catastrophizing: “They’re going to fire me if I make a mistake.”
Unfair Comparisons: “Everyone here is so accomplished compared to me.”
All-or-nothing Thinking: “If it’s not perfect, then it’s a failure.”
Discounting Positives: “That compliment isn’t genuine, they were just being nice.”

For your fifth coping card, I want you to write down your most common or strongest Automatic Negative

Thoughts. How do they contribute to your imposter syndrome?

Now it’s time to develop some ANT repellent.

Begin by asking challenging questions of each ANT. For example, if you tend to catastrophize, you might ask, “What evidence do I have that this could happen?” or “Has anyone ever been fired for giving a poor presentation before?” Write out a list of challenge questions that you can ask yourself in the future, when each ANT crawls its way into your mind.

Lastly, replace each ANT with a positive thought. For example, “If I make a mistake, they won’t fire me. It will give me the opportunity to receive feedback, and that will help me grow and do my job better.”

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Step 6: Experiment with new roles

Hopefully at this point, you’re already starting to feel a change in how you think about yourself. Now it’s time to put this new you into action.

Step 7 is all about giving up the roles that sustain your fraud thinking and experimenting with new roles. First, let’s explore typical roles that people with imposter syndrome tend to play, and their alternatives.

The Helper: Rather than always being the one with all the answers, the go-to person for support, learn how to ask for help yourself, and instead become the Help-Seeker.
The Superperson: Instead of trying to do everything on your own and taking all the responsibility, learn to delegate tasks and work in a team, becoming the Collaborator.
The Failure Avoider: You don’t always need to play it safe. Instead, learn how to take calculated risks and try new things as the Risk-Taker, even if you might fail.
Behind-the-Scenes Leader: Stop letting your imposter syndrome hold you back from the spotlight, and learn to be the Visible Leader once in a while.

It can be scary to play new roles. The key is to be light-hearted and playful at first. You’re experimenting here, trying it on for size. You don’t have to stop the old roles entirely, just think of “adding in” these new roles to your repertoire. They are options that are available to you.

It can also help to start with lower stakes situations first, like identifying one person to try this new role out with. Give yourself time to get comfortable in it, before moving into higher stakes situations.

Now to the exercise. For this coping card, list the new roles you want to try. What situations will each role be particularly relevant to? For example, with your manager, your siblings, or at your book club.

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Step 7: Build your dream team

In this final step, you’re going to start building a dream team of people to support you in this ongoing journey. These people will provide advice or a listening ear when the going gets tough.

Let’s explore the six members you might want to have on your team. As I describe them, write down one or two people who can play each role for you. Also identify the situations or moments when you’ll reach out to that person. This will become your seventh and final coping card.

Okay, here we go. The six dream team members are…

“The cheerleader” is a person who can lift you up when you’re feeling low, guilty, or falling back into old patterns. It’s most likely a friend, family member, or trusted colleague.

“The grounder” can give you a reality check when you’re catastrophizing or spinning. Choose someone in your life who is rational or realistic, and won’t be afraid to speak honestly.

“The action planner” is somebody good at solving problems, and who will help you break things into steps and make a plan. They usually have insight about the situation, like a colleague.

“The big-picture person” knows you well. They will remind you of where you’re trying to go in life, what you value, and who you want to be when the small stuff is overwhelming you.

“The imposter expert” could be someone who suffers from imposter syndrome as well, or has specialized training, like a therapist or coach.

Lastly, “the mentor” is someone more experienced in your field who can help you navigate and advance in your career.

Congratulations for making it this far! Now I want you to gather up all your coping cards from each step. You should have seven altogether. These are the tools you can return to if you start slipping into imposter stories. Together, they serve as your individualized action plan.

Changing your relationship to yourself is no easy task. But can you picture it? That’s you, living your best life, no longer feeling like an imposter, and believing in yourself.

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While it takes some work, it is possible to stop feeling like an imposter. In this book, you’ve learned where your imposter story came from, what triggers it, how to change your narrative and speak your truth, how to silence automatic negative thoughts, experimenting with non-imposter roles, and building a dream team of people to support you. Together, these tools will help you overcome imposter syndrome once and for all and start owning your greatness.

And here’s some more actionable advice: Prioritize self-care.

Many people who think they’re an imposter respond by digging in harder, working themselves to the bone to compensate. They may think that any mistake is a complete failure. All this overworking and perfectionism can easily lead to burnout, a common experience for people with imposter syndrome. That’s why it’s so important to prioritize self-care activities: Meditation, soaking in the tub, going for a walk, listening to music, reading, taking up a new hobby, cooking, time with friends, napping, going to a museum. Anything that brings you joy, helps you relax and rebuilds your energy.

[Karina · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was more of a workbook that you work through, in learning how to recognize the signs and dismantle the triggers associated with imposter syndrome. I took the test that is mentioned in book. My score was fairly high, so I wanted to know more about why that was. At times the book felt repetitive. Some of the signs mentioned in the book I display myself. Such as discounting praise, anxiety from internal standards I set myself, and struggle with perfectionism. The subsequent chapters in the book, breakdown the four hallmarks of imposter syndrome, and how you can work through them to alleviate fear and self-doubt.
1. Diligence and handwork
2. Intellectual inauthenticity
3. Charm and perceptiveness
4. Seeking mentorship for external validation
This is a good book for anyone in the medical field who struggles with imposter syndrome and for women, since societal stereotyping leads women to feel less competent especially in STEM.

[rainbow trout · Rating 3 out of 5]

A nice, succinct, mostly work-focused and heavily Capitalistic book about the insidious ways imposter system brings us down. I appreciated that they discuss symptoms and ramifications of the behavior you wouldn't typically think of; tbh I ended up getting a lot out of it. If you have anything beyond a surface-level understanding of the disorder I don't think you'd get much out of it, though. A nice read and I'll probably skim the print copy again sometime in the future as a reminder.

[Lidia · Rating 2 out of 5]

I liked the content itself (a bit repetitive, yet good), however, I didn't quite like the way the information was presented, which made my reading experience a bit unorganized. Therefore, the relationship with the book was compromised (info retention, etc). Maybe reading the physical book would be different, but it was not my case.

[Ivs Pav · Rating 2 out of 5]

disappointed... generic, boring, nothing that was said has impacted me, all of the mentioned things are things I know. It's a workbook, quite simple to read and to follow. Would not recommend though, seems kind of shallow.

[Yanal · Rating 3 out of 5]

Blinks:
1. Identify your imposter origin story. Growing up with high expectations or trying to please others.
2. Know your triggers. A situation that triggers your imposter feelings. When you get questioned on your analysis.
3. Change your narrative. Change the story in your head so that you disprove your doubts. If you are in a certain position, it's because you can do that position.
4. Speak your truth.
5. Silence your ANTs, or Automatic Negative thoughts.
6. Experiment with new roles.
7. Build your dream team.

[Jessica · Rating 3 out of 5]

As most self-help books do, this one presents strategies to beat imposter syndrome. However, the strategies, such as self-care, managing life’s disruptions, and creating goals, aren’t necessarily new in creating a more positive self, rather a different lens to help readers own who they are. Of course, these strategies take discipline and mindset, and the book does serve as a workbook to take ownership. The phases - Clarify. Choose. Create. - provide a framework in which to begin.

[Lena · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very helpful with helping me to identify my triggers, how to overcome them, how IS shows up in my life (at work, at home) how to specifically solicit help and accountability from my "Dream Team" (my favorite part), and how to help others that I know are going through it. This book was everything I needed as I progress to the next level as this is what has been holding me back. Highly recommend.

[Jessie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was really amazing. I love the way the information was presented and the exercise prompts throughout. As someone with significant imposter syndrome, I did confront a few unhealthy behaviors and patterns thanks to insights from this book.

[Michael Wolcott · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very quick and useful approach to managing imposter syndrome. The authors provide a psychological perspective with immediate application activities throughout the book. Definitely helpful for anyone looking for techniques.

[Marisa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fantastic words!

[Joelle Boudreaux · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a good workbook for helping through through IS!

[Joanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

This gave me hope that I can work through and defeat (or at least control) my imposter syndrome. Very practical and action-oriented.

[James Wu · Rating 5 out of 5]

no non-sense, practical, and comprehensive guide to helping others and ourselves conquer imposter syndrome.

[Amanda · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was revelatory. I'd like to read it again when I have more time to work on the homework and exercises.

[Sara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Eye opening, practical advice

[Moo · Rating 2 out of 5]

It's an "Ok" book about Imposter syndrome but not a great one

[Synthia Salomon · Rating 5 out of 5]

A step-by-step guide for overcoming imposter syndrome.

To learn: Silence your ANTs, or Automatic Negative Thoughts

[Bee Reckless · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book had some interesting points and definitely helped with some imposter syndrome stuff I’m going through but overall just wasn’t for me.

[Marlene · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fantastic. This was worth reading. I really liked the definition of the Dream Team. I'll be doing that. I might consider buying this book as a reference/reread.

[Deborah Day · Rating 5 out of 5]

Simple and clear. Interactive workbook. Practical steps to help you understand and overcome Imposter Syndrome.

[Emmy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book. Not the best as an audio book. Great concepts and a good tool to help overcome. Will probably try to get a physical copy to read to absorb more.

[Ali · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great workbook on addressing Imposter Syndrome. A must read.

[Veronica Kokas · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5/5

Helpful tools for dealing with impostor syndrome, though I kind of wish I had gotten a hard copy instead of an ebook since this is more of a workbook.

[C.J. Maughan · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a fantastic book that was surprisingly incredibly helpful. I'd picked it up after following the authors on Instagram and finding their posts insightful and uncomfortable in that it hit to the core of what I'd been struggling with for a long time. Imposter Syndrome was sort of one of those buzzwords I'd hear about in memes and online, but never really thought applied to me.

I was so wrong. While this book didn't suddenly make me a different person, I have the tools now to stop and realize when I'm bending reality to how I've been conditioned to based on my past experiences, upbringing and negative thoughts. I can take a step back, realize I'm in charge of how I react to certain triggers and change the role I play.

When I first bought the book I didn't realize it was actually a workbook and this turned me off (a lot of flashbacks to bad high school assignments) but I made myself do them and I can say without hesitation, that there were A LOT of uncomfortable and emotional things that came out because I had to put pen to paper. It was surprising and insightful (in a weird, sad sort of way?) and the book isn't designed to just pass the time. There were full weeks I spent on just one chapter because I had to think through the "why" and what I wanted to be different.

I highly recommend this book if you've ever felt yourself stuck in the "please to succeed" mindset or you consistently doubt compliments people give you or you're deathly afraid people will find out how incompetent you (think) you are. All of these things won't go away overnight, or really ever I think, but they can be managed and I'm very much looking forward to doing this.

[Mark Nutting · Rating 4 out of 5]

What I particularly liked about this book on overcoming imposter syndrome is that it had strategies to help the reader as well as exercises for the reader to complete. It is a workbook of sorts.