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Logged In and Stressed Out: How Social Media is Affecting Your Mental Health and What You Can Do About It
Social media is here to stay, and Logged In and Stressed Out presents the right information and tools to improve our lives through examining and changing our digital habits.
America is facing a mental health crisis. Studies show that the average American is spending more than 10 hours a day in front of their screens, suicide rates are at an all-time high, and mental health professionals are working hard to address social media’s role in this epidemic. Social media can sometimes feel like an unpredictable roller coaster ride. One’s mood can swing from elated after getting a slew of “likes” on a post to worthlessness and deflation in response to being criticized in a comment thread. Too often, bad feelings from social media interactions linger, negatively affecting our off-line lives and worsening already present mental health issues.
Instead of demonizing social media by taking a one-note, “digital detox” approach, Logged In and Stressed Out recognizes social media is not, itself, the problem--it’s how we use it that needs examining. Paula Durlofsky guides readers through its impact on break-ups and infidelities, social distortion and comparison, trauma and triggers, social media binging, depression, anxiety, and other common concerns, using real stories from her own practice to personalize concepts and recommendations.
By setting needed limits and embracing new practices, it is possible to improve mental health when using social media. Durlofsky details the whys and hows of creating a safe digital space, cultivating digital and social media mindfulness, applying the techniques of metalizing while consuming social media, and decreasing social media and digital reactivity. She offers suggestions for how to use social media and digital technology to create meaningful social interactions and positive mental health and provides readers with practical steps to put these ideas into action.
Social media is here to stay, and Logged In and Stressed Out presents the right information and tools to improve our lives through examining and changing our digital habits.
America is facing a mental health crisis. Studies show that the average American is spending more than 10 hours a day in front of their screens, suicide rates are at an all-time high, and mental health professionals are working hard to address social media’s role in this epidemic. Social media can sometimes feel like an unpredictable roller coaster ride. One’s mood can swing from elated after getting a slew of “likes” on a post to worthlessness and deflation in response to being criticized in a comment thread. Too often, bad feelings from social media interactions linger, negatively affecting our off-line lives and worsening already present mental health issues.
Instead of demonizing social media by taking a one-note, “digital detox” approach, Logged In and Stressed Out recognizes social media is not, itself, the problem--it’s how we use it that needs examining. Paula Durlofsky guides readers through its impact on break-ups and infidelities, social distortion and comparison, trauma and triggers, social media binging, depression, anxiety, and other common concerns, using real stories from her own practice to personalize concepts and recommendations.
By setting needed limits and embracing new practices, it is possible to improve mental health when using social media. Durlofsky details the whys and hows of creating a safe digital space, cultivating digital and social media mindfulness, applying the techniques of metalizing while consuming social media, and decreasing social media and digital reactivity. She offers suggestions for how to use social media and digital technology to create meaningful social interactions and positive mental health and provides readers with practical steps to put these ideas into action.
Social media is here to stay, and Logged In and Stressed Out presents the right information and tools to improve our lives through examining and changing our digital habits.
192 pages, Hardcover
Published December 21, 2020
4 people are currently reading
145 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
October 1, 2021
As someone who struggles with depression and anxiety that's looking to spend less time on social media, I picked up this book hoping to find concrete tips for mindfulness, as well as how to feel more fulfilled online and how to disconnect in an age where technology is twined into every aspect of our lives.
PROS
--It had tons of good general tips for mental well-being.
--I found the last two chapters very helpful in terms of providing specific, actionable items that can be taken with regards to social media usage.
CONS
--A lot of the advice offered was generic and not specialized to social media usage. Practicing daily gratitude, spending more time with friends and family, eating healthy, and keeping a journal are all good pieces of advice when dealing with mental illness, but they don't really have much to do with social media. They're more of a catch-all fix.
--Almost all of the author's case studies picked at some underlying parental trauma issue that was causing the user to act out or binge use social media. This was weird. There's plenty of people with mental illnesses caused by other reasons--and there's also people without mental illness looking at ways to cut down on their media usage as well.
--This book was published in Nov 2020, but didn't feature any sections on social media usage RE: the pandemic, or increased screentime RE: working from home. I wish that had been covered.
All in all, I felt pretty ambivalent about this book after finishing it. There's maybe two or three useful tips I learned; I don't think anyone who's already seeing a therapist will pick up anything major from this book.
PROS
--It had tons of good general tips for mental well-being.
--I found the last two chapters very helpful in terms of providing specific, actionable items that can be taken with regards to social media usage.
CONS
--A lot of the advice offered was generic and not specialized to social media usage. Practicing daily gratitude, spending more time with friends and family, eating healthy, and keeping a journal are all good pieces of advice when dealing with mental illness, but they don't really have much to do with social media. They're more of a catch-all fix.
--Almost all of the author's case studies picked at some underlying parental trauma issue that was causing the user to act out or binge use social media. This was weird. There's plenty of people with mental illnesses caused by other reasons--and there's also people without mental illness looking at ways to cut down on their media usage as well.
--This book was published in Nov 2020, but didn't feature any sections on social media usage RE: the pandemic, or increased screentime RE: working from home. I wish that had been covered.
All in all, I felt pretty ambivalent about this book after finishing it. There's maybe two or three useful tips I learned; I don't think anyone who's already seeing a therapist will pick up anything major from this book.
September 3, 2022
As a fellow psychologist I find Dr. Durlofsky's analysis of the difficulties that develop with social media to be spot on. Her use of psychological theory and analysis of social media difficulties through those theories is clear, concise and logical.
I think there is MUCH here that could be helpful for those grappling with problems with social media issues. I also think the book could serve as a primer for those of us who treat such individuals. Thank you Dr. Durlofsky!
I think there is MUCH here that could be helpful for those grappling with problems with social media issues. I also think the book could serve as a primer for those of us who treat such individuals. Thank you Dr. Durlofsky!
February 6, 2023
i kinda skimmed this tbh. pretty mid
February 8, 2021
Logged In And Stressed Out cites numerous studies and personal anecdotes from the authors therapy sessions to show the pros and cons (mostly cons) of social media and how to find balance in the digital age.
Rating: 3/5
Full takeaways⬇️⬇️
http://bulletpointreading.com/2021/02...
Rating: 3/5
Full takeaways⬇️⬇️
http://bulletpointreading.com/2021/02...
August 2, 2022
Insightful - most of us already know the things in this book are haunting society but her end-of-chapter skill-builders and exercises are great!
February 2, 2021
This book was pretty insightful. Although It’s been 3 and a half months since I’ve quit social media, this book was a great reminder as to why! Also, this was the first time I’ve seen “Stonewalling” and my mouth was floored because that was one of my bad habits, just never had a name for it. Lastly, “Frustration Tolerance” needs to be spoken about more often. Two terms that will be added to my vocabulary and consciousness forever. Thank You Dr. Durlofksy. Keep writing!
December 6, 2023
Great book! Very informative and teaches a lot about how to navigate the online space in a healthier way. Also very relevant to mental health issues today.
January 22, 2023
This is a fitting read for #mentalhealthawarenessmonth.
Because the voice of discouraged dissatisfaction is often amplified after using social media, I’ve often considered how to navigate these unforgiving waters.
Instead of blaming the tool, Paula provides a well-rounded resource on how we can establish social media literacy, processing knowledge and beliefs from social media through a critical thinking lens.
What words/images get my attention? What is the purpose of this message? What values, beliefs, and lifestyles are communicated in the post? Do they align with my values?
By far, the behavior change that has minimized my fabricated dissatisfaction most is restricting the amount of time I can spend on specific apps. Focused time to network / catch up with friends and more time to read!
This was a great reminder to avoid reactive relationships with media that are so easy to revert to.
Highlights:
Don’t log on to social media when you’re sad.
Chronic and unnecessary feelings of self-directed shame are exhausting and toxic to our mental health.
Practice self-compassion, celebrate accomplishments, enjoy time alone, identify characteristics you like, and give yourself permission to ask for help.
Because the voice of discouraged dissatisfaction is often amplified after using social media, I’ve often considered how to navigate these unforgiving waters.
Instead of blaming the tool, Paula provides a well-rounded resource on how we can establish social media literacy, processing knowledge and beliefs from social media through a critical thinking lens.
What words/images get my attention? What is the purpose of this message? What values, beliefs, and lifestyles are communicated in the post? Do they align with my values?
By far, the behavior change that has minimized my fabricated dissatisfaction most is restricting the amount of time I can spend on specific apps. Focused time to network / catch up with friends and more time to read!
This was a great reminder to avoid reactive relationships with media that are so easy to revert to.
Highlights:
Don’t log on to social media when you’re sad.
Chronic and unnecessary feelings of self-directed shame are exhausting and toxic to our mental health.
Practice self-compassion, celebrate accomplishments, enjoy time alone, identify characteristics you like, and give yourself permission to ask for help.
March 1, 2021
Read this over the weekend. Mostly because it is a library book and is due in a few days. I could prob extend it but where’s the fun in that. Probably a timely read as I’ve just hit a a lil bit of an isolation spell. Just hit winter wall a week or so ago so I guess that makes sense.
Not a bad read. I found a bit on attachment types and the way we use social media pretty interesting. I do appreciate that this author (a psychologist) always asks people about their social media habits. It’s a H U G E part of our lives. I’d say the majority of my social life is probably online.
I’ve a bit of a burden complex so always feel like reaching out to a particular person would be annoying(?) so I shitpost and people can selectively choose to interact or not. There’s some other not great habits I have so I think I’ll at least be a little more mindful of my usage.
I’d recommend if you’re the type of person that likes to catch yourself on your own bullshit...and like grow or whatever 😙🌱
Not a bad read. I found a bit on attachment types and the way we use social media pretty interesting. I do appreciate that this author (a psychologist) always asks people about their social media habits. It’s a H U G E part of our lives. I’d say the majority of my social life is probably online.
I’ve a bit of a burden complex so always feel like reaching out to a particular person would be annoying(?) so I shitpost and people can selectively choose to interact or not. There’s some other not great habits I have so I think I’ll at least be a little more mindful of my usage.
I’d recommend if you’re the type of person that likes to catch yourself on your own bullshit...and like grow or whatever 😙🌱
August 23, 2022
*2.4
I think the book would be more useful to someone who actually uses social media. If I were a social media user, I would have hoped that the book were more focused. Most chapters boiled down to the same points and I didn't see a reason for that many chapters:
- Be intentional before and during social media use
- Spend time with family and friends in real life
- Tolerate and accept negative feelings
- Talk to a mental health professional
Some slightly inaccurate things I had issue with:
- The stages of grief
- Blue light vs. sleep
- "Having a phone in the same room as us raises our stress and cortisol levels. Extended periods of high cortisol levels increase our risk for diabetes, depression, insomnia, high blood pressure, cardiac disease, and obesity" (140). Not necessarily a direct connection.
I think the book would be more useful to someone who actually uses social media. If I were a social media user, I would have hoped that the book were more focused. Most chapters boiled down to the same points and I didn't see a reason for that many chapters:
- Be intentional before and during social media use
- Spend time with family and friends in real life
- Tolerate and accept negative feelings
- Talk to a mental health professional
Some slightly inaccurate things I had issue with:
- The stages of grief
- Blue light vs. sleep
- "Having a phone in the same room as us raises our stress and cortisol levels. Extended periods of high cortisol levels increase our risk for diabetes, depression, insomnia, high blood pressure, cardiac disease, and obesity" (140). Not necessarily a direct connection.
May 26, 2024
A good book that summarizes and includes a lot of insight and helpful tips, but I agree that some of the actions points don’t really move into the HOW deeply enough. There were also multiple editing misses in the book that were really off putting considering the need for this book to feel “valid.” I’m not upset a read it, just hope I can find something a bit better in the future. Really thorough Notes/Bibliography sections for additional reading!
August 16, 2022
Not the best book I’ve read on social media addiction. If it was the first one I’ve ever read it would have been ok but there are far better books out there. This could be an “introduction” to breaking social media addiction.
February 11, 2023
An interesting read. I always find contributions from clients the most engaging aspects so I would have preferred if there were more of these. The tips at the ends of chapters were helpful but I would have preferred some more detailed guidance or emphasis on practical applications.
August 22, 2024
Quick impressions: This book not only shows that social media can affect your mental health. It also gives you the tools and advice to do something helpful and constructive about it.
(A full detailed review available on my blog soon.)
(A full detailed review available on my blog soon.)
February 23, 2022
All good information. I liked Unplugged, too.
July 10, 2023
Very informative and engaging! Would recommend to anyone interested in how technology and social media affects mental health and wellbeing.
September 1, 2022
Great book with lots of genuine and helpful advice. I especially found the chapters about the importance of friendships and social networks in the digital age particularly helpful. Highly recommend reading this book!
Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews