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Pee Wees: Confessions of a Hockey Parent
A New York Times bestselling author takes a rollicking deep dive into the ultra-competitive world of youth hockey
Rich Cohen, the New York Times –bestselling author of The Chicago Story of a Curse and The 1985 Chicago Bears and the Wild Heart of Football , turns his attention to matters closer to his son’s elite Pee Wee hockey team and himself, a former player and a devoted hockey parent.
In Pee Confessions of a Hockey Parent , Cohen takes us through a season of hard-fought competition in Fairfield County, Connecticut, an affluent suburb of New York City. Part memoir and part exploration of youth sports and the exploding popularity of American hockey, Pee Wees follows the ups and downs of the Ridgefield Bears, the twelve-year-old boys and girls on the team, and the parents watching, cheering, conniving, and cursing in the stands. It is a book about the love of the game, the love of parents for their children, and the triumphs and struggles of both.
Rich Cohen, the New York Times –bestselling author of The Chicago Story of a Curse and The 1985 Chicago Bears and the Wild Heart of Football , turns his attention to matters closer to his son’s elite Pee Wee hockey team and himself, a former player and a devoted hockey parent.
In Pee Confessions of a Hockey Parent , Cohen takes us through a season of hard-fought competition in Fairfield County, Connecticut, an affluent suburb of New York City. Part memoir and part exploration of youth sports and the exploding popularity of American hockey, Pee Wees follows the ups and downs of the Ridgefield Bears, the twelve-year-old boys and girls on the team, and the parents watching, cheering, conniving, and cursing in the stands. It is a book about the love of the game, the love of parents for their children, and the triumphs and struggles of both.
240 pages, Hardcover
First published January 12, 2021
66 people are currently reading
1052 people want to read
About the author
Rich Cohen
36 books470 followersRICH COHEN is the author of Sweet and Low (FSG, 2006), Tough Jews, The Avengers, The Record Men, and the memoir Lake Effect. His work has appeared in many major publications, and he is a contributing editor at Rolling Stone. He lives with his family in Connecticut.
For more information, please see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rich_Coh...
For more information, please see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rich_Coh...
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 74 reviews
February 20, 2021
I picked up this book because youth hockey has been in the news a lot in Connecticut over the past few months. My daughter is a figure skater who has been directly impacted by the behavior of the youth hockey leagues in the state as well as greater New England. We personally know many people involved in Connecticut youth hockey and have skated at many of the rinks mentioned throughout the state.
Hockey culture is prevalent in many other youth team sports although not to the same degree in my experience for multiple reasons. The first is because hockey seasons are so extended versus other sports. The second is that hockey is freaking expensive. When a family is shelling out thousands of dollars a year (and not just $1-$2K), they tend to be a lot more invested versus a $145 fee to play fall soccer. Another is that hockey is traditionally more action packed and filled with fisticuffs. This brings out louder and more in your face behavior from spectators. Yet another is the tradition of parents acting as assistant coaches and of course the favoritism toward their own children. There's a tradition of not following the rules from playing games in the hall at a hotel to decking your opponent even though your coach told you not to do that.
I experienced a lot of this through synchronized skating of all things. You would think little girls in dainty dresses wouldn't have the drama. Not a chance. The parents' social status was entirely based upon what team your child skated on. If you wanted to ensure a spot on a higher level team for your child, you paid for useless "talk and glide" lessons for your child with one of the team coaches. Your kid would just skate around the rink for half an hour talking to the coach without actually doing or learning anything. The parents would sit in the stands and discuss all of the skaters on the ice and who was better than whom. On trips, the alcohol came out in the rooms while the kids all congregated in the hallways. For most families, it was about the parents' social lives with the other parents, not about the kids loving to skate.
All of this is exposed in Rich Cohen's book. It's well written and I actually felt palpable dislike toward the parent coaches for his son's team. How was there no oversight whatsoever from upper team management about the actual coach of the team going AWOL? I liked how Cohen presented himself as human and failable. Many of his parenting decisions are not ones I would have made. For example, my kid wouldn't be out in the hall playing knee hockey after being told specifically not to by the hotel management upon check in. I also never lose sight of the fact that my kid skates because my kid wants to skate. She can quit. If I still want to be involved in the sport, I can do that myself as there are other roles to play besides "skating parent".
The book reinforced the stereotypes I had about youth hockey from seeing it up close for so many years. The lack of consequences for unwanted behavior and the celebration or almost celebration of getting away with doing things you aren't supposed to do are prevalent. I believe this is why youth hockey shut down for approximately two months in Connecticut. The kids and their parents weren't willing to follow the rules. All you had to do was look at the families congregating in large groups in the lobby and the beer cans all over the parking lot. Many of those cans were from adult hockey but the parents tailgate in the parking lot too.
Overall, I think this is a great look inside youth hockey and one I would recommend to parents starting out on their journey. Believe it or not, I love hockey. I think it is a great game. I just wish the parents at the lower levels of all sports would cool it. Let your kids enjoy what they do, especially when they are younger. How their Squirt team does is of no consequence overall should they choose to continue in hockey for years or leave after the season. For my daughter, nine years later, not one skater from her skating team still skates for the organization and only one (not my daughter) is still competing in synchronized skating. Give them good memories and good life lessons.
Hockey culture is prevalent in many other youth team sports although not to the same degree in my experience for multiple reasons. The first is because hockey seasons are so extended versus other sports. The second is that hockey is freaking expensive. When a family is shelling out thousands of dollars a year (and not just $1-$2K), they tend to be a lot more invested versus a $145 fee to play fall soccer. Another is that hockey is traditionally more action packed and filled with fisticuffs. This brings out louder and more in your face behavior from spectators. Yet another is the tradition of parents acting as assistant coaches and of course the favoritism toward their own children. There's a tradition of not following the rules from playing games in the hall at a hotel to decking your opponent even though your coach told you not to do that.
I experienced a lot of this through synchronized skating of all things. You would think little girls in dainty dresses wouldn't have the drama. Not a chance. The parents' social status was entirely based upon what team your child skated on. If you wanted to ensure a spot on a higher level team for your child, you paid for useless "talk and glide" lessons for your child with one of the team coaches. Your kid would just skate around the rink for half an hour talking to the coach without actually doing or learning anything. The parents would sit in the stands and discuss all of the skaters on the ice and who was better than whom. On trips, the alcohol came out in the rooms while the kids all congregated in the hallways. For most families, it was about the parents' social lives with the other parents, not about the kids loving to skate.
All of this is exposed in Rich Cohen's book. It's well written and I actually felt palpable dislike toward the parent coaches for his son's team. How was there no oversight whatsoever from upper team management about the actual coach of the team going AWOL? I liked how Cohen presented himself as human and failable. Many of his parenting decisions are not ones I would have made. For example, my kid wouldn't be out in the hall playing knee hockey after being told specifically not to by the hotel management upon check in. I also never lose sight of the fact that my kid skates because my kid wants to skate. She can quit. If I still want to be involved in the sport, I can do that myself as there are other roles to play besides "skating parent".
The book reinforced the stereotypes I had about youth hockey from seeing it up close for so many years. The lack of consequences for unwanted behavior and the celebration or almost celebration of getting away with doing things you aren't supposed to do are prevalent. I believe this is why youth hockey shut down for approximately two months in Connecticut. The kids and their parents weren't willing to follow the rules. All you had to do was look at the families congregating in large groups in the lobby and the beer cans all over the parking lot. Many of those cans were from adult hockey but the parents tailgate in the parking lot too.
Overall, I think this is a great look inside youth hockey and one I would recommend to parents starting out on their journey. Believe it or not, I love hockey. I think it is a great game. I just wish the parents at the lower levels of all sports would cool it. Let your kids enjoy what they do, especially when they are younger. How their Squirt team does is of no consequence overall should they choose to continue in hockey for years or leave after the season. For my daughter, nine years later, not one skater from her skating team still skates for the organization and only one (not my daughter) is still competing in synchronized skating. Give them good memories and good life lessons.
February 14, 2021
I’ll begin with my own confession: I was a hockey parent myself. A hockey mom, to be exact. Although it’s been 10 years now since my own son graduated from high school and ended his hockey career, his years in travel (and then high school) hockey remain happy memories (with great stories) for me -- and, most importantly, for him! Rich Cohen’s book is a quick, fun read for any hockey parent . . . as long as you don’t mind the mirror he holds up to reveal your ridiculous antics behind the glass.
Recommended for hockey parents.
Recommended for hockey parents.
March 26, 2021
At first, I thought this was just a memoir of a dad watching his son play hockey and was ready to give a three-star rating. Rich Cohen is a good writer; I loved his books on the 1985 Chicago Bears and the curse surrounding the Chicago Cubs and his look at traveling with the Rolling Stones (The Sun and the Moon and the Rolling Stones) is on my to-be-read list. But this one started out slowly for me. It seemed more the rant of a parent who was upset his kid wasn't getting enough ice time.
But then, the red goal light kicked on in my consciousness and I realized this was far more than a take on a Pee Wee hockey season. This was about parents, dreams, class, status, hopes, kids trying to have fun while adults took it away from them, competition, life. It's an amazing look at it all.
The book is broken down into months; the team plays from November through April. There's an "Interlude," in which Cohen writes about a tournament at Lake Placid and it gives him the opportunity to write about the 1980 Miracle on Ice USA Olympic team and the Summit Series of 1972 between the Soviet Union and Canada (immortalized in The Tragically Hip song "Fireworks" "If there's a goal that everyone remembers, it was back on ol' '72. We all squeezed the stick and we all pulled the trigger...."
There's also a section where Cohen confronts one of the coaches about the playing time of his son and how he was treated when he had the flu. The coach's daughter played on the first shift, and Cohen argued that his son was faster. As the argument heated up, Cohen bet the coach $1,000 his son could beat the coach's daughter in a race on the ice. It seems like the cliche parent vs. coach confrontation, but Cohen has the vision and words to be able to explain it in his writing.
This is an excellent book about the role of a hockey parent and the hopes they have for their kids. Again, kids want to have fun, parents want them to excel perhaps more than the kids do themselves and Cohen captures that well. Readers, stick with this one. It may start off slow and hits the crossbar at first, but soon it becomes a breakaway goal scoring opportunity. (hockey cliches as metaphors for this read.)
But then, the red goal light kicked on in my consciousness and I realized this was far more than a take on a Pee Wee hockey season. This was about parents, dreams, class, status, hopes, kids trying to have fun while adults took it away from them, competition, life. It's an amazing look at it all.
The book is broken down into months; the team plays from November through April. There's an "Interlude," in which Cohen writes about a tournament at Lake Placid and it gives him the opportunity to write about the 1980 Miracle on Ice USA Olympic team and the Summit Series of 1972 between the Soviet Union and Canada (immortalized in The Tragically Hip song "Fireworks" "If there's a goal that everyone remembers, it was back on ol' '72. We all squeezed the stick and we all pulled the trigger...."
There's also a section where Cohen confronts one of the coaches about the playing time of his son and how he was treated when he had the flu. The coach's daughter played on the first shift, and Cohen argued that his son was faster. As the argument heated up, Cohen bet the coach $1,000 his son could beat the coach's daughter in a race on the ice. It seems like the cliche parent vs. coach confrontation, but Cohen has the vision and words to be able to explain it in his writing.
This is an excellent book about the role of a hockey parent and the hopes they have for their kids. Again, kids want to have fun, parents want them to excel perhaps more than the kids do themselves and Cohen captures that well. Readers, stick with this one. It may start off slow and hits the crossbar at first, but soon it becomes a breakaway goal scoring opportunity. (hockey cliches as metaphors for this read.)
January 14, 2021
Need to call this out for what it is: another wise parent with “special knowledge” knowing more about his child’s coaches and his child succeeding despite these other folks.
Although he readily admits to the insanity of hockey parents, I am curious as to his self-examination of his participation in this insanity, including texting and communicating with other parents as to other players’ shortcomings… of 11 and 12-year-olds. The foible for this omniscient parent is the coaches, but it will be the teachers/professors later in life.
It reminds me of an old coaching quote: children tend to succeed despite their parents.
Although he readily admits to the insanity of hockey parents, I am curious as to his self-examination of his participation in this insanity, including texting and communicating with other parents as to other players’ shortcomings… of 11 and 12-year-olds. The foible for this omniscient parent is the coaches, but it will be the teachers/professors later in life.
It reminds me of an old coaching quote: children tend to succeed despite their parents.
March 24, 2021
This just might be the funniest book I’ve come across. An hilarious, but true, look at youth sports, in this case, hockey. Rich tells it like it is; capturing all of the parent cliques, parent coaches follies, politics, pre-arranged tryouts etc. Absolutely historical without trying to be a book of humor.
December 20, 2021
I was a hockey mom for 10 years. Not only is this recounting of one season of PeeWee hockey relatable, I'm pretty sure the author must have been hiding in our back seat on some of those long rides home because he's telling OUR stories and they are spot on.
November 7, 2020
Gets the cold hard essence of the thing. And funny as hell. Great book for any and all sports moms and dads and aunts and uncles and cousins.
January 25, 2021
I enjoyed reading the book from start to finish. As a hockey dad, I could certainly relate to what was going on in the book. I haven't experienced some of the parental stuff, but I have definitely heard of it!!
August 20, 2021
As a hockey parent I'm often baffled by the intensity of some of the other parents. They get so worked up over a kids sport - sometimes resorting to extremes like violence...no joke.
I love 'confessionals' like this. A chance to learn what goes on in the mind of those other crazy hockey parents. Maybe a glimpse into why? An explanation for something that seems illogical.
Rich has a kid who is in the competitive world of hockey (although it could be any other sport and still have the same effect). Right from the starting tryouts and the cuts from the upper tier teams, Cohen's narrative is very relatable. It seems like tryouts everywhere are full of politics, social status, and flawed evaluators. After his kid squeaks onto an 'A' team the fun begins. We travel with Rich and his son through a season of ups and downs, and the slow breakdown of a team and Rich himself. As always it starts with the parents. They all think their kid is the best, so when one player is put on the 'top line' or given extra ice time in the last few minutes of a game, then parents start blowing gaskets. It starts with small jabs at the other kids' skills or perceived weaknesses, yes, the ten year olds are being critically evaluated by other parents (that's a healthy environment). Then the parents start criticizing the coach and all his decisions. It's this vicious cycle that seems to be a common thing at all kid's sports leagues nowadays.
In this story the head coach has some personal issues and is away for a good chunk of the season. The back up coaches are parents of some players...they take full advantage of this by playing their kids more. Even changing up the team strategy to help their child look better. Yes, this seems to be common amongst many hockey teams worldwide. This situation leads to Rich getting so worked up that he has an argument with the coach and has to stop coming to the games and practices.
It's sad really, but like I said it seems very common.
It was a good read for any sports parent out there, not just hockey.
I love 'confessionals' like this. A chance to learn what goes on in the mind of those other crazy hockey parents. Maybe a glimpse into why? An explanation for something that seems illogical.
Rich has a kid who is in the competitive world of hockey (although it could be any other sport and still have the same effect). Right from the starting tryouts and the cuts from the upper tier teams, Cohen's narrative is very relatable. It seems like tryouts everywhere are full of politics, social status, and flawed evaluators. After his kid squeaks onto an 'A' team the fun begins. We travel with Rich and his son through a season of ups and downs, and the slow breakdown of a team and Rich himself. As always it starts with the parents. They all think their kid is the best, so when one player is put on the 'top line' or given extra ice time in the last few minutes of a game, then parents start blowing gaskets. It starts with small jabs at the other kids' skills or perceived weaknesses, yes, the ten year olds are being critically evaluated by other parents (that's a healthy environment). Then the parents start criticizing the coach and all his decisions. It's this vicious cycle that seems to be a common thing at all kid's sports leagues nowadays.
In this story the head coach has some personal issues and is away for a good chunk of the season. The back up coaches are parents of some players...they take full advantage of this by playing their kids more. Even changing up the team strategy to help their child look better. Yes, this seems to be common amongst many hockey teams worldwide. This situation leads to Rich getting so worked up that he has an argument with the coach and has to stop coming to the games and practices.
It's sad really, but like I said it seems very common.
It was a good read for any sports parent out there, not just hockey.
April 8, 2021
Comparison is the thief of joy: I was disappointed by this book because I loved Rich Cohen's pre-book-release WSJ article about his and his son's experiences playing hockey. Unlike the WSJ article, this book focuses less on a love of the game and its fond memories and lessons in favor of a cynical critique of the behaviors of coaches and parents.
Even then, the author's disgust for certain hockey parents causes him to sometimes lose track of his theme of parental overinvolvement; this becomes a book about Rich Cohen versus an evil parent-coach instead of a broader, more self-reflective discussion of how hockey parents' behaviors affected their children. The author has a chip on his shoulder and never completely acknowledges that he is a large part of the problem.
Still, I think this book is an accurate depiction of hockey parents. I played hockey in a region that was less interested in hockey and possibly more relaxed than the East Coast in terms of parental ambition, and some parents were still just plain nuts.
Another thing I appreciated: the author acknowledges the widespread participation and contribution from girls to co-ed youth hockey teams. As a girl who played co-ed youth hockey, hockey is a great sport that is well-suited to co-ed teams, and we should remember that girls love hockey too.
Even then, the author's disgust for certain hockey parents causes him to sometimes lose track of his theme of parental overinvolvement; this becomes a book about Rich Cohen versus an evil parent-coach instead of a broader, more self-reflective discussion of how hockey parents' behaviors affected their children. The author has a chip on his shoulder and never completely acknowledges that he is a large part of the problem.
Still, I think this book is an accurate depiction of hockey parents. I played hockey in a region that was less interested in hockey and possibly more relaxed than the East Coast in terms of parental ambition, and some parents were still just plain nuts.
Another thing I appreciated: the author acknowledges the widespread participation and contribution from girls to co-ed youth hockey teams. As a girl who played co-ed youth hockey, hockey is a great sport that is well-suited to co-ed teams, and we should remember that girls love hockey too.
March 11, 2021
I've coached American Football at all levels short of the NFL. The majority of those years were spent coaching Pee Wee-aged youth. Without question, the most challenging years came coaching 10-year-olds the game.
Rich Cohen sharing his experience as a father of a Pee Wee-aged hockey player brought back memories of my years with those youngsters. Most of them good but a few stories are examples of what is wrong with the young sports model.
Politics and youth sports bring out the worst in adults.
Rich Cohen sharing his experience as a father of a Pee Wee-aged hockey player brought back memories of my years with those youngsters. Most of them good but a few stories are examples of what is wrong with the young sports model.
Politics and youth sports bring out the worst in adults.
June 28, 2021
Rich Cohen details a standard hockey season for his son, Micah’s peewee hockey team (ages 11/12). At the beginning of the book he describes a pre-season coach/parent meeting where the coach asks the parents to rank the importance of each aspect of a hockey season: winning, fitness, learning to play hickey, learning to appreciate hockey, teamwork, fun, self-confidence, and memories. The coach then provides feedback to the parents on how winning is not the primary goal for engagement in youth sports, clearly. It’s so much more than that. The irony is Rich Cohen authoring a book about a youth hockey team and then proceeding to denigrate 11/12 year olds for over 150 pages. While what he shares is the unfortunate reality of youth hockey in many places - gossiping parents, badmouthing kid’s athletic performance, ulterior motives of parent coaches, yelling at officials, and uplifting “winning” as the only option - it is extremely unfortunate that the author doesn’t rise above these insidious qualities and try to bring hockey back to its roots of passion, sportsmanship, and teamwork. As a hockey participant (player, ref, coach) of over 28 years, I was excited to read this story and follow this teams journey; however it left me more confident in my decision to no longer be involved in youth hockey for the reasons described above.
April 30, 2023
So…. My daughter told me about this book after one of the Mom’s on my grandson’s Travel hockey team in Massachusetts, told her about it. The premise sounded interesting as my son grew up in the youth hockey world! I picked up the book, started reading… and couldn’t put it down!
You see, my son grew up playing youth hockey in Connecticut! So not only had he played against Ridgefield, he played against the majority of the teams mentioned! This was almost 20 years ago! He played for the Southern CT Stars from Mite through (?I think Bantam?) until he played at Fairfield Prep in high school and went on to win the CT Division 1 state championship his senior year.
So, without one bit of exaggeration, this book hit home SO MUCH!!! I LOVED IT!
The craziness of the schedule, the comradeship of the kids, the tournaments, the knee hockey, the experiences……. As crazy as it was, I wouldn’t have traded a second of it!
Thanks for this book! The craziness of it having taken place years after our experiences was such a bonus! The drive up the Taconic had me reliving a drive following two other parents, bouncing around in the Suburban and trying not to get a ticket going 85🤦🏻♀️
So spot on!! Loved it!! Literally writing the review as the Rangers are about to take the ice in Game 6. But seriously….. Go Bruins😂😂😂❤️❤️❤️❤️
You see, my son grew up playing youth hockey in Connecticut! So not only had he played against Ridgefield, he played against the majority of the teams mentioned! This was almost 20 years ago! He played for the Southern CT Stars from Mite through (?I think Bantam?) until he played at Fairfield Prep in high school and went on to win the CT Division 1 state championship his senior year.
So, without one bit of exaggeration, this book hit home SO MUCH!!! I LOVED IT!
The craziness of the schedule, the comradeship of the kids, the tournaments, the knee hockey, the experiences……. As crazy as it was, I wouldn’t have traded a second of it!
Thanks for this book! The craziness of it having taken place years after our experiences was such a bonus! The drive up the Taconic had me reliving a drive following two other parents, bouncing around in the Suburban and trying not to get a ticket going 85🤦🏻♀️
So spot on!! Loved it!! Literally writing the review as the Rangers are about to take the ice in Game 6. But seriously….. Go Bruins😂😂😂❤️❤️❤️❤️
March 10, 2022
Although Rich Cohen is an acclaimed best-selling writer and I'm just a neophyte author, we do have something in common--we've both written about our experiences as hockey parents. In his book "Pee Wees: Confessions of a Hockey Parent" and mine ("My Canadian Hockey Journey: Tales from a Career House Leaguer & Retired Hockey Dad"), we explore the trials and tribulations, and all the joys and heartaches, that come with being parents of little pucksters.
However, after reading "Pee Wees" there is one distinct difference between his story and mine--Cohen was much more of a puckhead than I ever was! From being overly critical of some of his son's teammates to confronting coaches about playing time (among other things) to his emotions at the rink causing his blood pressure to skyrocket (which required him to visit a cardiologist), his all-consuming obsession with his kid's peewee hockey season went far beyond my own. Nonetheless, the book is an insightful look at what really goes on within our local arenas and one that I found to be relatable to my own hockey experience. Cohen's "Pee Wees" is well-written (often humorous and, at times, cringeworthy) and an enjoyable read!
However, after reading "Pee Wees" there is one distinct difference between his story and mine--Cohen was much more of a puckhead than I ever was! From being overly critical of some of his son's teammates to confronting coaches about playing time (among other things) to his emotions at the rink causing his blood pressure to skyrocket (which required him to visit a cardiologist), his all-consuming obsession with his kid's peewee hockey season went far beyond my own. Nonetheless, the book is an insightful look at what really goes on within our local arenas and one that I found to be relatable to my own hockey experience. Cohen's "Pee Wees" is well-written (often humorous and, at times, cringeworthy) and an enjoyable read!
February 5, 2021
The names have changed to protect the guilty. I have two kids who play hockey in Fairfield County and have visited the Winter Garden many times. His book is accurate in the craziness of the parents watching youth hockey. It is a roller coaster of emotions every season.
He hits the nail on the head that you follow a team more closely than any professional team that you have rooted for since you were a kid. You intimately know every player's strength and weakness. You analyze every coaching move. You play over the games from the weekend and can not wait for the next weekend of games. It is fascinating.
I thought the book lacked a bit in describing the kids. He tried admirably but it is tough to paint a complex picture of an 11 year old. At the end of the day they are 11. However he does do a good job of illustrating how the children act more like adults than the adults.
Not destined to become a classic like Friday Night Lights but an easy, fun and quick read that all youth sports parents should enjoy.
He hits the nail on the head that you follow a team more closely than any professional team that you have rooted for since you were a kid. You intimately know every player's strength and weakness. You analyze every coaching move. You play over the games from the weekend and can not wait for the next weekend of games. It is fascinating.
I thought the book lacked a bit in describing the kids. He tried admirably but it is tough to paint a complex picture of an 11 year old. At the end of the day they are 11. However he does do a good job of illustrating how the children act more like adults than the adults.
Not destined to become a classic like Friday Night Lights but an easy, fun and quick read that all youth sports parents should enjoy.
April 1, 2023
I'll read anything Cohen writes, even a book about hockey, a sport I've never played or really cared about. I really enjoyed this account of a hockey season for one of Cohen's kids . . . the ups and downs, the arguments with coaches, the frustrations of a parent, and more are all on display. Cohen is a great storyteller and the account of a single season is very entertaining, but also serves as a helpful introspection for his own love of the game and the struggle parents go through with their kids.
All four of my boys played basketball for the first time this year. They have played before, but this time they cared about it - two out of four anyways. I love watching them play but also learned enough about myself this year to know I probably shouldn't coach because I care too much about winning. When you have to stop yourself from cheering when the opponent in a little league game makes a bad play, being more involved might be a bad idea. Really liked this book and how honest Cohen was with the struggles and triumphs of a sports parent.
All four of my boys played basketball for the first time this year. They have played before, but this time they cared about it - two out of four anyways. I love watching them play but also learned enough about myself this year to know I probably shouldn't coach because I care too much about winning. When you have to stop yourself from cheering when the opponent in a little league game makes a bad play, being more involved might be a bad idea. Really liked this book and how honest Cohen was with the struggles and triumphs of a sports parent.
March 13, 2021
This brilliantly and funny written book perfectly captures the experiences of a season of youth hockey. While reading the book, I felt transported back to my own son's peewee season. Although I am a hockey dad in Switzerland and Rich Cohen's narrative takes place in the US, I had numerous déjà vues.
Cohen's pictorial and vivid writing style makes a movie run in the reader's head. This makes you not want to put the book down.
For all parents entering the world of sports, whether ice hockey, football, soccer, etc., with their still young children, this book is a perfect preparation for what to expect.
For those parents for whom this intense time has already passed, it is reassuring to learn that other youth teams - even in other places in the world - have similar goings-on, parents act similarly crazy and obsessive, coaches have the same characteristics, players behave similarly, and the coffee at ice rinks is equally bad.
Cohen's pictorial and vivid writing style makes a movie run in the reader's head. This makes you not want to put the book down.
For all parents entering the world of sports, whether ice hockey, football, soccer, etc., with their still young children, this book is a perfect preparation for what to expect.
For those parents for whom this intense time has already passed, it is reassuring to learn that other youth teams - even in other places in the world - have similar goings-on, parents act similarly crazy and obsessive, coaches have the same characteristics, players behave similarly, and the coffee at ice rinks is equally bad.
March 1, 2021
RC's experience as a hockey dad completely mirrored my own. My daughter was the highest goal scorer on the team at one point in the season and the hockey coach parent put her on defense I'm thinking because she couldn't skate backwards it allowed his daughter to completely dominate all the shifts on the ice. The high price of hockey makes parents ballistic when situations like this occur.
I loved the author's writing of the whole experience: the sleepless nights, a quick prayer for a shot to go in, the not so much caring for the other kid's activities, etc.
I take pride that we stepped away emotionally, didn't even attend her last state tournament because of a preplanned vacation. It's something we laugh about now. And the few times I've gone to her adult games, I make sure I have a paper to read with me and barely look up. Wish I had that attitude back in the day. GREAT BOOK!
I loved the author's writing of the whole experience: the sleepless nights, a quick prayer for a shot to go in, the not so much caring for the other kid's activities, etc.
I take pride that we stepped away emotionally, didn't even attend her last state tournament because of a preplanned vacation. It's something we laugh about now. And the few times I've gone to her adult games, I make sure I have a paper to read with me and barely look up. Wish I had that attitude back in the day. GREAT BOOK!
August 12, 2021
Why in the world should I care about Rich Cohen’s kid’s pee wee hockey team? Listening to other parents talk about their kids’ teams is like listening to someone describe their dreams. Inherently uninteresting.
But not, apparently, when you’re in the hands of a great writer. Cohen can write about anything so I jumped in this book on faith that he’s being this world to life, and he didn’t disappoint.
By the end of this book, you’ll know all the players, some of the parents, the myopic parents-coaches (I have several. nightmare stories from my now-adult son’s time on travel team baseball that tracked Cohen’s to a frightening degree), and be fully invested in the team’s up-and-down season.
This is a quick, engaging, wonderfully-written read. I might draw the line if Cohen writes next about his dreams, but probably not.
But not, apparently, when you’re in the hands of a great writer. Cohen can write about anything so I jumped in this book on faith that he’s being this world to life, and he didn’t disappoint.
By the end of this book, you’ll know all the players, some of the parents, the myopic parents-coaches (I have several. nightmare stories from my now-adult son’s time on travel team baseball that tracked Cohen’s to a frightening degree), and be fully invested in the team’s up-and-down season.
This is a quick, engaging, wonderfully-written read. I might draw the line if Cohen writes next about his dreams, but probably not.
April 19, 2022
I think any parent with a kid in a sport should read this book. Perhaps I found this book funnier than most since we are not ice hockey parents. But, there were times I couldn't stop laughing (the mom with her third beer of the day cheersing the glass.) Describing
Rich Cohen hit the nail on the head when he points out that 20 years ago...coaches kid was the kid with less play time. If a kid is playing right field and batting last, years ago he was likely to be the coach's kid. But now it's just the opposite.
The story telling behind the weeks of tryouts with parents acting like CIA agents is hilarious! I wish I had read this earlier to understand why everyone is always so secretive....and I'm failing as a parent with not holding back on which team we would want our kids on.
Great read! Highly recommend.
Rich Cohen hit the nail on the head when he points out that 20 years ago...coaches kid was the kid with less play time. If a kid is playing right field and batting last, years ago he was likely to be the coach's kid. But now it's just the opposite.
The story telling behind the weeks of tryouts with parents acting like CIA agents is hilarious! I wish I had read this earlier to understand why everyone is always so secretive....and I'm failing as a parent with not holding back on which team we would want our kids on.
Great read! Highly recommend.
November 7, 2020
A quick, easy and enjoyable read that will ring true to anyone who has been involved in youth sports, whether parent, coach or player. Rich Cohen is a hockey dad who cares a lot about his son's team -- maybe, like so many parents, too much. In fact, he had to take time off from the game for a while to protect his health and sanity. Sitting in the bleachers watching your kids play hockey is stressful, just as much as standing on the sidelines of a youth soccer match or a youth lacrosse game. Cohen's frequent references to Chicago sports teams is a bit odd, considering the book takes place in Connecticut, but his memories about playing hockey as a boy in the Chicago area are nicely handled. All in all, a fun journey through one season of youth hockey.
February 3, 2021
"Pee Wees" is a great book and should probably be required reading for any parent whose kid is involved in any sort of competitive activity - hockey, dance, debate. He brings to life an entire season in the lives of these kids and their parents, from the tryouts through the state tournament.
You see everything from the joys and sorrows of the kids to the petty behaviors of the parents (parents of kids on the Double AA team shunning Single A parents) and coaches. You become invested in a team of 11 year olds not your own and that's the sign of a very talented writer.
I've been a fan of his for years, and would also recommend "Sweet and Low," "The Fish that Ate the Whale" and "Record Men." But pick this one up. It's worth the time.
You see everything from the joys and sorrows of the kids to the petty behaviors of the parents (parents of kids on the Double AA team shunning Single A parents) and coaches. You become invested in a team of 11 year olds not your own and that's the sign of a very talented writer.
I've been a fan of his for years, and would also recommend "Sweet and Low," "The Fish that Ate the Whale" and "Record Men." But pick this one up. It's worth the time.
April 25, 2022
I have a son who has played hockey since he was 5, he's now 14. I couldn't believe how spot on this book is. The cliques, the anxiety during try outs, knowing most of the team is already picked before anyone even touches the ice.
I'm sure all youth sports have a little bit of crazy parents involved, but hockey is like no other I've witnessed. Parents that you feel like are your bffs one month, don't talk to you the next because your kid has been regulated to the lower team. Then when the next season starts, they are back to being your bff because you are back on "their" team.
I highly recommend this book for anyone who is either a youth hockey parent, thinking about becoming one or are just curious about those crazy hockey parents.
I'm sure all youth sports have a little bit of crazy parents involved, but hockey is like no other I've witnessed. Parents that you feel like are your bffs one month, don't talk to you the next because your kid has been regulated to the lower team. Then when the next season starts, they are back to being your bff because you are back on "their" team.
I highly recommend this book for anyone who is either a youth hockey parent, thinking about becoming one or are just curious about those crazy hockey parents.
February 18, 2021
I am a hockey dad and a parent coach. Cohen gives a good window into how crazy hockey families are. He is right that some coaches favor their kids and others are extra hard on their own kids. I often times find it hard to be in the stands with the other parents. However in attending 100s of games I've only rarely witnessed the parents of opposing teams interacting together. Cohen seems to imply that most parents are horrible sports. Maybe the games are more friendly in the Midwest. Although I enjoyed the book I kind of felt like this could have been condensed into a magazine article instead of a full novel.
February 19, 2021
I am a hockey mom from a hockey family. I have three kids and they all play. Although I can relate to every parent and coach he writes about, it annoyed me how horrible a hockey parent he is/was. Going after one of the coaches because he didn't think his son got enough play time and constantly questioning each decision made shows how the game is about him and not his son or his sons team.
As relatable as this book is to me me and I am sure many other hockey parents, I felt horrible for the what this mans son had to deal with and will continue to deal with for the rest of his youth sport career and beyond.
As relatable as this book is to me me and I am sure many other hockey parents, I felt horrible for the what this mans son had to deal with and will continue to deal with for the rest of his youth sport career and beyond.
March 20, 2021
This is not a feel good book about father and son bonding over their shared love of hockey. It’s also not about all the wonderful lessons each learned from sports like being part of a team. It’s about how ugly and stressful and political organized sports can be, how they become all about winning, how parent coaches favor their own kids. Seems like the kids would have had more fun without adults in the way. I guess this is a more realistic version of what it’s like to be a hockey parent. But I’d rather have read about the conversations they had about God on their drive home.
Hope Broadway Jenny isn’t scarred for life by her insane coach dad, who will probably never see that he was wrong.
Hope Broadway Jenny isn’t scarred for life by her insane coach dad, who will probably never see that he was wrong.
April 3, 2021
Having played PeeWee hockey 🏒 in my youth, some of this book brings back memories. The cold, early Saturday morning practices in the dark, late December air. The joyful team breakfasts at Denny's. The frostbitten toes and soaking in the bathtub, trying to regain feeling and generally warm back up. I hated it.
I was never any good, I had weak ankles and no hockey skills to speak of. I had no 'edge'. I did enjoy this book very much though. I don't remember the obnoxious parents, perhaps they're a product of the last few decades. But this book is a fun, quick read. Enjoy it and don't take life to seriously.😜😜😜
I was never any good, I had weak ankles and no hockey skills to speak of. I had no 'edge'. I did enjoy this book very much though. I don't remember the obnoxious parents, perhaps they're a product of the last few decades. But this book is a fun, quick read. Enjoy it and don't take life to seriously.😜😜😜
October 18, 2022
It's well-written and captures the insanity of parents involved with youth hockey, although it egregiously ignores discussing the unrelenting abuse showered on referees and the effect that it has. The author seems only vaguely aware that he's indeed one of the worst of those he holds up tot he light, someone who ignores safeguards put in place to give coaches breathing room because HIS opinion is too important to wait 24 hours. It's also bracing to watch him dance along the edge of ruining the game for his son by not letting him play for the joy of the game. It's a decent read but also infuriating at the same time to watch him wave away his self-awareness that's he's part of the problem.
August 17, 2025
A friend whose daughter has been playing hockey since she was a little girl recommended this book to me, the mother of a son who started as a second year squirt who is moving from a 10UB team to a 12UA team after one year of play. Man, does Cohen have his finger on the pulse of the experience and only a hockey parent can understand it this well. What a joy to read. What a joy to watch our kids play. A beautiful ode to the greatest game on earth and the little kids that give their hearts to it. Highly recommend to any parents in the thick of it, freezing their asses off and wondering why they're having a panic attack every game. Thank you, Mr. Cohen, for putting it into words so perfectly.
January 28, 2021
One year in the life of a PeeWee hockey father in Ridgefield, CT, his point of view of the season of his son’s PeeWee A team, cold steel on ice. There are moments of joy and humor that all youth hockey players and parents will appreciate, but
perhaps the author should have listened a little more to his own dad’s advice, Care, but not too much. This was a fun little glimpse into the world of youth hockey, not to be taken too seriously, after all, it is just a game, a game the kids play, just for fun.
perhaps the author should have listened a little more to his own dad’s advice, Care, but not too much. This was a fun little glimpse into the world of youth hockey, not to be taken too seriously, after all, it is just a game, a game the kids play, just for fun.
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