Bent Not Broken

by Z. Allora

Stefano Rossi longs for the mystical—and so far unattainable—peace of reaching subspace. But can he accept that the person who can take him there is a man?

Riku Tao has given up on finding a sub who complements him. He’ll stick with doing demonstrations at the BDSM club the Edge. He certainly doesn’t have time for a closeted Catholic guy with internalized biphobia… and yet he cannot help but want to protect Stefano and give him what he needs. A history of physical and sexual abuse makes it impossible for Stefano to come out of the closet, and Riku certainly isn’t going back in.

Perhaps an arrangement of six months to explore their desires will be enough to satisfy them both.

Or it might break their hearts.

To take hold of his future with the man he’s coming to love, Stefano will need to move beyond the pain of his past, and he won’t be able to do it alone.

Genres: BDSM, M M Romance, Romance, Contemporary

251 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 16, 2020

About the author

Z. believes in soul mates, love at first sight, and overcoming all odds to find happily ever afters. Born in Upstate NY, Z. Allora and partner have spent the last fifteen years together traveling across the United States, the Middle East and Asia. These travels provide the inspiration behind many of the detailed settings and characters throughout Z.'s work. Z. received a Master degree in Psychology and Bachelor degrees in both English and Philosophy. (though Z's editors would probably question the English degree). Z. is both a writer and a huge fan of M/M romance as well as Yaoi. It is said the pen is mightier than the sword. Z. thinks all writers and publishers of M/M are promoting equality, since everyone deserves a happily ever after.

Reviews

[Xanthe · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bent not broken actually started as a three star read for me as it took until about 20% in until I started to enjoy the story. I didn't really feel a connection with the characters until they started connecting with each other.
My heart broke for Stefano as it's clear that he suffered through some trauma in his childhood which was then made worse by the reaction of his father. All of that has meant that his attraction to men has been a closely guarded secret until he meets Riko, an older man doing a BDSM demonstration at the local club. Riko is lonely but not looking for anyone, at least he wasn't until meeting Stefano who he notices straight away.
They both feel something instantly but Riko is out and proud of who he is so struggles to accept being with someone who isn't. A compromise means that Riko can help Stefano reach the subspace he's been searching for whilst he works on accepting himself and who he really wants. Riko opens Stefano up to the possibilities of what he could experience with another man, a dom who can let him explore his submission. He works hard to show Stefano his worth and strength but it is always the survivor's choice to accept themselves and what happened, allowing themselves to move forward in life.
The timeline of the story is done well as it pauses to focus on the important moments of their relationship, Stefano's journey and on interactions with family. Stefano's family is Italian and grew up Catholic, though his sister and brother have moved to a more open church. They are openly supportive of all communities and it's good to see that support for Stefano, even before they knew he needed it, and standing up to his other brother who is quite the homophobe, taking after their father. Riku's best friend, Devon, is a good source of support with his friendship, always wanting the best for his friend but knowing he'll follow his heart, and also a part of the BDSM community. It was also lovely to have a small interaction with Riku's parents showing how they came through opposition to be together but still continuing to celebrate their heritages.
This is a well written story, allowing two men to become a part of a relationship that is good for them both but also giving Stefano the time that he needed to heal in his own way. My favourite quote is "Life may have bent you a little but you are not broken". It is so true for so many of us and one of several reasons as to why I recommend giving this story a go.
I received an ARC from the Paranormal Romance Guild and am happily giving a review.

[JustJen "Miss Conduct" · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 stars - This was an interesting storyline that grabbed my attention. Stefano is a deeply closeted guy put there mainly by religion. He has the added self-shame of BDSM and seeks out Mistresses who never seem to want to commit, although he isn’t exactly looking for one either. He knows he is missing something and that the various Mistresses have just not been able to give him what he needs – he has never been able to achieve subspace, for example. He is intrigued by Dom, Riku Tao, who gives demonstrations at the club.

Riko is someone who has never been able to find the right person to fit his wants. So, he basically gave up and chooses to not get involved beyond giving demonstrations and schooling others on safe BDSM practices. He sees Stefano and is intrigued. It isn’t until Stefano shows up at the offices where Riko practices that they are actually thrown in each other’s paths. Riko sees that Stefano is struggling with a good number of things, not the least of which is his self-induced shame and closetedness. But, he wants to help. Stefano knows he needs the help and isn’t too hard to convince that Riko can give him what he needs without sexuality being involved. Of course, it all works out because Riko works magic and shows Stefano a different view.

I had a hard time warming up to these characters, and that didn’t really change much when they were together. I did find the story interesting, especially Stefano and his background and struggles. There were some areas that I felt could have been expanded a bit more or scenes shown (i.e. we got to see Stefano meet Riko’s family, but not vice versa, which seemed to be the more important or most controversial of the two). I loved that Stefano had supportive family members to counter the bad ones and even some that came around when eyes were opened.

There may be some triggers in this one – the past abuse by religious figures, family abuse and homophobia related thereto. All in all, I enjoyed this but I wasn’t blown away.


Review written for Love Bytes Reviews.

[Librarian Kate · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ah, the "Sad Sub rescued from his life of Sad by his Fairy Domfather, who swoops in and spanks him ALL better (because ALL Sad Subs are pain sluts, right?)" stories are some of my absolute favorites, but this one puts a unique and fascinating twist on the Better Living Through Bondage trope. For one thing, Stefano has fought his way through life trying to overcome the damage from emotional and physical abuse he experienced in his past -- he's a pro at enduring pain; what he can't deal with is accepting kindness. Riku is willing to do demos at the clubs, but he's looking for deeper meaning in the BDSM life than the 'beat me harder, I can take it' subs he gets to work with.

One of the things that blew me away about this book was the exploration of a Dom's ability to CARE for his Sub, and how a simple relaxation ritual can be as powerful in getting to subspace as any Saint Andrew's Cross. Both men are wary of getting too emotionally invested in a relationship that they don't feel worthy of, and the six-month trial seems like the right approach. But the road to their HEA goes through some difficult decisions and personal growth before they are ready to admit they both have something worth offering in a relationship.

And I LOVE the word play in the title; 'bent' is often used to mean 'kinky' so the BDSM element is referenced, and it fits perfectly with the idea that the characters stuggle to accept that their lives have been damaged and pushed out of shape by things they couldn't control, but THEY are not broken.

And OMG -- the cover!! Don't know how the artist pulled it off, but they NAILED it. Cover Dude is spot on for Stefano right down to the expression on his face.

[Leslie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Quickie review: for people actually in the scene, surprise! This one is good! A little preachy, which I’ve come to expect from accurate depictions of bdsm. Because you’ve got a mountain of misinformation out there to compensate for!

Also bonus! my personal pet peeve of always mentioning “topping from the bottom” was only mentioned once.

I really enjoyed the novel, and as a complete rope slut I have to say how much I appreciate that aspect of the story.

I try not to get hung up on awkward writing, but the BDSM, queer, and abuse/therapy vocabulary lessons got kinda old. I’m happy someone is taking the time to educate others during and erotic gay romance novel, but I’m not convinced they are absolutely necessary in this context. Shrug. Maybe I’ve been queer, kinky, and in therapy for so long that I over estimate other’s knowledge! Lol

Nonetheless this book gets all the stars for its bliss inducing kink scenes mixed with laughter, it’s gentle handling of assault and abuse survivors experience, and the actual SANE handling of the healing process in a fictional context. I love it when my fiction doesn’t ask me to abandon all reality. Thank you!

[Karen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very moving and inspiring OFY romance with incredibly well-rounded main characters. High on hurt/comfort and genuine emotions, very nuanced story-telling. Riku and Stefano both need the connection and love they find with each other, but it’s not an easy road to happiness. Stefano has gone through so much when he was younger, and it still haunts him to the present day, preventing him from being happy or being able to truly connect with others. It was heartbreaking to read his story, so much raw pain... When he finds Riku and is almost astonished at being treated with gentleness and care… that just touched me so deeply. Riku is an amazing character. As I read this, I got incredibly invested into the well-being of Stefano and Riku both. Stefano struggles to accept himself for who he is, in more than one way, but seeing him get to a better place, step by small step, was wonderful. I loved that Stefano found it within himself to reach out for help and to recognize his own strength and self-worth in the process. Very satisfying HEA. Recommend.

[Zeoanne · Rating 4 out of 5]

Stefano lives an unsatisfied life with a head filled with the voices of prejudice and hatred from his Italian/catholic family including a homophobic brother. At least his other siblings have joined another all-inclusive church and accept him as he is.
Riku is a man who gives subs care and comfort at the end of a scene but has never found 'The One' he'd want to spend a life with. Until he meets Stefano. While Stefano considers himself hetero, he eventually finds comfort at the hands of Riku who asked him for a trial of 6 months to be his sub. A strong friendship develops until Stefano admits his feelings for the other man are natural and true.
As with every Z Allora book I've read, this one is yet as entertaining as the others. Well written and entertaining.

[Gail · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is my second book by this author. I love her story basis, MCs, backstories, plots, but find her writing somewhat amateurish and preachy. So disappointing.

[Cainael - Queen of DNF]

Dnf 11%

[Lois - Who Reads · Rating 4 out of 5]

Poor Stefano is hiding from everyone, including himself. His horrific childhood has left him a very confused and hurt man. There is something about Riku that brings out wants in Stefano that he was not aware he had and he is very unsure how to handle. Riku’s ideal sub has never appeared, until he finds Stefano and he is terrified that they won’t be able to make it work. The path for these two men was not easy, but with Riku’s help, Stefano is able to do the work so that they figure out a way to make a healthy relationship for them. Frank and Angie are amazing siblings, and they definitely knew more about Stefano then he thought they knew.

[L. · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was okay and it dealt with some interesting topics, but I was never able to get properly invested in the story. Maybe it was because the writing style wasn’t my favorite, though I also felt like some things could maybe have been explored a bit more and I just never warmed to the characters. All in all I found this to be a decent read, but nothing extraordinary.

[CB · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loves these MC’s and their story