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Hitomi
"Maybe I could be the world's foremost expert on the smallest things." So begins Nick Jaina's whirlwind first novel Hitomi, about a piano player who just wants to find some quiet time to write about the grandeur in a single speck of dust, but gets pulled on an adventure across the country. Ian moved to New York to write a novel. But a series of unfortunate losses—his car, his housemate, possibly his best friend Robert—have led him to join a band of musicians and tour across the country. As he charts the states of ambiguous grief for his friend, he is falling in equally ambiguous love with Hitomi, who may or may not still be dating the guitarist. Oregon Book Award finalist Nick Jaina writes about doubt and misery in the most rollicking, page-turning way. Can you grieve someone without confirmation of loss? Can you love someone without possessing them? The answer is found in every corner of America. The answer is in the smallest things. “Every page of Hitomi swells with Nick Jaina's warmth, perspicacity and subtle humor. Here is a writer keenly in touch with the human condition, whose characters come to feel, very quickly, like old friends.” –Shanthi Sekaran, author of Lucky Boy
- GenresFiction
330 pages, Paperback
Published January 1, 2020
10 people are currently reading
62 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
April 20, 2020
I think I did a great job writing this book. 🐋
May 19, 2020
Other reviewers have given the author a nod to Kingsolver, Vonnegut and Steinbeck.... but for me, I think Nick Jaina is a brilliant variation of Tom Robbins and Twain. I love the traveling Americana aspects of the novel...a guy in a band on a journey around the country, misadventures, and a missing friend.... but it's also a kind of love story with delicious tension, witty conversation, adventure and grief. When I cracked open this book I read straight through until 2am. There were some quirky dialogues and descriptions that had me laughing out loud late into the night.
February 26, 2021
Recently, I watched a Jim Jarmusch film I hadn’t seen before: Paterson, the story of an ordinary person, a bus driver/poet, in which… not a lot happens. I loved it. I loved it so much I didn’t want to watch or read another story that wasn’t somehow similar: poetic, sweetly humorous, without villains, about regular people living life and finding expression, meaning, and quiet satisfaction in their own creative fashion.
Nick Jaina’s novel, Hitomi, the book I finally chose to pick up some days later, is not Paterson. But it is a book about an ordinary person, a touring musician/writer, in which… not a lot happens. Jaina imbues his story of regular people attempting to live creative lives with more misplaced longing and limboed grief. The satisfactions of a creative life are more realistically entangled with indecision, doubt, and the hard discomfort of sleeping in a van crammed with guitars, amps, drums and a Wurlitzer. Happily, I found it every bit as sweetly humorous as I’d longed for (with an absolute laugh-out-loud moment midway that tickled me all out of proportion).
It is also full of poetry. But a darker poetry, and like the story, more complicated. Being a road novel, Hitomi is not rooted to a singular location, and it is while on the road that one of the darkest aspects is underscored. Some could argue that Hitomi is not quite a story without a villain.
While driving, one of the band members consistently tunes into the drone of a certain talk show host, a host who thrives on knitting misogynistic and racist resentment into his supposedly jocular patter. The band member justifies his obsession as being “good to know what’s out there”, certain his own enlightened leanings make him immune to these rants. But readers and his band mates may not be so convinced.
When I opened this book I hoped I’d find the perfect story for my then present mood, a mood created in part by a work of art. After closing Hitomi, I did not reach for another novel for several days. I found myself wanting instead to stay in the afterglow of this one, wishing I could sit in a café with Daveed, or Hitomi, or Ian, (or—most especially—Robert). I was in another mood infused by a different, but every bit as affecting, work of art.
Early on in their road trip, the band members visit the Kurt Vonnegut Memorial Museum. Written on a wall is the quote: “We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be.”
We are, each of us, affected by what we read, what we listen to, what we watch. We can choose works of literature, historical scholarship, spiritual memoirs, nature travelogues… the range and the choices are endless. We can choose even toxic radio show hosts. What we can’t claim to be—and what Jaina knows—is completely immune to their effects.
Nick Jaina’s novel, Hitomi, the book I finally chose to pick up some days later, is not Paterson. But it is a book about an ordinary person, a touring musician/writer, in which… not a lot happens. Jaina imbues his story of regular people attempting to live creative lives with more misplaced longing and limboed grief. The satisfactions of a creative life are more realistically entangled with indecision, doubt, and the hard discomfort of sleeping in a van crammed with guitars, amps, drums and a Wurlitzer. Happily, I found it every bit as sweetly humorous as I’d longed for (with an absolute laugh-out-loud moment midway that tickled me all out of proportion).
It is also full of poetry. But a darker poetry, and like the story, more complicated. Being a road novel, Hitomi is not rooted to a singular location, and it is while on the road that one of the darkest aspects is underscored. Some could argue that Hitomi is not quite a story without a villain.
While driving, one of the band members consistently tunes into the drone of a certain talk show host, a host who thrives on knitting misogynistic and racist resentment into his supposedly jocular patter. The band member justifies his obsession as being “good to know what’s out there”, certain his own enlightened leanings make him immune to these rants. But readers and his band mates may not be so convinced.
When I opened this book I hoped I’d find the perfect story for my then present mood, a mood created in part by a work of art. After closing Hitomi, I did not reach for another novel for several days. I found myself wanting instead to stay in the afterglow of this one, wishing I could sit in a café with Daveed, or Hitomi, or Ian, (or—most especially—Robert). I was in another mood infused by a different, but every bit as affecting, work of art.
Early on in their road trip, the band members visit the Kurt Vonnegut Memorial Museum. Written on a wall is the quote: “We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be.”
We are, each of us, affected by what we read, what we listen to, what we watch. We can choose works of literature, historical scholarship, spiritual memoirs, nature travelogues… the range and the choices are endless. We can choose even toxic radio show hosts. What we can’t claim to be—and what Jaina knows—is completely immune to their effects.
April 29, 2020
I wholeheartedly recommend this book.
I soaked this book up like a good sad song, on repeat... for 12 hours.
I am a melancholy junkie. I search out books that dance long that lovely wiggle of the human experience. There is authenticity in that wiggle. It's the stuff that tethers joy to ennui, hope to loss, the giddiness of potentially holding what you love to the knowledge that you are doomed to drop it and watch it shatter, or more painfully, watching it thrive without you. Ouch right?
Sigh* I wish I had had this book in college.
I soaked this book up like a good sad song, on repeat... for 12 hours.
I am a melancholy junkie. I search out books that dance long that lovely wiggle of the human experience. There is authenticity in that wiggle. It's the stuff that tethers joy to ennui, hope to loss, the giddiness of potentially holding what you love to the knowledge that you are doomed to drop it and watch it shatter, or more painfully, watching it thrive without you. Ouch right?
Sigh* I wish I had had this book in college.
April 29, 2020
This book opened doors inside of me. I just finished reading... the time implied by 'just' being one festooned with many layered events; global, national, and personal. To me, this book is about all those layers, and about the process of reconciling our position in that towering storm. Reconciling through poetry. Reconciling even though you might find that you resist reconciling. Through this reconciliation, small things become more visible. Knowing them doesn't explain away the chaos of existence, but it might help one be ok with the mystery of it all.
Thanks for this wonderful novel.
Thanks for this wonderful novel.
April 29, 2020
Nick Jaina’s “Hitomi” is a true fiction with characters I genuinely miss now that I’ve torn through to the last poetic, funny, longing-filled page.
The book is a road trip, song and poem. Danceable. The wisdom dance around the absurdity fire. The absurdity dance around the wisdom fire.
The book is a road trip, song and poem. Danceable. The wisdom dance around the absurdity fire. The absurdity dance around the wisdom fire.
April 13, 2020
Exquisite. Once I started reading, I could not stop. The style and thoughtfulness of the writing and characters transported me... gave me the feeling of intimate connection, and yet a yearning to feel closer to those who will always be so close, and yet so far away.
April 25, 2020
This book is such a pleasure to read. It’s a story of grief and of love unlike any I’ve read, but like I’ve ever felt and didn’t know how to articulate, or even make sense of. Would definitely recommend.
May 5, 2020
One of the most introspective and empathetic books I've read in a long time. At times I felt like some things didn't quite make sense, but the book still succeeded at staying cohesive and entertaining.
May 27, 2020
I was locked up in the house to social distance, but I got to go on a wistful, thoughtful journey through the United States. 88 bite-sized chapters, the same number as keys on a piano, tell the easy-to-love tale of showing love through poems, word games, and text-messages when it can't just be expressed any other way.
December 26, 2022
I read 73 books this year. This was the best book I read this year. You should read it.
August 27, 2025
What an amazing read. A cross between poetry and prose and Moby Dick, somehow. I agree with Ian. They should have called it Ahab.
Favorite passages:
“How did Schrödinger handle it, with his cat? Did the not knowing tear him up? I know it was a hypothetical cat. But what a brilliant marketing gimmick to put a cat in the equation, to scare us all into caring about quantum mechanics.”
“I called campgrounds around the Midwest, asking if they seen someone like Robert recently.
"A guy with a beautiful chin," I'd say.
"I don't know," they'd say. "You have to be more specific."
"A dreamer," I'd say.”
“My heart (not that we're going to start comparing hearts) was a canyon shaped by the pain of people saying no to me. What canyons did the heart of someone like that contain? Was there a canyon in there? If not, how could anyone else have any room to get inside it?”
“I try to think of what wisdom I can give to the ignorant people causing so much pain. So much of it is what I learned from writ ing this novel: Release yourself from affectations. Believe oppressed people when they say they are in pain. Identify your own invisible privileges. Keep diving deeper to have more empathy for every man, woman, dog, and tree around you. Write letters to those you love and say how you really feel. Keep arranging beautiful words on a page for its own sake. Keep noticing the smallest things. Keep going.”
Favorite passages:
“How did Schrödinger handle it, with his cat? Did the not knowing tear him up? I know it was a hypothetical cat. But what a brilliant marketing gimmick to put a cat in the equation, to scare us all into caring about quantum mechanics.”
“I called campgrounds around the Midwest, asking if they seen someone like Robert recently.
"A guy with a beautiful chin," I'd say.
"I don't know," they'd say. "You have to be more specific."
"A dreamer," I'd say.”
“My heart (not that we're going to start comparing hearts) was a canyon shaped by the pain of people saying no to me. What canyons did the heart of someone like that contain? Was there a canyon in there? If not, how could anyone else have any room to get inside it?”
“I try to think of what wisdom I can give to the ignorant people causing so much pain. So much of it is what I learned from writ ing this novel: Release yourself from affectations. Believe oppressed people when they say they are in pain. Identify your own invisible privileges. Keep diving deeper to have more empathy for every man, woman, dog, and tree around you. Write letters to those you love and say how you really feel. Keep arranging beautiful words on a page for its own sake. Keep noticing the smallest things. Keep going.”
May 26, 2020
Loved it! Nick Jaina grabs you on page one and doesn't let go till the last words. American tour by a no-budget band and a mysterious singer with a Japanese name who's glance sucks in the protagonist. A bit of Haruki Murikami lies beneath the lines like the great white whale swimming beneath the waves. It all works and leaves you hoping Jaina's next novel comes soon.
December 20, 2020
At once hilarious, poetic, and gripping. It's the kind of novel that if I'd read it when I was 21, I would have spent my life trying to make my life more like it. Weirdly enough, I wound up doing that anyway. It's eerily relevant to me personally, but I think anyone who reads it will be moved by it. Inspired prose, delicious characters. So glad it came into my life.
April 7, 2022
Thank you to whoever donated this book to goodwill, I don’t even know how to explain how this book made me feel, maybe like “yeah I understand you”, the way this was written is incredible and relatable and I just kept thinking this is exactly how the thoughts in my brain sound,
“I ruin everything by wanting it too badly”
“I ruin everything by wanting it too badly”
April 24, 2022
This is a novel in journal form, a first person account of a musicians’ road trip playing small gigs all across the United States. Ian, the narrator, is ambivalent about what he’s doing in life, kind of writing a book, kind of working, kind of playing music. But then he loses his lodging and at the same time is invited to join a band and travel around the states. He’s ambivalent about that too until he realizes Hitomi will be on the trip. Who is Hitomi? She’s a muse, a desire, an unreachable, an ineffable. She’s a mystery of desire for Ian except she’s in a relationship with the leader of the band and that means he keeps his desire and attraction quiet, at least to her. But not to us. The book is his journey as a musician in a band, his discovery of his yearning, and his attempt to make sense of it all.
In the meanwhile his best friend has gone missing. He’s not dead, he’s not kidnapped, he’s not anything. He’s just gone. This thread of grief and unknowing weaves its way through Ian’s thoughts, feelings, music and relationships. It’s paralyzes him and at the same time moves him to action. It puts him and his emotions into a limbo that the trip intensifies and repeatedly turns upside down.
If you love the musician’s life, the art of literature, writing and reflection, an honest portrayal of confusion that comes with growth, and a humorous and somewhat eccentric look at the world then you will love this book.
In the meanwhile his best friend has gone missing. He’s not dead, he’s not kidnapped, he’s not anything. He’s just gone. This thread of grief and unknowing weaves its way through Ian’s thoughts, feelings, music and relationships. It’s paralyzes him and at the same time moves him to action. It puts him and his emotions into a limbo that the trip intensifies and repeatedly turns upside down.
If you love the musician’s life, the art of literature, writing and reflection, an honest portrayal of confusion that comes with growth, and a humorous and somewhat eccentric look at the world then you will love this book.
September 30, 2024
Nothing much happens in this book, but thats kind of the beauty of it. The descriptions of places and people are really incredible. Its just, life, kind of? Someone else’s life, not mine, but, still. I liked it.
May 21, 2020
Slowly devoured and will read again, especially the pages I dogearred. Gorgeous inspired writing. Glad I bought a copy.
Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews