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Healing Hearts #2

New Beginnings: Abel's Journey

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Will grieving and recently widowed Abel get a second chance at love?

The death of his husband has torn a gaping hole in Abel’s life. Everything is falling apart. If he doesn’t find his feet again, and soon, he stands to lose his job, his apartment, his degree, and the only family he has left.

No one can understand what he’s going through.

No one except him.

Everything about this connection is wrong. Aren’t there rules about loving your deceased husband’s ex? Abel wants to run far and fast in the other direction.

Why this man of all people?

But sometimes you find help and love where you least expect it.

**Please heed trigger warnings. To view them use the Look Inside feature before purchasing**

300 pages, Kindle Edition

First published May 14, 2017

84 people are currently reading
440 people want to read

About the author

Nicky James

75 books2,237 followers
I live in the small town of Petrolia, Ontario, Canada and I am a mother to a wonderful teenage boy (didn't think those words could be typed together...surprise) and wife to a truly supportive and understanding husband, who thankfully doesn't think I'm crazy.

I have always had two profound dreams in life. To fall back hundreds of years in time and live in a simpler world, not bogged down by technology and to write novels. Since only one of these was a possibility I decided to make the other come alive on paper.
I write mm romance novels that take place in fantastical medieval type settings and love to use the challenges of the times to give my stories and characters life.



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Displaying 1 - 30 of 167 reviews
Profile Image for len ❀ .
391 reviews4,772 followers
July 31, 2023
I read this in one sitting and it was one of the best and worst decisions of my life. It’s exactly 4 AM and I just finished this, which is bad because I didn’t sleep a single minute or hour and have a flight to catch that starts boarding at 5:20 AM, so I will be feeling like an agonized zombie while waiting at the airport.

All worth it.

I love pain <3
Profile Image for Judith.
724 reviews2,941 followers
May 16, 2017
"I think I'm ready for a new beginning."





Firstly,can this be a standalone? Possibly but I would strongly advise reading No Regrets to really understand Abel's story.I would say to anyone that has read No Regrets and is a bit apprehensive about reading this one,don't be.





Abel lost his husband,Landon,six months ago when this book opens and to say he's struggling is an understatement.The Abel here is nothing like the happy go lucky,endearing,pushy character from No Regrets .....
He's struggling with every aspect of his life.His college grades are slipping,he can't concentrate on his job....the only comfort he finds is with alcohol,just to numb the pain and loss.Hard to read at times but his grief was extremely well portrayed.





On a visit back to Landon's home town Abel finds help from someone he would probably have never expected to get close to.The Author did an excellent job in the development of these two men's relationship.Nothing is rushed or forced and while their story definitely isn't easy,it develops at just the right pace.....to me,it felt totally credible and their shared connection to Landon was both beautiful and heart breaking.


As the story progresses we gradually see Abel emerging from his grief and allowing himself to feel love again.I definitely shed tears at the end but it was just perfect.This book,along with No Regrets are the only books I've read by Nicky James and I found her writing just captivating.


It's sad,uplifting,hopeful,and very special and definitely one of my top reads this year.


An Arc of New Beginnings was kindly provided to me by Nicky James for an honest review.



This review has been posted on Dirty Books Obsession

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Profile Image for ~✡~Dαni(ela) ♥ ♂♂ love & semi-colons~✡~.
3,574 reviews1,112 followers
May 24, 2018
~4.5~

I read New Beginnings: Abel's Journey as a standalone, without reading No Regrets, Abel and Landon's story, first. I read friends' reviews of the first book and even asked a friend to "spoil" the story for me, and knew I couldn't hack it. I've lost too many people close to me to cancer.

I picked up New Beginnings knowing it was about the aftermath of Landon's death and Abel grieving for the loss of his husband.

I will never regret reading this book, but it tore me apart. I sobbed so hard, I scared my kids.

During the first part of the story entitled Falling, Abel was a self-destructive mess. He used alcohol to numb the pain. He failed all his classes, lost his job, and stole money from his brother. This rock-bottom behavior was incredibly hard to witness.

It wasn't until nearly 70 percent (part two, entitled Rising) that Abel let Kieran be his rock. Kieran was Landon's high school boyfriend and understood Abel's grief.

I can't say enough about Kieran's kindness. He saved Abel's life, and the relationship that bloomed between him and Abel in no way diminished Abel's love for Landon.

New Beginnings is mostly about grief, but it's also about love, old and new.

The romance didn't come until about 80 percent, but that was absolutely necessary. By the time Kieran and Abel connected, I was entirely invested in their relationship. Kieran saw Abel at his worst and stood by him every step of the way.

This is a heartbreaking, beautiful story. Definitely have tissues handy when you read it.
Profile Image for Jaime.
1,801 reviews309 followers
May 4, 2017
Word of warning- if you suffer from anxiety, panic attacks, depression, unresolved grief, have recently lost someone, or have ever had suicidal ideations or lost someone to suicide there are parts of this book that may trigger you. They are written very realistically and I found myself cycling into anxiety as Abel was experiencing each symptom. So, please heed this warning.

***

…I can’t imagine the hurt I’ve left behind. I never wanted to bring you sadness. There was a reason I was so determined to walk this road alone, but you were persistent, weren’t you? As sorry as I am to have brought you this much pain, I’m glad you were there with me every step of the way. I didn’t know how much I needed you, nor how hard it was going to get. Thank you. I always thought I was strong enough, but you proved to me, everyone needs help sometimes, and we shouldn’t be afraid to ask for it…

So begins New Beginnings the sequel to No Regrets by author Nicky James. This book is NOT a standalone and of course it needs to be read after No Regrets. I am relatively new to Nicky James, her first story I read was No Regrets, and that book really had a lasting impression on me. With this second story, I can guarantee you a couple things - you will cry, probably a lot and you will invariably put yourself in one of the characters shoes and wonder, what if that was me? How do I know these things for sure? Well, we are all human and one thing for sure is someday we all will die. It's just a fact of living. Those left behind have to figure out how to go on living once we are gone. We will want our loved ones to be happy, to live, to love. So, reading a book that blatantly puts all of this in our face...it's pretty emotional. Make sure you bring tissue while reading this story.

About the story - this is where we get to follow Abel as he attempts to carry on, in a world minus Landon. The author does not actually make us "see" Landon die and I am grateful for that as it would have totally wrecked me. No, this story starts a few months after Landon passed and we come into Abel's life to find him not coping at all...simply put, he is a mess. A lot has changed in his life not only with losing Landon and he isn't really dealing with it at all.

Circumstances bring Abel in touch with someone else who is grieving Landon's loss, Keiran. I am not going into details, I don't want to give the storyline away -- but, Keiran literally brings Abel back to life and helps him to grieve. This is a unique connection for both of them and we find out more about Keiran. The author wove their tale perfectly.

I am curious now to see if we will get Abel's younger brothers story or if Ms.James is done with these characters. She could potentially keep going with Abel as well but we do get closure for him.

Overall, Abel and Landon teach us all a very important lesson via these two books...

"Would you have done differently, knowing how it would play out?” My eyes darted up. “Not at all. We… we lived the hell out of every moment. You know that. We didn’t let anything stand in our way.”
“Then treasure it. Relive those memories without fear. No regrets, remember? You and my boy made a pact.”
“I remember. No regrets.”


Let nothing stand in your way...live your life...No Regrets

5 stars and I highly recommend these books.


Review Copy of New Beginnings provided by Nicky James for an honest Review.
Profile Image for alyssa.
1,015 reviews213 followers
March 22, 2022
[4.75] *too busy blubbering like a baby* THE NUMBER OF TIMES I CRIED IN THE READING OF THIS BOOK 😭😭😭

i picked this up while still very raw from book 1, because why not pour salt into my open wounds 😌

…I can’t imagine the hurt I’ve left behind. I never wanted to bring you sadness. There was a reason I was so determined to walk this road alone, but you were persistent, weren’t you? As sorry as I am to have brought you this much pain, I’m glad you were there with me every step of the way. I didn’t know how much I needed you, nor how hard it was going to get. Thank you. I always thought I was strong enough, but you proved to me everyone needs help sometimes and we shouldn’t be afraid to ask for it…


divided into two parts (part 1: falling, part 2: rising), the story delves into the aftermath of Landon’s death as Abel spends every moment drowning in an inescapable pit of grief that’s tremendously gutting. jolting. a literal nightmare.

in an interesting twist of fate, his light in this darkness is Kieran, Landon's ex-boyfriend from high school who experiences a similar grief over this loss, and the two grow to share a bond like no other.

there’s something about watching characters on a downward spiral that’s so intensely painful yet perversely enrapturing in some twisted sense of understanding.

this is probably one of the furthest things from an easy read, but it’s undeniably worthwhile of an experience.

my only niggle would have to be Kieran assuming Abel’s position on a particularly important decision (that has to do with Abel, mind you) without any prior discussion with the man in question 🤨 even if it is the next logical step, don’t go making decisions for other people, period!
Profile Image for patrícia.
696 reviews123 followers
April 3, 2025
4.5⭐
I'm a mess… I don’t think I’ve ever cried this much reading a book. This was so raw. Nicky is so talented that I swear I was there, suffering with Abel, feeling all that grief and heartbreak—but also the love. I really didn’t expect how hard this book would hit me… I didn’t even get a chance to properly grieve after No Regrets, and every single mention of Landon just sent me into a full-on sobbing mess. 😭

Tropes
*Widower MC X Husband ex
*Grief & Healing
*Second Chance at Love
*Hurt/Comfort
*Friends to Lovers
*Emotional Angst
*Slow Burn
*Navigating a Past Relationship
*New Beginnings

New Beginnings: Abel’s Journey picks up six months after Abel loses his husband to cancer. He’s drowning in grief—his whole life is falling apart, and nothing feels real without Landon. His job, his schoolwork, even taking care of himself—it’s all slipping away. And then there’s Kieran, Landon’s ex from high school, who knows that same deep, aching loss. Two people who should have been nothing more than a distant footnote in each other’s lives suddenly find themselves tethered by shared sorrow. What starts as a fragile connection built on pain and memories slowly turns into something more—something neither of them expected, something that shouldn’t make sense, but somehow does.

I know this book isn’t for everyone because Landon is everywhere. He’s in every single line, every thought, every moment. But I have no doubt about how much they loved him, and I know Landon would be so proud of this story—he’d be crying and laughing at the same time, rooting for both of them in his own way. 🥺 And I have to make this clear—there was no replacement, no one was substituted. Love doesn’t work that way. Grief doesn’t work that way. Everyone in this story was their own person, existing in the space fate gave them. Landon was never forgotten, never erased. But neither was the love that grew from the wreckage of losing him. This wasn’t about moving on—it was about carrying love forward in a different way.

One of the most beautiful things about this book was how Abel and Kieran found healing in each other by sharing stories about Landon. Those memories—sometimes painful, sometimes funny—became a kind of therapy for them both. Landon wasn’t just a ghost haunting their grief; he was still there, in every laugh, in every tear, in every memory that helped them hold on and move forward at the same time.The renovation they did together worked like a catharsis for both of them.

And yet, from that devastation, something new emerged. It wasn’t the same love they had with Landon, because that love would always exist as it was. This was something different, something reborn from pain, fragile but strong. They didn’t erase the past to build their future—they carried it with them, wings still singed from the fire but learning how to fly again.

In No Regrets, Abel kind of got on my nerves sometimes—he was so pushy, so reactive. But after this book? I know his love for Landon was real. I know. And Kieran? I don’t even have the words… He was exactly what Abel needed, exactly when he needed it. So patient, so steady, always taking care of Abel in a way that was perfect for them—never pushing, never demanding, just being there, holding him up when he was falling apart. Their story is hands down the most beautiful, heartbreaking second chance I’ve ever read.

It doesn’t sugarcoat anything, though. This book hurts. 💔 It’s raw, it’s painful, and it doesn’t shy away from the darkness—self-harm, substance abuse, anxiety, depression. It’s the kind of grief that knocks the wind out of you, that makes you feel like you’ll never stand again. But it’s also about the slow, fragile process of healing, about finding comfort in places you never expected. It’s about knowing that love doesn’t end with death.

Was their friendship weird? Hard to understand and accept? Yeah, maybe. But grief isn’t logical, and love doesn’t follow rules. Sometimes, the only person who truly gets your loss is the one who lost the same person. And sometimes, the people who should make the least sense end up meaning everything.
Was Kieran still in love with Landon in his own way? Probably. But when someone leaves that deep of a mark on your life, does that love ever really go away? Or does it just shift—becoming something different, quieter, but just as real?

I do have Some Observations…
Abel could be an ass at times. Grieving or not, the way he talked to Soren—especially about his job—felt selfish and disrespectful.
I wish their relationship had taken more time to develop—maybe a year or so before they got together. It would’ve made the slow burn even more intense. Once they became intimate, though, the shift felt abrupt—especially for Abel. He went from being consumed by grief to seeming almost unaffected, like a switch had flipped overnight.Their sex dynamic—the alpha dominance struggle—wasn’t my thing, but at least it wasn’t overdone.
I know it’s Abel’s Journey, but I would’ve loved some of Kieran’s POV. It would’ve made the story even stronger.
For me, Nicky always leaves a feeling that something is missing in their incredible books, and this was no exception. I loved it, but in the end, after all those raw emotions, it felt too fast, too simple...

But... I’ll NEVER forget this book. And I will NEVER forget Landon, Abel, and Kieran. 💙

Landon’s parting words to Abel:

“Find love again. Don’t wallow in sadness. I want you to enjoy life. Live for me, Abel.
Profile Image for .Lili. .
1,275 reviews276 followers
May 16, 2017


If you by chance read my incoherent review for No Regrets by Nicky James then you know it devastated me. I was hurt, distraught, angry, and just an emotional mess. I swore I wasn’t going to read New Beginnings. But when I saw the book up on GoodReads I requested it. I had to see it through- I had to see Abel get his HEA. His selflessness and loyalty to Landon demanded I read it. Sometimes characters get under our skin and into our hearts, and they become more than just names and stories in a book. We connect with them. We wonder: what if that was me? Could I be that strong?

New Beginnings takes place six months after Landon’s death. Abel feels lost, and his life is in shambles. He can’t function and can’t sleep without drinking himself into oblivion. Abel hasn’t grieved and has been advised by his doctor to talk about Landon and his feelings so the healing process can begin. Landon doesn’t think he can do it until he runs into Kieran, Landon’s first love, at the cemetery.

I could keep going but then this will turn into a book summary, and I certainly don’t want to spoil this story for you, so I will force myself to stop here.

What I loved:

-Abel and Kieran. I have to say I wasn’t sure how I felt Kieran as the love interest at first but as the story progressed it felt right.

-The pace. This book had a surprisingly quick pace. Sometimes stories that are heavy on the feels tend to have a slower pace, but I didn’t find this the case at all with New Beginnings (nor No Regrets).

-Relationship development- it was perfectly executed. A tentative friendship that grew into more. It felt so natural.

-Angst. This is one of those books that make you say: it hurt so good. Sometimes I love stories that hurt and make me ugly cry and just like its predecessor it made feel and do just that.

-The healing process. Just like Abel’s journey broke my heart it healed it back together.

Can this be read as a standalone? I’m going to say no- though the answer is technically yes. To get the full effect of the story, you have to read them both in order.

As hard and emotional as Abel’s journey was to read it’s one I’m glad I read. It made me think and feel. I highly recommend this beautiful story about healing, love, and new beginnings. I know I’ve done this book no justice with this review- so please give this series a try and experience it for yourself. 5 Stars.

Profile Image for Elsa Bravante.
1,159 reviews196 followers
August 24, 2018
Segundo en la serie, entiendo que para que el viaje junto a Abel sea más real y completo es necesario leer el primer libro, pero para mí el primero de la serie no es un libro de literatura romántica, aunque sea romántico, y no me apetecía nada leerlo para solo conseguir unas horas de sufrimiento.
Dicho esto, me embarqué en el segundo libro. Abel es viudo y toda la primera parte lo que vamos a vivir junto a él es su sufrimiento por la pérdida de la persona amada, algunos momentos son realmente duros y muy muy emotivos. Poco a poco va saliendo de esa desesperación y consigue ver un poco de luz gracias a Kieran, no quiero desvelar más de quién es Kieran y cómo se ayudan mutuamente y se enamoran. Es una historia romántica, con momentos muy tristes y otros con mucha esperanza. Bien escrito y con muchos sentimientos a flor de piel.
Profile Image for Annika.
1,374 reviews94 followers
July 14, 2018
Audiobook review

4,5 heartbreaking stars

If No Regrets terrified me, I don't even have words to describe my level of trepidation going into this book. I knew it was going to be painful. I knew I was going to get my heart ripped out, trampled on, mangled and that I was going to bleed - a lot. But I still had to listen to this story. I needed to know what happened to Abel after losing Landon. I needed to see him happy. So I stocked up on tissues and started listening...

We are thrown into the thick of it, it's been six months since Landon passed and Abel is grieving. Floundering. We were there when they fell in love, every step of the way and it was wonderful. Only now we have to deal with the consequences, the aftermath of losing a loved one. The pain of have fallen for Landon and losing him all too soon.

This book is divided into two parts: Falling and Rising. Falling is painful in so many ways. It deals with Abel's grief. We watch him spiral further and further down, become more and more self-destructive. He's drowning in the loss of Landon and the only way he knows to numb the pain is with alcohol. We watch him turn into someone we don't recognise and keep hoping that he will have the strength to pull himself up from the despair. The charming and funny guy we fell in love with in book one, has been replaced by a drunk who cares for nothing and no one. The pain Abel feels is so real, you feel it in every word and every moment. It wrecks you and you hurt right along with him.

The second part of the book, Rising brings hope, light in that dark despair. After hitting rock bottom, we see Abel slowly starting to live again, accept that life does go on. That even in the darkest of places there is hope, light. His came in the form of Landon's ex-boyfriend Kieran. The only one that seems to understand and share his pain. Kieran helps him to start over, and putting back the shattered pieces of his life, heart and mind back together. Not only that, we also watch them slowly falling for each other. That from all the grief and sadness, love can still grow. And it was beautiful. Bittersweet, but still beautiful.

Adam Gold puts a lot of emotion into his narration and he did a wonderful job capturing Abel. The pain he felt, the despair. But also confusion and hope. He made it real, made the characters real. However, at times when there were longer paragraphs without any dialogue to break it up, the narration could be a bit stilted didn't feel quite natural or effortless. It wasn't all the times, but it was noticeable when it was there.

This book could probably be read as a standalone, but then you'd miss out on the wonderful journey that started all this. Miss out on falling in love. The pain will be there regardless, but at least you'd have some happiness before dealing with the inevitable loss.

Like I told you in the beginning; I was terrified of starting this book. I knew it was going to be painful, that I was going to use a lot of tissues. And it was, and I did. But what's more, it was all absolutely worth it. To grieve for Landon, but above all to see Abel start over and find happiness and love again. So worth all the pain and tears.
Highly recommended!

A copy of this book was generously provided by the author in exchange for an honest review

Profile Image for True Loveislovereview.
2,850 reviews1 follower
December 4, 2017
*be aware of mild spoilers...I think*
I was reserved to start with this one...after 'No Regrets' it would make it all real and definitive, I didn't know if I was ready... but thank god it was written naturally, with so much love and consideration.... it was good.... Massively loaded with heavy emotions but what to expect when your parter is gone forever.

The spiral is turning down, Abel can't cope without Landon. He is constantly drinking to numb
and not succeeding because the pain inside him is killing.

His therapist advised him to talk and grieve with somebody. But there is no one...
After six months he finally visit Landon's grave.... there is someone else a man he vaguely knows and then he recognize him... it's Kieran, Landon's ex boyfriend and Landon's nurse in the hospital... Abel recognize the grieve in his eyes....

Kieran is also grieving only in some way he can talk about it. They connect a few times but Abel withdraws every time more. Guilt and grief are destructive...

"I looked him in the eyes. Their glassiness had turned to pools. Everyone was so sad. Even the man in the mirror."

It's hard, very very hard to watch, my heart hurt and cracked.... I wanted to scream with and for Abel gosh it was so painful...
He was giving up, couldn't find the strength to go on, finally admitting to himself it was enough...

A knock on his door is his salvation....

Have you ever met a gentle and tender spirit like Kieran.... Ghaaaad I cried when he answered
“It had to be you, Abel. That first step. Only you could know when you were ready.”
Kieran Kieran...thank god you were put on this earth....

Every step in this story felt right, it was deeply moving and lively described.

Wonderful, painful, heartbreaking journey... Written in a well-balanced manner. Plausible in every possible way. All men had their well deserved place....it was so right...!!

It was an exceptional journey to read... for the ones who didn't read it: First read: No Regrets !!!
After finishing 'No Regrets' I highly recommend this one.
Profile Image for Tina.
1,782 reviews1 follower
May 21, 2018
Please, don't read this book as a standalone. Read No Regrets first!

OMG... Abel really hits rock bottom after losing Landon.

in my opinion this story was much harder to read than No Regrets, the first book of the series.
Abel's self-destructive behaviour and his grief and despair broke my heart all over again. OMG...I sobbed so hard... I needed lots of tissues.

But there's Kieran! That he of all people does everything possible to save Abel just blew me away.

Thanks for another fabulous book, Nicky!




Profile Image for Elsbeth.
1,299 reviews40 followers
June 4, 2017
description

description

This was so beautiful.!! Abel's journey to happiness was so painful. His grief was unbearable and it was slowly killing him.

How happy I was for him that he found a friend in Kieran. Kieran who understood him and stood by him in his grief. And to see them develop feelings for each other, it would've pleased Landon so much...

"I’ll never be far from you. Just close your eyes and put a hand on your heart. That is where I will live eternally. You gave me more than I ever could have hoped for. You stood by my side through all of it. I love you, Abel. Please take care of yourself."


*wipes tears away

Although this book can be read as a standalone, I wouldn't recommend it. To really experience what Abel went through, you have to read his story with Landon first (No Regrets).

No Regrets by Nicky James

Profile Image for Pam Nelson.
3,798 reviews124 followers
April 12, 2019
Ahh this book, I am glad we didn’t have to be present for the death. This was more the aftermath. It was powerful and emotional. Grief is personal to everyone and it affects us all in a different way. No one griefs the same.

The downward spiral Abel finds himself in really is hard to listen to sometimes because you want him to be ok and he isn’t he is trying so hard but he just isn’t ok.

The counselor sees through some of the stuff Abel hinds and he really means well but I don’t think he understood just how deep into despair Abel was. The friendship he finds with Kieran I completely believe was through the hands of Landon because Able needed someone who understood and Kieran needed someone who understood.

The way it happens is organic and meant to be it never felt forced and for that I am thankful.

The narration is really great but again Michigan accent sounding Boston not going to lie that threw me a LOT. But I loved his Kieran voice so it evens out.
Profile Image for Andrea.
1,348 reviews48 followers
September 14, 2021
I shouldn't have read this book, I should have just stopped after the first one😭💔😭

I haven’t been so utterly destroyed by a book in more than 10 years. I had to stop this book five and a half minutes before it was finished because I couldn't watch/hear/bear what Abel was about to do...it was destroying me and making me so upset...Like I'm talking almost making me start sobbing, apparently I've gotten far too attached to Landon. His letter before the first chapter & this Final Chapter have been the most painful for me. I'm serious, it's like freaking grief. My chest has hurt pretty much throughout this entire book, but for Landon, not necessarily Abel (although I’m sure there were a few instances where it did)


*************** I wrote the below part of the review before I read the last few chapters***************

I'm kind of disappointed in this book. I thought something would happen because it was warned about in this book, but it hardly happened at all and I'm not sure it even really qualified😑. Also I do like Kieran, however, I just can't do their relationship when it is sexual, I prefer their friendship, or even a QPR... It hurts my heart & makes my chest clench to read about them/skim them being together. I mean it might seem ridiculous, but it really does hurt my heart🥺. Ironically enough, that's the exact reason I initially was going to skip book one, because I was afraid I wouldn't like who Abel ended up with as much... And lo and behold, I was correct. 

********DISCLAIMER********
** I skipped the sex scenes of course, although of the little bit that I did hear, it seemed like they would have pissed me off anyway because Kieran was too toppy.** 
Profile Image for Cyndi (hiatus).
750 reviews45 followers
March 25, 2022
What can I possibly say that hasn't already been said in other reviews? My eyes are nearly swollen shut from crying so much. Since I just finished No Regrets yesterday, all of the memories of Landon and Abel's relationship were still so fresh that Abel's grief felt like a tangible thing to me. It honestly felt like I lost someone real and significant in my life and walking the tormented road of memories, nightmares and loss with Abel was excruciating. He was in such a bad place that he was almost beyond recognition from the person we met in the first book. When Landon left, he took that Abel with him and it was heartbreaking to watch him spiral. This might have been the most painful book I've ever read.

Landon may have been gone, but he was very much a character in this book. At times the relationship building between Abel and Kieran felt almost polyamorous because Landon was so deeply ingrained in it. I was so worried that I wouldn't accept Kieran. I thought I'd resent his place in Landon's life and be defensive of Abel's grief when compared to his. I had nothing to worry about. There was such an obvious distinction between Before Diagnosis Landon and After Diagnosis Landon that it was almost like each man had loved someone completely different. They could compare stories without stepping on each others toes and there was no jealousy, no animosity. Their love for Landon brought them together when they needed solace and then their love for each other allowed them to move forward. So as much as I expected to hate the dude, I just couldn't.

The way the author slowly and carefully pulled Kieran and Abel together was absolute perfection. Had the pace been any faster or the actions/reactions been even slightly different, this book could have easily become a disaster. Instead it felt natural and realistic, not rushed or forced at all. Their dynamic morphed and changed in a really authentic way and I was so relieved by the way things played out. It hurt like hell, but it had to.

As I was nearing the end and that last chapter was in view I thought I could finally put those damn tissues away, but nope - this book wasn't done with me yet. I plan to read the rest of this series, but if the other two books dole out even a fraction of the emotional ass kicking the first two did, I'm going to need to read something fun and funny first because I'm. Wrung. Out.
Profile Image for Papie.
875 reviews186 followers
April 7, 2022
This is aptly named Abel’s journey. It’s a story about loss, grief, addiction. About spinning out of control. There is very little romance, although the romance is beautiful.

This story is in two parts, but it felt like four parts to me.
Part 1. Landon is gone and Abel is struggling.
Part 2. Abel is falling. He is losing everything.
Part 3. Healing. Friendship.
Part 4. Romance.

It took me some time to get into the story. The book really gripped me starting in the second part, when we see Abel losing control on his life. His heartbreak was horrible to witness. So much pain. It was really hard to read. But worth it. Kieran was so amazing, solid, trustworthy.

The romance was lovely. Two grieving souls finding each other. I loved how their love for Landon was still there, but they also loved each other.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Ula'ndi Hart.
987 reviews15 followers
May 6, 2021
Overall book rating: 3.8
Audio Book: N/A
Book Cover: 3


Abel's story was sad. Really heartbreaking.

I got mad at him. I cried with him. I wanted to smack him at some point.
I didn't like the way he treated his brother... and I had to remind myself time
and again that he's in a very bad place. Not capable of making good choices
and not capable of seeing what he's doing to those who love him.

It was tragic and real.

I loved Kieran. There really isn't much to say about that. He was a great character.
He got under my skin really fast.

So yes. There were tears and frustration. But there was healing and good feelings as well.




Profile Image for Elithanathile.
1,927 reviews
0-mm-books-i-own-and-to-be-read
May 16, 2017
YAY it's mine <3!!!

The continuation or more specifically, the follow up to "No Regrets". I want this book <3!! When this one is in my hot little hands, I might just have to crack open book #1 <3!!
Profile Image for Marthea.
1,008 reviews16 followers
November 19, 2019
Szczęścia, chłopaki 💙💙💙 Zasłużyliście sobie na nie. Landon i tak zawsze będzie z Wami - jako piękne wspomnienie innego szczęścia 💖💖💖
Profile Image for Ana.
1,041 reviews
April 11, 2020
This was such a good book. Very hard to read, but the emotion in it make it so beautiful. I was skeptical about Abel having a new relationship so soon, but I liked that the book put my doubts away. It worked perfect. I liked the plot. I liked the characters. I liked the writing and how the author gives enough time to Abel to heal. I also loved the secondary characters. Can’t wait to read Soren’s story. It wasn’t an easy book to read. I had to put it down a few times, when emotion was a bit overwhelming, but in the end it was exactly what I was looking for.
Profile Image for Layla .
1,468 reviews76 followers
May 18, 2024
My review:

Me for almost all the book: 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Me for the last part of the book: 🥹😍🥹😍

That is all.
Profile Image for Isa Tis.
612 reviews10 followers
July 11, 2017
4,5*

Ce roman est pour moi une réussite ! Ecrire une suite à No regrets était un pari risqué mais c'est aussi un très beau cadeau fait à tous ceux qui ont aimé Abel: celui de pouvoir le retrouver, de voir comment il se remet de la perte de Landon. Et c'est terrible, absolument terrible ! Abel m'a bouleversée tant sa souffrance est palpable, c'était une épreuve particulièrement éprouvante de le voir toucher le fond... Car oui, Abel est au plus bas et puis, peu à peu, il se relèvera avec l'aide d'un homme merveilleux, je n'ai pas d'autres mots pour le décrire. En plus, il est le propriétaire d'un gros matou absolument craquant et volage ♥♥♥

Nicky James a parfaitement maîtrisé un récit des plus délicats car certes Abel traverse un deuil douloureux mais le lecteur aussi ! Landon est omniprésent, il est là, tout proche, et nous sommes persuadés que personne ne pourra le remplacer.
Quand j'ai appris l'identité de celui qui parviendra à redonner à Abel la force de se battre, j'ai eu très peur, j'avais des doutes que l'auteur a balayés. C'est avec beaucoup de justesse et de façon très progressive qu'elle construit, fil après fil, ces liens qui se tissent entre les deux héros, liens qui se consolident toujours plus.
J'ai éprouvé énormément d'empathie pour Abel, il m'a déchiré le coeur tant sa douleur est vivace et puis surtout, elle est décuplée par le fait qu'il a conscience de ne pas respecter la promesse faite à Landon. C'est tellement cruel pour lui. Mais heureusement, l'épaule qu'il trouvera saura lui apporter soutien et réconfort.

Je ne peux m'empêcher d'évoquer Soren, le jeune frère d'Abel, lui aussi m'a tellement touchée. Le voir si démuni face à la souffrance de son frère a été un crève-coeur. Ce personnage est un amour et il me tarde de découvrir son histoire dans The Escape: Soren's Saga, arffff elle s'annonce pleine de promesses.

Bon je vais pousser un petit grognement et là je pousse un cri du coeur:
Profile Image for Jessica Alcazar.
4,394 reviews622 followers
October 6, 2019
So here’s the thing, you know how I’m always saying you have to be careful with books even when they say standalone because sometimes a person’s journey in a book really starts before the book you’re reading … I’m telling you this now and you should listen. But you don’t have to if you don’t want to. But it will be your loss :)

Second thing I want to touch on before I tell you about the greatness in this book is the **TRIGGER WARNING** … pay attention to it, k. The author put it there for a reason, so …

Okay then … so this story is going to gut you. But it will also lift you up. This was an incredibly uplifting journey full of gut-wrenching turns. That’s the best I can do with a description that doesn’t tell you what happens. This is one of those books that you will feel when you read it. The anguish and the hurt and the sadness along with the joy and the love will all be felt more than they will just be read. It is some powerful prose.

Again, I can’t stress enough about the warning in this book. I sobbed the entire way. I knew the triggers were coming and it still gutted me at times. But it is such an uplifting story of growth and hope and heart …. A lot of frikkin heart!

Copy provided for blog tour review
Profile Image for Isa.
1,143 reviews
December 27, 2019
4+, 2/3 książki męczące :P ale prawdą jest, że przemyślenia Abla bardzo mnie wykończyły :/ może byłam zmęczona, kiedy po nią sięgałam, ale cierpiętnictwo Abla było ponad moje siły :D a później ogarnął się, oczywiście z pomocą Kierana, i od razu czytanie stało się przyjemne ;)
Profile Image for Jola.
778 reviews8 followers
September 28, 2019
Takie 4,7-5,0
Abel za dużo miał męczących przemyśleń :D
Profile Image for Asia.
579 reviews1 follower
September 30, 2019
przemieliła mnie ta książka emocjonalnie.
nigdy nie zapomnę Spidey'a. nigdy nie chcialabym byc na miejscu Abla.
uwielbiam to co stworzyli z Kieranem. bądźcie zawsze szczęśliwi chlopaki:*
Profile Image for Sue bowdley.
1,449 reviews
February 2, 2018
I'm not sure if I can do this book justice with this review but i'll try....It's the follow up to No Regrets where we met Abel and Landon...This takes place about seven months after Landon loses his battle with cancer....Although his death and funeral are not on page, throughout the story you can just feel how hard it's been for Abel. It's broken his heart, it's breaking him down and he's losing his battle with life as he succumbs to alcohol to try and numb the pain. Help from an unexpected source is a relief but also baffles Abel as to why, why he feels so calm around this man....But it helps...There's some really heart-breaking moments and you will shed a lot of tears before you start to smile, because the second half of this book will make you smile. Abel slowly comes back to himself and proves that you can start afresh with the memories not so breaking. This book was written so beautifully, you will want to hold Abel tight and help him through his loss....I will definitely be re-reading this but not for awhile...I think I need to recover first x
Profile Image for Ray Flores.
1,689 reviews255 followers
May 27, 2025
Trigger Warnings: alcohol abuse, suicidal thoughts, self-harm, grief due to the passing of a loved one. Please read the whole list on the author’s site.

Last year I read the first book and by the end of it, I was sobbing, so heartbroken for Landon and Abel’s love story ‘cause I knew their happiness wouldn’t last much. Unfortunately, Landon passed away only a few months later and so, in this book, we see how Abel had to go through all of that heart-breaking process. He was in a bad place: Abel lost his job, was barely making ends, was almost failing in every signature in college and didn’t let himself grief for his husband.

In case you don’t know, I lost my dad in January 2024 and we were close. Now, though I feel better than when it just happened, this book still moved me and reminded me of days I though I couldn’t even breathe. Truth is, you never stop grieving the people you once loved, and somehow, their loss can be so heart-wrenching, you may lose yourself in the process –I know I did.

But, just like me, I felt comfort when Abel finally understood he had to let himself cry and hold on onto the people who cared for him, people who truly understood the loss of Landon. Abel made friends with Kieran (Landon’s ex) and went to see his grandma again and look through his stuff –this is a big step for overcoming grief. You see, he was attached to Landon’s letter, one in which he wanted him to move on, to hold on to love and to be able to live his life after his passing. Which was easier said than done, but slowly but surely he found his way.

Kieran was like a balm to his broken heart. He gave him his friendship, offered him a place to stay and even helped him find a job. And for me, their friendship meant everything to them. They both lose a part of them when Landon died, but sharing stories about him made them close together.

Truth is, healing is not linear: some days you feel like you’re OK, that you moved on, but other days you wish you can never feel anything ever again. This book reminded me you can miss someone with your whole heart, and still be at peace because they don’t feel pain anymore.
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