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Yasodhara and the Buddha

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By combining the spirit of fiction with the fabulism of Indian mythology and in-depth academic research, Vanessa R. Sasson shares the evocative story of the Buddha from the perspective of a forgotten woman: Yasodhara, the Buddha's wife.

Although often marginalized, Yasodhara's narrative here comes to life. Written with a strong feminist voice, we encounter Yasodhara as a fiercely independent, passionate and resilient individual. We witness her joys and sorrows, her expectations and frustrations, her fairy-tale wedding, and her overwhelming devastation at the departure of her beloved.

It is through her eyes that we witness Siddhattha's slow transformation, from a sheltered prince to a deeply sensitive young man. On the way, we see how the gods watch over the future Buddha from the clouds, how the king and his ministers try to keep the suffering of the world from him and how he eventually renounces the throne, his wife and newly-born son to seek enlightenment.

Along with a foreword from Wendy Doniger, the book includes a scholarly introduction to Yasodhara's narrative and offers extensive notes along with study questions, to help readers navigate the traditional literature in a new way, making this an essential book for anyone wanting to learn about Buddhist narratives.

304 pages, Paperback

Published January 14, 2021

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Vanessa R. Sasson

11 books23 followers

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Displaying 1 - 29 of 29 reviews
Profile Image for Kavita Jhala.
Author 1 book18 followers
July 16, 2018
Each time her heart broke - she became more determined to know.

Everyone extols the virtues of the pious and the saints but do anyone dwell on who were behind them?

Do they see what the women had to undergo?

Yasodhara by Vanessa R Sasson caught my eye from the first time I scrolled through the list of the new releases by Speaking Tiger Publication. We have all heard about Buddha and his teachings, but know hardly anything about his wife or his other family members. It seems that there has been an unintentional omission or a deliberate need to hide it all ... that we don't know; yet the need to read about Buddha's wife was powerful enough to seek the copy of this book. Additionally, the cover of the book is simple yet so beautiful!

This hagiographic fiction novel is a delight to the reader, catapulting them to the bygone era but with a contemporary rendering.  It sounds out like a folklore - simple and yet evocative. It questions the deliberations of the men, the musings of the women and the societal changes that preceded them and after them.

The women try to balance it out and seem to have an unshakable spirit. Whether they speak it or they act it - Yasodhara is influenced by both and she learns to take baby-steps into the world that so far is imbalanced in its views. When you get your hand on the book you might think it's all "feminist". Yes, the author is a female so the female perspective is there. However the interesting thing is that with lack of records and evidence, the author has tried to painstakingly recreate the situations and circumstances of that period.

With an easy to understand narrative, the novel flows through the life of Yasodhara and is a reader's delight. My verdict is .... do go for it! Go and find yourself in that book, in every character.
Profile Image for Apricity.
235 reviews73 followers
July 2, 2021
No offense to anyone especially the author but many points made in this book don't match the ones I've heard and read from various sources.
First of all Queen Maya was a princess. Her brother who ruled their kingdom married King Śuddhodana's sister. Princess Maha Prajapati also known as Gautami wasn't a courtesan to Śuddhodana.
After Siddhartha was born Maya returned to the palace. She died sometime after her son's fortune was read. Before dying, she requested her sister Maha Prajapati to look after her son. The latter and Śuddhodana were married off later.
Śuddhodana definitely didn't ignore any of his duties in the grief of his first wife's death. While he did mourn Maya he was a doting yet stern father, a caring ruler, and a good husband. He respected Maha Prajapati and did listen to her suggestions and advice in courtly matters as well.
Prince Siddhartha grew up under Maha Prajapati's care. She was his mother not his aunt. She supported his empathy, didn't think his compassionate attitude wasn't princely. In fact, his name Gautam Buddha comes from his aunt's name which shows what a huge, important role she played in his life.
Yashodhara was Śuddhodana's sister's and Maya and Maha Prajapati's brother's daughter, a princess in her own right. It wasn't any different than European royalty's marriages.
Yashodhara knew of Siddhartha's decision of leaving the palace and she did not resent him. She raised their son with love and care. When Gautam Buddha visited the palace after he had received the enlightenment she, Maha Prajapati and Rahul did go with him and converted to Buddhism.
Profile Image for Rolanda Crockpot.
53 reviews2 followers
Read
February 18, 2025
Pedagogical, YAish stylings weighed on me, but in general I f’d with this, especially how it highlights the contradictions of the founding myths. lovely endnotes
Profile Image for Artemisia Hunt.
788 reviews20 followers
October 6, 2021
A beautiful novel, lovingly bringing the story of the Buddha to life through the eyes of his wife Yasodhara. Little is known about the young bride who was left behind by Prince Siddhattha whose own spiritual quest became the origins of Buddhism over 2500 years ago. However, this book gives us a fascinating picture, in keeping with the known traditions of the time, of the kind of woman she might have been and of her own spiritual calling as well. With all the enchantment of a fairy tale, Buddhist scholar Vanessa R Sasson creates a magical rendering of the beginnings of Buddhism by focusing as much on the one left behind, making Yasodhara an interesting, passionate part of the story.
183 reviews2 followers
February 11, 2021
Good book that opened my awareness of buddhism (which was near zero) although I felt the book failed to take off the way it was threatening to...
Profile Image for Audrey.
12 reviews
August 12, 2018
Yasodhara is an exquisite feminist fairy tale that's at once playful and profound. I couldn't put it down, and when I read the last line (with tears streaming down my face, no less), I promptly returned to page 1 and started again, flipping through it nostalgically to re-read my favorite sections if only to savor it a little while longer.

The premise alone is captivating, and you don't need to be a Buddhist or a Buddhist scholar or a religion enthusiast to enjoy it (though if you're any of the above, you may appreciate it all the more, for the fine attention to detail and the copious notes at the back of the book that provide textual references and context for the choices Sasson makes in her imaginative yet grounded storytelling). We all know about the Buddha, but few in Western, non-Buddhist spaces know that before he was the Buddha, he was a prince who was married to the love of his life, and that he left her, and their newborn child, abruptly, when he decided to step away from palace life to seek enlightenment. And though much has been written about his journey from prince to Buddha, even in popular culture (I distinctly remember how influential the book Siddhartha was when I myself was a teenager, journeying into adulthood), I had never heard about Yasodhara until picking up this gorgeous novel.

Yasodhara is her story. Told in her voice, it's the fictional imagining of what it would have been like to be young and in love and then suddenly abandoned, within the confines of her particular time and place. It's a story of vulnerability and resilience, told with humor, compassion, and deep insight about the human condition and the relationships that feed us. While the story itself could not be more specific (there was only one Siddhartha and one Yasodhara, no matter how many lifetimes they spent together), it has a universality in the way Sasson depicts the paired experiences of joy and sorrow, love and grief.

Plus, what's more painfully universal than the story of a man who leaves his partner to "go find himself"? Cynically, I'll admit that this familiar "trope" was what attracted me to the story to begin with, but Sasson's portrayal of the prince avoids "going there" and instead treats all the characters with nuance and grace, which is itself a lesson in humility. More importantly, though, it's her portrayal of Yasodhara and the experiences and challenges that shape her that make this a truly captivating read.

To avoid spoiling it, I'll stop there. But I can't overstate how happily I devoured this novel. You won't regret it!

Profile Image for Navdha  (House Of Reads) .
20 reviews
March 14, 2021
"A life of renunciation is a life of social death. The moment he walked away, he made me a widow. That is the way of things and I need to accept it." - Yasodhara
Having birthed a little boy and at a time when a woman needs her husband's love and support the most, Yasodhara was abandoned by her Husband Siddhattha.
As the world knows as Buddha.

VANESSA R SASSON'S Yasodhara gives a voice to a woman who lived in the shadows of her husband. The one who faced the unfair decisions made by him even if they were meant for the greater good of humanity. Born on the same day Yasodhara and Siddhattha were distant cousins who were married. While growing up life was on an opposite spectrum for them. On one hand Yasodhara lived a carefree life, in touch with the realities. Life on the other hand for the young prince was orchestrated by the prophecies that were made at his birth. The predictions were that either he would become the greatest sage or the greatest ruler the world has ever seen. A prediction which did not go well with his father, the King. Therefore Siddhattha lead a life oblivious to the sufferings of the world. His vision of the world was what his father, wanted him to see. But nature and destiny had its own way of working. So when he got his first shot at freedom he welcomed it , and with that he welcomed his future. The future that was unavoidable.
The book was a wonderful read. It had me thinking a lot. I could feel for Yasodhara, at the same time the decision that the young Sakya Prince made was expected after living an entire life of a lie. It had me torn between both of them through out but in the end it wasn't about who was wronged but something more deeper. We all in ways live under an illusion and not in touch with the realities. The realisation often is difficult and sometimes a hard choice.
The story gave me a picture of the women of the Sakya kingdom, the lifestyle. It gave voice to many surrounding characters which was new to me. The writing was crisp and the author did complete justice to Yashodhara. Lastly, I absolutely loved the cover art of the book
Rating ⭐⭐⭐/5

#bookshelf #bookreview
#buddhism #buddha #indianbookreviewer
Profile Image for Bram.
55 reviews
August 21, 2019
A Female’s view of the Buddha’s life

Although the book started slowly for me, I ended up loving this story. Yasodhara was Siddhattha’s wife before he renounced his throne and went into the forest. The story is told from her perspective, and we gain a new perspective of the life of the Buddha. Imagine finding out that your husband was leaving you just when you gave birth to your first son.
255 reviews49 followers
January 21, 2021
I read this book because my prof wrote it, but I enjoyed it as I would any good book. Thought-provoking, beautifully-written, tender, powerful and profound.
232 reviews13 followers
September 2, 2018
Yasodhara, A Novel about the Buddha's Wife.
Vanessa. R. Sasson.
Speaking Tiger.
2018. Pp- 304.

Blurb-

"A long time ago, in a far-off kingdom, a boy and a girl, born on the same day, were destined to be together—and then painfully wrenched apart. The boy was Siddhattha, heir to the Sakya kingdom and the future Buddha; the girl was the beautiful and precocious Yasodhara, his friend who became his loving wife."

Review -

I have all praises for this one and I don't know where to start from.
What I liked most about the book is that it brings the reader closer to the author's thought. The pages in there are not just limited to a story, but the inspiration behind its origin and its very becoming. The reader has the privilege to understand the inception of the story. Specially the Notes section at the end adds on to the authenticity of the entire work.

Talking about the story now, it brings a fresh perspective in place.
I'd been as aware of the Buddhist literature and the becoming of Buddha as anyone out there.
This book, however, adds value and does justice to the literature.
Though a work of fiction, it is at its finest and quite impressive at that.

I was personally swept away by the narration, turning page over page, not feeling the time at all.
The build up, use of words, the introduction and detailing on the characters and anything else you could possible think of, was nothing less than perfect.
It had been a very long time since I read something as refined as this.

This is one of the most emotionally compelling retellings I've read and the last time I remember having felt this strongly was when I finished The Palace of Illusions! And that means quite something for me.

And I would give it a 6 on 5 if I could. A must read :')

Cannot thank @speakingtiger enough for this beautiful piece of work. Thank you for the #reviewcopy!

25 down @htbrunch #htbrunchbookchallenge #BrunchBookChallenge #htbrunch

#bookstagramindia #bookstagrammer #bookstagram #bookstagrammer #review #bookreview #speakingtiger #delhibookstagrammer #indianblogger #indianauthor #igreads
Profile Image for Diane B.
604 reviews4 followers
March 22, 2019
I attended a talk given by the author at the Toronto Reference Library before I read the book. The title intrigued me.

Buddha had a wife? I confess I hadn't given the matter much thought, although I have read several Buddhist texts and some philosophy.

The author is a scholar and follower of Buddhism and dedicated several years to writing the novel. She couldn't find a publisher in North America, so the book is not for sale in most bookstores.

Sasson read a passage of the last moments Yasodhara spends with her son, saying goodbye to the seven year old who will be joining the Buddha, and leaving her side forever. Although the scene happened 2500 years ago, it reads with a surprisingly modern voice and sentiment.

This truly is a work of speculative fiction, but it is an informed work, with footnotes throughout. Culture shapes our world view and although I am sure I think differently than a woman who would have lived millennia ago, on a different continent, in ancient times, in a palace... well maybe we still have many parts of our human nature in common.

Now that I have finished reading the book I can say it is a lovely imagining. What would it have been like to grow up 2500 years ago, playing in royal gardens? Living in a palace? Being married to the love of your life, who then leaves you only hours after your long-awaited son has been born?

I imagine some of Yasodhara's reactions would have been profoundly different than they were drawn in the book. I imagine a woman of the time would have very different ideas about equality and expectations of the role of wife and caste. There would be an entirely different psychology. However, I appreciate this rendering and interpretation as it reflects my own reactions to Buddhism, especially in the area of attachment and non-attachment.

" 'I had to leave and cut the bonds that caused suffering if answers were ever to be found.'
'But I love those bonds, my heart cried out. Those bonds are what make life worth living!' "

Buddha himself may or may not have existed. Scriptures were recorded long after his life and death, and told in different versions and books. Buddhism tailored itself as it traveled from India to China, to Japan, to the West.This is another version and telling, but this time with a focus on Yasodhara.

It does not seem right for someone would leave their newborn son and wife to live as a mendicant... it seems like a householder abdicating responsibility and causing deep pain and upset. Of course, the prince also abdicates the throne. He hurts all those around him to gain enlightenment. Do the ends justify the means, if the prize is full enlightenment and the potential to bring awakening to thousands more? An interesting moral question. Hurting everyone you know to save others yet unmet.

29 reviews1 follower
August 2, 2023
My 12th read for 2023 is " Yashodhara " by VANESSA R. SASSON . She is a professor of Religious Studies in the Liberal and Creative Arts and Humanities Department at Marianopolis College, Quebec. She is also a Research Fellow at a University in South Africa.
An Imaginative fiction, written after detailed research and devotion. Narrative style exhibits the process of creative writing. Yashodhara's character has been developed into a three-dimensional strong character with depth through different events of her life. One scene played is Suparankha in the Novel , which is quite different from the Valmiki version , but thought-provoking.
A bit disappointed with the author's narration related to Yashodhara's reaction to her abandonment by Siddhatta. Neither I am satisfied with the philosophical answers of Buddha to her questions.
" .... You wanted an answer to suffering, but you caused suffering for all of us to find it " One of the answers by Buddha " Attachment can destroy us ". Neither it is impact full or convincing. It could be a cautioned approach by Vanessa to avoid any controversy.
Personnaly I liked this beautiful message from the Novel : Yashodhara's mother words to her after abandonment
" Your pain is deep and it is frightening you. But you must not allow yourself to stay this way. You must heal yourself. You must close what has been opened and it must be done carefully. Otherwise, you risk becoming a tapestry of scars . ..... But how? One stitch at a time, little one. "
Worth a read who are interested in hagiographic fiction .
101 reviews
November 16, 2023
This is a fictional account of the Buddha's leaving home to find enlightenment from the point of view of his wife, Yasodhara. Chris passed this book on to me. Since I have a serious interest in Buddhism I enjoyed entering the world of the people who he grew up with. I guess you can't tell this story without including some mythology, such as the sky raining flowers on the day that Sidhartha left, or him radiating light after his enlightenment. They also said a few times that Sidhartha and Yasodhara had lived numerous lifetimes together.
Current day Buddhists struggle with the concepts of leaving home and reincarnation. The fact that he left his wife and child and parents is hard to reconcile with conventional beliefs about duty and commitment. Zen Mountain Monastery will not ordain anyone who has young children. You have to believe that it was a supernatural calling that led to the founding of Buddhism, and the book has Yasodhara joining his followers after he comes back and takes away their 7 year old son (really?????).
But these contradictions are things that have to be pondered if you admire the principles of Buddhism.
28 reviews
April 6, 2023
Sasson's writing is beautifully crafted and transports the reader to the ancient world of India, where the story is set. The author's portrayal of Yashodhara is particularly compelling, as she is often overlooked in traditional Buddhist narratives. In this book, Yashodhara's character is given the depth and complexity she deserves.

The book provides a detailed account of the life of Yashodhara, from her early years as a princess to her eventual marriage to Prince Siddhartha. The story explores the challenges faced by Yashodhara as the wife of a man who ultimately becomes a spiritual leader, and the sacrifices she makes to support him.

Overall, "Yashodhara and Buddha" is a thought-provoking and well-written book that sheds light on the life of Yashodhara and the challenges faced by women in ancient India. It is a must-read for those interested in Buddhism, women's history, and historical fiction
Profile Image for Ananya Mandal.
212 reviews
August 6, 2024
It's the story of Siddhartha's renunciation of family life, his home and throne, for attainment of Bodhi. It is written from the point of view of his wife, Yashodhara. The story is well known to us Indians. We've read it in Amar Chitra Katha comics and then again as text in history lessons at school. The 4 sights, the Great Truths, and the Eight fold path. What we've never really thought about is how it was for the wife abandoned. She is widowed with a living husband. Her hurt and pain and burden of being a single parent to her son. Her anguish as her 7 year old son Rahul is taken away from her to join the order. In modern context, wife abandonment and later separation from an only child seem cruel and heartless. In the book, however, when Buddha comes back to see her, the pain eases at his words.
This book is well researched, with detailed references provided for each of the accounts fictionalized here. Language is sometimes a bit too casual and modern for comfort (especially those of the farmers). Felt a bit odd.
As a woman, it touches the heart like no other book on the Buddha does. Yashodhara is written here like Radha. She pines for Krishna, knowing He is meant for the greater good and will never return.
2 reviews
Read
January 4, 2021
As explained by the title itself, this book revolves around the Yasodhara and how she overcame the frustration and grief, after her husband, Siddharta left on his search to fine the answer to all the sufferings.
After enlightenment, Buddha came back to take their only son Rahula on the same path.
I was really touched by the ending of the story where , Yashodara and Mahapajapati, Siddharta's second mother also joins in the cause of finding answer to the pains .
3 reviews2 followers
January 16, 2021
Such an amazing book! A culturally rich rendition Buy an awesome scholar of Indian Buddhism. The book brings us the wife of the Buddha in a very digestible, contemporary, readable form. Sasson’s deep scholarship, her impeccable scholarship on family formation and children in various forms of Buddhism, this book like no other available! Sit back and enjoy the exquisite, amazingly rich narration.
Profile Image for Anugya Agrawal.
13 reviews1 follower
January 28, 2021
Amazing read the writer has put forth all the emotions that Yasodhara must have felt and while reading u feel empathy towards her and felt the same anguish she had felt towards Siddhartha when he left her At the same time felt the same peace what she felt when Yahodhara also decided to follow the path of awakening
A must read
Profile Image for Tsey Peday.
28 reviews1 follower
August 29, 2021
An amazing novel, a much needed one. Being a Buddhist, I am always told about Buddha, and knew extremely little about his wife.
Vanessa has done justice to not just Yasodhara, but to Buddha himself and all of us by bringing out this book.
I loved knowing Yasodhara, her independence, her fierceness, her kindness, her patience... Everything about her is what any woman will want to be!
Profile Image for Haymar Poudel.
9 reviews1 follower
September 4, 2023
3.5 stars
The book is about Siddhartha’s journey before becoming Buddha. It’s a familiar tale, and tons of versions are already available but, one of a kind written as a fiction from Yashodara’s point of you. Well researched, that’s for sure. Fresh take and compels you to think from certain points despite some flaws.
Profile Image for Ina.
33 reviews
February 21, 2024
Herlig, lettlest bok for forestiller seg hvordan Yasodhara, Buddahs kone sitt liv kan ha vært. Stengt inne i palasset, forlatt av mannen som senere tar sønnen bort fra henne for å sende han i lære om den rette vei. Skaper en nydelig filosofisk refleksjon om kvinnens liv og status i historien samtidig som den formidler buddhistisk historie og mytologi.
Profile Image for Kit Moore.
37 reviews1 follower
March 4, 2025
Read this for my Buddhism class. We actually got to talk to the author and it was really great!

I really liked this book and found it to make Buddhism very accessible to people with no prior exposure. There is also not much information on the Buddha's wife, oftentimes she is not mentioned or disregarded, and it was very interesting to read this story in her perspective.

Would recommend!
23 reviews
August 27, 2021
In this book I loved the conversations between the mother and daughter and the ones between mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law....reading those conversations I felt that in those tender movements there was something very empowering and liberating...
Profile Image for Zoë Jackson-Newbold.
57 reviews10 followers
December 22, 2021
I was drawn to 'Yasodhara & the Buddha' as I know very little about the Buddha's life, and learning through a novelisation appealed to me. The author is an academic of Buddhism Studies, and provides references and notes on details that she has changed from traditional narratives at the end of the book.

I am not Buddhist, nor from a region where Buddhism is widely practiced, so cannot comment on the authenticity of the narrative Sasson presents. I have seen negative reviews of a previous copy of this work from Buddhists questioning its veracity, however, so would take the narrative as a sort of Buddhist Midrash and do research from more traditional texts before taking it as fact.

The story itself is told simply, and focuses on the perspective of the Buddha's wife Yasodhara, with a slight Feminist lens given to the tale. The characterisation of Yasodhara was endearing, and I really felt connected to her in her times of sadness and grief. The simplicity of the writing is beautiful in places, though I felt the pacing was too slow during the middle section of the book.

Overall I found the novel interesting, but remain unsure of how true it is to Buddhist traditions. I await reviews from more informed readers to form my opinions further.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing me with an advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
210 reviews
November 30, 2023
Yashodara is one of the most fascinating character. though mush is not written about her but few has tried to look the circumstances through her eyes. this is one attempt towards that. average read
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