If You Loved Me, You'd Stop!: What You Really Need to Know When Your Loved One Drinks Too Much

by Lisa Frederiksen

If you are one of the nearly 80 million Americans (and hundreds of millions more worldwide) affected by someone's drinking, this book is for you. This updated version explains what it is about coping with a loved one's drinking that is so harmful to the family member's physical and emotional health. It answers questions why is alcoholism considered a brain disease? what does it take to treat it? why is alcoholism different than alcohol abuse? and what does the brain, adverse childhood experiences, secondhand drinking, and toxic stress have to do with all of this? This 10th Anniversary Edition not only shares these answers in comprehensible language, but it offers suggestions for helping yourself. Because no matter how much you love someone whose drinking affects your life, and no matter how much they love you back, love will not and cannot make them stop. The good news is that it's entirely possible for you to truly enjoy your life –– whether your loved one stops drinking or whether you continue your relationship with them, redefine it, or end it altogether. Additionally, this 10th Anniversary Edition can help those who are struggling with a drinking problem understand what has happened to them and what they can do to change and/or treat it. It can also help family members whose loved ones have an opioid or other drug use disorder. Educators; treatment and medical professionals; family law practitioners; juvenile and criminal justice professionals; community, business, and public policy leaders and others whose work involves substance use disorders and their impacts on family members, co-workers, and the community-at-large can benefit from reading this book, as well.

243 pages, Kindle Edition

Published April 20, 2020

About the author

Lisa Frederiksen has a 38-year career in executive management, consulting, speaking, and writing. Guided by her personal experience with secondhand drinking (SHD) and working to overcome its impact, Lisa has now spent more than a decade researching, writing, consulting, and speaking on a range of SHD-related topics, all anchored in 21st century brain research.

http://www.breakingthecycles.com/blog...

Reviews

[PAULA · Rating 5 out of 5]

Eye opening

Great book on fully understanding alcohol, and any other addiction. I really liked how she talked about the science behind the disease. This is a must read for anyone struggling with trying to understand their alcoholic loved ones. And how to keep the focus on yourself with love.

[ashley goodman · Rating 5 out of 5]

great read especially as a “secondhand drinker”

This book is great for anyone dealing with a loved one that is an alcoholic or an addict. It gives you insight into where to start with recovery for you and your family. Not the addict

[Susan Bramer · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a the spouse of an alcoholic, the author finally scientifically explained how after the brain changes in a fashion that made the fact it’s an acquired disease clear to me. Definitely worth the read.