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Faithful Friendships: Embracing Diversity in Christian Community
On the necessity of boundary-crossing friendships for Christian discipleship
Friendship isn’t always given a lot of thought—and lately, it doesn’t get a lot of time and effort, either. But in a world of busy and isolated lives, in which friendships can too easily become shallow, tenuous, and homogeneous, Dana Robert insists that good friendships are a vital and transformative part of the Christian life—a mustard seed of the kingdom of God. She believes Christians have the responsibility—and opportunity—to be countercultural by making friends across cultural, racial, socioeconomic, and religious lines that separate people from each other.
In this book Robert tells the stories of Christians who, despite or even because of difficult circumstances, experienced friendship with people unlike themselves as “God with us,” as exile, as testimony, and as celebration.
Jesus was a friend to his disciples. Through Jesus’s life and the lives of his followers down through the ages, Faithful Friendships shows readers how friendship can become life-changing—and even worldchanging.
Friendship isn’t always given a lot of thought—and lately, it doesn’t get a lot of time and effort, either. But in a world of busy and isolated lives, in which friendships can too easily become shallow, tenuous, and homogeneous, Dana Robert insists that good friendships are a vital and transformative part of the Christian life—a mustard seed of the kingdom of God. She believes Christians have the responsibility—and opportunity—to be countercultural by making friends across cultural, racial, socioeconomic, and religious lines that separate people from each other.
In this book Robert tells the stories of Christians who, despite or even because of difficult circumstances, experienced friendship with people unlike themselves as “God with us,” as exile, as testimony, and as celebration.
Jesus was a friend to his disciples. Through Jesus’s life and the lives of his followers down through the ages, Faithful Friendships shows readers how friendship can become life-changing—and even worldchanging.
227 pages, Kindle Edition
First published September 12, 2019
9 people are currently reading
38 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews
September 8, 2024
This is a stimulating exploration of what makes friendship core to out existence and the impact of friendship through stories and reflection. Dana Robert takes us through the power of friendship to overcome barriers, reflect life wholistically and support those exploited and excluded. She demonstrates what faith looks like through friendship. This is a must read in today’s world where barriers are constructed to isolate and demonise the ‘other’
December 11, 2019
Over the years, as I've encountered more and more people of different backgrounds my view of the world and its people has evolved. Once my friendship circle was rather small, with most looking much I do -- white/Euro-American. I did have a chance to travel to Brazil in my teens, but by and large, my community wasn't all that diverse. But as time went on, especially after I moved onto seminary the circles expanded, at least in terms of ethnicity/race. In the past two decades, the circle has broadened even more as I've lived in religiously diverse communities. As this has taken place my friendship circle has expanded to include Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus, Sikhs, and more.
Dana Robert, professor of World Christianity and History of Mission at the Boston University School of Theology, invites us to envision friendships that cross cultures and embrace diversity. The book focuses on diversity in the Christian community, though reference made occasionally to interfaith relationships (that's, in essence, another book). In this context, diversity exists in ethnic, gender, and socio-economic terms (thought it is primarily ethnic in this book).
In her introduction, Robert writes that "Friendship forms Christian identity." (p. 4). She then says that Jesus and his disciples are the primary model of friendship. So, with Jesus as the model, friendship is the means by which Christian community is created. With that in mind she reports hearing Gustavo Gutierrez speak of the preferential option for the poor as friendship with the poor. As to what he meant by friendship, she records that Gutierrez "meant shared discipleship---faithful obedience to the God of live, walking together in equality with and respect for specific persons whom God loves, and caring for the world God shares." (p. 6) Such friendships aren't easy but they point toward the realm of God.
Robert explores friendship through narrative, introducing us to persons who lived in diverse settings, often cross-cultural ones, including mission contexts. The first chapter focuses on a biblical foundation as seen in the life of Jesus. Then she moves to a broader conversation focusing on practices of friendship in modern history. This leads to four chapters in which she offers biographies of exemplary Christians who lived in the past century and engaged in cross-cultural friendships as central to their Christian identity.
With regard to the biblical foundations, Robert lifts up three spiritual dimensions. First, friendship is rooted in a concrete relationship with Jesus. Secondly, this relationship requires listening and mutuality. Finally, it involves empathy and suffering with others. We will see all three exhibited in what follows. In regard to the historical setting, she emphasizes enculturation and involved a commitment to Jesus' message of love.
Chapter 3 begins a series of biographical stories that illustrate elements of friendship. She starts in chapter 3 with a discussion of friendship in relationship to "remaining." Here we have three stories from missional contexts in which people stayed in friendship in difficult situations, and in doing so embodied God's presence. Chapter 4 speaks of Exile, and offers stories of those who remained behind in cross-cultural contexts, being separated from family and friends. Thus, one story is that of Eric Liddell, who remained in China and died in a Japanese prison camp and that of a cross-cultural marriage that required an American to remain in Japan during World War II, become a Japanese citizen because he couldn't bring his Japanese wife to the United States. She writes that the "hard lesson of exile teaches that Christian fellowship can transcend challenging political and social differences." (p. 111). In chapter 5, titled "Testimony," Robert declares that "friendship is a struggle." It is such both externally (such as when "political, social, and ethnic divisions run high"), and internally (including misunderstanding, betrayal, other internal challenges). The stories here include a friendship between a white Rhodesian pastor and a black pastor during the Civil War following the declaration of independence. The second is the story of friendships in the midst of resistance to a Korean dictator, and finally the friendship of white and black men in the American South. She writes that "the great lesson of struggle in friendship is that despite trauma, new discovery of God's love appears possible in the light of shared community." (p. 139). Then in chapter six, the theme is celebration and joy. The point is that no matter the situation, "friendship is a cause for celebration." (p. 141). Among the friendships explored here is that of Henri Nouwen with Adam at L'Arche and that of Frank Laubach's friendship with the Muslim Moro people in Philippines, which gave birth to a literacy movement.
In chapter seven, Dana Robert she suggests that cross-cultural Christian friendships are the "mustard seeds of hope." They are biblical and "essential to the mission of the church. Thus, "as believers reach across cultural, political, and social boundaries in the name of Christ, they forge relationships of equality and care that are signposts of the kingdom of God" (p. 165). There are limits and challenges to be dealt with, but the promise is there. She offers in the stories told in the book evidence of this fact. To truly understand what this means, we need to recognize that friendship is "a bottom-up spiritual practice, not a top-down strategy" (p. 169). There are not five easy steps to friendship!
Friendship. It is at the heart of the Christian faith, though too often it is neglected. Robert offers us an opportunity to consider what this relational dimension of our faith, one rooted in the person of Jesus, can provide if we are willing to embrace it.
Dana Robert, professor of World Christianity and History of Mission at the Boston University School of Theology, invites us to envision friendships that cross cultures and embrace diversity. The book focuses on diversity in the Christian community, though reference made occasionally to interfaith relationships (that's, in essence, another book). In this context, diversity exists in ethnic, gender, and socio-economic terms (thought it is primarily ethnic in this book).
In her introduction, Robert writes that "Friendship forms Christian identity." (p. 4). She then says that Jesus and his disciples are the primary model of friendship. So, with Jesus as the model, friendship is the means by which Christian community is created. With that in mind she reports hearing Gustavo Gutierrez speak of the preferential option for the poor as friendship with the poor. As to what he meant by friendship, she records that Gutierrez "meant shared discipleship---faithful obedience to the God of live, walking together in equality with and respect for specific persons whom God loves, and caring for the world God shares." (p. 6) Such friendships aren't easy but they point toward the realm of God.
Robert explores friendship through narrative, introducing us to persons who lived in diverse settings, often cross-cultural ones, including mission contexts. The first chapter focuses on a biblical foundation as seen in the life of Jesus. Then she moves to a broader conversation focusing on practices of friendship in modern history. This leads to four chapters in which she offers biographies of exemplary Christians who lived in the past century and engaged in cross-cultural friendships as central to their Christian identity.
With regard to the biblical foundations, Robert lifts up three spiritual dimensions. First, friendship is rooted in a concrete relationship with Jesus. Secondly, this relationship requires listening and mutuality. Finally, it involves empathy and suffering with others. We will see all three exhibited in what follows. In regard to the historical setting, she emphasizes enculturation and involved a commitment to Jesus' message of love.
Chapter 3 begins a series of biographical stories that illustrate elements of friendship. She starts in chapter 3 with a discussion of friendship in relationship to "remaining." Here we have three stories from missional contexts in which people stayed in friendship in difficult situations, and in doing so embodied God's presence. Chapter 4 speaks of Exile, and offers stories of those who remained behind in cross-cultural contexts, being separated from family and friends. Thus, one story is that of Eric Liddell, who remained in China and died in a Japanese prison camp and that of a cross-cultural marriage that required an American to remain in Japan during World War II, become a Japanese citizen because he couldn't bring his Japanese wife to the United States. She writes that the "hard lesson of exile teaches that Christian fellowship can transcend challenging political and social differences." (p. 111). In chapter 5, titled "Testimony," Robert declares that "friendship is a struggle." It is such both externally (such as when "political, social, and ethnic divisions run high"), and internally (including misunderstanding, betrayal, other internal challenges). The stories here include a friendship between a white Rhodesian pastor and a black pastor during the Civil War following the declaration of independence. The second is the story of friendships in the midst of resistance to a Korean dictator, and finally the friendship of white and black men in the American South. She writes that "the great lesson of struggle in friendship is that despite trauma, new discovery of God's love appears possible in the light of shared community." (p. 139). Then in chapter six, the theme is celebration and joy. The point is that no matter the situation, "friendship is a cause for celebration." (p. 141). Among the friendships explored here is that of Henri Nouwen with Adam at L'Arche and that of Frank Laubach's friendship with the Muslim Moro people in Philippines, which gave birth to a literacy movement.
In chapter seven, Dana Robert she suggests that cross-cultural Christian friendships are the "mustard seeds of hope." They are biblical and "essential to the mission of the church. Thus, "as believers reach across cultural, political, and social boundaries in the name of Christ, they forge relationships of equality and care that are signposts of the kingdom of God" (p. 165). There are limits and challenges to be dealt with, but the promise is there. She offers in the stories told in the book evidence of this fact. To truly understand what this means, we need to recognize that friendship is "a bottom-up spiritual practice, not a top-down strategy" (p. 169). There are not five easy steps to friendship!
Friendship. It is at the heart of the Christian faith, though too often it is neglected. Robert offers us an opportunity to consider what this relational dimension of our faith, one rooted in the person of Jesus, can provide if we are willing to embrace it.
December 29, 2025
Dana Robert is one of my beloved professors, so I may be biased, but I love this book. Robert documents many stories—most of which are not well-known—of how Christians have befriended people different from them, particularly over the last few hundred year. Robert is a prolific researcher and esteemed scholar, yet she departs from a formal and academic writing style in this book to make it accessible to a broad audience. I was inspired personally about how powerful and essential ordinary friendship is to living as followers of Jesus, yet also validated about how challenging being a real friend can be—especially when befriending someone from another culture. Overall, I found this book to be encouraging and illuminating. Highly recommend.
February 25, 2021
Rich story telling enhances a discussion about the importance and necessity for Christian friendships that are not based on what I can get out of the other. A highlight was the discussion about Jesus accepting the water from the Samaritan women and how this can be used to show the need and the power of accepting as well as giving if friendships are to be forged.
January 30, 2021
This book was not at all what I thought. Was going to use it for a church book study but it felt like all of the examples were antiquated and too far removed from real life. I should have looked more closely at sample pages. Did not finish it
Displaying 1 - 5 of 5 reviews