Who I Am: The Man Behind the Badge

by Jeff Shaw

Award-Winning Finalist in the Autobiography/Memoir category of the 2021 International Book AwardsThink you know what a police officer does every day? You think Hollywood gets it right?Unless you’ve been out there, you don’t know. Nothing you see on the big screen or on television in the safety of your home can prepare you for what we do every day.Night after night, we deal with the worst society can throw at us, then we go home, sit with our loved ones and pretend we’re okay. But sometimes…we are not okay.In Who I The Man Behind the Badge, I’m going to describe all the gore, all the horrors and all the emotions I felt, not to gross you out but to let you know what I experienced.If you find any of these stories disturbing or uncomfortable, then I have accomplished my goal—because I was equally disturbed and uncomfortable. And I live with these memories every day."You will not be able to put this book down as you follow the author through his career, call by call, experiencing in raw, graphic, and gut wrenching language what would become a normal day for him and members of the Hialeah Police Department during the turbulent 1980’s and 90’s. You will never look at a law enforcement officer the same again…. So slide into his patrol car, buckle up, and prepare yourself for the realities of law enforcement and the ride of your life." —Retired Deputy Chief Edward L. Beyer, Jr. Hialeah Police Department"Written by a seasoned veteran of a major police department, it doesn’t get more real than this. Gritty, brutally honest and intensely personal, this is a must read for anyone in law enforcement, contemplating a career in law enforcement, or has a loved one in law enforcement. This book shines a glaring spotlight on some of the many reasons every citizen should back the blue." —Patricia L. Diaz Retired U.S. Federal Prosecutor and wife of a retired homicide detective

Genres: Nonfiction

304 pages, Kindle Edition

Published April 3, 2020

Reviews

[Melissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I know Jeff Shaw, the author of Who I Am: The Man Behind the Badge. I know him and his wife as retired and living in the mountains, away from the city life and as parents of kids the same age as my younger 2. I have known Jeff & Susan for over a decade. I know him as a caring father, a man who has many hobbies and enjoys spending time with his wife. I knew he was a retired police officer and Susan a retired communications supervisor. He talked very, very little about his past life as a police officer.


Until I read this book, I can honestly say I had no idea the details or the types of calls he took on a daily basis. This book is a collection of memories that paint a picture of what it was like to live as a police officer on a daily basis from the training academy to retirement. Jeff does an amazing job of putting you in the passenger seat for a ride-along. It is written in a way that you don't want to put it down, you want to continue to read, but also in a way that you can put it down and pick it up again when you decide to want to jump back into some of the calls and feel the emotions he is going through. Some of the memories will stick with you and you will relate to some of the people you are introduced to along the way.


Jeff is a kind man and has seen more than I ever will in my life, more than most people will ever see. To live that life and to come out the other side was not easy. I don't believe I will ever look at a police officer the same way. Even in small-town life, I know the police officers deal with more than I care to think about. It takes good people, like Jeff Shaw, to keep us all protected and safe. Thank you to Jeff and all of the first responders.

[Coco.V]

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[Rona Simmons · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have met Jeff Shaw and shared a few thoughts about what it is to become an author, to finish a book and see it held in a friend or a stranger’s hands as they delve into the person behind the words. It’s not a profession for the timid or those who lack self-confidence. But then, it is not policework, one truly demanding of both those and many other skills. And Jeff has those in abundance as the book makes clear.
In one sense the book is a journal of the wide range of experiences of a cop, from traffic tickets to domestic abuse to suicides and homicides and riots—things the public cannot begin to imagine and which Shaw helps us see.
Shaw’s timing could not have been better, yes, the book came on the market just as the economy was shutting down due to the corona virus, but it arrived in time to give everyone a sense of what the police face when they stand firm as they are vilified by protestors, many of whom are thinly disguised anarchists with a different agenda there just to take advantage of the situation.
Shaw remarks that writing the book has in part been therapeutic, helping to put his experience in perspective and dampen the horrors he has witnessed and images that still haunt him. He has every right to be proud of his accomplishments – behind the badge and in front of the keyboard.

[RN · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read Aug, 2020. I wish the idiots that want to defund the police would read this

Thank you Jeff for your service! I can't imagine what Susan went through each time you went to work. Being a dispatcher, she knew how bad it can get. With the protests, riots, violence, & murders in the Democrat run States and Cities, crying to defund the police, now is definitely the time to read this book, support our men and women in the force and re-elect our sitting President!
I was deputy coroner for 2 years in a county just outside of Jackson County Missouri in the late 1990s. The Jackson County Medical Examiner did our autopsies and assisted with murder investigations at that time, then took over the coroner duties in 2000. A lot of the stuffing of feelings that was mentioned in this book is very true. Humor is used to cover those feelings with NO disrespect intended for the deceased or their families. As a RN, it was the last thing I ever thought I would do, but am glad for that experience and perspective. Definitely recommend this book

[Timothy Smallwood · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great view into the lives of those most unappreciated

I have used this book as a tool to wind down in the evenings, but it has done so much more than that for me. I have always appreciated law enforcement for the work that they do. However, I have never fully known the extent of their sacrifice. This book led me to love and support our men and women in blue on a completely higher level and I hope it does the same for you.

Be prepared for mild language and graphic portrayal of gruesome scenes. This comes with the territory.

[Indie Author Book Reviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

This gripping book is written by a retired Hialeah Police Department officer that spent 26 years in law enforcement. It is gritty, harsh, and graphic, but is a true representation of the daily life of an officer during that turbulent time. Jeff Shaw holds nothing back as he shares his life and work. This book will change your view of law enforcement. I hope you, like my family, back the blue.

****full disclosure**** I am a retired dispatcher, and my son is in law enforcement. This book strikes close to home.

[Sandy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Real world view the work of a police officer

This book is an excellent read, documenting the day to day encounters of a police officer. The brief synapses of these encounters is enough to give the reader a view into the daily challenges a police officer must deal with. Thank you for your service sir!

[Raberta Beckwith · Rating 5 out of 5]

Eye opening !

I have always been supportive of our officers in blue, definitely respectful. I have friends that are officers and troopers,and I am always amazed how they can compartmentalize things...I think writing this book is a good thing for you AND for us ! Thank you for your service and best wishes ! 🌈🌈🌈

[Jennifer Clayton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you for sharing parts of yourself with your readers. Your time spent in law enforcement is greatly appreciated and I thank you for your service. Definitely recommend this book to anyone who has an appreciation for our men and women in law enforcement and a curiosity at a look behind the shield.

[Lisa S · Rating 5 out of 5]

How fortuitous that a book like this came out when it did. At a time when so many people have negative views of law enforcement officers as a group, few outside the profession can truly imagine the realities officers experience every day. If we did, perhaps we would view them with greater understanding, compassion, and gratitude.

Jeff Shaw, now a retiree, walks the reader down memory lane and revisits the daily horrors of the job. When the rest of us flee from the scene of danger or tragedy, Jeff shows us how, every day, he and his fellow officers and other first responders buck every instinct of self-preservation and race towards it instead—sometimes with tragic consequences to themselves. There’s a reason why, across all professions, rates of depression and suicide are among the highest in law enforcement; it’s evident from almost the first page how the job takes a toll on its officers.

Gut-wrenching, heart-breaking, and difficult to put down—but deserving of careful reading and reflection—the book is a brave, untinted window into the soul of a man whose noble desire to serve and protect made him, by definition, a hero, but also stripped away from him the safety and comfort that the rest of us blindly take for granted. Jeff witnessed horrors from the dark side of human nature. May the act of telling us his story bring him healing and peace, and may it teach understanding and compassion to those of us who have not witnessed such horrors ourselves.

[SpareTheBS · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book got me in all the feels. As a retired LEO who happens to be very familiar with Hialeah and Miami-Dade, I not only read the words on the page but also visualized the scene. This book made me angry (mostly from the internal BS of any police department), sad (from the kids that are victims of their parents evil), happy ( who can't smile when reading about Aunt Bee) and tears (9/11)

Anyone that wants to know what it's like to handle a call from the time it's received on the radio until the time you clear the call (all without commercials), check out WHO I AM. Retired Sgt Shaw takes you along in his car and saves you from the "aroma" of the death calls.

Thanks Mr Shaw for writing this book and bringing back a lot of memories that I thought were forgotten. Some of the cases that you wrote about I have vague recollection of and it triggered some old memories of my own experiences. Be Safe Always.

[Tan Van Huizen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Compelling, gritty, and visceral. This is the ultimate police ride-along over a 24-year career in law enforcement. I felt as though I was in the squad car with the author policing the streets of Hialeah, answering the call on missing persons, domestics, suicides, and murder. But this read is more than that, you get an inside look of how experiencing traumatic events can carry with you even long after an officer’s career is over, where “turning it off” seems an impossibility—because some experiences are forever. I highly recommend Who I Am: The Man Behind the Badge.

[Kim Gardner · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thoroughly enjoyed this book. I met the author at my book club for another one of his books and was very impressed with his writing and his story telling. This book did not disappoint. It is a book about his stories as a police officer/detective/etc. Everyone should read this book so you can feel and understand what they go through and see in their careers. They deserve so much respect and appreciation! I would recommend his books to everyone!

[chuck Munchbach · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thanks

Appreciate your service, REALLY,but,stop over thinking what has happened.
If what you've wrote is the truth as you know it, you did what you could.
I've never been in your shoes.
Let it go, sir.

[Jaana Louise · Rating 4 out of 5]

Absolutely fascinating! No filler unless it relates to what is going to be told. Just bam, bam, bam, this is what I saw, this is what I experienced. Sometimes gory but not to be glorifying, it's just telling what the author went through. A very insightful read

[William Judge · Rating 5 out of 5]

Jeff Shaw holds nothing back in these stories from the street. Well written from an honest heart.

[Danice H · Rating 5 out of 5]

So good!

One of the best memoirs I have read about policing. It's easy to watch TV series that aren't real, or even the shows that are real, but rarely are they from the first responder point of view. Thoroughly enjoyed the read and the author's style.