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Ну и тварь ты, Вишковитц
Я, Вишковитц, был микробом. "Важен не размер, Вишковитц, - говорили мне, - Важно быть самим собой". Как будто это так просто. Не успел я полюбить свое имя, как уже стал двумя микробами, Вишко и Витц. А уж что говорить, когда превратился в четыре: Ви, Шко, Ви и Тц. Я разваливался на части. Мы все были немножко такими в докембрии. "Что поделать, - поговаривали, -жизнь такая". Мне казался более подходящим термин "обмен веществ".
208 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 1998
42 people are currently reading
1118 people want to read
About the author
Alessandro Boffa
10 books13 followersI worked as a biologist for two years, in a lab where I had to titillate frogs and rats to collect their eggs and semen. It didn't exactly match the romantic dreams I had about science. I switched my field of interest to the human brain and worked on a mathematical model of the cerebral cortex and thought processes. Continuously thinking about thinking managed to drive me crazy and so, one day, during the financial boom of 1986 I made some money on the stock exchange and left for a three-week vacation that lasted some eleven years, one in California and ten in East Asia. I took a diploma in gemology in Bangkok and started dealing precious stones, then I spent five years in a little island in Thailand, running some bungalows and a little restaurant, but mostly fishing, reading and watching videotapes. What did I like about Asia? The people, their being so different from me. For instance I liked their habit of referring to themselves in the third person. Someone might say to you, "Yang thinks you are stupid," and you'll ask "Who's Yang?" and he'll say, "I'm Yang," with a smile, because he's not offending you, Yang is. It's the same attitude an actor has with his part, he doesn't identify with it and can always get out. It's a very healthy habit that allows you to relax and laugh at yourself. The difference between tragic and comic is in the point of view: your troubles are tragic, somebody else's are comic. So laughing becomes a sort of spiritual exercise in relinquishing your ego. I believe that every tragic story has a comic "translation" that is harder to put together, but that says the same things in a more effective way. To me, good comedy, laughter that overcomes tragedy, is the highest form of art, and good comedians are saints. And then I like the japanese practise of "mu," of seeking enlightenment in a cup of tea, even if I don't like tea.
At some point, I started writing postcards to my friends. One of them, my best pal ever since, found my mail interesting and suggested I write something longer. So I did a travel article about my riding a camel in Sinai, a camel called Bob Marley who never took me where I wanted but always went in pursuit of lady camels. While doing that, in the middle of a particular sentence, I suddenly realized that writing could be something fun. I don't remember the particular sentence, I only know that it seemed to be written by someone else. It was a revelation to me that I could be someone else. It was a revelation to me that you don't have to be a nice person to write something nice. Sometimes mistakes do happen, and stringing them together you may fool even the toughest of critics. (Actually it takes a while to realize that what looks sublime to the writer is usually just another piece of trash to the reader. When you see a piece of quartz in the dirt it looks like you've found the shining eyeballs of the universe, but when you take it to the jeweler. . .) Anyway, I consider this business of writing pretty much like kamasutra: the art of giving pleasure, of taking you to a place where everything is wonderful, like when you are a kid, or in love, or traveling, or about to die (though coming back from a place where everything is horrible is just as good). As in love talk, it doesn't really matter what you say, however perverted, but only what it feels Iike. As opposed to science: I always thought that science was serious business and real knowledge, while fiction was more like playing around. I still feel that way but now I'd rather play around. Trying to create, to give birth to something (not surprisingly, the favorite pastime of all animals) is frightfully more fun than trying to explain or even to understand. This novel I wrote surely isn't about the meaning of life. If something is funny or beautiful it already is the meaning of life.
At some point, I started writing postcards to my friends. One of them, my best pal ever since, found my mail interesting and suggested I write something longer. So I did a travel article about my riding a camel in Sinai, a camel called Bob Marley who never took me where I wanted but always went in pursuit of lady camels. While doing that, in the middle of a particular sentence, I suddenly realized that writing could be something fun. I don't remember the particular sentence, I only know that it seemed to be written by someone else. It was a revelation to me that I could be someone else. It was a revelation to me that you don't have to be a nice person to write something nice. Sometimes mistakes do happen, and stringing them together you may fool even the toughest of critics. (Actually it takes a while to realize that what looks sublime to the writer is usually just another piece of trash to the reader. When you see a piece of quartz in the dirt it looks like you've found the shining eyeballs of the universe, but when you take it to the jeweler. . .) Anyway, I consider this business of writing pretty much like kamasutra: the art of giving pleasure, of taking you to a place where everything is wonderful, like when you are a kid, or in love, or traveling, or about to die (though coming back from a place where everything is horrible is just as good). As in love talk, it doesn't really matter what you say, however perverted, but only what it feels Iike. As opposed to science: I always thought that science was serious business and real knowledge, while fiction was more like playing around. I still feel that way but now I'd rather play around. Trying to create, to give birth to something (not surprisingly, the favorite pastime of all animals) is frightfully more fun than trying to explain or even to understand. This novel I wrote surely isn't about the meaning of life. If something is funny or beautiful it already is the meaning of life.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 184 reviews
July 3, 2021
Videorecensione: https://youtu.be/c_YJ6Kqs9bk
November 15, 2014
“Papà, voglio smettere di bere.”
“Non dire sciocchezze, Visko, sei una spugna”.
“Com’era papà?”, chiesi a mia madre.
“Croccante, un po’ salato, ricco di fibre.”
“Prima di mangiartelo, voglio dire”.
“Era un tipino insicuro, ansioso, nevrotico, un po’ come tutti voi maschietti, Visko”.
“Fu proprio per mettere le cose bene in chiaro che le ultime parole di mia madre prima di essere scannata furono:Ricorda sempre quello che sei, figliolo: un porco. Cerca sempre di mangiare porcherie, fare il porcaccione e pensare porcate. Fa sì che la tua casa sia un vero porcile, e con tutti quanti fa sempre il tuo porco comodo, come quel gran maiale di tuo padre.”
“Con i propri figli, comunque, è buona regola comunicare il meno possibile, limitarsi a semplici precetti come: “Non dite volgarità –si fa prima a farle o Non mentite-rischiate di dir la verità oppure Non dite mai: Attento, amico, è un’esca –fate prima a farvi un nuovo amico”.
“Il dramma di essere un vegetale era l’impossibilità di suicidarsi. Il vantaggio di essere una spugna era la possibilità di berci sopra”.
Sono solo alcune delle perle che questo libro fantastico, che unisce la preparazione scientifica del biologo con un forte spirito umoristico, offre: attraverso le brevi storie di animali diversi, dal leone all’alce fino al pesce rosso e al microbo, tutti Viskovitz, innanzitutto si imparano cose che non si sapevano sul regno animale, e poi, dietro le storie dai toni sempre ironici, ma anche pungenti e a volte amari, vengono trattati temi animalisti quali l’utilizzo delle cavie di laboratorio e la cattività degli animali selvatici nei parchi africani. In tutti i brevi racconti viene descritta la difficile lotta per essere animali, che finisce sempre in un modo: nel diventare delle bestie.
Da leggere.
“Non dire sciocchezze, Visko, sei una spugna”.
“Com’era papà?”, chiesi a mia madre.
“Croccante, un po’ salato, ricco di fibre.”
“Prima di mangiartelo, voglio dire”.
“Era un tipino insicuro, ansioso, nevrotico, un po’ come tutti voi maschietti, Visko”.
“Fu proprio per mettere le cose bene in chiaro che le ultime parole di mia madre prima di essere scannata furono:Ricorda sempre quello che sei, figliolo: un porco. Cerca sempre di mangiare porcherie, fare il porcaccione e pensare porcate. Fa sì che la tua casa sia un vero porcile, e con tutti quanti fa sempre il tuo porco comodo, come quel gran maiale di tuo padre.”
“Con i propri figli, comunque, è buona regola comunicare il meno possibile, limitarsi a semplici precetti come: “Non dite volgarità –si fa prima a farle o Non mentite-rischiate di dir la verità oppure Non dite mai: Attento, amico, è un’esca –fate prima a farvi un nuovo amico”.
“Il dramma di essere un vegetale era l’impossibilità di suicidarsi. Il vantaggio di essere una spugna era la possibilità di berci sopra”.
Sono solo alcune delle perle che questo libro fantastico, che unisce la preparazione scientifica del biologo con un forte spirito umoristico, offre: attraverso le brevi storie di animali diversi, dal leone all’alce fino al pesce rosso e al microbo, tutti Viskovitz, innanzitutto si imparano cose che non si sapevano sul regno animale, e poi, dietro le storie dai toni sempre ironici, ma anche pungenti e a volte amari, vengono trattati temi animalisti quali l’utilizzo delle cavie di laboratorio e la cattività degli animali selvatici nei parchi africani. In tutti i brevi racconti viene descritta la difficile lotta per essere animali, che finisce sempre in un modo: nel diventare delle bestie.
Da leggere.
July 29, 2021
Oooh! Fermate tutto! Questo libro è entrato a gamba tesa nei libri più belli letti negli ultimi anni e nessuno ne parla, in pochissimi lo conoscono. Com'è possibile?
Sei una bestia Viskovitz è un'opera difficile da classificare. È un romanzo, ma strutturato come fosse una raccolta di racconti, dove in ogni capitolo ritroviamo il nostro protagonista Viskovitz, insieme ai suoi comprimari, sempre in una diversa forma animale e alle prese con nuovi problemi, animalistici e non solo. Sfruttando le sue conoscenze biologiche, Boffa, usa questo espediente per sviscerare in ogni racconto un differente aspetto dell'essere umano: l'amore, la passione, la famiglia, la vanità, l'egoismo, l'ambizione, la morte... In poco meno di 200 pagine percorriamo una vita intera attraverso molteplici "bestie", il tutto accompagnato da un umorismo pungente e sagace capace di far riflettere.
Mi rendo conto di averlo descritto malissimo, ma come si fa a descrivere un libro impossibile?
Fatevi un favore e leggetelo. ❤️
Sei una bestia Viskovitz è un'opera difficile da classificare. È un romanzo, ma strutturato come fosse una raccolta di racconti, dove in ogni capitolo ritroviamo il nostro protagonista Viskovitz, insieme ai suoi comprimari, sempre in una diversa forma animale e alle prese con nuovi problemi, animalistici e non solo. Sfruttando le sue conoscenze biologiche, Boffa, usa questo espediente per sviscerare in ogni racconto un differente aspetto dell'essere umano: l'amore, la passione, la famiglia, la vanità, l'egoismo, l'ambizione, la morte... In poco meno di 200 pagine percorriamo una vita intera attraverso molteplici "bestie", il tutto accompagnato da un umorismo pungente e sagace capace di far riflettere.
Mi rendo conto di averlo descritto malissimo, ma come si fa a descrivere un libro impossibile?
Fatevi un favore e leggetelo. ❤️
February 9, 2011
The more I think about it... the more I absolutely LOVE this book.... it has, without a doubt, become one of my favorites. The best part is- each story is individual- so skipping around, re-reading, or getting a quick-wit literary fix are all possible options with this book.
great idea(s). great voice. creative concept. Fantastic book.
****For those of you having trouble "getting-in-to-it"... skip to another chapter!!! It's not a linear plot- it's a book of fable-esque and very separate short stories. And to be honest- the first real story (dreaming squirrel/mouse dude) is a bit slow and I think was misplaced in the ordering of the stories.... once you get a feel for what Boffa is all about, you can go back to it and love it.
Enjoy!
great idea(s). great voice. creative concept. Fantastic book.
****For those of you having trouble "getting-in-to-it"... skip to another chapter!!! It's not a linear plot- it's a book of fable-esque and very separate short stories. And to be honest- the first real story (dreaming squirrel/mouse dude) is a bit slow and I think was misplaced in the ordering of the stories.... once you get a feel for what Boffa is all about, you can go back to it and love it.
Enjoy!
July 7, 2021
Delizioso libricino! Spassosissimo ma anche molto arguto, descrive il mondo animale senza lesinare frecciatine ironiche a quello umano. L'ho trovato molto simile a "Il libro dei mostri" di Wilcock. Consigliatissimi entrambi.
April 26, 2013
A few years ago, Olivia Judson burst onto the scene with Dr Tatiana's Sex Advice To All Creation. Various animals wrote to this biological agony-aunt asking for tips for better sex and procreation, and she gave them very pertinent advice. How to avoid being eaten by your mate after sex was one important topic, especially when you are a few hundred times smaller than her. A successful television show followed.
A bit later, Isabella Rossellini got into the act with her online series of videos titled 'Green Porno', which explored the sex lives of various fauna. These were gross yet funny; I watched one or two.
It turns out that the very clever Alessandro Boffa beat both women to it with his exploration of love, obsession and beastly antics, You're an Animal, Viskovitz. The hapless Viskovitz is desperately in love with the seductive Ljuba, but no matter what his incarnation - a mantis, a shark, a sponge, a scorpion - he is constantly thwarted, either by his bad timing, or biology, or the pressures from his friends or competitors (and it's always the same trio: Lopez, Zucotic, Petrovic). The wondrous Ljuba makes eyes at him, yet invariably he has to settle for the homely Jana. Animal behaviour to illustrate the human condition can be dry and academic, but Boffa, a biologist by training, has a facility with expression and superb humour, and this is lovely, whimsical stuff.
A bit later, Isabella Rossellini got into the act with her online series of videos titled 'Green Porno', which explored the sex lives of various fauna. These were gross yet funny; I watched one or two.
It turns out that the very clever Alessandro Boffa beat both women to it with his exploration of love, obsession and beastly antics, You're an Animal, Viskovitz. The hapless Viskovitz is desperately in love with the seductive Ljuba, but no matter what his incarnation - a mantis, a shark, a sponge, a scorpion - he is constantly thwarted, either by his bad timing, or biology, or the pressures from his friends or competitors (and it's always the same trio: Lopez, Zucotic, Petrovic). The wondrous Ljuba makes eyes at him, yet invariably he has to settle for the homely Jana. Animal behaviour to illustrate the human condition can be dry and academic, but Boffa, a biologist by training, has a facility with expression and superb humour, and this is lovely, whimsical stuff.
March 23, 2016
Certos livros, depois de pegar neles numa livraria, já não os consigo voltar a colocar na prateleira; virar costas como se nunca nos tivéssemos cruzado. Assim que peguei em És Um Animal, Viskovitz!, soube que sairíamos juntos da loja.
Pequeno, veloz, simples, este livro vai imediatamente para a secção onde guardo os meus livros preferidos… e por motivos bem diferentes dos seus colegas de estante. Mantendo-se fiel às características taxonómicas de Visko em cada uma das suas existências, Boffa pinta quadros hilariantes; a adaptação de Visko aos temperamentos e susceptibilidades da espécie, sem necessariamente se conformar com as respectivas limitações, é mesmo muito cómica!
Não apreciei as diferentes vidas de Visko sempre com a mesma intensidade - tenho as minhas preferidas -, mas a genialidade do escritor e o seu extraordinário sentido de humor tornam todo o trabalho digno de nota, do início ao fim. E, em relação a não ser apenas palavreado absurdo e divertido sobre vários seres vivos - e não digo animais porque se Boffa for um bocadinho como alguns biólogos que conheci enervar-se-ia a valer por estarmos a colocar todos estes Viskos no mesmo Reino - não saberia dizer melhor que o resumo supra: é "um livro sobre a vida observada a partir de vinte pontos de vista diferentes."
Vale bem a pena!
Pequeno, veloz, simples, este livro vai imediatamente para a secção onde guardo os meus livros preferidos… e por motivos bem diferentes dos seus colegas de estante. Mantendo-se fiel às características taxonómicas de Visko em cada uma das suas existências, Boffa pinta quadros hilariantes; a adaptação de Visko aos temperamentos e susceptibilidades da espécie, sem necessariamente se conformar com as respectivas limitações, é mesmo muito cómica!
Não apreciei as diferentes vidas de Visko sempre com a mesma intensidade - tenho as minhas preferidas -, mas a genialidade do escritor e o seu extraordinário sentido de humor tornam todo o trabalho digno de nota, do início ao fim. E, em relação a não ser apenas palavreado absurdo e divertido sobre vários seres vivos - e não digo animais porque se Boffa for um bocadinho como alguns biólogos que conheci enervar-se-ia a valer por estarmos a colocar todos estes Viskos no mesmo Reino - não saberia dizer melhor que o resumo supra: é "um livro sobre a vida observada a partir de vinte pontos de vista diferentes."
Vale bem a pena!
July 28, 2015
Vrlo neuobičajena knjiga. Pravo malo remek djelo. Ako volite Kafkin preobražaj ova knjiga bit će vam pravo književno osvježenje. Zanimljivo je koliko se ljudskih karaktera može iščitati iz životinjskog svijeta… Knjiga za sve generacije, topla preporuka :)
March 22, 2023
«Για να είναι κανείς πρωτότυπος, πρέπει να επιστρέψει στις ρίζες του, σαύρα. Το μυστικό για να είσαι ο εαυτός σου, είναι να ξέρεις να παραιτείσαι. Να αδειάζεις και να αφήνεσαι και πάλι να γεμίζεις. Αν ξέρεις να το κανείς, τότε, ιδού! Τα χρώματα σου θα αρχίσουν να μιλάνε, και στη θέση του ερωτηματικό στο τέλος αυτού του γελοίου ονόματος, θα μπορέσεις να βάλεις ένα θαυμαστικό. Εγώ είμαι η Λιούμπα!»
February 6, 2016
I read the prologue, and immediately knew that I would like this book. A collection of short stories starring the protagonist Viskovitz as a different animal/insect each time - but always searching for admiration, for sex, for that beloved truelove, Ljuba. One of my favourites was as a quixotic genocidal scorpion, another as a sponge sporting a rather disturbing sex scene. The stories are usually hilarious, with an (given who he is in each story) absurdly astute and scheming protagonist - mastering a scientific language he should be nowhere near of comprehending.
January apparently means good books for me. If you like the prologue, and a bit of dark comedy, get the book. A light winter read.
January apparently means good books for me. If you like the prologue, and a bit of dark comedy, get the book. A light winter read.
April 23, 2025
4 stelline e mezzo.
In Sei una bestia, Viskovitz, Alessandro Boffa ci regala venti racconti surreali e geniali in cui il protagonista cambia specie, vivendo esperienze sempre diverse. Un mix perfetto tra ironia, scienza e introspezione, con uno stile che richiama Woody Allen e le favole più brillanti.
Tra ghiri che governano i sogni e cani buddisti, l'autore crea un universo surreale e irresistibile. Un’opera unica nel vero senso della parola.
📖 La mia recensione completa su My World...
In Sei una bestia, Viskovitz, Alessandro Boffa ci regala venti racconti surreali e geniali in cui il protagonista cambia specie, vivendo esperienze sempre diverse. Un mix perfetto tra ironia, scienza e introspezione, con uno stile che richiama Woody Allen e le favole più brillanti.
Tra ghiri che governano i sogni e cani buddisti, l'autore crea un universo surreale e irresistibile. Un’opera unica nel vero senso della parola.
📖 La mia recensione completa su My World...
January 5, 2009
I loved it! Absolutely wonderful! Funny, witty, interesting and intelligently written! One of my favorites, by far! Now-a-days I read it for my pre-husband when going to bed. And he laughs out load, and loves it just as much as I do!
Read
September 17, 2022librino davvero spiritoso!!!
June 16, 2025
Enjoyed this immensely—very much Cosmicomics vibes
June 21, 2008
A 4.5 star effort. An odd (in a good way), quirky book about Viskovitz and his adventures on the ladder of evolution, or more accurately, reincarnation. The book is made up of very-short short stories, in each of which Viskovitz is a different animal/insect (though always male). And in each story, he mates/tries to mate with the love of his life, while participating in the rat-race (no pun intended) of daily existence. Written by a biologist, there is enough science here that the whole book is quite believable in its own way, but there is also enough creative license taken by the author that it never loses its charm and creativity. Though the main premise reminded me of Pelevin's The Life of Insects, the satire in this book is not as biting or dark and much more playful and amusing. A fast read and definitely recommended for those tired of reading "heavy" books.
January 13, 2025
Stupendo,bellissimo.
Ben scritto,divertente ,brillante,originale.
Una vera chicca.
Mentre si leggono questi racconti non si può che pensare:chi l'ha scritto è un genio!
Mi è piaciuto tantissimo,non volevo finisse.
Ben scritto,divertente ,brillante,originale.
Una vera chicca.
Mentre si leggono questi racconti non si può che pensare:chi l'ha scritto è un genio!
Mi è piaciuto tantissimo,non volevo finisse.
June 4, 2007
This is a really funny clever book, written by a biologist, and what he does is use the mating habits of all these different species of animals to reflect on the ridiculousness, the tragedy, the beauty, and the futility of the human animal's mating games. Viskovitz, in the various interconnected stories in this book, is at times a shark, a rat, a lion, a praying mantis, a pig, an ant, a bee...and his fumblings in all these forms to find love-and-sex, sex-and-love, are both hilarious and tragic. It's a really terrific, creative book, guaranteed to both delight and horrify. Watch out for self-impregnating, hermaphroditic snails!
February 16, 2013
One of my favourite books, and best Prologue ever!
So there we were on that ice floe, just the two of us, adrift in the polar night. Viskovitz turned and said 'I'd like you to get our conversation down in black and white.'
'It's not possible,' I said. 'I'm no typist. I'm not a writer. I'm a penguin. As far as I'm concerned, "getting it down in black and white" means making more penguins.'
So instead there I was a month later, standing still with an egg under my belly, remembering...
I was the one who brought up the subject.
So there we were on that ice floe, just the two of us, adrift in the polar night. Viskovitz turned and said 'I'd like you to get our conversation down in black and white.'
'It's not possible,' I said. 'I'm no typist. I'm not a writer. I'm a penguin. As far as I'm concerned, "getting it down in black and white" means making more penguins.'
So instead there I was a month later, standing still with an egg under my belly, remembering...
I was the one who brought up the subject.
September 4, 2017
This is an excellent collection of short stories which reveal more about the human condition through animals than most literature can achieve with thousands of words about human characters. It's also hilarious, and has a good book's rare ability to make you laugh out loud. From the drug dog addicted to the drugs he's trained to find, to the lion in love with the antelope he should eat, and a sponge that ends up mating with itself and every family member it has in an incestuous flurry, this book has it all.
August 28, 2008
Ok, this is a great book. It is a collection of short stories about Viskovitz, who is in love with a female called Ljuba. But, the problem is: they are not human! In each story, they belong to different animal species. So we get a peek into love-related problems of bugs, sponges, fish, sharks, snails and so on... each story is really funny and philosophic.
September 24, 2014
Okay. It was a fun read. Basically, it takes Ovid's metamorphosis and follow a male named Viskovitz through his romantic pursuit of a mate named Ljuba in the bodies of many different species. It's weirdly a little sexist in the lion section, but it's pretty funny. The stories are pretty funny, and some are very short, so it makes for a quick read.
March 14, 2016
2,5 sterren.
Het is een leuk en grappig boek, ook de invalshoek vond ik origineel. Maar weinig afwisseling in schrijf- en vertelstijl. Vandaar dat ik het boek een minder goede score geef; het werd nogal voorspelbaar.
Het is een leuk en grappig boek, ook de invalshoek vond ik origineel. Maar weinig afwisseling in schrijf- en vertelstijl. Vandaar dat ik het boek een minder goede score geef; het werd nogal voorspelbaar.
August 31, 2009
A funny mix of fables, irony, satire, human typology and delicious language. I loled a lot, which is, I think, the ultimate aim of it.
July 11, 2025
Surreale e divertentissimo.
April 9, 2018
Un libro muy muy original y divertido. En cada cuento Visko es un animal diferente y el autor juega con las características físicas y el comportamiento de la especie en cada capitulo, logrando creaciones muy interesantes que si no te hacen reir al menos te sacan una sonrisa. *Spoiler* Poe ejemplo en un capitulo Visco es una mantis pequeña que le pregunta a su madre cómo era su padre. A lo que ella responde "Muy crujiente y lleno de proteínas". Cada capitulo tiene alguna genialidad como esa.
Es cortito y se lee de un tirón, aunque yo lei uno o dos por día para disfrutarlo mas. No se lo pierdan!!!
Es cortito y se lee de un tirón, aunque yo lei uno o dos por día para disfrutarlo mas. No se lo pierdan!!!
June 4, 2017
A superb book which was recommended to me by my friend for our book club.
September 25, 2021
(3.5) Hilarious, Viskovitz!
December 19, 2021
Che sorpresa questo libriccino, mi ha proprio fatto divertire!
January 2, 2025
il mio desiderio è che questo libro diventi un classico
Displaying 1 - 30 of 184 reviews