Introduction: I remember the man, and I remembered how he and his program made me feel: completely seen, completely loved. I feel as if I have always known him, like he was a part of my becoming. Fred enrolled at Western Theological Seminary in Pittsburgh and began taking classes on his lunch hour. He was given special charge to minister to children and families through television. His message was I like you just the way you are and let’s grow together from there. I’ve simply tried to be open to the possibilities God has made available to me.
1/Childhood, Love, and Fear: Freddy missed school regularly due to illness and was overweight as a child and was teased by bullies. He didn’t forget what it was like to be fat Freddy. He created an intimate world of safety and calm. He didn’t ask children to stop being afraid, he gave them his loving presence.
2/The First Neighborhood: His dad served his employees and his mom served the community. They established the McFeely-Rogers Foundation. Fred called Latrobe ‘the garden spot of the world.’ (garden of eden)
3/Adolescence and Acceptance: Fred took homework to Jim Stumbaugh (football captain) in the hospital and they became friends (teasing stopped). Fred was voted most likely to succeed in his class. In the New Testament we read of Jesus’s empathy for those people who felt their own lives to be imperfect, and the marvelous surprise and joy when they sensed his great acceptance. When we hear the word that we are not lovable we are not hearing the word of God. He received thank you letters from kids, young adults, and parents of kids.
4/College Years, Loneliness, and Musical Expression: Fred found Dartmouth to be cold and transferred to Rollins. Fred majored in music composition and minored in French. Life is for service (marble engraving there). Through out his life, Fred used music to express how he felt, and he invited his television neighbors into that practice. This became a key part of his ministry with children and families as he urged them to offer their full, honest, selves to the world.
5/Formation in New York City: During spring break he went home and watched TV for the first time (they were throwing pies in each other’s faces). He thought it would be a wonderful tool for education and wondered why it was being used in that way. Fred’s transition into television work began with a significant YES (television) and a significant NO (seminary). The first 2 years of his television career, were full of significant choices – yeses or noes that would shape Fred’s entire life. We are molded by our actions and our rituals; the shape we take in each moment has everything to do with what we have spent all our previous moments doing. He said no to greater speed, more money, and higher ratings, he said yes to quieter goods; thoughtfulness, intentionality, and his own intuition and imagination for the work. He always stopped to share a kind word with people who sought his attention or offered him care-sometimes to the point of annoyance. Fred did not get impatient. Gabby Hayes show star (Gabby Hayes) said when he is filming he thinks of that one little buckaroo. When Fred looks at the camera he thinks of one person.
6/Whimsey and Seriousness on Children’s Corner: Fred was whimsical (making up puppet shows as a sick child) and serious (thoughtful and exploring deep questions). Fred and Josie produced 5 – 1 hour episodes each week. Josie and Daniel (puppet tiger) would have deep conversations on the show. Josie wanted to be an entertainer to children and Fred wanted to teach them. In Fred’s mind, seriousness must sometimes temper whimsey. Fred Rogers saw God everywhere and perhaps this is what made him serious and whimsical in equal measure. He saw God in the open and vulnerable hearts and minds of the children watching his programs, and so he worried about choosing just the right words and storylines to honor the time they and their families had entrusted to him.
7/Graduate Studies and Life-Transforming Teachers: Fred enrolled at Western Theological Seminary and took one class at a time during his lunch. Dr. Orr loved him right through seminary. Evil will do anything to make you feel as bad as you possibly can about yourself because if you feel the worst about who you are, you will undoubtedly look with evil eyes on your neighbor and you will get to believe the worst about him or her (Dr. Orr). Accuse yourself. Accuse your neighbor. Get your neighbor to accuse somebody else, and the evil spreads and thrives. Jesus will do anything to remind us that we are lovable and our neighbor is lovable too! Jesus reminds us that we are God’s, which means we are good, which means our neighbor, who is also God’s is also good. Goodness can spread and thrive too. This is why Mr. Roger’s had a ‘neighborhood.’ Margret McFarland: I don’t want you to teach sculpting. I want you simply to sit with the children and do what you feel you would like to do with the clay. Just love the clay in front of the children. The kids started using clay in the most wonderful ways. And that wouldn’t have happened if this gifted sculptor hadn’t loved clay right in front of them. Attitudes aren’t taught; they’re caught. Fred Rogers loved a lot of things in front of the children: feelings, conversation, clarity, people of so many sizes and shapes and colors. And, of course, he loved the children themselves. Maybe they would find themselves lovable like he did.
8/Canada, Fatherhood, and Separation: Fred moved to Canada for the misterrogers show. He tells about his son going for surgery and how the hospital staff took his son and put him in a cage crib and took him away crying. Afterward he emerged anxious and accident prone. One morning in the hospital crippled his son emotionally. Mr. Roger’s devoted several shows to topics of separation, preventing trauma, and alleviating anxiety.
9/Television and the Church: If television could so effectively teach, connect, and resource then the church should be a part of it. Fred was certainly disgusted with what children’s television was often used for – demeaning treatment of others, advertising, villains. Fred believed that television had enormous capacity for good, he necessarily believed it had equal capacity for harm.
10/Change, Fear, and Peace: Neighborhood of make believe is rearranged and it leads to fear and thoughts of war. Mr. Rogers talks about change there and in the world (Vietnam, Martin Luther King). The message was if you make a change that affects a child, you talk about it. Fred cared about the root cause of so many conflicts: change and the fear of it. He cared about what was happening on the inside of people as the met those changes with joy, curiosity, fear, or uncertainty. He cared- what people did with those feelings, because behaviors have consequences to individuals, to their neighbors, and to their neighborhoods of whatever size they may be. If we are going to develop generations of emotionally intelligent adults, we must address the emotional needs of the children who will become them. Isn’t peace wonderful?
11/Neighborhood Liturgy: Inarguably, we are shaped by it; whatever we do again and again, in the same order, in the same kind of ways. Freddy Rogers spent every Sunday of his childhood at Latrobe Presbyterian Church. It is no wonder that when Fred designed his own program in his own neighborhood, he built both out of liturgies: the music, aerial shot of neighborhood, opening the door, put on sneakers & sweater. It is no stretch at all to say that Fred believed his visits with his television neighbors to be times of holy exchange. Fred was a man of liturgy away from the neighborhood as well: rose early, read his Bible, went swimming, weighed himself – 143 pounds, and kept his same schedule in other time zones as well. Mr. Rogers was a program (not a show) that families used (did not watch). He avoided first person: our work, our offices, our home, our family, our sons.
12/Parables of the Kingdom: I think it is really tough to talk about spiritual things. It can’t simply be talked about. Jesus himself used parables, so I guess that is our directive. King Friday buys parts for bombs because he thinks another neighborhood (Southwood) has already started building bombs. Turns out the parts were for a bridge so they could come and meet them. (During the Vietnam war). When Mister Rogers called his viewers neighbors, he was playing out his own greatest parable: calling us, gently but firmly into lives of mercy and care of one another. He knew we wouldn’t always get it right, that we are prone, to bow to fear and to serve competition, to privilege our own safety and to neglect other’s real needs. Maybe in calling us neighbors, he knew he was calling us something better than we actually were. But maybe he believed that if he got to us while we were young, if he told us, again and again, that we are good, that we are lovable, and that we can build bridges of mercy, maybe we could grow into real neighbors to one another.
13/Difference in the Neighborhood: Fred Rogers was ahead of his time on issues of difference and diversity. Francios Clemmons (African American) and Fred share a swimming pool (during Black protests in the nation). Fred Rogers did feminine tasks on the show (ironing, diapering a baby, washing dishes). He had handicapped guests on the show. His family employed African American domestic workers and he was friends with their children.
14/Puppets and Personality: What is essential is invisible to the eye (the little prince) Each one of the puppets were said to be a component of Mr. Rogers personality. King Friday represents authority. He was unusually and insistently self-focused. Lady Elaine Fairchilde represented Fred’s mischievous side. Daniel Striped Tiger Fred’s shyness, fear, and self-doubt. Some found his sincerity unnerving. Mister Rogers had a childlike quality. His daily disciplines and sense of God’s omnipresence meant that he was tapped into the deeper mystery of the world, and he took that sense into every human exchange. Many people commented on the intensity and focus of his presence. He embodied the sacred presence from the moment he woke up in the morning until the time he went to sleep at night.
15/Friends and neighbors: Fred made himself available to everyone and only a few people took him up on his offer of friendship. Fred has taken an interest in you; there is something out of this friendship that Fred wants to see happen. Fred had the talent of seeing human need. He saw that I needed something, and he was determined to provide it. And he did (Tim Madigan). All his friends agree that Fred made them feel special. Whatever moment he was in with another person that moment was sacred and all encompassing and the other person sensed that and internalized it (sacredness of the human transaction). Fred told Francois Clemmons that if you are gay it doesn’t matter to me at all. Whatever you say and do is fine with me but if you’re going to be on the show, as an important member of the Neighborhood, you can’t be ‘out’ as gay. People must not know. There were many people who suspected that Fred Rogers was gay. Fred said that if sexuality was measured on a scale he would be 5/10 because he found women and men attractive.
16/Fred’s Big Feelings: Fred gives a sermon at his church. Jesus grew through all the stages of becoming an adult human that each one of grows through. Jesus could and did have very strong feelings. I believe that Jesus gave us an eternal truth about the universality of feelings, Jesus was truthful about his feelings; Jesus wept. He got sad. Jesus got discouraged; he got scared; and he reveled in the things that pleased him. What if Jesus just sat? What if he had let his anger or his Sonship with God go unannounced? We would’ve known no Christ. And if Jesus hadn’t shown full humanness, then Jesus’s power to know and love people would have been limited too. Part of Fred’s truth was that he experienced significant anger, grief, and self-doubt in his life. He saw his own feelings and the feelings of others through the lens of the life of Jesus Christ, whose own emotional roominess made way for Fred’s personal growth.
17/All ground as holy ground: Fred and his friend heard the same sermon and she loved it and he did not. The Holy Spirit was able to translate the words of that feeble sermon to speak to the need of my friend. Even the space between television set and the receiver in need is Holy Ground. Daily prayer on set: Let some word that is heard be yours. Rogers is a pastor without a church, or better, one whose church has become the neighborhood. I will be having a hard time, and the phone will ring. For him such coincidences were the work of the Holy Spirit. He stopped in to see a pregnant, unmarried woman on her birthday (unknown to him). Unexpectedly stopped in to see Lisa right after her husband had died (he called the funeral home and he wept with her). Fred’s theology that has everything to do with those appearances that fell somewhere between mysterious and miraculous. For God’s foolishness is wiser than human wisdom, and God’s weakness is stronger than human strength. Each of us can be used in perfectly wonderful ways.
18/Heaven is a neighborhood: Fred got stomach cancer. He couldn’t allow many visitors, which made him sad; he worried that people would think he was being elitist and he didn’t want to hurt their feelings. When I think about heaven, it is a state I which we are so greatly loved that there is no fear and doubt and disillusionment and anxiety. IT is where people really do look at you with those eyes of Jesus. God loves you just the way you are. He asked his wife: do you think I am a sheep? Her reply: Fred, if ever there was a sheep, you’re one. I think that after we die we have this wide understanding of what’s real. And we’ll probably say, ah so that’s what it was all about.