Happy, Healthy Minds: A children's guide to emotional wellbeing

by The School of Life, Alain de Botton (Editor), Lizzy Stewart (Illustrator)

An essential guide to emotional wellbeing for children,   tackling everyday issues to facilitate happier, healthier lives.

Designed to help children become more aware of their emotional needs, Happy, Healthy Minds covers everything from parents and friends to school and overwhelming feelings of self-consciousness. With engaging, interactive prompts, it encourages children to open up, explore their own feelings, and face the dilemmas of growing up.

By mapping out emotions and moods children might have felt but not understood, this book provides them with the ultimate toolkit for happier, healthier, and more emotionally intelligent lives. And it speaks directly TO the child, in topics when parents don't seem to understand us; when school feels boring (or difficult); what to do when we're having trouble making friends; and much more.

Genres: Parenting, Childrens, Nonfiction, Health

176 pages, Hardcover

First published August 20, 2020

About the author

The School of Life is a global organisation helping people lead more fulfilled lives.

We believe that the journey to finding fulfilment begins with self-knowledge. It is only when we have a sense of who we really are that we can make reliable decisions, particularly around love and work.

Sadly, tools and techniques for developing self-knowledge and finding fulfilment are hard to find – they’re not taught in schools, in universities, or in workplaces. Too many of us go through life without ever really understanding what’s going on in the recesses of our minds.

That’s why we created The School of Life; a resource for helping us understand ourselves, for improving our relationships, our careers and our social lives - as well as for helping us find calm and get more out of our leisure hours. We do this through films, workshops, books and gifts - as well as through a warm and supportive community.

Reviews

[Sara Pourhassani · Rating 5 out of 5]

کیفیت مطالب از سلف‌هلپ‌هایی که برای بزرگسالان نوشته می‌شه بهتره.

[Jeanie · Rating 3 out of 5]

A resource for elementary age children to deal with emotions, relationships, confidence, parents, teachers, etc. All the things you may not learn in school but affect your well being. I think this resource would be better with a kid friendly version and this version for the parent. For a kid friendly version not to dumb it down but to not be so self-indulgent. The parent section actually was a little disturbing for me. It painted parents with a broad brush and did not deal with the authority of parents. In fact, authority was not dealt with at all and that leads to a turbulent relationship when authority is not established. Some home situations are not good and children need advocates for those situations. The goal was to understand parents but I felt that parents were undermined in this goal.

There is so much information packed into this book and I think with the help of teachers, parents, grandparents, and any of those with authority, this book would be helpful to workout those tough emotions that can lead to destruction and pain. The book was engaging as it gives tools to think about for example what job or future a child may be thinking about and how to determine what your passion may be. It also dealt with expectations of others and how unmet expectations lead to anger. There is a balance with this topic and each child, parent, and teacher is different however, it gives a starting place for a conversation and what to look for. Do I think kids will pick up this book on their own to read it, I don't know of any kid that would. However, if a parent is looking for different ways to communicate with their kids, this might be a good tool to get it started.

A special thank you to Myrick Marketing Media and Netgalley for the ARC and the opportunity to post an honest review.

[Sheldon · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this more for myself and the benefit of simple truths about life.

Two aspects of this book are quite fantastic. First, it is written from a very compassionate perspective, and I think it would help normalize a lot of experiences and feelings of children (and even adults). Second, it is premised on the theory that new ideas (see also: fresh perspectives) can help us deal with challenging/upsetting/disappointing aspects of life. On the latter point the book executes quite successfully.

Although I can't imagine any youngster reading this on their own (except perhaps one who is very motivated, introspective, and bookish), this is a book I could imagine a parent (or teacher) either using a resource for guiding discussions or reading to their child. Since it's arranged topically, I also don't think it makes complete sense to read it cover-to-cover, but rather on an as-needed basis as topics arise.

[SRH · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having enjoyed a number of The School of Life books, I was looking forward to reading this title and I found this book both thought provoking and helpful. My daughter and I read it together and it helped a start a number of interesting conversations. A book to turn to again and again and particularly useful at this unsettling time.

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

School of Life books are always impressively creative and engaging in content and design. This book did not fail to deliver!

The content as a whole was good. However, I felt much of the book explained situations but didn't address that the behavior is still not to be excused. For example, on bullying, at the beginning it said you should tell a grown-up if you are being bullied. But afterwards it went into all of the reasons why a bully might be the way they are. While this is good and expands our thinking (as the whole book did) I still wish they had emphasized a bit more that a bully should not be doing what they are doing, no matter their reasons. Oh! I would like to give a shout out to the chapter on anxiety. It was particularly helpful to me in this season and gave me LOTS of good reminders such as reminding yourself "Whatever happens, you will survive" and asking the questions "What's the worst that would happen if..."

Overall, I would put this in my classroom of upper elementary students or give to my friends who are parents of this age. While I can't say right at this moment I agree with everything said in here, I also don't vehemently disagree with its content. Many good conversations could come as a result of this book.

5 Stars= 100% recommend
3 Stars= 50% recommend
1 Star= Do not recommend

[Buffyanna · Rating 2 out of 5]

This reviewer is a mother and a doctor. I would characterize this as a children's mental health handbook, but one that is inconsistent in the tone of its delivery. It has mixed appeal for adults and children. First, I find it only partly successful in utilizing friendly cartoons and illustrations to increase its attractiveness to a younger audience. Without such, it would definitely be much too wordy and dry for any but the most motivated adolescent. As I began reading, I was puzzled by whether the vocabulary and phrases were aimed at the adult audience or children. [For example: Muscles wear away if we don't use them, which is why a lot of adults "spend their time running on peculiar machines with rubber mats that go nowhere."]

To aid me in unravelling my confusion over whether young readers would actually like this book, I recruited by own thirteen and sixteen year-olds as test subjects. I asked them what age group they thought would be most receptive to the preachings offered in this guide. They narrowed it down to ages 10-11 (Grade 6 level) by virtue of the expansion in vocabulary that is usually being encouraged at this age, the amount of "adults aren't cool" sarcasm being used, and the superficialness of the selected topics. The consensus of my young assistants was that the messages in each section are well-intentioned, but over generalized. They appreciated the fact that many of the perspectives are child-centred (instead of parent-centred) and therefore validating for a young reader's thoughts and insecurities. However, they noted (and I totally agree) that too many dumbed-down examples are used to explain the key points. Its leaves the overall impression of being repetitive and boring.

Thankfully, I do not think the authors intend this volume to be read cover-to-cover (good luck with that!) as the table of contents is arranged in a non-linear pictorial fashion, with sections showcased in bubbles. Key topics are: Parents, Screens, Bullies, How Old Am I?, School, Friends, Your Body, Separation, The Adult World, Nature, Patience, Confidence, Anxiety, Anger, Feeling Misunderstood. One of the reasons that I think some sections are over-generalized is because I can imagine some kids jumping to a certain topic and not finding the reassurances or guidance that they might to seeking. Some sections, despite the repetitive use of examples, left me wondering if the take home message would be sufficient. These are some of the examples of "take home" messages from these chapters, as I understood them: Parents - you can't choose your parents so learn to accept them, School - school is a fairly modern construct that doesn't teach you all the things you need to succeed in life, so don't sweat about not doing well in it, and Friends - learn to be the kind of friend you want others to be for yourself.

I hope some may benefit from this book. However, I wouldn't be recommending it myself, either personally or professionally.

[Parker (Paperback Parker) · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you to Myrick Marketing & Media for providing me with an E-ARC through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review!

"Happy, Healthy Minds" by The School of Life is a middle-grade non-fiction book all about maintaining a healthy mindset. It touches upon parental relationships, school, friendships, future careers, self-care, among other topics. This book also provides some worksheets for the reader to sort out their thoughts and ideas.

I believe "Happy, Healthy Minds" is a great resource for kids, and I would have truly benefitted from reading it when I was younger. Even now, at 21-years old, I learned a couple new strategies for approaching conflict, which was refreshing (but the book is definitely still aimed towards kids and I wouldn't generally recommend it to adults as a learning resource). A wide range of topics and scenarios are covered in this book, and I think it could really help a lot of kids process their emotions. I really loved the writing style of this! I also loved how it was broken up into different parts.

However, I did find that it wasn't very inclusive and that it generalized a lot of information, specifically in regards to family structures. I did appreciate that there were Queer parents included in some of the illustrations, but generally, I found that when the authors talked about families, it was quite exclusive. In every situation or scenario, there were always two parents, and there was always a mention of a mom and a dad. Of course this is the case for some kids, but there are some families with only one parent, or same-gender parents, or even more than two parents of any gender. Furthermore, the idea that a kid could perhaps not be living in a biological household but instead in a foster home or with adopted parents was completely ignored. As well, there was hardly any mention of the scenario of an abusive or unsafe living situation, and I think that in a book about mental health and mental wellbeing that should have been explored. Obviously there are countless family structures that kids can have and it would be impossible to include advice for every single one, but I think the authors could have done a better job by at least exploring the idea of more different families beyond the illustrations that are included.

Overall, I would definitely recommend for parents to share "Happy, Healthy Minds" with their kids, but then I would suggest having a discussion with them about the depiction of families in the book. Besides that, however, it is a great learning tool for kids and I'm happy it exists. 3/5 stars.

[Jamie Bee · Rating 1 out of 5]

Title and Title in Conflict; Not Well Done

I found this to be a peculiar book on several levels. First, it wasn't really clear what age range this book is meant for. Parts of it seem to be for those under the age of 10 while others seemed more geared toward tweens or teens. The book lacks focus and specificity. While the title states this is about happy, healthy minds, the subtitle states it’s about emotional well-being. I don't necessarily equate emotions with the mind—and certainly not solely with it. As I am an RN, when I read the first part of the book where it equated this book to talking about a healthy body, I thought it would address more the potential psychopathologies children could suffer than the more squishy and nebulous concept of emotions (yes, I hadn't read the subtitle closely!). Children of all ages, unfortunately, do suffer from real and very difficult mental issues, and I don't think this book adequately addresses them. In fact, sometimes I thought the author talked down to kids who could have real problems and who need real help and solutions (not the generalities or platitudes in this book). The author also glossed over the idea that families can be dysfunctional and that not all parents are good parents. Nearly a third of the book addresses parents, so this unrealistically rosy view is a real problem with this book; it could further marginalize at-risk children. I felt like the author made things too simple or general. Kids are pretty smart these days, and if they are picking up a book like this on their own, they're hoping for actual solutions to their problems. This book is simply poorly done, unfortunately. By the way, it does use British English, which is not a problem in and of itself if it is known beforehand, but American children may question the “strange” spellings (e.g., colour vs. color) and different word choices (e.g., mum vs. mom).

I received a free copy of this book, but that did not affect my review.

[Barbara · Rating 3 out of 5]

This useful book was a 3.5 for me. I appreciated the author's candor and the way readers were treated as though they are responsible for their decisions and attitudes. Although there might be some younger readers who could gain important life skills from its content, middle graders and maybe even some high schoolers and parents are most likely to benefit from its advice. There's even a rather long chapter devoted to parents and why they behave as they do. Although physical wellbeing is important, the book focuses on self-awareness by looking at emotions, friendship, bullies, age, growing up, leaving home, and even screen time, that topic that seems to cause problems in every family. The book contains several scenarios and questions to ponder. The book contains some illustrations that break up the text, but what is most appealing about it is how it offers the chance for self-examination and reflection and subsequent conversations between youngsters and the adults in their lives. Reading it will go a long way toward helping youngsters understand their parents' motivation as well as some of their own insecurities. Even at my advanced age, the book helped me feel a bit more competent, confident, and understanding. The author avoided being condescending and seemed to speak directly to readers. This book would be a good addition to a school or classroom library because it offers so much to discuss and then suggests tips for dealing with unpleasant or unfamiliar situations, something that everyone faces.

[Kate Henderson · Rating 1 out of 5]

I know this book isn't aimed at me specifically as a reader, but I am a school teacher so I am always on the look out for books that I can read and recommend for my students. This is not a book I will be recommending.
I found this book to be incredibly patronising, and very bizarre in some of its wordings and topics.
'what is a job?' 'mind problems' 'our parents are a big deal' why screens are so nice'
It was all very strange! I feel like it was written by someone who has never met a child/teenager in 2020 at all!!! It felt incredibly dated, and as I have mentioned previously incredibly patronising.
Also at times the book just went off on very strange tangents. Talking about animals, or artists - not relevant, and very random!

I like the idea that children would fill in the little 'thought boxes' that are spread throughout the book. I like the idea of it, however the execution again just doesn't sit well with me. 'what was the upsetting thing - what was the thorn' - again language that I just don't think is 'child-friendly'

I hate to write such negatively about a book, but I am so surprised that this book has been approved to go to print.

[Stephanie Tournas · Rating 4 out of 5]

For kids who turn to books to understand the meaning of life, this book is a gently reassuring guidebook. From understanding parents and bullies, to understanding one’s friendships, body and anxieties, the tone is affirming and inclusive. Things we may want to tell our kids, but are sure they will just roll their eyes, are delivered in a measured, reasonable tone, as “big ideas.” “Fears are not facts”, “Your parents are people too”, “You might make many mistakes before you get something right”: these are important messages that we hope our children come to understand, but sometimes we’re not the right people to say them. And the conversational and engaging tone of the book makes it easy to accept these truths. I especially liked the “big ideas” about one’s body: “Your body is not you … Your gender doesn’t say what you are supposed to be like.” And, about anxiety: “Whatever happens you will survive.” Even the illustrations are reassuring, depicting people of different skin tones and abilities, as well as many whose gender is unspecified.

[Miss Katherine M Symonds · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was sent a review copy of this book and my 7 year old daughter and I have been working through it together. It's been absolutely brilliant for starting conversations about quite difficult and painful subjects like feeling hurt, angry or jealous. It's given us a better vocabulary for having these conversations too.

One of the biggest realisations for her has been the facts that we, as parents, are people too so are fallible; that we fuss over them because we had to think of everything for them when they were tiny and are struggling to let go!

Other topics covered include screens (some great stone age references that explain why they are so addictive), bullies, friends and their relationship with their bodies ("your body is not you" being a helpful message for body haters).

I would really recommend this for kids 7+ - actually, the older the better as some of this is probably going over her head. And it will benefit from repeated rereading too - letting the wisdom sink deeper.

[shaunna · Rating 3 out of 5]

As someone who is constantly looking for books that I can add to my educator toolbox, I was really excited to flip through Happy, Health Minds. This book is amazing in theory, but the execution of it is somewhat problematic. I think that the book generalizes the life experience of a single child. Not all children have the same home life or emotional/mental structure, and although a lot of teachers or care providers teach many children at once, I feel that generalizing the experiences, especially the home life of children can be risky. I love the idea of this book so much, but the book assumes a lot. I think the author tried their best at creating a simple understanding of a lot of really complex ideas, but the result was not the best.

[Barbara Band · Rating 3 out of 5]

Deals with several topics around emotional wellbeing including parents, screens, bullies, school, feeling such as anger and anxiety, friends and confidence. Books published on this subject tend to be brightly illustrated with small chunks of text that make use of different fonts, fact boxes, bullet points, etc. This book has a totally different feel. It is quite text heavy with illustrations in muted colours and posed questions or ideas in round clouds rather than hard rectangles. Although aimed at 10 - 16 year olds, I'm not sure older teens would pick it up and I think it would be better used with younger children to start discussions around the concepts and themes covered in the book.

[Carrie · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this to our eight-year-old and there were sections that were good for prompting conversations. She also delighted in the part about parents being evil, but for a book published in 2020, I was surprised and disappointed by the heteronormative text. (The illustrator tried, with more diverse representation, but in a book, the words are important.) We had to keep stopping to talk about how not every family has a mom and dad, for instance. I wouldn’t recommend this book unless you’re keen for a lesson in critical reading.

[Victoria · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was sent a copy of this to review for a magazine and thought it was a great book. Not really understanding the negative reviews for this one! I’m a qualified teacher and home educator and think this book will be used a lot in our house.

I thought it was written in a friendly kind of tone and the style is such that it can be dipped in and out of. My children haven’t read this yet, but I’m confident that my nine year old will find it interesting, reassuring and supportive.

[Fadilla Dwianti Putri · Rating 4 out of 5]

I know this book is for children, but I, as an adult, benefited a lot while reading it. I think it is a great source for adults too to understand better ourselves and our problems--anger, disappointment, low confidence, etc--in the simplest way.

[Pardis Arjmandi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Get your 10-11 year old to read this! I wonder what would have been if I had read this as a child. So many good points about why adults act the way they do and why your friends and bullies act the way they do.
A child needs a guide like this

[Andréa]

Note: I accessed a digital review copy of this book through Edelweiss.

[roseate · Rating 4 out of 5]

quite enjoying the tidbits ’bout life written here. might more suitable for teens (?) but adult could inhale it also.

[em · Rating 1 out of 5]

I did not like this book. As a teacher and reader I had problems with this book. First off, I don’t think the term “mind problem” is productive. It implies that there are problems within our mind and I don’t think that’s the right term or association for children, it carries negative stigmas. More appropriate words could’ve been used. Next, I thought the book was extremely over generalized, for example in the “Parents” section the book stated that parents choose to be together. What about arranged marriage or a situation of abuse where a person faces repercussions for leaving (financial or otherwise). I wouldn’t recommend this book in any capacity.