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Not That I'd Kiss A Girl: A Kiwi girl's tale of coming out and coming of age
Lil O'Brien accidentally outed herself to her parents at the age of nineteen when they overheard her talking to a friend about liking girls. Half an hour later she found herself on the side of the road, with instructions to come back and pick up her suitcase the next day.
What follows is a heartbreaking yet hugely funny story of a young Kiwi girl - the deputy head girl from a posh private school - coming to grips with her sexuality in the face of stark disapproval from her parents.
Bit by bit, Lil finds the inner strength to pull herself into an entirely new world. Along the way she's called out for looking too straight in a gay bar, tries to break in to the lesbian in-crowd and figures out how to send her internet lover back to America. She falls in lust over a knotted soccer shoelace, explores how the hell to have sex with a girl and dates four women at once - unsuccessfully.
Lil's story is an insightful and honest look at how you figure out whether you're gay, bi or whatever - and deal with what comes next. It's an essential read for anyone who's had to fight for who they are and what they believe in.
What follows is a heartbreaking yet hugely funny story of a young Kiwi girl - the deputy head girl from a posh private school - coming to grips with her sexuality in the face of stark disapproval from her parents.
Bit by bit, Lil finds the inner strength to pull herself into an entirely new world. Along the way she's called out for looking too straight in a gay bar, tries to break in to the lesbian in-crowd and figures out how to send her internet lover back to America. She falls in lust over a knotted soccer shoelace, explores how the hell to have sex with a girl and dates four women at once - unsuccessfully.
Lil's story is an insightful and honest look at how you figure out whether you're gay, bi or whatever - and deal with what comes next. It's an essential read for anyone who's had to fight for who they are and what they believe in.
344 pages, Paperback
First published July 2, 2020
22 people are currently reading
1634 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 100 reviews
October 1, 2020
5 stars but I’d give it 10 stars if I could
Holiday reads are the best kind of reads and Not That I’d Kiss a Girl by Lil O’Brien is without a doubt one of the best books I’ve read in 2020, and is tied with When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi as my favourite non-fiction read of the year.
Lil is nineteen years old and has a pretty good life. She has lots of friends, a loving family and is studying at uni. Her parents, who adore her and love her unconditionally; are financially secure and she knows how lucky she is not to want for anything. Yet when her mum overhears her tell a friend “Imagine if on top of this they found out I was into girls”, a switch flicks in her mind and Lil is immediately kicked out of the house and not even allowed to pack her belongings.
What comes next is Lil’s story of navigating coming out to her parents years before she ever expected to; her mother’s refusal to talk to her; being forbid to tell anyone in the family that she is gay; working out if she really does want to be with girls; her dislike for the word lesbian; and her desire, but ongoing inability to lose her virginity at university as she determines just where her sexuality is at, which is all a bit confusing when straight woman want to fool around with her but ultimately stay with their men.
Wow! Not That I’d Kiss a Girl is a very special book, that will stay with you for a long time afterwards. It has all the feels and it is an absolute rollercoaster ride of emotions. It made me laugh and it made me cry. It had me sad, angry, happy, relieved, questioning and contemplative. It was honest, raw and eye opening. It was Lil’s no holds barred, warts and all, exceptionally well written must read story, but most of all; it was courageous.
Thank you @lilobrienwrites for sharing your story with us. I cannot begin to understand the severity of what you had to go through, but I’m quite sure that you’ve done a lot of people a favour and provided some comfort and hope by writing about it.
I cannot recommend Not That I’d Kiss a Girl enough. It’s a new release book that everyone should read and which really brings home the message ‘love is love.’
To play along with my book bingo and to see what else I’m reading, go to #ktbookbingo and @kt_elder on Instagram.
Holiday reads are the best kind of reads and Not That I’d Kiss a Girl by Lil O’Brien is without a doubt one of the best books I’ve read in 2020, and is tied with When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi as my favourite non-fiction read of the year.
Lil is nineteen years old and has a pretty good life. She has lots of friends, a loving family and is studying at uni. Her parents, who adore her and love her unconditionally; are financially secure and she knows how lucky she is not to want for anything. Yet when her mum overhears her tell a friend “Imagine if on top of this they found out I was into girls”, a switch flicks in her mind and Lil is immediately kicked out of the house and not even allowed to pack her belongings.
What comes next is Lil’s story of navigating coming out to her parents years before she ever expected to; her mother’s refusal to talk to her; being forbid to tell anyone in the family that she is gay; working out if she really does want to be with girls; her dislike for the word lesbian; and her desire, but ongoing inability to lose her virginity at university as she determines just where her sexuality is at, which is all a bit confusing when straight woman want to fool around with her but ultimately stay with their men.
Wow! Not That I’d Kiss a Girl is a very special book, that will stay with you for a long time afterwards. It has all the feels and it is an absolute rollercoaster ride of emotions. It made me laugh and it made me cry. It had me sad, angry, happy, relieved, questioning and contemplative. It was honest, raw and eye opening. It was Lil’s no holds barred, warts and all, exceptionally well written must read story, but most of all; it was courageous.
Thank you @lilobrienwrites for sharing your story with us. I cannot begin to understand the severity of what you had to go through, but I’m quite sure that you’ve done a lot of people a favour and provided some comfort and hope by writing about it.
I cannot recommend Not That I’d Kiss a Girl enough. It’s a new release book that everyone should read and which really brings home the message ‘love is love.’
To play along with my book bingo and to see what else I’m reading, go to #ktbookbingo and @kt_elder on Instagram.
May 19, 2021
“Here is where I think I’m supposed to say that I’ve forgiven them. But life’s not that simple and feelings certainly aren’t.”
a lot of this book will be stuck with me for a long time. i didn’t know what to expect when i first got into it but it’s really worth it.
on a lighter note i pray for her liver.
a lot of this book will be stuck with me for a long time. i didn’t know what to expect when i first got into it but it’s really worth it.
on a lighter note i pray for her liver.
Read
April 6, 2022im drawing the line here: 70% in i give up now i admit that nonfiction is NOT for me
February 16, 2022
lol this book was too CLOSE TO HOME.
February 21, 2021
Thank you Lil for writing this book. Insightful and well written. Your writing really draws us in as readers. Also I just want to give you a big Mum hug. ❤️
July 3, 2020
“I realised in the past nine months I’d been in a state of shock - one that came from being thrown out of the closet and all the things that followed. No-one should ever be ‘outed.’ I hadn’t considered that I’d been outed because I’d been is in control of my coming out process up to that night when the walls were too thin.”
Lil was nineteen when her parents overheard her on the phone to her best friend saying that she liked girls. Half an hour later she was outside on the pavement having been kicked out of the house and told by her Mum that she never wanted to see her again. What follows is Lil’s memoir about figuring out her sexuality and building a life outside of her family
Although it’s sad and poignant in places, Not That I’d Kiss a Girl is also very funny. Lil writes about her good, bad and indifferent relationships. She navigates online dating, sex toys, fashion and overenthusiastic lovers. Her strength, humour and honesty make Not That I’d Kiss a Girl a joy to read. What Lil’s book reenforced for me is the importance of LGBTQIA+ representation in TV, films and written media. Lil’s options in New Zealand in 2003 were limited. She only had tapes of The L-word, the kiss in Cruel Intentions and almost “theoretical” queer books in her University library at a time when she was desperately trying to find representations of her experience. Not That I’d Kiss a Girl adds beautifully to a New Zealand cannon of queer writing that needs to continue to grow and that I need to continue to explore
Huge thanks to the publisher for my ARC.
Lil was nineteen when her parents overheard her on the phone to her best friend saying that she liked girls. Half an hour later she was outside on the pavement having been kicked out of the house and told by her Mum that she never wanted to see her again. What follows is Lil’s memoir about figuring out her sexuality and building a life outside of her family
Although it’s sad and poignant in places, Not That I’d Kiss a Girl is also very funny. Lil writes about her good, bad and indifferent relationships. She navigates online dating, sex toys, fashion and overenthusiastic lovers. Her strength, humour and honesty make Not That I’d Kiss a Girl a joy to read. What Lil’s book reenforced for me is the importance of LGBTQIA+ representation in TV, films and written media. Lil’s options in New Zealand in 2003 were limited. She only had tapes of The L-word, the kiss in Cruel Intentions and almost “theoretical” queer books in her University library at a time when she was desperately trying to find representations of her experience. Not That I’d Kiss a Girl adds beautifully to a New Zealand cannon of queer writing that needs to continue to grow and that I need to continue to explore
Huge thanks to the publisher for my ARC.
August 5, 2020
This pretty cover grabbed me when I walked into my library and saw it on display. Being drawn to any sort of memoir I decided this was something different and would give it a go. Gosh, heartbreakingly sad in places, it really made me think about how hard life must be when your own family can't accept you as you are. Well written and interesting, I have to say that I enjoyed reading it and hope this book really helps those that are coming out.
July 5, 2020
Wasn't quite sure how to rate this so I went generous. Immensely readable and the coming out/coming into your sexuality side of this was funny, honest and wonderful to read through a New Zealand lens. I just kind of felt there was something missing.
January 18, 2021
Reading this book is like having a really good D&M chat with one of your articulate and entertaining mates while you get on the wines in the bathroom at a house party.
November 12, 2025
This was a five star from the moment I found out Lilly is a gay women from Ōtautahi. Her life mirrors my own in so many ways but also differs in such interesting ways too!! This kiwi memoir was the biggest push to start reading more from Aotearoa ❤️
August 20, 2020
Reaching the end of Lils memoirs my parenting self had a moment where the weight of realising the words and actions we have with/on our children will have a deeply impacting profound effect. I thought I already knew that but this story just amplified the realisation.
Lil knew from a young age that she liked girls, then as a teen accidentally outed herself to her parents, and the vitriol of confused reactions and emotions from her parents was devastating.
Lils has written a deeply passionate, raw view into her journey to sexual identity and it is MAGNIFICENT from the first page off dropping an "f-bomb" and till making me angry, happy and cry with all the emotions.
GO READ IT !!!!
Lil knew from a young age that she liked girls, then as a teen accidentally outed herself to her parents, and the vitriol of confused reactions and emotions from her parents was devastating.
Lils has written a deeply passionate, raw view into her journey to sexual identity and it is MAGNIFICENT from the first page off dropping an "f-bomb" and till making me angry, happy and cry with all the emotions.
GO READ IT !!!!
May 16, 2021
Was eerie recognising the Otago uni era described since I was so unhappy when I lived there and would later go on to kiss girls haha.
April 10, 2022
Homophobes fuel the rage within me like no other OOOO!!!
I'm not a memoir girlie but I really did enjoy this A LOT. Though, it was hard to read at some points. I could never imagine what it feels like to be so unaccepted by the people you love the most:(
Definitely shed a few tears whilst reading.
Very glad I decided to pick this up, especially as it's so out of my comfort zone.
Please go read this if you're looking for a raw, memorable non-fiction read!!
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・．.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・．
Some quotes I liked:
【 When you spend time with your bestest friends, it's like you're being lifted up and borne along a light breeze 】
【 It is a strange pressure to be across from a man who wants something that you don't want to give 】
【 Sometimes it's that you're not even speaking the same language because your heart and your body have a whole different vocabulary than girls who don't like other girls 】
【 Taking the piss out of other people transcends language barriers 】
【 Without followers, the tyrant has no power 】
【 But if I lost my little sister too, whatever was holding me together might have given way 】
【 I would give anything to be accepted by you again rather than just tolerated 】
I'm not a memoir girlie but I really did enjoy this A LOT. Though, it was hard to read at some points. I could never imagine what it feels like to be so unaccepted by the people you love the most:(
Definitely shed a few tears whilst reading.
Very glad I decided to pick this up, especially as it's so out of my comfort zone.
Please go read this if you're looking for a raw, memorable non-fiction read!!
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・．.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・．
Some quotes I liked:
【 When you spend time with your bestest friends, it's like you're being lifted up and borne along a light breeze 】
【 It is a strange pressure to be across from a man who wants something that you don't want to give 】
【 Sometimes it's that you're not even speaking the same language because your heart and your body have a whole different vocabulary than girls who don't like other girls 】
【 Taking the piss out of other people transcends language barriers 】
【 Without followers, the tyrant has no power 】
【 But if I lost my little sister too, whatever was holding me together might have given way 】
【 I would give anything to be accepted by you again rather than just tolerated 】
December 23, 2022
Where do I begin? Another memoir which I couldn't put down for too long. Following the journey of New Zealander Lil O'Brien and her journey of self acceptance and acceptance by those around her in such a heteronormative environment. Her story takes you through her high-school and Otago University days and later living in Auckland and all the while, she grapples with the heartbreaking relationship with her parents who disowned her because of her sexual orientation. This is a book for everyone, so insightful and brutally honest. Go pick it up at the library next time (or the e-book), it's worth it 💫.
November 26, 2022
meh. not spectacularly well written really. a memoir about a pretty awful experience without much in the way of wisdom or ~lessons learned~. not introspective enough maybe? sort of just; “here is what happened, it made me feel conflicting things and my life went on” the end.
it’s hard to write a negative review about a book like this but regardless of the deeply personal and devastating subject matter i just wasn’t impressed by the quality of the writing
it’s hard to write a negative review about a book like this but regardless of the deeply personal and devastating subject matter i just wasn’t impressed by the quality of the writing
Read
June 18, 2022cool cool cool cool this one hurt
August 11, 2020
Finished reading Lil O'Brien's memoir, NOT THAT I’D KISS A GIRL late last night. Another brave, page turning funny, honest memoir and a great read. It details O’Brien’s coming out and coming of age and the fall out that happens with her family. I was drawn to her empathy, warmth, humour and kindness when describing her life without varnishing her truth of what must have been traumatic. As a queer man my family coming out story was a positive one and more akin to Jess in the book, but my heart ached reading this book. There was a huge amount that resonated with me, coming out in the dialup age, Otago uni life, working in Auckland, and that hunger for queer content to name a few. I truly hope it finds the readers who need it.
December 29, 2023
just want to tell the author that i appreciate her honesty and vulnerability in this book. i related to the book a lot and it helped me reflect on my own experiences. thank you!!!
September 15, 2022
an absolutely charming, vulnerable and wonderful book!
you can tell that this author isn’t editing things to seem more glamorous, it’s painfully and beautifully real.
as a young lgbtqai+ teen from nz reading this i felt so seen (and a little bit called out, in the best way possible)
you can tell that this author isn’t editing things to seem more glamorous, it’s painfully and beautifully real.
as a young lgbtqai+ teen from nz reading this i felt so seen (and a little bit called out, in the best way possible)
August 25, 2022
This book was so good, a new favourite for sure. I loved Lil O’Briens writing style, honesty, and humour. Made for a more than pleasant read.
January 4, 2022
REVIEW: 5/5 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
_______________________
Freelance Copywriter Lil O'Brien (pseudonym) retells her late teenage years in Dunedin, and early twenties in Auckland as she comes to terms with - and comes out about - her sexuality as a lesbian. While most of her friends are supportive, even if they don't "get" it, her parents are the complete opposite and kick her out of the house.
_______________________
This enjoyable memoir is set in the early 2000's and snippets of nostalgia over finding out about my own sexuality in Dewey Decimal library books, having to line up for ten minutes free use of a computer, and finding just a slither of media representation took me for a ride. Not to mention that this story was set very close to where I live now; knowing I live near her parents and we have had shared memories of walking down the same streets elevated my buy-in.
Lil's experience about coming out will feel familiar to many. Some of her coming out she had power over, but many moments were not in her control, and were indescribably painful to read through. But for the pain, you'll find relatability and shared experiences wrapped somewhere within failed gaydar readings, wishing your heterosexual crush will make an exception for you, and Internet dating a girl who promises to fly across the world for you.
And you'll find relatability in homophobic family members and the secrets they wish to keep to save face, and even when you want to line up and give Lil's mother the piece of your mind she probably deserves, Lil will still speak with love for her.
Lil does leave the last chapter reflecting on her growth and what nearly a decade can do and I feel like it is a solid read with good morals and almost anybody, queer or not, will enjoy the relaxed Kiwi nature of her writing. Tino pai, Lil O'Brien! 🎉
_______________________
Freelance Copywriter Lil O'Brien (pseudonym) retells her late teenage years in Dunedin, and early twenties in Auckland as she comes to terms with - and comes out about - her sexuality as a lesbian. While most of her friends are supportive, even if they don't "get" it, her parents are the complete opposite and kick her out of the house.
_______________________
This enjoyable memoir is set in the early 2000's and snippets of nostalgia over finding out about my own sexuality in Dewey Decimal library books, having to line up for ten minutes free use of a computer, and finding just a slither of media representation took me for a ride. Not to mention that this story was set very close to where I live now; knowing I live near her parents and we have had shared memories of walking down the same streets elevated my buy-in.
Lil's experience about coming out will feel familiar to many. Some of her coming out she had power over, but many moments were not in her control, and were indescribably painful to read through. But for the pain, you'll find relatability and shared experiences wrapped somewhere within failed gaydar readings, wishing your heterosexual crush will make an exception for you, and Internet dating a girl who promises to fly across the world for you.
And you'll find relatability in homophobic family members and the secrets they wish to keep to save face, and even when you want to line up and give Lil's mother the piece of your mind she probably deserves, Lil will still speak with love for her.
Lil does leave the last chapter reflecting on her growth and what nearly a decade can do and I feel like it is a solid read with good morals and almost anybody, queer or not, will enjoy the relaxed Kiwi nature of her writing. Tino pai, Lil O'Brien! 🎉
July 26, 2022
This book is fun. It hurts at times but mostly it made me smile and occasionally exclaim or murmur, “lesbians!” affectionately. As a lesbian who had to leave home because of the lesbianing, it meant a lot to me to read it. I got a taste of Lil’s experience as a lesbian who came of age a bit earlier than I did, and the culture of alcoholism and partying that she discovered herself in. She is not only funny but at times straight up bitchy, and she conveys the bitchiness with the same “only since I’ve got ya here I guess we’ll elaborate a little on how I was feeling” WASPY tone. Can a kiwi be waspy? Does it work that way? Nonetheless, I had fun! I wanted to be her and I felt really really bad for her. Phenomenal. I would get a drink with her.
I wish there had been a chapter on Lil’s experience meeting and falling for the girlfriend she ends the book with. After following her through so many failed relationships and crushes, I wish we had gotten to a true love story. That kind of bummed me out as I realized I was in the home stretch and we had no time for a meet-cute.
I wish there had been a chapter on Lil’s experience meeting and falling for the girlfriend she ends the book with. After following her through so many failed relationships and crushes, I wish we had gotten to a true love story. That kind of bummed me out as I realized I was in the home stretch and we had no time for a meet-cute.
October 3, 2020
What a phenomenally honest book about sexuality, privilege and bigotry! That the bigotry came from Lil's own parents is all the more shocking. From her description I am pretty sure Lil grew up in the same suburb as me (though i am 12 years older) and went to the same private school some of my cousins did (many years earlier). But there the similarities end. When a couple of my male cousins (of about the same age as Lil) came out, my mostly conservative with-a-South-Island-farming background family didn't bat an eye. Even my elderly grandparents took it in their stride. So I find Lil's parents rejection of her when she is outed totally unfathomable and sad (for them and her) and not a reflection of South Island values, as described in the book. Oh and Lil's description of uni life at Otago make my drinking years at another university (a decade earlier) look almost teototal!!
January 4, 2021
This book is both beautiful and brilliant. I went to the same University and am impressed with the Authors grit. It was (and possibly still
Is) strongly heteronormative by proxy I think (increases the further south u go here). I spent my time fending off boys I was frustrated I didn’t “like like”, not realising flirting for the life of me and calmly explaining I just didn’t want to ruin “great friendships”. That and picking hopeless options as crushes as a diversion- clear reasons why now but never occurred to me why then - and I never met anyone to bump me out of my daze. I was a year or so ahead of the Author at the same hostel and she is spot on with her analyses. I’d never realised how hard it could be for some and it all the more inspires me in my work with diverse youth. It gets better. BUY AND READ THIS BOOK ❤️
Is) strongly heteronormative by proxy I think (increases the further south u go here). I spent my time fending off boys I was frustrated I didn’t “like like”, not realising flirting for the life of me and calmly explaining I just didn’t want to ruin “great friendships”. That and picking hopeless options as crushes as a diversion- clear reasons why now but never occurred to me why then - and I never met anyone to bump me out of my daze. I was a year or so ahead of the Author at the same hostel and she is spot on with her analyses. I’d never realised how hard it could be for some and it all the more inspires me in my work with diverse youth. It gets better. BUY AND READ THIS BOOK ❤️
October 6, 2020
Form: Physical
So usually I have a hard time rating memoirs as I feel like you can’t rate someone’s experience and I often struggle to enjoy a memoir the whole way through but boy oh boy was this one different! 🤗 I absolutely loved every minute of this reading experience and I absolutely devoured it! The humour and the way it was written was so entertaining and heartfelt that it felt like I could really hear the authors voice reading it out loud in my head 💕 It was at times heartbreaking and frustrating but then empowering and funny the next. Reading about Lil’s journey into adulthood as a queer woman really hit me hard and made me feel maybe just a little bit of what it’s like being a queer youth. I want (need) Lil to write more books because I just loved this one so much and I need more of her writing asap 💕 I am so proud to have this book on my shelves and it is so great to see some LGBTQ+ representation from a NZ perspective 🙌 I urge you to definitely check this book out whether you live here in NZ or overseas because I promise you, you will not be disappointed 💕
So usually I have a hard time rating memoirs as I feel like you can’t rate someone’s experience and I often struggle to enjoy a memoir the whole way through but boy oh boy was this one different! 🤗 I absolutely loved every minute of this reading experience and I absolutely devoured it! The humour and the way it was written was so entertaining and heartfelt that it felt like I could really hear the authors voice reading it out loud in my head 💕 It was at times heartbreaking and frustrating but then empowering and funny the next. Reading about Lil’s journey into adulthood as a queer woman really hit me hard and made me feel maybe just a little bit of what it’s like being a queer youth. I want (need) Lil to write more books because I just loved this one so much and I need more of her writing asap 💕 I am so proud to have this book on my shelves and it is so great to see some LGBTQ+ representation from a NZ perspective 🙌 I urge you to definitely check this book out whether you live here in NZ or overseas because I promise you, you will not be disappointed 💕
June 21, 2020
I was lucky enough to be given an advanced copy by the autor and all views are my honest opinion. This book was simply perfect. From page one I was hooked by the story and couldn’t put it down until I finished. The author delivers a beautiful and at times heartbreaking narrative with humor and realness that makes this coming of age story one to be remembered. I couldn’t recommend this beautiful novel more.
August 11, 2022
I’m just not a memoir kind of person. I think this book is so important and resembles many people’s individual experiences of exploration into their identity and their sexuality and some of the nuances of being outed/coming out - especially amidst an unsupportive parent and the strain that influences on the family dynamic.
A really great and important book, I’m just not particularly fond of the pacing and the writing style (at times)
A really great and important book, I’m just not particularly fond of the pacing and the writing style (at times)
August 18, 2020
Couldn’t stop reading this book until I finished it.
Not That I’d Kiss A Girl has two narratives. One is Lil’s journey from coming out and to acceptance. The other is Lil’s relationship with her parents, and her attempt to find some common ground with them, and the hurt they have caused her. So raw and real!
A brilliant read and worthy of anyone’s time 📚 11/10
Not That I’d Kiss A Girl has two narratives. One is Lil’s journey from coming out and to acceptance. The other is Lil’s relationship with her parents, and her attempt to find some common ground with them, and the hurt they have caused her. So raw and real!
A brilliant read and worthy of anyone’s time 📚 11/10
September 23, 2020
I read new Kiwi author Lil O’Brien’s memoir “Not That I’d Kiss A Girl” this week after a bit of well-placed peer pressure from NZ book friends, and it’s a spectacular, emotional and relatable book that every Kiwi should read.
I picked up immediately that Lil went to the same high school as me (ten years prior), grew up down in a neighbouring suburb, I knew the archetypes of people in the books and their attitudes, and I understood her years at Otago uni despite going to Vic as the university experience in each city is still pretty common. I could 100% see the exact world she was writing about, and other Kiwis without such immediate connections will still feel entirely at home reading this book. When places, bars, drinks, shops, phrases and slang and just overall culture are so unique to NZ, you know exactly what you’re working with. Understanding the memoir’s world made this book feel real in ways that others haven’t.
The book is funny, but also incredibly gut-wrenching. It’s a coming of age story tied in with the story of Lil coming out - being outed before she was ready and thrown out the house by her parents in the early 2000s and told her mother never wanted to see her again. The complex and distressing relationship with them is a really important read, especially for those of us whom homophobia hasn’t been relevant to. This book has the power of meaning different things to different people and these layers make it such an engaging read.
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/5...
I picked up immediately that Lil went to the same high school as me (ten years prior), grew up down in a neighbouring suburb, I knew the archetypes of people in the books and their attitudes, and I understood her years at Otago uni despite going to Vic as the university experience in each city is still pretty common. I could 100% see the exact world she was writing about, and other Kiwis without such immediate connections will still feel entirely at home reading this book. When places, bars, drinks, shops, phrases and slang and just overall culture are so unique to NZ, you know exactly what you’re working with. Understanding the memoir’s world made this book feel real in ways that others haven’t.
The book is funny, but also incredibly gut-wrenching. It’s a coming of age story tied in with the story of Lil coming out - being outed before she was ready and thrown out the house by her parents in the early 2000s and told her mother never wanted to see her again. The complex and distressing relationship with them is a really important read, especially for those of us whom homophobia hasn’t been relevant to. This book has the power of meaning different things to different people and these layers make it such an engaging read.
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/5...
November 10, 2020
Entertaining, endearing and no doubt validating for young queer readers. It’s also very brave, writing so openly and honestly about tricky issues like family, friendships and sex, without sugar-coating or just going for the funniest angle.
I’m not a Kiwi but especially enjoyed how New Zealand places and culture featured so heavily, though almost gasped at the various descriptions of what people were wearing in Dunedin, in winter, in the middle of the night - put a jacket on girl!
I’m not a Kiwi but especially enjoyed how New Zealand places and culture featured so heavily, though almost gasped at the various descriptions of what people were wearing in Dunedin, in winter, in the middle of the night - put a jacket on girl!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 100 reviews