Don't Believe the Swipe: Finding Love without Losing Yourself

by Mandy Hale

Don't let the swipe rule your life

Online dating. Dating apps. Texting. Social media. Endless swiping in search of forever love. It seems like the more ways technology offers to "connect" us, the less connected we actually are. Modern dating is not for the faint of heart!

Don't Believe the Swipe is not your mother's dating guide. It isn't about "landing a man" or learning to "think like a man" or "getting any man to fall in love with you"; it's about falling in love with yourself and then extending that love to every aspect of your life--including your love life. It's about learning to date without surrendering your power. It's about choosing yourself, regardless of whether someone swipes right or swipes left.

Funny, fresh, and relevant to today's crazy dating world, this book is sure to become your go-to modern dating guide. New York Times bestselling author Mandy Hale draws on her own hilarious and often jaw-dropping experiences to illustrate what it means to stop believing the swipe and start finding love without losing yourself.

There is a way to date with dignity, to refuse to let the swipe rule your life, to stand confident in your worth, and to not settle for less than you deserve. This book is that way.


"I am so happy to have this new book by Mandy Hale to help me think and laugh my way to finding the love of my life."-- Yvette Nicole Brown , actress, comedian, writer, and TV host

"Where has this book been all my life? It's seriously the last dating book I'll ever need."-- Krista Allen , actress, comedian, recovering believer in the swipe

"This book cuts through the fog of modern dating and reconnects us to our single most important relationship--the relationship we have with ourselves."-- Devyn Simone , celebrity matchmaker, dating expert, and TV host

Genres: Nonfiction, Relationships, Self Help, Personal Development, Memoir

224 pages, Paperback

Published April 20, 2021

About the author

Mandy Hale is affectionately known around the world as "The Single Woman.” In just over three years, Mandy has garnered a massive Twitter following of a half a million people from across the globe. With a heart to inspire single women to live their best lives and to never, ever settle, Mandy cuts to the heart of the matter with her inspirational, straight-talking, witty, and often wildly humorous take on life and love. She’s also not afraid to talk about the many realities of being single in a world that still asks “And WHY are you still single?”

Recently invited by Oprah to cover her “Lifeclass: the Tour” events in St. Louis and New York City as part of OWN’s “VIP Press Corps,” and featured at the Women of Faith conference in Hartford, Connecticut, Mandy has also been named a “Twitter Powerhouse” by the Huffington Post, a "Woman of Influence" by the Nashville Business Journal, and a “Single in the City” by Nashville Lifestyles magazine. She has also been featured in Forbes magazine, Cosmopolitan magazine, the Huffington Post, and is a featured guest blogger for Lifetime’s The Conversation. With followers from all over the world, Mandy has made a name for herself as the voice of empowerment and sassiness for single women across the globe.

Mandy released an e-book in February of 2012 that has gone on to garner rave reviews, and recently signed a two-book deal with Thomas Nelson Publishers. Her first published book, The Single Woman: Life, Love & a Dash of Sass hits shelves this summer.

Reviews

[Shannon Waters · Rating 4 out of 5]

God I love it when books confirm I should have high standards and not settle for less 🙌🏻

[Gina · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you're single and you still haven't read a Mandy Hale book, first off, someone from your tribe is missing, and it's Mandy. Befriend her. Secondly, I'm almost sure something is missing from your life without at least one of her books.

This book is like the ultimate dating handbook. I wish I had this book when I started dating. It would have been such a lantern on my path. She hit this one out of the park.

[Margaret · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very eye opening and honestly I would label this as a relationship book and not a dating book. Don't get me wrong, Mandy covers dating plenty, but a lot of things she said can be applied to any relationship you have. Highly recommend!

[Readwithraisa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good but bored meeee towards the end. Good though.

[Jenn · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have been following The Single Woman on Facebook and Instagram for a while now, and "Don't Believe the Swipe" is the first time I have purchased one of Mandy Hale's books. I am a mid-40'
s single woman who could relate to everything Mandy wrote about. I had been feeling so alone in my relationship (or lack of relationship) journey because I thought I was the only one feeling the way I did. Not true! I am so glad that I chose to buy this book and I urge others who may be struggling with feeling like they should settle or give in to take the time to read "Don't Believe the Swipe." The chapters are short and easy to read - so you will finish the book in no time at all. I highly recommend this book!

[ale · Rating 5 out of 5]

i cry :’)

[Syaimma · Rating 4 out of 5]

It’s just a light read. Loads of witty pop cultural references that are funny and fast paced. I thought it was going to be some thought provoking commentary essay on contemporary dating, but no, it’s mostly just about the author’s personal experiences, funny and sad history with men, personal intakes, opinions and so on. Nothing in this book was something I didn’t already know as a 23 years old reader.

But hey! It didn’t make me think too much, light, funny, witty, an easy read. And most importantly, entertaining and definitely a feel-good book. Recommended for sure.

[Zane Alksne · Rating 2 out of 5]

Maybe being in a relationship that started from a swipe is not the right time to read this book

223 pages

Maybe it was silly of me to read a book while I am in a relationship, which, figures started from a swipe, but in general I learned nothing new. I mechanically read through the book and didn't get any VAT for myself. Maybe some quotes that felt quite an on spot, but otherwise not a read for me. Or not the right time for such a read. Might be also the experience I went through with all the swipes myself and learned all the stuff on the go from real life, not from a book. Loved the easy-breezy style of writing and the witty jokes and celebrity bits we all know and remember. Otherwise not a book for me especially when I usually read fantasy and psychology is never my cup of tea.

[Angela · Rating 3 out of 5]

3/5: It is unfortunate that the overall tone of this book felt glib because there really is some truth in what Hale shares. I am not a fan of the "self help" genre in general, but having entered the wilderness of dating a year ago, I thought I might learn something or at least commiserate in my experience. I did both, so in that way this book was worth the read. I think the way Hale mixed in lingo made the topic feel too breezy and inconsequential when in reality it is of great consequence. Yes, the lingo is real and helpful to know but it felt almost gimmicky and took away from her sincere experience and wisdom.

[Sara Stacy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this book! By far the best Mandy Hale has written to date. As someone on the dating scene in my late 30s it is so easy to get lost in dating, especially losing oneself.

Mandy provides comic relief but also practical words of wisdom to her audience on not losing your identity in dating and singleness. Better yet she offers ways to celebrate it and also be on the lookout for the various men you might have encountered or will encounter in dating.

A must read for any woman in the dating world, or even thinking of getting into the modern dating scene.

[Jen · Rating 5 out of 5]

LOVE this book!!!! One of the best books I’ve read! Reading this book is like chatting with a girlfriend or a sister hearing the things you NEED to hear from someone who wants the best for you! This book has helped me to get past our terrible dating culture and live my life proudly with love and happiness as a single girl! A proud single girl! This book also helped me to change my dating experience by choosing to let go of the bad and look for the good! When you know your worth and show the world your values and worth, the world rises to meet you! 💗

[Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

Something about Mandy Hale just makes me want to read every book she's written. Although she's about 20 years older than I am...she is so relatable to me! I love the way Hale isn't afraid to bare it all, even the most embarrassing moments of her life, to make a point. As someone who has never dated and is thinking about getting into it, this book has given me more confidence...and helped me to remember to stand my ground. Only reason I gave the book 4 stars is because I feel like it began to get a bit repetitive...but good book overall.

[Tara Fleming · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have read all of Mandy's book and this is no different. They are all phenomenal. Even for someone younger than her, she keeps things real and authentic. That makes it so much easier to follow. I love how this book gave practical steps and lessons that will be easy to use in real life. I consider her a mentor but not really a mentor, because she has helped me through some of my darkest times in regards to relationships. I can't wait for her other books to come out!

[Erika Tapia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Me encantó 🥰 me confirmo que estoy en el camino correcto, que no pido mucho sino que soy mucho, que debes confiar en tu intuición y dejar de justificar/solapar comportamientos mediocres, quién quiera estar en tu vida lo va a demostrar, somos suficiente, cuando aprendemos a disfrutar la soltería es dificl dejar entrar a alguiem pues sabemos lo que implica compartir nuestra energía/tiempo con ellos.

[Dani Kimlinger · Rating 4 out of 5]

Don't Believe the Swipe is a funny, enlightening, and encouraging book that arrived at just the right time for me. Mandy's way of connecting with the reader is exceptional, making her personal experiences with modern dating relatable and inspiring. The book emphasizes the importance of self-worth before entering relationships, a message that resonated deeply with me. Mandy's honest and colorful descriptions of dating, combined with her advice on self-love, make this an ideal read for any single woman navigating the dating world. It is motivating, and empowering.

[Alexandra · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best books on modern dating and navigating all types of relationships. This handbook provides real life examples and tactical actionable advice on how to set boundaries as well as the raw truth of dating. It avoids the affirmative fluff and gets right down to the heart of self-worth, self actualization and living a full life of experience while not compromising your worth.

[Andrea Moncayo · Rating 4 out of 5]

I related to this book in so many ways. I appreciate the honesty and humor that Mandy shares in her writing. It was hard to put this book down, so I was able to finish it within a day. The only reason I didn’t give it 5 stars was because the writing style reminded me a lot more of texting writing, which I got distracted by at times. Overall, I enjoyed the context and overall lessons.

[Tara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow! Such a great guide to maintaining your sense of self while waiting for the right relationship. Mandy is honest (and sometimes it hurts), but she's got a gift of adding in the right amount of humor (and faith). I feel like I just had a great convo with my best friend. A must read for anyone planning to date or hurt by past relationships.

[Melissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thoroughly enjoyed this book that explores modern dating and single life. It is not a how-to book, but rather a way to overcome all the issues one may deal with in modern dating and still enjoy oneself and have a fulfilled life. I like the author's positive tone and the overall content of the book.

[Sarah Casada · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was an okay for me. There were some good concepts and ideas, but it was mostly nothing new and a, “don’t abandon your life for a man” said in a lot of ways. Also, there were a lot of syntactical and grammatical errors that made it a little annoying to read at times.

[Crystal Jackson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this whole book, but chapter 29 was the one I needed most. I would highly recommend this book to any single person who’s over online dating and wondering where the hell their true love is and when they plan to show up.

[Ashley Dobbin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wish I would’ve read this sooner in my healing journey, but it was a good reminder to keep choosing me, never settle, keep working on me, and not to measure my self worth through the eyes and actions of others.

[Janet Lebeda · Rating 4 out of 5]

Truths and good advice for anyone dating in this day and age, especially those who have been through a lot and may still be single or are nursing heartbreak. She provides relatable experience and solid advice.

[Lisa Arroyo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great insight into what dating is like these days, plus encouragement not to settle, which is so important. I'm glad I read this book, and would recommend it to any single or single again friends who might need some help navigating the territory.

[Shendy · Rating 5 out of 5]

if you want to have relationship & dating related book, i suggest you to buy this one and only book. oh i love it so muchhh!! it has everything you want to know about relationship & dating, you name it.. from A-Z✨️

[Andrew Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought this book was extremely well written.
It is the kind of book I would buy for some friends of mine.
Thanks again for offering me this book.

[Erin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m not sure if Mandy Hale wrote this book for me or about me, but she definitely hit the nail on the head once again ! More modern dating advice that we all need to hear!

[Melissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this one out of all her other books. So relatable to today's dating scene.

[Brenda Seefeldt · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this book because I think I wrote it. It's what I teach. So kudos, Mandy Hale, for being such a great writer with such a great message.

[Veronica · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not new information, but presented in a clear way that helps make one feel less crazy. Good, quick read.