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Becoming Who You Are: Insights on the True Self from Thomas Merton and Other Saints
By meditating on personal examples from the author's life, as well as reflecting on the inspirational life and writings of Thomas Merton, stories from the Gospels, as well as the lives of other holy men and women (among them, Henri Nouwen, Therese of Lisieux and Pope John XXIII) the reader will see how becoming who you are, and becoming the person that God created, is a simple path to happiness, peace of mind and even sanctity.
112 pages, Paperback
First published September 1, 2006
190 people are currently reading
1637 people want to read
About the author
James Martin
51 books1,020 followersJames Martin, SJ is a Jesuit priest, writer, editor at large of the Jesuit magazine America, and consultor to the Vatican's Secretariat for Communication.
Fr. Martin grew up in Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania, United States, and attended Plymouth-Whitemarsh High School. He graduated from the University of Pennsylvania's Wharton School of Business in 1982 and worked in corporate finance at General Electric for six years. Dissatisfied with the corporate world, he entered the Society of Jesus (more commonly known as the Jesuits) in 1988, and after completing his Jesuit training (which included studies in philosophy and theology, as well as full time-ministry) was ordained a priest in 1999. He received his Master's in Divinity (M.Div.) and Master's in Theology (Th.M.) from the Weston Jesuit School of Theology (now part of Boston College).
During his Jesuit training, Martin worked in a hospital for the seriously ill and a homeless shelter in Boston, with Mother Teresa's Missionaries of Charity in Jamaica, with street-gang members in Chicago, in a prison in Boston, and for two years with East African refugees in Nairobi, Kenya, with the Jesuit Refugee Service. In addition to his work at America magazine, Fr. Martin has written or edited more than 15 books, most of which are about spirituality and religion. He is a frequent commentator on religion and spirituality and has appeared on all the major networks, served as an expert commentator for ABC for the papal conclave that elected Pope Francis, and has written for many outlets, including the New York Times and The Wall Street Journal.
Father Martin's best known books The Jesuit Guide to (Almost) Everything (2010) and Jesus: A Pilgrimage were both New York Times bestsellers; My Life with the Saints was named a Publishers Weekly Best Book; and all three were winners of the Christopher Award.
He has received over 15 honorary degrees from Catholic colleges and universities, and in 2017 Pope Francis appointed him as consultor to the Vatican's Secretariat for Communication.
Fr. Martin grew up in Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania, United States, and attended Plymouth-Whitemarsh High School. He graduated from the University of Pennsylvania's Wharton School of Business in 1982 and worked in corporate finance at General Electric for six years. Dissatisfied with the corporate world, he entered the Society of Jesus (more commonly known as the Jesuits) in 1988, and after completing his Jesuit training (which included studies in philosophy and theology, as well as full time-ministry) was ordained a priest in 1999. He received his Master's in Divinity (M.Div.) and Master's in Theology (Th.M.) from the Weston Jesuit School of Theology (now part of Boston College).
During his Jesuit training, Martin worked in a hospital for the seriously ill and a homeless shelter in Boston, with Mother Teresa's Missionaries of Charity in Jamaica, with street-gang members in Chicago, in a prison in Boston, and for two years with East African refugees in Nairobi, Kenya, with the Jesuit Refugee Service. In addition to his work at America magazine, Fr. Martin has written or edited more than 15 books, most of which are about spirituality and religion. He is a frequent commentator on religion and spirituality and has appeared on all the major networks, served as an expert commentator for ABC for the papal conclave that elected Pope Francis, and has written for many outlets, including the New York Times and The Wall Street Journal.
Father Martin's best known books The Jesuit Guide to (Almost) Everything (2010) and Jesus: A Pilgrimage were both New York Times bestsellers; My Life with the Saints was named a Publishers Weekly Best Book; and all three were winners of the Christopher Award.
He has received over 15 honorary degrees from Catholic colleges and universities, and in 2017 Pope Francis appointed him as consultor to the Vatican's Secretariat for Communication.
Ratings & Reviews
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 150 reviews
October 9, 2012
Since I find both Merton and Nouwen helpful in my spiritual journey, I thought I would read this brief book by James Martin, S. J. to see how they impacted his spiritual journey. In addition to learning more about both men, I found the conversation about the false self and true self from Merton's perspective to be helpful for me. "The false self is the person that we present to the world, the one we think will be pleading to others: attractive, confident, successful. The true self ... Is the person that we are before God. Sanctity consists in discovering who that person is and striving to become that person." I would add "with God's help".
January 18, 2018
This isn't a particularly well-written book (i.e. no sources, no scholarly evidence whatsoever, repetitive). But James Martin states from the very beginning that this isn't an academic or scholarly essay, it's just a simple story; his own thoughts on living life and searching for one's true self.
Overall, it's a very brief conversation about being yourself and how that's really all God wants you to be. I thought it gave a refreshing insight on holiness and life as a Christian. I'd recommend this book to anyone in search of a simple reminder of God's love and acceptance.
Overall, it's a very brief conversation about being yourself and how that's really all God wants you to be. I thought it gave a refreshing insight on holiness and life as a Christian. I'd recommend this book to anyone in search of a simple reminder of God's love and acceptance.
July 27, 2018
Becoming Who You Are was a timely read for me. I’ve had this book for a few months and grabbed it yesterday as I packed for some time away in silence. I read it fairly slowly, one chapter at a time. Even so, I’m sure I could re-read it and learn even more.
Fr. Martin talks simply but profoundly about true self vs false self. I loved the metaphor that our false self is like we are wrapping bandages around things we want to be rather than showing our true self or who we really are.
This was a helpful read as I try to work through some circumstances in my life and my inner resistance to being who God made me to be. This book was a good reminder that every person has a different path to holiness but we are all called to be holy - to be that true self that God created when He made us.
Martin talks about the dangers of comparison and gives examples of how many Saints and saints have lived out their holiness in many different and even contradictory ways. I highly recommend this book as a way to think about who you are and what your particular path to holiness might be. Who might your true self be?
Fr. Martin talks simply but profoundly about true self vs false self. I loved the metaphor that our false self is like we are wrapping bandages around things we want to be rather than showing our true self or who we really are.
This was a helpful read as I try to work through some circumstances in my life and my inner resistance to being who God made me to be. This book was a good reminder that every person has a different path to holiness but we are all called to be holy - to be that true self that God created when He made us.
Martin talks about the dangers of comparison and gives examples of how many Saints and saints have lived out their holiness in many different and even contradictory ways. I highly recommend this book as a way to think about who you are and what your particular path to holiness might be. Who might your true self be?
August 5, 2018
I listened to the very short audio book of this and found it fascinating. As I'm getting ready to walk the Camino de Santiago, I wanted a bit of a spiritual book to read. This one got me interested in reading Thomas Merton's The Seven Storey Mountain. I love that the focus is on living every day life and becoming who you are through ordinary acts.
March 3, 2020
I'm never disappointed by anything James Martin writes. This book was no exception. Martin writes of discovering the true self, the self God created each person to be, with a down-to-earth style. Though he brings in many saints, he is careful to remind readers that saints, in their lifetimes, were as human and faulty as anyone else. He also states clearly that we are all called to be saints, but it is important to understand what a saint really is - not some pie in the sky ideal that most people can't achieve. All the saints sinned, had faults and struggles, not unlike any of us. They simply didn't give up and they knew enough to rely on and trust in God for forgiveness, guidance, strength, and whatever else they needed to keep pursuing a holy life.
Martin also dispels the myth that one has to do something spectacular to be holy. We may look at the saints for inspiration, but we are not called to be anyone but who we are. Only St. Theresa of Kolkata (Mother Theresa) was called to be St. Theresa of Kolkata. Only Saint Francis of Assisi was called to be Saint Francis of Assisi. In their wide variety, their wildly differing personalities, occupations, and interests, we learn that God puts in our hearts the desires that lead us to the life to which we are called, if we can but discern them correctly. It does not matter our age, our job, our background or anything else. We can all be holy right now in the place and situation we are in. The only requirement is to really want it and ask it of God.
I only wish this book were longer. It was over too quickly!
Martin also dispels the myth that one has to do something spectacular to be holy. We may look at the saints for inspiration, but we are not called to be anyone but who we are. Only St. Theresa of Kolkata (Mother Theresa) was called to be St. Theresa of Kolkata. Only Saint Francis of Assisi was called to be Saint Francis of Assisi. In their wide variety, their wildly differing personalities, occupations, and interests, we learn that God puts in our hearts the desires that lead us to the life to which we are called, if we can but discern them correctly. It does not matter our age, our job, our background or anything else. We can all be holy right now in the place and situation we are in. The only requirement is to really want it and ask it of God.
I only wish this book were longer. It was over too quickly!
June 26, 2016
Just returned from a Service Trip in Nicaragua & finished this book today. Here's what I wrote to my students & colleagues who were there.
I've so enjoyed looking at the photos of you all in Nicaragua-- holding, carrying, wheelbarrowing, playing with the children of the community.
I've spent some time upon my return from our trip considering my own experience in the community of El Jicarito, especially with my Dice Race-playing 10-year-old friend, Dixon.
How can I feel so attached to that lad, only after a few days/moments/hours in his company? What is the unlikely source of my optimistic yearning for his unknowable future?
In reading "Becoming Who You Are," by James Martin, SJ (one of the assigned Summer Reading books for rising sophomores), I came across this 1958 passage from Thomas Merton. In it, he describes his sense standing at a busy intersection in Louisville, Kentucky.
"...I was suddenly overwhelmed with the realization that I loved all those people, that they were mine and I theirs, that we could not be alien to one another even though we were total strangers. It was like awaking from a dream of separateness, of spurious self-isolation in a special world...."
While I'm still thinking and writing about the trip, this passage helped me realize that "they [are] mine and I theirs."
I've so enjoyed looking at the photos of you all in Nicaragua-- holding, carrying, wheelbarrowing, playing with the children of the community.
I've spent some time upon my return from our trip considering my own experience in the community of El Jicarito, especially with my Dice Race-playing 10-year-old friend, Dixon.
How can I feel so attached to that lad, only after a few days/moments/hours in his company? What is the unlikely source of my optimistic yearning for his unknowable future?
In reading "Becoming Who You Are," by James Martin, SJ (one of the assigned Summer Reading books for rising sophomores), I came across this 1958 passage from Thomas Merton. In it, he describes his sense standing at a busy intersection in Louisville, Kentucky.
"...I was suddenly overwhelmed with the realization that I loved all those people, that they were mine and I theirs, that we could not be alien to one another even though we were total strangers. It was like awaking from a dream of separateness, of spurious self-isolation in a special world...."
While I'm still thinking and writing about the trip, this passage helped me realize that "they [are] mine and I theirs."
September 2, 2015
This is a short book by Jesuit author, James Martin, which reflects on becoming the person God intended you to be. He refers to his own life, the life of Thomas Merton, Henri Nouwen and several saints to illustrate the diverse paths, obstacles, mis-steps and length of time sometimes needed to discover your "true self," who you are intended to be. I rated the book 3 stars. It seemed more like to a "refresher" to me, based on my previous reading of works by this author, Henri Nouwen and Thomas Merton.
February 26, 2021
As of this writing, I am currently in an in-between phase of my life. I’m answering the age-old questions of “Who am I?” and “Who am I meant to be?”. This book came at the perfect time and offered me refreshing insights that I know it will offer other readers. There are too many favorite parts to this book, but the biggest impact it has instilled in me is how beautiful and how necessary it is to accept yourself, completely. It’s a healing balm for someone who’s been taught from his upbringing to reject himself. It’s a lesson I am happy to learn at 26 (although I wish I learned it at 16). I'm giving this book five stars because it has opened me up to a level of inner freedom and peace that I didn't think I'd get to experience.
Essentially, Martin's book is a reflection on Thomas Merton’s idea of the true self – “to be saint means to be [yourself]”. Martin’s writing helps you gain insight in to your true self and its value not only in the spiritual life, but also in the mundane. Henri Nouwen, Thomas Merton, and Mother Theresa’s lives are featured here to flesh out a map/guide to expressing one’s true self. As great as they are, we are not meant to be them, but to be ourselves. . It’s a short book, but powerful. If you’re familiar with Fr. Martin’s other writings, there is some overlap – but these ideas are worth hearing again, particularly in this context.
Essentially, Martin's book is a reflection on Thomas Merton’s idea of the true self – “to be saint means to be [yourself]”. Martin’s writing helps you gain insight in to your true self and its value not only in the spiritual life, but also in the mundane. Henri Nouwen, Thomas Merton, and Mother Theresa’s lives are featured here to flesh out a map/guide to expressing one’s true self. As great as they are, we are not meant to be them, but to be ourselves. . It’s a short book, but powerful. If you’re familiar with Fr. Martin’s other writings, there is some overlap – but these ideas are worth hearing again, particularly in this context.
January 9, 2018
Inspiring stories from modern day saints. James Martin is easy to follow and down to earth.
December 7, 2019
Read at Bellarmine. Inspiring & comforting and written in direct casual style making it an easy read. We’re all called to be our own unique kind of holy...
July 31, 2017
Having already read Fr. Jim's "A Jesuit Off-Broadway: Behind the Scenes with Faith, Doubt, Forgiveness, and More", this book was a great next read. Fr. Martin's insights on the life and experiences of Thomas Merton and Henri Nouwen, in light of his own spiritual journey to discover his "true self" really helped reinforce what his prior books have taught me about how to distinguish my "true self" from my "false self". Having had no real background of Thomas Merton or Henri Nouwen, this book also provided an excellent primer to their thoughts, experiences, and writings, through Fr. Jim's eyes.
My only real issue with this book is that as he had finished it shortly after writing "A Jesuit Off-Broadway", some of the passages in "Becoming Who You Are" seemed to heavily borrow from his previous book, specifically the section on Christology. While I had no issue following along, having read "A Jesuit Off-Broadway" before, I found that he could have added more insight to that section, even though the point he makes about Jesus' self-awareness really fit into this book.
All in all, I would strongly recommend this book to someone who is trying to figure out what their "vocation" in life is or anyone who wishes to start anew and discover where it is that God, and a deeper relationship with Jesus, is calling them. Like Fr. Jim emphasizes, this doesn't need to lead to a religious calling, but it can be something that calls us to find the holiness within ourselves.
My only real issue with this book is that as he had finished it shortly after writing "A Jesuit Off-Broadway", some of the passages in "Becoming Who You Are" seemed to heavily borrow from his previous book, specifically the section on Christology. While I had no issue following along, having read "A Jesuit Off-Broadway" before, I found that he could have added more insight to that section, even though the point he makes about Jesus' self-awareness really fit into this book.
All in all, I would strongly recommend this book to someone who is trying to figure out what their "vocation" in life is or anyone who wishes to start anew and discover where it is that God, and a deeper relationship with Jesus, is calling them. Like Fr. Jim emphasizes, this doesn't need to lead to a religious calling, but it can be something that calls us to find the holiness within ourselves.
February 26, 2015
I can tell this book is going to take a while to sink in. Fr. Martin gives reflections from Thomas Merton and various saints to help us understand what it means to be holy, and how God calls each of us to our own kind of holiness. Probably only around 90 pages or so, this book is not difficult or long, and best taken in small bits to ponder. "The true self...is the person that we are before God. Sanctity consists in discovering who that person is and striving to become that person." While severely abstract at times, Fr. Martin breaks it down practically, as well, touching on how one figures it all out. I would recommend Fr. Martin's "The Jesuit Guide to Almost Everything" in addition to this, where Fr. Martin goes into great detail on listening in prayer and paying attention to God's interaction in our daily lives (how we discover our true selves). I don't find myself in exhaustion reading Fr. Martin's writing (some spiritual books get too smartypants-ish, some get too sappy, some don't relate to my walk of life in the least). He writes with a blend of intellect and emotion that helps me very much.
January 8, 2014
Excellent short book on discovering the true self. This is a life-long journey for most of us. One of the key points I got here is that we never ask ourselves who we want to be. We ask of ourselves and others what do we want to do but not who do want to BE. The doing should flow from the being and that river only flows one way. If you find yourself doing something that feels soul-sucking, it is likely because you missed the step when you asked yourself what you want to be and the two are not aligned. Makes perfect sense to me but maybe its a little unfair to say it's so obvious. Things seem clearer in the rear-view mirror than they do up ahead. And there's plenty in my rear-view mirror by this point in my life.
For you young people: ask yourself who you want to BE and not what you want to DO. And know that your desires for being are given to you by the creator and the closer you get to them, the closer you are to finding your true self and the peace that comes from fulfilling your vocation in this life.
For you young people: ask yourself who you want to BE and not what you want to DO. And know that your desires for being are given to you by the creator and the closer you get to them, the closer you are to finding your true self and the peace that comes from fulfilling your vocation in this life.
March 23, 2010
A quick read by Jesuit James Martin (his most recent book is A Jesuit Guide to Almost Everything)...it is a meditation based on Thomas Merton's idea of the true self that Martin originally wrote for a lecture at Corpus Christi Church in NY, 2005.
ix: "For me to be a saint means to be myself," wrote Thoms Merton in his book New Seeds of Contemplation. "Therefore the problem of sanctity and salvation is in fact the problem of finding out who I am and discovering my true self."
p.49: I don't think that you can be a true contemplative without being utterly honest before yourself and God.
p.75: The unity of the church, both then and now, encompasses diversity.
p.87: "...remember the sacramentality of everyday life...
Good Lenten reading.
ix: "For me to be a saint means to be myself," wrote Thoms Merton in his book New Seeds of Contemplation. "Therefore the problem of sanctity and salvation is in fact the problem of finding out who I am and discovering my true self."
p.49: I don't think that you can be a true contemplative without being utterly honest before yourself and God.
p.75: The unity of the church, both then and now, encompasses diversity.
p.87: "...remember the sacramentality of everyday life...
Good Lenten reading.
August 14, 2012
An amazing book, and very timely for me at the stage of life I am in. Uses the backdrops of the "saints" Thomas Merton, Henri Nouwen, Mother Teresa and others to show how they grew in their understanding of life and become who they were created to be, rather than someone else. The author encourages us to find who God created us to be, rather than try and emulate another's path to holiness. Recognizing that each of us are called to the path of holiness but how that happens is different for each of us. And in recognizing the path that God calls us to live in, we find what God has called us and uniquely gifted us to pursue.
February 16, 2014
This short meditation reminded me of why I love Merton and Nouwen so much, and why their words have stayed with me years after I first read them during my freshman year of college. Jim Martin is always a good read: easy, accessible, practical, and encouraging. I also appreciated his acknowledgement of the late Dan Harrington, SJ - one of my grad school professors, as well as Philip Seymour Hoffman, who he just called "Phil". A nice testament to them both.
January 16, 2019
Pithy statement to consider: Compare (oneself to others) and despair
Bernard loved the valleys,
Benedict the hills,
Francis the small towns
and Ignatius the great cities.
False self becoming the true self...
The multiplicity of desires leads to a multiplicity of paths to God.
...holy in a different way
Bernard loved the valleys,
Benedict the hills,
Francis the small towns
and Ignatius the great cities.
False self becoming the true self...
The multiplicity of desires leads to a multiplicity of paths to God.
...holy in a different way
November 11, 2015
I actually heard it on audio and it was fantastic.
Read
July 2, 2025Really simple message but well written. Thomas Merton was a Trappist monk who lived a long and winding life. Through it all, Merton decided to reject his “false self,” the part of ourselves that we want to present to the world. Merton spent time discovering his true self, the person that God wants us to be. Writing it out, it sounds very cliché, but Fr. Martin has a simple, authentic way of writing that I always really enjoy. Martin spent time talking about his own life and how he rejected his false self, the ambitious Wharton grad in the finance world.
Merton demanded that everyone truly become themselves, not forcing themselves to be another, even if that person is admirable. It’s a Catholic book, and Fr. Martin spends time talking about the life of Jesus and the diverse range of saints to get the point across; Aquinas spent his life surrounded by books, and Francis told his followers to not own anything. Short and simple read, but still really enjoyable and uplifting.
Quotes
“Each saint was placed in a different situation and time. Each had a different personality and dealt with life differently. And each related to God a little differently. Just think of the astonishing variety of saints. And I don’t mean simply when they lived, what they did, where they were from, or what languages they spoke. I mean something more basic: who they were and how they lived out their call to holiness.”
“So how do you determine if something is an essential part of your true self or simply an unfreedom that needs to be challenged? Good question. Basically, one has to ask, “Is this part of myself keeping me from being more loving and generous? Is this keeping me from being closer to God and to other people?” If the answer is yes, perhaps it may be time to consider how you could move away from whatever prevents you from being more loving and generous.”
“Our personalities are not eradicated as much as they are made fuller, more real, and finally more holy. In his collection of essays entitled Karl Rahner: Spiritual Writings, the esteemed Catholic theologian wrote, 'Christianity’s sense of the human relationship to God is not one that says that the more a person grows closer to God, the more that person’s existence vanishes into a puff of smoke.'"
Merton demanded that everyone truly become themselves, not forcing themselves to be another, even if that person is admirable. It’s a Catholic book, and Fr. Martin spends time talking about the life of Jesus and the diverse range of saints to get the point across; Aquinas spent his life surrounded by books, and Francis told his followers to not own anything. Short and simple read, but still really enjoyable and uplifting.
Quotes
“Each saint was placed in a different situation and time. Each had a different personality and dealt with life differently. And each related to God a little differently. Just think of the astonishing variety of saints. And I don’t mean simply when they lived, what they did, where they were from, or what languages they spoke. I mean something more basic: who they were and how they lived out their call to holiness.”
“So how do you determine if something is an essential part of your true self or simply an unfreedom that needs to be challenged? Good question. Basically, one has to ask, “Is this part of myself keeping me from being more loving and generous? Is this keeping me from being closer to God and to other people?” If the answer is yes, perhaps it may be time to consider how you could move away from whatever prevents you from being more loving and generous.”
“Our personalities are not eradicated as much as they are made fuller, more real, and finally more holy. In his collection of essays entitled Karl Rahner: Spiritual Writings, the esteemed Catholic theologian wrote, 'Christianity’s sense of the human relationship to God is not one that says that the more a person grows closer to God, the more that person’s existence vanishes into a puff of smoke.'"
November 10, 2018
Thomas Merton said that to be a saint means to be oneself and it is one's obligation to be a saint.
This whole book, 'Becoming Who You Are' by James Martin, SJ is supporting the Merton' statement and convinces us that it is true.
I like the book since it mainly deals with Thomas Merton and Henri Nouwen who are two of my most favorite spiritual writers along with C.S. Lewis. I read many of their books already and I am familiar with most of other saints' stories in this book as a Catholic and bookworm. It make me the book more enjoyable.
Martin mainly points out the weak points of those two famous spiritual writers rather than admirable virtues to persuade us that we can be as holy as those holy men and other saints. He quoted the phrases, 'Compare and despair' not to be someone else rather than ourselves. He shows us how we can be holy through our doing trifles in our daily lives.
What is new to me is Chapter Six, The Truest Self about Jesu Nazareth. Martin says Jesus might have grown into his true self very slowly. He says that Jesus might have been surprised by his first miracle at Cana. Martin also says when Jesus was obedient to accept God's will to death and 'perhaps even Jesus didn't know what his new life would be, until the morning of the first Easter, when his true self was finally revealed in all its splendor and glory. It's wonderful to think that even he was surprised at the new life given him by God.' It is a little difficult to agree with Martin; I believe this assumption is from his imagination or meditation rather than based on the studies of theologians.
There are seeds in "Becoming Who You Are," to develop Martin's later books, "My Life with Saints" and "Jesus: A Pilgrimage" which I enjoyed both.
This book is recommendable who wants to be closer to God.
This whole book, 'Becoming Who You Are' by James Martin, SJ is supporting the Merton' statement and convinces us that it is true.
I like the book since it mainly deals with Thomas Merton and Henri Nouwen who are two of my most favorite spiritual writers along with C.S. Lewis. I read many of their books already and I am familiar with most of other saints' stories in this book as a Catholic and bookworm. It make me the book more enjoyable.
Martin mainly points out the weak points of those two famous spiritual writers rather than admirable virtues to persuade us that we can be as holy as those holy men and other saints. He quoted the phrases, 'Compare and despair' not to be someone else rather than ourselves. He shows us how we can be holy through our doing trifles in our daily lives.
What is new to me is Chapter Six, The Truest Self about Jesu Nazareth. Martin says Jesus might have grown into his true self very slowly. He says that Jesus might have been surprised by his first miracle at Cana. Martin also says when Jesus was obedient to accept God's will to death and 'perhaps even Jesus didn't know what his new life would be, until the morning of the first Easter, when his true self was finally revealed in all its splendor and glory. It's wonderful to think that even he was surprised at the new life given him by God.' It is a little difficult to agree with Martin; I believe this assumption is from his imagination or meditation rather than based on the studies of theologians.
There are seeds in "Becoming Who You Are," to develop Martin's later books, "My Life with Saints" and "Jesus: A Pilgrimage" which I enjoyed both.
This book is recommendable who wants to be closer to God.
September 7, 2022
This book was a good weekend read. James Martin's thoughts are usually gently put and this book felt like a meditation on a particular and small aspect of Chritian gnosis, which took in the some of the sites of Thomas Merton's and Henri Nouwen's lives. Martin's own story of becoming a Jesuit priest feels a little underwhelming alongside the big narratives of Nouwen and Merton, but in some ways this serves quite a nice parrallel, allowing access to the two big literary figures through our own circumstances. The book's premise is fairly simple, but it's one of those simplicities, you only appreciate as simple, once it's been pointed out to you: the true self is the one that God sees, all else is what Martin calls 'the mask-self' and we are constantly struggling against the need to present this latter self. It's a point that anyone who doesn't have some level of faith might struggle with because it is rendered in overt Christian language. It is afterall written by a Jesuit priest. However, one could read the God-self as the alone-self, or the contemplative self, and often Martin does refer to contemplation as part of the process of discerning the true-self. It's an interesting idea in an age of social media, where the mask-self is constantly presenting and presented.
It would have been interesting to read more about Nouwen's closeted homosexuality but, as Martin states in the book, Nouwen himself wrote very little about it.
It would have been interesting to read more about Nouwen's closeted homosexuality but, as Martin states in the book, Nouwen himself wrote very little about it.
March 10, 2023
At times, one just blindly tries out a book. Sometimes you win, sometimes you don't win as much. I won pretty well with this one--a small treasure.
I very much enjoyed this book about discovering or developing your true self-identity: the identity which God wants for you; namely, your best self, your saint self. Fr. Martin draws mostly from the life and writings of Thomas Merton and, secondly, from those of Fr. Henri Nouwen (one of my favorite spiritual writers) and, lastly and to a lesser degree, Mother Teresa and various saints. He also has some fascinating sections about Christ's self-identity and, in particular, when exactly did Jesus know he was the Son of God.
The book presents various considerations about how to find one's true self and not be deceived by one's self-illusions, the lures of societal concepts of self-image, or external pressures to be someone who you are not.
This is a short book (98 pages), divided into seven chapters, each of which contains various subsections--perfect for daily reading and reflection. Fr. Martin intersperses interesting examples and short episodes from his own life and those of Merton, Nouwen and the saints to support his statements, which makes the reading all the more enjoyable. It's a book worth keeping and re-reading, or passing on to friends for their benefit.
I very much enjoyed this book about discovering or developing your true self-identity: the identity which God wants for you; namely, your best self, your saint self. Fr. Martin draws mostly from the life and writings of Thomas Merton and, secondly, from those of Fr. Henri Nouwen (one of my favorite spiritual writers) and, lastly and to a lesser degree, Mother Teresa and various saints. He also has some fascinating sections about Christ's self-identity and, in particular, when exactly did Jesus know he was the Son of God.
The book presents various considerations about how to find one's true self and not be deceived by one's self-illusions, the lures of societal concepts of self-image, or external pressures to be someone who you are not.
This is a short book (98 pages), divided into seven chapters, each of which contains various subsections--perfect for daily reading and reflection. Fr. Martin intersperses interesting examples and short episodes from his own life and those of Merton, Nouwen and the saints to support his statements, which makes the reading all the more enjoyable. It's a book worth keeping and re-reading, or passing on to friends for their benefit.
December 16, 2020
A thin book that delves into the lives of Thomas Merton, Henri Nouwen, and Jesus Christ: looking at the false self/true self dilemma. I found it freeing to consider the unique path God has given me as I move forward in holiness and becoming fully me.
"The false self is the person we present to the world, the one we think will be pleasing to others: attractive, confident, successful. The true self, on the other hand, is the person we are before God. Sanctity consists in discovering who that person is and striving to become that person."
"The problem comes when we begin to believe that we have to be someone else to be holy. We use someone else's map to heaven when God has already planted in our soul all the directions we need."
"The universal call to holiness is an invitation to be ourselves. It's also an invitation to remember the sacramentality of everyday life and to realize the great goal that God has set for us: sanctity."
"The invitation to holiness is a lifelong call to draw closer to God, who wants nothing more than to encounter us as the persons we are, our true selves, and as the saints we are meant to be."
"The false self is the person we present to the world, the one we think will be pleasing to others: attractive, confident, successful. The true self, on the other hand, is the person we are before God. Sanctity consists in discovering who that person is and striving to become that person."
"The problem comes when we begin to believe that we have to be someone else to be holy. We use someone else's map to heaven when God has already planted in our soul all the directions we need."
"The universal call to holiness is an invitation to be ourselves. It's also an invitation to remember the sacramentality of everyday life and to realize the great goal that God has set for us: sanctity."
"The invitation to holiness is a lifelong call to draw closer to God, who wants nothing more than to encounter us as the persons we are, our true selves, and as the saints we are meant to be."
June 14, 2020
This book is a short reflection on the concept of the true self, formulated by Thomas Merton and further popularized by Henri Nouwen. This concept suggests that the aim of spirituality is to reveal the person that God had made us to be, so the point of religion and spirituality is to help uncover that. He uses the lives and thought of Merton and Nouwen to discuss how this can be seen. It is a sensitive reading both of these two spiritual writers, but also Martin's own encounter with their writing.
As one might see in my list of finished book, I like James Martin, but I have to admit that a lot of this material is found in his other books as well. This is one of the difficulties of writing about how particular saints or writers have influenced one's writing. Since one's life history doesn't change, revisiting an author sometimes comes off as just the same thing all over again.
Nevertheless, this is a good set of reflections and genuinely worth reading for its review of this important spiritual concept.
As one might see in my list of finished book, I like James Martin, but I have to admit that a lot of this material is found in his other books as well. This is one of the difficulties of writing about how particular saints or writers have influenced one's writing. Since one's life history doesn't change, revisiting an author sometimes comes off as just the same thing all over again.
Nevertheless, this is a good set of reflections and genuinely worth reading for its review of this important spiritual concept.
January 24, 2019
I really enjoyed this book. I felt like I was having a cup of coffee with James Martin S.J. as he shared his insights.
I appreciated his references to other saints of old and from the modern day and the references to various peace and social justice giants. It was like hearing about old friends. Now I really want to revisit works by Richard Rohr. I have not read anything by Henri Nouwen, who Martin referenced a few times, so I will be sure to check him out!
I came away with questions to ponder:
- What is my brand of holiness, my path to sanctity?
- Who exactly is this person (me) who was created?
- What steps do I take to be more expansive and generous?
- What motivates my arrogance?
- How do I live out my vocation? (must identify what it is first)
- How soon will I shed false self? (must identify the parts first)
My favorite quotes:
"...bloom where you are planted".
" ...grow in holiness in the midst of... disappointments".
I appreciated his references to other saints of old and from the modern day and the references to various peace and social justice giants. It was like hearing about old friends. Now I really want to revisit works by Richard Rohr. I have not read anything by Henri Nouwen, who Martin referenced a few times, so I will be sure to check him out!
I came away with questions to ponder:
- What is my brand of holiness, my path to sanctity?
- Who exactly is this person (me) who was created?
- What steps do I take to be more expansive and generous?
- What motivates my arrogance?
- How do I live out my vocation? (must identify what it is first)
- How soon will I shed false self? (must identify the parts first)
My favorite quotes:
"...bloom where you are planted".
" ...grow in holiness in the midst of... disappointments".
October 3, 2022
As I continue to read books about/inspired by Merton from other authors, this small book initially let me down with its incredibly brief discussion of Merton before moving onto the points the author wants to make, although still Merton-inspired. James Martin, SJ, however, does a great job in the second half of the book tying together the beauty of the idea of the true self and it's power to break us free from the desire for power, security, and easy answers. The last two chapters, about Jesus' self-knowledge and other writers/saints, both stood out especially in my life now as I wrestle with the doubts of being an artist and a healthy differentiation from other artists in believing myself having something unique to give. We all have our own personal brand of holiness and sanctity, and much peace in life can be found in knowing that our path will not look like another's, nor should we desire it to or compare ourselves.
February 18, 2018
Similar to other reviewers, this is not written by an academic and really just scratches the surface of the concept of finding one’s own spiritualuty in one’s unique way, following loosely the examples of Merton and Nouwen. But Martin is clear on that point to start, so you go into the fairly short book knowing this. But from that intro, it takes you to an easier and clearer understanding that everyone in every life is unique by God’s design, and your path is yours by God’s design - unique from your neighbor’s. Martin does well in making it simple to understand and provides great references for deeper reading on how you can find your path in your life. Great read, and I highly recommend it, especially as an intro to anyone trying to find his/her way.
September 20, 2023
09/20/23:
I received this book during my Assumption Mission Associates Orientation at the beginning of this month. I would just like to say I had a wonderful and life changing experience at AMA Orientation with my fellow members Jeannette and Jillian who were just wonderful. This book although a quick read took me some time to work through. That’s because I was constantly pondering the questions and ideas posed by Reverend James Martin. This book is excellent for a self examination of faith and spiritual life. The idea of becoming who I was always meant to be has always been very interesting to me. This book examines sanctity, who God calls us to be, real life that we can all relate to, and the lives of Merton and Nouwen. Excellent read!
I received this book during my Assumption Mission Associates Orientation at the beginning of this month. I would just like to say I had a wonderful and life changing experience at AMA Orientation with my fellow members Jeannette and Jillian who were just wonderful. This book although a quick read took me some time to work through. That’s because I was constantly pondering the questions and ideas posed by Reverend James Martin. This book is excellent for a self examination of faith and spiritual life. The idea of becoming who I was always meant to be has always been very interesting to me. This book examines sanctity, who God calls us to be, real life that we can all relate to, and the lives of Merton and Nouwen. Excellent read!
June 26, 2018
Having read a fair amount of Merton and Nouwen, this book missed the mark for me. The author does apologize for not being a Merton scholar or an academic and offers this short book as a meditation on the true self. To fulfill that role, it would have been better to pose reflection questions based on his experiences instead of trying to capture the essence of the “true self.” Contrary to what is presented, I don’t think we have to work toward being our true self as Merton defined this concept, which is that this self is how we were created by God; thus, with interior work and awareness, our True Self will be seen.
January 25, 2019
I am an out-and-out fan of Fr James Martin, SJ. I've never read anything he's written without loving it and learning from it.
Becoming Who You Are is a short book that can become a long read. It did for me.
I did this book as Lectio Divina. I prayed it slowly and deeply. I think it would make a wonderful take-off point for any retreat and would make an excellent source for prayer group sharing. I think the thoughts and the words are much better shared than kept only for the reader alone. It's a book to share.
Thank you, Fr James Martin! ❤🙏🙏🙏❤
Becoming Who You Are is a short book that can become a long read. It did for me.
I did this book as Lectio Divina. I prayed it slowly and deeply. I think it would make a wonderful take-off point for any retreat and would make an excellent source for prayer group sharing. I think the thoughts and the words are much better shared than kept only for the reader alone. It's a book to share.
Thank you, Fr James Martin! ❤🙏🙏🙏❤
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