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Everything Is Fine
Grief, mental illness, and the bonds of family are movingly explored in this extraordinary memoir “suffused with emotional depth and intellectual inquiry” (Rachel Louise Snyder, author of No Visible Bruises ) as a writer delves into the tragedy of his mother’s violent death at the hands of his brother who struggled with schizophrenia. Perfect for fans of An Unquiet Mind and The Bright Hour .
Vince Granata remembers standing in front of his suburban home in Connecticut the day his mother and father returned from the hospital with his three new siblings in tow. He had just finished scrawling their names in red chalk on the driveway: Christopher, Timothy, and Elizabeth.
Twenty-three years later, Vince was a thousand miles away when he received the news that would change his life—Tim, propelled by unchecked schizophrenia, had killed their mother in their childhood home. Devastated by the grief of losing his mother, Vince is also consumed by an act so incomprehensible that it overshadows every happy memory of life growing up in his seemingly idyllic middle-class family.
“In candid, smoothly unspooling prose, Granata reconstructs life and memory from grief, writing a moving testament to the therapy of art, the power of record, and his immutable love for his family” ( Booklist ).
Vince Granata remembers standing in front of his suburban home in Connecticut the day his mother and father returned from the hospital with his three new siblings in tow. He had just finished scrawling their names in red chalk on the driveway: Christopher, Timothy, and Elizabeth.
Twenty-three years later, Vince was a thousand miles away when he received the news that would change his life—Tim, propelled by unchecked schizophrenia, had killed their mother in their childhood home. Devastated by the grief of losing his mother, Vince is also consumed by an act so incomprehensible that it overshadows every happy memory of life growing up in his seemingly idyllic middle-class family.
“In candid, smoothly unspooling prose, Granata reconstructs life and memory from grief, writing a moving testament to the therapy of art, the power of record, and his immutable love for his family” ( Booklist ).
304 pages, Hardcover
First published April 27, 2021
248 people are currently reading
14094 people want to read
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December 19, 2021
A tough read. The opening pages of this memoir were so shockingly disturbing. A horrific tragedy of a mom who violently dies by the hands of her mentally ill son.
Everything is fine is a delusion. It’s a cover up for the ugly, fearful truth. The truth that surrounds this family whose son, Tim, suffers from untreated schizophrenia. Not because the family hasn’t tried. But because the system failed them.
A harsh look at what mental illness can do to a person. A harsh look that strips the family down to what ifs that may have changed an outcome. A harsh look at how a family can become fragmented.
This is the reality of a system that is broken. Of doctors who can only do so much if a patient isn’t willing to help themselves.
Thank you for sharing your personal journey of grief and forgiveness, Vince. There are no words.
Given the last year and half with Covid, mental illness has been brought to the forefront. A positive move but still miles away of ensuring more timely treatments and support for not only those afflicted but also for their families. Mental illness affects us all.
It just varies on the spectrum on where it sits.
Everything is fine is a delusion. It’s a cover up for the ugly, fearful truth. The truth that surrounds this family whose son, Tim, suffers from untreated schizophrenia. Not because the family hasn’t tried. But because the system failed them.
A harsh look at what mental illness can do to a person. A harsh look that strips the family down to what ifs that may have changed an outcome. A harsh look at how a family can become fragmented.
This is the reality of a system that is broken. Of doctors who can only do so much if a patient isn’t willing to help themselves.
Thank you for sharing your personal journey of grief and forgiveness, Vince. There are no words.
Given the last year and half with Covid, mental illness has been brought to the forefront. A positive move but still miles away of ensuring more timely treatments and support for not only those afflicted but also for their families. Mental illness affects us all.
It just varies on the spectrum on where it sits.
April 23, 2021
I don’t know where to begin with this book other than the blurb, “In this extraordinarily moving memoir about grief, mental illness, and the bonds of family, a writer delves into the tragedy of his mother’s violent death at the hands of his brother who struggled with schizophrenia. Perfect for fans of An Unquiet Mind and The Bright Hour.”
Mental health deserves our spotlight and attention. We can’t ignore it any longer. We need to reduce the stigma, so real life stories where mental illness plays a big part are beyond critical. Vince Granata is a skilled writer, and this memoir is highly readable even though the topics are heartbreaking but important. Vince and his family never lose their love for their brother and son. The complex catwalk of that love and the path to understanding and redemption is an experience I can’t even begin to put into words.
Everything Is Fine is a book to be read and discussed. It's a portrayal about the power of forgiveness in the face of immeasurable loss, as well as a testament to grappling with the complexity of mental illness in those whom we love most.
I received a gifted copy.
Many of my reviews can also be found on my blog: www.jennifertarheelreader.com and instagram: www.instagram.com/tarheelreader
Mental health deserves our spotlight and attention. We can’t ignore it any longer. We need to reduce the stigma, so real life stories where mental illness plays a big part are beyond critical. Vince Granata is a skilled writer, and this memoir is highly readable even though the topics are heartbreaking but important. Vince and his family never lose their love for their brother and son. The complex catwalk of that love and the path to understanding and redemption is an experience I can’t even begin to put into words.
Everything Is Fine is a book to be read and discussed. It's a portrayal about the power of forgiveness in the face of immeasurable loss, as well as a testament to grappling with the complexity of mental illness in those whom we love most.
I received a gifted copy.
Many of my reviews can also be found on my blog: www.jennifertarheelreader.com and instagram: www.instagram.com/tarheelreader
August 20, 2021
Audiobook….narrated by Sean Patrick Hopkins
….8 hours and 37 minutes
A painful memoir impossible to forget. (hard to put down)—
I applaud the authors bravery.
Sad as can be. 🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁
Well written.
….8 hours and 37 minutes
A painful memoir impossible to forget. (hard to put down)—
I applaud the authors bravery.
Sad as can be. 🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁
Well written.
March 1, 2021
Vince Granata's memoir will leave you spellbound when you read it. "Everything is Fine" tells the poignant, painfully, seeringly honest story of what it's like to have a brother diagnosed with schizophrenia and who one day stabs their mother to death because of psychosis which convinced him of the truth of things not real.
Tim was one of a set of triplets who grew to be a champion high school wrestler with a truly normal childhood. But Tim lost his grip on reality during college years, convinced with paranoid delusions that demons were after him. The family did everything imaginable to support their increasingly irrational family member. Vince as the older brother relates the sense of guilt he retains as he details all the signs of madness and the fear of violence. Indeed, his guilt that he was gone out of the country at the critical moment unable to cope with Tim anymore.
Then, the memoir offers us glimpses of Tim's trial and the odd position Vince and the others felt with torn loyalties to mom or the brother who murdered her though not rational enough to be considered responsible. We learn how Vince continues to visit Tim and you hear the frustration at the system which failed to provide for those who suffer from psychosis.
It is near impossible to convey accurately what a powerful piece of writing this memoir is.
Tim was one of a set of triplets who grew to be a champion high school wrestler with a truly normal childhood. But Tim lost his grip on reality during college years, convinced with paranoid delusions that demons were after him. The family did everything imaginable to support their increasingly irrational family member. Vince as the older brother relates the sense of guilt he retains as he details all the signs of madness and the fear of violence. Indeed, his guilt that he was gone out of the country at the critical moment unable to cope with Tim anymore.
Then, the memoir offers us glimpses of Tim's trial and the odd position Vince and the others felt with torn loyalties to mom or the brother who murdered her though not rational enough to be considered responsible. We learn how Vince continues to visit Tim and you hear the frustration at the system which failed to provide for those who suffer from psychosis.
It is near impossible to convey accurately what a powerful piece of writing this memoir is.
January 6, 2022
5 painful memoir stars
Vince is the older brother to his triplet siblings – Christopher, Timothy, and Elizabeth. Vince’s memories are clear on the day they came home from the hospital and he shares anecdotes about growing up in Connecticut with them and his parents – both doctors.
The title of the memoir is a reference to something his mother frequently said but things are not fine in this family. Timothy has struggles with mental illness and they really escalate and he chooses to not take any medication as a young adult. He’s at Lehigh on a wrestling scholarship and nearly graduates. However, at home, things take a very dark turn and Timothy kills his mother and then turns himself in.
This memoir is the journey that Vince takes, researching Timothy’s illness – schizophrenia – and the path to reconciling his love (and forgiveness) for a sibling with the violence he committed. This quote was so powerful: “I love my brother—and—my brother killed our mother.”
Vince shares what it was like to go through Timothy’s trial and the impact on each family member. This was a very personal look into a family’s dark moments.
One fascinating part for me was reading about anosognosia, which is where someone is unaware of their illness, they don’t think anything is wrong with them. This was so well explained by the author that I feel I have a slightly better understanding of schizophrenia.
I don’t read a lot of memoirs, but the description for this one compelled me to read it as I want to learn more about mental illness and minimize the stigma. This memoir is well written, although very difficult to read at times. This is a book I won’t forget anytime soon and I think it would make an excellent book to discuss.
Thank you to Atria Books and NetGalley for the opportunity to read this one.
Vince is the older brother to his triplet siblings – Christopher, Timothy, and Elizabeth. Vince’s memories are clear on the day they came home from the hospital and he shares anecdotes about growing up in Connecticut with them and his parents – both doctors.
The title of the memoir is a reference to something his mother frequently said but things are not fine in this family. Timothy has struggles with mental illness and they really escalate and he chooses to not take any medication as a young adult. He’s at Lehigh on a wrestling scholarship and nearly graduates. However, at home, things take a very dark turn and Timothy kills his mother and then turns himself in.
This memoir is the journey that Vince takes, researching Timothy’s illness – schizophrenia – and the path to reconciling his love (and forgiveness) for a sibling with the violence he committed. This quote was so powerful: “I love my brother—and—my brother killed our mother.”
Vince shares what it was like to go through Timothy’s trial and the impact on each family member. This was a very personal look into a family’s dark moments.
One fascinating part for me was reading about anosognosia, which is where someone is unaware of their illness, they don’t think anything is wrong with them. This was so well explained by the author that I feel I have a slightly better understanding of schizophrenia.
I don’t read a lot of memoirs, but the description for this one compelled me to read it as I want to learn more about mental illness and minimize the stigma. This memoir is well written, although very difficult to read at times. This is a book I won’t forget anytime soon and I think it would make an excellent book to discuss.
Thank you to Atria Books and NetGalley for the opportunity to read this one.
January 10, 2021
Will stay with me forever. Thank you to the author who shared a personal tragedy with the rest of us. Hopefully the compassion and yet seriousness of mental illness is more understood
August 1, 2022
This memoir is heartbreakingly full of tragedy. A graveyard of grief and stars. At some point, I couldn’t continue reading. I needed a break to calm my heart.
It is about a schizophrenic brother who killed his innocent mother, and his oldest brother decided to look for the answers and to be brave for his younger siblings.
It is about a schizophrenic brother who killed his innocent mother, and his oldest brother decided to look for the answers and to be brave for his younger siblings.
May 12, 2021
This book was a suprising emotional tour back through my own life (and that of my brother's) as well as Granata's life. So many similarities. Though my family has not sustained such a loss, there is still the ongoing loss of a brother whose mental illness, quietly and loudly, shaped our family. All the 'what ifs' and regrets and grief around what we all lost, what we continue to lose. It's so painful to face all of it, but that's what Granata works to share - the transformative power of facing our pain and fears.
It was incredibly comforting too. Schizophrenia is an insidious thief. Granta brought anosognosia (an unawareness of one's own mental health condition or that they can’t perceive their condition accurately) to my attention, something I'd never heard of but definitely experienced in my brother. He is MIA somewhere in the world today and my heart breaks thinking of his isolation and loneliness and how we have failed him. Granata has written a gift of a book to anyone touched by schizophrenia and I'm so grateful to have read it and taken time to sit with my own grief alongside this book.
It was incredibly comforting too. Schizophrenia is an insidious thief. Granta brought anosognosia (an unawareness of one's own mental health condition or that they can’t perceive their condition accurately) to my attention, something I'd never heard of but definitely experienced in my brother. He is MIA somewhere in the world today and my heart breaks thinking of his isolation and loneliness and how we have failed him. Granata has written a gift of a book to anyone touched by schizophrenia and I'm so grateful to have read it and taken time to sit with my own grief alongside this book.
May 10, 2021
The book follows the author's family's story and explores how they were impacted by schizophrenia. Most of the book involves his younger brother Tim who became ill right after starting college, and how his illness progressed over several years. There were many challenges to getting Tim the care that he needed. Tragically, he began having hallucinations that involved their mother and killed her. The book reconstructs how the author's family arrived at that tragic day and then tracked how they survived and grieved in the aftermath.
Clearly, there's a traumatic, emotional story here, but the way the author tells it is very gripping and vivid. I felt like I was there, all the details of his home and everything he discovered through his research. It's incredible how he made his tragedy come alive on the page so that I shared in his pain. I love how the author talked about his male friends organizing and rallying together around him. I don't get many examples of amazing, deep male friendships, not the kind of friendships we see in women's stories. It was amazing to see how the author's friends showed up when he needed them.
To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at:
https://zibbyowens.com/transcript/vin...
Clearly, there's a traumatic, emotional story here, but the way the author tells it is very gripping and vivid. I felt like I was there, all the details of his home and everything he discovered through his research. It's incredible how he made his tragedy come alive on the page so that I shared in his pain. I love how the author talked about his male friends organizing and rallying together around him. I don't get many examples of amazing, deep male friendships, not the kind of friendships we see in women's stories. It was amazing to see how the author's friends showed up when he needed them.
To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at:
https://zibbyowens.com/transcript/vin...
February 1, 2021
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing this book in exchange for an honest review.
This book is heartbreaking, horrifying, and very important. Vince Granata tells his story well. His brother's descent into schizophrenia is fascinating and scary. Its importance is great in today's world of misunderstood mental illness.
This book is heartbreaking, horrifying, and very important. Vince Granata tells his story well. His brother's descent into schizophrenia is fascinating and scary. Its importance is great in today's world of misunderstood mental illness.
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July 9, 2021There are some things so unimaginable that they almost defy understanding. In this memoir, Vince Granata seeks to do just that; bring understanding to something unimaginable.
In 2014, his younger brother Tim killed their mother in a psychosis brought on by schizophrenia. Here, he tells the story of his family and their struggle to help Tim with his illness, Vince’s journey with his grief, and his path to come to terms with the tragedy.
Well written and gripping, this memoir is a moving account of Vince and his family and their struggle to overcome both Tim’s illness and their grief over the loss of their wife and mother at the hands of one of their own.
In 2014, his younger brother Tim killed their mother in a psychosis brought on by schizophrenia. Here, he tells the story of his family and their struggle to help Tim with his illness, Vince’s journey with his grief, and his path to come to terms with the tragedy.
Well written and gripping, this memoir is a moving account of Vince and his family and their struggle to overcome both Tim’s illness and their grief over the loss of their wife and mother at the hands of one of their own.
March 5, 2021
via my blog: https://bookstalkerblog.wordpress.com/
𝑰 𝒊𝒎𝒂𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒆 𝑻𝒊𝒎’𝒔 𝒑𝒔𝒚𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒔𝒊𝒔, 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒄𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒂𝒍 𝒎𝒂𝒅𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔 𝒎𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒊𝒂𝒏𝒐 𝒕𝒓𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒐𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒂𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒔𝒄𝒂𝒑𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒐𝒘𝒍𝒆𝒅 𝒊𝒏 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅.
Vince Granata’s mother was murdered at the hands of his mentally ill brother, this is a brutal fact, but what makes this memoir important for society and keeps it from sensationalizing his family’s tragedy, is the exploration of what brought them to this point. We read the headlines, horrified, make assumptions but most people never go much further than judgement. Claudia Granata was a victim of her son’s psychosis but that doesn’t tell the story of everything that became before and after. That doesn’t inform anyone that Tim, too, was a victim of his own psychosis. Such headlines seem to exist in a manner that erases the dedicated, loving mother who did everything she could to keep her son’s world safe. Yes, Claudia was a highly educated medical doctor, as is her surviving husband Attilio, but even with their means and education their son’s illness couldn’t be managed, and they did try. The day before her death, she spoke to a therapist who warned her to make her son feel safe and ‘be wary’. Their fear was that he would harm himself, as he had threatened to before when the noise in his head became too much to bear. Sadly, she couldn’t have imagined what was coming.
Vince writes about the signs they all neglected to see far earlier than his illness began presenting, and his shame at missed opportunities as a big brother and son. Just as any of us would rake over our own fears of guilt in the aftermath of tragedy, he attempts to pinpoint the pivotal moment when one step in the right direction could have changed the outcome. By sharing his brother Tim’s mental decline, it may well help other families going through similar struggles. The reality is, there is so much we do not understand about mental illness in all its forms, especially schizophrenia, which in Tim’s case went unchecked. What can be done when a patient refuses their meds, because they think they don’t need them, because that’s how the disease presents itself? You think you’re fine, better, cured. What is a person to do who lives each day with a distorted reality? We don’t think about how our perception, yes all of us, creates our world- it’s easier to draw a line from the ‘healthy’ and the ‘ill’ instead of thinking we could ever have any commonalities. All of us base our reality on what our inner voice tells us, what we see with our eyes and hear with our ears, we just happen to have the clear functioning, for the most part, of measuring ourselves against others, which keeps us grounded. How differently would we behave, think, feel if we had voices howling at us that someone has abused us, or were demons? How would we react during hallucinations others don’t see but are real for us? Even if it presents in less threatening ways, the fact remains the such illnesses push the patient further away from others, even distrusting our own devoted, worried mothers. Much of the time others push those coping with mental illness away to the fringes of our world, out of fear or ignorance of the condition. Is it really a shock that isolation feels like the only safe haven? It is often in self isolation that the disease grows stronger, overtaking what grasp on reality still remains. Loved ones best efforts sometimes aren’t enough, it’s truly being between a rock and a hard place if a patient is an adult. You cannot force treatment, and the illness can cause paranoia, distrust of even those who truly have nothing but your best interest at heart. Vince’s memoir is not intended as medical research but aside from the patient themselves, who better than those who have been witness to the slow creep of the disease to give testimony?
Granata knows that mental illness still has a stigma, and that we can’t move forward shaming people who carry the burden of the disease. Why are we kinder to people who have visible illnesses? Why don’t we, as a society, understand that mental illness, though complicated and not fully understood, is not any more shameful than any other disease? Even people with the best resources, medical education are lost at sea in trying to help their loved one learn how to treat and manage their mental illness. With memories and stories of Tim we see him not as the monster his horrific act (while suffering psychosis, we must keep in mind) makes him appear to be but as a beloved son and brother who had athletic gifts and promise of his own. I read this as a mother would, there was never a point Claudia gave up. How do you arrive at justice in such a case, when everyone loses? This is not the future she wanted for her son, nor can anyone imagine she would want to see him demonized for the horrors of that ill fated day. What about the healing, how does Vince’s family and yes, Tim included, move forward from here? How does Vince remember the beautiful woman his mother was without the savagery of her final moments poisoning the past? It’s a question he had to ask himself. He cannot honor his mother’s memory without shedding light on who his brother Tim really is when not in the grips of psychosis because he was her heart as much as Vince and his siblings. I don’t have enough words to describe how much this memoir touched me. I know I drone on in this review, but that’s how moving I found it to be, and very relatable. My own son was diagnosed with autism at a young age and anything that’s ‘different’ changes how people treat you, I saw this first hand, even when people try to fit in. It is a daily struggle for him more than any of us. I also understand the scope of a mother’s love, the reach of her heart, her fears and hopes and that she is willing to sacrifice anything to help her children. I think of how my own grandmother had to navigate her son’s schizophrenia, he never stayed on his meds for long past release from hospitalizations. It affected the entire makeup of the family, it could just as easily be a story that could have happened to them. Today there have been more advances, but not leaps. Family has front row seats to the constant fight, it is a helpless, heartbreaking feeling. Vince’s brother was a collegiate heavyweight wrestler, but his fiercest opponent has been his own mind. Vince’s story does not minimize the enormity of Tim’s act, but it’s not a simple case. This memoir is about family bonds, grief, the realities and struggles of mental health, and tragedy but most of all it about about love and forgiveness. I don’t believe the description of Claudia’s end will be what remains with me, but the vision of a loving mother playing the piano to calm the storm in her son’s mind. Yes read it!
Publication Date: April 27, 2021
Atria Books
𝑰 𝒊𝒎𝒂𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒆 𝑻𝒊𝒎’𝒔 𝒑𝒔𝒚𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒔𝒊𝒔, 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒄𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒂𝒍 𝒎𝒂𝒅𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔 𝒎𝒚 𝒎𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒂𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒊𝒂𝒏𝒐 𝒕𝒓𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒐𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒂𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒔𝒄𝒂𝒑𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒐𝒘𝒍𝒆𝒅 𝒊𝒏 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅.
Vince Granata’s mother was murdered at the hands of his mentally ill brother, this is a brutal fact, but what makes this memoir important for society and keeps it from sensationalizing his family’s tragedy, is the exploration of what brought them to this point. We read the headlines, horrified, make assumptions but most people never go much further than judgement. Claudia Granata was a victim of her son’s psychosis but that doesn’t tell the story of everything that became before and after. That doesn’t inform anyone that Tim, too, was a victim of his own psychosis. Such headlines seem to exist in a manner that erases the dedicated, loving mother who did everything she could to keep her son’s world safe. Yes, Claudia was a highly educated medical doctor, as is her surviving husband Attilio, but even with their means and education their son’s illness couldn’t be managed, and they did try. The day before her death, she spoke to a therapist who warned her to make her son feel safe and ‘be wary’. Their fear was that he would harm himself, as he had threatened to before when the noise in his head became too much to bear. Sadly, she couldn’t have imagined what was coming.
Vince writes about the signs they all neglected to see far earlier than his illness began presenting, and his shame at missed opportunities as a big brother and son. Just as any of us would rake over our own fears of guilt in the aftermath of tragedy, he attempts to pinpoint the pivotal moment when one step in the right direction could have changed the outcome. By sharing his brother Tim’s mental decline, it may well help other families going through similar struggles. The reality is, there is so much we do not understand about mental illness in all its forms, especially schizophrenia, which in Tim’s case went unchecked. What can be done when a patient refuses their meds, because they think they don’t need them, because that’s how the disease presents itself? You think you’re fine, better, cured. What is a person to do who lives each day with a distorted reality? We don’t think about how our perception, yes all of us, creates our world- it’s easier to draw a line from the ‘healthy’ and the ‘ill’ instead of thinking we could ever have any commonalities. All of us base our reality on what our inner voice tells us, what we see with our eyes and hear with our ears, we just happen to have the clear functioning, for the most part, of measuring ourselves against others, which keeps us grounded. How differently would we behave, think, feel if we had voices howling at us that someone has abused us, or were demons? How would we react during hallucinations others don’t see but are real for us? Even if it presents in less threatening ways, the fact remains the such illnesses push the patient further away from others, even distrusting our own devoted, worried mothers. Much of the time others push those coping with mental illness away to the fringes of our world, out of fear or ignorance of the condition. Is it really a shock that isolation feels like the only safe haven? It is often in self isolation that the disease grows stronger, overtaking what grasp on reality still remains. Loved ones best efforts sometimes aren’t enough, it’s truly being between a rock and a hard place if a patient is an adult. You cannot force treatment, and the illness can cause paranoia, distrust of even those who truly have nothing but your best interest at heart. Vince’s memoir is not intended as medical research but aside from the patient themselves, who better than those who have been witness to the slow creep of the disease to give testimony?
Granata knows that mental illness still has a stigma, and that we can’t move forward shaming people who carry the burden of the disease. Why are we kinder to people who have visible illnesses? Why don’t we, as a society, understand that mental illness, though complicated and not fully understood, is not any more shameful than any other disease? Even people with the best resources, medical education are lost at sea in trying to help their loved one learn how to treat and manage their mental illness. With memories and stories of Tim we see him not as the monster his horrific act (while suffering psychosis, we must keep in mind) makes him appear to be but as a beloved son and brother who had athletic gifts and promise of his own. I read this as a mother would, there was never a point Claudia gave up. How do you arrive at justice in such a case, when everyone loses? This is not the future she wanted for her son, nor can anyone imagine she would want to see him demonized for the horrors of that ill fated day. What about the healing, how does Vince’s family and yes, Tim included, move forward from here? How does Vince remember the beautiful woman his mother was without the savagery of her final moments poisoning the past? It’s a question he had to ask himself. He cannot honor his mother’s memory without shedding light on who his brother Tim really is when not in the grips of psychosis because he was her heart as much as Vince and his siblings. I don’t have enough words to describe how much this memoir touched me. I know I drone on in this review, but that’s how moving I found it to be, and very relatable. My own son was diagnosed with autism at a young age and anything that’s ‘different’ changes how people treat you, I saw this first hand, even when people try to fit in. It is a daily struggle for him more than any of us. I also understand the scope of a mother’s love, the reach of her heart, her fears and hopes and that she is willing to sacrifice anything to help her children. I think of how my own grandmother had to navigate her son’s schizophrenia, he never stayed on his meds for long past release from hospitalizations. It affected the entire makeup of the family, it could just as easily be a story that could have happened to them. Today there have been more advances, but not leaps. Family has front row seats to the constant fight, it is a helpless, heartbreaking feeling. Vince’s brother was a collegiate heavyweight wrestler, but his fiercest opponent has been his own mind. Vince’s story does not minimize the enormity of Tim’s act, but it’s not a simple case. This memoir is about family bonds, grief, the realities and struggles of mental health, and tragedy but most of all it about about love and forgiveness. I don’t believe the description of Claudia’s end will be what remains with me, but the vision of a loving mother playing the piano to calm the storm in her son’s mind. Yes read it!
Publication Date: April 27, 2021
Atria Books
March 14, 2023
Wow. This was a rough ride.
Vince Granata grew up in a seemingly normal family with triplets as his three younger siblings. When his brother Timothy began to show signs of having a severe mental illness in early adulthood, Granata and his family dealt with it as best as they could. Naturally, mistakes were made. None of them were experts on how to handle a family member with schizophrenia. They did their best, especially their mother who refused to give up on her son, but the mental illness had Tim in it's grip, causing paranoid delusions that would eventually cause him to kill his own mother, forever altering their family & individual lives.
This was absolutely devastating. It's literally unfathomable. This whole book reads like a punch in the gut. Most of us read something like this and can hardly even wrap our brains around the immensity of a pain like this, it's beyond understanding. How does someone move on from something like this? How does one carry on with their lives when you've had such a huge part of it violently ripped out?
It's gut wrenching to read about, knowing it was all real and someone had actually lived through this nightmare. It had my stomach roiling the entire time. But Granata somehow managed to come out on the other end with some clarity, and perspective. His insight into the way mental illness works, and the way the system doesn't work for the mentally ill was hard earned, and on point. Granata is a brilliant writer, he somehow manages to articulate the things that so many people cannot.
Granata's story will break your heart, but it's worth the read, especially if you have some mental illness in your own family that you are trying to understand. It's impossible to give this any less than 5 stars.
Vince Granata grew up in a seemingly normal family with triplets as his three younger siblings. When his brother Timothy began to show signs of having a severe mental illness in early adulthood, Granata and his family dealt with it as best as they could. Naturally, mistakes were made. None of them were experts on how to handle a family member with schizophrenia. They did their best, especially their mother who refused to give up on her son, but the mental illness had Tim in it's grip, causing paranoid delusions that would eventually cause him to kill his own mother, forever altering their family & individual lives.
This was absolutely devastating. It's literally unfathomable. This whole book reads like a punch in the gut. Most of us read something like this and can hardly even wrap our brains around the immensity of a pain like this, it's beyond understanding. How does someone move on from something like this? How does one carry on with their lives when you've had such a huge part of it violently ripped out?
It's gut wrenching to read about, knowing it was all real and someone had actually lived through this nightmare. It had my stomach roiling the entire time. But Granata somehow managed to come out on the other end with some clarity, and perspective. His insight into the way mental illness works, and the way the system doesn't work for the mentally ill was hard earned, and on point. Granata is a brilliant writer, he somehow manages to articulate the things that so many people cannot.
Granata's story will break your heart, but it's worth the read, especially if you have some mental illness in your own family that you are trying to understand. It's impossible to give this any less than 5 stars.
May 9, 2024
I was lucky to read this book in pieces as it trickled into the non-fiction classes at our shared MFA program. We all knew Vince had to write this story, and I’m so happy to see what a wonderfully deep and rich book it’s become.
April 26, 2021
I would rename this book "Everything is NOT Fine." I only read it because it was on a list of "current books you should be reading," which is usually an alarm for me to not be reading them, given my tastes; i.e. not of the general populace. It reminds me of a friend who's father killed his wife (my friend's mother) and then himself. Now, his son goes around on Facebook boasting of his father's past (work) and comments about "he's my hero," when the bald truth is that he killed his wife and then cowardly (some hero) killed himself. I keep silently saying, "Some day this is going to catch up with you and grind you to dust." I'm not a big fan of seeking help through phases of crises as they usually don't have anything to tell you that you don't know--if you have the courage to face it. Which my friend is not.
I wonder about this author. His schizophrenic brother murdered their mother, yet he lives, under lockdown. This is way too complicated to dissect in a simple book review. I've seen parents who will wear themselves down into a nub, dealing with adult children with mental illness. Somehow feeling responsible for this creature. The mother was warned she could be in danger. She went into denial saying he would never harm her. I guess he showed her.
His sister is a mess now, his father an aged shell. Yet he goes to visit his brother and keep that channel open, not wanting his brother to feel abandoned. I've seen "children" like this wipe family's out, not just through murder, but their psychosis, freewheeling spending, out of pocket medical expenses not covered, physical harm. I could tell twenty quick stories in this review, each a nightmare, and in the end? You have to make your choices. The author choses to remain in touch with his sibling, due to what? As he said, his mother would never see him married, never hold her grandchildren. In truth, he's been robbed, and do you stay in contact with the thief? I am sure many would agree with the author's humanitarian approach to all of this, but having seen it firsthand? Sometimes you need to cut your losses and close the door.
I wonder about this author. His schizophrenic brother murdered their mother, yet he lives, under lockdown. This is way too complicated to dissect in a simple book review. I've seen parents who will wear themselves down into a nub, dealing with adult children with mental illness. Somehow feeling responsible for this creature. The mother was warned she could be in danger. She went into denial saying he would never harm her. I guess he showed her.
His sister is a mess now, his father an aged shell. Yet he goes to visit his brother and keep that channel open, not wanting his brother to feel abandoned. I've seen "children" like this wipe family's out, not just through murder, but their psychosis, freewheeling spending, out of pocket medical expenses not covered, physical harm. I could tell twenty quick stories in this review, each a nightmare, and in the end? You have to make your choices. The author choses to remain in touch with his sibling, due to what? As he said, his mother would never see him married, never hold her grandchildren. In truth, he's been robbed, and do you stay in contact with the thief? I am sure many would agree with the author's humanitarian approach to all of this, but having seen it firsthand? Sometimes you need to cut your losses and close the door.
Read
May 12, 2025So heartbreaking but so important
May 7, 2021
“I love my brother—and—my brother killed our mother.”
The mind, man. What a fickle beast. It is simply fascinating. I knew within the first 3 pages of this book that it would be a five star read for me. I stand by that initial assessment.
And also, I am sufficiently creeped out. As I started this book I was wearing a Yale New Haven Hospital fleece, the hospital where his brother was treated. Vince and his family vacationed in the same area of the Cape that I did as a child and that my parents now reside in. I attended his prep schools rival. And despite this happening in my state, neither my husband nor I remember this tragedy. This one hits close.
“I saw his psychosis as a shroud covering his recent history, concealing the final months when his illness had festered untreated, his madness putrefying his brain.”
This book is raw and unfiltered and devastatingly honest. I devoured it and cannot recommend it highly enough. You would be hard pressed to find a single person out there who has not been touched by mental illness in some way. Although this story is an extreme case it is, unfortunately, not unheard of.
Thank you to Netgalley, Atria Books and the author for this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
The mind, man. What a fickle beast. It is simply fascinating. I knew within the first 3 pages of this book that it would be a five star read for me. I stand by that initial assessment.
And also, I am sufficiently creeped out. As I started this book I was wearing a Yale New Haven Hospital fleece, the hospital where his brother was treated. Vince and his family vacationed in the same area of the Cape that I did as a child and that my parents now reside in. I attended his prep schools rival. And despite this happening in my state, neither my husband nor I remember this tragedy. This one hits close.
“I saw his psychosis as a shroud covering his recent history, concealing the final months when his illness had festered untreated, his madness putrefying his brain.”
This book is raw and unfiltered and devastatingly honest. I devoured it and cannot recommend it highly enough. You would be hard pressed to find a single person out there who has not been touched by mental illness in some way. Although this story is an extreme case it is, unfortunately, not unheard of.
Thank you to Netgalley, Atria Books and the author for this ARC in exchange for an honest review.
February 3, 2021
Everything Is Fine by Vince Granata is a very engrossing, raw, real, and vulnerable personal memoir and telling of the author's own experiences that kept me reading well into late evening.
This is the author's own story of his life experiences involving the tragic death of his own mother by his younger brother whom was dealing with paranoid schizophrenia. The events that the author presents is so haunting, stunning, heartbreaking, and eye-opening that it must be told. The author's ability to bring all of these personal experiences into light is an important issue that is needed. Bringing forth more exposure to mental illness as a whole and how it not only affects the person, but their family and loved ones, is an issue that needs more attention and direction.
I am forever changed by reading the author's personal story and am glad that he was able to share it with us.
5/5 stars
Thank you NG and Atria Books for this arc and in return I am submitting my unbiased and voluntary review and opinion.
I am posting this review to my GR and Bookbub accounts immediately and will post it to my Amazon, Instagram, and B&N accounts upon publication.
This is the author's own story of his life experiences involving the tragic death of his own mother by his younger brother whom was dealing with paranoid schizophrenia. The events that the author presents is so haunting, stunning, heartbreaking, and eye-opening that it must be told. The author's ability to bring all of these personal experiences into light is an important issue that is needed. Bringing forth more exposure to mental illness as a whole and how it not only affects the person, but their family and loved ones, is an issue that needs more attention and direction.
I am forever changed by reading the author's personal story and am glad that he was able to share it with us.
5/5 stars
Thank you NG and Atria Books for this arc and in return I am submitting my unbiased and voluntary review and opinion.
I am posting this review to my GR and Bookbub accounts immediately and will post it to my Amazon, Instagram, and B&N accounts upon publication.
April 30, 2024
"Everything is Fine" was such a powerful and moving memoir that goes painstakingly through the tragedy of loss at the hands of a loved one, the strain that this put on the family, trying to go struggle through their grief together, all holding themselves up in differing ways.
This book takes us through some of the stages of grief and pain, as well as showing the author's willingness to see his brother as a human with a disease, rather than as a monster for what he did.
Vince bears his soul to us, gives us the highs and lows and also does a fabulous job of highlighting some of the ways people with serious mental illness are not being served. This opened my eyes to a perspective on schizophrenia and some of the pain that goes along with losing a family member before they're gone.
Wonderfully written and heartfelt. Definite tear-jerker, this was a wonderful read.
This book takes us through some of the stages of grief and pain, as well as showing the author's willingness to see his brother as a human with a disease, rather than as a monster for what he did.
Vince bears his soul to us, gives us the highs and lows and also does a fabulous job of highlighting some of the ways people with serious mental illness are not being served. This opened my eyes to a perspective on schizophrenia and some of the pain that goes along with losing a family member before they're gone.
Wonderfully written and heartfelt. Definite tear-jerker, this was a wonderful read.
July 8, 2021
This is a profoundly sad book. There is no happy ending for the Granata family. It is, however, a deeply touching narrative. Vince Granata does a super job of explaining just how difficult it is to have a family member with a basically untreatable mental illness. In his brother Tim’s case, it was only after an unthinkable act of violence that Tim was forced into what will probably be a lifetime of incarcerated treatment. Anyone who has ever had a family member with profound mental illness or intractable addictions will relate to the fear, the frustration, the sense of helplessness that the author describes. It was a satisfying book but it left me very sad.
May 2, 2021
In stunningly raw and vivid prose, Vince Granata examines the tragedy that ripped his family apart in his ironically titled memoir, EVERYTHING IS FINE. Writing about mental illness, grief and the systems that prevent real care for those who suffer, Granata covers the full spectrum of human emotion --- from anger to shame, forgiveness to hope, and everything in between.
Granata was four years old the day his mother and father came home with his three new siblings: Christopher, Timothy and Elizabeth. In an instant his family doubled in size, and he proudly and exuberantly took on the role of older brother. Twenty-three years later, Tim would violently kill their mother, the penultimate moment of his increasingly erratic and disturbing battle with schizophrenia, forever changing the fabric of the Granata family’s lives and forcing each of them to confront Tim’s mental illness. In the aftermath, Granata pieces together his family’s history from the day the triplets came home to the day his mother died on their family room floor, asking how such a joy-filled event --- the miraculous birth of three desperately wanted children --- could start the countdown to murder.
Granata is an expert curator of memories. Despite the horror that we know is coming for his family, he is able to relay warm, happy memories from his youth to introduce readers to Tim. With humor and heart, he talks about the way his father sheathed the family furniture in pink foam board when the triplets started to walk; the way his mother walked them around on a leash (their “tails”) so that they could experience the world together; and even the fights in which he and his siblings displayed their childhood might, protected by bouncy foam weapons. It is clear from the start that Granata always took his role as a big brother seriously. How could he not, with so many young charges looking up to him and following his lead? Even as a child, Granata often found himself aligned with his parents, while the triplets formed alliances among themselves, with Chris and Tim becoming the closest of brothers and best friends.
The Granatas, an upper middle-class family, had disposable income, access to good health care, food on the table, and plenty of extracurriculars to keep the children busy and well-rounded. So how could Tim’s mental illness have snuck its way into their lives?
As Granata tells it, Tim’s shift started in high school, an almost impossible time to make any real evaluations of a person’s mental health or grip on reality. Tim, a brick house of a boy, went from playing football to lifting weights to dominating his school’s wrestling team, a feat that earned him the respect of his peers, who adored him as a gentle giant. He spoke in funny accents in class, carried his injured brother off a football field and performed in jazz ensembles. But all the while, “Tim was accelerating. Somehow it started, on an atomic level, a single cell, something misfiring, an electron hitting the wrong synapse, a chemical imbalance slowly putrefying his brain.”
This fracturing of his psyche continued in college, first diagnosed as “severe depression” and later as psychosis NOS, “not otherwise specified.” Writing with the grit of a journalist, Granata quickly breaks down the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (the bible of psychology) definition of schizophrenia and psychosis, and how people suffering from single psychotic episodes and others descending rapidly into madness are grouped under the same umbrella, often in ways that put them in danger.
As Tim’s mental illness continues to take hold, first in suicidal ideation and later in an obsession with good and evil and the depravity that divides them, Granata highlights how his schizophrenia starts to work on separating him from the world. First, his illness adopts a malleable religious language, a “spiritual vocabulary that [animates] his delusions,” convincing him that others are corrupt, that he cannot connect with his peers. At first this helps Tim shape the world he struggles to recognize. But, as Granata comes to learn, it goes hand-in-hand with anosognosia, a form of denial that is neurologically programmed into the minds of the mentally ill that forces them to create and accept illogical explanations for the symptoms of their diseases.
Writing from a brother’s perspective, Granata painstakingly details how difficult this hardwired denial is to combat. Even more eloquently, he describes his --- and his family’s --- comprehension of the early symptoms of Tim’s illness as delusions themselves. Having never dealt with a mental illness as destructive and devastating as Tim’s, it is easy for Granata to feel angry at Tim’s denial, take too much stock in his brief moments of lucidity, or, even worse, poke holes in his careful understandings of the world his brain has created. Delusions beget delusions beget delusions, all as the medical community turned a blind eye to the powder keg that was building in the Granata home.
Writing about the day of his mother’s murder, Granata is clear-eyed, almost too graphic. He provides a detailed timeline and the thoughts that took hold of his brother, who by then believed that his parents had sexually abused him as a child. I won’t share the details of that day here, but what happens after is one of the most powerful, transformative bits of writing I have ever had the honor of reading. As Granata writes, “At first, I fought back, tried to separate my life into before and after, as though memories were photographs to sort into albums.” When he breaks through this linear way of thinking and focuses instead on the complex and layered emotions that drive memory, the book takes on a somehow even more shocking and earth-shattering tension as he moves toward honoring his mother, forgiving his brother and finding himself in the process.
EVERYTHING IS FINE is an immediately gripping book, not least for its ripped-from-the-headlines topic. But this is no shock-value memoir by someone looking to trauma dump their story into the lives of others with no follow-up. Granata is an eerily prescient writer who is able to look at the big picture of even the smallest, most tender and intimate moments. What is so impressive about this book is not the shock and horror of what happened to Tim or what he did to his mother, but the ways that Granata is able to weave a tapestry of loss --- Tim’s loss of his control, his mother’s loss of life, Chris’ loss of his best friend and womb-mate --- into something that perfectly demonstrates the ways that we have failed our mentally ill neighbors and the families who love them. Through his salvaging of the Tim he grew up with (which is not easy, not taken or given lightly), Granata is able to explore decades of reform in mental illness care, the changing bonds of familial love, and, of course, the binds of grief and anger.
Haunting, poignant and eye-opening, EVERYTHING IS FINE is a testament not only to a brother’s love, but to a family’s ability to heal. Vince Granata is a cadenced, courageous writer you won’t soon forget.
Reviewed by Rebecca Munro
Granata was four years old the day his mother and father came home with his three new siblings: Christopher, Timothy and Elizabeth. In an instant his family doubled in size, and he proudly and exuberantly took on the role of older brother. Twenty-three years later, Tim would violently kill their mother, the penultimate moment of his increasingly erratic and disturbing battle with schizophrenia, forever changing the fabric of the Granata family’s lives and forcing each of them to confront Tim’s mental illness. In the aftermath, Granata pieces together his family’s history from the day the triplets came home to the day his mother died on their family room floor, asking how such a joy-filled event --- the miraculous birth of three desperately wanted children --- could start the countdown to murder.
Granata is an expert curator of memories. Despite the horror that we know is coming for his family, he is able to relay warm, happy memories from his youth to introduce readers to Tim. With humor and heart, he talks about the way his father sheathed the family furniture in pink foam board when the triplets started to walk; the way his mother walked them around on a leash (their “tails”) so that they could experience the world together; and even the fights in which he and his siblings displayed their childhood might, protected by bouncy foam weapons. It is clear from the start that Granata always took his role as a big brother seriously. How could he not, with so many young charges looking up to him and following his lead? Even as a child, Granata often found himself aligned with his parents, while the triplets formed alliances among themselves, with Chris and Tim becoming the closest of brothers and best friends.
The Granatas, an upper middle-class family, had disposable income, access to good health care, food on the table, and plenty of extracurriculars to keep the children busy and well-rounded. So how could Tim’s mental illness have snuck its way into their lives?
As Granata tells it, Tim’s shift started in high school, an almost impossible time to make any real evaluations of a person’s mental health or grip on reality. Tim, a brick house of a boy, went from playing football to lifting weights to dominating his school’s wrestling team, a feat that earned him the respect of his peers, who adored him as a gentle giant. He spoke in funny accents in class, carried his injured brother off a football field and performed in jazz ensembles. But all the while, “Tim was accelerating. Somehow it started, on an atomic level, a single cell, something misfiring, an electron hitting the wrong synapse, a chemical imbalance slowly putrefying his brain.”
This fracturing of his psyche continued in college, first diagnosed as “severe depression” and later as psychosis NOS, “not otherwise specified.” Writing with the grit of a journalist, Granata quickly breaks down the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (the bible of psychology) definition of schizophrenia and psychosis, and how people suffering from single psychotic episodes and others descending rapidly into madness are grouped under the same umbrella, often in ways that put them in danger.
As Tim’s mental illness continues to take hold, first in suicidal ideation and later in an obsession with good and evil and the depravity that divides them, Granata highlights how his schizophrenia starts to work on separating him from the world. First, his illness adopts a malleable religious language, a “spiritual vocabulary that [animates] his delusions,” convincing him that others are corrupt, that he cannot connect with his peers. At first this helps Tim shape the world he struggles to recognize. But, as Granata comes to learn, it goes hand-in-hand with anosognosia, a form of denial that is neurologically programmed into the minds of the mentally ill that forces them to create and accept illogical explanations for the symptoms of their diseases.
Writing from a brother’s perspective, Granata painstakingly details how difficult this hardwired denial is to combat. Even more eloquently, he describes his --- and his family’s --- comprehension of the early symptoms of Tim’s illness as delusions themselves. Having never dealt with a mental illness as destructive and devastating as Tim’s, it is easy for Granata to feel angry at Tim’s denial, take too much stock in his brief moments of lucidity, or, even worse, poke holes in his careful understandings of the world his brain has created. Delusions beget delusions beget delusions, all as the medical community turned a blind eye to the powder keg that was building in the Granata home.
Writing about the day of his mother’s murder, Granata is clear-eyed, almost too graphic. He provides a detailed timeline and the thoughts that took hold of his brother, who by then believed that his parents had sexually abused him as a child. I won’t share the details of that day here, but what happens after is one of the most powerful, transformative bits of writing I have ever had the honor of reading. As Granata writes, “At first, I fought back, tried to separate my life into before and after, as though memories were photographs to sort into albums.” When he breaks through this linear way of thinking and focuses instead on the complex and layered emotions that drive memory, the book takes on a somehow even more shocking and earth-shattering tension as he moves toward honoring his mother, forgiving his brother and finding himself in the process.
EVERYTHING IS FINE is an immediately gripping book, not least for its ripped-from-the-headlines topic. But this is no shock-value memoir by someone looking to trauma dump their story into the lives of others with no follow-up. Granata is an eerily prescient writer who is able to look at the big picture of even the smallest, most tender and intimate moments. What is so impressive about this book is not the shock and horror of what happened to Tim or what he did to his mother, but the ways that Granata is able to weave a tapestry of loss --- Tim’s loss of his control, his mother’s loss of life, Chris’ loss of his best friend and womb-mate --- into something that perfectly demonstrates the ways that we have failed our mentally ill neighbors and the families who love them. Through his salvaging of the Tim he grew up with (which is not easy, not taken or given lightly), Granata is able to explore decades of reform in mental illness care, the changing bonds of familial love, and, of course, the binds of grief and anger.
Haunting, poignant and eye-opening, EVERYTHING IS FINE is a testament not only to a brother’s love, but to a family’s ability to heal. Vince Granata is a cadenced, courageous writer you won’t soon forget.
Reviewed by Rebecca Munro
March 18, 2022
This will be the memoir that everyone is talking about in 2021.
Loss and grief are multifaceted things and, in this case, even more so. Vince Granata lost his mother in 2014. She was not the victim of her own disease, but the disease ravishing the mind of one of her children. Vince’s younger brother, suffering from unchecked schizophrenia, murdered their mother in their home one hot July day. In Everything is Fine, Vince shares the shock of this news, his memories of his brother and mother before the murder, and his convoluted path of grief and acceptance.
The details of the Granata family’s pain are difficult to read, but Vince conveys it all poetically. He is transparent in the thoughts he wrestled with throughout and shares a number of pertinent facts about the mental health system, with all of its shortcomings, and the disease that claimed his brother’s mind. It’s worth noting that he makes it clear that schizophrenia and violent crime are not quick to go hand in hand and he advocates for a better understanding of the illness, as a whole.
Knowing that a parent can fight so hard for her child’s mental health only to have it result in her murder is heartbreaking and terrifying. I don’t think there is an easy solution to such things or that anyone necessarily failed anyone else here. It seems everyone did the best they could with the tools at their disposal. That’s what makes it all the more tragic. We are all so limited in what we can give and push for, although the guilt of hindsight often cruelly suggests we could have done more.
Vince Granata’s writing flows beautifully. While tragedy guided him into this cathartic endeavor, it is clear he was born to be a writer. His ability to express himself this way shines through. He broke me several times as he aptly pulled me into the storm of his emotions. He broke me one final time as I read the last few lines of his acknowledgments. His love for his entire family was apparent, but his admiration of his mother and grace toward his struggling brother were, more than anything, the pulse of the narrative.
Although this was one of the most difficult books I’ve ever read, I could close it and walk away when it was over. It isn’t my devastating story; the thing I’m forced to breathe in and live with every day. The Granata family will never be able to choose the same. To read a book like this runs the risk of discomfort, but it also promises to nourish compassion and growth.
If my prediction in the beginning of this review is wrong - if this isn’t the memoir of the year - the reading community will be making a terrible mistake. You need to get to know Vince and his family. This is a story of anguish that needed to be told; a story we all need to better comprehend.
Loss and grief are multifaceted things and, in this case, even more so. Vince Granata lost his mother in 2014. She was not the victim of her own disease, but the disease ravishing the mind of one of her children. Vince’s younger brother, suffering from unchecked schizophrenia, murdered their mother in their home one hot July day. In Everything is Fine, Vince shares the shock of this news, his memories of his brother and mother before the murder, and his convoluted path of grief and acceptance.
The details of the Granata family’s pain are difficult to read, but Vince conveys it all poetically. He is transparent in the thoughts he wrestled with throughout and shares a number of pertinent facts about the mental health system, with all of its shortcomings, and the disease that claimed his brother’s mind. It’s worth noting that he makes it clear that schizophrenia and violent crime are not quick to go hand in hand and he advocates for a better understanding of the illness, as a whole.
Knowing that a parent can fight so hard for her child’s mental health only to have it result in her murder is heartbreaking and terrifying. I don’t think there is an easy solution to such things or that anyone necessarily failed anyone else here. It seems everyone did the best they could with the tools at their disposal. That’s what makes it all the more tragic. We are all so limited in what we can give and push for, although the guilt of hindsight often cruelly suggests we could have done more.
Vince Granata’s writing flows beautifully. While tragedy guided him into this cathartic endeavor, it is clear he was born to be a writer. His ability to express himself this way shines through. He broke me several times as he aptly pulled me into the storm of his emotions. He broke me one final time as I read the last few lines of his acknowledgments. His love for his entire family was apparent, but his admiration of his mother and grace toward his struggling brother were, more than anything, the pulse of the narrative.
Although this was one of the most difficult books I’ve ever read, I could close it and walk away when it was over. It isn’t my devastating story; the thing I’m forced to breathe in and live with every day. The Granata family will never be able to choose the same. To read a book like this runs the risk of discomfort, but it also promises to nourish compassion and growth.
If my prediction in the beginning of this review is wrong - if this isn’t the memoir of the year - the reading community will be making a terrible mistake. You need to get to know Vince and his family. This is a story of anguish that needed to be told; a story we all need to better comprehend.
June 5, 2021
One of my top three favorite books of all time is Wally Lamb’s I Know This Much is True. I read IKTMIT in 2000. I make references to this book several times a year and often recommend to friends. The limited series of this book starring Kathryn Hahn and Mark Ruffalo was very exciting to see become a reality recently, as dark and unsettling the content. Much of this novel flashed before me while reading this book, a book that I have just completed but cannot even remember the name. I dont think I will remember the book after this year. Im surprised given the very positive reviews. The memoir and account of the main character amd brother Tim are so incredibly touching and painful to the very last words. IKTMIT was fiction, but the truth from this memoir is so devastating. The truths of so many families pained from loved ones touched with schizophrenia. This is what i will remember from this book. There was something about the writing that I did not like - I can’t put my finger on it, but there was a blandness that I hope I can avoid in my own writing. The first-person perspective seemed stagnant and didn’t push the story along where I would/could care more about these characters. For me, the writing needed more.
November 10, 2021
EVERYTHING IS FINE
VINCE GRANATA
“In this extraordinarily moving memoir about grief, mental illness, and the bonds of family, a writer delves into the tragedy of his mother’s violent death at the hands of his brother who struggled with schizophrenia. Perfect for fans of An Unquiet Mind and The Bright Hour.”
I don't usually read memoirs, but I had to stay with this one until the end. Vince Granata writes about his life with his brother who suffered from schizophrenia with psychotic features of hallucinations, delusions, disorganized and/or bizarre behavior. Sadly enough, brother Tim ended up killing their mother and was then confined for that offense. Coming from a loving and religious family, Vince and his family struggle to maintain a relationship with Tim and separately deal with the violent behavior and results.
The story is heartwrenching and highlights the difficulties of dealing with mental illness as a family. But the difficulties are twofold as the family also has to deal with the criminal court system as well. Issues such as establishing criminal responsibility and ensuring that Tim fully understands the circumstances in which he exists.
5 stars (tear-stained)
Happy Reading!
VINCE GRANATA
“In this extraordinarily moving memoir about grief, mental illness, and the bonds of family, a writer delves into the tragedy of his mother’s violent death at the hands of his brother who struggled with schizophrenia. Perfect for fans of An Unquiet Mind and The Bright Hour.”
I don't usually read memoirs, but I had to stay with this one until the end. Vince Granata writes about his life with his brother who suffered from schizophrenia with psychotic features of hallucinations, delusions, disorganized and/or bizarre behavior. Sadly enough, brother Tim ended up killing their mother and was then confined for that offense. Coming from a loving and religious family, Vince and his family struggle to maintain a relationship with Tim and separately deal with the violent behavior and results.
The story is heartwrenching and highlights the difficulties of dealing with mental illness as a family. But the difficulties are twofold as the family also has to deal with the criminal court system as well. Issues such as establishing criminal responsibility and ensuring that Tim fully understands the circumstances in which he exists.
5 stars (tear-stained)
Happy Reading!
February 22, 2021
Yes, there will be tears reading this story and what is so special about the sharing of this grief is the poignancy, hope, keen insightfulness and awareness that reminds us of what remains of our humanity. Vince Granata inserts delicate and seemingly forgettable moments that pull the reader into his memories as if you are there sitting at the family’s kitchen table with the dogs sniffing at fallen table scraps. It feels odd to write that it was a beautiful read given this harrowing recounting of Granata’s brother while under psychosis killing their mother, but it did feel like such an honorable and touching tribute to their mother, family, friends and community to still remember the joys and strive for understanding while being true to themselves. For all the pain that occurred, the family is a testament to the capacity of gratitude and love. What an arc Granata takes us through from dissecting what do experiences become before a death to the processing of violence to the work of acceptance to be able to come out of the other side.
July 7, 2021
This book will stay with me for a very long time. If you have ever loved someone with mental illness, then you know the rollercoaster ride that this entails. I felt such compassion and understanding for this family. I am thankful that Vince had the courage to write this deep and meaningful memoir.
May 25, 2024
Really hit in the last 10 pages. The author’s younger brother Chris is a good friend of mine from college. Love you man!
February 18, 2022
⚠️ Trigger Warning ⚠️ This book explores the topics of mental illness, specifically schizophrenia and may be triggering for some readers.
A deeply moving and emotional memoir exploring the lives of the Granata family and centered around the death of their matriarch at the hands of her son Tim, propelled by unchecked schizophrenia.
What I loved...
📚 While the subject matter was difficult, this was an incredibly beautiful book exploring the heartbreaking loss of his mother but still recognizing the humanity within his brother. We are invited on Vince's journey of discovery as he learns as much as he can to understand how schizophrenia propelled Tim to actions beyond his thought process or control.
📚 There was a very fine line to straddle between reconciling the brutal murder of his mother and acknowledging his brother as the individual who carried out those actions. In the earlier parts of the book, Vince acknowledged that his initial feelings centered around minimizing the brutality but as we continue reading, we see him reaching the stage of recognizing the two uncomfortable and simultaneous truths as part of his journey to acceptance.
📚 The conversations around mental health issues are necessary and this book handled the topic in a highly respectful manner, while edifying misconceptions and educating the reader.
What I didn't love...
📚 There is nothing I can say here. A necessary and well-written book on a painful and debilitating health condition that was handled with grace and dignity towards all involved.
If you liked this review and like Bookstagram accounts, I would love it if you choose to follow me on Instagram @breatheinbookstt
A deeply moving and emotional memoir exploring the lives of the Granata family and centered around the death of their matriarch at the hands of her son Tim, propelled by unchecked schizophrenia.
What I loved...
📚 While the subject matter was difficult, this was an incredibly beautiful book exploring the heartbreaking loss of his mother but still recognizing the humanity within his brother. We are invited on Vince's journey of discovery as he learns as much as he can to understand how schizophrenia propelled Tim to actions beyond his thought process or control.
📚 There was a very fine line to straddle between reconciling the brutal murder of his mother and acknowledging his brother as the individual who carried out those actions. In the earlier parts of the book, Vince acknowledged that his initial feelings centered around minimizing the brutality but as we continue reading, we see him reaching the stage of recognizing the two uncomfortable and simultaneous truths as part of his journey to acceptance.
📚 The conversations around mental health issues are necessary and this book handled the topic in a highly respectful manner, while edifying misconceptions and educating the reader.
What I didn't love...
📚 There is nothing I can say here. A necessary and well-written book on a painful and debilitating health condition that was handled with grace and dignity towards all involved.
If you liked this review and like Bookstagram accounts, I would love it if you choose to follow me on Instagram @breatheinbookstt
July 24, 2025
Everything is fine - and - I am deeply not after finishing this memoir. A difficult, difficult read - and one filled with so much vulnerability, care, love, empathy, introspection, and grief.
A masterful combination of storytelling, compelling writing, and insightful forays into the reality of severe mental illness. In Vince's own words, "Tim's story is about unserious untreated mental illness leading to violence - and - Tim's story is about a young man who struggled with the worst strain of a terrible disease."
I did in fact sit at my desk crying at work several times while reading this. And yes, I would recommend it.
A masterful combination of storytelling, compelling writing, and insightful forays into the reality of severe mental illness. In Vince's own words, "Tim's story is about unserious untreated mental illness leading to violence - and - Tim's story is about a young man who struggled with the worst strain of a terrible disease."
I did in fact sit at my desk crying at work several times while reading this. And yes, I would recommend it.
February 19, 2023
Devastating. Excellent look at grief for a horrifying situation.
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