Don't Hug Doug

by Carrie Finison, Daniel Wiseman (Illustrator)

Meet Doug, an ordinary kid who doesn’t like hugs, in this fun and exuberant story which aims to spark discussions about bodily autonomy and consent.

Doug doesn’t like hugs. He thinks hugs are too squeezy, too squashy, too squooshy, too smooshy. He doesn’t like hello hugs or goodbye hugs, game-winning home run hugs or dropped ice cream cone hugs, and he definitely doesn’t like birthday hugs. He’d much rather give a high five—or a low five, a side five, a double five, or a spinny five. Yup, some people love hugs; other people don’t. So how can you tell if someone likes hugs or not? There’s only one way to find out: Ask! Because everybody gets to decide for themselves whether they want a hug or not.

Genres: Picture Books, Childrens, Storytime, Fiction, Disability, Friendship, Emotion

32 pages, Hardcover

First published January 26, 2021

About the author

Carrie Finison began her literary career at the age of seven with an idea, a box of markers, and her father’s typewriter. She has been writing off and on ever since, though she has (somewhat regretfully) traded in the typewriter for a laptop. Her picture books include DOZENS OF DOUGHNUTS, illustrated by Brianne Farley (Putnam, 2020) - a Junior Library Guild selection; DON'T HUG DOUG, illustrated by Daniel Wiseman (Putnam, 2021) - an ALA Notable Children's Book; LULU & ZOEY: A SISTER STORY, illustrated by Brittany Jackson (Running Press Kids, 2022); HURRY, LITTLE TORTOISE, TIME FOR SCHOOL, illustrated by Erin Kraan (Random House Studio, 2022). Her latest picture book is PIGS DIG A ROAD (Putnam, 2024) She lives outside Boston with her husband, son, daughter, and two cats who permit her to write in their cozy attic office. Find her online at http://www.carriefinison.com or on Instagram @CarrieFinson. Subscribe to her occasional newsletter for events, giveaways and more: http://www.carriefinison.com/newsletter

Reviews

[Scottsdale Public Library · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a super cute book regarding boundaries! Doug doesn't really like to be hugged, and he says “no thank you” every time someone tries. Instead, Doug gives alternatives on how to interact with him, like a high-five. The book holds great lessons about asking before doing and that it is okay to say “no” to things. I highly recommend! – Alyssa C.

[Sarah Casper · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m a consent educator and I love this book for so many reasons!

I’ve read many children’s books about consent and I’ve noticed that most focus on teaching kids that it’s okay if they don’t want a certain kind of touch and that they have the power to say “no.” These are crucial lessons in consent and bodily autonomy; however, they don’t address the element of “asking,” which is a major piece of consent education, too.

In Don’t Hug Doug, author, Carrie Finison, specifically includes lessons in boundary-setting and respecting others’ choices, as well as, in asking for consent. She does this in a way that kids ages 2-8 can really understand and incorporate into their own lives.

This book teaches kids to:
1) Respect others’ boundaries
2) Have a positive relationship with their own boundaries
3) Find out about others’ boundaries by asking them
4) Ask for alternative kinds of affection
5) Celebrate the unique perspective and interests of each individual

I also love this book because the illustrations (by Daniel Wiseman) and the diverse group of characters are absolutely delightful!

This is a fun book to read because of the story, characters, and the pictures you meet and an important book to read because of the lessons learned.

[Rod Brown · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am not a hugger, so this was pretty easy to identify with. I liked the stress on consent and individuality.

But I did not like the swerve into high fives; we need a sequel about that scourge on humanity (as well as fist bumps). Maybe Don't Flash Dom Your Palm (You Left Hanging Isn't His Problem).

[Kirsti · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fun and funny book that teaches a lesson: If you want to hug someone, ask first. Doug isn't angry or depressed or shy or scared—he just isn't a hugger. He likes high-fives, though!

[Ivonne Rovira · Rating 5 out of 5]

Author Carrie Finison’s Don’t Hug Doug (He Doesn’t Like It) works great for “ordinary kids” like Doug, who just doesn’t like all that touching. But the book is a godsend for children with autism or sensory issues. The picture book reassures readers that kids who don’t like hugs aren’t unfriendly or odd; they just show and appreciate other modes of affection. As the mother of two daughters with autism, including one who definitely doesn’t like hugs, I wish I’d had this book 25 years ago. Thank you, Carrie Finison.

[Rachel Holtzclaw · Rating 5 out of 5]

a really cute book on the importance of consent!! (yes i read this at work, yes this is going to keep happening, IT’S FINE!!!)

[Tricia · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great look at how everyone has different levels of comfort when it comes to physical contact, and an important lesson to learn while one is young. Super cute, highly recommend!

[Danielle · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.75/5 - I wish I had a book like this growing up! Super cute artwork, silly rhyming, and an important message of body autonomy and personal space - what's not to love here!

[Nicole Stanton · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think the book could have been a little shorter and still gotten the point across. It's a cute way to teach consented tho.

[Candida · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great book. It's okay to not like to be touched. It's okay to set boundaries. It's okay to express your likes and dislikes and what you need to feel comfortable. In past generations that was not a thing. So nice that kids today can express themselves. This book is awesome it empowers kids to be able set boundaries and limits. 👍

[Feliciana · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great picture book for introducing consent. I used this with my kindergarten and first grade classes.

[Katrina · Rating 5 out of 5]

Finally a children's picture book with a clear explanation of consent. I might look huggable, but I'm not a big hugger. I've been on a hunt for a book that makes this normal for kids. Love the easy to see illustrations, the straight-forward tone, and its sense of humor. Will definitely be using this in a storytime.

[Hugh Mcdonald · Rating 5 out of 5]

Don’t Hug Doug (He Doesn’t Like It) by Carrie Finison & Daniel Wiseman is a wonderful picture book to introduce consent to kids at a young age & engage older ones in a conversation about it. I love Doug! Looking forward to using this one for a lesson or 2 in my classroom! #McDReads

[Lesley · Rating 4 out of 5]

Don't hug Lesley

[Sharon Phillips · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a wonderful book about Doug , who doesn't like hugs, but he likes lots of other things!

[Kathryn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great to see books like this! I think it's definitely important for all the hug-givers out there as it is a gentle and kind reminder that not everyone likes hugs, no matter how well-intentioned they may be. But it's also important reading for the child who doesn't like hugs, to have this affirmation that it's okay to feel this way and to voice your feelings. It reminds the hugger to "ask first!" And it empowers children (anyone!) to set boundaries. The story is told with a bit of humor, cartoony illustrations (not my favorite style but it works) and a generally upbeat tone. My children (one of whom is not a hugger) really enjoyed it.

[Nathan Bartos · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a fun picture book about asking for permission before touching someone and it being okay if you don't want someone touching you and encouraging children to assert that. I'm going to read it for my phone-a-story picture book at the library.

[Shaye Miller · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is quite an important book for children to read at an early age -- to remind them that others don't always like huge (and that THEY don't have to accept hugs, if they don't want to). It's a very unique idea compared to the generation I grew up in, but today we have a better understand of children's autonomy. I especially liked that the children in this book may not like to hug, but there were other things they'd be happy going, like high-fiving. I enjoyed this book as a read aloud from Schreck Kinowerks.

For more children's literature, middle grade literature, and YA literature reviews, feel free to visit my personal blog at The Miller Memo!

[Evan · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a hugger, this is such a great reminder!

[Rajani LaRocca · Rating 5 out of 5]

With a lighthearted tone, humor, and a fun, rhymy and punny writing style, this fabulous book makes bodily autonomy and consent easy to understand for kids and the adults in their lives. It reminds everyone that even well-intentioned attempts to hug someone aren't okay unless they're wanted. As the frequent recipient of unwanted and sometimes painful cheek squeezes as a child, I wish I'd had this book back then!

[Aleea · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very cute story about a kid who just doesn't like hugs. This is a great way to spark the conversation about our bodies and boundaries with little kids. Doug and the narrator discuss asking others before hugging them and various hug alternatives. The illustrations are bright, the characters are diverse, and the message is clear: don't hug Doug.

[Elizabeth Rachow · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a wonderful book! When I saw this title come across my screen on Goodreads I got so excited and ordered it right away! People need to realize that boundaries need to be respected. I love how it can explain that just because someone does not like hugs does not mean they do not care for you. This is also great during COVID time and for people with mental health issues that cause them to cherish personal space. I would love to see more books just like this!

[Danni Green · Rating 5 out of 5]

This friendly, approachable book validates kids who don't want to hug (sometimes, or ever) and gives clear, judgment-free explanations of how to respect someone's boundaries if you don't know if they want a hug (or if you do know that they don't). I liked the sensitive, playful approach to introducing essential consent behavior!

[Susan · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was obviously written about my 6 year old and he felt very validated!! Right down to only wanting specific bedtime hugs from mama.

Would probably be a beneficial read for over-eager grandparents...

[Bethany · Rating 5 out of 5]

absolutely 100% yes to this. the rhymes, the illustrations, the suggestions to hug alternatives, the idea that there's nothing WRONG with a kid who doesn't like hugs, or other kinds of physical affection.

just, yes to all of this.

[Steph · Rating 5 out of 5]

Doug thinks hugs are too squashy... and too smooshy... and definitely too squeezy! Doug does not like hugs, and this book reminds us to respect personal boundaries and ask before hugging! (High five for Doug!)

[Nicole Darrow · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book on establishing boundaries with others. Cute rhyming and illustrations, humorous.

[Ash · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love a cute book that teaches boundaries! Cute!

[Holly · Rating 5 out of 5]

A most excellent picture book about consent

[Peacegal · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great idea for a book! There are those of us who like our personal space. We might not like hugs (or we may like them only from certain people). And that's okay! This funny, rhyming book introduces us to a kid who does not like hugs--but he's still a great friend. It reassures kids (and adults!) who might not enjoy hugging. It also introduces young readers to the valuable idea of asking someone before you hug them.