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Letters to Gabriel: The True Story of Gabriel Michael Santorum
A collection of letters by the author to her unborn child with an abnormality known as "posterior urethral valve", a defect in which a valve in the urinary system does not open. As a result, the baby is unable to empty fluid from the bladder to the amniotic sac.
132 pages, Hardcover
First published April 9, 1998
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Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
April 10, 2012
Setting the Record Straight
I was suffering from my third miscarriage and seeking a book which would offer me comforting words from a another Catholic mother who had lost a child. I found "Letters to Gabriel" by Karen Garver Santorum. In the pages of the book I got to know Karen as she spoke to her son Gabriel, who was now with God. Gabriel had a urinary tract irregularity which was life threatening, he was not producing urine and was going to die. Karen, a neo-natal nurse and Rick did not accept this, and traveled out of state to a doctor who was able to do inter-uterine surgery. The surgery was successful but left Karen with an infection causing premature labor, and, despite Rick and Karen's best efforts to save him, Gabriel was born to early to survive.
This is the story of a parent's fierce love for their son, a story which has been viciously misrepresented by Rick Santorum's political enemies. I read a piece in The Daily Kos which said Karen had an abortion, and winced as I saw Alan Colmes and Eugene Robinson mock the Santorums' expression of grief over the loss of their precious son. Gabriel was waked at home and buried in the Catholic Church as any other member of the family. Because he is still a member of the family, thanks to the Communion of Saints.
But the story doesn't end at Gabriel's death.Karen tells the story;
"the Senator (Boxer) was thanking the women who had partial birth abortions for coming forward with their stories, . . said she "hears the cries of the women outside this Chamber".
"We would be deafened by the cries of children who are not here to cry because of this procedure," retorted Senator Santorum. The Washington Post described what happened next, 'Republican Senator Rick Santorum turned to face the opposition, and in a high, pleading voice, cried out, "where do we draw the line? Some people have likened this procedure to an appendectomy. This is not an appendix!' he shouted, pointing to a drawing of a fetus, it is a baby. Its a baby.'
"And then, impossibly, in an already hushed gallery . the cry of a baby pierced the room, echoing across the chamber from an outside hallway. Not one mentioned the cry, but for a few seconds no one spoke at all."
Karen continues, "A coincidence? Perhaps. . .or maybe. . it was the cry from the son whose voice we never herd, but whose life had forever changed ours."
Rick concludes, "Sometimes you hear a faint voice inside whispering what you should do. With respect to this issue, I heard the message through a loudspeaker. " (It Takes a Family p 245)
In an interview I did of Rick for Canticle Magazine, he said he felt that it was Gabriel's voice from heaven, supporting his father as he asserted the truth that the unborn is a baby. If ever there was a call to act, this was one. During the interview in late 2007, I told Rick about my daughter Christina who has Down syndrome, and we chatted about the blessing of special needs children. Within a year, baby Isabella Maria Santorum was born with Trisomy 18, an event which Rick said inspired him to run for president, to help create a more welcoming culture for our special needs children.
Letters to Gabriel is a sensitive and comforting book because it reminds a mother who has lost a child whether born to live too briefly, or unborn, that their child matters to God, to her family, and to the world. It is a unique tribute to the value of every human life, and should be a staple on the Catholic family bookshelf. I myself bought several copies, but kept giving them away to friends who had experienced infant loss.
I was suffering from my third miscarriage and seeking a book which would offer me comforting words from a another Catholic mother who had lost a child. I found "Letters to Gabriel" by Karen Garver Santorum. In the pages of the book I got to know Karen as she spoke to her son Gabriel, who was now with God. Gabriel had a urinary tract irregularity which was life threatening, he was not producing urine and was going to die. Karen, a neo-natal nurse and Rick did not accept this, and traveled out of state to a doctor who was able to do inter-uterine surgery. The surgery was successful but left Karen with an infection causing premature labor, and, despite Rick and Karen's best efforts to save him, Gabriel was born to early to survive.
This is the story of a parent's fierce love for their son, a story which has been viciously misrepresented by Rick Santorum's political enemies. I read a piece in The Daily Kos which said Karen had an abortion, and winced as I saw Alan Colmes and Eugene Robinson mock the Santorums' expression of grief over the loss of their precious son. Gabriel was waked at home and buried in the Catholic Church as any other member of the family. Because he is still a member of the family, thanks to the Communion of Saints.
But the story doesn't end at Gabriel's death.Karen tells the story;
"the Senator (Boxer) was thanking the women who had partial birth abortions for coming forward with their stories, . . said she "hears the cries of the women outside this Chamber".
"We would be deafened by the cries of children who are not here to cry because of this procedure," retorted Senator Santorum. The Washington Post described what happened next, 'Republican Senator Rick Santorum turned to face the opposition, and in a high, pleading voice, cried out, "where do we draw the line? Some people have likened this procedure to an appendectomy. This is not an appendix!' he shouted, pointing to a drawing of a fetus, it is a baby. Its a baby.'
"And then, impossibly, in an already hushed gallery . the cry of a baby pierced the room, echoing across the chamber from an outside hallway. Not one mentioned the cry, but for a few seconds no one spoke at all."
Karen continues, "A coincidence? Perhaps. . .or maybe. . it was the cry from the son whose voice we never herd, but whose life had forever changed ours."
Rick concludes, "Sometimes you hear a faint voice inside whispering what you should do. With respect to this issue, I heard the message through a loudspeaker. " (It Takes a Family p 245)
In an interview I did of Rick for Canticle Magazine, he said he felt that it was Gabriel's voice from heaven, supporting his father as he asserted the truth that the unborn is a baby. If ever there was a call to act, this was one. During the interview in late 2007, I told Rick about my daughter Christina who has Down syndrome, and we chatted about the blessing of special needs children. Within a year, baby Isabella Maria Santorum was born with Trisomy 18, an event which Rick said inspired him to run for president, to help create a more welcoming culture for our special needs children.
Letters to Gabriel is a sensitive and comforting book because it reminds a mother who has lost a child whether born to live too briefly, or unborn, that their child matters to God, to her family, and to the world. It is a unique tribute to the value of every human life, and should be a staple on the Catholic family bookshelf. I myself bought several copies, but kept giving them away to friends who had experienced infant loss.
August 28, 2007
My wife and I have also lost a baby. We know the heartbreak. This little book will make you cry. It will also make you proud to live on the same planet with people like the Santorum family.
May 20, 2008
Sad story of a baby miscarried at 20 weeks w/ rare bladder valve condition. Very Catholic, pro-life messages throughout, read it while pregnant with Henry.
Read
December 18, 2011A must read!
December 21, 2015
What a beautiful testament to the sacredness of life! A page-turner, offering a unique story of grieving for the loss of a baby's life, and the depth of faith and love of a mother.
May 12, 2017
I'm a mom, and reading Karen's words brought back a lot of good memories of being pregnant. Karen did such a great job at describing how people are really there for you during grief, of any kind, but then their being uncomfortable with your loss often causes distance and a wish on their part to speed up the grieving process.
But it was in one of the very last chapters that I found the true light of the book for me. In a chapter dated December 14, 1996, Karen writes, that as parents we are consumed with having a healthy baby, a baby that can live a happy, productive life. And that this can cause us both as individuals and as a society to become selective in our acceptance and our love of any child that isn't perfect. Karen goes on to write: "Children are always a burden in one way or the other. What happens when we start to believe that we can choose whether or not to accept the particular burdens a child brings into our lives? Beautifully said. Just beautiful.
I loved the book. It truly helped me to open my eyes to acceptance without perfection.
But it was in one of the very last chapters that I found the true light of the book for me. In a chapter dated December 14, 1996, Karen writes, that as parents we are consumed with having a healthy baby, a baby that can live a happy, productive life. And that this can cause us both as individuals and as a society to become selective in our acceptance and our love of any child that isn't perfect. Karen goes on to write: "Children are always a burden in one way or the other. What happens when we start to believe that we can choose whether or not to accept the particular burdens a child brings into our lives? Beautifully said. Just beautiful.
I loved the book. It truly helped me to open my eyes to acceptance without perfection.
January 26, 2016
An amazing story written in letter form by a mom to her unborn son. The book starts when Karen Santorum finds out she is pregnant with her fourth child and follows through to her pregnancy with her fifth child.
Gabriel Michael Santorum is a miracle. Not for the things he did during his life, but for the lasting impact his life has on those who knew and loved him and also those who never knew him.
His mother's words are compelling. She reaches inside herself and draws on a strength that is not physical, but spiritual.
Faced with the decisions Karen Santorum and her husband had to make, I hope that I would be that strong and trusting in God's will.
Gabriel Michael Santorum is a miracle. Not for the things he did during his life, but for the lasting impact his life has on those who knew and loved him and also those who never knew him.
His mother's words are compelling. She reaches inside herself and draws on a strength that is not physical, but spiritual.
Faced with the decisions Karen Santorum and her husband had to make, I hope that I would be that strong and trusting in God's will.
Read
October 22, 2012This psycho brought her dead baby home to pass around the living room, all swaddled in blankets to "keep him warm". Her kids wanted to dress up their deceased little brother in cute outfits. Somehow this is considered totally normal and appropriate in the context of their lives.
I wouldn't wish her situation on ANYONE, but the Santorums are some seriously sick people.
This book should be titled "The Little Book of Creepy Poor Decisions".
I wouldn't wish her situation on ANYONE, but the Santorums are some seriously sick people.
This book should be titled "The Little Book of Creepy Poor Decisions".
July 7, 2008
This is a sad and thought provoking book about a family and the child they love then lose. The book is true and the family was in the public eye since the father was a Senator at the time.
It just so happened they found out their baby had a small chance of surviving during the time the partial birth abortion was up for debate in the Senate. And they are a pro-life family.
It just so happened they found out their baby had a small chance of surviving during the time the partial birth abortion was up for debate in the Senate. And they are a pro-life family.
June 29, 2017
A moving testimony to the beauty of life and the value and dignity of even the smallest and youngest members of the human race. The love of the author and her husband for their unborn child is palpable in these sincere and heartfelt letters written during the pregnancy, illness and unfortunate death at 20 weeks gestation of their son, Gabriel.
January 5, 2012
Very moving and sad story about the Santorum's 7th child. This is the one he is taking heat over right now - Read the book before deciding.
September 4, 2012
I really liked this book! I read the kindle version, but I couldn't find that version here. I highly recommend it.
April 1, 2013
Heart-wrenching look into the lives and belief system of the Santorums.
August 9, 2018
A beautiful and transparent journey of Gabriel's life and death.
June 6, 2019
Picked this up from the library today and read it easily within the day. This is a hard book to rate, so I'll just share my experience reading it:
Backstory: I'm in the target audience (catholic, pro-life, republican, recent miscarriage) for this book. I met Rick Santorum years ago at a fundraiser and appreciate his political work and Catholic faith. I've also known about this book for a while. I think I tried to read it a while back, but couldn't connect with it.
When I initially picked up the book, it was different and better than I expected. A forward by Mother Teresa?! The author, Karen Santorum, was a registered nurse who worked in the neonatal intensive care unit. She also has a law degree and is married to Rick Santorum. This book is a collection of (mostly) original letters - not intended for publication - that she wrote to her baby during her pregnancy and after the baby's death. On top of that, Rick Santorum was famously debating a ban on partial birth abortion during the course of the book. Wow.
Then I started reading. I didn't connect with her personality. She shares the pregnancy news the same day she finds out with lots of people, including her small children and extended relatives. She also mentioned that with previous pregnancies her brother (eew!) delivered the babies and both sets of grandparents were present in the delivery room (yikes!). When tragedy strikes, she surrounds herself with people for support rather than seeking privacy to process things. This is not wrong per say, but it is the exact opposite of my own cautious and private personality.
Then there is an issue with the ages she initially ascribes to the baby. She discovers the pregnancy on June 25th and later claims the baby is 5 weeks on July 18th. That would make the baby 2 weeks when she discovered the pregnancy, which is medically impossible - if she is using standard medical dating methods. Obviously, she is using an alternative dating method but it is confusing and further disconnected me from the story.
Another huge disconnect for me was the frequent and random changes in language and verb tenses between present and past tense. At some moments, I felt like I was reading the private letters of a mother to the child written at that particular moment in the story (best case scenario for a book). But then there were occasional statements that showed hindsight of what was going to occur - and were clearly not written in the moment.
The intended audience also randomly changed in each chapter between the baby, the reader and God. There are awkwardly placed prayers to God at the end of every chapter (and bible verses at the start of every chapter). I can buy the bible verses as things she read and was reflecting on in the moment she wrote the letter. But did she write prayers to God at the end of her letters to the baby? It was confusing and odd. It felt like manufactured pieces were added to the letters without editing for continuity.
There were also some formatting and spacing issues. LOTS of little issues popped up here and there. Inconsistencies in the writing. Language issues. It was just not well written. There is plenty of ammunition present, if someone wants to discredit/ridicule the book. I considered putting the book down, but it was short (and letters don't always fill each page) and I knew I probably wouldn't pick it up again. I made myself push through to finish the book.
When she goes into premature labor and the baby dies, I cried. I was fortunate to be in a private quiet place and I just pondered things for a while before continuing to read. My tears connected me to the story in a deep way and the writing issues stopped mattering to me. Even with its issues, I can see this book being helpful to women who have experienced losses. I stayed connected with the story in a special way through the remainder of the book.
One final note, I know the author is a strong Catholic, but there was some bad theology surrounding death that crept into her writing. It might just be things people say without really meaning, but I noticed it because I just finished reading a Catholic book on death. She states that God "needs" her baby in heaven. Children don't die because God needs them in heaven. There are also a couple references to her baby becoming an angel or being an angel. Children don't become angels when they die. God created humans and angels; they are two separate types of beings. According to Catholic theology, you can not change from one to the other.
Backstory: I'm in the target audience (catholic, pro-life, republican, recent miscarriage) for this book. I met Rick Santorum years ago at a fundraiser and appreciate his political work and Catholic faith. I've also known about this book for a while. I think I tried to read it a while back, but couldn't connect with it.
When I initially picked up the book, it was different and better than I expected. A forward by Mother Teresa?! The author, Karen Santorum, was a registered nurse who worked in the neonatal intensive care unit. She also has a law degree and is married to Rick Santorum. This book is a collection of (mostly) original letters - not intended for publication - that she wrote to her baby during her pregnancy and after the baby's death. On top of that, Rick Santorum was famously debating a ban on partial birth abortion during the course of the book. Wow.
Then I started reading. I didn't connect with her personality. She shares the pregnancy news the same day she finds out with lots of people, including her small children and extended relatives. She also mentioned that with previous pregnancies her brother (eew!) delivered the babies and both sets of grandparents were present in the delivery room (yikes!). When tragedy strikes, she surrounds herself with people for support rather than seeking privacy to process things. This is not wrong per say, but it is the exact opposite of my own cautious and private personality.
Then there is an issue with the ages she initially ascribes to the baby. She discovers the pregnancy on June 25th and later claims the baby is 5 weeks on July 18th. That would make the baby 2 weeks when she discovered the pregnancy, which is medically impossible - if she is using standard medical dating methods. Obviously, she is using an alternative dating method but it is confusing and further disconnected me from the story.
Another huge disconnect for me was the frequent and random changes in language and verb tenses between present and past tense. At some moments, I felt like I was reading the private letters of a mother to the child written at that particular moment in the story (best case scenario for a book). But then there were occasional statements that showed hindsight of what was going to occur - and were clearly not written in the moment.
The intended audience also randomly changed in each chapter between the baby, the reader and God. There are awkwardly placed prayers to God at the end of every chapter (and bible verses at the start of every chapter). I can buy the bible verses as things she read and was reflecting on in the moment she wrote the letter. But did she write prayers to God at the end of her letters to the baby? It was confusing and odd. It felt like manufactured pieces were added to the letters without editing for continuity.
There were also some formatting and spacing issues. LOTS of little issues popped up here and there. Inconsistencies in the writing. Language issues. It was just not well written. There is plenty of ammunition present, if someone wants to discredit/ridicule the book. I considered putting the book down, but it was short (and letters don't always fill each page) and I knew I probably wouldn't pick it up again. I made myself push through to finish the book.
When she goes into premature labor and the baby dies, I cried. I was fortunate to be in a private quiet place and I just pondered things for a while before continuing to read. My tears connected me to the story in a deep way and the writing issues stopped mattering to me. Even with its issues, I can see this book being helpful to women who have experienced losses. I stayed connected with the story in a special way through the remainder of the book.
One final note, I know the author is a strong Catholic, but there was some bad theology surrounding death that crept into her writing. It might just be things people say without really meaning, but I noticed it because I just finished reading a Catholic book on death. She states that God "needs" her baby in heaven. Children don't die because God needs them in heaven. There are also a couple references to her baby becoming an angel or being an angel. Children don't become angels when they die. God created humans and angels; they are two separate types of beings. According to Catholic theology, you can not change from one to the other.
October 21, 2023
A peek inside the life of a family that lost a child at birth. Perspective.
January 11, 2024
I would give this zero stars. This was a MANDATORY book I had to read in freshman year of highschool. Pro life propaganda.
January 24, 2012
Heartbreaking and moving.
Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews