When No One Understands: Letters to a Teenager on Life, Loss, and the Hard Road to Adulthood

by Brad Sachs

When Amanda first came to Dr. Sachs for treatment, she had attempted suicide more than once. Withdrawn and cynical, she refused to speak during her therapy sessions. Determined to connect, Dr. Sachs tried something he wrote letters to Amanda between sessions and invited her to write back, thinking she might feel more comfortable opening up in this way—and indeed she did. This correspondence gradually built trust between them, helping her to survive and ultimately to heal. When No One Understands consists of twenty letters that Dr. Sachs wrote to Amanda over the course of her therapy. In these letters, Sachs reaches out to Amanda with the core message that there is nothing wrong with her—that adolescence is painful, complex, and challenging for everyone and that her emotional pain deserves to be honored, openly explored, and viewed with compassion. Dr. Sachs also addresses many of the common questions and concerns shared by all teens on such topics as relationships, breakups, drugs and alcohol, parents, family dynamics, and more. Along the way, Dr. Sachs offers adults an inspiring image of a truly open, human-to-human relationship between an adult and a teenager. Parents, mental health professionals, guidance counselors, educators, and others who work with teens will see how they might also bring honesty, compassion, and humility to bear in their interactions with young people in order to create truly healing and supportive relationships.

Genres: Nonfiction, Psychology

160 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2007

Reviews

[Jackie Wayman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Right on information for a teen that may be having difficulty relating to the world around her. Succint and heart-felt reaction to actions of a lost soul reaching out for a safety net. Invaluable responses to tough questions!

[Laurie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Read this book (from the library) cover to cover in one sitting. Engaging, empathetic.

[Jen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked up this book for two different reasons: to help prepare me for my son's upcoming teenage years, and to pre-read this book for a co-worker who is starting to have problems with her teenage daughter. What I got out of it sortof fit my purpose, but I ended up learning much more about myself, family dynamics and relationships than I had intended. Brad Sachs approaches some very "normal" subjects about teenage and adult lives and presents a perspective on them that is informative and straightforward and yet gentle and reassuring.

This book is probably best for those parents who have teenage girls or for teenage girls to read themselves. I would guess it would be a starting point for some frank conversation, or at least some mutual understand of this tumultuous time.

[Tori · Rating 5 out of 5]

Short, to the point, potentially helpful. I liked the attitude--instead of labeling or attaching blame, he tries to help by offering a different perspective on the challenges of growing up and providing sometimes odd theories to account for why people might be acting the way they do. Since the enclosed letters were written to one specific teen, it is easy to dismiss any advice that does not resonate as not being aimed at you, thus (I think) making it easier to accept advice that does seem germane as coming from someone who might be right.

[Briana · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was a decent book, not great or anything. Would have been ten times better if he would have included the letters that she had written too. Without her letters it basically became a book of random advice on life or whatever the girl was struggling with. It is hard to identify with a character that is absent and share in their struggles...which is something that I prefer when I am reading "self-help" books or whatever category you want to throw it in.

[Tj · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book since I have an interest in psychology. The Dr & therapist that writes this book is very intelligent and has many great points. Sometimes he may be a bit too intelligent and wordy, as he is writing to a teenager. But overall, I appreciated it.

[Monicavalverde2003 · Rating 3 out of 5]

Bon llibre que ens parla de l'adolescència com a un moment clau a la vida on apareix la crisi de deixar de ser infants per a passar a ser adults. Un intercanvi de cartes entre un psicòleg i una noia en situació delicada, quan no troba la seva sortida.
De fàcil lectura i amb bones idees!

[Gina Barnett · Rating 4 out of 5]

Foster growth and healing the suicidal teen

[Lindsay · Rating 2 out of 5]

Quite dull, it would have been better if the responses to his letters were also included.

[Megan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really really interesting. A different perspective.

[Harriet · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fantastic!!...Letters between counselor and teenager...deals with depression.