The Longing: Embracing the Deepest Truth of Who You Are

by Joey O'Connor

Are you ready to discover God's love in a whole new way? Do you know you are a chosen, loved and accepted child of God?Without consciously knowing the questions," says Joey O'Connor, "our hearts are asking, 'Do I belong? Will people like me? Am I lovable? Will people accept me for who I am? Will I be chosen?' Ever since we were children, our hearts have hungered to know whose we are." In The Longing, Joey O'Connor offers an uplifting, fresh view of God's relentless love, giving you a whole new vision of how you see yourself and others. Your love and commitment to Christ will grow as a result.



The Longing includes Book Club and Bible Study Leader Discussion Questions.You also receive access to free ebooks and webinars from The Grove Center for the Arts & Media, a Southern California arts non-profit organization founded by Joey O'Connor. The Grove Center for the Arts & Media exists to cultivate the spiritual life and creative work of artists.

Genres: Nonfiction

162 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 2004

About the author

Hey there Goodreads Friends!

Just in time for 2026, I just released my latest book, Living Fully Loved: Cultivating Curiosity, Creativity, and Wonder as the Beloved of God.

My book offers you the transformative and inspiring truth that God sees you, God knows you, and God loves you.

You are fully loved.

Join me as we explore soul-stirring questions to help you live as a beloved child of God. Through compelling stories, relevant scriptures, and a creative pathway to living as the Beloved of God, I invite you to imagine the life-transforming possibilities of living fully loved.

Cultivate your curiosity, creativity, and wonder by pursuing the full and abundant life promised by Jesus.

You can also purchase the Living Fully Loved Devotional Journal that offers new content and plenty of space to write guided questions, your prayers, and reflections.

Living Fully Loved is available on my website and all online retailers...if you'd like a FREE REVIEW copy please message me and I'd be happy to send you one!

Be sure to check out my romantic thriller, The Cobalt Curse.

The Cobalt Curse is a wild international ride through Dubai, Washington D.C., Brussels, Rwanda, and the Congo.

In visually stunning imagery, you'll follow human rights lawyer Dr. Kai Baldwin launch a daring search to rescue his former fiancée kidnapped in the Congo by a cryptocurrency titan set on controlling the world's cobalt resources.

My story is based on true events and my travels to the Eastern Congo, as well as heavy research into conflict minerals (cobalt), cryptocurrency, and technology.

If you read my previous historical fiction novel (AMONG KINGS), you'll discover mind-blowing information about the Congo, Central Africa, and the conflict minerals trade.

My story is timely and culturally relevant because your cell phones and mine need cobalt mined by children and families in the Congo (much of it illegally).

Here's a bit more about me...

I am an award-winning author and screenwriter of twenty-five books for couples, parents, and young adults. I'm also the founder of The Grove Center for the Arts & Media, an arts organization dedicated to cultivating the spiritual life and creative work of artists. I'm an Ironman athlete and live in San Clemente, California.

For entertaining and inspirational posts for your creative life, you can follow me on...

https://www.instagram.com/joeyoconnor3

https://www.tiktok.com/@joeyoc1

http://www.facebook.com/joeyaoconnor

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKaK...

https://www.x.com/JoeyTheGrove

To see all of my books, visit

https://joeyoc.myshopify.com

Reviews

[Erin Davern]

Excellent wisdom and encouragement for anyone struggling with their identity, self-esteem, purpose and pain whether it's emotional and/or physical. It's refreshment for the soul with biblical examples to validate the points made. Anyone can benefit from the spiritual lessons taught in this book that puts in plain and simple terms God's abounding love for us and our true purpose. It provides hope to those wrestling with their faith and sound perspective on life's difficulties with inspirational examples given from the author's own life.

[Lee Gunter]

I suppose it’s a good thing to say, “This book is recommended for a type of person I can think of in a circumstance I am aware of”. It seems to me to be another thing altogether to say, “This book was for me in the place I am right now”. Joey O’Connor’s book “The Longing” asks the reader to look at themselves in light of Christ’s sacrifice and love for us; to examine our life I light of God’s promises. For such a short book Joey digs deeply into the subject of knowing who we are – and who we are not. I was consistently throughout the book thinking of other people I knew who would be blessed by the words of encouragement and Christ centered validation that make up the core message of this volume. And each chapters focus seemed to bring to mind someone new.

Joey writes as a real guy with real problems in a real world. My world. Your world. I suppose there are people out there who this book is not for. If you know exactly where you’re going, never doubt or waver, have believed unbendingly every promise God has ever made for every second of your life… if you live a perfectly balanced life of getting everything you want done accomplished, have a rich and consistent quiet time with God, balance work, church, family, devotional and recreation time perfectly and know beyond a doubt that every thing you do and sat is keeping you in the dead center of God’s will for your life, have never been sidetracked or had your plans go awry… this book is probably not for you. Go back to making toys, because your name must be Santa Claus. Otherwise, I highly recommend giving it a look.

[Terry Joy]

I really really wanted to like this book. In fact I really really needed a book that could help me and advise me. I thought this would be the one. I’m sorry to say it isn’t.
It means well, but it just meanders. It doesn’t ever get to the point. I read good reviews about it but unfortunately, for myself, it just left me feeling quite empty. I expected more.

[Macradeur]

Many of us live our lives believing, without any doubt, that God loves us. We can warmly recite “Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so”. Yet for some for us, the degree to which we truly experience being God’s beloved — chosen, accepted and fully loved — doesn't go much deeper than this familiar childhood rhyme.

In The Longing, O’Conner invites us not just to believe God loves us, but to truly experience it - daily, personally, and deeply.
O’Conner writes with honesty and compassion, illuminating our deep human longing to be chosen, loved, valued, and accepted for who we are as unique individuals. He invites us to spend some time reflecting on our lived experience of being eternally loved by God.
To guide this reflection, he offers a variety of thoughtful prompts. These help us explore how - and possibly why - our experience of God’s love can feel distant or diminished at times.
He challenges us to consider what might be standing in the way of moving beyond mere belief. What voices/messages from the past distort our view of ourselves? What if we stepped into full acceptance — that we are created, chosen, and deeply loved?
O’Conner invites us to imagine: What might our lives look like if we truly saw ourselves as God sees us?
I know for myself that when I am in those moments of allowing Gods love into my heart, I ‘become’ more the person God made me to be: more loving, more giving, more productive, more peaceful. Yet remaining in those moments can be elusive.

Here is where The Longing differentiates itself from other inspirational books. In the final chapter, O’Conner offers a list of questions, based on each of the previous chapters, which encourage the reader to pause, reflect, and listen — not just with the ears, but with the heart. He provides actionable steps to help us choose a more fruitful, joyful path in our walk with God.

Thoughtfully engaging with these questions will most likely take some work. However, if you are longing to experience more of God’s love — not just know about it, but live from it — this book will be a faithful guide. Read it slowly, let it speak, and allow yourself to become familiar with being God’s beloved.

[Jdavid]

The Longing expounds on the Gospel message in all its beauty and fullness reminding us that we must return to the truths in God's word that we are loved by God, redeemed by Jesus' blood, and now have a place in God's own family. Surrounded by a world that only feeds us messages of self-indulgence, we all to often buy into the myth that we can heal ourselves. But our souls long to be reunited with their creator and Father through Jesus Christ. O'Conner takes us on a heartfelt journey allowing us to peer into his own family dynamic and personal experiences that reflect the truth that God is our Father and will not abandon us, but instead wants us to experience the healing power of his Love. For someone who has struggled seeing God as gracious and a Father who longs to lavish his love on us, the Longing proved to be just what I needed to help reshape my view of God as my Father. Thanks, Joey.

[Eli]

What an incredible book about acceptance. How we truly ARE already accepted and no longer need to strive for it! Run don't walk to read it! What a huge sense of peace you will feel and truly have! A book to return to often, I found myself frequently thinking of loved ones who I thought would find spiritual nourishment and healing by reading this book. Joey O'Connor has an engaging style that is friendly, personable and real world relevant.

[Laura Knoerr]

I am currently in the process of reading it and admire the author's frankness and style of writing.

[David Zailer]

I have long been an admirer of O'Connor's work. The Longing is his finest. It will knock off your religious socks, and clothe your inner vulnerabilities with grace.

[Sandra Furuvald]

Love this author. He has supported me personally on my own journey to becoming an author. His insight in this book gives great perspective on many areas of life.

[Marie Nimmo]

Amazing. I have underlined sooo much. This book is just wonderful. My heart feels loved by God after reading this. I have recommended it to a friend. Was just what my broken heart needed.

[Vickie Jameson]

Great Book

I used this book during my morning devotional time. It is a thought-provoking, easy to read book that helps the reader see themselves as God sees them. The words are encouraging and deep, giving the reader the opportunity to explore the difference between how they may see/think of themselves compared to God's view of the same. I look forward to reading more by this author.

[Christene]

Sometimes we search for who we are or what is our purpose and the answer is often so simple- This book helped me in my search. If you are searching this is a great read

[Edwina Nelson]

A Transformative and Heartfelt Journey

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"The Longing" by Joey O'Connor is nothing short of a life-changing experience. From the very first page, I felt seen and understood, as if Joey O'Connor had written this book specifically for me. His ability to tap into the deep, unspoken questions we all carry, Do I belong? Am I lovable?, is truly profound.

What makes The Longing stand out is how it offers such an uplifting and refreshing perspective on God’s relentless love. It doesn't just tell you that you are loved, chosen, and accepted—it shows you, in the most beautiful way, how deeply God cherishes us. Every chapter feels like a warm embrace, reminding us that we are His, and that nothing can separate us from that truth.

O'Connor's writing is not only insightful but also incredibly compassionate. His words have a way of reigniting a deeper love and commitment to Christ, reminding us of the simple yet powerful truth that we are never alone, and we are always loved, just as we are.

I cannot recommend this book enough to anyone seeking to deepen their relationship with God or find peace in knowing their true worth. It will stir your soul, challenge your thinking, and ultimately leave you with a renewed sense of hope. Joey O'Connor, thank you for this masterpiece, The Longing has given me a new vision of how I see myself and others in the light of God’s love.

This is a must-read for anyone who desires a closer walk with God. Truly, it’s a gift for the heart!

[Brian]

The title is slightly misleading.

I went into this reading slightly skeptical, as one who does not believe
self help books are a useful tool in the pursuit of wisdom. Never the less I wanted to give it a chance because gems of truth can be hidden anywhere and can help people act well.

Joey O'Connor does contain some real life insights and seems to be a man capable of leading a happy life. As important as this trait is in life, it does not give him the ability to draw all the conclusions that are spelled out in "The Longing".

Our author equates a godless life and a loveless life and never goes on the show evidence that the two are necessarily equated. Is it his point of view that a person who does not believe in this Christian god can not be a loving person? Does the O'Connor believe that all those who have faith in his god automatically become loving people?

The book goes on to say, Yes, turning to God and Jesus is the answer for everyone. For the woman who had a less than loving father, that created a hole in her personalty. She tried to fill that hole with a husband, and it did not work because only faith in god could help her. For the author's own daughter, who broke a souvenir in a gift shop and was immediate forgiven by her loving dad, faith is still the answer. Joey O'Connor tries to present these two scenarios to show that Jesus is for everyone, but fails to see that they are not evidence for his God. They are merely a testament to the human fear the unknown and the penchant to turn to the religion despite background or upbringing.

Yet if the religious life does turn people to more loving and kind focuses then maybe it would be for all the best anyway.
"We don't earn God's favor by our good works, how much money we donate, or how nice we are to our neighbors. Nice is not enough."
Joey O'Connor claims this and then continues that Jesus Christ and faith are the answer. This is the focus of all religions, and the reason is so the establishment can take advantage of human fear and put it towards their own ends, and their own lives.

Inside the front cover Mr. O'Connor wrote a note referencing the title, but changing one word. "Who you are" becomes "Whose you are". This subtle change lets you know that the author know longer feels the purpose of life is to figure out purpose of self and the importance of individualism. He now thinks that the person is an owned and kept being that owes his or her life to a greater being. The Longing is not a self help book at all, but a Christian missionary statement.

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In compliance with FTC guidelines, I'm disclosing that I received this book for free through Goodreads Giveaways.

[Peg]

The Longing: Embracing the Deepest Truth of Who You are by Joey O'Connor. This paperback book was provided to me free-of-charge by GreatReads, FirstReads. If you already have the gift of faith and practice it on a daily basis (as I do), you may feel that you don't need to read this book. However, I recommend reading it anyway because it does such a great job of reinforcing your beliefs.

If you have doubts about our Creator, His Son, or the Holy Spirit, you will find this book to be of remendous help. It stresses the unconditional love of God the Father and how you are chosen, accepted and loved. We all need to be chosen, accepted and loved and it's all available to us. All we have to do is to acknowledge it's availability and it's ours! Pastor O'Connor does a clear and enthusiastic job of guiding us in the right direction. He uses family and personal experiences to relate the messages he wants us to know. It all makes for an enjoyable and educational spiritual read.

So many of us ask "Who Am I" and instead we should be asking "Whose Am I." This book certainly answers that question.

I appreciate getting this book because it has helped me to learn more about the love of God!! Pastor O'Connor, thank you for taking the time to share your spiritual knowledge of His love and for sending this book to me.

[Annette]

The Longing is well written and insightful. It left me longing for more. Not from any lack on the part of the book, but the lack in my own life. If only I were less human. Thank God, He accepts me just as I am. Even if we continue to questions ourselves and our lives, we could all breath a little easier if we could just remember the truths in this book. The truth of God's mercy and love. This book will make you think, and maybe make you spend a little more time on your knees.

[Marcy]

This is such a great book! It's a quick read (for the busy folk like me) but still manages to touch on some very deep themes. Joey has an ability to explain deep ideas (such as longing) in a very concise and clear way, pulling from his own life experiences, quotes from others, and Scripture. For a full-ish review on this book, you can read my post: http://marcypusey.wordpress.com/2012/...

[Tracy]

Excellent journey to fulfilling the longing of every person.

[Buckeyebet]

Joey O'Connor gives basic introduction to knowing our identify in God. I feel the book could have gone deeper although maybe it was cathartic for the author to record the events he details.