The Stepfamily Handbook:: From Dating, to Getting Serious, to forming a "Blended Family"

by Karen Bonnell, Patricia Papernow

You’ve met someone!!! And they have a kiddo (or a few) and you’re wondering what that’s going to mean for your relationship. Or perhaps, you’re the one with a kiddo (or a few), and you want to be sure you get this part right for both your dating partner and your child.“The Stepfamily From Dating to Getting Serious to Forming a ‘Blended Family’” provides essential guidance to parents who are dating and to those who are dating a parent. From those very first dates to including the kids to progressing to that big, important step of living together – this book is for you!Here’s what you’ll and how to introduce children to a dating partner – and some critical do’s and don’ts when you meet the kids. (We’ll offer a few key considerations to set you up for success.)How to increase the amount of time spent all together with children – without turning the fun into a stress-mess. (What? That’s tricky? Read on…you’ll discover why kiddos don’t always jump on a parent’s dating train – and what to do about it.)A roadmap through what we call the “Five Stepfamily Challenges.” These challenges will likely start surfacing long before you’re thinking about living together. They’ll grow in intensity as your relationship gets more serious. (Trust You’ll want these practical, proven tips to meet each challenge as they show up.)Developmentally specific pointers for ushering children through the struggles of sharing a parent’s attention with another adult (and perhaps other children).Research-based information on best practices for parenting, stepparenting and discipline as time together increases and you find you have really different ideas about what to do when the children act … like children.Valuable tips for maintaining a cordial relationship with a permanent player in your relationship — the co-parent (ex-spouse) — the children’s other parent. (Like it or not, this important person will have an impact on your dating relationship pretty much from the start. You’ll definitely want to get this part right.)A solid set of tried-and-true communication skills to help you constructively navigate the inevitable bumps and glitches once kids are involved in your dating relationship. ( You’ll find that as you enter this new relationship phase – adding the kids – you’ll likely face a surprising amount of complexity and conflict!)

Genres: Parenting, Relationships, Nonfiction

314 pages, Kindle Edition

Published July 22, 2020

Reviews

[Haley Schwalm · Rating 5 out of 5]

So much great information with specific recommendations based on different family structures and situations. Very enlightening.

[Charles Ulveling · Rating 5 out of 5]

As someone who is about to be moving in with a new partner, who has kids of their own, this book was essential reading. And not just once, but a book I know I’ll revisit time and time again as we move forward in our new stage of life.If you were someone you know was thinking about blending their family, this should be an automatic purchase for them.

[Lori · Rating 4 out of 5]

A must-read for anyone blending families, this covered so many scenarios and walked me through a lot of things that had never even entered my mind

[Amanda Hawkes · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is great if you have or are going to be blending families. It tells you some of the things to look out for and the best way to approach certain topics. I highly recommend this book

[Daniel Jones · Rating 4 out of 5]

Overall good book with good information. Sometimes a bit repetitive, and the examples seemed fake and truncated, but the information and advice was good.

[Angelita · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read only two chapters of this book around dating someone who is coparenting. Super helpful! I’d recommend.

[sylas · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very normative overall, but the most helpful book I’ve seen on this topic. Decent enough to use as a guardrail.

[Karen Cockerill · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another wonderful resources to help one sidestep typical “blending” errors and help find easier ways to transition into a new second family to find a longer term stability.

[Cameron Kelly-Johnson · Rating 4 out of 5]

A good primer on how to approach dating with children, and the process of how step families become cemented. The advice is clear and down to Earth. Challenges are presented well and with examples. Back up by research and a large resource section. It includes worksheets and skill that can be implemented, are well thought out, and truly actionable.

[Greg · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book. It should be standard-issue for anyone dating or thinking about a next-time family after a divorce.