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No One To Save Me
It happened one night not long after that holiday. I think they had been out but I’m not sure. I remember I was sleeping in my bed when the noises of my mum and him getting home awoke me. Suddenly, my bedroom door opened but it wasn’t my mum. I didn’t know where she was. It was him. I pretended to be asleep. He came to the side of the bed and I didn’t know what was happening but my mind told me to stay still. He pulled the covers back, I didn’t move. I kept my eyes closed. My heart felt like it was jumping out of my chest. He lifted my legs apart and I let them move. He pulled up my nightdress and pulled my pants down. I didn’t even try to open my eyes.
Imagine being an innocent 7-year-old girl with a broke, single mum. Now imagine your mum meets a man that can give her a nice house and a better life in exchange for you. That’s what happened to me. For years I suffered neglect and psychological and sexual abuse from him, with my mum being a silent witness. I had No One to Save Me, yet I survived.
Imagine being an innocent 7-year-old girl with a broke, single mum. Now imagine your mum meets a man that can give her a nice house and a better life in exchange for you. That’s what happened to me. For years I suffered neglect and psychological and sexual abuse from him, with my mum being a silent witness. I had No One to Save Me, yet I survived.
- GenresNonfiction
ebook
Published July 28, 2020
122 people are currently reading
97 people want to read
About the author
Melissa Jordan
1 book8 followersMelissa Jordan is my pen name.
I am from Northern Ireland and I have written a memoir detailing my childhood abuse at the hands of my mother and her partner. I have changed the names to protect my identity, my sisters and that of my child.
I have produced an audiobook of No One To Save Me, narrated by a native of Northern Ireland. It will be available in Audible from December 2020.
I am going to continue to self-publish books under my pen name. My main focus being self-help books tackling the issues that I personally have faced. In my next book I want to explore Life after Abuse. The effects abuse has on a child and how those are carried forward into adulthood. I want to explore what it takes to heal so you can trust again. If you can't have trust, then you will never be truly happy.
please email me at melissajordanbooks@gmail.com
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Displaying 1 - 25 of 25 reviews
October 13, 2020
I had goosebumps while reading this book. I was shocked, moved, touched by the events the author had to go through. I salute to her courage to bring her life in public. Hats off to her, I hope peace and love for her. Good Luck Melissa, and here is wishing you all the very best for all your future endeavours.
October 29, 2020
A story of hope
This book shines a light on some of the darkest sides of our broken society: child sexual abuse.
It is a captivating and touching story of resilience. I wish this never happens to heroine of the story but sadly it did happen and it is a true story. I find myself caught in the lines of this book. I was touched to tears, and enraged at the same time. “How does this happen? How could this happen?” I ask myself several times while reading the book. I was even more shocked to discover the sentence that the abuser got. Then, I remember that I needed to forgive the abuser because I became so angry at him while reading the book.
Fortunately, the heroine of this book was was a resilient and an overcomer who succeeded to overcome her past and turn her life around. And, today she is sharing her story to inspire others. How courageous she is to speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves by sharing her story and letting us know that something to change in our society and that something needs to be done!
This books gives hope to all of us knowing that there is a way out of the darkness.
An amazing book of truth, honesty, and resilience!
This book shines a light on some of the darkest sides of our broken society: child sexual abuse.
It is a captivating and touching story of resilience. I wish this never happens to heroine of the story but sadly it did happen and it is a true story. I find myself caught in the lines of this book. I was touched to tears, and enraged at the same time. “How does this happen? How could this happen?” I ask myself several times while reading the book. I was even more shocked to discover the sentence that the abuser got. Then, I remember that I needed to forgive the abuser because I became so angry at him while reading the book.
Fortunately, the heroine of this book was was a resilient and an overcomer who succeeded to overcome her past and turn her life around. And, today she is sharing her story to inspire others. How courageous she is to speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves by sharing her story and letting us know that something to change in our society and that something needs to be done!
This books gives hope to all of us knowing that there is a way out of the darkness.
An amazing book of truth, honesty, and resilience!
October 7, 2020
No One To Save Me is the most harrowing of tales about a poor little child who ‘fell through cracks’, failing to be saved from the monster who tormented her, almost to death. The most awful, harrowing and disgusting sentence I may have ever read, referring to the abuse and neglect of this child is ‘It was just not convenient’ (for adults to take action).
I have been on over two years of training to work with vulnerable children. My local authority should have saved themselves the trouble and sat us down for Melissa Jordan to read us all No One to Save Me. And then they should sit down our wards, to be inspired by Melissa and shown a light.
Beautifully written.
I could barely bring myself to write the author’s name against my references to that poor broken child - and shame on me for that.
I have been on over two years of training to work with vulnerable children. My local authority should have saved themselves the trouble and sat us down for Melissa Jordan to read us all No One to Save Me. And then they should sit down our wards, to be inspired by Melissa and shown a light.
Beautifully written.
I could barely bring myself to write the author’s name against my references to that poor broken child - and shame on me for that.
October 12, 2020
Writing is difficult, it is even more difficult when it is your story. I can only applaud anyone who has the strength and courage to put their story out into the world for others. By writing your story you open the door for others who are being victimized to find courage, strength, and empowerment.
Thank you for this powerful book.
Thank you for this powerful book.
October 20, 2020
Deepest Respect
This book pulls you in all directions and makes you want to shout out loud to try and protect that little girl from the despicable things that life and thrown at her from such a young, vulnerable age. I have the deepest respect for the author and my best wishes to you and your little family for the future.
This book pulls you in all directions and makes you want to shout out loud to try and protect that little girl from the despicable things that life and thrown at her from such a young, vulnerable age. I have the deepest respect for the author and my best wishes to you and your little family for the future.
May 27, 2021
This was a story that caused so many emotions while listening . To know it's a true story makes it even worse. Don't get me wrong I recommend it highly. A story full of abuse neglect and worst of all a horrible mother. It was a heart wrenching story for sure. Very well written & the narration was outstanding. I could give more than 5 stars if possible.
October 7, 2020
This is an honest account of one courageous woman as she recounts her trauma of abuse as a child. Some parts were difficult to read. However, the author has bravely put pen to paper to share this with others. I hope she continues to recover.
November 15, 2020
Sad story of seven year old...
Well written, sad, disturbing happenings of a girl, from seven years of age. No mother should ever allow this to happen. In my view, she should have had to give an account just like "he" did.
Well written, sad, disturbing happenings of a girl, from seven years of age. No mother should ever allow this to happen. In my view, she should have had to give an account just like "he" did.
June 19, 2021
A really hard but amazing read
I thought this book was really honest what courage you have shown especially about your feelings towards your mum & son, I'm so happy your life is on the up even though it's a work in progress, good luck and much love to you x
I thought this book was really honest what courage you have shown especially about your feelings towards your mum & son, I'm so happy your life is on the up even though it's a work in progress, good luck and much love to you x
April 6, 2021
This story is a story of strength and redemption of the human spirit. The author did a great job of telling her story and letting us into her world. Very well done.
April 25, 2021
Thank you for sharing your story
This is a true sad story about how sexual abuse can affect the whole life of the victim. It is written in a honest way which I really appreciate. I recommend this book.
This is a true sad story about how sexual abuse can affect the whole life of the victim. It is written in a honest way which I really appreciate. I recommend this book.
September 18, 2020
No One To Save Me is a descriptive story of the life of a Survivor. The Author recounts the years long events of mental, psychological, emotional, physical and sexual abuse she suffered as a child at the hands of her step father. She describes the extensive grooming process this monster used to make her become "normalized" with his Sick depravities as well as make others believe they had a normal relationship. All of this was made possible due to her own mother's initial and intentional lack of awareness followed by her mother's acceptance of the situation in order to maintain her own lifestyle. The trauma had such a profound mental and emotional effect on the victim that it is truly a miracle that she survived, let alone thrived after such trauma. The Author has been acknowledged as having the strength and courage to save her little sister from the same evil and ensuring the child molesting pervert was locked away. Now, with a young family of her own, this author has decided to share her story to show the world that horrific abuses can be happening inside the most normal-looking households and people aroumd them are either unaware, or too self-absorbed to notice and take protective actions. She is also sharing her experiences to show others that they can survive after such events and that whatever shame they may feel is NOT their shame to carry. All shame, embarrassment, guilt, and blame belong to the adults who committed these evil acts as well as the caregivers who willingly allow it to happen to innocent children. Everyone needs to read this book to gain a better understanding of abuse and how it is hidden in plain sight in so many cases. The Author did a wonderful job of creating a book that is masterfully written and easy to follow.
September 20, 2020
This book was very heartbreaking. The child was not given a chance to have a childhood, love and hope for her nightmare to end. I cannot comprehend how a mother could turn a blind eye to their child being abused and not be there to defend her. I am so sorry it took so long to find someone to help and eventually to find love. I am disappointed in the sentence the perpetrator got, definitely not long enough in my view. So glad the author had the insight to know that it was better for her son to not live with her while she healed. Don't know that I could have trusted my mother with my child though, but I understand the thinking behind it to protect her son from being placed with strangers; at least child protective services were there to oversee how he was being treated.
September 24, 2020
"I didn't know it then but my childhood was over," one sentence whose starkness stares the reader in the face. The author preface ends with these positive words "I am a normal, everyday person. I survived." thus inviting the reader to plunge into the book, aware that there's pain to be found among the pages but also hope and victory. This portrayal is what sets this book apart from other survivor accounts. Recommended! Cathartic!
August 30, 2020
“No One to Save Me” is the story of a child’s sexual abuse at the hands of her father. Make that step-father. It’s a story with detail you might imagine but somehow can’t bear to think of actually happening. It’s a harrowing tale.
Melissa Jordan was abandoned by her biological father at two years of age. Her nuclear family becomes her mother and her maternal grandparents, whom she calls Nanny and Daddy. When her mother takes up with a man, Jordan begins a portrait of a predator: a man who has been searching for victims, a woman with a young daughter, a woman “weak enough, vulnerable and easy to manipulate.” Thus begin years of domestic horror.
Jordan, she says, is “groomed” for his fantasies, which he acts out. First this grooming amounts to a regime of control. The man/husband/step-father (“I’m not going to tell you his name,” she says. “I don’t want to write it. He doesn’t deserve it”) uses social class differences to intimidate, reminding the mother of where she and her daughter come from; he objects to their language, urging them to speak properly; and he gradually pries them away from Nanny and Daddy, promising safety and security, all the while planning to satisfy his perverse desires.
And so, in the early chapters, the unspeakable details emerge. She is subjected to what no child should ever be subjected to.
In the longer section of the book, she describes the lifelong consequences: her fraught experiences with trust and friendship, her difficulties with intimacy and relationships with men as her adult years begin, her use of alcohol and drugs to dull the endless pain. She describes herself as borderline OCD. In time, with the help of counseling and social services, she confronts her abuser. There is a legal action. But there is no easing of the pain.
Perhaps most complicated and wrenching in this story is Jordan’s relationship with her mother, whom she deeply resents--because the mother knew. Jordan can’t bring herself to admit that her mother knew. She writes, “When I had spilled it all, [the social worker] said you need to tell your mum. I didn’t tell her that mum already knew. I had held that part back because I didn’t want anyone to know I had a mum that let this all happen.” Holding back this admission, Jordan reveals, is necessary for her recovery, for her own state of mind.
It is also a way of protecting her mother and step-sister (fathered by the abuser). “If I had told the truth about her involvement,” Jordan writes, “she wouldn’t have my sister in her care, money in her bank and a new house to live in. She could have been charged and sent to prison the same as him. I saved my sister and my mum as well.”
A cruel irony in this awful story of abuse and survival. She saves others.
Melissa Jordan was abandoned by her biological father at two years of age. Her nuclear family becomes her mother and her maternal grandparents, whom she calls Nanny and Daddy. When her mother takes up with a man, Jordan begins a portrait of a predator: a man who has been searching for victims, a woman with a young daughter, a woman “weak enough, vulnerable and easy to manipulate.” Thus begin years of domestic horror.
Jordan, she says, is “groomed” for his fantasies, which he acts out. First this grooming amounts to a regime of control. The man/husband/step-father (“I’m not going to tell you his name,” she says. “I don’t want to write it. He doesn’t deserve it”) uses social class differences to intimidate, reminding the mother of where she and her daughter come from; he objects to their language, urging them to speak properly; and he gradually pries them away from Nanny and Daddy, promising safety and security, all the while planning to satisfy his perverse desires.
And so, in the early chapters, the unspeakable details emerge. She is subjected to what no child should ever be subjected to.
In the longer section of the book, she describes the lifelong consequences: her fraught experiences with trust and friendship, her difficulties with intimacy and relationships with men as her adult years begin, her use of alcohol and drugs to dull the endless pain. She describes herself as borderline OCD. In time, with the help of counseling and social services, she confronts her abuser. There is a legal action. But there is no easing of the pain.
Perhaps most complicated and wrenching in this story is Jordan’s relationship with her mother, whom she deeply resents--because the mother knew. Jordan can’t bring herself to admit that her mother knew. She writes, “When I had spilled it all, [the social worker] said you need to tell your mum. I didn’t tell her that mum already knew. I had held that part back because I didn’t want anyone to know I had a mum that let this all happen.” Holding back this admission, Jordan reveals, is necessary for her recovery, for her own state of mind.
It is also a way of protecting her mother and step-sister (fathered by the abuser). “If I had told the truth about her involvement,” Jordan writes, “she wouldn’t have my sister in her care, money in her bank and a new house to live in. She could have been charged and sent to prison the same as him. I saved my sister and my mum as well.”
A cruel irony in this awful story of abuse and survival. She saves others.
September 15, 2020
Brilliant read
I hope you achieve all your goals in life your story had me in tears a few times I wish you all the best for the future and I hope you continue to stay in good health
I hope you achieve all your goals in life your story had me in tears a few times I wish you all the best for the future and I hope you continue to stay in good health
October 13, 2020
NO ONE TO SAVE ME by MELISSA JORDAN is a harrowing tale of child abuse, and no child should suffer this way. I can’t relate to children suffering such horrendous abuse because I have no experience of it in my life, so all I can do is condemn the perpetrators and their vile actions. I had tears in my eyes from reading this book, and you have my heartfelt sympathy. 5 stars. Posted by Elijah, son of Michael S.
October 22, 2024
I couldn’t put this down. It was so relatable it so many heartbreaking ways. Thank you. 🖤
August 26, 2020
What a powerful read. I was beyond shocked when I read this book for sure. This book was such a shock that I would have to lay it down, and that is why it took me a few days to read this. It was entirely worth it! It sickens me when an adult abuses a child. No one giving a shit on what the outcome will be in the end. This is a powerful read, and bravo to the author. It was well formatted, and very easy to read.
November 15, 2020
She tells many women's stories in hers.
This book is so good. It's not going to make you laugh and it may make you cry but needs to be read . She tells of childhood sexual abuse from a victims experience. I thank her for telling a story so many of us can't talk about yet.
I got this book in trade for an honest review.
This book is so good. It's not going to make you laugh and it may make you cry but needs to be read . She tells of childhood sexual abuse from a victims experience. I thank her for telling a story so many of us can't talk about yet.
I got this book in trade for an honest review.
January 1, 2021
Really good read
I read this book in one sitting I just couldn’t put it down , such a sad story but very well written
I read this book in one sitting I just couldn’t put it down , such a sad story but very well written
October 20, 2021
I was recommended this book to read by a friend. I choose the Audio version due to having a number of other books currently on the go. It wouldn't normally be the kind of book i would choose but I thought as it was based in the country where i live i would try it.
Firstly the narrators voice of Eleanor shannon was very easy to listen too and she used tones throughout the book to convey the feelings of Melissa well and kept you captivated.
It's not an easy book to digest, i found myself taking breaks as some content were hard to listen too but then i put myself in Melissa's shoes and felt if i feel this bad how could she have felt.
To hear the complete story of her life and what she endured through up feelings of heartbreak, anger, sadness, happiness and love. It was a rollercoaster book of emotions but one everyone should read. As a mother myself to girls i wanted to give them an extra big hug and protect them each moment even more.
I applaud Melissa for standing up for herself, for keeping going through all the dark times and glad that her life is turning in a new direction and evolving. I am glad she seeked help and was able to get it and her therapy journey continues in a positive approach.
Wishing her and Jack all the love and happiness. x
Firstly the narrators voice of Eleanor shannon was very easy to listen too and she used tones throughout the book to convey the feelings of Melissa well and kept you captivated.
It's not an easy book to digest, i found myself taking breaks as some content were hard to listen too but then i put myself in Melissa's shoes and felt if i feel this bad how could she have felt.
To hear the complete story of her life and what she endured through up feelings of heartbreak, anger, sadness, happiness and love. It was a rollercoaster book of emotions but one everyone should read. As a mother myself to girls i wanted to give them an extra big hug and protect them each moment even more.
I applaud Melissa for standing up for herself, for keeping going through all the dark times and glad that her life is turning in a new direction and evolving. I am glad she seeked help and was able to get it and her therapy journey continues in a positive approach.
Wishing her and Jack all the love and happiness. x
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 18, 2022
Short, but captivating and intense story about a survivor of sexual child abuse. I really felt with the author and her pain and struggles.
Recently I have read many books about that theme. I don't really know why I do, because it isn't like I have personal experience with that. I know why I started, though. I have read a contemporary book, where several characters of the book were victims of child abuse. And it was shown how far those experiences have impacted their lives. And after that book I had the urge to know more about that and get a deeper understanding. Though, I got an understanding about myself, too, because even though I wasn't a victim of sexual child abuse, I was a victim of bullying. And trauma is trauma and has often similar effects on the psyche and health.
Generally, I think child abuse and violence in every form is terrible, and it is important to bring attention to it, so that as many children as possible get saved or at least are recognized before it can happen.
I can't understand, why people look away and don't do anything. I really got angry with her mum, too. It was like that she sold her daughter to that man. And he only got 9 years for that crime.
And she got years of struggle and thoughts about killing herself.
Recently I have read many books about that theme. I don't really know why I do, because it isn't like I have personal experience with that. I know why I started, though. I have read a contemporary book, where several characters of the book were victims of child abuse. And it was shown how far those experiences have impacted their lives. And after that book I had the urge to know more about that and get a deeper understanding. Though, I got an understanding about myself, too, because even though I wasn't a victim of sexual child abuse, I was a victim of bullying. And trauma is trauma and has often similar effects on the psyche and health.
Generally, I think child abuse and violence in every form is terrible, and it is important to bring attention to it, so that as many children as possible get saved or at least are recognized before it can happen.
I can't understand, why people look away and don't do anything. I really got angry with her mum, too. It was like that she sold her daughter to that man. And he only got 9 years for that crime.
And she got years of struggle and thoughts about killing herself.
April 25, 2023
Amazing book on Survival
Great book for anyone who has or even may be going through any type of abuse. There is hope to survive. There are different roads to hope and survival. I chosed Jesus Christ as my Hope. Melissa chosed a different road... But, we are both are Survivalors. Thank you for sharing your story. ✨
Great book for anyone who has or even may be going through any type of abuse. There is hope to survive. There are different roads to hope and survival. I chosed Jesus Christ as my Hope. Melissa chosed a different road... But, we are both are Survivalors. Thank you for sharing your story. ✨
February 25, 2022
sad but happy
Im happy I read your book, thank you for sharing your story. Hopefully things are even bretter in your life now!
Im happy I read your book, thank you for sharing your story. Hopefully things are even bretter in your life now!
Displaying 1 - 25 of 25 reviews