4-5 stars.
If you don’t know who the wonderful Claud is, then you’ve probably not got access to Strictly Come Dancing (institution in our house) or her latest The Traitors(new obsession). She is quite simply hilarious, so witty and possibly a national treasure. That last one is not up for discussion 😂. Anyway, the long fringed, double dip (for that extra tan), boot loving, black jean, winter obsessed has penned her thoughts. Quite. Check out SCD especially when Vito is giving one of his explanations. Anyway, here goes.
I wish I could take your advice on napping Claud and am fully appreciative of your advanced napping skills but it is beyond me. Never mastered the art. However, as to your advice re boots, 💯 with you and I’ll carry on swaggering in mine. I do have a confession though, I have bought some sock boots (sorry, apparently they don’t pass the Claud test) but in my defence I have the skinniest legs since Olive Oil and these don’t waft in the breeze. I don’t agree on winter as it has no redeeming features (I rest my case with 23/24) other than a great pair of boots and my favourite faux fur, black of course. As to the fringe, mine is short, is that ok or too Larry Hagman? In my defence I’m vertically challenged (just ask my granddaughter who just sighs) and if mine was as long as yours I’d probably be permanently on the deck. As to packing, I’d give you a run for your money although you are probably worse than me. Two particular disasters spring to mind. End of term. I was a zombie and for inexplicable reasons we went straight off on holiday to the West Country. Overnight stay in posh hotel in Wells where I discovered I had packed EIGHT pairs of white trousers (I mean who on earth needs that many and I didn’t even know I did), no tops, no shorts, no dresses. I had plenty of underwear tg and loads of shoes. Emergency trip to Exeter with long suffering husband. This summer. Holiday beginning of September. Don’t be ridiculous we won’t get a heatwave so I’ll pack plenty of jumpers cos it’ll get chilly at night. Yes. Heatwave. Nothing suitable. The only holidays I get right are Scotland and the Lakes. I’ll stick to those. I’m with you on skiing ( vertically challenged, so no surprise there), I love art so I’ll definitely go and see the Titian next time I’m in Venice( she says grandly) and the Caravaggio next time I’m in fantastic London. I’ll even ride The Tube. I’m totally with you on them leaving home 🥲 and a whole lot else. However, if I went with your eye make up advice I would look like a giant panda. You get away with it. Probably cos of the fringe.
Anyway - enough waffling. I chortled my way through this. It’s a darn good read.
Thanks to Kindle Unlimited for sending it as a suggestion. One of your best.