Voices of LGBTQ+: A Conversation Starter for Understanding, Supporting and Protecting Gay, Bi, Trans, and Queer People

by Lynda [Wolters] Riggers

Voices of LGBTQ+ will open your eyes to see people do not always fit the picture of “normal” we see on social media and television, yet they are no less human than you or I. These are your children, your friends, your co-workers, your neighbors, maybe even your parents. Voices of LGBTQ+ gives insight to:

• Homelessness
• Hate crimes
• Suicide
• Economic challenges
• Discrimination and lack of equality
• Religion and biblical conflicts

Before you avoid, reject, or shun people you do not understand, step back, and imagine what that would feel like and learn how your acceptance can make a difference.

Genres: Nonfiction, LGBT

178 pages, Hardcover

Published August 4, 2020

About the author

I am a native of Idaho and grew up a farmer's daughter in a tiny rural town of 400 people. I have worked in the legal field for 30+ years, and have three amazing sons, two fabulous daughters-in-law, one incredible granddaughter, and two grand-furbabies.

I enjoy ballroom dancing, Netflix binging, and hanging out with my peekapoo (Pekingese poodle), Max.

I am a cancer thriver, diagnosed with Mantle Cell Lymphoma - I'm thrilled to say I've already outlived the "average" expectancy. (If you are curious, my cancer color is lime green.)

I have a heart for volunteering and everything underdog - people, animals, and teams.

I believe every book should be given a chance and that none, no matter the content, should be banned - it is up to us to monitor our intake or that of our littles, not an administration of any kind.

Reviews

[Louisa · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book is an absolute pile of garbage. The author introduces trans issues by talking about how one of her sons changed his name and said he never wanted to be referred to by his deadname again. She then refers to him by his deadname at least a dozen times or so and publishes a book with that information in it. If you can’t see why this is extremely problematic, you really shouldn’t be writing a book on queer issues.

[EM · Rating 1 out of 5]

A prime example of why queer stories need to be told by queer voices. There is SO much the author gets wrong. I mean really, it's so bad. Please please don't read this book if you want to learn about the LGBTQIA+ Community. There are so many good books out there by queer authors, please read them instead.

[Rhi Fanning · Rating 1 out of 5]

Transphobic and unacceptable. I can’t believe this person had the audacity to even write it, let alone PUBLISH this for others to read.
Don’t deadname your kids. Don’t create a queer hierarchy from your imagination with no research to back it up. And please stop pretending to be an ally.

[Chantal · Rating 1 out of 5]

It's unfortunate that this book was written in 2020, as it reads like something written in 1985. While there was a lot of statistical information to understand, this book repeatedly dehumanizes LGBTQIA+ individuals, putting them in boxes, pitting them against each other, and enforcing societal norms. I would love clarification on which "voices" are being highlighted here, as it seems the author is one of few sources. If you are elevating LGBTQIA+ people, then their voices should be the main voices, not the voice of an ally.

[Ali Owens · Rating 1 out of 5]

Lynda Wolter, though not part of the LGBT community, had taken it upon herself to write about us despite clearly having little knowledge or experience that might qualify her to do so. This is extremely problematic.

First of all, a cisgender heterosexual person is in no position to explain “LGBTQ+ voices.” There is no shortage of ACTUAL LGBTQ+ VOICES sharing our lived experiences - we don’t need someone outside the community to speak for us.

Second, the author herself left a comment (as a five-star review, of course) on this page, most likely after receiving negative feedback about the harmful nature of her book, in which she essentially doubled down and explained that the book was written from the perspective of a “novice.” Is that supposed to neutralize the criticism? A novice has no business positioning themselves as an authority by way of writing a book, ESPECIALLY when the subject of that book is a marginalized community that she herself doesn’t belong to. She stated she “wouldn’t change a thing” about the way the book was written, despite offering up an explanation of the hierarchy within the LGBT community that reads like something she overheard from a group of middle schoolers, with absolutely no evidence to back it up. I’d change a thing or two. In fact, I’d change the fact that this book was even published at all, and instead elevate the ACTUAL LGBTQ+ VOICES that are so often silenced by drivel like this.

Bottom line: we are not exotic zoo animals in a lab to be studied. We are people whose stories matter, and it is NOT up to a straight cis person to tell those stories on our behalf. Skip this book and read something written by an actual queer person with lived experience instead.

[Vide · Rating 1 out of 5]

Did not finish: overall feeling: this book should not exist. It talks about lgbtq+ from the view of someone who has no clue or respect for it whatsoever but seems to claim things as truth. For instance, repeatedly deadnaming, and explaining the "hierarchy" of the better and worse kind of people within the community. A cis voice viewing things through their own lens and deciding they have the knowledge to write about it I this way is problematic at best.

[Kip · Rating 1 out of 5]

Couldn't finish even the introduction where she talks about how "fascinating" and "interesting" we are in her absolutely false interpretation of the "queer hierarchy." If the introduction is anything to go by—and it should be, considering how the first part of the book is what is supposed to hook the reader—this is a pile of misinformation by a cishet person who has no business writing about anything pertaining to queer people or communities.

[Krystin · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book is terrible. It reads like the author read about being gay online when she was in high school and felt no need to do further research. It's disrespectful, laughably inaccurate, and bordering on maliciously spreading lies. Do not read.

[Katie Clement · Rating 5 out of 5]

Voices of LGBTQ expands our awareness and understanding for the LGBTQ community taking us on the path of what it’s like to live in the shoes of someone who is gay, lesbian, transgender or any party of the LGBTQ acronym, a person who is only trying to be accepted, received and loved for who they are by society, their friends and most importantly their family.

As a mother with a child in the LGBTQ community and more specifically the transgender community, I feel that this book truly gives these people, our children, and my child, a voice that definitely needs to be heard. This book is rich with resourceful insights and jam packed with the right “need to know” facts for those who struggle accepting or understanding the LGBT community. If you are offended easily with firm beliefs in your religion and are not open, you may not enjoy this book. Though I was not offended, and I don't think most readers would be. For me it was a reminder that there will always be separation among man as that is part of life, but I am grateful to have books like this to help shed light on something many know so little about. It ignites an absolute possibility to open minds of so many that if it wasn’t printed would stay closed, only sustaining the violence, abuse, depression and trauma that these individuals face.

[Stephanie · Rating 1 out of 5]

The author is not a queer voice, she opens the conversation on trans people by using the fact that her son (who is not trans) changed his name.. then she continues to use his [deadname]. She puts the community as a hierarchy and then decides for herself who is on top. Books like this cause people to have all the wrong ideas and still act self righteous because 'I read a book called Voices of ... I don't care that there wasn't a queer voice in sight'.

Please read books by actual queer authors!!

[Amancay · Rating 1 out of 5]

"There is a social order within the LGBTQ+ community." Thus begins a page filled with some of the most hateful BS I've read in a long time. Wolter claims that enby folks aren't even part of the community, that trans people are at the bottom, that "lipstick lesbians" are the sexiest. It's gross and incredibly harmful to report this as some unbiased fact she gleaned in the wild.

[Denae · Rating 1 out of 5]

"Allies" should stop writing such nonsense and instead let members of the lgbtq+ community speak for ourselves. Wolters lacks basic understanding of lgbtq+ experiences and identities.

[Jude · Rating 1 out of 5]

No “voices of LGBTQ+” here. Just one cishet voice, describing us as though we’re a weird species of insect. Dehumanizing trash, unless it’s supposed to be a parody but even then it’s too disgusting.

[Samantha Miller · Rating 1 out of 5]

Author obviously is not a part of the LGBTQIA+ community and has no idea about it at all.

[Shannon Hansen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Voices of LGBTQ+ is an such an important book. As the title implies, it can be a great jumping-off point for conversations about LGBTQ+ topics. By helping tell the stories of some wonderful LGBTQ+ people in her world, Lynda helps humanize and personalize a topic that can often unfortunately be politicized and misunderstood. The stories told in this book are hopeful, heartbreaking, inspiring, ironic, and sometimes humorous....not unlike the stories of anyone who isn't LGBTQ+. That's exactly the point that I take away from this book. While the specifics of the people highlighted in this book are unique to the LGBTQ+ experience, their struggles, aspirations, successes, and lives are rich and meaningful just like everyone else. And just like all of us, LGBTQ+ people deserve love and respect. I'm keeping my copy handy to share with anyone in my life who wants to know more about how they can best show up and support their LGBTQ+ family and friends.

[Shanreadsnwrites · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book is utter violence to the LGBTQ community. This book is not “LGBTQ voices” but a voice of a white cishet Karen mom poorly trying to “humanize” queer folks - but all she does is perpetuate horrible stereotypes. WHERE ARE THE LGBTQ VOICES?! All that’s there is her not-needed voice. Her father who legislated against queer rights - “a hero” - and she had the AUDACITY to call this book a good thing - when she calls LGBTQ children “skeletons in the closet” 🤮 Zero stars. Could not make it past the first chapter. And this book was published in 2020?! Please. Have queer voices tell their own story instead of centering your own narrative Karen. A disgrace. And my library had this out for Pride Month! The over is entirely misleading and I think that’s what she’s trying to do.

[Geoff · Rating 3 out of 5]

My Recommendation: I'm split on my response. I absolutely think it could be incredibly helpful for a parent or family member trying to come to terms with a loved one coming out, but I think it could've been done a lot better. Wolters has an approachable writing style that was an easy read, but that can't overcome the fact that she fell into many of the common mistakes people make when first learning about the LGBTQ+ community and I think her work suffers because of that. She really missed the opportunity to make it personal in an attempt to talk about a diverse global movement, when that could be the one thing that needs to click for someone to be more open or accepting of a loved one.

My Response: Uhhh.... A for effort?

I said yes to this one when the publisher reached out with a review copy way back in July (it's been a long year obviously), because it sounded interesting and was nonfiction.*

I was obviously going to come into it with some bias, as a gay man I'm clearly going to have opinions, but I'm also going to come into it with a lot more education and history knowledge, holding an advanced degree in gender, sexuality, and queer theory. And frankly my thoughts are divided on this book. Did Wolters do a good job of starting a conversation and representing the individuals she interviewed? More or less. If I were judging the book solely on this she would've gotten four stars.

Click here to continue reading on my book blog at geoffwhaley.com.

*I received a copy of Voices of LGBTQ+ from the publisher in return for my honest opinion. No goods or money were exchanged.

[Lynda Riggers · Rating 5 out of 5]

It is very odd re-reading the book I wrote a couple years ago. I am sure people understand it takes time for a book to get from completion to publication to circulation and then to a place where others want to talk about it - Voices of LGBTQ+ is to that point and I am humbled and awed. THANK YOU, those of you who have supported this book and the people in the LGBTQ+ community.

***

I was asked, through a recent book club question about the book, if, after three years (from the time I wrote it until now), I would write it differently. My first blush response was “Heck yah, I am much more in-tune with the LGBTQ+ community now.” But, after finishing the book today, I can honestly say no, I wouldn’t change anything.

When I wrote the book I wasn’t totally in-tune with the community, being more on the fringe and only just meeting most of the people I wrote about. Given this, the book comes from a novice place, not an expert, which is exactly where we all start when we encounter something new, something different, something unknown - at the beginning.

Voices of LGBTQ+ is anecdotal and factual, and three years later, I am still very proud of the people who talked with me and shared their stories in order to help start a positive conversation regarding the hopes, dreams, and difficulties of those in the LGBTQ+ community.

[Jennifer (Jenny) Andrusak · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this before I saw reviews for it. There’s things she got wrong and there’s some things in here she got right. There’s definitely some outdated thinking in it. You can tell she cares though. I think some parts could have been excluded/rewritten. I think for her intended audience it might help get them rethinking some of their prejudices and looking for change. Some of the things written are definitely not up with the times though. Probably not the best book to look for representation and accuracy but there were some parts I liked too.

[Nichole Williams · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a great and easy read! Highly recommend for anyone who is struggling to understand the LGBTQ+ people in their life, or for anyone that is simply trying to educate themselves.