Your Grief, Your Way: A Year of Practical Guidance and Comfort After Loss

by Shelby Forsythia

Comforting words and practical ideas for living with loss.

Everyone experiences grief differently after the loss of a loved one. Some people find solace in comforting quotes and warm words, while others feel a need to take action--to do something to memorialize their loss. And some benefit from both approaches. Here's a path forward for you, no matter how you process your grief.
Your Grief, Your Way features:
- Multiple ways to process grief: Find relief through short meditations, mindful reframings, journaling prompts, concrete actions, and more.
- A year of daily messages of comfort: Each page includes a quote and a short paragraph about grief along with a practical tip--something you can do to tend to your grief.
- Comfort and practicality in short spurts: Discover strength and support in these bite-size nuggets, since grief reduces the ability to focus.
- Quotes from a wide range of grievers: Tend to your grief with thoughtful words of people who have been in your shoes.

Whether you're looking for inspiration, a practical way to honor your loved one, or both, Your Grief, Your Way helps you navigate life after loss.

Genres: Grief, Nonfiction, Self Help, Mental Health, Audiobook

208 pages, Paperback

Published September 29, 2020

About the author

Shelby Forsythia (she/her) is a grief coach, author, and podcast host. In 2020, she founded Life After Loss Academy, an online course and community that has helped dozens of grievers grow and find their way after death, divorce, diagnosis, and other major life transitions.

Following her mother’s death in 2013, Shelby began calling herself a “student of grief” and now devotes her days to reading, writing, and speaking about loss. Through a combination of mindfulness tools and intuitive, open-ended questions, she guides her clients to welcome grief as a teacher and create meaningful lives that honor and include the heartbreaks they’ve faced. Her work has been featured in Huffington Post, Bustle, and The Oprah Magazine.

Reviews

[Marianne · Rating 3 out of 5]

A nice daily read that will leave you feeling less alone!

[Gundis · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am a grief expert. Well at least I experienced a lot of death including my mum when I was 11 and my dad just two years afterwards. And as if this wasn´t sufficient my husband died of a terrible brain cancer in January 2019. But here I am with three wonderful and beautiful kids aged 4, 3 and 3, desperate for answers and good books. And there is lot out there, but what makes “your grief, your way” so outstanding are the small portions that really vary.
I loved the exercise where you are asked to take 5 random words and take them to describe the person. It is so important to keep the memory for the kids and this is such a lovely idea without any great offer.
And there are great quotations with deeper explanation like the curiosity of a final missing step on a stair from Snicket with the comparison of groundlessness, as if somebody is pulling the rug from under you again and again. Oh this brought it back and it is so much to the point. You think you are up on your feed again and wondering what to do next, and there is the next wave and bummmm you are on all fourth, full with tears and wondering if you are ever able to get up again.
But also this lovely advises, you can mourn for as long as you want. And from all the gazillions of advises you are confronted with you are allowed to take the ones that suit you best.
Well I could continue forever… I just really liked it a lot and hope it will help you too.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

*thank you to Netgalley, Shelby Forsythia and Zeitgeist for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review*


5 stars.

This book is amazing. Grieving is probably the hardest thing we will ever go through and a time in our lives where we appreciate, even more so, the little comforts of those people and messages around us that help us, even a tiny bit, to be able to manage our way through the pain. This book isn't long. It's not a whole lot of reading. It's short little, helpful little comforts.

What I appreciated most about this book, was that you don't have to read it the standard way from the beginning to the end. You can flip to any page and begin reading, or even read it backwards.

When grieving, reading can become really difficult, so that's why the messages in this book are short and to the point.

I'm really appreciating this book to help me through one of the biggest losses I'll ever face right now. I would highly, highly recommend to anyone, to read this while going through the grief process.

[Lisa Gray · Rating 5 out of 5]

wow, I love love love this book. As a therapist, I've most often recommended Megan Devine's awesome book "It's OK that you're not OK" as a grief resource. But there are two problems with her book: it is really irreverent, which can be super comforting if you are irreverent yourself or really angry, but doesn't resonate with everyone. And, grieving people have a hard time reading - I know I couldn't read for over a year after my brother died. What is fantastic about Shelby's book is that it is in a "year devotional" style (not religious) - where each day of the year there is a short page with a practice or some information that is useful. Often there are quotes from others, which gives multiple perspectives. Some of the entries just give information about the grieving process itself and what is normal to expect. Some give activities you can try (I love how she always makes it clear that her ideas won't work for everyone). Some give resources - I think it's so great how she is willing to share every resource she's come across, even when it has nothing to do with her own "brand". All in all, this book is a fantastic resource for information, ideas and activities - and should be accessible even if you are grieving and reading seems overwhelming.

[Jeanine Lebsack · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book came into my life when I needed it the most. I held it in my hands as I dissolved into tears and I held it in my heart as the author Shelby’s words had voiced my own fears. I sat in awe at the clarity I felt after reading each carefully curated quote and the message for each day. This book is so unique in its style of addressing grief, there are no “you should” “you could” rules to follow when grieving. I’ve personally had to say goodbye to four of my loved ones in less than a year and I’ve felt exhausted as my heart ached for those last moments I had for a memory to hold onto. The exercises included to honour your lost loved one were so therapeutic and helpful for me. Shelby’s beautiful tone and reassuring writing style brought me into a warm, loving, hug that I so desperately needed. Anyone who has walked the path of a grief journey would benefit from reading this lovely book, I know I sure did! I love this book so much I’ve been sharing it with everyone I connect with. Thank you Shelby for touching hearts and minds with your own personal grief journey and strategies that helped you walk through it.

[Sabrina · Rating 5 out of 5]

I liked the format of this book. Small bits of advice and wisdom broken down in a daily format even though there wasn’t a structured order to the quotes and proverbs. You could glean on to the suggestions that might be helpful for you and toss aside the ideas that you know are not meant for you. Thank you to the author for making it clear that we personalize our own path of learning to healing.

The most helpful takeaway for me is to understand that when you experience grief, it becomes a part of your life. As you learn to move forward with living, you must learn how to carry the grief with you since it will always be there. I believe that understanding that you don’t “get over it” as many people actually think happens, but instead that you learn to carry it with you like a piece of luggage (some days small and other days a large piece of luggage) will allow me to visualize a future for myself.

[Jean · Rating 5 out of 5]

I like this book a lot. I just lost my brother last week. This book has been a big help to me put things in perspective. What a wonderful gift for anyone suffering through grief.

Thank you, NetGalley, for this special book at a time I needed to read it. It is a treasure.

[Natalyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Anyone who have ever been through the grieving process, this one is for you. There's no right or wrong way to grieve. Often, you reach for whatever you think might help. Shelby Forsythia's "Your Grief, Your Way" might be just the right resource for you. A compact daily prompt, each day holds something different for you to do, read, or think on.

I think this book was harder for me to review than I thought it would be. It's been a few years now and as I'm sure you can guess, the pain doesn't fully go away. I read this book quickly, rather than a day at a time so the processing was much more overwhelming than I had anticipated. That being said, remember to have grace and be careful with yourself while grieving.

While I don't agree with every technique or method mention in this book, I think that it's a great stepping stone. What works for me might not work for someone else and vice versa. This book offers many many options, so you can find what serves you best.

I gave this book 4 stars because I feel it has real helping potential for someone going through a loss. My mom made me a kind of prompt journal while I was mourning and I think that the prompts gave me peace. I don't know that a whole year of this book would have been helpful for me, but there were definitely things I learned and reassurances I needed throughout.

Thanks to NetGalley and Zeitgeist for this ARC in exchange for my honest review!

[Brittney Hafner · Rating 5 out of 5]

***I would recommend this to anyone who has ever lost a loved one or even someone who is dealing with grief in another way.***

I found ‘Your Grief, Your Way’ to be very well written. I found it very insightful, I had just lost a family member back in June and though I wasn’t extremely close to them I was able to come to a point in my mind where I wasn’t feeling like a horrible person for not letting it have a long-lasting effect on me. I was even able to see how some of the things that were talked about in Shelby Forsythia’s book could be used for different types of grief that aren’t related to death to a physical person but also my old self.

I really believe that this book should be something that everyone reads because even though we might not have something extremely drastic happen yet such as losing a parent, a child, or a spouse we have all dealt with loss in some way, and to be honest we will eventually go through a loss of someone who has had a huge impact in my life.

Something else I want to point out is how you can read as much of it in a day as you need, but Shelby has paced it out where you can read a page or two each day of the year so you can exercise the advice she gives.

I feel privileged to be able to get a hold of this book before I really needed it because now I have the knowledge of what’s inside and can definitely see myself reading it again when the time comes where a loved one’s loss causes more grief then I feel I can handle.

***I received and voluntarily read an e-ARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts and opinions are my own.***

[Christine Johansson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent resource for people who are trying to navigate the difficult path of grief. Each day provides insightful, compassionate information that covers a wide range of topics, including dealing with holidays, handling friendships that change with loss, physical changes (such as grief brain), basic self care and how to begin to return to life after loss. Shelby is honest and never minimizes how hard loss is ("choosing to live after someone you love has died is one of the hardest choices we make") but she also provide real, platitude-free hope and practical exercises and resources to start the journey back.

[Carol Custer · Rating 5 out of 5]

After losing my husband recently, I've been reading a lot of books on grief and coping. This one is the best by far. With short, concise chapters and down=to-earth suggestions, this book provides comfort and a sense of peacefulness to grieving. I think my favorite suggestion was to add a phrase to everything I do when I feel I'm not doing enough. Just add - 'while grieving' to whatever you're doing. It makes a difference and helps one realize we're doing the best we can.

I would recommend this book for anyone experiencing grief - whether for loss of a loved one or - in these uncertain times - the loss of life that we know it.

[Betty Churchill · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book spoke to me in so many ways. Was not overwhelming, but came with so much thought provoking information that I found so helpful in dealing with my ongoing grief. So many books are difficult to absorb when you feel so immersed in dealing with a loss. This book is quite the opposite. It's something that I can pick up at any time and find something beneficial and that I may never had envisioned. Thank you for writing a book so meaningful to so many.

[Elisabeth · Rating 4 out of 5]

A nice brief book in a calendar format of different activities and a quote for each day of the year, giving ideas and prompting on how one may want to deal with grief, and how to communicate that to people around them. Grief is immensely personal and does not follow a set path or stepped programme. The activities though are very useful and can help to set clear boundaries to the person, and make sure to keep around them the people who understand these boundaries and support unconditionally.

[Dora Okeyo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Grief got me to read this book after I'd had it on my shelf for over a month and who knew that daily messages, reminders of the journey, the feelings and insights could be this comforting?
Thanks Netgalley for the eARC. I believe that this is the kind of book to reach out to and keep close at a time as this.

[Traci · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wish I Had This Sooner

I lost my mom in 2019, and the remainder of that year and the year 2020 were extremely hard to navigate. I was grasping for anything to keep me afloat and feeling like I must be the only one feeling what I was feeling. I ended up joining a grief recovery group, which helped to a point. I wish I'd had this book as well. I will be recommending it to anyone who may need a life vest after loss. Thank you so much for this gift, Ms. Forsythia.

[Me · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've read a lot of grief books. This is a decent book on the topic, a great day to day book on the grieving process.

I've recommended it to many a client.

[Lisa Thai · Rating 5 out of 5]

“What is grief if not love persevering?”
— WandaVision 2021

[Anthony · Rating 3 out of 5]

Shelby Forsythia (2020) YOUR GRIEF, YOUR WAY (AUDIOBOOK)
BorrowBox - Books On Tape

⭐️⭐️⭐️ 3 out of 5 stars

The sleeve reads, "COMFORTING WORDS AND PRACTICAL IDEAS FOR LIVING WITH LOSS. 
Everyone experiences grief differently after the loss of a loved one. Some people find solace in comforting quotes and warm words, while others feel a need to take action - to do something to memorialize their loss. And some benefit from both approaches. Here’s a path forward for you, no matter how you process your grief. 
Your Grief, Your Way features: 
• Multiple ways to process grief: Find relief through short meditations, mindful reframings, journaling prompts, concrete actions, and more.
• A year of daily messages of comfort: Each daily segment includes a quote and a short paragraph about grief along with a practical tip - something you can do to tend to your grief.
• Comfort and practicality in short spurts: Discover strength and support in these bite-size nuggets, since grief reduces the ability to focus.
• Quotes from a wide range of grievers: Take courage from the thoughtful words of people who have been in your shoes.
Whether you’re looking for inspiration, a practical way to honor your loved one, or both, Your Grief, Your Way helps you navigate life after loss."
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Am sure this approach or 'way' is right up the street for many. Was a bit too 'join hands' for me.
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#ShelbyForsythia #YourGriefYourWay #Books #Read #Reads #Reading #Review #Reviews #BookReview #BookReviews #GoodReads #Audiobook #Audiobooks #BorrowBox

[Sal · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is lovely. As someone who is grieving a young adult loved one who died in a sudden and tragic way, as well as the losses of beloved older family members whose deaths were not sudden but nonetheless heartbreaking, I am familiar with the gamut of phases and emotions grieving can manifest in. Grief is hard. It is individual. It is universal. I read a few memoirs around grief in the past year and found them touching but also completely unrelatable - they were someone else's story and grief, not mine. What I wish I had picked up first, and exclusively, is this book. It doesn't preach at me, allowing my own worldview to remain at the center where I prefer it. It doesn't tell me how to grieve, or why I should or shouldn't feel a certain way, or anything else inappropriate. It simply sits with me and gives me permission to think, or to feel, or to cry, or to laugh, or to wonder, or to ache. It is brief and accessible, moving and graceful, without being terse and inadequate.

"With a loved one's death, we step into a liminal space - we've stopped living our old life, but we've not yet stepped into our new one." - from the entry for Feb 22. This book sits with you in this liminal space. I am stepping into my new one, and carrying my grief and my memories and my joy forward. This book gave me space to do exactly that.

Thank you Shelby Forsythia and Zeitgeist for this ARC, but most of all thank you for publishing this needed and sensitive work.

[Erin Book Nerd · Rating 5 out of 5]

I first encountered the author's work with grief via her podcast. Within a few years time, I was reeling on the heels of loss due to the deaths of a best friend, a sibling and my beloved dog. Forsythia's communication style is warm and affirming. I was grateful for the opportunity to read her new book having received an ARC from Netgalley. Their generosity in providing me a copy did not influence my honest review.

The book is formatted into "bite sized" (baby bites,) thoughts presented in a day-of-the-year calendar fashion. This style of communication for grieving works best for me. The subject lends itself better as being read with a slow and steady tortoise pace rather than reading like a racing hare. I only read the September through November entries (and not every day at that,) but the content was excellent. I do not personally know Shelby Forsythia but find her to be a much needed resource for the grieving amongst us in the 21st century. Her writing is such that one feels like she is offering unconditional support and positive regard. There's no wrong way (or right way) to "do grief" but some approaches are more effective and healing than others. I perceive that Ms. Forsythia has both the experience and the training to offer healing and respite to the bereaved. I loved the book. #YourGriefYourWay #NetGalley

[Daman · Rating 4 out of 5]

this book is a great reminder that everyone experiences and processes grief differently, and also offers multiple ways to process grief along with daily messages of comfort, practical helpful tips, and quotes from people who have been in similar situations. this is an excellent resource for people who are trying to navigate the difficult path of grief. whether it is inspiration or a practical way to honor a loved one, or learning how navigate life after loss, this book can offer help. ⁠each day provides compassionate information about a range of topics, including handling friendships, dealing with holidays, physical changes, self care, and returning to life after loss. with its empathetic suggestions, this book provides comfort and a sense of peacefulness to grieving.
⁠

[Erica · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. As someone who has been diagnosed with grief caused depression (with a sprinkle of PTSD in there) there were so many tips in here that helped so much. I read it cover to cover instead of the intended daily entry, but I still found myself so held and comforted by the entries. I highlighted so much of it in my kindle, and plan on purchasing a physical copy to transcribe my notes in.

[Alexis Enterline · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book spoke to me in so many ways. I lost both my parents in the last 6 months and needed a way to help me cope that was not overwhelming. This book was thought provoking and so helpful in dealing with my ongoing grief. So many books are difficult to absorb when you feel so immersed in dealing with a loss. This book provided small bits of helpful information in manageable doses.

[Sheila · Rating 4 out of 5]

I got an advanced copy of Your Grief, Your Way by Shelby Forsythia. After having to back to back deaths of men in my life this month, I thought this book would help me. I love that there is a year of daily messages of comfort, starting in January. Everyone handles grief differently. This book shows the multiple ways to process grief.

[Marilyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've read a lot of books on grief this year and this one is my favorite.
Designed to be read daily during grief, I found myself highlighting much of the author's advice. Passages no where on my radar last year, I found rereading to discover I am not yet 'there' but I am en route on a long journey I never expected to travel.

[Shayna · Rating 5 out of 5]

I bought this book after loosing my dad to COVID. for me, i wanted an easy read and this truly met my expectations. It has helped me connect with some suppressed emotions and has even helped bring back so many happy memories. I am in college as well so finding a book that is easy to read helps ease my mind after school work all day. such a wonderful relatable book💛

[Radwa Hatem · Rating 3 out of 5]

It has some good quotes and journal prompts that could help any recent griever get in touch with their grief and how to handle this new fact of life. I read that to help me with the loss of my mom to cancer last year. Maybe I read it in the wrong way, as much as I could at one sitting, but it still gave me some consoling and ways to honor my mom.

[Regina Cooper · Rating 5 out of 5]

In the months after losing both parents, I found it quite challenging to process such complex grief. This book helped me work through much of what I was feeling by proving me with tips to follow and even words in which I could explain things. I would highly recommend this for anyone walking through the valley of grief and life after loss.

[KFK · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very good daily book to help you go through the 365 days of your grief. Short and sweet ideas, citations, and naming of feelings.

I thought it would have been better to do it from day 1, 2 instead of Jan 1sr, 2nd. But the relationship to dates such as Halloween Christmas, etc. it made sense.

[Eileen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this book to be so helpful when my Mom died. So many of the readings are right on target and very helpful to know that others have felt exactly like you do, that it's normal to feel guilty, that others got through this and so will I.