What do you think?
Rate this book
How to Control your Emotions: Effective Ways to Maintain Your Cool When The Situation Demands It
Have you ever said something hurtful and nasty, then immediately regretted the words? Have you ever reacted intensely to something, and later wished you hadn’t?
How many times during the day do we show our feelings or bare our souls to people, only to be shamed later? All this happens to almost every one of us, every day of our life, all because we don’t know how to control our emotions. Yes, that’s where the problem our emotions!
Our emotions are often so intense and so powerful that we can’t seem to control them. Be it the positive ones like love and happiness, or the hatefully negative ones like anger and contempt, our emotions are better hidden inside us. When we unleash them to the world without a second thought, we might become the reason behind someone’s unhappiness and suffering.
It is extremely important to learn how to control our emotions, all the different kinds we experience and feel every second, every minute, every hour and every day of our lives. Emotions should be controlled and managed, hidden away until we know exactly how to reveal them, and only to the right people.
“How to control your Emotions” isn’t just a book based on researched, but my own journey. After my own life was changed drastically because I couldn’t control my own emotions on a very important day of my life, the idea for this book came to me. I researched it, added my own thoughts and experience to it, to make this book a guideline for all the people who, just like me, has trouble controlling their own emotions when the situation demands it.
How many times during the day do we show our feelings or bare our souls to people, only to be shamed later? All this happens to almost every one of us, every day of our life, all because we don’t know how to control our emotions. Yes, that’s where the problem our emotions!
Our emotions are often so intense and so powerful that we can’t seem to control them. Be it the positive ones like love and happiness, or the hatefully negative ones like anger and contempt, our emotions are better hidden inside us. When we unleash them to the world without a second thought, we might become the reason behind someone’s unhappiness and suffering.
It is extremely important to learn how to control our emotions, all the different kinds we experience and feel every second, every minute, every hour and every day of our lives. Emotions should be controlled and managed, hidden away until we know exactly how to reveal them, and only to the right people.
“How to control your Emotions” isn’t just a book based on researched, but my own journey. After my own life was changed drastically because I couldn’t control my own emotions on a very important day of my life, the idea for this book came to me. I researched it, added my own thoughts and experience to it, to make this book a guideline for all the people who, just like me, has trouble controlling their own emotions when the situation demands it.
- GenresSelf Help
112 pages, Paperback
Published August 8, 2020
95 people are currently reading
56 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
February 4, 2022
It is simply written and structured. Don’t expect some specific research references. There are a couple of good tips on how to manage your emotions (negative and positive). The author reviews emotions like anger, frustration, sadness, anxiety, envy, jealousy. Some of the universal tips are to know what are your triggers for those emotions and to breath deeply. There were also some nice tips and examples. The main inaights for me are:
List your triggers and know what makes you angry. Methods not to get angry:
- Avoid everything that makes you angry (situations, people).
- Stop yourself from getting angry - refuse to get angry. Stop your reactions and control yourself before your anger takes control of you.
- Distract yourself from your trigger. Keep a book, headphones or some entertaining game you like on your phone in order to momentarily switch your thoughts and distract yourself from the trigger. Or you can try to think about something positive and happy - what you will do over the weekend, your next vacation, what you will cook next, etc.
- Leave the situation - if possible leave the location completely. Come back after you have calmed yourself down. This way you can stop yourself from saying something hurtful. You can take a walk outside or a bathroom break to clear your mind.
- Hand it to somebody else - eg hand over the rains to your partner or somebody else. It is better than screaming and yelling at somebody. And take a few minues to calm yourself down.
- Stop listening - most of the time it is someone elses words that makes us angry. Stop listening but also try to pretend you are listening when in truth you are thinking about something else.
- Count backwards and take deep breaths.
- Deal with it later - give yourself the time to think about it and don’t give yourself the time to react. Your initial reactions when angry can be harmful not just for you but for everyone else around you. If you have time to think instead of screaming, you can find solution to your problem. Deal with the situation later when you are rational, calm and not angry anymore.
- Write them down - note down your experiences: what made you angry, how angry you were, how long it took you to get angry and calm down, what you were feeling at that moment, what physical or emotional changes you could see in yourself, what did you do to calm yourself down.
Frustration usually leads to anger or depression. Coping with frustration:
- Know your triggerrs and avoid them. Prepare yourself for the frustration that you will feel. This way you won’t be surprised and the frustration will be milder.
- Try deep breathing exercises. It helps you prepare your mind and body to tackle the frustrating sutuation coming.
- Manage your expectations and don’t put too high and unnatainable goals. Know your limitations.
- Manage your expectations of others. Don’t expect the wrong things from people, eg if somebody is always late, don’t expect them to be on time.
- Manage other people’s expectations of you. Be honest of what you can deliver and talk transparently about it.
- Don’t be a perfectionist.
- Check your reactions and responses. There is a difference between frustration and anger. Frustration is what we feel and anger is what we show the world. If we don’t check ourselves in time, our frustration can turn into rage.
- Don’t think of your frustration as failure. Think of your setbacks as delayed success and not as failure.
- Accept things the way they are - people and circumstances.
Learn to cope with sadness:
- Seek physical comforts and cozyness (like a nap, hot bath or drink, exercise).
- Find support and somebody you can trust and talk to.
- Do something that you enjoy.
- Exercise releases endorphines and that relaxes your mind.
Anxiety is more of a state of being than an actual emotion. Tips on hiding your anxiety emotions:
- Find the causes behind your anxiety (it can be medical or psychological).
- Know yourself well and recognize when you will get anxiety attack (eg signs like sweating, increased heart rate, specific patterns).
- Tackle your visible signs and try not to show them.
- Take a break and use the time to calm yourself down.
- Try deep breathing exercises.
- Try meditation.
- Take time for selfcare and pampering.
- Limit your caffeine and try juices and green tea instead.
- Get enough sleep.
You might be envious of somebody being good at something but remind yourself that nobody is perfect. For the person you are jealous of something, remind yourself of the hundred other things they might be lacking. Everyone has their own faults and limitations and is not the right path to take to envy them.
How to hide resentment, contempt, hatred:
- Try to find the cause of your hatred. Look within yourself and find the underlying reasons behind your negative feelings. Human beings can’t usually accept what others have if they don’t have it themselves.
- Acknowledge your feelings.
- Distinguish between your feelings and don’t mix them up. That would help you bring your emotions under control quicker.
- Write down your feelings. Who or what are inspiring what feelings in you.
- Stop renuminating. Manage your personal thoughts and focus on finding a solution at the problem at hand instead of thinking about what is bothering you.
- Analyze the situation logically. Think of the situation calmly and logically.
- Learn to forget and forgive. Holding a grudge against someone only hurts you.
- Note the positive and redeemable qualities of the person, to whom you have negative feelings.
- Seek professional help.
Challenge your negative thoughts instead of worrying about everything. When you are worried about something, try to think logically instead of panicking.
List your triggers and know what makes you angry. Methods not to get angry:
- Avoid everything that makes you angry (situations, people).
- Stop yourself from getting angry - refuse to get angry. Stop your reactions and control yourself before your anger takes control of you.
- Distract yourself from your trigger. Keep a book, headphones or some entertaining game you like on your phone in order to momentarily switch your thoughts and distract yourself from the trigger. Or you can try to think about something positive and happy - what you will do over the weekend, your next vacation, what you will cook next, etc.
- Leave the situation - if possible leave the location completely. Come back after you have calmed yourself down. This way you can stop yourself from saying something hurtful. You can take a walk outside or a bathroom break to clear your mind.
- Hand it to somebody else - eg hand over the rains to your partner or somebody else. It is better than screaming and yelling at somebody. And take a few minues to calm yourself down.
- Stop listening - most of the time it is someone elses words that makes us angry. Stop listening but also try to pretend you are listening when in truth you are thinking about something else.
- Count backwards and take deep breaths.
- Deal with it later - give yourself the time to think about it and don’t give yourself the time to react. Your initial reactions when angry can be harmful not just for you but for everyone else around you. If you have time to think instead of screaming, you can find solution to your problem. Deal with the situation later when you are rational, calm and not angry anymore.
- Write them down - note down your experiences: what made you angry, how angry you were, how long it took you to get angry and calm down, what you were feeling at that moment, what physical or emotional changes you could see in yourself, what did you do to calm yourself down.
Frustration usually leads to anger or depression. Coping with frustration:
- Know your triggerrs and avoid them. Prepare yourself for the frustration that you will feel. This way you won’t be surprised and the frustration will be milder.
- Try deep breathing exercises. It helps you prepare your mind and body to tackle the frustrating sutuation coming.
- Manage your expectations and don’t put too high and unnatainable goals. Know your limitations.
- Manage your expectations of others. Don’t expect the wrong things from people, eg if somebody is always late, don’t expect them to be on time.
- Manage other people’s expectations of you. Be honest of what you can deliver and talk transparently about it.
- Don’t be a perfectionist.
- Check your reactions and responses. There is a difference between frustration and anger. Frustration is what we feel and anger is what we show the world. If we don’t check ourselves in time, our frustration can turn into rage.
- Don’t think of your frustration as failure. Think of your setbacks as delayed success and not as failure.
- Accept things the way they are - people and circumstances.
Learn to cope with sadness:
- Seek physical comforts and cozyness (like a nap, hot bath or drink, exercise).
- Find support and somebody you can trust and talk to.
- Do something that you enjoy.
- Exercise releases endorphines and that relaxes your mind.
Anxiety is more of a state of being than an actual emotion. Tips on hiding your anxiety emotions:
- Find the causes behind your anxiety (it can be medical or psychological).
- Know yourself well and recognize when you will get anxiety attack (eg signs like sweating, increased heart rate, specific patterns).
- Tackle your visible signs and try not to show them.
- Take a break and use the time to calm yourself down.
- Try deep breathing exercises.
- Try meditation.
- Take time for selfcare and pampering.
- Limit your caffeine and try juices and green tea instead.
- Get enough sleep.
You might be envious of somebody being good at something but remind yourself that nobody is perfect. For the person you are jealous of something, remind yourself of the hundred other things they might be lacking. Everyone has their own faults and limitations and is not the right path to take to envy them.
How to hide resentment, contempt, hatred:
- Try to find the cause of your hatred. Look within yourself and find the underlying reasons behind your negative feelings. Human beings can’t usually accept what others have if they don’t have it themselves.
- Acknowledge your feelings.
- Distinguish between your feelings and don’t mix them up. That would help you bring your emotions under control quicker.
- Write down your feelings. Who or what are inspiring what feelings in you.
- Stop renuminating. Manage your personal thoughts and focus on finding a solution at the problem at hand instead of thinking about what is bothering you.
- Analyze the situation logically. Think of the situation calmly and logically.
- Learn to forget and forgive. Holding a grudge against someone only hurts you.
- Note the positive and redeemable qualities of the person, to whom you have negative feelings.
- Seek professional help.
Challenge your negative thoughts instead of worrying about everything. When you are worried about something, try to think logically instead of panicking.
March 2, 2022
Thumbs Up
It was good.
I liked it. Most of what is there has been fed to me by B.S. authority types my entire life. Mostly, because my fathers family cannibalized a king and where ostracized, and eventually moved to America. So, it is pretty much the same psychobabble that I've been fed since the 80s.
However, I've always had the BEST psychologists in the natiom due to breeding and finances.
I would suggest it to all my friends. Especially right now these days. We are staging a massacre. We are at race war with humanity. I have a nuclear implosive chained to my neck. I was kidnapped 10 years ago. I am not yet home.
Its a thumbs up.
Where are the meds and where is my reward?
It was good.
I liked it. Most of what is there has been fed to me by B.S. authority types my entire life. Mostly, because my fathers family cannibalized a king and where ostracized, and eventually moved to America. So, it is pretty much the same psychobabble that I've been fed since the 80s.
However, I've always had the BEST psychologists in the natiom due to breeding and finances.
I would suggest it to all my friends. Especially right now these days. We are staging a massacre. We are at race war with humanity. I have a nuclear implosive chained to my neck. I was kidnapped 10 years ago. I am not yet home.
Its a thumbs up.
Where are the meds and where is my reward?
February 16, 2022
Sounds like it was written for children. Absurd concepts
"To be accepted by majority of people, a person needs to control and conceal their negative emotions as best as they can. They may have faced a lot of hardships in their life, but it is important to control our negative emotions in order to carry on in society."
This book is not healthy.
"To be accepted by majority of people, a person needs to control and conceal their negative emotions as best as they can. They may have faced a lot of hardships in their life, but it is important to control our negative emotions in order to carry on in society."
This book is not healthy.
April 1, 2022
I needed this book in my life
I absolutely love this book. Being someone who wants to do everything at once, this helped me focus on the task at hand.
Thank you so much for this book!
I absolutely love this book. Being someone who wants to do everything at once, this helped me focus on the task at hand.
Thank you so much for this book!
January 18, 2023
There is literally a grammar mistake on the first page. The sentences are just paraphrased in every possible way. The random fancy words among what looks like a primary school essay do not help at all. Would not recommend ever
January 25, 2022
Not bad, but too general and badly (simply) written. Not my cup of tea, although I did manage to find something useful which I already knew, unfortunately.
January 15, 2023
Thank you
I love this book and enjoyed it , thank you. It is a straight forward book. I am going to apply what I read to my everyday life.
I love this book and enjoyed it , thank you. It is a straight forward book. I am going to apply what I read to my everyday life.
July 18, 2024
Great book,i love it
January 31, 2023
Emotions, part of our day-to-day life
It's a good start in trying to identify and understand your emotiins.
This book give you simple tools to manage your emotions and stay in control when the situation demands it.
It's a good start in trying to identify and understand your emotiins.
This book give you simple tools to manage your emotions and stay in control when the situation demands it.
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews