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Handsome
As a horny little kid, Holly Lorka had no idea why God had put her in the wrong body and made her want to kiss girls. She had questions: Was she a monster? Would she ever be able to grow sideburns? And most importantly, where was her penis?
The problem was, it was the 1970s, so there were no answers yet.
Here, Lorka tells the story—by turns hilarious and poignant—of her romp through the first fifty years of her life searching for sex, love, acceptance, and answers to her questions. With a sharp wit, endearing innocence, and indelible sense of optimism, she struggles through the awkward years (spoiler: that’s all of them) and discovers that what she thought were mistakes are actually powerful tools to launch her into a magical—and ridiculous—life.
Oh, and she discovers that she can buy a penis at the store, too.
The problem was, it was the 1970s, so there were no answers yet.
Here, Lorka tells the story—by turns hilarious and poignant—of her romp through the first fifty years of her life searching for sex, love, acceptance, and answers to her questions. With a sharp wit, endearing innocence, and indelible sense of optimism, she struggles through the awkward years (spoiler: that’s all of them) and discovers that what she thought were mistakes are actually powerful tools to launch her into a magical—and ridiculous—life.
Oh, and she discovers that she can buy a penis at the store, too.
171 pages, Paperback
First published October 20, 2020
12 people are currently reading
198 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 45 reviews
October 16, 2020
3.75 Stars. This was a good memoir. I like to take a break from time to time from my normal reading to pick up something non-fiction. Memoirs especially are my go to when I need to mix things up since they are normally pretty entertaining. And if I can learn a little something too than that is pretty perfect for me. While I studied sociology in college and learned about gender dysmorphia, a lot has changed in sexuality and gender in the 15 years since I was in school. And while popping open a text book might tell you what something means, it doesn’t explain what the person feels. And what better way to truly understand than to read about those feelings from the person that actually has them.
This was a bit different than the normally more linear storylines often seen in a memoir. The book itself was more of a bunch of essays that covered most of Lorka’s life. While I liked the feel of many different stories, so that if one wasn’t that interesting you knew a new one was coming up soon, I did wish the stories didn’t jump around the timeline so much. I didn’t always know which stage this was in Lorka’s life, which city was she living in, and even which girlfriend she was dating because it jumped around so much. Again, the little stories were great I just wished they were in chronological order.
I had a feeling some of the stories might be little tough to read, but when I realized that Lorka was a retired stand-up comedian I was hopeful the book would have a really nice balance to it. I’m happy to say that it did. While I didn’t find it to be overly funny, I found myself laughing out loud more than once. I also found myself tearing up a couple times and I was also embarrassed for Lorka. We all have embarrassing stories but poor Lorka sure has more than her share of them.
I would recommend this to memoir fans and people wanting to know more about what it feels like to be born with the wrong body parts. I don’t know how you could read this and not think that Lorka should have been born differently. A book like this might help educate people who just don’t understand. It is written in a way that is very real and not at all preachy. This was a good debut for Lorka and a good read.
An ARC was given to me for a honest review.
This was a bit different than the normally more linear storylines often seen in a memoir. The book itself was more of a bunch of essays that covered most of Lorka’s life. While I liked the feel of many different stories, so that if one wasn’t that interesting you knew a new one was coming up soon, I did wish the stories didn’t jump around the timeline so much. I didn’t always know which stage this was in Lorka’s life, which city was she living in, and even which girlfriend she was dating because it jumped around so much. Again, the little stories were great I just wished they were in chronological order.
I had a feeling some of the stories might be little tough to read, but when I realized that Lorka was a retired stand-up comedian I was hopeful the book would have a really nice balance to it. I’m happy to say that it did. While I didn’t find it to be overly funny, I found myself laughing out loud more than once. I also found myself tearing up a couple times and I was also embarrassed for Lorka. We all have embarrassing stories but poor Lorka sure has more than her share of them.
I would recommend this to memoir fans and people wanting to know more about what it feels like to be born with the wrong body parts. I don’t know how you could read this and not think that Lorka should have been born differently. A book like this might help educate people who just don’t understand. It is written in a way that is very real and not at all preachy. This was a good debut for Lorka and a good read.
An ARC was given to me for a honest review.
September 22, 2020
4☆ A Honest, Raw, Poignant, Uplifting and inspiring story.
This isn't my normal type of read (memoirs) but I actually really enjoyed it.
It was a very honest, witty, detailed and poignant look into what it was like for Holly, growing up in the wrong body, experimenting, her sexual awakening, and her journey of discovery and acceptance.
Holly made me laugh out loud on so many occasions throughout this book.
I have to warn you this book is sexually explicit in places which some readers may find difficult to read.
My only niggle was at times it felt a little disjointed, but I think that's just because I'm not used to reading this style of book.
But overall Handsome is a heartfelt, inspiring, thought provoking, insightful and very humorous story that certainly opened my eyes.
This isn't my normal type of read (memoirs) but I actually really enjoyed it.
It was a very honest, witty, detailed and poignant look into what it was like for Holly, growing up in the wrong body, experimenting, her sexual awakening, and her journey of discovery and acceptance.
Holly made me laugh out loud on so many occasions throughout this book.
I have to warn you this book is sexually explicit in places which some readers may find difficult to read.
My only niggle was at times it felt a little disjointed, but I think that's just because I'm not used to reading this style of book.
But overall Handsome is a heartfelt, inspiring, thought provoking, insightful and very humorous story that certainly opened my eyes.
October 20, 2020
I read a lot of biographies and autobiographies when I was younger - across a wide range of different topics - but I never really had the opportunity to access many, if any, queer voices. The younger adult me would definitely have appreciated the existence of this book and I definitely appreciated it now - especially as someone who has experienced some similar feelings at times to Lorka.
Lorka covers a number of topics, many in a humorous way, but their exploration of gender and sexuality and their relationship to both are the things that really stands out, and act as the thread for the collection of stories. The topics covered are definitely adult in nature, varying from sex toys to teddy bears and top surgery to life as a nurse. I found some of the stories genuinely heart wrenching, whilst at other times I was laughing out loud.
I can partially understand the decision to mix up the chronological narrative of the chapters, but I needed something to tie things together to make it a little easier to read. If the chapters had all been bunched together in the same general topic I might have found it a bit easier if chronology was to be avoided - but instead I was often left at times wondering where in Lorka’s life this fit, which girlfriend were they dating, where were they living etc. Perhaps in the long run none of things actually mattered, and maybe that was the point, that irrespective of those markers in life, these things still happened, but it’s the lack of chronology or grouping standing between me and a five star rating.
Lorka was definitely an interesting person to spend time learning about, and I’m definitely interested in learning more. If you like memoirs I’d recommend you pick this one up and give it a go.
I received an e-ARC via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Lorka covers a number of topics, many in a humorous way, but their exploration of gender and sexuality and their relationship to both are the things that really stands out, and act as the thread for the collection of stories. The topics covered are definitely adult in nature, varying from sex toys to teddy bears and top surgery to life as a nurse. I found some of the stories genuinely heart wrenching, whilst at other times I was laughing out loud.
I can partially understand the decision to mix up the chronological narrative of the chapters, but I needed something to tie things together to make it a little easier to read. If the chapters had all been bunched together in the same general topic I might have found it a bit easier if chronology was to be avoided - but instead I was often left at times wondering where in Lorka’s life this fit, which girlfriend were they dating, where were they living etc. Perhaps in the long run none of things actually mattered, and maybe that was the point, that irrespective of those markers in life, these things still happened, but it’s the lack of chronology or grouping standing between me and a five star rating.
Lorka was definitely an interesting person to spend time learning about, and I’m definitely interested in learning more. If you like memoirs I’d recommend you pick this one up and give it a go.
I received an e-ARC via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
August 30, 2020
An incredibly funny and heartfelt book that prioritises honesty above everything else, this is a look at growing up queer in an environment where the rules for identity were arbitrary and frustrating, and there was so much to be done in terms of LGBT+ rights. I appreciate that the author doesn't necessarily feel they need to be shoehorned into one particular form of identity, and that the boundaries of queerness are left blurry (as they should be!) in this book. There's a lot of laughs in here as well, and some cringy moments- especially to do with life-size Barbie dolls and bathroom doors. T
This read was a delight, and I'd love to see more from the author as time goes by. There's a wonderful voice here, and things that a lot of queer kids can relate to and appreciate. These sorts of narratives are exactly the kind that I love to see, and they're so important to get out there. I really liked that there weren't arbitrary sections dedicated to growing up in sequential order- jumping around kept it fresh and interesting. The author doesn't shy away from self-deprecation, and their voice is a wonderfully authentic one. Well worth the read- an absolute cracker of an autobiography.
This read was a delight, and I'd love to see more from the author as time goes by. There's a wonderful voice here, and things that a lot of queer kids can relate to and appreciate. These sorts of narratives are exactly the kind that I love to see, and they're so important to get out there. I really liked that there weren't arbitrary sections dedicated to growing up in sequential order- jumping around kept it fresh and interesting. The author doesn't shy away from self-deprecation, and their voice is a wonderfully authentic one. Well worth the read- an absolute cracker of an autobiography.
dnf
April 1, 2021DNF 45% in. I wanted to love this book, to read a memoir about gender, a kid’s development as they began to make choices consistent with their identity and, sure, about sex. But unfortunately the writing wasn’t good, and the sex stories got old after a while. I wish I felt more connected to the author and could keep going, but I just couldn’t persevere.
September 2, 2020
Handsome is a lively collection of essays from Holly Lorka, ranging from incredibly poignant to laugh out loud funny (which is quite the balance to strike!). From an early age, she felt like something was missing- namely a penis. She was attracted to girls, but wanted to be a boy with them. She chronicles her journey to self-acceptance, highlighting relationships and experiences she's had along the way. With essays that can be about a rather serious topic, she will drop a one-liner, that is just perfect and hilarious. I also appreciated her clear enjoyment with being a nurse: how challenging, but rewarding the profession can be. The standout essay of Handsome is a transcript of her talk at Bedpost Confessions where she calls the baggage she carries through her life as loose change- something you would not think about all the time, but it is always there. One can imagine why she received a standing ovation after reading it. Highly recommend this joyous and moving essay collection.
Thank you to NetGalley and She Writes Press for providing me with an advance reader copy for review.
Thank you to NetGalley and She Writes Press for providing me with an advance reader copy for review.
August 29, 2020
First off, thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for this book. While I’m not a part of the LGBTQ community I am an ally, and I love reading books by authors who are. This is no exception, to read the story of Holly, a women trapped in the wrong body and how her life was, the relationship with herself, with her mother and with George Michael. Many won’t understand what it’s like to know you’re in the wrong body the human in you will undoubtedly how compassion for Holly. If you enjoy reading books that might be out of your comfort zone, books by strong, funny LGBTQ authors I definitely reconnect.
August 30, 2020
Disclaimer - This book is geared more toward an older audience. But the topics discussed are the most important thing by far.
Firstly I'm.thankfuk to be able to receive this advanced copy. I love a good memoir especially when they can make me laugh and this one did exactly that. It was like a coaster ride or watching a movie. One moment I was laughing close to tears and next I was crying because of how sad it was. Then next I'm clapping because of the things Holly accomplished. This book shows a understanding of the true self, accepting who you are not what other want you to be. And doing your best at life.
Firstly I'm.thankfuk to be able to receive this advanced copy. I love a good memoir especially when they can make me laugh and this one did exactly that. It was like a coaster ride or watching a movie. One moment I was laughing close to tears and next I was crying because of how sad it was. Then next I'm clapping because of the things Holly accomplished. This book shows a understanding of the true self, accepting who you are not what other want you to be. And doing your best at life.
May 16, 2021
This book had me literally laughing out loud right from the beginning.
Holly Lorka is very blunt, very open and crude as hell - I think we would be great friends in real life!
This book tells the story of her life, as a child that felt as though she was a boy trapped in a Girls body, to accepting she was gay, to then not wanting gender realignment surgery because she had accepted who she was.
It was a real journey, that I thoroughly enjoyed reading about, and thanks to Holly, I feel like I am a pro when it comes to dildos, and i have been educated in what happens EXACTLY in gender reassignment surgery from female to male!!
This book definitely isn't for prides or for people that aren't very open minded, but for everyone else, I highly recommend
Holly Lorka is very blunt, very open and crude as hell - I think we would be great friends in real life!
This book tells the story of her life, as a child that felt as though she was a boy trapped in a Girls body, to accepting she was gay, to then not wanting gender realignment surgery because she had accepted who she was.
It was a real journey, that I thoroughly enjoyed reading about, and thanks to Holly, I feel like I am a pro when it comes to dildos, and i have been educated in what happens EXACTLY in gender reassignment surgery from female to male!!
This book definitely isn't for prides or for people that aren't very open minded, but for everyone else, I highly recommend
September 25, 2020
Thanks to Lorka's memoir, I know now that *at least* four Austinites (including my wife and I) dislike Mumford and Sons. Thank goodness.
Lorka's memoir was very relatable to this queer person. I laughed at the funny parts, gravely contemplated the serious parts, and squirmed uncomfortably at the frank truths within. (Like..."Fourth grade is easy for no one". Being raised Catholic and not understanding why you feel more tender toward girls than boys? So awkward.)
I largely connected with the geographic similarities (Woo, Austin!) between the author and I, as well as Lorka's raw admission of self-hatred and confusion during "2012 Bedpost Confessions". I actually wondered why that story wasn't at the end until I made it to the end. Very powerful.
On a lighter note, who but a Texan (native or transplant) understands how AWFUL it is to have your scooting (or skating) impeded by Texas Live Oak acorns??
Lastly, Lorka's story about the stuffed animal sorta broke my heart in a good way.
This is a beautiful and fulfilling book, one definitely worth reading!
Lorka's memoir was very relatable to this queer person. I laughed at the funny parts, gravely contemplated the serious parts, and squirmed uncomfortably at the frank truths within. (Like..."Fourth grade is easy for no one". Being raised Catholic and not understanding why you feel more tender toward girls than boys? So awkward.)
I largely connected with the geographic similarities (Woo, Austin!) between the author and I, as well as Lorka's raw admission of self-hatred and confusion during "2012 Bedpost Confessions". I actually wondered why that story wasn't at the end until I made it to the end. Very powerful.
On a lighter note, who but a Texan (native or transplant) understands how AWFUL it is to have your scooting (or skating) impeded by Texas Live Oak acorns??
Lastly, Lorka's story about the stuffed animal sorta broke my heart in a good way.
This is a beautiful and fulfilling book, one definitely worth reading!
October 27, 2020
Wow. “Handsome” took me on a roller coaster of emotions. Just as soon as I was laughing my ass off, I went down to a darker place, and then back up again. Author Holly Lorka’s twists and turns were impeccably timed. And she kept me glued to my itty bitty Kindle phone app from start to finish. I couldn’t put it down.
This is a full-on complicated adventure, and I was down for the 3-hour ride.
Nurse by day, comedian by night, Holly’s humorous mini-memoir essays are about all the complicated things in life. She gets real about sex, shame, sadness, feeling “other” and wanting more. And she’ll educate you on what it’s like to grow up with gender dysmorphia. Plus, all of the issues one must face in the quest to become their true selves. It was heartbreaking to witness parts of Holly’s journey, but liberating to read her happy-ever-after ending.
Basically I loved everything about her stories about being an awkward girl boy. I especially love her self-deprecating references about growing up in the 1970s and 80s. She had me rolling on the floor as she was talking about humping her giant Barbie and finding her vagina. Then I felt for her as she was humiliated and bullied on the bus. And then I was shocked a few times and wanted to look away (hello, harvesting eyeballs and buying strap-on black penises).
Speaking of sex toys… This is a fair warning to the prudes and tender-hearted. “Handsome” will make you blush, and it will make you think. If you are uptight or unaccepting in any way, then this is a hard pass.
As you can likely tell, I’m a fan. This is an especially poignant read for the LGBTQI community as well as friends and supporters. If you’re like me and haven’t been exposed to many people who are transgender or who have gender dysmorphia, this is a beautiful, brilliant start.
We are all just wandering around this planet, looking for a way to belong, to fit in. It starts by truly knowing ourselves. And then sharing our deepest secrets, and admitting to others who we really are.
Special thanks to She Writes Press, via NetGalley, for a gifted electronic copy in exchange for my honest review.
This is a full-on complicated adventure, and I was down for the 3-hour ride.
Nurse by day, comedian by night, Holly’s humorous mini-memoir essays are about all the complicated things in life. She gets real about sex, shame, sadness, feeling “other” and wanting more. And she’ll educate you on what it’s like to grow up with gender dysmorphia. Plus, all of the issues one must face in the quest to become their true selves. It was heartbreaking to witness parts of Holly’s journey, but liberating to read her happy-ever-after ending.
Basically I loved everything about her stories about being an awkward girl boy. I especially love her self-deprecating references about growing up in the 1970s and 80s. She had me rolling on the floor as she was talking about humping her giant Barbie and finding her vagina. Then I felt for her as she was humiliated and bullied on the bus. And then I was shocked a few times and wanted to look away (hello, harvesting eyeballs and buying strap-on black penises).
Speaking of sex toys… This is a fair warning to the prudes and tender-hearted. “Handsome” will make you blush, and it will make you think. If you are uptight or unaccepting in any way, then this is a hard pass.
As you can likely tell, I’m a fan. This is an especially poignant read for the LGBTQI community as well as friends and supporters. If you’re like me and haven’t been exposed to many people who are transgender or who have gender dysmorphia, this is a beautiful, brilliant start.
We are all just wandering around this planet, looking for a way to belong, to fit in. It starts by truly knowing ourselves. And then sharing our deepest secrets, and admitting to others who we really are.
Special thanks to She Writes Press, via NetGalley, for a gifted electronic copy in exchange for my honest review.
March 6, 2024
I adore this book’s tone- funny and lighthearted even while delving into deeply personal topics. Highly enjoyable read all the way through.
December 5, 2020
Utterly hilarious, wonderfully personal, and a complete surprise, from the moment I picked up HANDSOME I did not want to put it down. This book had me hysterically laughing from the start, and then getting teary eyed as it progressed. Lorka's ability to share such personal stories is amazingly powerful and really drew me in as a reader. From the awkward moments growing up to adulthood when she was able to love and appreciate all parts of herself, I loved the honesty and openness that Lorka wrote with. This book is a must read for anyone that has struggled with parts of themselves or has ever questioned where they fit in the grand scheme of things. Go get a copy today!
August 18, 2020
"I'd shown these strangers all the scary and shameful parts of me, and they loved me for it."
This book is honest and funny. Holly explains what it's like to grow up in a body that doesn't feel right, and the journey to accepting that body. This book is raw and explains Holly's vulnerability, while also including life experiences that are funny and relatable.
This book made me laugh and cry, which is rare in a book. This book is so important for all people to read and to help them understand others. It is a true glimpse into gender, and so timely in the world we live in.
This book is honest and funny. Holly explains what it's like to grow up in a body that doesn't feel right, and the journey to accepting that body. This book is raw and explains Holly's vulnerability, while also including life experiences that are funny and relatable.
This book made me laugh and cry, which is rare in a book. This book is so important for all people to read and to help them understand others. It is a true glimpse into gender, and so timely in the world we live in.
August 24, 2020
This book is utterly hilarious. Some stories I found myself telling to my LGBTQ friends as we laughed in commiseration. The story of Holly's life, not understanding exactly how she was different from others and then eventually trying to live her truth, is both humorous and deep. This one gets you with laughter and tears, and Lorka's dry wit and sarcasm draw you in to her incredible writing. This is an important and valuable memoir in the vein of Sissy and Fun Home. A wonderful addition to the LGBTQ literature shelf.
August 27, 2020
Thank you #Netgalley for the advanced copy!
Holly Lorka is hilarious as she shared her journey through life being in a women's body but feeling trapped and that she was really meant to be a man. Though when the opportunity presents itself later in life to correct this, she opts not too. As she is the way she is for a reason and has gone through life/experiences that have made her the confident person she is. Loved hearing her childhood stories, the photos, family dynamics and her many interesting relationships and visits to sex shops. So funny and honest!
Holly Lorka is hilarious as she shared her journey through life being in a women's body but feeling trapped and that she was really meant to be a man. Though when the opportunity presents itself later in life to correct this, she opts not too. As she is the way she is for a reason and has gone through life/experiences that have made her the confident person she is. Loved hearing her childhood stories, the photos, family dynamics and her many interesting relationships and visits to sex shops. So funny and honest!
September 26, 2020
I always feel strange rating memoirs or autobiographies because it feels like I’m judging the author’s life. I want to say that this rating is a reflection of my *experience* reading this book and has nothing to do with the author themselves. In fact, I think this was a case of “It’s not you, it’s me” because most of the reviews I see for this book are very highly rated.
I really misunderstood what this book was going to be about. I thought it was going to be a more traditional memoir with a mostly linear storyline and focus more on Holly’s experience with identity. It’s actually a lot of humorous and anecdotal short stories that jump around the timeline. I found this confusing sometimes because I couldn’t tell when certain events happened, like “Was this before or after she moved to Texas? Is this the same girlfriend from before?” I actually don’t mind non-linear storytelling, but I need a frame of reference to know when in time it’s happening. Unfortunately, this was also not my kind of humor. Holly used to be a stand-up comedian, so perhaps hearing some of these stories out loud would have been a different experience.
As an ally to the LGBTQ+ community, I read books to grow my understanding and learn from the experiences of those in the community. I think in this case though, this might be better enjoyed and more relatable to someone in the community.
I received a free copy of this book from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
I really misunderstood what this book was going to be about. I thought it was going to be a more traditional memoir with a mostly linear storyline and focus more on Holly’s experience with identity. It’s actually a lot of humorous and anecdotal short stories that jump around the timeline. I found this confusing sometimes because I couldn’t tell when certain events happened, like “Was this before or after she moved to Texas? Is this the same girlfriend from before?” I actually don’t mind non-linear storytelling, but I need a frame of reference to know when in time it’s happening. Unfortunately, this was also not my kind of humor. Holly used to be a stand-up comedian, so perhaps hearing some of these stories out loud would have been a different experience.
As an ally to the LGBTQ+ community, I read books to grow my understanding and learn from the experiences of those in the community. I think in this case though, this might be better enjoyed and more relatable to someone in the community.
I received a free copy of this book from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
October 15, 2020
Handsome is a memoir by Holly Lorka. It is a collection of essays full of authenticity and raw honesty about growing up in the “wrong body”. I got a digital arc from NetGalley and I have to say it was really clunky. Words out of place, images covered, just not great quality for an ARC. But that was okay, I was still able to get through it with ease.
This memoir is searingly funny, witty, and unfiltered. Holly made me laugh, cry, and cringe equally. A nurse by day, a comedian/writer/storyteller by night, Holly provides a unique perspective I was engrossed in from the start. What a gift to provide such an inside view unto coming to terms with their gender, and sexuality in such a public way. For those of us who grew up cisgendered, this is a story we didn’t live and can only understand when someone bares their soul and story the way Holly did.
Holly is quirky, devilishly funny, and at times a little cringeworthy. But I think that is what makes them so real and readable. I would recommend this to some friends for sure. I will say I did not like what was said about pit bulls, and the part about telling jokes about Mexicans during a stand up act. Those are my only complaints about this book. Otherwise, it was fantastic.
Thank you to NetGalley for the e-arc in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.
This memoir is searingly funny, witty, and unfiltered. Holly made me laugh, cry, and cringe equally. A nurse by day, a comedian/writer/storyteller by night, Holly provides a unique perspective I was engrossed in from the start. What a gift to provide such an inside view unto coming to terms with their gender, and sexuality in such a public way. For those of us who grew up cisgendered, this is a story we didn’t live and can only understand when someone bares their soul and story the way Holly did.
Holly is quirky, devilishly funny, and at times a little cringeworthy. But I think that is what makes them so real and readable. I would recommend this to some friends for sure. I will say I did not like what was said about pit bulls, and the part about telling jokes about Mexicans during a stand up act. Those are my only complaints about this book. Otherwise, it was fantastic.
Thank you to NetGalley for the e-arc in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.
July 14, 2024
This book was recommended to me by someone who has recently started doing some storytelling and who loves reading memoirs.
This book had range- I was laughing, I was uncomfortable, I was crying, I was moved, I was learning. Growing up I have always felt I was a strong ally to my gay and lesbian friends and I hope continue to be as well as advocate for them in the workspace. I feel I still have a lot to learn about gender dysphoria. Not to say “some of my best friend are trans”, but to say, there are multiple trans or gender dysphoric individuals I value, I respect, I love, I want to succeed. I feel like this book helped me better empathize with feeling like you were born the wrong gender.
This was reading a book of someone with a very different life experience than I had, and yet there were times I could see myself or my experience in their story. I hope others with body dysphoria and/or dysmorphia see themselves. I hope other allies read this and if they feel any discomfort, they connect (at a very surface level) to the level of discomfort our trans friends feel, every day.
I’m still learning. I’ll keeping learning. Even if they aren’t my friends, all trans people deserve to be valued for who they are. They belong.
This book had range- I was laughing, I was uncomfortable, I was crying, I was moved, I was learning. Growing up I have always felt I was a strong ally to my gay and lesbian friends and I hope continue to be as well as advocate for them in the workspace. I feel I still have a lot to learn about gender dysphoria. Not to say “some of my best friend are trans”, but to say, there are multiple trans or gender dysphoric individuals I value, I respect, I love, I want to succeed. I feel like this book helped me better empathize with feeling like you were born the wrong gender.
This was reading a book of someone with a very different life experience than I had, and yet there were times I could see myself or my experience in their story. I hope others with body dysphoria and/or dysmorphia see themselves. I hope other allies read this and if they feel any discomfort, they connect (at a very surface level) to the level of discomfort our trans friends feel, every day.
I’m still learning. I’ll keeping learning. Even if they aren’t my friends, all trans people deserve to be valued for who they are. They belong.
October 17, 2020
Thoughts and Themes: I really enjoy reading memoirs and especially LGBTQ+ memoirs because I get to see different people’s lived experience. I like seeing that there are people with similar identities to me but they come to that conclusion differently and they all have a different way of viewing themselves.
There were so many times in this story that I was laughing out loud because of something said of because of the cleaver titles of the chapters. I do need to let you all know that this book is sexually explicit which some may find hard to read. I found those moments funny and liked to see how those moments helped Holly figure out her sexuality and gender identity.
I really enjoyed the honesty that you get from Holly throughout this book and how vulnerable the author is in these moments. I think that getting a chance to read these essays/short stories really gives you another perspective on who the author is. I would love to hear some of these pieces on audio because I think that they would be even better heard out loud.
Writing Style: This memoir is told through multiple short essays that have some humor mixed into each chapter. I really liked the variation in length of each of these short essays and how they are not always in chronological order. I liked that sometimes the essays went back in time to connect some of Holly’s past to her present.
There were so many times in this story that I was laughing out loud because of something said of because of the cleaver titles of the chapters. I do need to let you all know that this book is sexually explicit which some may find hard to read. I found those moments funny and liked to see how those moments helped Holly figure out her sexuality and gender identity.
I really enjoyed the honesty that you get from Holly throughout this book and how vulnerable the author is in these moments. I think that getting a chance to read these essays/short stories really gives you another perspective on who the author is. I would love to hear some of these pieces on audio because I think that they would be even better heard out loud.
Writing Style: This memoir is told through multiple short essays that have some humor mixed into each chapter. I really liked the variation in length of each of these short essays and how they are not always in chronological order. I liked that sometimes the essays went back in time to connect some of Holly’s past to her present.
October 20, 2020
HANDSOME is an autobiographical collection of short stories and essays where the author recounts growing up queer in a time when societal standards didn’t allow for any sexuality or gender identity outside of “normal”. ⠀
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From childhood and questioning her gender to the teen years and beyond, this is a book of sexual questioning, exploration, and ultimately finding your true identity. Filled with humor and wit, there are plenty of laugh out loud moments, but beware! there are certainly some raunchy stories within, though you can probably parse that straight from the synopsis 😉 ⠀
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All told, HANDSOME was a quick and humorous memoir that explores sexuality and identity, and I certainly hope Lorka brings us more in the future.
*I received a free review copy courtesy of BookSparks and She Writes Press.
⠀
From childhood and questioning her gender to the teen years and beyond, this is a book of sexual questioning, exploration, and ultimately finding your true identity. Filled with humor and wit, there are plenty of laugh out loud moments, but beware! there are certainly some raunchy stories within, though you can probably parse that straight from the synopsis 😉 ⠀
⠀
All told, HANDSOME was a quick and humorous memoir that explores sexuality and identity, and I certainly hope Lorka brings us more in the future.
*I received a free review copy courtesy of BookSparks and She Writes Press.
October 21, 2020
Handsome is a memoir told in a series of essays about life and love when you are a boy in a girl’s body. During the course of this book you will laugh until you cry, you will sad cry and will learn to appreciate and accept what goes on with someone when what is on the outside and how they feel on the inside don’t match.
Some essays do have spicy (not the food variety) content.
My top three favorite essays from this book:
1. a legend on my own bus- Holly talks about desperately wanting a nickname (this is a laugh til you cry one)
2. what I didn’t consider when I went to nursing school- a story about a patient of Holly’s (get your tissues on stand by)
3. following your dreams while avoiding acorns- a dead mom, a broken leg and a kick in the pants to start writing this memoir
Some essays do have spicy (not the food variety) content.
My top three favorite essays from this book:
1. a legend on my own bus- Holly talks about desperately wanting a nickname (this is a laugh til you cry one)
2. what I didn’t consider when I went to nursing school- a story about a patient of Holly’s (get your tissues on stand by)
3. following your dreams while avoiding acorns- a dead mom, a broken leg and a kick in the pants to start writing this memoir
November 29, 2020
Holly Lorka has done an amazing job with this book and it is one of my favourites of the year and one I already can’t wait to return too. It is a honest and raw look at the discovery of yourself and sexuality. A look at the way in which define ourselves and how our choices make and define us. There some very funny moments where I actually laughed out loud and tender moments that made me cry. Hearing of Holly speak of her time nursing is one of those moments and really add heart to the book.
A great book that I would recommend to all.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for a cope of this book I exchange for an honest review.
A great book that I would recommend to all.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for a cope of this book I exchange for an honest review.
September 26, 2020
This was an incredibly honest; beautiful; funny; and wonderfully raw read!
In "Handsome", Holly Lorka tells the story of finding herself and her sexual identity using a great mix of humor and honesty. I'm in awe of her amazing spirit - and I really hope there's a second book in her future!
The only tiny complaint that I have any this book is that the chapters/tales are rather short - and while this seemed to be Lorka's style, it left me wanting to know so much more!
Thank you to Netgalley; the publisher; and to Holly Lorka herself for giving me the chance to enjoy this one!
In "Handsome", Holly Lorka tells the story of finding herself and her sexual identity using a great mix of humor and honesty. I'm in awe of her amazing spirit - and I really hope there's a second book in her future!
The only tiny complaint that I have any this book is that the chapters/tales are rather short - and while this seemed to be Lorka's style, it left me wanting to know so much more!
Thank you to Netgalley; the publisher; and to Holly Lorka herself for giving me the chance to enjoy this one!
October 17, 2020
Thanks to Booksparks for sending me an advanced copy to read.
“As a horny little kid, Holly Lorka had no idea why God had put her in the wrong body and made her want to kiss girls. She had questions: Was she a monster? Would she ever be able to grow sideburns? And most importantly, where was her penis?”
Funny, poignant, awkward and entertaining. Holly Lorka takes you through childhood into life in her 40's as she discovers who she is and what she wants out of life. Holly's stories are fun to read as her honest and frank style of storytelling invites you into her world.
“As a horny little kid, Holly Lorka had no idea why God had put her in the wrong body and made her want to kiss girls. She had questions: Was she a monster? Would she ever be able to grow sideburns? And most importantly, where was her penis?”
Funny, poignant, awkward and entertaining. Holly Lorka takes you through childhood into life in her 40's as she discovers who she is and what she wants out of life. Holly's stories are fun to read as her honest and frank style of storytelling invites you into her world.
October 21, 2020
This was written in essay form, and I think it was the perfect way to write these thoughts and stories. Holly shared her life in the most unfiltered, hilarious, and truthful manner, and it is brilliant. I laughed and cried as her story unveiled, and honestly, this is the most memorable memoir I have ever read for 2020. Thank you so much for sharing this with us; many will relate to her ups and downs and her journey towards self-acceptance. If you’re into inspiring read with tons of lessons to learn, this book is for you.
September 9, 2020
Written with such humour but recounting such obvious difficult times for anyone for any age to deal with. Holly/Steve navigates through childhood and beyond with no real certainty of where she stands in life! A really interesting read and an insight into something I would have never otherwise even began to understood.
"Is a caterpillar something that has to change to become a butterfly? Or is a caterpillar aways a butterfly that just hasn't grown into it yet"
"Is a caterpillar something that has to change to become a butterfly? Or is a caterpillar aways a butterfly that just hasn't grown into it yet"
January 16, 2021
This was a quirky collection of stories that had no real coherence. The stories ranged from very very sad to pretty funny. I wish this book had more of a narrative arc instead of jumping in different parts of the author's life. I did like her writing style and would recommend this book to fans of Laurie Notaro.
February 1, 2021
Holly Lorka’s funny, irreverent and poignant collection of essays about learning to love oneself is not to be missed. Although the book’s subtitle reads “stories of an awkward, girl, boy, human,” there’s nothing awkward about the writing. Lorka is a great storyteller, the kind you’d like to have as a next door neighbor. I hope there’s a sequel.
March 28, 2024
3.5 stars. This memoir is structured in short personal essays that jump around a timeline from childhood to present. Some are funny, some are deep, and some seem to not quite fit (job as eye harvester for transplants). I appreciated the author’s honesty sharing how she experiences gender and sexuality.
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