Embracing Prodigals: Overcoming Authoritative Religion by Embodying Jesus' Nurturing Grace

by John Sanders

Do you wonder why some people you know hold theological and political views that blow your mind but they find quite reasonable? Today, Christians are at odds over how to understand the Bible, atonement, and salvation of non-Christians. They are also polarized over issues such as same-gender marriage, income inequality, and health care. Two social science models, Nurturant and Authoritative, explain this divide. Values are at the heart of our disagreements. Nurturants prize empathy and cooperation while Authoritatives cherish obedience to law and order. Each group has distinct core values and these lead them to embrace different theological, moral, and political views. This book explains the divide and makes the case that Jesus embodied the Nurturant way of life. He modeled empathy, grace, forgiveness, and care for those beyond his own tribe. The Nurturant and Authoritative approaches have competed for thousands of years but contemporary research shows that the Nurturant way of life produces better mental and spiritual health as well as superior communities in which to live.

Genres: Theology

154 pages, Paperback

Published July 31, 2020

Reviews

[Steve Irby · Rating 5 out of 5]

Quarantine-Book #36:

I just finished "Embracing Prodigals: Overcoming Authoritative Religion by Embodying Jesus' Nurturing Grace," by John Sanders.

Sanders lays out two false narratives based on the prodigal son. The one we are most familiar is the Authoritative parent who makes the son earn his way back into the father's good graces. The other is the permissive parent who is always affirming everything the son did with no moral evaluation. We are often Authoritative while seeing God as permissive. When we see how Jesus tells this story we notice it doesn't fit either of the above; his approach is always a Nurturant approach.

According to Sanders the Authoritative and Nurturant are common Biblical approaches which also have much modern research behind them. Jesus' own approach was Nurturing, and even when faced with Authoritative scriptural objections Jesus would turn them Nurturant.

"[T]hose with Nurturing values see the Christian life as a pilgrimage and think that there are usually several good views on a particular Doctrine," p xvi. This is one of the attributes of Dr. Sanders I most appreciate: he tells the opposing view that yes, theirs has reasonable evidence for them to hold that view (Perspectives: The Doctrine of God) or that we should have "epistemic humility" (Theology in the Flesh).

Sanders tries to show how each side can't understand the other because of their categorys' prototypes. While this is a summary of work done in his Theology in the Flesh it is appropriate here. He also shows how we have a disposition towards a model of God that reflects us: Authoritative or Nurturant.

Sanders moves into speaking about Jesus and how He is what God is really like. His acceptance and love of all unconditionally is what raised the disdain of the orthodox.

"Divine acceptance motivates us to adopt God's values. God becomes the exemplar whom we imitate in our lives," p 30.

He then gives a glimpse into a later chapter on scripture that shows the trend in scripture grows to a more Nurturant location than to an Authoritative one until we land at Jesus.

"God approves of those who wrestle with God," p 33. God is open to our questions and comments so much that some three dozen places in scripture record him changing his mind in response to interaction with his children.

The difference between Authoritative and Nurturant models of God are precisely reflected in "God is watching you," (p 39) and "God is watching out for you," (p39).

I believe it was Dr Sanders in his "Atonement and Violence" who gave me "One emulates the model of God one serves," to paraphrase. With that in mind there should be some mental health data for persons who hold a Authoritative-- and a Nurturant model of God. There is and it is amazing. Theology impacts how we live in a profound sense.

"Those who are more fearful of God have less humility and hold their beliefs more rigidly. [...] They often wait for God to solve problems for them so they feel less in control and they have poorer problem-solving skills. [...] Those who believe God is judgemental exhibit significantly more social anxiety, paranoia, and compulsions," pp 43-44.[Heavily footnoted.]

Sanders is putting into words what I haven't been able to find the exasperated language for beyond" psychologically we deviate one way or another theologically because that's what we need to get out of bed in the morning." Sander states: "I used to wonder why the same people blasted each book I wrote. It did not matter what the topic was, they threw scathing remarks my way. I now realize that I produced Nurturing theology while they defended Authoritative theology," p 49.

This truncated focus of Authoritative theology allows but a narrow application of metaphors to concepts like sin, grace, Atonement, eucharist, baptism, pluralism, salvation and hell. Scripture, on the other hand, bends over backwards with tons of metaphors to appeal to the broadest audiences with the Nurturing message of liberation that comes from King Jesus alone. Sanders spends a chapter with limited metaphors VS the broadly Biblical metaphors of the theological concepts listed above showing how the values that are Authoritative state their theology verses how values that are Nurturant state theirs.

Sanders moves on to the Bible.

"In the Old Testament the 'word' was the path to follow. The Gospel of John says Jesus is the Word of God who reveals what God is like and shows us the path to walk," p 68.

Here he lays out how the ignorant Pharisaism of adhering to wooden literalism of a "clear Biblical teaching" can't be had. Using a quick dose of metaphor Sanders points out that very little is truly literal. Then he exposes how not even Jesus and the apostolic writers did that.

"Authoritatives tend to allow no room between what they believe on a particular teaching and what God thinks. That means that when you question their view, you are questioning God," p 90.

Profound. This was prefaced with the thought that for our salvific stability we have to think we are correct therefore we treat new information as wrong and won't think about it [paraphrase mine].

Your kudzu analogy is profound, Doc.

"Jesus teaches that we need to get over our tribalism and stereotypes of other religious groups," p 104.

The rest of the book? - - buy it.

This is an awesome work for dealing with and understanding voluntary interpersonal interaction and relationships.

#EmbracingProdigals #JohnSanders #NurturingTheology #OpenTheism #OpenAndRelationalTheology #FeministTheology #ChristusVictor #MoralInfluence #Scapegoat

[Steve Watson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Social scientists have identified different styles of parenting - authoritative, permissive, and nurturing. Sanders have noticed that two of these map well to different ways that Christians envision God, as more authoritative or nurturing. These theologies influence our parenting but also our politics, our Bible reading, our relationships, and even ourselves.

Nurturing views of God are consonant with the story of the prodigal son Jesus tells as well as with the teaching of Jesus as a whole. God's primary attribute is love, which includes forgiveness, grace, mercy, and acceptance. Rules exist for the sake of healthy relationships, both human and divine. Nurturing views of God believe God responds to sin with grace, which lead to an emphasis on nonviolent atonement theories and belief in a smaller hell or no hell.

Authoritative views of God don't sit well with the father of the story of the prodigal son. Authoritative religion centers God's power, believes God is in control of all things and most importantly requires obedience. Rules exist to be followed. Authoritative views of God believe God responds to sin with wrath and punishment, which lends an emphasis on penal atonement theory and hell.

The Old Testament, and the whole of the Christian scriptures, contain both authoritative and nurturing descriptions of and stories about God. But Jesus almost exclusively references and affirms the nurturing view. At other times, the scriptures are self-correcting, re-presenting authoritative teaching through a nurturing lens.

Believers in the authoritative God are often loyal and optimistic about the future. They are often scrupulous about certain ethics, such as cheating, and resist changes to the social order, unless it is to return it to a real or imagined better order of the past. They are also less concerned for others who are different, less tolerant of difference, more fearful of God, more anxious, and less humble. "The quality of relationships with others is not as strong and they have lower degrees of attachment." (43)

Believers in the nurturing God are "more cooperative, agreeable, and have better social relationships." They volunteer to help others more, treat those who are different better, are more humble and less dogmatic, and live with greater meaning and purpose. They feel more secure in God's love and so "have greater life satisfaction and less loneliness." (43)

Sanders argues clearly and persuasively for the superiority of nurturing theology, religion, parenting, and life. As he does so, he is gentle, irenic, and humble, modeling the character and style of thinking and relating of which he speaks. This is a beautiful and helpful little book.

[Michael Austin · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a very helpful look at the values that really divide many of us, and how they relate to the Bible, our views of God, how we think about politics, morality, and religion more generally. A valuable read for anyone wanting to think about these topics in more depth and detail.

[Bryan · Rating 5 out of 5]

John Sanders has winsomely presented a timely call for humility toward oneself and charity toward others rather than shoring up religious tribalism through the zero-sum game of "authoritative religion." The reader may not agree with all of Sander's conclusions, but the point is that there is and always has been diversity in the "big tent" of Christian faith. One of the best points Sanders makes is in regard to the fact that the early church, following Jesus, had to "re-adjust" itself in relation to much that was in the OT Scriptures, simply because humility and charity required it, not to mention the Spirit of Christ. This book should be extremely helpful to those ready to abandon all "Evangelical" faith, since there is no one minutely defined Evangelical faith. The book is also helpful for its foray into political division which reveals how much nurturant versus authoritative religion determines political attitudes, beliefs, and practices. Sanders covers much ground in this slim volume, and does so very clearly and interestingly. In this reviewer's opinion, the book well-serves the gospel of Christ and all of humanity it is meant for, providing the appeal of God's nurturant light, as opposed to the coercion of what is too-often man's authoritative heat.

[Jason Koon · Rating 3 out of 5]

Had some good ideas but reductionistic. Some good insights on the difference between authoritative and nurturing religion, but was surprisingly uncharitable toward his opponents considering the book was arguing for understanding and openness.