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Children Who Are Not Yet Peaceful: Preventing Exclusion in the Early Elementary Classroom
Charting the progress of twelve children in a real Texas classroom, educator Donna Goertz shows how positive change can occur given the proper environment. In each case she describes a child's transformation from destructive troublemaker to responsible citizen of the classroom community. Readers will learn how to apply Montessori methods to virtually any early elementary environment.
250 pages, Paperback
First published November 30, 2000
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268 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews
September 5, 2018
Love the storytelling and beautiful use of language. Very real stories that help one visualize multiple ways to approach a scenario. My concern, as with all fundamentalist-style books, is the persistent "othering" of traditional education, teachers, and parents as a straw man in each moral. This sentiment grows stronger as the book progresses, and unfortunately concludes on this "Montessori first and only" tone which I found ironic. For a book about creating an inclusive space, it is remarkably narrow in its vision of the variety of successful methods to develop peaceful, collaborative and loving relationships for children and families. Stay focused on the value of the vignettes, and you will be well served by a skilled mentor and generous teacher. My editor hat would like to cut or tone down rhetoric, especially because I think there are lessons here that can adapted to a wide variety of settings with a little imagination. Definitely engrossing and worth the read.
June 19, 2022
My problem with this book isn’t that she is so against traditional education, my problem is all of her other hot takes. Medication, early intervention, therapy, other parenting techniques that don’t Montessori,and yes 5”traditional public schooling all have their place. Just because those things aren’t inherently “Montessori” doesn’t make them wrong.
There were some aspects of her book and techniques that were solid, approaches, but they were mostly clouded by the extreme. In the first chapter, for example she has the children help another child clean up her urine. In what world?!
I have lots of other thoughts on this book, but that’s it for now.
There were some aspects of her book and techniques that were solid, approaches, but they were mostly clouded by the extreme. In the first chapter, for example she has the children help another child clean up her urine. In what world?!
I have lots of other thoughts on this book, but that’s it for now.
January 9, 2016
I keep coming back to this book as an example of what I would love to see in our child's Montessori school experience.
January 9, 2009
In a Montessori classroom "the scope of the materials is broad, but the content is limited , focused, and open-ended, leading the children to go beyond them to library and the larger community" (4).
Csikszentmihalyi calls "regular, deep, and lengthy engagement 'flow.' It is time spent daily in this state from which emotional and intellectual development springs. While in a state of flow . . . concentration is so intense that there is not attention left over to think about anything irrelevant, or to worry about problems. Self-consciousness disappears, and the sense of time becomes distorted. An activity that produces such experiences is so gratifying that people are willing to do it for its own sake, with little concern for what they get out of it . . . every flow activity . . . provided a sense of discovery, a creative feeling of transporting the person into a new reality. It pushed the person to higher levels of performance, and lead to previously undreamed-of states of consciousness. In short, it transformed the self by making it more complex. In this growth of the self lies the key to flow activities" (4).
"Deep down, each child knows he is only as worthy as any other child. Casting some children in negative roles puts the very being of each and every child at risk. If even one child can be cast aside as unworthy, no child is truly safe. He feels keenly insecure at the ground of his being" (11).
" . . . the lesson she teaches is either that children can learn the skills to work out their issues among themselves with respect, fairness, and care or that children must be controlled by an adult. The first lesson is authoritative and hopeful; the second is authoritarian and cynical" (11).
"It is an unhealthy burden for a child to be 'bad' or 'good.' We must relieve every child of that burden and allow all of them to be works of art in progress" (11).
"Now medicating is the new quick fix [which doesn't:] teach faith, hope, love, respect, or peace. [It doesn't show:] the child how to control anger, get along with others, or love her or himself. . . What we forfeit by medicating a child is value and ownership of her own freedom, will, choice, self-discipline, and effort. Instead of collaborating with her on a problem, we step in and do things to her, or use medication to mask her struggle. How are we to assist those children who seem lost? Each child is different. We must search for the particular key that this child is able to use and find the right manner and the right moment for presenting it to her" (16).
Give the child the key, but do not open the door for her otherwise you encourage the child to become helpless and teach her that she must be taught by others (15-16).
"I have come to expect a passion to develop and trigger the concentration essential to every child's healing and growth. . . . This is how children manage to overcome the deviations that have occurred in their development when their environment has clashed with their authentic needs" (31-32).
"In the classroom the Montessori teacher is the keeper of the constitution . . . Our constitution covers both a set of ultimate values and principles and the general manner in which they are expressed. The teacher is the lantern lighting the way, and the children are the seekers, each finding his or her own path. They apply the principles and uphold the values, struggling with variations and permutations of daily issues and situations" (32).
"Before you catch that spider, stop and find your respect for the other children" (32).
"We search for the first incidence of concentration, support it, expand it, and transfer it to the entire curriculum" (44).
"I have learned that it is important not to look too often or know too much. In a rich environment with a dynamic community life, what might elsewhere be labeled neglect is the magnetic field of spontaneous activity. Giving plenty of presentations to small groups of children in all curriculum areas for their stimulation in selecting their daily work is basic. So is ample and skillful observation. But just as basic is remembering that watching too closely and too obviously can inhibit spontaneous activity or even bring it to a halt. The children need to feel secure in the teacher's trust that they are naturally eager learners and hard workers" (44-45).
"His words were uttered spontaneously from such depth of feeling. They tapped an energy source that could fuel a long, hard journey" (45).
"We choreograph our lives in relations to our issues, first from one direction and then from another. We move at new angles and invent new steps, but our issues are always with us, familiar themes for the dance of our lives" (51).
"Since the children are accustomed to my refusal to label or to accept labels for them, the almost intuitively join me in magnanimous and expansive acceptance, creating unprecedented new ways of accommodating individuality" (53).
" . . . customary classroom decorum . . . requires the establishment of proximity before speaking" (57)
"I wait until a child has been with us a while before speaking of him before the entire group. By that time he has reached an appropriate comfort level and has heard me speak of others in a similar way. It is far kinder of me to speak openly of a child's behavior than for the other children to speak of it behind my back" (60).
"In the Four Planes of Education, Maria Montessori called this healing process normalization on the first plane of development. Through deep concentration in their chosen work, children can reclaim their authentic self and return to the healthy expression of their own temperament. They begin to respond to possibilities out of their own desire, not because they are compelled by authorities. Before this concentration seems even remotely possible, however, for some there is a time of waiting, in which the teacher is searching for the key to the the turning point for these children. During this time the teacher and community of children rally supportively around those children, creating a buoyant ambiance of hope and courage" (62).
"Some children can respond comfortably while others are watching, some require a watchful eye, but others . . . need a few minutes off stage to change their costumes and make an entrance after the scenery has changed. Obedience is so important a life skill that we teachers study a child's learning style and rate carefully to know how best to support its development" (78).
"A great challenge to any teacher is to distinguish between behavior that can and must be stopped on the spot, behavior that requires a sure response that takes the child the first step toward outgrowing it, and behavior that is best ignored until later. Not every behavior can be dealt with at once. Our children need strong, flexible, authoritative, and patient teachers--neither permissive nor authoritarian--for sure progress in their learning and behavior" (79).
"At times like these I speak in the third person of a child who has not become assimilated into the community, or who has chosen a role that doesn't benefit him or the class. I work gradually toward getting the children ready to communicate directly to one another. I have found that direct address can be harsher than the third person and too strong for a struggling child to bear in the beginning. Third-person discussion allows a child to stand aside and listen to both the anger and the love coming his way. It allows him to look at himself through the eyes of others without bearing the brunt of direct confrontation. My use of the third person slows down the process and makes time to introduce sensitive reflection on motives and needs, responses and remedies" (98).
"When few words must be used to describe a child, it is always best to use a changing variety of colorful and widely applied adjectives . . . . This way of speaking is only false and euphemistic if it is used to mask the speaker's deeply held prejudices. It is the school's responsibility to help parents see their children through the 'eyes of delight' and love" (118).
"I was glad I hadn't been aware of this development, or I might have weakened and interfered with his momentum by attempting to direct him to seek balance in his work. Now that Edmund had established a long habit of self-directed work and had become addicted to the satisfactions of inner motivation, I could dare to interfere aggressively without the risk of losing valuable ground. The indulgence of generous time had paid off. . . . By spending time then, we were saving time now" (133).
"Knowing when to push and when to back off, having a variety of approaches and the flexibility to shift among them, and feeling genuine and deep affection for each child as he or she is at a given moment are basic requirements for adults who aspire to assist children in their dynamic self-development" (137).
"Yet, all too often extra time in the early elementary classroom is withheld from children smugly, fearfully, or thoughtlessly. Smugly assuming that every child ought to progress through a level in three years . .. . Fearful of having our competence or the child's ability assessed harshly . . . . Thoughtlessly we allow current trends to dictate timetables and remedies" (137).
"The extra year is an ordinary idea in my classroom. We call it reaching full cycle. It can take three years or it can take four. The children seem to sort themselves out naturally and pleasantly" (137).
Csikszentmihalyi calls "regular, deep, and lengthy engagement 'flow.' It is time spent daily in this state from which emotional and intellectual development springs. While in a state of flow . . . concentration is so intense that there is not attention left over to think about anything irrelevant, or to worry about problems. Self-consciousness disappears, and the sense of time becomes distorted. An activity that produces such experiences is so gratifying that people are willing to do it for its own sake, with little concern for what they get out of it . . . every flow activity . . . provided a sense of discovery, a creative feeling of transporting the person into a new reality. It pushed the person to higher levels of performance, and lead to previously undreamed-of states of consciousness. In short, it transformed the self by making it more complex. In this growth of the self lies the key to flow activities" (4).
"Deep down, each child knows he is only as worthy as any other child. Casting some children in negative roles puts the very being of each and every child at risk. If even one child can be cast aside as unworthy, no child is truly safe. He feels keenly insecure at the ground of his being" (11).
" . . . the lesson she teaches is either that children can learn the skills to work out their issues among themselves with respect, fairness, and care or that children must be controlled by an adult. The first lesson is authoritative and hopeful; the second is authoritarian and cynical" (11).
"It is an unhealthy burden for a child to be 'bad' or 'good.' We must relieve every child of that burden and allow all of them to be works of art in progress" (11).
"Now medicating is the new quick fix [which doesn't:] teach faith, hope, love, respect, or peace. [It doesn't show:] the child how to control anger, get along with others, or love her or himself. . . What we forfeit by medicating a child is value and ownership of her own freedom, will, choice, self-discipline, and effort. Instead of collaborating with her on a problem, we step in and do things to her, or use medication to mask her struggle. How are we to assist those children who seem lost? Each child is different. We must search for the particular key that this child is able to use and find the right manner and the right moment for presenting it to her" (16).
Give the child the key, but do not open the door for her otherwise you encourage the child to become helpless and teach her that she must be taught by others (15-16).
"I have come to expect a passion to develop and trigger the concentration essential to every child's healing and growth. . . . This is how children manage to overcome the deviations that have occurred in their development when their environment has clashed with their authentic needs" (31-32).
"In the classroom the Montessori teacher is the keeper of the constitution . . . Our constitution covers both a set of ultimate values and principles and the general manner in which they are expressed. The teacher is the lantern lighting the way, and the children are the seekers, each finding his or her own path. They apply the principles and uphold the values, struggling with variations and permutations of daily issues and situations" (32).
"Before you catch that spider, stop and find your respect for the other children" (32).
"We search for the first incidence of concentration, support it, expand it, and transfer it to the entire curriculum" (44).
"I have learned that it is important not to look too often or know too much. In a rich environment with a dynamic community life, what might elsewhere be labeled neglect is the magnetic field of spontaneous activity. Giving plenty of presentations to small groups of children in all curriculum areas for their stimulation in selecting their daily work is basic. So is ample and skillful observation. But just as basic is remembering that watching too closely and too obviously can inhibit spontaneous activity or even bring it to a halt. The children need to feel secure in the teacher's trust that they are naturally eager learners and hard workers" (44-45).
"His words were uttered spontaneously from such depth of feeling. They tapped an energy source that could fuel a long, hard journey" (45).
"We choreograph our lives in relations to our issues, first from one direction and then from another. We move at new angles and invent new steps, but our issues are always with us, familiar themes for the dance of our lives" (51).
"Since the children are accustomed to my refusal to label or to accept labels for them, the almost intuitively join me in magnanimous and expansive acceptance, creating unprecedented new ways of accommodating individuality" (53).
" . . . customary classroom decorum . . . requires the establishment of proximity before speaking" (57)
"I wait until a child has been with us a while before speaking of him before the entire group. By that time he has reached an appropriate comfort level and has heard me speak of others in a similar way. It is far kinder of me to speak openly of a child's behavior than for the other children to speak of it behind my back" (60).
"In the Four Planes of Education, Maria Montessori called this healing process normalization on the first plane of development. Through deep concentration in their chosen work, children can reclaim their authentic self and return to the healthy expression of their own temperament. They begin to respond to possibilities out of their own desire, not because they are compelled by authorities. Before this concentration seems even remotely possible, however, for some there is a time of waiting, in which the teacher is searching for the key to the the turning point for these children. During this time the teacher and community of children rally supportively around those children, creating a buoyant ambiance of hope and courage" (62).
"Some children can respond comfortably while others are watching, some require a watchful eye, but others . . . need a few minutes off stage to change their costumes and make an entrance after the scenery has changed. Obedience is so important a life skill that we teachers study a child's learning style and rate carefully to know how best to support its development" (78).
"A great challenge to any teacher is to distinguish between behavior that can and must be stopped on the spot, behavior that requires a sure response that takes the child the first step toward outgrowing it, and behavior that is best ignored until later. Not every behavior can be dealt with at once. Our children need strong, flexible, authoritative, and patient teachers--neither permissive nor authoritarian--for sure progress in their learning and behavior" (79).
"At times like these I speak in the third person of a child who has not become assimilated into the community, or who has chosen a role that doesn't benefit him or the class. I work gradually toward getting the children ready to communicate directly to one another. I have found that direct address can be harsher than the third person and too strong for a struggling child to bear in the beginning. Third-person discussion allows a child to stand aside and listen to both the anger and the love coming his way. It allows him to look at himself through the eyes of others without bearing the brunt of direct confrontation. My use of the third person slows down the process and makes time to introduce sensitive reflection on motives and needs, responses and remedies" (98).
"When few words must be used to describe a child, it is always best to use a changing variety of colorful and widely applied adjectives . . . . This way of speaking is only false and euphemistic if it is used to mask the speaker's deeply held prejudices. It is the school's responsibility to help parents see their children through the 'eyes of delight' and love" (118).
"I was glad I hadn't been aware of this development, or I might have weakened and interfered with his momentum by attempting to direct him to seek balance in his work. Now that Edmund had established a long habit of self-directed work and had become addicted to the satisfactions of inner motivation, I could dare to interfere aggressively without the risk of losing valuable ground. The indulgence of generous time had paid off. . . . By spending time then, we were saving time now" (133).
"Knowing when to push and when to back off, having a variety of approaches and the flexibility to shift among them, and feeling genuine and deep affection for each child as he or she is at a given moment are basic requirements for adults who aspire to assist children in their dynamic self-development" (137).
"Yet, all too often extra time in the early elementary classroom is withheld from children smugly, fearfully, or thoughtlessly. Smugly assuming that every child ought to progress through a level in three years . .. . Fearful of having our competence or the child's ability assessed harshly . . . . Thoughtlessly we allow current trends to dictate timetables and remedies" (137).
"The extra year is an ordinary idea in my classroom. We call it reaching full cycle. It can take three years or it can take four. The children seem to sort themselves out naturally and pleasantly" (137).
November 24, 2025
This book is a series of case studies about exceptional children and how the Montessori guide (the author) included them by working with the other children. One of the common criticisms of Montessori education is that it is not appropriate for all children because it requires a child to have a peaceful personality and internal motivation. For this reason, I was intrigued by the author’s claim that any child, regardless of their background, intellectual gifts, or personality, can be successful in a Montessori environment.
The case studies seem to show that the author’s claim is true, *provided the guide is skilled, gifted, and dedicated.* However, it’s clear from the author’s own examples that many if not most guides—even those in the author’s own school—are not up to this task. This fact alone is not really different from traditional schools, but is something to consider. One of the author’s critiques (“critique” is not a strong enough word) of traditional schooling is that it appeals to the lowest common denominator of learners. Well, yes. Montessori may teach to the highest level of learners, but if only the most skilled teachers can include all children in that, then there’s a serious trade off to consider.
The author mentions more than once that she comes from a traditional school environment. I would have liked to have read how and why she shed her background to become as skilled a Montessori guide as she clearly is. What are the steps she took to transform her teaching philosophy and practice? This would have been equally as helpful, if not more so, than the case studies, although those were very good (if sometimes alarming, as in the ones that involved violence).
There’s much more to say about this book: the tendency to place all the burden and blame for students’ problems on parents (this tendency is very common among child advocates, and not undue, but in this case it is not very charitably expressed), and the author’s evident disgust with medication and “labeling” and diagnosing children. Again, while there is some merit to the author’s views and her experience has led her to her opinions, hers is a very “black and white” judgment.
The case studies seem to show that the author’s claim is true, *provided the guide is skilled, gifted, and dedicated.* However, it’s clear from the author’s own examples that many if not most guides—even those in the author’s own school—are not up to this task. This fact alone is not really different from traditional schools, but is something to consider. One of the author’s critiques (“critique” is not a strong enough word) of traditional schooling is that it appeals to the lowest common denominator of learners. Well, yes. Montessori may teach to the highest level of learners, but if only the most skilled teachers can include all children in that, then there’s a serious trade off to consider.
The author mentions more than once that she comes from a traditional school environment. I would have liked to have read how and why she shed her background to become as skilled a Montessori guide as she clearly is. What are the steps she took to transform her teaching philosophy and practice? This would have been equally as helpful, if not more so, than the case studies, although those were very good (if sometimes alarming, as in the ones that involved violence).
There’s much more to say about this book: the tendency to place all the burden and blame for students’ problems on parents (this tendency is very common among child advocates, and not undue, but in this case it is not very charitably expressed), and the author’s evident disgust with medication and “labeling” and diagnosing children. Again, while there is some merit to the author’s views and her experience has led her to her opinions, hers is a very “black and white” judgment.
July 31, 2019
I read this book as a recommendation from others. I cannot stress how wonderful this read was! Donna Goertz brings decades of experience as a Montessori guide into each story and interaction with children. I was blown away at the wisdom she used to rally a community around the "outliers". Instead of that being the weird kid, the loud kid, the crazy kid, she influenced the community to embrace each others flaws and help each other grow. This has quickly made it onto my Top 5 books that I've read to date. If you have children, work with children, know children-this is a must read.
October 20, 2021
Completely agree with the lens for viewing children and her way of bringing children into the LE community. MANY questions, however, about her black-and-white thinking leading to near-demonization of "traditional" schooling by the end, as well as her complete dismissal of the value of medication and early intervention. Great theory, inspiring stories - I want to be her as a teacher when I grow up - but questionable framing and execution.
February 16, 2018
I really enjoyed the anecdotal style, which enabled me to finish the book in a day or so. The candid descriptions of children and their challenges made this book immediately applicable to current interactions with children, and the calm search for peaceful resolutions gave hope that they are out there for those who are willing to work for them.
July 22, 2018
Builds heavily on the works of Montessori and Paley. Not a bad read. Early childhood educators can related well to the stories, and empathize.
Organized and written well.
I'd recommend this read.
Organized and written well.
I'd recommend this read.
March 26, 2020
So helpful in shaping how I think about interactions and language with students.
April 4, 2020
a glimpse on how to give children tools to cope with anger and angry peers
July 18, 2020
Must read for all of us teachers who want to accept and embrace differences and provide a safe space for children to thrive.
June 28, 2024
Had to read this for my cert program. Donna and I would not get along in real life
August 9, 2008
This book is a pretty strong argument for Montessori and how it can be a classroom environment that is actually "healing" for children with a variety of challenges. It supports my belief that Montessori is for every child- I don't think that every teacher is perfect for every child, but as a philosophy, Montessori can meet the needs of all children. Not that I am biased or anything...
May 14, 2013
Very inspiring. Makes me want to move to Austin to put my kids in this school! Author may be a bit unrealistic in terms of the amount of effort parents can put into making the home environment perfect for their children. Sometimes the effort to create a peaceful home actually causes the parents so much stress that it's not worth it.
Read
July 22, 2009Been reading this in bits and snatches, it's very good and positive. Mostly based on "problem" children in the Montessori classroom, but still enlightening as far as temperments and the Montessori method. TBC...
March 9, 2016
This book was a great book that was very enlightening. I'm not a Montessori teacher, but there's a lot that I've been able to learn (and will continue to learn) from this book! Definitely recommended if you work with children.
Want to read
April 24, 2008I haven't gotten into this book as much as I'd have liked to. I might need to read it over the summer. I have a feeling it will be on the currently-reading shelf for a while.
October 17, 2013
Wonderful read for any Montessori educator or parent.
Read
May 6, 2012an amazing book. inspirational to those of us working in a montessori classroom, and with our own children!
September 5, 2013
Interesting read about a true Montessori classroom. Things are very different at our Montessori school, but it still had some great ideas and perspective.
Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews