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Kill Your Friends
AS the twentieth century breathes its very last, with Britpop at its zenith, twenty-seven-year-old A&R man Steven Stelfox is slashing and burning his way through London’s music industry. Blithely crisscrossing the globe in search of the next megahit—fueled by greed and inhuman quantities of cocaine—Stelfox freely indulges in an unending orgy of self-gratification. But the industry is changing fast and the hits are drying up, and the only way he’s going to salvage his sagging career is by taking the idea of “cutthroat” to murderous new levels.
324 pages, Paperback
First published February 4, 2008
382 people are currently reading
8709 people want to read
About the author
John Niven
30 books885 followersBorn in Irvine, Ayrshire, Niven read English Literature at Glasgow University, graduating in 1991 with First Class honours. For the next ten years, he worked for a variety of record companies, including London Records and Independiente. He left the music industry to write full time in 2002 and published his debut novella Music from Big Pink in 2005 (Continuum Press). The novella was optioned for the screen by CC Films with a script has been written by English playwright Jez Butterworth. Niven's breakthrough novel Kill Your Friends is a satire of the music business, based on his brief career in A&R, during which he passed up the chance to sign Coldplay and Muse. The novel was published by William Heinemann in 2008 and achieved much acclaim, with Word magazine describing it as "possibly the best British Novel since Trainspotting". It has been translated into seven languages and was a bestseller in Britain and Germany. Niven has since published The Amateurs (2009), The Second Coming (2011), Cold Hands (2012) and Straight White Male (2013).
He also writes original screenplays with writing partner Nick Ball, the younger brother of British TV presenter Zoë Ball. His journalistic contributions to newspapers and magazines include a monthly column for Q magazine, entitled "London Kills Me". In 2009 Niven wrote a controversial article for The Independent newspaper where he attacked the media's largely complacent coverage of Michael Jackson's death.
Niven lives in Buckinghamshire with his fiancee and infant daughter. He has a teenage son from a previous marriage.
He also writes original screenplays with writing partner Nick Ball, the younger brother of British TV presenter Zoë Ball. His journalistic contributions to newspapers and magazines include a monthly column for Q magazine, entitled "London Kills Me". In 2009 Niven wrote a controversial article for The Independent newspaper where he attacked the media's largely complacent coverage of Michael Jackson's death.
Niven lives in Buckinghamshire with his fiancee and infant daughter. He has a teenage son from a previous marriage.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 867 reviews
January 21, 2014
This book is daaaaaaark. If it was any blacker you'd need UV light to read it. My initial impression was that it was 'American Psycho' minus the violence. Then the violence began.
Whereas 'American Psycho' parodied American corporate 80s excess to the extreme, 'Kill Your Friends' parodies the record industry in 90s Britain. Steven Stelfox is an A&R man for a well-known music label in 1997's London. His job is to discover hits and make the company a buttload of money. He doesn't spend a lot of time doing this however as he's usually too busy coked up, fornicating, or verbally or mentally tearing into anyone else whose existence is not his own. Interestingly, this book is called 'Kill Your Friends' however Steven has no friends. None that we come into contact with anyway. There is a lot of social interaction, however it is all with colleagues, musicians, prostitutes, and unfortunates who happen to cross Steven's path.
I'll never understand people who rate a book down because they can't relate to the central character. I don't want to read about myself. Steven Stelfox is despicable. If you could relate to him I'd be worried. But he also made me laugh more than any other novel's character has in years. This book is relentless, nasty, brutal, but oh so hilariously entertaining if you're not easily offended. I couldn't stop cracking up with laughter reading this on my tube journeys. If I didn't have the book in my hand I would have looked like a demented grinning idiot to the other passengers.
It doesn't revel (wallow) in the violence like 'American Psycho' does. There are only a couple key scenes of violence and they are brief. In fact those who enjoyed 'Psycho' but couldn't stomach the atrocities might very well have found the perfect book in 'Kill Your Friends'.
Like with a lot of films I love, I'm often drawn to dark and disturbing novels. I think it's because I'm so cheerful and happy in real life. It's kind of like a balancing act. And to me it's almost like immersing yourself in and learning about a different culture.
As cruel and nasty as Steven Stelfox is, I think it'd be difficult to be personally offended by anything in here as Stelfox takes potshots at every spectrum of society. Nobody is safe from his withering wrath.
So if you're looking for a pitch black read that is almost guaranteed to get your chuckle gears in motion, you probably won't do much better than 'Kill Your Friends'. At the very least it will make you feel so much better as a person.
Whereas 'American Psycho' parodied American corporate 80s excess to the extreme, 'Kill Your Friends' parodies the record industry in 90s Britain. Steven Stelfox is an A&R man for a well-known music label in 1997's London. His job is to discover hits and make the company a buttload of money. He doesn't spend a lot of time doing this however as he's usually too busy coked up, fornicating, or verbally or mentally tearing into anyone else whose existence is not his own. Interestingly, this book is called 'Kill Your Friends' however Steven has no friends. None that we come into contact with anyway. There is a lot of social interaction, however it is all with colleagues, musicians, prostitutes, and unfortunates who happen to cross Steven's path.
I'll never understand people who rate a book down because they can't relate to the central character. I don't want to read about myself. Steven Stelfox is despicable. If you could relate to him I'd be worried. But he also made me laugh more than any other novel's character has in years. This book is relentless, nasty, brutal, but oh so hilariously entertaining if you're not easily offended. I couldn't stop cracking up with laughter reading this on my tube journeys. If I didn't have the book in my hand I would have looked like a demented grinning idiot to the other passengers.
It doesn't revel (wallow) in the violence like 'American Psycho' does. There are only a couple key scenes of violence and they are brief. In fact those who enjoyed 'Psycho' but couldn't stomach the atrocities might very well have found the perfect book in 'Kill Your Friends'.
Like with a lot of films I love, I'm often drawn to dark and disturbing novels. I think it's because I'm so cheerful and happy in real life. It's kind of like a balancing act. And to me it's almost like immersing yourself in and learning about a different culture.
As cruel and nasty as Steven Stelfox is, I think it'd be difficult to be personally offended by anything in here as Stelfox takes potshots at every spectrum of society. Nobody is safe from his withering wrath.
So if you're looking for a pitch black read that is almost guaranteed to get your chuckle gears in motion, you probably won't do much better than 'Kill Your Friends'. At the very least it will make you feel so much better as a person.
February 23, 2009
John Niven is what would happen if Nick Hornby got into a terrible car crash and punctured the lobe where politeness lives. I had a heck of a time getting into his novel "Kill Your Friends," since I'm not exactly fluent in vitriol. It is pages and pages of a man angrily screaming British slang for cocaine in your face, spit foaming at the corners of his mouth.
Steven Stelfox is an A&R dude negotiating the Brit pop scene in the 1990s. It's a cruel, cruel place where everyone is trying to find the next big thing. The young sexy girl singer, the song that resonates with clubbers, the reimagining of the Spice Girls, or those croony Emo "artists." When things don't go his way, Steven may do something like hammer away at a colleague's brain with a baseball bat, but only after his first murderous attempt fails: the one where he tries to overdose the guy, then plugs his orifices with all sorts of embarrassing things.
Stelfox is a moral contortionist, and lots of other -ists that exists: racist, sexist, elitist. As I got used to his voice, the book improved just enough to keep reading. Eventually I was enjoying his clever, albeit repetitious, and evil tirades:
"The laughter and smiles of the executives is brittle and plastic; we've done this so many times, often for bands and singers who turn out to be about as commercial as tooth-kind drinkable HIV for children."
"They're all good little capitalists at heart, bands. Even Thom fucking Yorke, when he's not crying about what kind of coffee beans you should be using so some cunt in Outer Mongolia can afford to put an inside toilet in his filthy gaff, even he's wondering what the marketing spend is looking like."
People are funny when they are mad. But it's an easy kind of funny.
Steven Stelfox is an A&R dude negotiating the Brit pop scene in the 1990s. It's a cruel, cruel place where everyone is trying to find the next big thing. The young sexy girl singer, the song that resonates with clubbers, the reimagining of the Spice Girls, or those croony Emo "artists." When things don't go his way, Steven may do something like hammer away at a colleague's brain with a baseball bat, but only after his first murderous attempt fails: the one where he tries to overdose the guy, then plugs his orifices with all sorts of embarrassing things.
Stelfox is a moral contortionist, and lots of other -ists that exists: racist, sexist, elitist. As I got used to his voice, the book improved just enough to keep reading. Eventually I was enjoying his clever, albeit repetitious, and evil tirades:
"The laughter and smiles of the executives is brittle and plastic; we've done this so many times, often for bands and singers who turn out to be about as commercial as tooth-kind drinkable HIV for children."
"They're all good little capitalists at heart, bands. Even Thom fucking Yorke, when he's not crying about what kind of coffee beans you should be using so some cunt in Outer Mongolia can afford to put an inside toilet in his filthy gaff, even he's wondering what the marketing spend is looking like."
People are funny when they are mad. But it's an easy kind of funny.
July 18, 2010
While I like satire this book by John Niven is satire so vile, degrading and sort of scabrous that it was just too much. There's absolutely no nuance as it's just hammer away by Niven, scene after scene, chapter after chapter of debauched antics. Too bad too as the setting, the music Q & R world in Loncon circa 1997 is rife with the chances to ruffle some feathers. Niven though shows he has no restraint in anything--writing style, plot pacing, nothing.
Usually for one of these books about a man/woman going down an unchartered path to the abyss they do it slowly, one unexpected event leading to the next before they realize it, so much momentum has started that they can't stop themselves or their behavior. Not in KILL YOUR FRIENDS. Here, from very early in the book, the protagonist is a raving a-hole to everything around him.
Satire that verges into outright contempt for the characters and the reader isn't really good satire in my opinion. It's just a writer unleashing all his/her anger on the page in a torrent of rage. Saved from 1 star due to the music element.
Usually for one of these books about a man/woman going down an unchartered path to the abyss they do it slowly, one unexpected event leading to the next before they realize it, so much momentum has started that they can't stop themselves or their behavior. Not in KILL YOUR FRIENDS. Here, from very early in the book, the protagonist is a raving a-hole to everything around him.
Satire that verges into outright contempt for the characters and the reader isn't really good satire in my opinion. It's just a writer unleashing all his/her anger on the page in a torrent of rage. Saved from 1 star due to the music element.
December 20, 2019
Edit:American Psycho ripoffish. love it... i finally got the sequel Kill 'Em All and i decided to reread this. will i finish this? who knows. it depends on my mood. will probably give up because i also have to study for my exams. also it's not like i'm ever at home sooo...
....
I got it mostly because i loved the movie and later found out that it was based on a book. it was funny and dark and honestly even though the protagonist is an asshole i dig him. if you like dark humor shit you should check it out
....
I got it mostly because i loved the movie and later found out that it was based on a book. it was funny and dark and honestly even though the protagonist is an asshole i dig him. if you like dark humor shit you should check it out
July 26, 2010
Easily the winner of the funniest book of the year - possibly ever.
There are more jokes and truths on one page of this book than in the whole of other works of fictions. Its hard to describe - a bit like Patrick Bateman from American Psycho going to indie discos.
It tells the story of Steven Stelfox, an A and R man in the late 1990s and truely one of the most despicable charachters in fiction. His deeds are bad enough but you also get his inner monologue - the things he filters out are beyond belief but very funny.
In the course of the book we have his views on the recording industry, pop stars and how records are marketed to the public but we also get stunning, politcally incorrect views on everything from women (favorite position - knife held to throat is considered a response), the working classes, tax, britain, booze, drugs - everything really. Despite having no morals, everything Stelfox says is so wrong but so funny. I dont think you have to agree with him, just need a sense of humour.
The story is more a collection of thoughts/experiences as he goes through copious drugs/booze/sex trying to unearth the next big thing. Along the way, he has a couple of goes at killing one of his work rivals - the first time is hilarious and then gets a young policeman involved in the investigation (who just happens to be a musician) involvded in the cover up and 2nd subsequent murder.
I've never known a page turner like it. The discussion of real and fictional acts add to the value and of course, its from a time when I was into many of the bands discussed.
You cant stop yourself laughing at the anger of a repellant characters like this and his complete lack of any human traits.
I loved it - and I see he has other works out.
Highly recommended for the not too sensitive.
There are more jokes and truths on one page of this book than in the whole of other works of fictions. Its hard to describe - a bit like Patrick Bateman from American Psycho going to indie discos.
It tells the story of Steven Stelfox, an A and R man in the late 1990s and truely one of the most despicable charachters in fiction. His deeds are bad enough but you also get his inner monologue - the things he filters out are beyond belief but very funny.
In the course of the book we have his views on the recording industry, pop stars and how records are marketed to the public but we also get stunning, politcally incorrect views on everything from women (favorite position - knife held to throat is considered a response), the working classes, tax, britain, booze, drugs - everything really. Despite having no morals, everything Stelfox says is so wrong but so funny. I dont think you have to agree with him, just need a sense of humour.
The story is more a collection of thoughts/experiences as he goes through copious drugs/booze/sex trying to unearth the next big thing. Along the way, he has a couple of goes at killing one of his work rivals - the first time is hilarious and then gets a young policeman involved in the investigation (who just happens to be a musician) involvded in the cover up and 2nd subsequent murder.
I've never known a page turner like it. The discussion of real and fictional acts add to the value and of course, its from a time when I was into many of the bands discussed.
You cant stop yourself laughing at the anger of a repellant characters like this and his complete lack of any human traits.
I loved it - and I see he has other works out.
Highly recommended for the not too sensitive.
March 4, 2012
I was given this book and The Second Coming in a publisher's double offer, neatly wrapped up together in a cellophane wrapper. I can only surmise that this is the literary equivalent of someone posting two turds in an envelope through your letter box.
I gave up reading this book after 100 pages. Perhaps it's because I have read so many good books recently that this one seemed awful in comparison; perhaps it just is a terrible book? Either way, I couldn't stand the thought of forcing myself to read another 200 pages of it.
It is the sort of novel I imagine I might have enjoyed as a 15 year old, full of, you know, violence and drugs and sex and music and people who are young and make loads of money and just don't give a shit about anything, yeah. I know it's a satire, but it's a miserable experience reading it.
The worst book I have read in a long time.
I gave up reading this book after 100 pages. Perhaps it's because I have read so many good books recently that this one seemed awful in comparison; perhaps it just is a terrible book? Either way, I couldn't stand the thought of forcing myself to read another 200 pages of it.
It is the sort of novel I imagine I might have enjoyed as a 15 year old, full of, you know, violence and drugs and sex and music and people who are young and make loads of money and just don't give a shit about anything, yeah. I know it's a satire, but it's a miserable experience reading it.
The worst book I have read in a long time.
September 11, 2022
Having read Dave Grohl's autobiography recently, in a way, this was refreshing. Grohl's view of the characters inhabiting the music business is rose-tinted to say the least. This is the opposite - everyone is a grotesque.
That's fine, but having started out with such a degree of repulsiveness the book soon becomes very repetitive - drink, drugs, debauched sex...then murder. I get the satire - A&R people will do anything for a hit/more money etc to fund their vapid lifestyles but this could have all been wrapped up in a novella.
If you are looking for a descent into hell, I'd recommend Irvine Welsh's stuff instead of this, to which the blurb compares it.
That's fine, but having started out with such a degree of repulsiveness the book soon becomes very repetitive - drink, drugs, debauched sex...then murder. I get the satire - A&R people will do anything for a hit/more money etc to fund their vapid lifestyles but this could have all been wrapped up in a novella.
If you are looking for a descent into hell, I'd recommend Irvine Welsh's stuff instead of this, to which the blurb compares it.
July 29, 2011
A very poorly written book that simply tried too hard to be funny and shocking, but ends up being too direct to be either. A real shame that a satire on the music industry could not be a bit more clever and original.
June 4, 2016
Soundtrack - D:Ream - things can only get better
It is 1997 - the time of Cool Britannia and Things Can Only Get Better. Tony Blair is the fresh faced Prime Minister of a Britain that is newly energised, forward looking and on the up
Soundtrack - Stiff Little Fingers - Rough Trade / Pulp - Common People / The Clash - Death or Glory
Stephen Stelfox is an A&R man for a London based record company. It is his job to spot and nurture new bands. Sadly the job is all about securing product to sell to the plebs - the actual music is a secondary consideration, and integrity is a four letter word. He is cynical, ruthless and bombed out on coke and vodka most of the time (all on expenses of course). Bands are sold the dream, sucked into the machine and spat out again - broken, brutalised and in hock to their erstwhile friends in the record company.
Soundtrack - Sex Pistols - EMI / The Rezillos - Top of The Pops
Nine out of ten signed bands disappear without a trace. And yet, every now and again a record strikes a chord, a band slowly builds a following - and suddenly the money is coming in hand over fist. The A&R men are all competing to find the next big solo artist or band, and are willing to do just about anything to secure them. The problem is, no-one really has much of a clue as to what will constitute a hit single or successful band
Soundtrack - Talking Heads - Psycho Killer / Pulp - Sorted for E's and Whizz
Stelfox starts cracking up under the relentless pressure to succeed combined with his gargantuan consumption of drugs, alcohol and hookers. Added to this, he has utter contempt for the bands he is promoting, his colleagues and peers is mixed with disdain and jealousy towards anyone who looks as if they will succeed in this grubby business. Finally he snaps. The murders begin.
Soundtrack - The Buzzcocks - Everybody's Happy Nowadays
All is resolved. A happy ending ensues for Mr Stelfox - he gets what he wants at the record company, and seemingly gets away with murder. For now at least.
This book is profane, vulgar, cynical, violent, non PC and immensely funny. I enjoyed it very much.
At times it teetered on the edge of excessive parody but Niven just about reins it in - I think. Who am I to judge.
Postscript - the book name checks more than a few records and record company executives. One of those named is a chap who's great big go away townhouse we have just finished some work on. It was quite bizarre to see him named in a work of "fiction".
I also dug out an old CD "Marquee Moon" by Television to replay after it was mentioned in dispatches. The title track is 10 minutes long - not at all how I remembered it from 1977. Good album though.
It is 1997 - the time of Cool Britannia and Things Can Only Get Better. Tony Blair is the fresh faced Prime Minister of a Britain that is newly energised, forward looking and on the up
Soundtrack - Stiff Little Fingers - Rough Trade / Pulp - Common People / The Clash - Death or Glory
Stephen Stelfox is an A&R man for a London based record company. It is his job to spot and nurture new bands. Sadly the job is all about securing product to sell to the plebs - the actual music is a secondary consideration, and integrity is a four letter word. He is cynical, ruthless and bombed out on coke and vodka most of the time (all on expenses of course). Bands are sold the dream, sucked into the machine and spat out again - broken, brutalised and in hock to their erstwhile friends in the record company.
Soundtrack - Sex Pistols - EMI / The Rezillos - Top of The Pops
Nine out of ten signed bands disappear without a trace. And yet, every now and again a record strikes a chord, a band slowly builds a following - and suddenly the money is coming in hand over fist. The A&R men are all competing to find the next big solo artist or band, and are willing to do just about anything to secure them. The problem is, no-one really has much of a clue as to what will constitute a hit single or successful band
Soundtrack - Talking Heads - Psycho Killer / Pulp - Sorted for E's and Whizz
Stelfox starts cracking up under the relentless pressure to succeed combined with his gargantuan consumption of drugs, alcohol and hookers. Added to this, he has utter contempt for the bands he is promoting, his colleagues and peers is mixed with disdain and jealousy towards anyone who looks as if they will succeed in this grubby business. Finally he snaps. The murders begin.
Soundtrack - The Buzzcocks - Everybody's Happy Nowadays
All is resolved. A happy ending ensues for Mr Stelfox - he gets what he wants at the record company, and seemingly gets away with murder. For now at least.
This book is profane, vulgar, cynical, violent, non PC and immensely funny. I enjoyed it very much.
At times it teetered on the edge of excessive parody but Niven just about reins it in - I think. Who am I to judge.
Postscript - the book name checks more than a few records and record company executives. One of those named is a chap who's great big go away townhouse we have just finished some work on. It was quite bizarre to see him named in a work of "fiction".
I also dug out an old CD "Marquee Moon" by Television to replay after it was mentioned in dispatches. The title track is 10 minutes long - not at all how I remembered it from 1977. Good album though.
February 23, 2020
DNF at page 102
Kill Your Friends is basically a diatribe of the music industry in England in the 90's, centring around the main character of Steven Stelfox, working as an A&R man at a record company. It is filled with disgusting, immoral and drug addicted people of which Stelfox is one of the worst. This book is horrible & yet utterly fascinating at the same time - no wonder people are cynical in the music industry!
The language is crude, debauched, snide & totally politically incorrect. It's certainly NOT for the feint hearted- and honestly I can understand that. It really is below the belt in a lot of ways & I consider myself pretty open minded when it comes to books & movies. (Yet, apparently not so much as I thought, because I must be the only the person in the world who found Bad Santa really distasteful.)
In a way its a shame that there is quite so much vile language as Niven really is a clever writer, there are some funny parts in the pages I read. Its total debauchery - but its witty debauchery.
I won't be reading on though, because after the set up, there just isn't a story. None. Whatsoever. It's purely a succession of sordid vignettes involving drugs, sex & all round nastiness. I don't know what happened after 100 pages or so, but I really think there needed to be an inkling of a story by this point & there really wasn't.
Also, although the writing is fun & satirical, Niven hasn't really grasped the concept of light & shade. You really can't just bash someone over the head with the extreme for the ENTIRE content of a book without reining it in from time to time. It makes the whole thing, frankly, a little boring.
Kill Your Friends is basically a diatribe of the music industry in England in the 90's, centring around the main character of Steven Stelfox, working as an A&R man at a record company. It is filled with disgusting, immoral and drug addicted people of which Stelfox is one of the worst. This book is horrible & yet utterly fascinating at the same time - no wonder people are cynical in the music industry!
The language is crude, debauched, snide & totally politically incorrect. It's certainly NOT for the feint hearted- and honestly I can understand that. It really is below the belt in a lot of ways & I consider myself pretty open minded when it comes to books & movies. (Yet, apparently not so much as I thought, because I must be the only the person in the world who found Bad Santa really distasteful.)
In a way its a shame that there is quite so much vile language as Niven really is a clever writer, there are some funny parts in the pages I read. Its total debauchery - but its witty debauchery.
I won't be reading on though, because after the set up, there just isn't a story. None. Whatsoever. It's purely a succession of sordid vignettes involving drugs, sex & all round nastiness. I don't know what happened after 100 pages or so, but I really think there needed to be an inkling of a story by this point & there really wasn't.
Also, although the writing is fun & satirical, Niven hasn't really grasped the concept of light & shade. You really can't just bash someone over the head with the extreme for the ENTIRE content of a book without reining it in from time to time. It makes the whole thing, frankly, a little boring.
December 23, 2017
Charmless, derivative, dated rubbish. It captures the worst of the late 1990s, which I suppose is an achievement of sorts, but in the style of an 18 year old who has swallowed Brett Easton Ellis whole and tried to reproduce him minus the satire and wit. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a sucker for a misanthropic anti-hero, which I suppose is why I picked this up despite the clear warning signs in the blurb. What I’m not so keen on is crude, joyless misogyny of the type that largely went of fashion with FHM and Loaded.
July 20, 2021
Sono di mentalità aperta, non sono una puritana.
Ciò nonostante questo libro è scurrile senza motivo. Non posso credere che un individuo bestemmi e sproloqui sempre anche quando pensa.
Una concezione delle donne da Medioevo.
Non riesco nemmeno a catalogarlo come libro d'intrattenimento. Non oso pensare se un adolescente si approccia a tale lettura.
Non è irriverente, è volgare nel senso più basso del termine.
Il libro più brutto mai letto.
Ciò nonostante questo libro è scurrile senza motivo. Non posso credere che un individuo bestemmi e sproloqui sempre anche quando pensa.
Una concezione delle donne da Medioevo.
Non riesco nemmeno a catalogarlo come libro d'intrattenimento. Non oso pensare se un adolescente si approccia a tale lettura.
Non è irriverente, è volgare nel senso più basso del termine.
Il libro più brutto mai letto.
March 24, 2019
Videorecensione: https://youtu.be/qPqwhtry8Nk
May 13, 2021
All you need to know about this VERY non-PC novel is this throughline: "music exec Stelfox shags, snorts and slaughters his way through 1997" (Thank you, "London Paper", whoever you are.)
Stelfox is probably one of the most despicable characters you'll ever read. And because you're in his head, you get the full-throttle experience -- and that can be intense. Stelfox hates everybody, is chronically sexist, racist and every other negative -ist in the dictionary. And to top it off is no good at his job and kinda hates music in general. Shame he's an overpaid music exec.
But he comes with an infallible love for himself, a cocaine habit that'd tank an elephant and an undying affection for crass porn, which all blossoms to insane heights as he hits the motherlode of self-pity, because...
He wasn't promoted to A&R department manager.
Some other jerk was.
And now that jerk is gonna pay.
"Kill Your Friends" is touted as a comedy. Is it? Yep. But, at least for me, it only started to get really hilarious in the last third when the shit hits the fan and Stelfox really has to swim. I giggled for a good 5 minutes after I closed the novel, something I'd only done once up till about page 150.
Up until the midpoint, it can seem rather repetitive in parts and like the plot is stalling out - how often does Stelfox snort coke? Lost count. How often does he order a prostitute? Lost count. But wait for it. It DOES go somewhere and you'll be shaking your head and laughing when it does. Or, at least I was. (You've been warned)
A solid 4 stars for the UK's biggest wanker!
Stelfox is probably one of the most despicable characters you'll ever read. And because you're in his head, you get the full-throttle experience -- and that can be intense. Stelfox hates everybody, is chronically sexist, racist and every other negative -ist in the dictionary. And to top it off is no good at his job and kinda hates music in general. Shame he's an overpaid music exec.
But he comes with an infallible love for himself, a cocaine habit that'd tank an elephant and an undying affection for crass porn, which all blossoms to insane heights as he hits the motherlode of self-pity, because...
He wasn't promoted to A&R department manager.
Some other jerk was.
And now that jerk is gonna pay.
"Kill Your Friends" is touted as a comedy. Is it? Yep. But, at least for me, it only started to get really hilarious in the last third when the shit hits the fan and Stelfox really has to swim. I giggled for a good 5 minutes after I closed the novel, something I'd only done once up till about page 150.
Up until the midpoint, it can seem rather repetitive in parts and like the plot is stalling out - how often does Stelfox snort coke? Lost count. How often does he order a prostitute? Lost count. But wait for it. It DOES go somewhere and you'll be shaking your head and laughing when it does. Or, at least I was. (You've been warned)
A solid 4 stars for the UK's biggest wanker!
April 16, 2014
A friend gave me a loan of this a long while back but I wasn't sure about reading it. I abandoned American Psycho near the end after becoming tired of the endless descriptions of designer clothing and the sexual violence, which got more and more gratuitous and unpleasant as the book went along. Some reviewers compared Kill Your Friends to that book, so I put off starting it. I can see why they are compared but I found Niven's book far more engaging for a number of reasons.
The main character, Steven Stelfox, is a narcissistic, drug-addled, violent, sexist racist. I found his views and much of his behaviour repellent (as I was meant to) but he was often funny in a completely inappropriate way. He's a caricature - a souped-up South Park character. Patrick Bateman in Easton Ellis's story is irredeemable and his violence is random and unstructured. Stelfox has a purpose to his violence - to get on in his career - and this made it more 'understandable'.
It's a satire on the music industry of the 1990's and is over the top in its approach. However, I worked in a record store at that time and there is much truth among the invention and exaggeration. This helped make it more credible and entertaining for me.
There are some very funny moments in this book, some of them pretty dark. I found American Psycho almost entirely devoid of humour.
It won't be to everyone's taste. If you're easily offended, likely to take Niven too literally or don't enjoy descriptions of violence, drug taking and sexual deviance, give it a wide berth. If you can see the irony, satire and poking of fun underlying this novel, you should enjoy it.
The main character, Steven Stelfox, is a narcissistic, drug-addled, violent, sexist racist. I found his views and much of his behaviour repellent (as I was meant to) but he was often funny in a completely inappropriate way. He's a caricature - a souped-up South Park character. Patrick Bateman in Easton Ellis's story is irredeemable and his violence is random and unstructured. Stelfox has a purpose to his violence - to get on in his career - and this made it more 'understandable'.
It's a satire on the music industry of the 1990's and is over the top in its approach. However, I worked in a record store at that time and there is much truth among the invention and exaggeration. This helped make it more credible and entertaining for me.
There are some very funny moments in this book, some of them pretty dark. I found American Psycho almost entirely devoid of humour.
It won't be to everyone's taste. If you're easily offended, likely to take Niven too literally or don't enjoy descriptions of violence, drug taking and sexual deviance, give it a wide berth. If you can see the irony, satire and poking of fun underlying this novel, you should enjoy it.
April 16, 2013
Tries to be a London version of American Psycho -fails.
May 29, 2018
Hilarious!! If you like books like Trainspotting, check this out.
July 14, 2020
Una via di mezzo tra il nichilismo esasperato dei romanzi di Bret Easton Ellis e la follia autodistruttiva dei personaggi di Irvine Welsh, sullo sfondo della scena musicale degli anni '90.
La storia di un talent scout di una major discografica in crisi mano a mano che i successi si fanno sempre più rari: tra cinismo e feste selvagge, sesso e cocaina, arriva il momento in cui capisce che non basta più stordirsi per resistere in un ambiente pieno di colleghi incompetenti e spietati, ma deve “attivarsi” per eliminare ogni cosa (e persona) che lo ostacola.
Libro divertente quanto irriverente che dipinge un periodo musicale irripetibile mescolando le vere gesta di Radiohead, Prodigy, Oasis e Nirvana, a quelle di artisti immaginari che John Niven inventa per mescolare continuamente le carte.
Indeciso fino alla fine se dargli 3 o 4 stelle, si merita la quarta per alcuni momenti davvero riusciti: su tutti la cinica corsa al singolo di successo subito dopo la morte di Lady Diana (ovviamente il protagonista viene bruciato sul tempo da Candle in the wind di Elton John) e il paragrafo su Steve Albini storico produttore di In Utero.
La storia di un talent scout di una major discografica in crisi mano a mano che i successi si fanno sempre più rari: tra cinismo e feste selvagge, sesso e cocaina, arriva il momento in cui capisce che non basta più stordirsi per resistere in un ambiente pieno di colleghi incompetenti e spietati, ma deve “attivarsi” per eliminare ogni cosa (e persona) che lo ostacola.
Libro divertente quanto irriverente che dipinge un periodo musicale irripetibile mescolando le vere gesta di Radiohead, Prodigy, Oasis e Nirvana, a quelle di artisti immaginari che John Niven inventa per mescolare continuamente le carte.
Indeciso fino alla fine se dargli 3 o 4 stelle, si merita la quarta per alcuni momenti davvero riusciti: su tutti la cinica corsa al singolo di successo subito dopo la morte di Lady Diana (ovviamente il protagonista viene bruciato sul tempo da Candle in the wind di Elton John) e il paragrafo su Steve Albini storico produttore di In Utero.
June 23, 2025
2010 review: It's been a good few years since I read this book, however I remember devouring it. I also remember one moment that caused me to laugh so much I had tears rolling down my face. This is a very, very dark book, and not for the feint hearted. It's also a brilliantly told tale of the excesses and foolishness of the British music industry during the boom years of Brit Pop.
2025 review: This has not aged well. Or maybe my sensibility has completely changed in the last 30 years? Probably a bit of both. It now strikes me as offensive, unpleasant and repetitive. I gave up at 36%. Still a good reminder of the music scene of the 1990s and it’s associated excess.
I've reread a few books this year (2025) and been amazed at how most have really stood up, alas not this one. Ah well.
2025 review: This has not aged well. Or maybe my sensibility has completely changed in the last 30 years? Probably a bit of both. It now strikes me as offensive, unpleasant and repetitive. I gave up at 36%. Still a good reminder of the music scene of the 1990s and it’s associated excess.
I've reread a few books this year (2025) and been amazed at how most have really stood up, alas not this one. Ah well.
February 12, 2009
This book is so awful, I couldn't even be bothered to finish it (which I usually don't do). Really, really horrible. The writer cannot pull off his Bret Easton Ellis impersonation and it is, quite frankly, a book even emptier and more astonishingly boring than Ellis' creations.
Read
September 23, 2008"Kill Your Friends" is a special breed of novel. Reading it, I felt like I was looking through a particularly wide peephole into a sordid world of drugs, sex, and booze populated by soulless characters who somehow live among us. Needless to say, I was hooked. Steven Stelfox is an A&R rep for a major British music label in 1997. His whole world revolves about doing anything --be it illegal, immoral, or just plain wrong -- to get a hit record. This novel is full of fun British slang that I find myself using (much to the confusion of my friends). For fans of Irvine Welsh, Bret Easton Ellis, or Chad Kultgen, this is a perfect book. At times shocking, this book kept a guilty smile on my face. There were many times I had to put the book down, I was laughing so hard. This book is not for the faint of heart, or those who want to believe that pop music and hit records come out of some happy bubblegumland. No, if you read this novel, the music we listen to comes from a fetid underworld of cocaine, illegal sex and murder. But it is a fun world to visit!
- Joe
- Joe
August 5, 2015
I have literally just finished this book. I really struggled to give it a rating. It's hard to have enjoyed but hated a book so much all the way through. I was completely engrossed, I couldn't put it down, I needed to know what happened next. And yet I hated it all the way through. I've never loathed a character as much as I did.
The amount of things that were happening, the language, the views of women and the music industry, the jumping about from one thing to another made me feel lost. The violence and extremeness of the book happened that often that the shock wore off and I started to feel out of touch, and disorientated.
So fantastically written in that sense, kept me wanting more, didn't put it down.
I will not read it again and I hated it.
Yeah giving it stars is hard and I've never had such mixed feeling before.
The amount of things that were happening, the language, the views of women and the music industry, the jumping about from one thing to another made me feel lost. The violence and extremeness of the book happened that often that the shock wore off and I started to feel out of touch, and disorientated.
So fantastically written in that sense, kept me wanting more, didn't put it down.
I will not read it again and I hated it.
Yeah giving it stars is hard and I've never had such mixed feeling before.
November 20, 2020
I bought this book just becayse i thought the Cover was pretty cool-WHAT A WASTE OF MONEY. The deeper you read into the book, the more annoyed you get by the angry and frustrated main character-this was the first book i threw away after the first half, as it did not become better but just worser and worser by every page. If you are in general a happy person and you want to feel sad and frustrated i can recommend you this book-but otherwise please don't waste your time or money on this.
June 2, 2023
'Kill Your Friends' - John Niven's debut novel of 2008, a so-called satire on the music business, through the eyes of one Steven Stelfox A&R agent in the music industry, set in 1997.
Based in part at least, on Niven's own experiences working in the music business, prior to becoming an author.
Published only a year before the far superior although much less critically acclaimed 'The Amateurs' - which is a very different but far more accomplished novel.
What we have here is not the hard edged wittiness of Irvine Welsh's 'Trainspotting' - but merely relentless, stream of consciousness, unremitting tedious nastiness. 'Friends' is very much of the time in which it is set and is locked in to that period. It's a book that is rarely funny but more often than not.
Whilst it's quite feasibly perhaps an accurate or exaggerated picture of the music/A&R industry as experienced by Niven for a decade - a world that is hugely irreverent, iconoclastic and imbued through and through with toxic masculinity. It's a world painted here by Niven of nevererending drug and violent sex fuelled existence - filled with, consumed by resentment, hatred and loathing.
'Friends' is reputedly an assault on the music industry and all in it - the macheavelian existence of the likes of Stelfox, where absolutely nothing is off limits and there is a reasonably good book here fighting to get out of this morass - but compared to Niven's subsequent and superior novel 'The Amateurs', 'Friends' does not stand up.
Nasty and prurient - which presumably is the point, 'Friends' may well be a distilled version of the reality Niven encountered in the A&R business - this doesn't however make it any the less tedious an experience for the reader.
Based in part at least, on Niven's own experiences working in the music business, prior to becoming an author.
Published only a year before the far superior although much less critically acclaimed 'The Amateurs' - which is a very different but far more accomplished novel.
What we have here is not the hard edged wittiness of Irvine Welsh's 'Trainspotting' - but merely relentless, stream of consciousness, unremitting tedious nastiness. 'Friends' is very much of the time in which it is set and is locked in to that period. It's a book that is rarely funny but more often than not.
Whilst it's quite feasibly perhaps an accurate or exaggerated picture of the music/A&R industry as experienced by Niven for a decade - a world that is hugely irreverent, iconoclastic and imbued through and through with toxic masculinity. It's a world painted here by Niven of nevererending drug and violent sex fuelled existence - filled with, consumed by resentment, hatred and loathing.
'Friends' is reputedly an assault on the music industry and all in it - the macheavelian existence of the likes of Stelfox, where absolutely nothing is off limits and there is a reasonably good book here fighting to get out of this morass - but compared to Niven's subsequent and superior novel 'The Amateurs', 'Friends' does not stand up.
Nasty and prurient - which presumably is the point, 'Friends' may well be a distilled version of the reality Niven encountered in the A&R business - this doesn't however make it any the less tedious an experience for the reader.
April 13, 2014
I've read "American Psycho" by Bret Easton Ellis, and "A Clockwork Orange" by Anthony Burgess, so I am not unfamiliar with novels that contain a lot of violence or depravity, nor do I automatically dislike them. For that matter, I have read, and greatly enjoyed, several works by Chuck Palahniuk, who is also known for works that contain elements that are difficult to stomach as a reader. Despite all of this, I did not like "Kill Your Friends" by John Niven at all.
I think my problem with this novel is that all of the violence, in all of its forms, seems utterly unnecessary. Sure, it does move the plot line forward, since the only reason why the main character's life ends up as it does is because of specific violent acts he commits. However, the rest, especially the descriptions of his sexual preferences and conquests, his drug habits and messed up mindset, don't always seem to be necessary. It seems as if the author wanted to write something as awful as possible, just to see if he could get away with it. Yes, he did get away with it, but does it make the work any better? That's questionable.
"American Psycho" was written in a more elegant manner throughout, and while the violence is rampant throughout it, the way in which it is presented makes the novel more than just smut. It makes it difficult to read, but there are still elements of humor and intelligence mixed in throughout. "A Clockwork Orange," as anyone who has read it can probably attest, is difficult to read because of the violence, but also because of the language of the book. It took me multiple tries to get through the first chapter, and then, all of a sudden, I could speed through the rest of it. Despite the violence in the novel, and the language, it is still a popular book to this day, because of its social commentary, and because of, once again, its intelligence and observations of humanity. But "Kill Your Friends"? This just seems to be violence and gore for the sake of violence and gore.
Is this the worst book I've ever read? Definitely not. However, I don't feel like I got anything from it, other than a definite dislike of most of the characters in the novel. "Kill Your Friends" just seems pointless. Of course, if you're into things about violence and drug use and sexual violence etc., then this may be for you. But if you're looking for something that's more intelligent, yet still has some of the elements mentioned in the previous sentence, then there are many other novels out there that I would recommend before this one.
I think my problem with this novel is that all of the violence, in all of its forms, seems utterly unnecessary. Sure, it does move the plot line forward, since the only reason why the main character's life ends up as it does is because of specific violent acts he commits. However, the rest, especially the descriptions of his sexual preferences and conquests, his drug habits and messed up mindset, don't always seem to be necessary. It seems as if the author wanted to write something as awful as possible, just to see if he could get away with it. Yes, he did get away with it, but does it make the work any better? That's questionable.
"American Psycho" was written in a more elegant manner throughout, and while the violence is rampant throughout it, the way in which it is presented makes the novel more than just smut. It makes it difficult to read, but there are still elements of humor and intelligence mixed in throughout. "A Clockwork Orange," as anyone who has read it can probably attest, is difficult to read because of the violence, but also because of the language of the book. It took me multiple tries to get through the first chapter, and then, all of a sudden, I could speed through the rest of it. Despite the violence in the novel, and the language, it is still a popular book to this day, because of its social commentary, and because of, once again, its intelligence and observations of humanity. But "Kill Your Friends"? This just seems to be violence and gore for the sake of violence and gore.
Is this the worst book I've ever read? Definitely not. However, I don't feel like I got anything from it, other than a definite dislike of most of the characters in the novel. "Kill Your Friends" just seems pointless. Of course, if you're into things about violence and drug use and sexual violence etc., then this may be for you. But if you're looking for something that's more intelligent, yet still has some of the elements mentioned in the previous sentence, then there are many other novels out there that I would recommend before this one.
February 9, 2009
I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. This is without a doubt the most accurate depiction of the record industry that has been novelized. Having lived it myself during the same period this was about (late 90's) i had many a flashback. In order to really see something you have to step away and return with clarity. Although the main character in this novel, a London A&R rep trying to deal with the changing climate of the industry at the beginning of the internet age, abuses himself more than I ever could have imagined, his thoughts about the industry are spot on. An egotist with an inferiority complex best describes him. On the outside he is the most important man you would ever encounter and he believes he is changing the world with his oh so important musical talents but on the inside he knows that the industry itself is nothing but smoke and mirrors.
I don't believe you have to be close to the music industry to enjoy this work but it will help. The story is good and moves rapidly between binges and conferences. Imagine a Hunter Thompson interpretation of a Nick Hornby story and you get the picture. At times it's unbelievable and at others you will laugh so hard you will skip the record. After watching last nights Grammy's I couldn't agree more with the authors depiction of a manufactured product that takes itself so seriously it's absurd.
I don't believe you have to be close to the music industry to enjoy this work but it will help. The story is good and moves rapidly between binges and conferences. Imagine a Hunter Thompson interpretation of a Nick Hornby story and you get the picture. At times it's unbelievable and at others you will laugh so hard you will skip the record. After watching last nights Grammy's I couldn't agree more with the authors depiction of a manufactured product that takes itself so seriously it's absurd.
June 12, 2012
In lesser hands the hateful protagonist of this novel would be unreadable. Not so in Niven's capable grasp.
Stelfox is racist, rude, sexist, ruthlessly ambitious and wonderfully honest (at least in how he sees the world). That Niven allows such a fantastic bastard like Stelfox to triumph throughout the book is testament to the man's ability to make you like and even care about his horrific main character. Y
You laugh when you know you should not and grimace at his too accurate and too severe descriptions and appraisals of the poor people that Stelfox uses and abuses.
This book is certainly not for everyone.
It's dark humour (which smacks of very Scottish, "I'll tell it tae ye straight boy" tones), keen observations of peoples' behaviour and brutal description hit the mark for me. Maybe its a Scottish thing, but I doubt it.
John Niven is a funny clever big fudd of a man. Everyone needs this books in their lives. (Not you, you know who you are, go take your mealy-mouthed disapproving gaze elsewhwere. Maybe Twighlight will suit you better).
Stelfox is racist, rude, sexist, ruthlessly ambitious and wonderfully honest (at least in how he sees the world). That Niven allows such a fantastic bastard like Stelfox to triumph throughout the book is testament to the man's ability to make you like and even care about his horrific main character. Y
You laugh when you know you should not and grimace at his too accurate and too severe descriptions and appraisals of the poor people that Stelfox uses and abuses.
This book is certainly not for everyone.
It's dark humour (which smacks of very Scottish, "I'll tell it tae ye straight boy" tones), keen observations of peoples' behaviour and brutal description hit the mark for me. Maybe its a Scottish thing, but I doubt it.
John Niven is a funny clever big fudd of a man. Everyone needs this books in their lives. (Not you, you know who you are, go take your mealy-mouthed disapproving gaze elsewhwere. Maybe Twighlight will suit you better).
August 19, 2013
Vile, horrendous, racist chauvinist and utterly believable: protagonist Stelfox is the ultimate anti-hero.
This is my favourite book. It is hilarious. I found myself reading it slack-jawed, mouth hanging open on the commute, then letting out a giggle at the most incredibly inappropriate things.
Reading other reviews, some people have been offended by this book - which is no surprise. If you're easily offended, leave it on the shelf - or try and remember that it is a work of fiction in the first person, not the views of someone who actually exists.
I also read Niven's The Amateur which was an amusing read, laugh out loud in places and quite heart-warming. However, it was nothing like this which you should remember if you love this book and want to find something similar.
This is my favourite book. It is hilarious. I found myself reading it slack-jawed, mouth hanging open on the commute, then letting out a giggle at the most incredibly inappropriate things.
Reading other reviews, some people have been offended by this book - which is no surprise. If you're easily offended, leave it on the shelf - or try and remember that it is a work of fiction in the first person, not the views of someone who actually exists.
I also read Niven's The Amateur which was an amusing read, laugh out loud in places and quite heart-warming. However, it was nothing like this which you should remember if you love this book and want to find something similar.
February 20, 2012
Someone told me an old band of mine was mentioned in this book, and it's true! My old band from my distant youth does get a mention.
My goodness but this is brimming with vitriol. This is a fierce tumble through a year in the 1990s through the eyes of a ex-A&R guy who really was there in the 90's music mania. It feels mega authentic, especially if you've lived through it because all the name checks and band references are so on the button.
A bit of a tough read because the protagonist is misogynistic, homophobic and racist but really clever amusing storytelling!
My goodness but this is brimming with vitriol. This is a fierce tumble through a year in the 1990s through the eyes of a ex-A&R guy who really was there in the 90's music mania. It feels mega authentic, especially if you've lived through it because all the name checks and band references are so on the button.
A bit of a tough read because the protagonist is misogynistic, homophobic and racist but really clever amusing storytelling!
September 15, 2014
This book has been written a thousand different times in a thousand different ways in a thousand different settings by a thousand different authors, and every one of them is better than this one. I gave up 1/3 of the way through, and I'll finish almost anything.
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