The Smell Of Cedar

by River Dixon

Sarah’s day was already off to a bad start when the arrival of a strange package from an unknown sender sent her spiraling into a state of paranoia. Memories of a tortured childhood in her grandmother’s care taunt her as she tries to piece together the events of the past few months—the events that have led up to this day. She’s convinced that a killer is coming for her, and it’s become a race against time and madness to figure out who is pulling the strings in this game of hunt or be hunted.

Genres: Horror

118 pages, Kindle Edition

Published September 8, 2020

About the author

River Dixon has unknowingly found himself trapped in the incessant heat and beauty of Arizona. It is here, along with his family, that he finds solace stringing together words in an attempt to find a structure or sequence that may one day make sense of all this. River can be found hanging out at thestoriesinbetween.com where he shares his poetry and short fiction.

Reviews

[Mort · Rating 5 out of 5]

*Originally reviewed at IndieMuse
* https://www.myindiemuse.com/author/mo...

4.5 STARS

While I will usually make a joke or two to hide the fact that my reviewing skills are not up to par, I can't do it with this one.

This vibe of this story reminded me of the movie BAD DAY ON THE BLOCK.

Sarah is losing her mind, or maybe she's lost it long ago, but the whole world seems to be out to get her, to break her, to harm her, to dominate her...and she's too strong to let it happen.

She snapped about three months before this story takes place, but I am afraid of giving away too much info, so that is all I can say about that.

On the other hand, we go back to a time when she was still a young and innocent girl. Her grandmother raised her with abuse, both physical and mental, to prepare her for the future.

It is a very grim story which is beautifully written, which raises questions about a lot of nature vs. nurture. Saddest of all is that this story may not be that far fetched, but a brutal reality for some.

Dixon showed great skill with this story, getting the timing and balance right. No jump-scares - some may even say it is not horror, but a horrifying thriller - but plenty of tension as the story moves along.

Recommended for fans of psychological horror, like Chad Lutzke.

[Peter Topside · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a very intense and disturbing psychological horror story of a woman's descent into madness. Poor Sarah was raised in a very ugly household, only to be handed over to her monstrous and abusive grandmother. And we are put in the passenger seat, watching firsthand as she goes in and out of reality, after being just beaten down in such awful ways, for years, by her caregiver. I really thought there was a very smooth process of showing Sarah's psychotic tendencies displayed, as the abused turned into the abuser, especially once she felt like she was 'in control.' You never doubted what was really happening, but couldn't necessarily place how it would all unfold, either. And Sarah meticulously went from being this meek and meager, abused little girl into this violent, damaged, paranoid, and detached woman. Now it's not always a given that someone who goes through intense abuse will take on the traits of the people who hurt them so deeply. Some may just grow up with horrible depression, anxiety, and behavioral difficulties, but not turn into bloodthirsty killers. For the sake of the story, it was done very well and made sense, but just not always guaranteed to be the case (My little public service announcement.). I was left unsure of Melanie's place in the story, especially when it pertained to the chest itself. She seemed like there was further significance to her role, but I couldn't figure it out. I also wanted to know more about the grandmother. Was she always like that? Are we to assume that type of treatment is why Sarah's mother ended up in similar circumstances to her daughter? Even if there was a brief flashback to Sarah seeing her grandmother abuse her mother to show the pattern. But this is just my preference, and having the grandmother as a sort of an ungrounded, black and white antagonist may have just worked better for the author, which is fine, as it kept the focus on Sarah. Now this was a very short read, but packed a helluva punch. Bravo!

[Peter · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sarah Collins is raised by her old grandmother after her mother is sent to prison for murder (the postman). Her grandmother isn't benevolent but very abusive and hard against Sarah turning her into a real monster over the years. She always must be in control and shows no emotion for fellow humans. What is the secret behind the smell of cedar? Why is Sarah collecting the colors mentioned? Why is the company she's working for acting that strange? This is a very disturbing tale that even got worse when Sarah falls for the delivery man. Can you guess what will happen to him? The perspectives in the plot are very well done. A very compelling psychological horror story full of child abuse, murder and madness. I can't say I felt for the main character or enjoyed the story as a whole. But the book was very well written, dark and you couldn't put it down. Highly recommended!

[Reading · Rating 4 out of 5]

This one was a character driven novella about the psychological downward spiral of a girl called Sarah, who is physically and mentally abused by her grandmother.

Very different to what I'd normally read but this one is written so well and kept me turning the pages.

I recommend to anyone who likes psychological horror.

[Jeffrey Caston · Rating 4 out of 5]

Certainly a solid horror story. But before that, I obviously need to mention one thing straight off the bat. That cover. Good grief. Some covers just grab you by the throat and DEMAND that you proceed further, even if it is where angels would otherwise fear to tread. This cover, to me, obviously fit that category. Absolutely stunning.

It features an unreliable narrator on steroids. Sarah the MC's past and present collide in spectacularly gory fashion. It is also very haunting and sad. You wonder what the MC would be like if all that bad crap that happened to her hadn't happened. The ending kind of confused me, but with an unreliable narrator I suppose that isn't that uncommon.

This is my first River Dixon read and I look forward to more.

[Hail Hydra! ~Dave Anderson~ · Rating 4 out of 5]

The slam of a wooden lid closing echoed through the darkness as Sarah drifted off with the smell of cedar all around her.

[Janie · Rating 5 out of 5]

A heartbreaking story about child abuse and mental illness. The author describes the characters and their psychological situations in perfect prose, making one want to reach out to stop the bad things from happening. The horror is real, and the outcomes of a life borne of dispassionate cruelty will not be easily forgotten. After all, "Life really wasn’t that complicated when you took the emotion out of things."

[Pat · Rating 4 out of 5]

That was a disturbing little novella that depicted one woman’s final descent into madness after an incident 3 months ago that caused a break with reality. I doubt many people go mad suddenly and for no reason. In Sarah’s case it can be attributed to the harsh physical and emotional abuse of her grandmother whom she came to live with at the age of nine.

She becomes convinced “they” are out to get her and she must strike first to retain control. I did not enjoy the thing with the eyes. If I’m squeamish about anything, it’s eyes! If you are at all squeamish this book is not for you. The story had a good build up and flowed well to the rather dramatic ending.

I won’t mention the relevance of the smell of cedar as it is integral to the story - but you may never enjoy the smell of cedar again after reading this! I have a similar chest but thankfully it’s made of camphor wood 😬

[MadameD · Rating 5 out of 5]

River Dixon’s stories, that I read, are beautifully written and tragic.
This story is about Sarah’s journey to madness, violence and chaos.
I loved it!
If you enjoy psychological horror stories, The Smell Of Cedar is for you.

[Simon McHardy · Rating 5 out of 5]

There are not many horror writers with the soul of a poet and there are fewer poets with such an uncompromisingly dark vision of mankind. Dixon is among this rare breed. The Smell of Cedar is an immaculately woven yarn with rich character development and a haunting story that will rattle around in your head long after you put it down.

[Nikki · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a chilling, disturbing, dark and fantastic read! I read this over a few days while working 12 hour shifts in the lab on my lunch breaks and in my down time. Every time I read it and headed back to doing work, I could not get the Metallica song “Frayed Ends of Sanity” out of my head.

Growing conspiracy
Everyone's after me frayed ends of sanity
Hear them calling
Hear them calling me
Me myself is after me

And then I come home from work and I have my 60 plus year old cedar chest at the foot of my bed. What was that noise? I still need a brown one?

This book really creeped me out. Mostly because shit like this happens in real life and these are the monsters that scare me the most.

Beautifully written book. Loved it, and am looking forward to reading more from this author!

[Rayne Havok · Rating 5 out of 5]

Whoa!
Seriously, what a ride. The author has done something great here. There is a perfect mix of slow-burn-haunting and vile-horror.

So beautifully written, that it lulls you into a sense of rhythm that increases without you being aware, until your heart is pounding faster and then you realize you're reading with your eyes wide and mouth agape.
I mean, at least I did.
Highly recommend.

[Vicky Lelove · Rating 4 out of 5]

A short horror read that's more unnerving than gory of woman's down hill spiral with mental health after the death of her grandma.. Sometimes a story is not all that it seems and sometimes it's not just a cedar box but a safety net, comfort and escapism.

[Paul (Life In The Slow Lane) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Red Riding Hood: But Grandma, what a big bitch you are!
Grandma: All the better to cause you mental anguish my dear.

If this had been written back in the 50s, I reckon Alfred Hitchcock would have made a movie about it. Poor Sarah. Her mom gets sent to prison when Sarah is very young. As if that wasn't mentally disturbing enough, her grandmother raises her with cruelty and abuse, both physical and mental. Granny regularly locks poor little Sarah in a cedar chest for days at a time. What a cow! Once granny is gone, Sarah's mental state is like a balloon being blown up. You know it's going to pop. It takes just one life event to send Sarah over the edge. Being fired by her so-called friend Susan is that pin that punctures the rubber gas bag. This is the story of Sarah's trip over the waterfall of mild insanity into the swirling mess of complete madness below. (Sorry about my mixed metaphors there. I think I need therapy after reading this.)

The chapters bounce us back and forth in time making the plot like a dogs breakfast. But it succeeds in slowly painting a picture of Sarah's mind...and that picture is like a messed-up Picasso. If you have delicate sensibilities, or chunder when you accidentally see an episode of Game of Thrones, this book ain't for you. There are some STRONG visuals!

Despite the need for a strong stomach, this is a very well written shortish novella. I liked it.

[Regina Watts · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reminded me of the movie MAY, possessed with a grim atmosphere that catapults you straight through to the end. Can't ask for more in a horror story...and I thought MY family was dysfunctional!

[Candace Nola · Rating 4 out of 5]

River Dixon has expertly penned a deeply haunting story that speaks of tragedy upon tragedy as a middle-aged woman experiences a crisis within herself. Paranoia, trauma, and horrific memories set the course as she takes a disturbing walk through her memories and recalls being brought up by her sadistic grandmother. When she learns that her grandmother has passed, she goes back to the old house to set those affairs in order, seeing firsthand the nightmares of her past.  

As she returns home, her confused state of mind only deepens as she becomes convinced that someone is stalking her, hunting her and she becomes determined to become the hunter instead, even as her mind slips further from reality.

“The Smell of Cedar” is truly a disturbing read, one that will haunt you for a long time after you read it.

Four stars for a truly uncomfortably dark book. 

[Renée · Rating 4 out of 5]

A haunting, beautifully written story of a woman's descent into madness. I will be checking out other works from this author. Highly recommended.

[Brian Bowyer · Rating 5 out of 5]

Haunting and Disturbing!

After being blown away by "The Water Revival" in the BETWEEN A SPIDER'S EYES anthology, I was keen to read more Dixon, and blazed through THE SMELL OF CEDAR in only a couple of days. This is a dark, gripping, beautifully-written novella, with some of the smoothest prose I've encountered. Highly recommended!

[Michael · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another masterpiece by River Dixon. I read Chapman, and was so impressed by that book. Sarah is dealing with a lot of trauma from living with her grandma. This story is pure madness.

[M Ennenbach · Rating 5 out of 5]

Stunning

This story plants seeds in your mind that take root and linger long after the talents told. Buy it twice.

[M. J. · Rating 4 out of 5]

A disturbing tale on the violent consequences of trauma, a patiently crafted story that builds up the tension and creates suspicion while still presenting a solid sequence of tragedies. No one is to be trusted and the world will try to break you, not if grandma can help, not if she breaks you first. Graphically violent but not psychologically shallow, an interesting and original exploration of this uncomfortable theme.

[Brad Tierney · Rating 5 out of 5]

Inside, spray, hammer, head. 😭☠️

One of the deepest plunges into psychosis and despair I’ve ever experienced. I’m rocked. Absolutely rocked. I’ll probably never forget Sarah. I don’t know if that’s good or bad. What a story, River Dixon is a master.

☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

[Victoria Ray · Rating 5 out of 5]

Haunting, frightening, and spooky! Enjoyed reading, a great addition to the pulp collection! Awesome gift to the fans of all horrific and scary!

[Diane · Rating 5 out of 5]

The cover certainly pulled me into the book straight away and the contents grabbed me tightly by the throat and didn't let go!!
Sarah was painfully haunted by her childhood which was full of abuse and the "lessons" her Grandmother taught her!!
This was a very dark and disturbing read...But I couldn't put it down.
It's a sordid journey of brutality, violence and psychotic moments that are shocking and unforgiving.

Highly Recommended if you like Dark Horror.

5 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟's For An Awesome Read And For Those Blue, Green & Brown Eyes 👁️👁️👁️ YUK!!

[Chris Nelson · Rating 4 out of 5]

An unsettling tale...

The Smell of Cedar is an unsettling and unnerving psychological horror story made all the more believable by its backstory of abuse and control. For me the length is just right, with moments of reflection which help to not only explain the lead character's past but also move the story along at a good pace.
River's use of a nonlinear structure is both effective and skillfully employed and his careful use of description allows the reader to create a vivid scene whilst reading the story. At times I was not certain as to whether tense changes worked quite as effectively as they might have, but this is a minor issue and I am being, perhaps,  a little pedantic.
I do think, however, that the actions of the character Melanie, to whom we are introduced early on in the story, and which become clearer as the tale develops, add to the chilling (and all too real) possibility of history repeating itself. 
If you enjoy short, chilling and disturbing stories, then I would certainly recommend reading this.

[Dawn Shea · Rating 5 out of 5]

Creepy, freaky and disturbing. River always knows right how to hit me in the feels. Mentally disturbing, grotesque imagery and enough gore to keep the bloodhounds at bay. Another book that took a page from “how are human monsters made” handbook. Well done! Definitely recommend.

[Fionnuala Black · Rating 5 out of 5]

A disturbingly good read

This is a chilling read, portraying the descent into insanity in brutal detail. I knew River Dixon as a talented poet but he takes his game to a whole new level with this superb novella. Highly recommended.

[Sabina Carrara · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read it in just a few days and not because is a short story but because the book is “unputdownable”
If you like fast pace thriller with surprising twists and a grand finale you couldn’t see coming , then “ the kindness of psychopaths” is a must read.

[Deborah Linne · Rating 4 out of 5]

Horrifying. I didn't want to keep reading but was compelled to keep turning the pages.

[Michael · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5

This was a wild psychological story with a few body horror scenes sprinkled in. The synopsis does not do this book justice. It’s much more than Sarah piecing together her last few months, but her entire life.

The writing was fantastic—one of the best I’ve read from either independent authors or small-time publishers.

Clever and enjoyable, but one or two things felt unaddressed, hence the 4.5 baldies and not a full 5.