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The Way Forward: Master Life's Toughest Battles and Create Your Lasting Legacy
American Sniper meets Make Your Bed in these life lessons from decorated United States service members and New York Times bestselling authors Robert O’Neill and Dakota Meyer—an in-depth, fearless, and ultimately redemptive account of what it takes to survive and thrive on battlefields from Afghanistan and Iraq to our daily lives, and how the perils of war help us hold onto our humanity.
Rob O’Neill and Dakota Meyer are two of the most decorated and recognized US service members: O’Neill killed the world’s most wanted man, Osama bin Laden, and Meyer was the first living Marine to receive the Medal of Honor since the Vietnam War. But beyond their actions and courage in combat, O’Neill and Meyer also have much in common in civilian life: they are both sought-after public speakers, advocates for veterans, and share a non-PC sense of humor. Combining the best of military memoirs and straight-talking self-help, The Way Forward alternates between O’Neill’s and Meyer’s perspectives, looking back with humor at even the darkest war stories, and sharing lessons they learned along the way.
The Way Forward presents O’Neill and Meyer’s philosophy in combat and life. This isn’t a book about the glory of war and combat, but one about facing your enemies, some who are flesh and blood and some that are not: Your thoughts. Your doubts. Your boredom and your regrets. From Rob’s dogged repetition at the free throw line of his childhood basketball court to Dakota’s pursuit of EMT and firefighter credentials to aid accident victims, these two American heroes turn their experiences into valuable lessons for every reader.
Gritty and down-to-earth, O’Neill and Meyer tell their stories with candor and vulnerability to help readers handle stress, tackle their biggest obstacles, and exceed their expectations of themselves, while keeping life’s battles in perspective with a sense of humor.
Rob O’Neill and Dakota Meyer are two of the most decorated and recognized US service members: O’Neill killed the world’s most wanted man, Osama bin Laden, and Meyer was the first living Marine to receive the Medal of Honor since the Vietnam War. But beyond their actions and courage in combat, O’Neill and Meyer also have much in common in civilian life: they are both sought-after public speakers, advocates for veterans, and share a non-PC sense of humor. Combining the best of military memoirs and straight-talking self-help, The Way Forward alternates between O’Neill’s and Meyer’s perspectives, looking back with humor at even the darkest war stories, and sharing lessons they learned along the way.
The Way Forward presents O’Neill and Meyer’s philosophy in combat and life. This isn’t a book about the glory of war and combat, but one about facing your enemies, some who are flesh and blood and some that are not: Your thoughts. Your doubts. Your boredom and your regrets. From Rob’s dogged repetition at the free throw line of his childhood basketball court to Dakota’s pursuit of EMT and firefighter credentials to aid accident victims, these two American heroes turn their experiences into valuable lessons for every reader.
Gritty and down-to-earth, O’Neill and Meyer tell their stories with candor and vulnerability to help readers handle stress, tackle their biggest obstacles, and exceed their expectations of themselves, while keeping life’s battles in perspective with a sense of humor.
288 pages, Hardcover
Published March 1, 2022
128 people are currently reading
1994 people want to read
About the author
Robert O'Neill
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 36 reviews
April 29, 2023
A well written book about the difficulties of military life and adjusting to the civilian world. Would have liked it more if there was less profanity used.
March 1, 2023
Well Written I gave it 4 Stars for a reason not 5!
I read it in two days as it’s a very easy read & I like that they both distinguished between each other’s chapters and yet played off each other with similar experiences just in different ways.
I never knew who Dakota Meyer was but now I do!
I have empathy for him in many ways from the time he was born to his upbringing to his war experiences and the aftermath that engulfed him. He is truly a Hero!
Rob O’Neill I’ve followed for some time and I had a huge respect for him up until half way through this book!
Let’s just say he was always in the right place at the right time! I mean 400 missions and never a scratch on him!
While he definitely earned becoming a Navy SEAL and made good decisions as a team leader, it could have been anyone else on Six to kill UBL..someone had to take the shot! It happened to be NSRO..at the right place at the right time! Congrats to him! It changed his life and made him America’s Hero!
As to the latter half of the book…RJO should have taken his own advice “never pass up an opportunity to shut up” stop talking too much” especially when it comes to politics!
He did push a political agenda speaking about three presidents in the book and his “personal opinion” about each of them. He says he’s neither democrat or Republican but just an American. His words will tell you otherwise!
My advice to this young man “Divided We Fall” and America is certainly divided! Choose your side “good or bad” you cannot have it both ways! Otherwise … your the
Bad Guy you fought so hard to kill!
I read it in two days as it’s a very easy read & I like that they both distinguished between each other’s chapters and yet played off each other with similar experiences just in different ways.
I never knew who Dakota Meyer was but now I do!
I have empathy for him in many ways from the time he was born to his upbringing to his war experiences and the aftermath that engulfed him. He is truly a Hero!
Rob O’Neill I’ve followed for some time and I had a huge respect for him up until half way through this book!
Let’s just say he was always in the right place at the right time! I mean 400 missions and never a scratch on him!
While he definitely earned becoming a Navy SEAL and made good decisions as a team leader, it could have been anyone else on Six to kill UBL..someone had to take the shot! It happened to be NSRO..at the right place at the right time! Congrats to him! It changed his life and made him America’s Hero!
As to the latter half of the book…RJO should have taken his own advice “never pass up an opportunity to shut up” stop talking too much” especially when it comes to politics!
He did push a political agenda speaking about three presidents in the book and his “personal opinion” about each of them. He says he’s neither democrat or Republican but just an American. His words will tell you otherwise!
My advice to this young man “Divided We Fall” and America is certainly divided! Choose your side “good or bad” you cannot have it both ways! Otherwise … your the
Bad Guy you fought so hard to kill!
May 13, 2022
This book wasn't really about mastering life's toughest battles as much as it was a split biography of Robert O'Neill and Dakota Meyer mastering their own battles. It's not 5% as good as "Can't Hurt Me" by David Goggins which, in addition to being a much better story, actually has plans for self-improvement.
March 5, 2023
Two American heroes tell their stories s about surfing combat and use the lessons learned to persevere in life. I highly recommend this book.
Read
July 1, 2022There are a few takeaways from this book. The first is the importance of free throws. It might take time, but constant repetition is the surest route to mastery. Next up is the difference between panic and fear. Avoid the former, and embrace the latter. It just might save your life one day. Finally, don’t forget that while rules are often made in good faith, they can end up overserving their purpose. So don’t shy away from breaking them if you feel it’s necessary.
---
Endless repetition is the secret behind mastering the basics of any skill.
When you get famous, people begin to ask certain questions: How’d you get where you are? How can I be more like you? What’s your secret? It was no different with Rob. Ever since the public learned that it was him who fired the bullet that killed America’s most wanted man, he gets asked these questions all the time. How’d you become such a good shot, people often want to know. Fans even ask him about the secret to his happy marriage. Luckily, over the years, he’s figured out a great answer: free throws.
It sounds crazy, but that’s kind of the point, because this nonsensical answer leads to people inquiring further. What do “free throws” have to do with his success in life? It’s then that Rob launches into explaining one of his core principles – the importance of mastering the basics.
Rob learned this long before he was a Navy SEAL. As a kid, he spent hours with his dad at the local gym shooting hoops. To help him get better, Rob’s dad implemented a rule. Before they could go home, one of them would have to shoot twenty free throws in a row. If neither managed to do it, they’d keep going – even if it meant missing dinner. The more tired they got, the worse they shot. But they kept going, no matter what.
As Rob got better, they raised the stakes. Once, this even involved steak – no pun intended. If they kept the free throws going until they got to 25, the reward was a steak dinner at a local restaurant. As time went on, the endless repetition led to better and better results. One day, Rob’s dad set a family record of 91 free throws in a row! But it was only six days later that Rob beat that with 105. Thousands of shots turned into tens of thousands. Rob eventually got so good at basketball that he landed a place at Montana Tech, where he continued playing his favorite sport on the college team.
Without those free throws, Rob wouldn’t be where he is today. That’s because at a young age, he learned the importance of endlessly repeating the basics to get good at something. And at the end of the day, this principle doesn’t just work for sports. If you want to get good or even great at something you love, you need to accept that you won’t get there overnight. You’ll need to be disciplined and put in the hard work. You’ll have to accept the necessity of endless repetition. Although it might take months or even years, at some point the basics of the skill will become second nature.
For Rob, it turned out that basketball wasn’t his calling. But he’s applied the lessons he learned on the court to all other areas of life. In his military career, this meant countless hours at the shooting range, and braving the seemingly endless drills involved in becoming a Navy SEAL. It’s this endless drive and dedication that later led to him being awarded America’s highest military decoration – the Medal of Honor.
---
There’s an important difference between fear and panic.
Now, while endless repetition will take a person pretty far, Rob has other attributes that have helped him get where he is today. After all, being a Navy SEAL is more than just sharpshooting – SEALs are legendary for their toughness and their endurance in even the most grueling circumstances.
But Rob thinks another, lesser-known skill that Navy SEALs practice is even more important. That’s the ability to stay calm and avoid panicking no matter the situation. A perfect example of this is a drill he experienced during boot camp; after the fact, he learned that it was meant to simulate combat during a shipwreck. If an enemy managed to strike a SEAL ship, how would the crew react? Would they survive while floating in the ocean among complete chaos?
At the time of the drill, however, none of the recruits were aware of its purpose. The instructors ordered the whole squad to jump fully-clothed into a 15-foot deep pool. There was barely any room to swim, but the instructors kept pushing the squad together nonetheless. Some began to sink, unable to tread water because of the lack of space. When they did manage to get their heads above water, to gasp for air, the instructors pushed them back under.
Slowly, squad members began to panic. Some grabbed onto others to try to stay afloat, and of course this only resulted in both being dragged down into the depths. Meanwhile, the instructors were screaming contradictory orders at them: Find your crewmates! Move away from your crewmates! Keep your head above the water! Get underwater! And so on. Those who panicked or didn’t obey failed the drill.
It’s through drills like these that SEALs are conditioned to not panic even in the worst of situations. Because all it takes to get the whole squad killed is one SEAL panicking. Panic spreads like wildfire, and can cause entire groups to react irrationally very quickly.
Now, it’s important to make a distinction between panic and fear. Panic is something you should avoid. But fear? Often, fear is something you should embrace. In fact, fear is a natural, healthy human instinct. It provides you with adrenaline and helps you make judgment calls in fight-or-flight situations. In SEAL terms, fear is known as a “heightened sense of awareness.” While panicking is dangerous, fear is necessary in order to stay alive.
Rob believes that that distinction is an important lesson that others can learn from SEAL training. Life often throws you into unpredictable situations, and it’s important that you react in a rational way. If you panic, it’s likely you’ll make irrational decisions, so instead, always try to stay as calm as possible. In situations that aren’t life or death, panic is still contagious. Even when you’re alone, panic grows exponentially – the only difference is that you have to bear the weight by yourself.
So remember: however bad a situation seems, don’t panic. At the same time, don’t forget that there’s also danger in being too calm all the time. Complacency can actually be just as dangerous as panic – if you let your guard down, it’s much more likely you’ll make serious mistakes. And whether you’re a soldier, construction worker, or doctor, mistakes can have serious consequences.
Rob nearly learned the dangers of complacency the hard way. While serving in Iraq, he was part of a platoon that conducted regular night raids against insurgents. At first, their strategy was to fly directly to the target building in helicopters. This, of course, alerted whole neighborhoods to their presence. They then bombed their way into buildings and took out insurgents with brute force.
The problem with this strategy was that they became easy targets for insurgents to repel. Either that, or the helicopters approaching gave the insurgents enough of a warning that they had time to escape. So the platoon decided to adopt a more stealthy approach, landing out of earshot so the insurgents had no idea they were coming. And instead of blowing up doors to get into houses, they’d gain entry through quieter means, reducing the chance of enemies escaping.
These stealthier methods had a big downside, however – it took much more time and effort to conduct the raids, and night after night, they’d show up at target houses and find no insurgents there.
At this point, Rob’s team started sliding into complacency. Why not just go back to the old ways, they thought? They might have been louder, but at least they could get back to base in time to catch the evening mess and play some Xbox. After all, it didn’t seem to make a difference if they went in loud or not – the insurgents weren’t there either way.
But when they went back to their old ways during the next night raid, their complacency almost got them killed. That night, the enemy opened fire even before their helicopter touched down, and it was a miracle that none of Rob’s team got hit. Their desire to play Xbox nearly cost them their lives. Remember, fear isn’t panic; it’s a healthy, “heightened sense of awareness,” one that can keep you alive, and it’s a far cry from complacency. By leaving their fear back at the base, the SEALs had endangered their own lives.
Although they successfully eliminated their target that night, the experience shocked Rob out of his complacency. From then on out, stealth raids were the platoon’s preferred mode of engagement.
---
When it comes to mental health, you have to pull yourself up by your own bootstraps.
So far, we’ve seen that there are a number of important principles anyone can learn from elite soldiers like Rob and Dakota. Their tours of duty led them to confronting some of life’s most difficult questions, and at some points they weren’t even sure if they’d make it out alive. But while both survived the horrors of war and lived to tell the tale, they didn’t come out totally unscathed.
Like countless soldiers before them, after returning home, they both developed post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD. The things they saw while serving their country were truly horrific, and when they returned home, they were haunted by their memories of war. They’d become numb to death and killing, and both developed substance abuse issues.
For Rob, the worst part of all of this is that the government department in charge of veterans’ health wasn’t able to diagnose his PTSD, let alone treat it. This infamous bureaucratic machine is the Department of Veterans Affairs, or the VA for short. Although Rob had conducted 400 missions and witnessed unspeakable acts of violence, he didn’t receive a single mental health evaluation when he returned stateside.
Like many other veterans, Rob’s experiences with the VA have themselves been trauma-inducing. He doesn’t doubt that individual doctors and nurses care about the veterans they’re tasked with helping. But because of careerist VA administrators who don’t care about the military, a lot of veterans don’t even get to see the doctors. And if they do, it’s sometimes too late – suicide rates among veterans are much higher than those of the general population.
From 2016 to 2020, Rob’s local VA Medical Center in Washington, DC, fired three medical directors. Among the reasons given were shortages of medical equipment and doctors having to work in less-than-sterile conditions. These sorts of problems put patients’ lives at risk, and can compound existing health problems rather than help veterans recover.
After a series of negative experiences at the center, Rob realized that government-run healthcare was not going to help him get better. To recover from his PTSD and alcoholism, he instead sought out a private clinic offering experimental PTSD treatment. Although the treatment used the illegal drug MDMA, commonly known as ecstasy, he decided it was worth a try. MDMA is now being used to treat PTSD in clinical trials across America, and so far, it’s been remarkably successful. However, this clinic wasn’t taking part in those clinical trials – its use of MDMA was illegal. Rob decided to go for it anyway; after all, sometimes you have to break rules that go against common sense, right?
It turns out that the drug was the miracle Rob was looking for. After the very first treatment, he felt a sense of peace that he hadn’t experienced in years. The drug helped him come to terms with the horrible things he’d been forced to confront while serving his country. And the cure wasn’t just short-term, either. To this day, he still feels much better.
Rob believes that MDMA and similar novel treatments should be made more easily available. Legal, clinical trials still remain hard for most Americans suffering from trauma-related mental illness to access. However, with a little less bureaucracy, countless Americans could be benefitting from such treatments in the near future. Whether veterans or civilians, mental illness is a growing scourge in American society. Rob firmly believes that the government should not get in the way of people being able to access these revolutionary treatments.
---
Endless repetition is the secret behind mastering the basics of any skill.
When you get famous, people begin to ask certain questions: How’d you get where you are? How can I be more like you? What’s your secret? It was no different with Rob. Ever since the public learned that it was him who fired the bullet that killed America’s most wanted man, he gets asked these questions all the time. How’d you become such a good shot, people often want to know. Fans even ask him about the secret to his happy marriage. Luckily, over the years, he’s figured out a great answer: free throws.
It sounds crazy, but that’s kind of the point, because this nonsensical answer leads to people inquiring further. What do “free throws” have to do with his success in life? It’s then that Rob launches into explaining one of his core principles – the importance of mastering the basics.
Rob learned this long before he was a Navy SEAL. As a kid, he spent hours with his dad at the local gym shooting hoops. To help him get better, Rob’s dad implemented a rule. Before they could go home, one of them would have to shoot twenty free throws in a row. If neither managed to do it, they’d keep going – even if it meant missing dinner. The more tired they got, the worse they shot. But they kept going, no matter what.
As Rob got better, they raised the stakes. Once, this even involved steak – no pun intended. If they kept the free throws going until they got to 25, the reward was a steak dinner at a local restaurant. As time went on, the endless repetition led to better and better results. One day, Rob’s dad set a family record of 91 free throws in a row! But it was only six days later that Rob beat that with 105. Thousands of shots turned into tens of thousands. Rob eventually got so good at basketball that he landed a place at Montana Tech, where he continued playing his favorite sport on the college team.
Without those free throws, Rob wouldn’t be where he is today. That’s because at a young age, he learned the importance of endlessly repeating the basics to get good at something. And at the end of the day, this principle doesn’t just work for sports. If you want to get good or even great at something you love, you need to accept that you won’t get there overnight. You’ll need to be disciplined and put in the hard work. You’ll have to accept the necessity of endless repetition. Although it might take months or even years, at some point the basics of the skill will become second nature.
For Rob, it turned out that basketball wasn’t his calling. But he’s applied the lessons he learned on the court to all other areas of life. In his military career, this meant countless hours at the shooting range, and braving the seemingly endless drills involved in becoming a Navy SEAL. It’s this endless drive and dedication that later led to him being awarded America’s highest military decoration – the Medal of Honor.
---
There’s an important difference between fear and panic.
Now, while endless repetition will take a person pretty far, Rob has other attributes that have helped him get where he is today. After all, being a Navy SEAL is more than just sharpshooting – SEALs are legendary for their toughness and their endurance in even the most grueling circumstances.
But Rob thinks another, lesser-known skill that Navy SEALs practice is even more important. That’s the ability to stay calm and avoid panicking no matter the situation. A perfect example of this is a drill he experienced during boot camp; after the fact, he learned that it was meant to simulate combat during a shipwreck. If an enemy managed to strike a SEAL ship, how would the crew react? Would they survive while floating in the ocean among complete chaos?
At the time of the drill, however, none of the recruits were aware of its purpose. The instructors ordered the whole squad to jump fully-clothed into a 15-foot deep pool. There was barely any room to swim, but the instructors kept pushing the squad together nonetheless. Some began to sink, unable to tread water because of the lack of space. When they did manage to get their heads above water, to gasp for air, the instructors pushed them back under.
Slowly, squad members began to panic. Some grabbed onto others to try to stay afloat, and of course this only resulted in both being dragged down into the depths. Meanwhile, the instructors were screaming contradictory orders at them: Find your crewmates! Move away from your crewmates! Keep your head above the water! Get underwater! And so on. Those who panicked or didn’t obey failed the drill.
It’s through drills like these that SEALs are conditioned to not panic even in the worst of situations. Because all it takes to get the whole squad killed is one SEAL panicking. Panic spreads like wildfire, and can cause entire groups to react irrationally very quickly.
Now, it’s important to make a distinction between panic and fear. Panic is something you should avoid. But fear? Often, fear is something you should embrace. In fact, fear is a natural, healthy human instinct. It provides you with adrenaline and helps you make judgment calls in fight-or-flight situations. In SEAL terms, fear is known as a “heightened sense of awareness.” While panicking is dangerous, fear is necessary in order to stay alive.
Rob believes that that distinction is an important lesson that others can learn from SEAL training. Life often throws you into unpredictable situations, and it’s important that you react in a rational way. If you panic, it’s likely you’ll make irrational decisions, so instead, always try to stay as calm as possible. In situations that aren’t life or death, panic is still contagious. Even when you’re alone, panic grows exponentially – the only difference is that you have to bear the weight by yourself.
So remember: however bad a situation seems, don’t panic. At the same time, don’t forget that there’s also danger in being too calm all the time. Complacency can actually be just as dangerous as panic – if you let your guard down, it’s much more likely you’ll make serious mistakes. And whether you’re a soldier, construction worker, or doctor, mistakes can have serious consequences.
Rob nearly learned the dangers of complacency the hard way. While serving in Iraq, he was part of a platoon that conducted regular night raids against insurgents. At first, their strategy was to fly directly to the target building in helicopters. This, of course, alerted whole neighborhoods to their presence. They then bombed their way into buildings and took out insurgents with brute force.
The problem with this strategy was that they became easy targets for insurgents to repel. Either that, or the helicopters approaching gave the insurgents enough of a warning that they had time to escape. So the platoon decided to adopt a more stealthy approach, landing out of earshot so the insurgents had no idea they were coming. And instead of blowing up doors to get into houses, they’d gain entry through quieter means, reducing the chance of enemies escaping.
These stealthier methods had a big downside, however – it took much more time and effort to conduct the raids, and night after night, they’d show up at target houses and find no insurgents there.
At this point, Rob’s team started sliding into complacency. Why not just go back to the old ways, they thought? They might have been louder, but at least they could get back to base in time to catch the evening mess and play some Xbox. After all, it didn’t seem to make a difference if they went in loud or not – the insurgents weren’t there either way.
But when they went back to their old ways during the next night raid, their complacency almost got them killed. That night, the enemy opened fire even before their helicopter touched down, and it was a miracle that none of Rob’s team got hit. Their desire to play Xbox nearly cost them their lives. Remember, fear isn’t panic; it’s a healthy, “heightened sense of awareness,” one that can keep you alive, and it’s a far cry from complacency. By leaving their fear back at the base, the SEALs had endangered their own lives.
Although they successfully eliminated their target that night, the experience shocked Rob out of his complacency. From then on out, stealth raids were the platoon’s preferred mode of engagement.
---
When it comes to mental health, you have to pull yourself up by your own bootstraps.
So far, we’ve seen that there are a number of important principles anyone can learn from elite soldiers like Rob and Dakota. Their tours of duty led them to confronting some of life’s most difficult questions, and at some points they weren’t even sure if they’d make it out alive. But while both survived the horrors of war and lived to tell the tale, they didn’t come out totally unscathed.
Like countless soldiers before them, after returning home, they both developed post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD. The things they saw while serving their country were truly horrific, and when they returned home, they were haunted by their memories of war. They’d become numb to death and killing, and both developed substance abuse issues.
For Rob, the worst part of all of this is that the government department in charge of veterans’ health wasn’t able to diagnose his PTSD, let alone treat it. This infamous bureaucratic machine is the Department of Veterans Affairs, or the VA for short. Although Rob had conducted 400 missions and witnessed unspeakable acts of violence, he didn’t receive a single mental health evaluation when he returned stateside.
Like many other veterans, Rob’s experiences with the VA have themselves been trauma-inducing. He doesn’t doubt that individual doctors and nurses care about the veterans they’re tasked with helping. But because of careerist VA administrators who don’t care about the military, a lot of veterans don’t even get to see the doctors. And if they do, it’s sometimes too late – suicide rates among veterans are much higher than those of the general population.
From 2016 to 2020, Rob’s local VA Medical Center in Washington, DC, fired three medical directors. Among the reasons given were shortages of medical equipment and doctors having to work in less-than-sterile conditions. These sorts of problems put patients’ lives at risk, and can compound existing health problems rather than help veterans recover.
After a series of negative experiences at the center, Rob realized that government-run healthcare was not going to help him get better. To recover from his PTSD and alcoholism, he instead sought out a private clinic offering experimental PTSD treatment. Although the treatment used the illegal drug MDMA, commonly known as ecstasy, he decided it was worth a try. MDMA is now being used to treat PTSD in clinical trials across America, and so far, it’s been remarkably successful. However, this clinic wasn’t taking part in those clinical trials – its use of MDMA was illegal. Rob decided to go for it anyway; after all, sometimes you have to break rules that go against common sense, right?
It turns out that the drug was the miracle Rob was looking for. After the very first treatment, he felt a sense of peace that he hadn’t experienced in years. The drug helped him come to terms with the horrible things he’d been forced to confront while serving his country. And the cure wasn’t just short-term, either. To this day, he still feels much better.
Rob believes that MDMA and similar novel treatments should be made more easily available. Legal, clinical trials still remain hard for most Americans suffering from trauma-related mental illness to access. However, with a little less bureaucracy, countless Americans could be benefitting from such treatments in the near future. Whether veterans or civilians, mental illness is a growing scourge in American society. Rob firmly believes that the government should not get in the way of people being able to access these revolutionary treatments.
May 18, 2025
What began as an inspiring and uplifting account of two heroic men became a political based whimper, I did not like the sour grapes.
March 28, 2022
After reading this, following Extreme Ownership (I recommend), this fell flat and is a poor attempt at riding the coat tails of the aforementioned, unfortunately without much added insight.
February 12, 2025
I definitely was not the target audience for this book. As a middle aged, chubby, liberal woman a book written by two highly decorated, ex-military men should not have popped on my radar. But facing life after my second divorce, where I had to leave my whole life behind to finally escape an abusive relationship, the title jumped out at me as I perused the books in my local library.
Although not every life lesson resonated with me personally, I did find myself enjoying the stories and wisdom imparted from the tales of the authors childhoods, the decisions that led them to military service, the struggles of military life, and the difficulties faced by our veterans post service.
I appreciated the honesty in blasting the VA for the abhorrent way our Vets are treated and for both of them sharing how psychedelics helped with their PTSD.
The only part of the book the didn’t really resonate was their reaction to the praise and “fame” that came due to their military action. One author shot Bin Laden and the other is the first living Marine in 40 years to win the Medal of Honor. Both of them write with disdain about the events that lead to their recognition and the recognition itself. This isn’t meant in any way to be an invalidation of their experiences or the difficulty that has come from their military service, however, both have capitalized on their experiences with book deals and paid speaking engagements. The lack of balance, with no seeming acknowledgment for how these experiences have also given them a way to financially take care of themselves and their families,makes some of the virtue “hard sells “ a little tough to swallow. It appears to be a big lack of self awareness, especially when so many Vets with similar experiences struggle to find work post service. Maybe I just don’t get stoicism.
However, overall, I found value in the book and think it would be a great read for many men, especially active duty military and veterans, to help them through navigating the difficult paths that come with service to this country.
Although not every life lesson resonated with me personally, I did find myself enjoying the stories and wisdom imparted from the tales of the authors childhoods, the decisions that led them to military service, the struggles of military life, and the difficulties faced by our veterans post service.
I appreciated the honesty in blasting the VA for the abhorrent way our Vets are treated and for both of them sharing how psychedelics helped with their PTSD.
The only part of the book the didn’t really resonate was their reaction to the praise and “fame” that came due to their military action. One author shot Bin Laden and the other is the first living Marine in 40 years to win the Medal of Honor. Both of them write with disdain about the events that lead to their recognition and the recognition itself. This isn’t meant in any way to be an invalidation of their experiences or the difficulty that has come from their military service, however, both have capitalized on their experiences with book deals and paid speaking engagements. The lack of balance, with no seeming acknowledgment for how these experiences have also given them a way to financially take care of themselves and their families,makes some of the virtue “hard sells “ a little tough to swallow. It appears to be a big lack of self awareness, especially when so many Vets with similar experiences struggle to find work post service. Maybe I just don’t get stoicism.
However, overall, I found value in the book and think it would be a great read for many men, especially active duty military and veterans, to help them through navigating the difficult paths that come with service to this country.
October 17, 2025
A Journey of Brotherhood and Purpose.
The Way Forward is more than a war memoir, it’s a unfiltered look into the minds of two elite warriors grappling with life after combat. Robert O’Neill and Dakota Meyer, both decorated veterans, trade battlefield stories for hard-earned wisdom, offering readers a front-row seat to the emotional aftermath of the service.
What sets this book apart is its dual narrative. O’Neill’s Navy SEAL missions and Meyer’s Marine Corps experiences are woven together with honesty and humility. They don’t glorify war, they dissect it. From the adrenaline of combat to the quiet battles with PTSD, both authors explore what it means to live with purpose when the mission ends.
The writing is direct and unapologetic, but also surprisingly introspective. It is a book for anyone seeking resilience, leadership lessons, or a deeper understanding of the sacrifices behind the uniform.
Major takeaway: “You don’t need a battlefield to be brave. You just need a reason.”
The Way Forward is more than a war memoir, it’s a unfiltered look into the minds of two elite warriors grappling with life after combat. Robert O’Neill and Dakota Meyer, both decorated veterans, trade battlefield stories for hard-earned wisdom, offering readers a front-row seat to the emotional aftermath of the service.
What sets this book apart is its dual narrative. O’Neill’s Navy SEAL missions and Meyer’s Marine Corps experiences are woven together with honesty and humility. They don’t glorify war, they dissect it. From the adrenaline of combat to the quiet battles with PTSD, both authors explore what it means to live with purpose when the mission ends.
The writing is direct and unapologetic, but also surprisingly introspective. It is a book for anyone seeking resilience, leadership lessons, or a deeper understanding of the sacrifices behind the uniform.
Major takeaway: “You don’t need a battlefield to be brave. You just need a reason.”
July 7, 2022
I fully appreciate, respect, and honor what these two heroes have done for us all. Their stories are inspiring. The stories of their training, missions, and experience taught me more about these military men than I'd ever realized from other sources.
For whatever reason, however, I had expected more insight into how to use their experiences to help move forward in various areas. There is scant correlation to what they have gone through to how others might implement their experiences. Not everyone has the financial resources (rightfully earned!) available to them that these heroes have from speaking tours or other sources and I think perhaps that is where I was a bit disappointed. There is not the strongest empathy with others who may be struggling with similar problems.
For whatever reason, however, I had expected more insight into how to use their experiences to help move forward in various areas. There is scant correlation to what they have gone through to how others might implement their experiences. Not everyone has the financial resources (rightfully earned!) available to them that these heroes have from speaking tours or other sources and I think perhaps that is where I was a bit disappointed. There is not the strongest empathy with others who may be struggling with similar problems.
March 18, 2023
Interesting read. It is a biography by and about the authors. It's their stories from prior to High School into enlistments into the Navy and Marines. Training for their particular jobs. One as a Seal with a quick review of BUD/S and other as a sniper. O'Neil killed Bin Ladin and Meyer was awarded the Medal of Honor for action in Afghanistan. Their info talks about a number of missions that they took part in. The remainder of the book talks about the struggles they've encountered since they left the service. Both were considered to have PTSD's and how they've grown out of it. They also talk about the struggles encountered with the VA while seeking help. Both are doing better these days but it sounds as though it's a daily struggle.
January 27, 2023
I have the utmost respect and admiration for both these men. Real life superheroes. A fantastic book filled with incredible stories! This isn’t necessarily a “life-lesson” book but more of a autobiography of different events taking place in each of the authors lives and what they learned from overcoming those events.
It was sometimes hard to understand the actual message each author was trying to get across at the end of each chapter. While I enjoyed tremendously reading from each individual author, I personally didn’t feel they wrote well together. The writing styles were very different, almost to the point where it could have been two books bound in one.
It was sometimes hard to understand the actual message each author was trying to get across at the end of each chapter. While I enjoyed tremendously reading from each individual author, I personally didn’t feel they wrote well together. The writing styles were very different, almost to the point where it could have been two books bound in one.
January 12, 2024
Couldn't wait to finish this book. Only to say I'd read it. Found most of the profanity unnecessary. The alternating stories made me feel that neither alone would have been worth a book in itself. Some stories were interesting, but overall, it felt more like a bunch of stories than a book. Really not what I was expecting. Then again I usually find I like biographies more than autobiographies.
March 24, 2022
Not exactly what I was expecting. The lead ups to the different lessons where a bit long, and flowed a bit more like military reminiscing. These experiences though, coming from author's who exemplify service to their country, and service to their teammates can only help show the reality of people who endure such things.
August 14, 2024
I really, really wanted to like this book after reading all of the reviews but it read like two guys who didn't want to ever be in the public spotlight, wrote a book to be in the public spotlight. Some of it just got absolutely annoying at times. I'd recommend Lone Survivor with Marcus Luttrell or Scars and Stripes by Tim Kennedy.
July 9, 2025
Not a bad book, just not my style. The stories themselves were good, but the back and forth format made it hard for me to stay engaged. One chapter would follow Rob, then the next would shift to Dakota, and that constant switching just didn’t work for me personally. If you like that kind of structure, you might enjoy it more but it wasn’t a great fit for me.
April 18, 2022
Definitely written for a specific niche audience (I.e. military). I found all the examples really long and drawn out without a concrete BLUF (bottom line up front) or firm advice. I didn’t learn how to master my challenges but I did learn more about the authors.
December 26, 2022
Excellent book by two hero veterans. The war, struggles, bureaucracy, tragedies, and improvements in their lives and dealing with it all. I've read Dakota's "Into the Fire" & Rob's "The Operator" which were great books too.
May 9, 2023
(4) The book instills critical thinking and leadership, especially one that may challenge rules that are generally obeyed without question for the greater good and protection of oneself and the immediate surrounding of people.
May 19, 2025
Note- audible version.
The chapters go back and forth between Rob and Dakota.
I really enjoyed the Rob O’Neil chapters but I struggled a little with the Dakota chapters(his stories weren’t that good).
Altogether an easy listen/read.
The chapters go back and forth between Rob and Dakota.
I really enjoyed the Rob O’Neil chapters but I struggled a little with the Dakota chapters(his stories weren’t that good).
Altogether an easy listen/read.
March 23, 2022
This book is amazing. One of the best I’ve read in a long time.
April 1, 2022
Excellent! I love these stories.
May 8, 2022
A fine bunch of military memoirs and lessons, but if you're interested in Rob and Dakota's stories, you may have already heard all this on YouTube.
July 8, 2022
I enjoyed the book.
August 11, 2022
Audible version. Great narration. Incoherent set of rules but the stories were impactful.
August 17, 2022
⭐️⭐️⭐️: Two similar tales of courage, resilience and the importance of continuing to move forward even when the going gets tough.
November 18, 2022
I read this book after hearing O'Neill in an interview. The book was good but he's a much better story teller
December 22, 2023
OK read some of the stories are the same ones from O'Neill's first book.
December 15, 2024
Very very good. I loved this book and the account of these two war heroes. Thank you for your service Rob and Dakota!!!
July 26, 2025
Heroes
True stories told by the heroes who lived through hell.
Thank You
True stories told by the heroes who lived through hell.
Thank You
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