Babies Don't Make Small Talk (So Why Should I?): The Introvert's Guide to Surviving Parenthood

by Julie Vick

A baby can be a good excuse to skip a party, but . . . goodbye alone time, hello awkward new social obligations. All parents want the same to balance work and home life, to raise happy kids, to never attend a baby drumming class, and to build a secret room in their home where they can hide (preferably not the bathroom). Yes, an introverted parent would more keenly want to be free of the slew of attention and expectations that accompany both pregnancy and parenthood, but even the most outgoing person is sure to reach their limit eventually. Here, with laugh-out-loud humor and well-earned experience, Julie Vick offers coping mechanisms for everything from sharing the news that you are becoming a parent to the moment the baby is born (one way or another, it will happen), from managing doctor’s visits to handling playdates. She offers advice on finding childcare and ignoring the nursing versus formula conversation with strangers. Witty yet valuable, her tips, checklists, and the occasional chart focus on the time from pregnancy through preschool.

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction, Self Help, Humor, Adult, Family

208 pages, Hardcover

Published August 10, 2021

About the author

Julie Vick is the author of Babies Don’t Make Small Talk (So Why Should I?), a humorous advice book for introverted parents navigating the early years of parenthood. She has written for New Yorker Daily Shouts, Parents magazine, Real Simple, and McSweeney’s Internet Tendency; and most importantly, one of her tweets once appeared in In Touch Weekly.

Reviews

[Myriam · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed reading Babies Don't Make Small Talk. As an introvert I related to a lot of what Julie wrote. There were plenty of laugh out loud moments and lots of "m-hmm yup" moments too. It's a refreshing and entertaining spin on parenting books, and Julie's humour shines through. I definitely recommend it.

[Zibby Owens · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book takes a different angle on parenting advice. It talks about the parenting struggles we face if we are introverts and constantly being thrown into social situations just because we're trying to socialize a child. The book offers advice on finding childcare and ignoring lousy parenting advice. It also includes funny tips, checklists, and charts that help with the time from pregnancy through preschool.

This book is one of the smartest and funniest books that I have read about parenting with an almost tongue-in-cheek sense of humor. Every chapter was refreshing because it talked about how to parent when you don't gravitate towards playdates and mom outings. The chapter on"I Might Actually Be Here to Make Friends: Finding Parent Friends" talks about how to call a stranger to ask about childcare. It also discusses the problems with common advice from other parents and includes a chart of thirty totally ridiculous reasons why your baby isn't sleeping. This helps us understand a different kind of parenting not discussed often enough.

To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at:
https://zibbyowens.com/transcript/jul...

[Lisa Lewis · Rating 5 out of 5]

The perfect blend of humor and advice for new parents on navigating the strange, hyper-social world of parenting! From baby showers and other pre-baby hoopla to throwing and attending toddler birthday parties, Vick's book manages to be comprehensive, amusing and practical. (And don't miss the section on celebrity kid tantrums)

[Caroline · Rating 3 out of 5]

3-4 stars only if you going in knowing full well that this is 100% a humor book, no actual helpful content. My brother mentioned he was thinking of getting it for me after he saw the title, and I said we don't need more books on the bookshelves but I'll pick it up from the library! It is a very fast read, extremely short chapters with a lot of lists and graphs, so easy to pick up and put down.

It is funny too. In as much as you can find humor in the complete overwhelm of being pregnant/a parent/an introvert in the world. The "advice"/"suggestions" in the book are certainly ridiculous, so only actually helpful in reminding you farcically that you do have more coping skills than what is described because what is described is in fact what an insane person would do. It whizzes through many stages of pregnancy-into-toddlerhood. Maybe *not* a good book for someone who borders into socially inept and is still on the fence about having a kid because it obviously only touches on the awful parts of being a parent (of which there are very many).

Overall it's a totally missable book, but was good for a laugh, very easy to digest, and I'm glad I got it out of the library.

[Chris Boutté · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is such a fantastic book, and I wish I had it before my son was born or when he was younger. My son is now 12, but I still binged this book in about a day. Julie Vick managed to touch on just about everything an introverted or socially anxious parent will deal with, and her own over-thinking allows her to cover topics you wouldn’t even think of. Something I learned a long time ago dealing with my own social anxiety and introversion was to always plan ahead, and Vick gives you all of that in this book. She covers everything an introvert would need to know including pregnancy classes, the day of the birth, when your kid throws a tantrum, setting up play dates, and the list goes on and on.

One of my favorite things about this book is that the author cracks jokes throughout the book, and as parents, we can’t take all this stuff too seriously or we’ll go insane. Each chapter is also a quick read, so if you’re a new parent, you can carry this thing around in your diaper bag for quick tips for any situation.

[Hannah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Holy smokes, this book! I’m pretty sure it was written just for me and made me laugh SO hard throughout the whole thing. I felt seen on so many levels.

Julie Vick has written the perfect introverts guide to pregnancy and parenting and I loved every minute of it. She covers it all. How to get out of baby shower games? Check. How to make a phone call to inquire about childcare? Check. Playdates? Check. It’s all here.

I felt so understood reading this book! When she went through the steps on how to make a phone call about childcare, I almost lost it laughing so hard because it was me. I am embarrassed to admit what I have bribed my husband with to make phone calls for me. If you are an introvert and a parent or thinking about parenthood, pick this up! It’s a super fast, easy read that’s relatable and hilarious.

I will be recommending this book to all my introvert parent friends. Something about the author's honest humor takes this to the next level. I absolutely loved every minute reading this book and am sad it’s over! This one is already out and available now.

[Andrew Knott · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received an advanced review copy of Babies Don’t Make Small Talk (So Why Should I?).

I knew I would enjoy Julie Vick’s book because two of my favorite things to read about are parenting and avoiding small talk at all costs, but I was pleasantly surprised that in addition to being a very fun read, Babies Don’t Make Small Talk (So Why Should I?) also has a wealth of actionable advice. It’s a must-read for all parents and parents-to-be and especially those of us who identify as introverts and enjoy carefully examining potted plants in the corner during social gatherings.

The way Vick incorporates subtle humor in unexpected places is delightful and the comedic lists that are interspersed throughout the text are fantastic. One of my favorites was “Cherish Every Moment With Young Kids, Or Not.”

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received a complementary copy of this book for my Little Free Library and decided to give it a read myself. While I *am* an introvert, I’m childfree by choice so I figured I wouldn’t relate and just end up skimming this book. I was wrong.

This book was funny and offered some solid advice for any parent who doesn’t want to be the one volunteering for the birthing demonstration in front of the class. I’ve been watching my sister as a first-time parent this past year and recognized the universality of some of the struggles Vick tackles (why does everyone want to offer unsolicited advice?). I also appreciated the inclusive language used throughout of “person giving birth” or “person in labor.”

While I’m not planning to change my child-rearing plans, I still found this to be a cute, useful book that a new parent could read in snippets while hiding in the bathroom.

[Richa · Rating 2 out of 5]

I could not find it funny. A couple of topics were relatable, so they were not too bad - difficulty interacting with other parents as an introvert, fearing of making so many phone calls and a few things to come ahead in the toddler phase.

Why I did not like it? Since I knew this book is not scientific but based on personal experience, I was expecting more of hilarious personal anecdotes and less of random advice which the book is full of. Random advice that I absolutely detested was a constant reminder to lie to get out of situations you don't like and parenting is so hard so do whatever to survive, for example, get your child hooked to a TV show and get some peace. The kind of advice in this book is really not for me and I did not find it hilarious whatsoever.

[Jocelyn Jane Cox · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is hilarious: Vick nails the relatable, often painful details of early parenthood then twists them just a bit to make them funny.

I am not an introvert but it was kind of alarming how much people-ing I suddenly had to do on behalf of my kid, such as the the storytimes, playdates, and pre-school functions. Looking at all of this stuff through an introvert lens makes it all the more humorous. My favorite part was the Common Bedtime Problems and Solutions. Bedtime is such a tough nut to crack from day one and for many years beyond.

This is one of those books that makes you laugh to keep from crying. Highly recommend.

[Court · Rating 5 out of 5]

As an introvert, this was the first pregnancy book that I found on my own - so I’m here to say, if you’re an introvert and you’re pregnant, I highly recommend this book. It’s short, it’s funny - I often found myself reading parts aloud to my husband (such as the part where she jokes about leaving the country so you don’t have to tell anyone you’re pregnant), and definitely made me feel a little more comfortable knowing that there are people with lots of the same thoughts and feeling as me. This is also the first pregnancy book that I finished while pregnant - a must read for stressed out introverts!

[Alyson · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a fun book! My children are a little older now but I'm always interested in humorous books about parenting because if parenting isn't hilarious, you're doing it wrong. Vick's kind and funny voice really hit the spot. She reminded me of parenting experiences that had a lost a bit of clarity. It's that parenting amnesia she so aptly names and describes. And to my surprise, this is book is not only humorous but full of useful advice. A great baby shower gift! Giving it to the mom down the street with a baby, I know she'll love it!

[Kayleigh Reads · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am in love with this book. If you are looking for a helpful book about breastfeeding or potty training, then this isn't it. But if you are looking for a hilarious and relatable book about dealing with parenting situations while being an introvert, than this book is for you. I immediately related to the author and her view point, being as I am an introverted person myself. I really enjoy how the authors gives some good advice, mixed with some comical advice. Such as blasting "Baby Shark" on repeat to make unwanted guests leave quickly.

I also found the pacing of the book to be awesome, as a mom with a toddler, I don't always have the time to sit for hours and read a book. But Vick's chapters were short and quick to read, while still being enjoyable.

[Anna Harber Freeman · Rating 5 out of 5]

A funny and fresh look at the realities of parenthood! Like many introverts I wasn’t prepared for all the awkward social interactions parenthood would bring. BABIES DON’T MAKE SMALL TALK is such a great book about navigating these situations, offering relatable and entertaining advice. It’s the perfect gift for any new parent (including yourself) who doesn’t relish being the center of attention at their baby shower.

[Jenny · Rating 5 out of 5]

Julie Vick is my people. She is funny and warm and this book is the culmination of her experience as an introverted parent, which I can’t relate to AT ALL, and still this book made me laugh hard, especially her Playdate Screening Questionnaire for other parents. Just … believe me. She has written lots and lots of humor for the New Yorker and McSweeney’s and now you can see why she is so widely published. Nice work, Julie!!!!!

[Becky S · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must read for introverted parents! After mentioning Susan Cain’s fabulous book Quiet in the introduction and referencing The Baby-Sitter’s Club in the first chapter, the author already had my attention. The rest of the book did not disappoint. A quick and informative read, this book is full of humor and helpful tips for navigating the social obligations of parenting.

Thank you to the author for a gifted copy.

[abdulia ortiz-perez · Rating 5 out of 5]

I receive this for honest review. Thank you so much!

This is my first time reading from this author and it was a wonderful amazing read.
What a great read.

How I wish this stuff in this book was around when I had my kids. I was young mom and it was very rough but I did it. Know raising 3 granddaughters. It's alot easier now to raise kids with everything that out for them now.
I highly recommend!
5 stars ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

[Liz Alterman · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a longtime fan of Julie Vick's shorter humor pieces, I was thrilled to hear she'd written a book. Though my children are older, I could totally relate to so many of the hilariously awkward and uncomfortable moments Julie captures here. Her wit coupled with her insightful observations and suggestions made me laugh out loud. This is a perfect gift for new parents. I hope this is the first in a series because parents need these tips at every stage! Thanks for the laughs, Julie!

[Alison Solomon · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a fellow introvert, I can relate to each tableau of motherhood impacted by the challenge of putting oneself out there. Imbued with wit, helpful resources and a gentleness that never punches down, Vick's book is a must-read for any parent, child of a parent, or friend of a parent looking to feel seen.

[Nicole · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received this book for my little free library (@littlefreelibrary78960 on Instagram). Let me first say that I am not in fact a parent. That job seems very hard and I am not up for the task. That being said, if I ever were to become a parent, I feel a little more prepared now. This book is fun while still managing to be informative.

[Elizabeth Collins · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is a fantastic gift for expecting friends. So funny, but very practical too. Wish I had read it when I was pregnant. It was a fun read, reliving and remembering how hard those early years were and how unprepared I felt. Laughed out loud a lot but also felt it was true to the actual experience of having a baby, toddler, and preschooler.

[Masha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Seriously wish this book was around when I first became a parent. It’s funny and incredibly insightful about the various aspects of parenting and pre-parenting. Plus, it’s a treat for anyone who is an introvert or has ever been shy, socially awkward, an empath or just “not from around here.” It also makes a great gift for parents-to-be.

[Phoebe · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not a ton of actual advice, more of a general idea that things are gonna go wrong and we may as well laugh, but that was actually really helpful as I think I've fallen down the advice rabbit hole lately. made me laugh out loud at times. A nice palette cleanser if youve read yourself into a panic as I had.

[Jessica · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious and so relatable as a mother to young children. I don’t consider myself an introvert but I could still relate to all the awkward situations parenthood forces you into. This is a fun, quick read for anyone needing some comic relief from the challenges of parenthood.

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book isn't just for introverts. I'm what the author calls a "shy extrovert" and I really liked it. It covers pregnancy through preschool, so I wish I'd had it earlier! It is funny and relatable and an overall enjoyable read.

[Elizabeth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Julie Vick brings humor, anecdotes and real parental struggles to light in this book. There is so many varied messages given to parents whether they are a first time parent or a parent of multiple children, that this book helps to cut through the noise. Each chapter is broken into a stage or phase of life and throughout the chapters, Julie Vick explores the numerous opinions and views before offering some questions to come away with the reader's own thoughts and opinions. The truths and realities was something I had been unable to find when pregnant in books but even not in that stage of my life anymore, I found this book relatable and found some of my own experiences in some of the examples. Thank you to Julie Vick and Kate Rock Book Tours for a gifted copy! All thoughts and opinions are my own!

[Kayla · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a funny and relatable book with tips for introvert parents (or parents to be) but with a lot of lighthearted sarcasm. I enjoyed this book a lot. Don't take yourself too seriously, starting a family is stressful enough.

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Introvert 🙋‍♀️

When I read the title, I loved it and knew I needed to read it. Oh my goodness! I literally laughed out loud nearly every other page. Not a mom yet, but hope to be, and I think this is one book I’ll come back to.

[Rachel Findley · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a great book with entertaining advice that I very much related to as an introvert myself. 😊

[Reagan Kapasi · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nice gift for parents to be, funny take on the positives and negatives of having a kid