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24/7 Demon Mart Stories #2
Critters from the Poo Lagoon : A 24/7 Demon Mart Creature Feature
One loser, one talking cockroach, and one karate-chopping bombshell stand between YOU and the creatures who just crawled out of the toilet at Jennifer Wallace's charity luau. Wait, what? Back up.
It's Friday night, and the Wallace family is hosting a charity pool party at Caroline Ford Vanderbilt's super snooty Country Club. The daiquiris are frozen, the coconut bras are in place, and the shrimp cocktail is suitably primped and prawned. What could go wrong? Everything. Absolutely everything.
When mysterious monsters emerge from the watery depths, and Grandma Linda's backwoods moonshine mixes with a duo of trailer park mermaids, this party literally goes down the tubes. The Demon Mart crew face what might be their stinkiest foes yet. Can they best the creatures from the poo lagoon? Or is this party literally gonna be an epic turd? Find out in this horror comedy creature feature!
Critters from the Poo Lagoon is a companion to 24/7 Demon Mart, a humorous dark fantasy and horror-comedy book series for fans of Christopher Moore (Pine Cove series), Mark Cain (Circles in Hell), Heide Goody (Oddjobs/Clovenhoof) and Rick Gualtieri (Bill the Vampire).
Critters from the Poo Lagoon can be read at any time AFTER The Graveyard 24/7 Demon Mart #1. It is the second book in the “24/7 Demon Mart Stories” series, a bunch of bonus stories set in the 24/7 Demon Mart universe.
Explore the 24/7 Demon Mart Universe! Two series, one unforgettable adventure.
24/7 Demon Mart series
The Graveyard A Lovecraftian Horror Comedy (Book 1)
Monster This one has zombies in it (Book 2)
24/7 Demon Mart Stories series
Hell for the A 24/7 Demon Mart Christmas Special
Critters from the Poo A 24/7 Demon Mart Creature Feature
It's Friday night, and the Wallace family is hosting a charity pool party at Caroline Ford Vanderbilt's super snooty Country Club. The daiquiris are frozen, the coconut bras are in place, and the shrimp cocktail is suitably primped and prawned. What could go wrong? Everything. Absolutely everything.
When mysterious monsters emerge from the watery depths, and Grandma Linda's backwoods moonshine mixes with a duo of trailer park mermaids, this party literally goes down the tubes. The Demon Mart crew face what might be their stinkiest foes yet. Can they best the creatures from the poo lagoon? Or is this party literally gonna be an epic turd? Find out in this horror comedy creature feature!
Critters from the Poo Lagoon is a companion to 24/7 Demon Mart, a humorous dark fantasy and horror-comedy book series for fans of Christopher Moore (Pine Cove series), Mark Cain (Circles in Hell), Heide Goody (Oddjobs/Clovenhoof) and Rick Gualtieri (Bill the Vampire).
Critters from the Poo Lagoon can be read at any time AFTER The Graveyard 24/7 Demon Mart #1. It is the second book in the “24/7 Demon Mart Stories” series, a bunch of bonus stories set in the 24/7 Demon Mart universe.
Explore the 24/7 Demon Mart Universe! Two series, one unforgettable adventure.
24/7 Demon Mart series
The Graveyard A Lovecraftian Horror Comedy (Book 1)
Monster This one has zombies in it (Book 2)
24/7 Demon Mart Stories series
Hell for the A 24/7 Demon Mart Christmas Special
Critters from the Poo A 24/7 Demon Mart Creature Feature
154 pages, Kindle Edition
First published October 19, 2020
198 people are currently reading
172 people want to read
About the author
D.M. Guay
22 books360 followersDM Guay is a horror fan who mish-mashes her love of all that's scary/gory/geeky/funny into stories about creeps and critters, ghouls and ghosts, and all of the unseemly things that go bump in the night.
Denise lives in Ohio with her 12-foot skeletons. She gives out full-size candy bars on Halloween. She is a stage four kidney cancer surviver (It was bleak. Seriously.), so she donates some of her royalties to the Kidney Cancer Research Alliance. (KCCURE. ORG)
She also runs "Monsters In Your Inbox" a monthly round-up of B-horror movies, horror comedy books, and weird news.
Website: http://dmguay.com
Direct Store: https://payhip.com/authordmguay
Books on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/~/e/B06XVFZ2X2
FB:https://www.facebook.com/DMGuay
Denise lives in Ohio with her 12-foot skeletons. She gives out full-size candy bars on Halloween. She is a stage four kidney cancer surviver (It was bleak. Seriously.), so she donates some of her royalties to the Kidney Cancer Research Alliance. (KCCURE. ORG)
She also runs "Monsters In Your Inbox" a monthly round-up of B-horror movies, horror comedy books, and weird news.
Website: http://dmguay.com
Direct Store: https://payhip.com/authordmguay
Books on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/~/e/B06XVFZ2X2
FB:https://www.facebook.com/DMGuay
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Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 46 reviews
October 13, 2022
Audiobook Review
Like OMG, this one was the best of the series so far.
In this short novella, the night shift goes to a party that Lloyd's mother is having at the country club. While there, the creature from the black lagoon, trailer park redneck sirens, fish men, and a giant poop monster show up.
Lloyd finally got a bit more self aware and had some faith in himself. Not a lot, but a bit.
Not gonna lie, the narration by Todd Haberkorn made this wonderful. I mean, how many people can read about a giant poo monster and make it sound so serious? The sound effects were awesome.
Like OMG, this one was the best of the series so far.
In this short novella, the night shift goes to a party that Lloyd's mother is having at the country club. While there, the creature from the black lagoon, trailer park redneck sirens, fish men, and a giant poop monster show up.
Lloyd finally got a bit more self aware and had some faith in himself. Not a lot, but a bit.
Not gonna lie, the narration by Todd Haberkorn made this wonderful. I mean, how many people can read about a giant poo monster and make it sound so serious? The sound effects were awesome.
January 9, 2022
D.M. Guay is back with another crazy short novel from her 24/7 Demon Mart series (which apparently doesn’t count as part of the main series because it doesn’t happen in the actual demon mart). This time, Lloyd is helping his mother set up a Hawaiian-themed party at the country club to thank a bunch of volunteers for their hard work. They are permitted to do this by perennial thorn in the sideby Caroline, the snooty rich woman who uses the volunteers but detests them. As the reader can guess before page one, everything is going to go wrong.
Lloyd has invited his love interest Dee Dee, who has told the rest of the Demon Mart staff about it so that their manager the cockroach and the loveable demon giant centipede come to the party as well. This complicates things as the rest of the world is not supposed to know about demons, but it’s not the real cause of concern. The real complication is that the party is about to be invaded by water creatures such as trailer park mermaids and a plant guy similar to the Swamp Thing from the comics. It’s a great set of villains who really threaten the party, but of course, they’re only the beginning of Lloyd’s problems.
As if all the supernatural troubles aren’t enough, Guay brings all the sorts of mundane problems one can find at a party in the real world. Lloyd’s grandmother brings extremely high octane moonshine to the party and over-the-top drunkenness quickly ensues. And of course, rich and snooty Caroline is constantly creating the wrong kind of waves for Lloyd and his friends.
All in all, this is another excellent edition to the Demon Mart series and anyone who has enjoyed the first book should hurry up and read it. If you haven’t read the first book (The Graveyard Shift), what are you waiting for?
If you liked this review, you can find more at www.gilbertstack.com/reviews.
Lloyd has invited his love interest Dee Dee, who has told the rest of the Demon Mart staff about it so that their manager the cockroach and the loveable demon giant centipede come to the party as well. This complicates things as the rest of the world is not supposed to know about demons, but it’s not the real cause of concern. The real complication is that the party is about to be invaded by water creatures such as trailer park mermaids and a plant guy similar to the Swamp Thing from the comics. It’s a great set of villains who really threaten the party, but of course, they’re only the beginning of Lloyd’s problems.
As if all the supernatural troubles aren’t enough, Guay brings all the sorts of mundane problems one can find at a party in the real world. Lloyd’s grandmother brings extremely high octane moonshine to the party and over-the-top drunkenness quickly ensues. And of course, rich and snooty Caroline is constantly creating the wrong kind of waves for Lloyd and his friends.
All in all, this is another excellent edition to the Demon Mart series and anyone who has enjoyed the first book should hurry up and read it. If you haven’t read the first book (The Graveyard Shift), what are you waiting for?
If you liked this review, you can find more at www.gilbertstack.com/reviews.
December 2, 2021
I had doubts about reading this one, because yeah it sounds gross. It was alright up until the 60% mark and then sentient poop monster and skip. skip. So much skim reading. The urge to upchuck was a constant with this one. I did like the distractions, Doc and Morty. It was alright. I wouldn't read it again-ever. So so much grossness.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
February 23, 2023
OK listening 🎶🔰
After the first fun book this one was disappointing so I did not finish. Give it a try it may work for you. Enjoy the adventure of reading 👓 or listening 🎶 to Alexa read books 📚. 2023 😢😯😕
After the first fun book this one was disappointing so I did not finish. Give it a try it may work for you. Enjoy the adventure of reading 👓 or listening 🎶 to Alexa read books 📚. 2023 😢😯😕
January 22, 2021
The "My Favorite Quote Read in 2021" contest may already be closed :
"No sentient turd eats the love of my life and gets away with it."
Despite that bit of romantic visualization, my actual rating for the book is a little lower at 3 1/2 stars, which for a VERY quick read is still pretty good. Having just finished "Hell for the Holidays" - the other shorter companion to the 2 main 'Demon Mart' books (though "HftH" didn't feel quite this short) - I have to say a lot of the fun chemistry Guay has put together throughout these tales wasn't quite as ... pungent? would that be an acceptable pun here? ... in this book. Yes, having the Women's Whatever Club involved again was fun, but they weren't quite as present at least to me as we found them at the Wallace Christmas party. And yes, let's be honest: the book is in many ways just one long joke about poo. And a treatise on environmental concerns and capitalism gone wrong... so yeah, poo again.
Still, the creepy crawlies and oozy floozies (ooh, I like that!) we come across at Caroline Yada Yada's country club are pretty neat. Shame I never was into "Swamp Thing" growing up but there are some other pretty cool references to various pop culture immortals along the way (going with a "Caddyshack" reference can only be considered brilliant). But really, the interaction between particularly Kevin, Angel 8-ball (who is ultra-annoying in this book, so yeah, totally in character for a Bible-quoting twit), Doc, DeeDee and Lloyd the Lloveable Lloser just doesn't quite vibe the way it did for me during the holiday special. Yes, the final EXPLOSIVE climax is fantastic (no spoilers because that would stink ... hee hee) and makes everything worth the admission price but still. It just didn't seem to have the same demonique oomph as the other stories did.
Oh well, it was still about as much fun as I could possibly hope to muster on yet another rainy quarantine-y night here in Anti-Paradise. Besides - and here I totally blame an accidental episode of sobriety - I'm just picking really at nits, because Guay's books are absolutely fun stuff. I cannot tell a lie, namely, I cannot wait for more! Let's just hope the sh*t doesn't hit the fan quite so literally next time... snortle...
"No sentient turd eats the love of my life and gets away with it."
Despite that bit of romantic visualization, my actual rating for the book is a little lower at 3 1/2 stars, which for a VERY quick read is still pretty good. Having just finished "Hell for the Holidays" - the other shorter companion to the 2 main 'Demon Mart' books (though "HftH" didn't feel quite this short) - I have to say a lot of the fun chemistry Guay has put together throughout these tales wasn't quite as ... pungent? would that be an acceptable pun here? ... in this book. Yes, having the Women's Whatever Club involved again was fun, but they weren't quite as present at least to me as we found them at the Wallace Christmas party. And yes, let's be honest: the book is in many ways just one long joke about poo. And a treatise on environmental concerns and capitalism gone wrong... so yeah, poo again.
Still, the creepy crawlies and oozy floozies (ooh, I like that!) we come across at Caroline Yada Yada's country club are pretty neat. Shame I never was into "Swamp Thing" growing up but there are some other pretty cool references to various pop culture immortals along the way (going with a "Caddyshack" reference can only be considered brilliant). But really, the interaction between particularly Kevin, Angel 8-ball (who is ultra-annoying in this book, so yeah, totally in character for a Bible-quoting twit), Doc, DeeDee and Lloyd the Lloveable Lloser just doesn't quite vibe the way it did for me during the holiday special. Yes, the final EXPLOSIVE climax is fantastic (no spoilers because that would stink ... hee hee) and makes everything worth the admission price but still. It just didn't seem to have the same demonique oomph as the other stories did.
Oh well, it was still about as much fun as I could possibly hope to muster on yet another rainy quarantine-y night here in Anti-Paradise. Besides - and here I totally blame an accidental episode of sobriety - I'm just picking really at nits, because Guay's books are absolutely fun stuff. I cannot tell a lie, namely, I cannot wait for more! Let's just hope the sh*t doesn't hit the fan quite so literally next time... snortle...
May 23, 2021
What a shitty book! Wait, didn’t you give it five stars? HELL YES I DID BECAUSE ITS SHITTY IN THE BEST POSSIBLE WAY, NOW LET ME FINISH WHAT I WAS SAYING! D.M. Guays 24/7 demon mart series plays like Clive Barker woke up one day and decided to be a writer for Ren and Stimpy. It is just as fun as that bad metaphor makes it sound.
This book, the fourth in the overall series, and the second in the spin off series, is by far my favorite of the books. The title alone should have made this thing sell like at the 24/7 Waffle House at 3am when all the bars close and everyone needs bread coated in sugar to sober up. This entry takes place at a pool party, of course Caroline is their and of course she’s still the most evil vile villain ever written. Seriously, if you’re reading this than you already know how bad the woman sucks. If you don’t, why are you reading a review for a book later in a series? As you could expect from this setup there’s tons of monsters, stripper demons, drink recipes, and actual tons of poopoo. I don’t know what more to say other than grab a board, grab a change of clothes, bring some febreeze, and ride those dark brown waves! SURFS UP.
This book, the fourth in the overall series, and the second in the spin off series, is by far my favorite of the books. The title alone should have made this thing sell like at the 24/7 Waffle House at 3am when all the bars close and everyone needs bread coated in sugar to sober up. This entry takes place at a pool party, of course Caroline is their and of course she’s still the most evil vile villain ever written. Seriously, if you’re reading this than you already know how bad the woman sucks. If you don’t, why are you reading a review for a book later in a series? As you could expect from this setup there’s tons of monsters, stripper demons, drink recipes, and actual tons of poopoo. I don’t know what more to say other than grab a board, grab a change of clothes, bring some febreeze, and ride those dark brown waves! SURFS UP.
April 24, 2023
The author's books are always a whole lot of fun. In this case you have the people from the Demon Mart at a gathering by Caroline Ford Vanderbilt, basically a major nemesis.
You have the Angel 8-ball who is not intent on counting sins. Kevin the cockroach is there, of course, demonstrating his ability to drink liquor. Dee Dee is there in a bikini and Lloyd has things happen which he is unequipped to deal with but somehow has to.
On the other side you have a group of water-borne creatures such as the Gill Guy, an overweight siren and cohorts who aren't exactly where they thought they would be. Then there's the poo creature which smells as bad as it would seem and is a true monster in its own right.
Add in Lloyd's mother and 190 proof alcohol and a bunch of singing, dancing, swinging incubi and you have the means who another delightful adventure.
You have the Angel 8-ball who is not intent on counting sins. Kevin the cockroach is there, of course, demonstrating his ability to drink liquor. Dee Dee is there in a bikini and Lloyd has things happen which he is unequipped to deal with but somehow has to.
On the other side you have a group of water-borne creatures such as the Gill Guy, an overweight siren and cohorts who aren't exactly where they thought they would be. Then there's the poo creature which smells as bad as it would seem and is a true monster in its own right.
Add in Lloyd's mother and 190 proof alcohol and a bunch of singing, dancing, swinging incubi and you have the means who another delightful adventure.
May 19, 2021
A unique but humorous take on the paranormal side of pollution. Lloyd is trying to help his Mom and her ladies enjoy an appreciation night at Caroline's clubhouse. Moonshine, an unlimited bar, blow up palm trees, a drunk cockroach, redneck sirens, his guardian angel and his gloriously risque' Aunt Linda are just a few of the many trials he faces. And before the night is over Caroline is swallowed by the poo monster. Of course saving her is a must, getting there is not easy. But it's fun to read.
February 25, 2023
For a “shortened” story for in between books, this one feels like it belongs with the rest of the series, but that’s just me. I think that the fact that Kevin, DeeDee & Lloyd were supposed to be still on vacation till the new year was an interesting plot point. The thing that made this book good, was that it was set at the local high falutin’ Country Club, a place that Caroline Vanderbilt obviously takes great pride in, yet ish still seems to go completely sideways whenever the 24/7 Demon Mart Crew is around.
January 29, 2021
Great addition to the series
Fun read in the Demon Mart collection of books
What could go wrong at a potluck at the country club, sea creatures poo monsters and paint removing hooch. See a snooty debutante lose her shit, see a managerial roach conduct a team building exercise and watch our young hero battle the most foul thing the sewers can muster. I recommend this book and all in the series.
Fun read in the Demon Mart collection of books
What could go wrong at a potluck at the country club, sea creatures poo monsters and paint removing hooch. See a snooty debutante lose her shit, see a managerial roach conduct a team building exercise and watch our young hero battle the most foul thing the sewers can muster. I recommend this book and all in the series.
January 18, 2021
This will make you smile no matter what is going on in the real world.
I never thought I'd write a review saying how much I'd enjoyed a literal shit show of epic proportions.
This book is excellent, all the characters you have grown to enjoy, with enough twists to make you dizzier than the super strength alcohol being served in the poshest of locations in the book.
I never thought I'd write a review saying how much I'd enjoyed a literal shit show of epic proportions.
This book is excellent, all the characters you have grown to enjoy, with enough twists to make you dizzier than the super strength alcohol being served in the poshest of locations in the book.
December 5, 2021
Lloyd's mom is having a little party for her book club by the pool.
Because reasons there is a bunch of fish monsters around and poo has become sentient.
You know where this is going, don't let the two groups meet... mostly because grandma has a thing for gills.
This one depends heavily on gross out humor. Not a fan personally but overall not too bad.
Because reasons there is a bunch of fish monsters around and poo has become sentient.
You know where this is going, don't let the two groups meet... mostly because grandma has a thing for gills.
This one depends heavily on gross out humor. Not a fan personally but overall not too bad.
May 17, 2023
Hilarious!
I’m impressed at a series of books and novella’s… The phone keeps on going and the author hasn’t run out of steam. Well worth checking out any of the books in the series… They can probably be read out of order without too much confusion, but you will definitely enjoy it more if you can see the progression of the characters throughout.
I’m impressed at a series of books and novella’s… The phone keeps on going and the author hasn’t run out of steam. Well worth checking out any of the books in the series… They can probably be read out of order without too much confusion, but you will definitely enjoy it more if you can see the progression of the characters throughout.
July 31, 2023
Helping his mom at a charity pool party at the country club, Lloyd is hoping for a demon free night. Unfortunately, Lloyd's life is no longer simple and monsters and mayhem, is the new norm in his life. So with Kevin and DeeDee, they need to save the day and keep everyone else in the dark.
October 13, 2024
Another hilarious shenanigan filled demon disaster for the Demon Mart crew! I usually save this series for when I'm feeling a bit gloomy because can always count on DM Guay to deliver giggles, absurdity and a boost of serotonin.
March 12, 2025
Boring. Very boring. It was part of the audio book for part #3 of the series, so listened to it as a bonus, but while the novel had some merit to it, the only merit in this short story is that it had 1-2 good jokes (hence the 2 stars).
October 20, 2020
Just love these books
I just love following this series of books. They are so much fun and the characters so habit-forming. Can’t put them down once you pick them up!
I just love following this series of books. They are so much fun and the characters so habit-forming. Can’t put them down once you pick them up!
November 8, 2020
Moonshine and Strippers
Not your normal country club outing. With D.M. That behind the wheel you know a good time is guaranteed !
Not your normal country club outing. With D.M. That behind the wheel you know a good time is guaranteed !
November 11, 2020
Another solid entry
The series is great, the characters are fun, the action is silly. I read the book in a single day, too much fun to put down.
The series is great, the characters are fun, the action is silly. I read the book in a single day, too much fun to put down.
Read
November 26, 2020Once this writer, is the best!!!!!!
IV down loaded all of her books.And are they funny as he'll, love this author. And all she does please keep up the good writing
IV down loaded all of her books.And are they funny as he'll, love this author. And all she does please keep up the good writing
November 30, 2020
Team building exercises from hell
More fun from the 24/7 Demon Mart crew. The Creature from the Black Lagoon meets the blob meets Caddy Shack.
More fun from the 24/7 Demon Mart crew. The Creature from the Black Lagoon meets the blob meets Caddy Shack.
December 2, 2020
Best Series!
I love this whole series. It’s funny and complex and geeky in all the right ways. Absolute gem! Read it now!
I love this whole series. It’s funny and complex and geeky in all the right ways. Absolute gem! Read it now!
December 2, 2020
Great
Another great book in the 24/7 Demon Mart series. The Demon Mart crew is back to save the day. Loved it!!
Another great book in the 24/7 Demon Mart series. The Demon Mart crew is back to save the day. Loved it!!
January 5, 2021
Pretty good, but more of the same.
January 5, 2021
I simply love this book !
If your are in need of fun ? Just read this or any of D.M. Guay books , it is guaranteed to make you smile !!!
I love , love her books 😁😁😁😁😁
If your are in need of fun ? Just read this or any of D.M. Guay books , it is guaranteed to make you smile !!!
I love , love her books 😁😁😁😁😁
July 18, 2021
Hilarious
This one was super funny. Gross, but funny. I did figure out they needed to use grandma’s hooch way before they did but you know I wasn’t be chased by a poop monster.
This one was super funny. Gross, but funny. I did figure out they needed to use grandma’s hooch way before they did but you know I wasn’t be chased by a poop monster.
December 22, 2021
Brilliant! Absolutely gut busting hysterical! All Demon Mart fans should read this one!
April 28, 2022
Excellent!
I really dig those side stories of Demon Mart. As funny as the main story but we get out of the store for excellent new hilarious and absurd adventures!
I really dig those side stories of Demon Mart. As funny as the main story but we get out of the store for excellent new hilarious and absurd adventures!
January 12, 2023
Oh such a great read Mrs. Guay!
I was cracking up the whole read. I awoke my wife laughing more then once. I can't wait to read 24/7 Demon Mart Stories Book 3.
I was cracking up the whole read. I awoke my wife laughing more then once. I can't wait to read 24/7 Demon Mart Stories Book 3.
January 22, 2023
Still loving it!
This is in my top favorite series ever! Please keep these stories coming. On to the final installment.
Let's do it!!!
This is in my top favorite series ever! Please keep these stories coming. On to the final installment.
Let's do it!!!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 46 reviews