What do you think?
Rate this book
Dear Self
Bestselling author Ruby Dhal releases another explorative gem as she continues to embark on her journey to heal. This 240-page bitesize self-help book uncovers love, loss, grief, healing, self-discovery and hope through pieces of prose and interactive chapters filled with truth residing at the heart of the human condition. Pieces that have been adored by millions of readers all around the world are bundled together in this tender collection that Ruby has carefully compiled to aid everyone on their healing journey. In 'Dear Self', Ruby talks about heartache, loneliness and relationships and takes it even further by diving into fear, insecurities, strength, commitments, the power of pain, what self-love/self-worth mean and self-discovery in light of one's healing journey. As someone who doesn't shy away from speaking about her personal experiences - this is Ruby's rawest book. Details about Ruby's personal life are stripped off for readers all around the world to decipher. In this book, Ruby opens up about her own mistakes, lessons, regrets and experiences of heartache and moving on to shed light on the various tools that will be beneficial for her readers. This is the most interactive and authentic book Ruby has written so far, with the anticipation that the words within this book will encourage readers to mend their hearts, understand themselves better, engage in self-care and love themselves and those around them without insecurities. This book is for everyone who wants to discover more about themselves, accept their imperfections and take pride in their vulnerabilities. This book is for everyone who wants to move on and embrace happiness. This book is for everyone who wants to make a positive change in their life but doesn't know where to begin. This book is for you, dear reader. It is for you.
224 pages, Paperback
Published December 18, 2020
239 people are currently reading
1648 people want to read
About the author
Ruby Dhal
8 books215 followersRuby Dhal is a British-Afghan Sikh writer, poet, TEDx speaker, and bestselling author of six books on self-love, healing, and personal growth. She moved to the UK at the age of three and, within a year, experienced the loss of her mother—an event that shaped her lifelong journey of healing and self-discovery. Ruby shares her wisdom on love, loss, and resilience, helping millions navigate their own paths through her writing and content.
With a social media following of nearly 1 million and millions of weekly impressions, Ruby’s words resonate with readers worldwide. Since starting her platform in 2016, she has been featured in Harper’s Bazaar India’s Writer Hotlist, NY Weekly, Times of India, Yahoo, Verve Magazine, and more. She has contributed to platforms like Thought Catalog, The Tempest, and Indian Women Blog, and has appeared on BBC Asian Network, BBC Radio London, and numerous podcasts.
Ruby was one of only seven South Asian women to be featured in the Harper’s Bazaar India Writer Hotlist in 2017, and she was included in Untwine.me’s list of ‘100 Incredible Instapoets of 2018.’ She has written extensively on self-love, heartbreak, relationships, mental health, culture, and feminism, and has appeared at events ranging from open mic nights to charity events, schools, and renowned venues like Trafalgar Square and The British Museum.
Currently, Ruby is working on her debut fiction novel and aspires to write stories that centre on POC characters, bringing diverse narratives to the forefront. She is committed to living a life of purpose and believes that through both fiction and self-help writing, she can make an impactful difference in the world.
With a social media following of nearly 1 million and millions of weekly impressions, Ruby’s words resonate with readers worldwide. Since starting her platform in 2016, she has been featured in Harper’s Bazaar India’s Writer Hotlist, NY Weekly, Times of India, Yahoo, Verve Magazine, and more. She has contributed to platforms like Thought Catalog, The Tempest, and Indian Women Blog, and has appeared on BBC Asian Network, BBC Radio London, and numerous podcasts.
Ruby was one of only seven South Asian women to be featured in the Harper’s Bazaar India Writer Hotlist in 2017, and she was included in Untwine.me’s list of ‘100 Incredible Instapoets of 2018.’ She has written extensively on self-love, heartbreak, relationships, mental health, culture, and feminism, and has appeared at events ranging from open mic nights to charity events, schools, and renowned venues like Trafalgar Square and The British Museum.
Currently, Ruby is working on her debut fiction novel and aspires to write stories that centre on POC characters, bringing diverse narratives to the forefront. She is committed to living a life of purpose and believes that through both fiction and self-help writing, she can make an impactful difference in the world.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews
May 17, 2024
Hi guys,
For the last few years, i have been going through a lot with my personal stuff.End up reading this thanks to my friend for suggesting this one. I am trying to do the same thing suggesting this! U guys can also try this. U may find this refreshing.
Beautifully written with simple words, cheers to the author for going deep into her own experiences & her learnings.
Kinda of felt like she was giving you hope. Words are touchy..like healing so raw & real. when u go deeper into this, you will feel like someone finally understood you.
Finally, a little hope through dark uncertainties of life.
Share your inputs after reading👍🏻
Cheers Ruby 👏🏻
"Learn To Love Yourself"
For the last few years, i have been going through a lot with my personal stuff.End up reading this thanks to my friend for suggesting this one. I am trying to do the same thing suggesting this! U guys can also try this. U may find this refreshing.
Beautifully written with simple words, cheers to the author for going deep into her own experiences & her learnings.
Kinda of felt like she was giving you hope. Words are touchy..like healing so raw & real. when u go deeper into this, you will feel like someone finally understood you.
Finally, a little hope through dark uncertainties of life.
Share your inputs after reading👍🏻
Cheers Ruby 👏🏻
"Learn To Love Yourself"
March 24, 2021
Ruby has a way with words that resonate with me so much. Not sure how this is possible but I always feel like she knows what I'm going through and what I need to hear right at this moment. There are some very valuable truths in this book. It's just pure comfort for me and I love her writing style. Highly recommend.
June 18, 2021
This book is so moving and so important
May 17, 2021
Closer to 4.5 stars. There were definitely parts of this book that I can't currently relate to, but most of it hit REAL close to home, and I have already shared it with several friends. Highly recommend. :)
March 22, 2022
A really great book. Some things resonated more with me than others and there were some parts that needed a little more editing for grammar and to make more sense but it was a beautiful book. Such inspiration and love and encouragement 💖
October 30, 2022
Very good books. Lots of advice on how to be positive or think better and look at things in differant ways
June 11, 2024
Immensely loved everything about the book. Its so well written , and everything looks so relatable . I would like to thank you infinity for even sharing your story out with the public, it takes courage and it in itself shows how much strong of a women you are♥️♥️♥️😊.
All of the chapters are small , are so very easy to understand. These are the sensitive topics which no one talks about in detail like self - worth, self -acceptance, self - love, finding oneself, impefection, apologize, you are enough, put yourself first, you deserve love and so on.
At first glance all of these look so simple
but these are really deep ones , and the way you have explained all of them , is really great.
Just felt like a heart to heart conversation with you, didnt ever felt like you are not physcially present.
♥️♥️♥️.
Some lines that I extremely loved which are indeed very powerful ones♥️♥️♥️ are as follows:
1) Loved the four points in personal note from I am imperfect to I am still learning.
2)The line , being vulnerable does not mean being weak.
3) Turning weaknessess into strengths.
4) The way you exlained the beauty of self - love and self - worth
That if we love ourselves, we would not let anyone treat us poorly and so on.
Each line was so meaningful .
5) Also the line, if we would love ourselves, we would not settle for less , had a great impact on myself.
6)Finding oneself in joy, tears and everything in between .
7) In all the chapters, where you have spread positivity and light by some statements like you will deserve the right partner, you are worthy, you are deserving , you are enough,again made a huge impact. It was just like you talking as if you are sitting near by♥️ and that self esteem just went from zero to ten.
8) Extremely loved how you explain what exactly loving yourself means, that its just the internal happiness that can make oneself truly happy.
9) The line between self - love and selfishness and the line between self - rejection and selflessness.
10) Listen to those who are close nd introspecting can help.
11) There is nothing wrong in saying No.
12) Your good qualities defining you, like your soft heart, your loving and caring nature
13) Saving oneself and walking away and moving on when needed.
14) The truth that people leave , people let you down and you dont always get a closure and so you might have to create one for yourself and thats how life is.
15)The reminder that the right person exists and they are everything you ever wanted.❤️❤️
16) And if I see myself declining, then those people are not right for me.✨✨✨
17)Love hurts but if you are in a right relationship, it always brings both of you together.
18) And this one extremely wonderful line - that even if you dont find the right person ever
be right for yourself as thats even more important.♥️♥️✨✨✨♥️♥️
19)Not comparing your progress with others, If something does not go right in your life , it does not mean you are a bad person or not worthy.
20)The tough time too would pass, have that faith alive.
21) The much needed statement I am so proud of you✨♥️♥️♥️♥️
Even if u not present physically, just felt it✨♥️
And to this i would like to say
I am so very proud of you too🥰
22) Losing attachments is a part of life. Learn from ur bond , when you lose someone and when you find someone new, try not to repeat the same mistakes.
23)One needs to stop attaching their happiness to other people.
24) Healing is a life long process and is surely not easy.
25) The real truth about being alone and what amazing things it teaches you♥️♥️♥️ and there are so many who are lonely too , its not just you✨♥️♥️♥️ and to take lonliness as a gift, the time alone.
26) Take all the time you need and eliminate negative thinking♥️
27) Importance of things going wrong?♥️♥️
28) Not to cut off people instantly, just trying one more time if you think you made a mistake.
And if still things dont work out, atleast ur heart is not heavy with guilt that u didnt apologize, so just let them go in the end if you still hear no response from them after you apologize.
29) The only days that matter are the ones in which you choose yourself , live for yourself and always be proud of who you are♥️♥️♥️
30) The statement , You will bloom
And i again I would like to say that
So will you♥️🤗🤗🤗🤗
There are so many things that I learnt , just so many and I would surely remember all the magic words whenever life gets a bit low.♥️♥️♥️
I can say that I have surely transformed as an individual after reading this book.🥰🥰 Thanks a lot for sharing such a masterpiece with everyone. God bless you in all the possible ways😇😇❤️
All of the chapters are small , are so very easy to understand. These are the sensitive topics which no one talks about in detail like self - worth, self -acceptance, self - love, finding oneself, impefection, apologize, you are enough, put yourself first, you deserve love and so on.
At first glance all of these look so simple
but these are really deep ones , and the way you have explained all of them , is really great.
Just felt like a heart to heart conversation with you, didnt ever felt like you are not physcially present.
♥️♥️♥️.
Some lines that I extremely loved which are indeed very powerful ones♥️♥️♥️ are as follows:
1) Loved the four points in personal note from I am imperfect to I am still learning.
2)The line , being vulnerable does not mean being weak.
3) Turning weaknessess into strengths.
4) The way you exlained the beauty of self - love and self - worth
That if we love ourselves, we would not let anyone treat us poorly and so on.
Each line was so meaningful .
5) Also the line, if we would love ourselves, we would not settle for less , had a great impact on myself.
6)Finding oneself in joy, tears and everything in between .
7) In all the chapters, where you have spread positivity and light by some statements like you will deserve the right partner, you are worthy, you are deserving , you are enough,again made a huge impact. It was just like you talking as if you are sitting near by♥️ and that self esteem just went from zero to ten.
8) Extremely loved how you explain what exactly loving yourself means, that its just the internal happiness that can make oneself truly happy.
9) The line between self - love and selfishness and the line between self - rejection and selflessness.
10) Listen to those who are close nd introspecting can help.
11) There is nothing wrong in saying No.
12) Your good qualities defining you, like your soft heart, your loving and caring nature
13) Saving oneself and walking away and moving on when needed.
14) The truth that people leave , people let you down and you dont always get a closure and so you might have to create one for yourself and thats how life is.
15)The reminder that the right person exists and they are everything you ever wanted.❤️❤️
16) And if I see myself declining, then those people are not right for me.✨✨✨
17)Love hurts but if you are in a right relationship, it always brings both of you together.
18) And this one extremely wonderful line - that even if you dont find the right person ever
be right for yourself as thats even more important.♥️♥️✨✨✨♥️♥️
19)Not comparing your progress with others, If something does not go right in your life , it does not mean you are a bad person or not worthy.
20)The tough time too would pass, have that faith alive.
21) The much needed statement I am so proud of you✨♥️♥️♥️♥️
Even if u not present physically, just felt it✨♥️
And to this i would like to say
I am so very proud of you too🥰
22) Losing attachments is a part of life. Learn from ur bond , when you lose someone and when you find someone new, try not to repeat the same mistakes.
23)One needs to stop attaching their happiness to other people.
24) Healing is a life long process and is surely not easy.
25) The real truth about being alone and what amazing things it teaches you♥️♥️♥️ and there are so many who are lonely too , its not just you✨♥️♥️♥️ and to take lonliness as a gift, the time alone.
26) Take all the time you need and eliminate negative thinking♥️
27) Importance of things going wrong?♥️♥️
28) Not to cut off people instantly, just trying one more time if you think you made a mistake.
And if still things dont work out, atleast ur heart is not heavy with guilt that u didnt apologize, so just let them go in the end if you still hear no response from them after you apologize.
29) The only days that matter are the ones in which you choose yourself , live for yourself and always be proud of who you are♥️♥️♥️
30) The statement , You will bloom
And i again I would like to say that
So will you♥️🤗🤗🤗🤗
There are so many things that I learnt , just so many and I would surely remember all the magic words whenever life gets a bit low.♥️♥️♥️
I can say that I have surely transformed as an individual after reading this book.🥰🥰 Thanks a lot for sharing such a masterpiece with everyone. God bless you in all the possible ways😇😇❤️
August 17, 2023
Ruby Dhal, the bestselling author, delivers yet another masterpiece with "Dear Self," a compelling exploration of love, healing, and self-discovery. In this 240-page self-help gem, Dhal delves deep into the human condition, offering pieces of prose and interactive chapters that resonate with readers seeking solace and personal growth.
"Dear Self" is a poignant collection that skillfully uncovers the essence of love, loss, grief, and hope. Through candid and intimate pieces, Dhal guides readers through the complexities of heartache, relationships, fear, strength, and self-love. She peels away layers of her personal experiences to provide authentic insights, inviting readers to embark on their healing journeys.
Dhal's writing is both poetic and relatable, creating a safe space for readers to explore their emotions. Her raw and honest narrative style immerses readers in a world of vulnerability, making them feel understood and less alone.
While "Dear Self" is a self-help book, the ideas presented are the characters that truly come alive. Dhal introduces readers to the facets of the human experience with genuine emotion. Each interactive chapter invites introspection and reflection, allowing readers to connect deeply with the themes.
Rather than a traditional plot, "Dear Self" presents a structured exploration of emotions and concepts. Dhal seamlessly weaves her personal experiences with universal truths, providing readers with guidance on self-discovery and personal growth.
The book delves into themes of self-love, acceptance, vulnerability, and growth. Dhal's words encourage readers to embrace imperfections, prioritize self-care, and navigate life's challenges with courage and resilience.
Dhal's raw honesty and vulnerability create a profound emotional impact. Readers will find themselves empathizing with her experiences and drawing strength from her words. The book serves as a soothing balm for those seeking healing.
One of the book's strengths lies in its interactive approach, allowing readers to actively engage with the content. Dhal's willingness to share her own journey lends authenticity to the guidance she offers. Given its focus on self-help, some readers may find the content repetitive if they're familiar with similar themes from the genre.
"Dear Self" is an empathetic guide to self-discovery and healing. Ruby Dhal's candid narrative creates a safe space for readers to navigate their emotions and embrace their vulnerabilities, making it an invaluable resource for anyone seeking personal growth.
Ruby Dhal's "Dear Self" is a testament to her ability to connect with readers on a profound level. Through her writing, she invites readers to embark on a transformative journey of self-compassion and healing. This self-help gem offers a blend of authenticity, guidance, and emotional resonance, making it a must-read for those seeking to explore the depths of their own hearts and minds.
"Dear Self" is a poignant collection that skillfully uncovers the essence of love, loss, grief, and hope. Through candid and intimate pieces, Dhal guides readers through the complexities of heartache, relationships, fear, strength, and self-love. She peels away layers of her personal experiences to provide authentic insights, inviting readers to embark on their healing journeys.
Dhal's writing is both poetic and relatable, creating a safe space for readers to explore their emotions. Her raw and honest narrative style immerses readers in a world of vulnerability, making them feel understood and less alone.
While "Dear Self" is a self-help book, the ideas presented are the characters that truly come alive. Dhal introduces readers to the facets of the human experience with genuine emotion. Each interactive chapter invites introspection and reflection, allowing readers to connect deeply with the themes.
Rather than a traditional plot, "Dear Self" presents a structured exploration of emotions and concepts. Dhal seamlessly weaves her personal experiences with universal truths, providing readers with guidance on self-discovery and personal growth.
The book delves into themes of self-love, acceptance, vulnerability, and growth. Dhal's words encourage readers to embrace imperfections, prioritize self-care, and navigate life's challenges with courage and resilience.
Dhal's raw honesty and vulnerability create a profound emotional impact. Readers will find themselves empathizing with her experiences and drawing strength from her words. The book serves as a soothing balm for those seeking healing.
One of the book's strengths lies in its interactive approach, allowing readers to actively engage with the content. Dhal's willingness to share her own journey lends authenticity to the guidance she offers. Given its focus on self-help, some readers may find the content repetitive if they're familiar with similar themes from the genre.
"Dear Self" is an empathetic guide to self-discovery and healing. Ruby Dhal's candid narrative creates a safe space for readers to navigate their emotions and embrace their vulnerabilities, making it an invaluable resource for anyone seeking personal growth.
Ruby Dhal's "Dear Self" is a testament to her ability to connect with readers on a profound level. Through her writing, she invites readers to embark on a transformative journey of self-compassion and healing. This self-help gem offers a blend of authenticity, guidance, and emotional resonance, making it a must-read for those seeking to explore the depths of their own hearts and minds.
November 28, 2024
Vim parar aqui por acaso. Admito, procurava poesia e acabei por me cruzar com este título... e, houve algo que me xativou, que me puxou para aqui. Sem saber para o que ia, decidi avançar e fui parar a algo longe de poesia, mas com imensas frases poéticas. Este é um livro com o qual toda a gente se vai identificar, porque aborda as fragilidades humanas e as emoções atribuladas que muitas vezes sentimos na pele. Explora o que é sermos nós mesmos, com todos os defeitos e qualidades, com todas as inseguranças e rasgos de coragem, com todas as falhas e tentativas de redenção, com todas as dúvidas e as respostas que acabámos por encontrar. Explora como ninguém é perfeito e como, por isso mesmo, nos devemos amar pelo que somos. De como devemos lutar e trabalhar sempre pela melhor versão de nós mesmos. De como não devemos ter medo de dizer que não ou de partilhar a nossa opinião. Somos únicos e, por isso, somos especiais. Mesmo quando a vida não é fácil e nos assombra com nuvens carregadas de cinza e negro, haverá sempre um rasgo de luz. Acreditar em nós é o passo para um amanhã mais feliz.
March 9, 2025
It’s weird that I can read Order of Nine Angles type shit and be like “that’s crazy” and then move on with my life, but it’s self- help books that absolutely fucking break me. Like, if I was forced to take an AIDS test that I knew would come back clean and forced to go to Sexaholics Anonymous meetings because I was upset that I only heard from a missionary friend once a month but all our other friends could hit her up whenever, then why do my students go as far as they do to get me to yell or to distract me from more immediate concerns? And then the thing of family- if the family members telling me I’m blind to privilege always also go on about how bad we had it when it came to the abuse, sounds like really, they’re dealing with something more current and personal to them. Did we have it bad or didn’t we? I don’t know. I don’t want to keep rehashing it. But yeah, self- help is… especially amateur self- help gurus… it just reminds me of the emotional absences in my own life compared to the intensity of how the world demands my emotional presence.
May 13, 2024
Ruby Dhal is one of my favourite writers. Her words are so pure and real and whenever I read it, it makes me feel really better. I struggle with words at times, when everything feels so good or so bad , and then I go read her words, it feels like I have found every single line to what I feel at that particular time.Those times hit me hard as well as left me in absolute awe of how one can write so beautifully decorated with magical words😭🌸❤
May 13, 2024
'Dear self' is amazing the poetess has written it so nicely in a very simple language even children can enjoy reading , with in depth meanings. Talks about reality some hard ones too, v motivating. Its divided in 6 parts...i read 'medley' and 'i am love' u feel like reading more and more....and more.....congratulations Preeti Bhargava for the great effort👍👍👏🏻👏🏻
May 10, 2022
Wow. This hit so close to home. I am in awe of Ruby’s writing. She has a way with words like I’ve never witnessed before. Such a beautiful, heart-healing and wonderful wonderful read. I’d pass it on to everyone in my life who needs something comforting but also beautifully written to read 🫶
February 7, 2023
Read this twice. The book is in bad shape but I can’t help but pick it up again and again. Ruby has such a way with her uplifting words. It’s a very great read to help you discover self love. I loved it.
August 17, 2024
one of my all time favourite self help books ! i really resonated with this book and it had so many important messages in it that really helped me. i’ve picked it up many times throughout the years since finishing it
May 29, 2021
This book really resonated with me and I can relate to so much of what she said. It brought out raw emotions, and was very inspirational. Good easy read.
June 4, 2021
This book grates me in the way people with good intentions give advice for things they don't seem to know much about when they offer solutions when they have misinterpreted the problems you have.
June 20, 2021
Most of the content already shared on Instagram - still a good read
July 9, 2021
Amazing book!! So much to think and do!!!
February 4, 2022
This was a nice book of poetry I read when I was enduring a difficult time in my life. I would recommend it to anyone who needs a pick-me-up or is undergoing a phase of mental growth.
April 18, 2022
A bit cheesy but I follow the author on Instagram and enjoy a lot of quotes from her books. Would recommend for a quick read a little self-love motivation.
May 5, 2022
It was a great "pep talk" for those who need it and some great information throughout. This book was quite redundant and became quite boring after the first few chapters.
July 6, 2022
A perfect for people that are healing from heartbreak.
September 10, 2022
Brilliant book to read to lift you up every morning! Ruby writes in a way that captures the writer and you always leave feeling lighter! It’s word therapy. Highly recommend
November 13, 2022
This book came at a perfect place in my life. I usually find self-help books cliche and not very helpful, but this was uplifting and encouraging.
September 25, 2023
Love it. Is so good for self improvement and self love.
March 23, 2024
a warm hug in book form. speaks straight to your soul. i will read it again <3
May 10, 2024
A very thoughtful book with great poems.. pleased to read the book...great work author Ruby Dhal 😀
June 16, 2024
Loved reading this book so much. The poetic lyrical prose was so healing and nourishing. Thank you Ruby for this gem!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews